Turmoil

Estelle spent the next day and night by Nighteye's side. She refused to move for anything as she continued to use her healing abilities to help his process, but it wasn't going well. She stayed by his side during his surgery and recovery girl's sessions. But, nothing worked. The spike left a hole too big, and he wasn't going to make it. Estelle could only prolong his time as much as she could, but she couldn't force it. She would just be causing him further pain otherwise.

She was in a daze as she forced her abilities to keep going. The guilt she felt was unbearable. It was always intolerable. This had happened too many times for Estelle to be sane, but she always managed to hang on.

Mr Aizawa and Recovery girl had come to speak to her numerous times to no avail. When Nighteye finally woke up, Estelle began to reply with one-worded answers. They were troubled, but they could not do much for her within the setting.

It was finally many hours later that Nighteye's bed and rooms were crowded by the people who loved him most that she started to gain back some of her bearings. Izuku, Mirio and All Might had walked into the room as Nighteye began to speak to the exhausted girl.

"You shouldn't blame yourself."

"I knew something bad was going to happen; I should have stepped up."

"You followed my orders; I told you to stay. It was my fault and only my fault. I would like to thank you; you have given me the chance to say farewell. I know you saved the spike from killing me instantly. That is more than enough, don't dwell on it. That is not fair to me, okay?"

Estelle's hand clenched onto the mattress as she nodded quietly with a mutter, "It was a pleasure."

Nighteye nodded back before he faced the three males who had entered the room. Estelle remained quiet as she used her healing to soothe his pain in his final moments. The cries of Mirio wrecked her, but she held on like she always did.

Eventually, the beeping noise of the heart rate monitor came to a screeching end. Estelle stayed in her silence as the boys mourned for the hero who was now dead.

Estelle spent the rest of the day in solemn silence in her hotel room. The whole ordeal was a lot for her, and she was frustrated by that fact. She had dealt with so much more, so why was this digging into her soul so much? Estelle could only guess it was because she had been in this world for so long. She had softened to the tame life here.

Her mind was fine in her own world; it was like a machine. It never stopped or broke down; it never failed her in battle. It was always in peak condition for when the next inevitable conflict occurred. Why was it that her mind fell apart as soon as she was out of that? It was like a machine that held broken parts and was clogged to the brim. She hated it. She desperately hoped it would resume as usual back home, once she was back in the constant battlefield. Even when the war ended, Estelle never stopped fighting. She had hoped to step down and live out her days in peace, but then Ryah attacked, and she was thrown into another endless loop.

Estelle felt the sting on her face when she snapped herself back to reality. It was beginning to become a regular occurrence in her life here. It was like the world didn't want her to forget. It followed her everywhere.

The door clicked shut behind her, and Estelle turned around to face Izuku and Kirishima. Their smiles dropped to concern as they stared down at a drained Estelle. She looked the most worn-out they had ever seen her. It was worrisome. The bags under her eyes were dark, and she was slumped over like she would pass out any moment.

"We were going to leave since we've been discharged, and we figured you could tag along. You look dead on your feet though, maybe you should stay another day?"

Estelle shook her head at that. "I don't need to be here for that; I just need some rest. I'll be fine."

The two boys shared a glance from her stubborn response, and their mouths moved to argue. Estelle raised her hand to quieten them whilst she spoke, "Honestly, I'm okay. I'm just tired from all the healing I did for Nighteye; let's go."

Izuku and Kirishima knew any further attempt would be futile, and they followed her out of the hospital. Their eyes kept trailing to her to make sure she was really okay, but Estelle had put up a front to show that they didn't need to bother.

When they reached the outside and were stopped by police officers, Estelle sighed out in dismay. They had been requested to be taken to the station for their statements. Their eyes trailed back to her in apprehension, but their shoulders sank when she agreed. She really should have gotten some rest instead.

When the trio had approached the station, they were all escorted to the same room for interviews. Estelle didn't know how to feel about that. She figured it would be good to have the others understand what happened, but it was still uncomfortable. Pushing her rough mental state back, Estelle answered all their questions for the time being. Her classmates watched on, troubled at her demeanour since it was more closed off than usual.

"Tell us what happened when you arrived."

Estelle revealed the events from start to finish. The awareness set in the two male's bones from what Estelle had to deal with. Overhaul seemed to have been fixated on her becoming his right hand. They shivered at the phrase Overhaul used, 'Queen.'

Nevertheless, Estelle was candid about everything.; even down to the last moment. When they heard about their interaction when she initially joined, it froze them to their core.

"So, you're saying he touched you?"

"Yes."

"He was about to kiss you?"

"Yes."

"Did you remove yourself from the situation?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Because that would have blown my mission. I accepted Overhaul's invitation, and that was inadvertently a part of it."

"Did you want it?"

"Hey! What kinda question is that?! That's not manly!"

"No. I did not. I wanted to throw up."

"I see."

And on it continued. The two males seemed to have gotten the full breakdown of what happened, but Estelle could do nothing about it. It wasn't a big deal anyway.

"We'll let you go now. Estelle, do you want to press charges?"

"No, thank you."

"What!? Why?" Kirishima yelled out, perplexed at her response.

"I'm used to it. Can we go?"

The police officer nodded sadly and watched as Estelle left the room. Izuku and Kirishima shared a glace of distress and confusion before they were interrupted by the officer.

"It's common for those who have experienced these things to drop charges or not report it at all. You'll need to respect Estelle's decision; it was her choice to make. Keep an eye on her going forward, just in case. Now, off with you."

Izuku, Estelle and Kirishima headed back to the dorms with mindless small talk. God, Estelle hated small talk. When the group was close to the Heights Alliance, Kirishima addressed her. His voice was tinged with nervousness as he spoke up.

"Estelle, when you said that you were used to it, or back when you said you had lived enough. Did you mean it?"

"Yes."

"But, why?" Izuku asked.

"Hmm. Eri was lucky enough to be saved by everyone. How many kids in the world don't get that chance? It's a sobering thought, but unfortunately, it's true. Back in my world, there was nobody to save me except myself. It's hard to get back up when your life is surrounded by so much violence and pain. I've lived a fuller life than most. If I died now, I wouldn't wish I did more. Does that make sense?" Estelle thought out loud.

The dullness and truth in her voice were saddening to hear for her fellow classmates. It was a shame to see someone who has so much potential think so little of their life.

"Y'know, that may be the case. But I'm glad you got through it because now we have a kickass classmate who is a crazy good spy! You're a good person, so maybe stick around and kick more butt with us, huh?!"

Estelle halted briefly, startled from the kind words and gazed appreciatively at the redhead.

"Thank you", Estelle muttered. It touched her soul. Right now, though, she still needed to pull herself back together before she could fully comprehend it. Kirishima beamed back happily with a thumbs up before the other work-study students joined them. The group collectively walked through the entrance together.

"There you guys are!" Mineta bawled as he raced towards the group. Estelle glowered and used him like a football, pelting him across the room. She didn't want to see his face right now, and the class didn't care much in the relief of the returned arrivals.

"All of us were worried about you", Momo added, the class circling the group.

"Yeah, we saw the news", Kaminari joined in.

"Is anyone hurt?" Sato asked.

"It was terrifying", Ashido shrieked.

Estelle ignored the rest of the student's words as it was too much to take in. Moving to leave, she was hindered by Iida. "Enough of this! I know everyone was worried. But, calm down! Our classmates have been through an ordeal. If you want to help, you should console them quietly. Let them rest their bodies and their minds. I'm sure today wasn't just taxing physically, but mentally as well."

Izuku and Kirishima gazed at Estelle with those words, aware that she had struggled a lot with the events that had taken place. The class took note of the glance.

"It's okay, Iida. Really."

"Then if I may. How could you scare us like that!? What if you never came back?!" Iida bellowed as he shook Izuku back and forth. Estelle let out a snort from the sight, the first flicker of amusement all day. The two males sighed in comfort at that.

"I'll go make some lavender tea! That's sure to ease your minds!"

Estelle groaned from the sound of it. "That would be amazing. Thank you, Momo."

The female turned in wonderment and gave a gentle smile. She was overjoyed by the unexpected response. "Coming right up!"

Estelle disregarded the class when she was given her cup of tea. She silently sipped at it, sitting far away from her fellow students. It felt good to have some comfort. Tea was always going to be the best choice. Thankfully, the class mostly left her alone. They were aware Estelle would need to recuperate alone. They had figured out she was an introvert.

Lost in thought within her tea. Estelle missed the gaze of Bakugo watching her. She stared at her cup for a long time.

"All right, everyone to bed! You need your rest!" Iida yelled out.

The class groaned in response and moved to leave. The students halted briefly at Iida's considerably softer words.

"Hey, Estelle."

"Huh?" She was startled from her staring contest, brought to reality.

"You should get some rest." He repeated gently from her disoriented expression.

Estelle shook her head quickly. "No, I uh, I need to patrol. I'll be quick, and then I'll go."

"I insist that you leave it for tonight."

"Let her be. She doesn't rest easy without doing it." Bakugo reprimanded before standing to head to bed.

"Oh, okay. Make sure you come back quick to have plenty of rest. We don't want you getting ill."

Estelle smiled back sadly from the underserved care and nodded slightly. As everyone was leaving, Estelle slowly walked out of the entrance with a slump, her hand in her pockets. The class eyed her in concern.

"Does anybody else notice the fact she's not being her usual self?" Sato asked.

"Yeah, she seems more down than anything", Jiro added.

"She had to play as a double agent today. It was hard on her." Izuku explained to the class, who halted in astonishment from the new information.

"What do you mean?" Bakugo demanded, which immediately put Izuku on edge.

"Uh! Well! She had to pretend to betray the heroes in the event we couldn't save Eri. It was a backup plan; she had to play the villain. It seems to have affected her more than I thought."

"Let's not forget what that Overhaul creep did to her; I'm surprised she didn't have another episode", Kirishima muttered. Only a few people heard, and they swirled to him in shock but kept quiet. When the class made their way to the dorms, Kirishima found himself startled when he was pulled away from the group by Bakugo.

"What did he do?" He asked, heat bubbling up in his veins.

Bakugo found it challenging to fall asleep.

His mind tried to comprehend the words he had heard from Kirishima as he gazed at the ceiling. Giving up, he eventually trailed downstairs to the kitchen for some warm milk. He hoped it would help put his mind at ease.

Bakugo came to an abrupt stop when he saw the television playing in the living room. Trailing closer, Bakugo found that it was a show.

A nature show.

Estelle was laid on the couch, covered in blankets and with a cup of tea whilst she shivered to herself. She didn't detect him as he stomped to the kitchen and heated up some milk.

When that was done, he took the cup and walked back to the couch where Estelle was bundled up. Without a word, Bakugo took a seat next to her and placed her blankets over himself as well.

Estelle gazed at him in bewilderment whilst he did so.

He was soundless as he took a few sips of his milk. Finally, he vocalised. "What's wrong?"

Estelle just shook her head in response and stayed quiet.

"Don't bullshit me! What's wrong?" He demanded again.

Estelle groaned to herself and shrugged. "I could have prevented a lot if I just disregarded my orders."

"You couldn't have known that at the time, idiot."

"I should have known, though. I've followed a lot of orders in my life, yet I keep making the same mistake by following them."

"Tch, moron. How else would you do your job? Nobody can know everything. You do what you can and then move on. It's a part of life." Bakugo reprimanded.

Estelle nodded solemnly. Bakugo hated it.

"It's a lot more than that, though, isn't it?"

Estelle nodded.

"Tch. Put your head on my lap."

Estelle did so without a word, the scent of spices and warmth hitting her nose.

"Heh, seems like you are good at following orders."

Estelle let out a tiny chuckle at his words before his hand comforted her mind.

They stayed like that for a long time.