Beta: phoenix-before-the-flame
So while I am well aware I said this chapter would be coming out on the 20th, I felt I'd just go ahead and share it over the weekend rather than post on a Monday. So, surprise! Two days early!
Mild Warning for Panic Caused by PTSD.
There was something oddly familiar with the situation Lucy woke to.
Dazed from sleep, she groggily sat up, The heavy furs slid off her body and a shiver passed through her when chill air touched her skin. She'd woken, startled as rough hands shook her by the shoulders until the dreams that captivated her were chased away. She rubbed her eyes, yawned, then blinked as a calm confusion settled in. What was there to be scared of?
It wasn't the first time Lucy shared space with Natsu, but his presence in her home that night wasn't common. "... What are you doing here?"
Natsu didn't answer. Not immediately. His breathing was ragged and he knelt before her bed looking as if the very devil had chased him there. His skin was sickly compared to the usual, warm bronze he boasted and sweat dripped down his brow. Lucy couldn't remember a time she'd ever seen him hot enough to so much as glisten, but it was the wild terror in his eyes that troubled her most. Her confusion slowly melted to concern.
"Is something going on? Do we need to leave?" The questions began to tumble from her mouth, but Natsu's trembling silenced her. Bracing his shoulders, Lucy tried to make sense of expression on his face. Was he… afraid?
"I-" He began, voice a hoarse whisper before dying out again. Natsu's breathing slowly began even out while his wild eyes examined her from head to covered toe. Too stunned - or relieved- to speak.
Lucy was reminded of a time when a younger girl had joined her bed one night. Her former clan member had been terrorized by sleep terrors and waking to a lonely bed had sent the child to Lucy's cot, begging for comfort. Natsu wasn't a child. Nor was he prone to terrors as far as Lucy knew, but the haunted expression on his face spoke volumes.
Lost and utterly afraid. The realization made Lucy's heart ache.
If it was upsetting enough to bring him here, then it meant something, even if that meaning was lost to her.
"Come on then."
Natsu blinked, staring as Lucy slowly moved closer to the wall, making space under her many furs for him to join her. "You're … inviting me?"
Necessity had them share sleeping space together when they traveled alone in the woods, but Natsu and Lucy both knew the few times he'd joined her bed, often to keep her company from her own nightmares, Natsu would claim, but Lucy had always panicked and pushed him aside. To see her offering the space confused him, but only for a second.
"I can make an exception." Lucy spoke through a small yawn, the sleepy smile that followed relaxed his shoulders. Good. That's the reaction she aimed for. "Just for tonight. We're both adults with our own space, after all, but…"
Natsu didn't need further prompting. He clambered under the furs with a sheepish, embarrassed silence and settled in with relative ease. Lucy adjusted herself only once before turning her back to him to face the wall. Whatever had brought him to her bed, he obviously couldn't find the words to express it. Lucy wouldn't pull the truth from him, but she could provide some comfort at least.
"Don't wake me until the sun's up next time." She murmured sleepily. Lucy thought Natsu had answered her, but his voice was muted to the sounds of her own breathing. Sleep had reclaimed Lucy the instant she'd shut her eyes. Natsu wasn't so lucky.
Eyes shut or open, he saw the vivid details of his dream with a sickening clarity. The expression of betrayed horror on Lucy's face. The blood flowing from shredded skin, the shrill scream that made tears prickle at the corners of his eyes, the…
The sour taste of bile bubbled in Natsu's throat. He turned his focus on Lucy's back, listening to the rise and fall of her lungs. The physical knowledge of her well-being eased him, but the small temptation to move closer, press against her back to listen for the proof of her existence was almost too much. He resisted the urge, screwed his eyes shut and willed his body to sleep. It was a blessing enough to have comfort.
He wasn't about to squander it trying to do something stupid.
Lucy woke to the slight sounds of birds on her roof. The soft trilling of a new nest being built. If she wasn't so comfortable and the edges of sleep hadn't held fast to her mind, she would have recognized it as one of the many signs to Spring chasing the chill of winter away. For now, she couldn't be bothered. It was warm and inviting under her furs and the security of a warm arm over her shoulder was too nice to reject. With a satisfied groan, she nestled into the heat and kept her eyes tightly shut. The throes of sleep were already fading, but Lucy quietly wished she'd slip back into slumber, if only to enjoy the moment a little longer.
A few more seconds came with the bird above their heads and Lucy's eyes flung open instantly as realization dawned on her. An arm around her shoulder and the frantic shaking she'd received overnight-
Natsu!
How could she forget?! Lucy's gaze tilted to the arm that embraced her, a stark contrast to her lighter skin, and the heat on her back breathed in and out at a steady pace, fanning air against her as her heart leapt into her throat. Only one thought crowded her mind.
Natsu is cuddling me. Natsu. Is. Cuddling…
Lucy gulped for air and tried to wriggle her way out of his grip. She resisted the urge to elbow him, to shout at his lack of personal space. But she had to find a way out. It wasn't his fault. Not this time. She invited him after all. But the arm tightening caused a stutter of breath to die in Lucy's throat. She had to get up. Now.
"N-Natsu…" She hissed, voice becoming shrill as the seconds ticked by. "Wake up!"
A low grumble and Natsu's answering action was to nuzzle his face into her hair, the heat of his breath sending a shiver down Lucy's spine as goosebumps rose along her skin. She squeaked then, voice reaching an even higher pitch.
"Natsu!"
She began to squirm, inching her body around in an attempt to escape his iron hot grip. Her stomach was doing odd flips, threatening her with nausea and the heat on her face came from more than her suddenly constricting blankets. With a twist of her hips, Lucy flipped over, calling Natsu's name frantically as her hands moved to roughly shake him- a return gesture from the night before.
"Wake up, now!" Her order became panicked between each jerk, taking in a desperate gulp of air when he lazily lowered his arm to drape over her waist. The panic settled and Lucy's mind screamed while her body froze: paralyzed. "You have until the count of ten before I shove you off."
The warning fell on deaf, sleepy ears, but Lucy hoped it reached him either way. Somehow.
Through gritted teeth she began to count despite the anxiety telling her to do anything else. "One… Two … Three …"
Onward the count went and Natsu's face scrunched in a way that Lucy could have found endearing on a normal day, but the way her heart tightened like a vice took the air from her lungs and made her fight or flight kick into overdrive.
Fingers shook him at each interval and desperation began to bleed out into her voice. Not anger. Not embarrassment. Fear.
It's hard to breathe-!
The distant shouting of a battle long gone echoed in her mind. The shouts of women and men assaulted and beaten. The burn of a rope stung against her wrists while the panicked breathing of her jaunt through a darkened forest filled Lucy's mind. The trees looming and twisted as branches scraped her skin.
She gasped as the stench of a burnt corpse rose in her memories, barely holding back a gag when it seemed to waft through the air.
The weight was frighteningly familiar. The press of a man's hands against her body. The threat -the promise- of his intent clear as his finger greedily groped her flesh. His rancid breath soured the air filling her nostrils.
But then his corpse as it burned and sizzled against the ground, scorched without mercy and black smoke twisting lazily upwards-
"Ngh… Lucy?"
Natsu's voice cracked through the memory, hoarse from sleep as confused eyes stared into her own. Lucy dazedly stared back, reality swimming back into focus as she gulped down another, desperate shaky breath.
"... what happened?" His voice was hoarse, worse than when he'd woke her during the night. The sleepiness had yet to leave him as Natsu moved a lazy hand towards her face to wipe away a stray tear from her clammy cheek.
Lucy exploded.
"Goawaygoaway Go away!"
She slapped his hand back, body lurched backward and crashed into the wall. She pressed back against it desperately. She needed to be away. She needed him to go away. She needed-
Lucy whined and realized there was more tears than she could count dripping down her face. Her nose felt stuffy and a sob wracked her frame. "L-leave me alone!"
Natsu reacted immediately. The exhaustion fell from his body as he sat up, worried gaze checking her for damage as she scrambled and his hands rose to balance her. "Oi, Lucy, it's okay-"
"Don't TOUCH me!" She snapped. Fear laced her words and cracked her voice. His hands froze mid air, hovered, then lowered slowly.
"Lucy." Natsu tried again, voice low as if he feared startling her more than he already had. He pulled his hands close to his body, palms facing outward for her to see. "I'm not going to touch ya, see? It's okay. I'm not going to hurt ya'. Please. I promise."
Seconds ticked by between them as Lucy's frazzled nerves tried to collect the pieces of her heart that had shattered in seconds.
She rocked back on her heels, as if to spring forward and escape. Her fingers sank deeper into the wooden walls, splinters pricking at her fingertips. They felt too big. Too close. Looming too far above her head, threatening to close in on her. To take her. He was going to-
Her chest felt tight.
She couldn't think.
The screams still echoed and she struggled to chase them away, tears now racing down her cheeks and dripping off her chin.
Her body wanted to run, to escape. But from what? Her room was empty of everyone except Natsu. Natsu sitting there patiently, waiting for her. And he.. He…
"You're safe, Lucy." His voice continued to soothe her, chasing away the darkness in her battered mind, "Whatever happened, it's gone now. What do you need? Water? Food? Do you need me to leave? I'll do it, but can you breathe for me first? In and out, like that." She nodded wordlessly, confused and unsure of what to say.
Taking in gulps of air, she followed Natsu's direction until her lungs expanded and closed in a steady rhythm.
He's right. I'm not there. It's not the camp. Those men are dead. Natsu saved …
A few more silent moments as Lucy's racing thoughts slowed and the stream of tears dried upon her cheeks. She didn't understand why the fear had resurfaced, why her panic had returned for such a small thing, but with Natsu's worried coaxing as he kept his distance, just waiting for her word, her body began to relax.
Peace.
The echoes of the past fell away and Lucy became acutely aware of her surroundings. The warmth of her bed. The coarse feel of the furs beneath her fingers after she released the wall. The gentle howl of the wind and choir of birds outside. Natsu hadn't lied: she was safe.
"I'm… " Lucy's jaw felt sore as she struggled to find her words, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to- I just-"
Natsu cut her off, "Don't say you're sorry. I ain't upset."
She bit her lip and whimpered.
"Do you need anything?" He asked again.
"... I…" She didn't know, but thinking about it helped calm her more as she took in a deep breath, counted to ten, and finally met his eyes. "Can I have some water, please?"
Natsu grinned, relieved. "You got it."
He didn't touch her for the rest of the day.
He couldn't.
Not after seeing the horror on her face. The disgust. The … Natsu wasn't sure how to word it, but what glimmered in Lucy's eyes in those scant moments between them wasn't a look he ever wanted to see again. Was it his fault? He recalled sharing space with her before, the few times he'd taken to her cot while at camp when nightmares plagued her. She hadn't reacted well those following mornings, certainly, but had it ever been like that?
Natsu couldn't recall, but whatever the cause, he was determined not to repeat it. While the majority of his mind realized Lucy's reaction hadn't been entirely directed at him, the fact he had triggered it was enough to fill him with guilt. He'd rushed to get her the requested water, sloshing some on himself as he went. He'd nearly tripped over her chairs and a rug, in his haste to help her.
The near falling on his face elicited worry from Lucy, but her face finally split into a half-hearted smile when his clumsiness was too much to ignore. A saving grace.
It was his fault, wasn't it?
He just HAD to visit her over a dream. He just had to check on her, to.. To.. Natsu realized he was beginning to question his own motives and confusion fogged his thoughts until it gave him a headache. What did he think would happen from a dream? That she wouldn't be safe in her bed? Of course she was! She was in the safest place on Earth, right?
With that decided, Natsu took on the responsibility of her panic that morning and swore to keep his concerns to himself. When he was assured Lucy was calm, he offered to leave, stunned when she shook her head, offering breakfast in return. The small meal of dried fruit and nuts wasn't enough for his bottomless stomach, but he enjoyed it all the same, eyes never failing to flicker over Lucy's frame, cautiously optimistic that her mood wouldn't drop again.
"Did you uh- " Natsu struggled for a topic of conversation, anything to keep the quiet from invading the space. To give him time to think, "-you got any plans today?"
Lucy considered the question as she nibbled her food, recollection slowly lighting in her eyes. The gloom and darkness on her face had faded to reveal the soft, gentle smile she was capable of and Natsu's relief grew more palpable by the second. "Mirajane wanted me to meet someone today. Said they would teach me some of the dances being held during the Spring Festival."
That caught his attention, eyes widening as he realized Mirajane's intention. "Lisanna's back?"
"Who?"
"Mira's lil' sis. She's great at dancing. Taught me some stuff before! Or tried to, I guess." He amended. "Mira, her and their brother used to travel a lot. Even more than the group does. They'd be out there for really long stretches of time! But when Mira partnered up, she didn't travel as much. Lisanna and Elfman still do, though. I didn't know we'd see 'em this year. Usually they travel for longer."
Lucy hummed her interest, drinking in his words before giggling. "Someone actually tried to teach you how to dance? How did that go?"
Natsu shrugged, feigning indifference, "eh, about what you're imagining I guess."
"So a disaster then?" Lucy failed to hide a snicker, biting her lip.
"Oi, I'm offended." Natsu spat in mock defense, "how do you know I wasn't the best at it?"
"Because you're talking in past tense."
He grumbled, finishing his plate and shifted his gaze towards the doors, sheepish, "why you gotta be so smart, huh? Kinda cheating, don't you think?"
Lucy no longer attempted to muffle her laughter and opted to laugh loud enough to make his ears ring, but in a pleasant way. The kind of way that told him she was feeling much more like herself. Mission successful. Their conversation took off like many they'd had before and soon, with a still growling stomach, Natsu made his leave.
Agreeing to help with fishing was all well and good, but not if he was late for the tide change.
When he left, Natsu made sure to remind Lucy to check in with Mirajane and froze just before patting Lucy's shoulder, a habit he'd gained over their time together. Chuckling, he pulled his hand back, briefly running it through his hair and quickly darted out the door before Lucy had a chance to call it out. If she had even noticed.
Don't touch me! The shout still echoed well into the day.
Lucy wasn't sure what just happened. His exit was quick. Too quick. Quicker than she expected.
As if he'd been running from something. And her shoulder, untouched, felt the chill of the air, as if disappointed by the lack of warmth being placed upon it that she'd come to expect. Shoving the feeling aside, she grasped her cane and left to find Mirajane. The day was to be a busy one, after all, and she'd kept the others waiting for long enough.
Oddly, Mirajane was surprised when she opened her door for Lucy. Her hair was askew in many places and her eyes puffy and red. Her clothes were unexpectedly frumpy, as if she'd hurried putting them on, or.. Had they been crushed? Lucy felt her stomach drop as she looked upon Mirajane with rising concern.
"Lucy? Oh dear, I'm so sorry, I hadn't realized the time-" Mirajane explained, voice a rush as she wiped her eyes.
Apparently, Lucy realized she wasn't the only one having a bad morning. "... did something happen with you and Laxus?"
"What?" Her rambling stopped mid-sentence as her eyes widened, "Oh, Laxus he.. Oh dear, no, no, that's not it at all. Never mind that. I'll be fine." Her flurry of words made Lucy wonder to the truth of them, but Mirajane gave no other opening to ask as she whisked them both out of the doorway, joining Lucy outside. Wiping her eyes, she smiled a watery grin and patted Lucy's shoulder. Whether to reassure herself or Lucy, she wasn't quite sure.
"I'll be okay, I promise. Do me a favor and don't tell Laxus what you saw, please?"
"Mirajane," Lucy began, voice a low warning, "not that I just go around attempting conversation with him, but this sounds really-"
"Please." Mirajane pressed, jaw tense. "I'd rather not explain right now, but I will if I have to."
Lucy considered pressing for more details, but the helpless look in Mirajane's eyes, the way her lip quivered, and the memory of Natsu comforting her without attempting to press her for details helped her decision. She sighed, "you don't have to tell me anything unless you want to Mirajane. I'll.. keep quiet. Just so long as you're not hurt and he's not causing it. Okay?"
The answering grin was all Lucy needed to drop the subject entirely. For now.
"Perfect! Now, what was the plan for today again? Oh yes, I was going to take you to see Lisanna for lessons!" She squealed, her excitement bubbling to the surface and brought her back to her usual self. The despondence from a few moments ago became a distant memory. A gleam was in her eye now, as she strolled along the path, ushering Lucy to follow her. "But first, we'll see Wendy. She'll be upset if we don't let her perform her weekly check up, after all. How is your leg by the way?"
Something told Lucy that Mirajane was filling the air with chatter to distract from earlier. She accepted it in stride, catching up to the woman with a soft, timid smile. "It's fine. Well, as fine as it can be. Walking is a bit easier, but I still can't go for very long without the cane. I went without it for a bit when I woke up today, but Natsu kept hovering over me the entire time…"
"Oh?" Mirajane paused, eyes sliding to glance at Lucy with a curious smile, "Natsu came over so early?"
"Uhh, yes… early. That.. you could say that." Lucy edged, unsure how to read Mirajane's expression.
"Oh my goodness, don't tell me he stayed over?" She gasped, tilting her head to look into Lucy's eyes while she covered her mouth. "What a scandal! Lucy you should've told me! I didn't know you too were that far into your relationship for that."
Lucy almost dropped her cane. "What," She sputtered, cheeks heating up, "Mira! That's not what's happening at all! This isn't the first time he's come over to check on me and you know it."
"Hmmhmm, I know, but you're so cute when you're flustered."
"Wha- hey, that's… why are you teasing me all of a sudden?"
The denials came and went, and soon their emotional mornings were forgotten. For now. Green grass was replacing the frost, poking through the soft soil and Lucy thought she caught the sight of a few butterflies drifting from flower to flower. More signs of spring. She took in the sights, the smell of plants awakening from their sleep-like death and talked breezily with Mirajane over their plans for the day.
If Mirajane tried to ask about Natsu's presence in Lucy's home, she deflected quickly, uncertain if Natsu would appreciate his strange terror being spread about the town. Would he want the others to know? Or did he neglect to explain himself for the sole fact he wanted no one to know? Lucy couldn't be sure, but she wasn't about to break confidence until she had more information.
Besides, there were more important things on her mind. "So, Natsu tells me your siblings travel a lot. Why is that?"
Finally, a topic neither wanted to deflect. Mirajane's expression grew soft at the mere mention of her siblings. Mysterious strangers Lucy had yet to meet and barely knew the existence of until recently. "We used to travel to our old village. It's quite a ways down south and we like to pay our respects to the residents who used to live there."
Lucy stumbled over her own thoughts and feet, "Oh I'm.. I didn't mean to bring up bad memories-"
"Nonsense!" She explained, a soothing voice practically oozing from her lips. "We don't know if they're gone or not. The village itself just flooded over, but our parents' graves are there. So we feel it's only fair to visit, you know? It's just so far away, that the journey takes longer than most. So they collect information on the other clans in the area as they go, while we hunt and trade for other necessities. It used to be so much fun…"
Mirajane's wistful sigh made Lucy wonder if she wished she still joined on those travels. "And you stopped going because.. Of Laxus?"
"Well," Mirajane hedged, eyes glancing to the sky as she considered the question. "Yes and no. We became partners, so it felt weird to leave for 2 years at a time when his own travels dont take so long. And .. well… as his partner I do help manage the clan along with him and Makarov, haven't you noticed?"
"Huh.. I guess that makes sense."
Their conversation came to a sudden halt then, as they came upon a small yurt covered in faded colors of yellow and orange. Lucy had seen it in passing many times during the winter, but only now did she truly get a good look at it. The colors looked as if they were once vivid and bright. Winding garlands and wispy curtains escaped the small windows with the breeze. It formed a very quaint set up.
Before she could ask if this was the location of Mirajane's siblings, the question was answered by the door swinging open as a girl, smaller than Lucy, but hair as white as Mira's, bounded down the steps in beaded sandals.
"You're here!" She exclaimed, bouncing into Mirajane's arms. The two laughed, swinging about while Lucy watched, a frozen, awkward smile on her face. Their smiles were bright and happy, and Lucy felt the warmth of their laughter and the chill of being the spectator all at once.
Had they.. Not seen each other yet? Lucy could have sworn she heard Mirajane mention visiting before, but perhaps she had misremembered?
"Lisanna, I was here just the other day for dinner, no need for dramatics now." Mirajane chided, but the reprimand did not match her tone or the way she ruffled Lisanna's much shorter hair. "Where's Elfman?"
"Oh he said he was going to help with fishing today. He asked me to say hello for him and to apologize for not being here. He was itching to show off his new muscles to Natsu." She winked, giggling and with a jolt of surprise, she caught Lucy's gaze, expression dropping for a second before popping back up just as bright. "Oh! Is that Lucy?"
That was her cue, "H-hello, it's very nice to meet-" but the greeting was cut short by Lisanna's arms pulling Lucy into a tight hug, a new spin given with enough speed to make Lucy dizzy. "Nice to meet you!"
"It's so nice to meet you, too! Mira has told me a lot about you." Lucy's grip on her cane failed and the resulting clatter caused Lisanna to release Lucy from her tight hold. "Oh gosh! I'm so sorry, Mira warned me you had to use a cane, but I forgot-"
"It's okay. No harm done." Lucy assured, panting slightly from the surprise. Before she could retrieve the dropped item, Lisanna had plucked it from the ground, offering it to her hands with an apologetic grin.
"Well, let's not keep standing here in the cold." She pressed, ushering to Lucy and Mirajane both. "Let's go inside, have some hot tea and then we can start the fun part!"
Lucy honestly felt as if a whirlwind had run off with her, but it wasn't an unfamiliar occurrence. Everything related to this clan was the same, afterall.
It was well into the evening when Natsu returned to pick Lucy up.
It wasn't necessary. He knew that. But with Elfman in tow, a man so burly he rivaled the walls for space, he felt it worth the walk. He hadn't greeted Lisanna yet, after all, and that was a misstep he'd soon rectify. Elfman took the reasoning in stride, broad grin reflecting his joy as he walked among the family he'd missed all year.
"It'll be great. Lisanna missed you too." He said, agreeing with Natsu's plan to join him. The two had run into each other while fishing. It was a meeting that led to an impromptu competition for who could catch the most fish, but when they had dropped their catch off at the local fishery, neither could truly claim a win.
Natsu, would of course, state he had the most (and the largest), but Elfman's broad shoulders carried the majority of it and his own claim was the majority instead. Neither would bend on this, but no one else bore witness to judge one way or the other. With the two heading back to Elfman's family hut, Natsu was eager to see the rest of the siblings, grin splitting his face nearly in half. He had truly missed seeing the three together. Things weren't the same when they split after all.
Though, as they approached with the earlier scents of Lucy and Mirajane still faint on the trail, Natsu had to begrudgingly admit (to himself) that he had other reasons to pick up Lucy. The events from that morning weighed heavily on his mind and with each crunch of his feet in the gravel, he fell further and further back into the memory of it. He was worried. It was obvious. And while Elfman clearly picked up on it, the larger man made an effort to keep quiet. Natsu appreciated the restraint.
The Fairies With Tails weren't known for holding back, but it could still happen on the rare occasion.
'Don't touch me!' The shout still rang in his ears and Natsu grunted, mentally pushing it back. But the terror in Lucy's eyes and the tears that spilled stayed seared in his memory.
Lucy would be okay though, right?
He figured Mirajane would know what to do, if no one else did. But that look, it haunted him.
"What do you think they were doin' all day, anyway?" He asked, mostly to distract himself.
Elfman shrugged. "Lisanna mentioned something about the dances. I bet Mirajane put her up to it. This Lucy girl doesn't know much about them right?"
Natsu hummed his agreement, "Well, she's been told some of it, but it's not like she's seen or done any. It's her first time, y'know."
"Right, right," Elfman looked to the darkening sky and grinned, "Then I'll bet she's learning some of the moves then! Lisanna can't resist showing off and getting new dancers. She probably jumped right on that opportunity."
"No way, Lucy can't do that!" Natsu spluttered before giving his words any thought. Elfman frowned and sent a glare his way.
"And why not?"
"She's got a bum leg!"
"... oh." Elfman flushed, feeling sheepish before he thought back on the things he'd heard of the new member to their little town. "Well it's not like she's incapable of some things right? Maybe she'll surprise you."
Natsu had no doubt Lucy could pull some amazing feats if she truly wanted to. Her stamina had increased through the winter months and continued to grow each day, but dancing was… tiring. And the thought of Lucy attempting one of Lisanna's moves only to lock her knee up made him uneasy.
"Wendy won't like it if she gets hurt." He tacked on lamely a few seconds later.
"Yeah, that's possible." Elfman agreed, before he grunted and gave Natsu another curious side eye. "... but don't you mean you won't like it?"
"Any reason why I should like a friend getting hurt?" Natsu asked, an accusation rising in his tone.
"What? No! I didn't mean it like that-"
"How did you mean it then?" Natsu asked. There was a warning in his words. He wondered if Elfman would catch it.
Elfman was not a stupid man. Sometimes the obvious was a little slow for him to catch, but he certainly was not stupid. He caught the warning easily and scratched the back of his neck to give himself time before answering. "Nothing really. Just, I haven't even met her yet and you've talked about her all day. So I figured you were a bit… attached?"
That was the cue to change topic, Natsu decided, feeling a rush of heat flare across his face. (An odd sensation for himself. Heat rarely bothered him.) He cleared his throat and shrugged. "I'm attached to everyone, no big deal." With a shrug, he pointed up the path and grinned.
"We're almost there. Bet I'll get there first!"
Elfman's jaw dropped as Natsu bolted, kicking dirt up behind his heels. "H-Hey! Natsu you can't just-. that wasn't very MANLY of you!"
Natsu answered with a cackle and the race was on.
Though there really wasn't much farther to go. Natsu's impromptu race ended almost as soon as it began, with the sounds of light drums being beat from behind Lisanna and Elfman's yurt and laughter rising into the air. The girls were having fun and Natsu's sudden skid to a halt almost had him tumbling forward, face first. Elfman was not far behind, feet pounded into the dirt, giving their arrival away, but Natsu couldn't bring himself to shout a greeting.
Lucy was … dancing? His jaw dropped. It wasn't the most graceful, nor the most complicated of dances. But the sight before him was one of the many Spring Dances. Mirajane's fingers lightly tapped against the small snare drum that usually sat inside and Lisanna, body lithe and wiry, moved to the beat seconds before Lucy followed suit. It was a moment between teacher and student with Lucy's cheeks a rosy red from exertion, eyes gleaming with an excited grin plastered on her face as she succeeded in a particular timed step earning Lisanna's praise.
"You're doing wonderful!" Lisanna's voice was breathy, revealing the length of time she spent teaching. "Just a little bit more and we'll be done." Natsu noticed the way she spun, grasping Lucy's shoulder at a particular moment to keep her weight off her healing leg, but his gaze didn't stray from Lucy's face for much longer, returning back to the curve of her lips and the joyous laugh that escaped her not a moment later.
"This is," She said between breaths, "More difficult than you make it look, Lisanna. But I think I'm getting the hang of it!" A spin that made her layered skirts twirl came next and Natsu marveled at the way Lucy looked to be glowing in that moment. What little natural light was left shone upon her as she finished with the last beat of the drum and immediately leaned against Lisanna for support.
"And… you do this every year?" She asked.
Lisanna laughed in bemusement, "More like daily for me, but those are the basic steps for one of the first dances we do during the day. The others can be… involved. And many of us practice for weeks beforehand."
"That's excluding the ones that don't have a particular dance assigned to them." Mirajane pointed out, setting the drum aside. She looked at peace with the world, watching both girls in pride. "Those can get a bit chaotic as everyone does whatever they want at any given second. We've had a few people crash into each other before…"
"I think I'll avoid those." Lucy said with a nervous laugh.
"Aw, but they can be so fun!"
Their laughter rang out once again before Lisanna's gaze finally met Natsu's, who stiffened immediately at finally being caught staring. "Oh, look who's here. It's been awhile, Natsu!"
Lucy's face turned a bright red and she stumbled back, grasping her cane tightly enough to turn her knuckles white. "H-how long has he been here?"
"Long enough to see the end of it." Elfman answered, walking past Natsu to join them. "So THIS is the Lucy I've been hearing about. You're pretty sturdy to learn to dance with that leg of yours, aren't you?"
The look he cast towards Natsu spoke volumes. Natsu had the decency to feel sheepish as he hid his face within the collar of his coat.
Lucy thanked Elfman immediately, looking his frame up and down in amazement. It was only a matter of time before she met the entirety of Mirajane's family, but she still wasn't prepared for the immense height he had against her, his shadow swallowing her whole. Not to mention that his biceps alone were larger than her head. But she stammered a greeting, cheeks flushed from the earlier exertion as she turned her embarrassed gaze to Natsu, who had yet to reveal himself from his hiding place.
Instead, he kept his attention on Lisanna, greeting her with a fanged grin and a casual wave of his hand. Lucy blinked and in that sparse second, the dancer had sprung, tackling Natsu into a hug that left the two spinning against the gravel. "I can't believe you hadn't come to see me yet!" She chided, pinching his cheeks as he whined, complaints muffled.
"Oi, I've been busy," He managed to gasp out when Lisanna slid from his arms, beaming.
"Tsk, that's a poor excuse." She wagged her finger reproachfully, side-eyeing Lucy with mirth, "Lucy's a delight, but I'm sure she's not hogging you all to herself. You should have come to see me sooner!"
He didn't want to admit that he'd missed the news of her arrival until that morning. Instead, he looked to Lucy for help, lips thinned out into the barest hint of a pout. Natsu squealed when Lucy winked.
"Nope." She said, arms crossed, "I'm not helping you get out of this, buddy."
"Lucyyy!" He whined, but she didn't budge and neither did Lisanna, who flicked his nose.
Laughter rose among them and their small meeting turned to a conversation inside the warmth of their small home; after Lucy complained of her leg throbbing from her earlier exercise, Natsu insisted she take a break. They all agreed and a small, late dinner was brought to them as they continued their visit. It had been such a long time since Natsu had spent time with all three siblings together and the chatter was full of cheer.
Lucy fell quiet through most of it, enjoying the sight of their familiar banter. She'd seen Natsu's interactions with many of the clan and it was a breath of fresh air to see him with Lisanna. Gone was his boisterous rivalry he often claimed with the rest of his friends, replaced by an obvious friendship that had sprouted through years of knowing a person. It was a side of him Lucy had hadn't seen before and she memorized each moment with the interest of a researcher uncovering a secret.
Just like the rest of the clan, they were family. Bound by blood for the siblings, yes, but as a whole something stronger held them close.
It filled her with a warm heat that swirled in the pit of her stomach with another feeling she couldn't quite identify. A hollow, empty void that swallowed the heat, consuming it until Lucy could do nothing else, but look away. It hurt. To realize, once again, what she had lost. Her new friendships were a healing balm, but this? This was growth through years of trust and time, and she…
Lucy pinched the top of her hand hard enough to bruise, wincing at the shock as it pulled her from her darker thoughts. Stop it. Don't focus on that. She thought, biting back a grimace. That's not important.
She would have to deal with these emotions: eventually, but tonight was not that moment. Forcing a smile, she continued her observations, laughing at all the right moments and allowing the warmth of their laughter to wash over her. The cracks in her heart would be soothed with time.
Patience.
That's what was needed.
Natsu, through his own boisterous laughter, teasing Lisanna and Elfman both as Mirajane laughed behind her hand, looked to Lucy curiously. Her shoulders were stiff and sharp eyes caught the sight of the red, swelling skin of her hand. As if by instinct, his hand moved, to grasp her own or regain her attention, he wasn't sure, but he paused a second later, hand retracting quickly as he was drawn back into the conversation.
'Don't touch me!'
Why couldn't he get that out of his head?
Next Update: March 23rd
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