It felt good to be doing something normal, something mundane. Lisa finished curling the strand of hair and grinned at Lyndy who loved to stand next to her while she got ready in the mornings. Lyndy, who was always interested in Lisa's hair and makeup, especially since Amy didn't wear much makeup and didn't spend much time on her hair, often found Lisa in the mornings while she was getting dressed. This morning, something that simple felt so good. Lisa spoke to Lyndy while she finished with her hair and makeup at the desk in their bedroom. Jack had been more than fine with getting rid of the old desk they'd had in the bedroom years ago, and Lisa had replaced it with one of hers from Fairfield, the beautiful wooden desk, a nice complement to the bedroom furniture suite.
"Can we make cookies today?" Lyndy asked Lisa, and Lisa grinned at her, nodding.
"I think that would be a great idea today, Lyndy," and as she answered her, she looked over to see Jack walking back into the room, now clean and dressed from his shower.
"Gigi!" Lyndy grinned at him, running over to hug him.
"Lyndy, be careful with Gigi, remember he's been hurt," Lisa called after her. Lyndy threw her arms around his middle, and Jack grunted. Lisa met his gaze, noting the pain. "Lyndy, that's too rough."
"She's okay," Jack waved his hand at her, patting Lyndy's back. He looked down at her, "Do you have to go to school?"
"It's summer, silly," she giggled. "I'm going to bake cookies with Lisa later."
Lisa smiled at her and gestured to Lyndy, "We can do that before dinner, Lyndy. Right now, since Gigi is out of the bathroom, you, Little Miss, need to go brush your teeth and get dressed for the day. Your mom said the two of you were going to go on a ride, so go get ready for that."
"Gigi, I'm going on a ride!" Lyndy jumped up and down, grinning. Jack nodded at her.
"And your horse is Harley," he looked at her.
She grinned, nodding, "I love Harley. Harley was my daddy's horse. He's mine now. Bye!" Lyndy waved and skipped out of the room, Lisa watching her, thus watching over at Jack there by the door. He gestured to the doorway.
"Ahh, Lyndy seems like she's got a lot of energy."
"Oh, she does," Lisa chuckled, nodding.
"I can step out of here if I'm bothering you or this is odd," Jack hooked his hand over his shoulder.
"No, no," Lisa shook her head. "You aren't bothering me, and it's perfectly normal we are both in the room; it's our bedroom. I was just finishing up with my hair and makeup." Jack nodded, and Lisa watched as he walked to the bed and gingerly sat down on it, his shirt on top of the bed, ready to put on over his standard undershirt. He gestured to the bed.
"Ahh, thanks for making the bed," he told her. "I would have done that."
She shook her head, "It wasn't a problem. I often make the bed because I'm usually up after you."
"Ahh, Lyndy," he gestured to the hallway where she'd just bounced out of their room, and Lisa nodded at him, waiting for the question. "I wanted to ask why she and Katie call me Gigi."
"Oh," Lisa said, crossing her leg there at the desk chair as she spoke to Jack. She smiled at the memory, "Gigi stands for great-grandpa or great-grandma. They, or really Katie, started calling you that when she was pretty little, right about when we got married. It was cute," she grinned. "I remember asking you about it because I hadn't heard it. I liked it right away. Over the years," she shrugged, "well, it's all Lyndy has ever known too, and it expanded to both of us, their Gigis, so great-grandpa or great-grandma. I've been the ahh, only female grandmother type in their life."
"I can't believe Lou and Amy have daughters," Jack sighed, sitting down, shaking his head. Lisa stayed in her chair, but she nodded, meeting his gaze.
"I really know this must be hard, Jack, but you should be very proud of the girls. They've both had to endure a lot, their share of struggles."
Jack frowned, listening and nodding. He gestured at her, "I am trying to grasp all this. It doesn't make it any less irritating, and I'm trying to understand you, that you know me so well, but I know nothing about you. Lou and Amy are so grown, and as I said, have their own girls. Amy's husband died. Her mom died. Good grief, what more for her? Lou, at least, is married-"
"Well, technically not," Lisa said grimacing, and when Jack raised his eyebrows at her, she gestured to explain. Lou and Peter divorced several years ago. They had a lot of issues, and you and I helped her with Georgie and Katie for quite some time as she was going through that divorce-"
"Who was she married to?" Jack interrupted. Lisa nodded, putting up her hand to give her a moment to explain.
"She married Peter, divorced Peter, tried dating, briefly was engaged to one of your ranch hands, Mitch, and then, she broke that off because she realized it was always Peter. They are back together, have been for a couple of years now. They made a big commitment to each other in front of all of us, and they are back together, but not married-"
"What has happened here?" Jack gestured. "That's not how she was raised-divorced, living with a man, not married," he sighed, shaking his head. Lisa pursed her lips, sighed, and she stood, walking over to where Jack had dropped his head and was clearly frustrated. She sat down next to him and looked his way until he looked at her.
"This is not a new conversation for us. You've expressed this frustration before, and at the same time, you've also said you don't want to be part of their drama-"
"No, I don't," he frowned. "I just don't think that sounds like the Lou I know."
Lisa nodded, "She's gone through a lot. Losing Marion, having Tim back, and before you go off on a rant about him, just let me talk. She has worked hard to feel good about herself. She's always been insecure about herself. Both of us see that, even though she tries to put on this brave face. She struggled with dating for a few years-"
"How did she meet Peter?"
Lisa smiled, "Ahh, through me."
"You? You've been around that long, I mean since she met Peter?"
"Long before," she smiled. "You and I met just a couple weeks after Marion died, making your memory loss right now even more frustrating. It seems like your last memory is just a few days before you and I met, and that's hard. Lou was desperately trying to find someone. She and Scott dated briefly, but that didn't end well. I mean, they are friends now, but he wasn't the one. Through a friend of a friend," Lisa grimaced, "Peter got ahold of Lou's email, and the two started talking. It's a messier story than that, but I know your head is spinning with all of these family details. Lou and Peter asked me to be Katie's godmother because I set them up. Peter is a good guy, but he is gone for work a lot. He and Lou moved to Dubai right after they got married, but that didn't last long."
"Dubai, as in the Middle East?" Jack raised an eyebrow. Lisa nodded.
"That was a huge issue for them. Peter is an oilman. Lou came home, and eventually, Peter did too. They found out they were going to have Katie then. I've mentioned Georgie is adopted."
"I will have to hear that story later," he waved his hand. "Lou married an oil guy," he sighed, trying to take it in. "Okay. I can get adopting a child, but marrying an oil guy."
"Yes," Lisa gave him a small smile. "You're very close to Georgie, but that is a story for a different time, and Peter is very kind. He's not the ranching type, but he cares a lot about you and tries to help when he's here. He loves those girls, and it's good he and Lou worked out things. Both were miserable without the other. So, yes, Lou has had a lot to deal with. Amy has too, as I told you a lot about Amy and Ty in the hospital when you asked her about her life. Jack, those girls are strong, but they've really had a rough go over the last few years. You and I have been there for them over and over, something we've both been happy to do."
"Lisa!" Lou called out from the living room, and Lisa called back to her.
"In our room, Lou," she said, and Lou appeared almost immediately, smiling at the sight of the two of them sitting there on the bed next to each other.
"Oh, hi, Grandpa, good to see you up and dressed. You're looking better. Things going well here?" Lou gestured to the two of them, giving Lisa a hopeful smile. "You're back in here-"
"Just finished getting dressed and putting on my makeup," Lisa interjected before Lou could make things uncomfortable.
"Lisa was just telling me a little about you, about Peter," Jack looked to Lou, frowning. She pursed her lips back at him, nodding.
"I love Peter very much, as I'm sure Lisa told you. You know, she is the one who set us up, sort of," Lou explained.
"You're not married to him, but you are living here?" Lisa met Lou's gaze and mouthed, 'Sorry' to her. Lou shrugged it off, giving Lisa a small smile and turned to address Jack.
"Grandpa, I know it's hard to understand, but you have to remember that I'm 42 years old now and in a good place with Peter.I expect you will respect me and my decisions. I'm mature enough to do what I feel is best. In fact," she nodded toward Lisa, "You met Lisa at the age I am now, so there's that."
Lisa smiled softly at Lou, nodding, "I suppose you're right. We did meet when I was your age."
Jack sighed, looking between the two women, and Lisa snapped out of her memories, looking to Lou.
"Lou, was there something?"
"Oh my gosh, I completely spaced. Umm, yes, actually. Peter, Katie, and I were supposed to fly to his family's reunion this weekend. I am going to just call and cancel."
"No, no, Lou," Lisa shook her head and gestured to Jack. "He's home, and you three go. I know Peter has been looking forward to it, and Katie hasn't seen her grandparents in some time. You have those plane tickets, for what, day after tomorrow? You go and enjoy. It's summer, you have been working hard, and we'll be fine here."
Lisa could feel Jack watching her as she explained things, and he looked to Lou, gesturing, "Don't stay home on my account. I'm fully capable of taking care of myself."
"Well, Lisa is here," Lou offered, "and I also just wanted to be here to help."
"Lou, go," Lisa encouraged.
"Where do Peter's parents live?"
"Winnipeg," Lou offered, meeting Lisa's gaze. "You're sure?"
"Positive," Lisa nodded. "Oh, I made oatmeal muffins."
"Oh, thanks, Lou nodded, "for all of that. I will cancel if you need me to."
"Not necessary," Lisa shook her head.
"I'm going to grab a muffin, that is if Grandpa didn't eat them all. I know they are your favorite." She smiled at Jack, and he shook his head.
"I don't remember that."
"Well, trust me when I say they are delicious, and you usually eat them all. Can I bring you one?"
"I'm fine," he waved, and Lou glanced at Lisa. Lisa gave Lou a slight nod, and Lou eyed them both again before heading to the kitchen. "Look," he said, looking down as he addressed Lisa, "I know I am frustrated, and it has to be frustrating to be around me, and I am sorry." Lisa looked over at him, nodding, but she reached to clasp his hand in hers. She held back a frown when Jack shifted, uncomfortable with that.
"I'm sorry too, I mean," she gestured at their hands, "it's hard, Jack. We've always been very close, very affectionate, and I am not trying to make you uncomfortable. I'm trying to give you space. I know you have so many questions, and that life as it is now is so far from what you remember. I can't image that. I'm trying, though, to fill in the gaps."
"The girls seem to really trust you," he told her.
She softly smiled at him, nodding. "We're family. Come on," she said reaching to pat his knee and instantly frowning at him. "Sorry, habit." She stood and gestured for him to stand. "Are you wanting to rest?"
"No, the opposite," he grumbled. "I'd like to get back to work."
"Well, since you can't, come with me. We're not leaving the ranch, but come on. We're going on a field trip, you and me."
"I don't know, Lisa," he sighed, and she nodded.
"I know you don't remember knowing me, but I certainly know this ranch and can clue you in on some of the changes. Let's go. You want to get outside, and this is the best offer you are going to get. Besides, you keep saying you don't know me, and this is a chance to do that, to ask me questions. I'm not going to give up on you, not going to let you wallow in here, so let's go." She gestured with her hand again, and Jack raised an eye to her and finally nodded, standing.
"Feisty, I see," he eyed her, and she laughed, nodding.
"You could say that," she smiled warmly at him. Instead of going out through the kitchen where some of the family had gathered, she opened their bedroom door onto the porch and stepped outside, waiting for Jack to follow. She made a face, "My it's hot out here. I think Lyndy has the right idea that she and I make cookies later, inside."
"Is that something you do often?"
Lisa nodded as Jack closed the door, following her, "Yes, I love making cookies with Katie and Lyndy. You always enjoy sampling the cookies."
He actually smiled at that, Lisa noted, nodding, "That does sound like me, I mean, I know I like cookies."
"You do," she said with a small smile, crossing her arms as they walked around to the front of the house. She wanted to reach for Jack's hand; that's how they often took walks, but Lisa knew that was much too much for Jack. As he'd said, he didn't remember her. "Ahh, let's walk over here first by the garden. You asked in the hospital what happened, and I'll show you."
Jack nodded, following her, and Lisa stopped there by the vegetable garden, nodding at it.
"I've never seen the garden look that good. Who has the green thumb?"
"Lou and I do," Lisa nodded. "We've learned a lot over the years, but she and I do a lot of the gardening. We grow a lot of carrots, some lettuce, some peppers. Most nights at dinner, we have a salad, and in the summer, at least, much of that comes from the garden. I was working here in the garden, and you were over there," she pointed to the spotlight pole. "You had a ladder up, climbed it, and you slipped. I saw all of it," she said, dropping off there at the end as she lowered her head, not wanting to make eye contact with Jack. He nodded and started to walk to the pole, looking around at the property. Since he'd not been home until late yesterday, he had not had a chance to see Heartland yet, not in its current state. Jack was quiet as he stood there, turned, and took in things.
Lisa found herself choked up there, reliving the accident, and before she could even register things, she wiped at her face, turning away, turning back to the house, wiping at it. When she had control of her feelings, she sighed and wiped her hand over her face again before turning back to Jack.
"Sorry," she waved, but noted he'd walked closer. "It was really hard to see that, to see you fall," she said, her voice hitching. "Anyway," she waved, "that doesn't help you right now."
"I'm sorry it was upsetting," he admitted, and she gave him a small smile as she nodded.
"Let's go to the barn, meet the horses, and we can go from there."
He nodded, walking alongside her as she crossed her arms again. She didn't know where to put them without reaching for Jack's hand. That's just how they normally took walks. She nodded, "The barn is somewhere I know I'll feel at home."
They reached the barn, Amy waving at them as she and Lyndy started off on their ride, ahead of where they were. Lisa gestured to them, "Amy's horse, Spartan, and Lyndy there on Harley." Jack watched as Lyndy rode, and he shook his head.
"She looks a lot like Amy at that age," he sighed. "That's a big horse for her."
Lisa nodded, "You thought so back when she was four, when she really started on Harley." Jack turned to her, mouth almost dropped open.
"She started on that horse when she was four?"
Lisa nodded, letting a grimace escape from her lips, "You were worried about her then too. Yes, that was after Ty died. Amy didn't work or push things at all with Lyndy for almost a year, but when she started to get back to work herself, she wanted Lyndy to ride Harley. It took some time," Lisa nodded, "but as you see, she's a great rider."
Jack just nodded, the couple reaching the barn. Lisa nodded inside, "You ready to meet your horse?"
"I suppose," he sighed. "This entire mess, everyone is new, including my horse. Why does everything have to change? It seems like it was just Marion, Lou, and Amy with me just yesterday."
Lisa dropped her head slightly and pursed her lips, making eye contact with him finally when she looked up, "You know things can't stay the same forever. Yes, you hate change. I know that, but it's been almost 18 years, Jack, 18 years of memory you don't have right now. That's huge. Let's meet Blue. As the doctor said, you never know what might help your memory. Come on."
Lisa led Jack into the barn. He was quiet as he took in things, nodding to himself at some things looking very similar. He stopped and looked at the tack hanging on the wall, gesturing to it.
"I used to spend hours on this, trying to get it all in order. Amy do this? Looks really good?"
Lisa nodded, "She runs the barn mostly, just how things have fallen into place." She gestured to the saddle area. "You still have the same saddle."
Jack walked to the saddles, instantly pointing at his, "This is my saddle." Lisa nodded, stepping toward him as she met his gaze.
"That is your saddle, yes."
"Looks good and worn, but I'd not get a new one at this point."
Lisa held back a laugh, and when he looked at her, she waved at him, "Sorry. You just don't know that your saddle was a point of contention with us." Jack raised an eyebrow, and she explained, "Early on, when we had been dating oh, about a year, I came along on the spring cattle drive. I bought you a new saddle because you'd been complaining for months about your arthritis. It was a fabulous saddle, but you just hated the extra padding and comfort with it, claiming that everyone was making fun of you on that saddle. I think you said it was riding around on a couch. Anyway," she waved again, a small smile, "needless to say, after the cattle drive, I put the saddle out of its misery."
Jack eyed her again, gesturing to the saddles, "So, which one is it?"
"Oh, long gone," she waved her hand. "Actually, it's at Fairfield, the stable I own. It is a beautiful saddle, and I have kept it there all these years. My trainer, Harry, he used it some before he retired, but it's there."
Jack nodded, and Lisa could almost feel Jack sizing her up as he gestured, "You went on a cattle drive? Those are wet, cold, uncomfortable, and nothing like some fancy horse breeder would like."
She sighed loudly, frowning at him, "You know, I realize you don't know me, but trust yourself a little to realize that there have to be some redeeming qualities in me that you obviously fell in love with. You continually just refer to me as a fancy horse breeder. I'm much more than that. I'm really trying, Jack, and I wish you would try to get to know me. I'm telling you story after story about your life, your grandkids, great grandkids, even your horse and saddle. I just," she paused and shook her head, turning around slightly in the barn. She saw Duke and walked to him where she started to pet him.
"Is that Duke, I presume?" Jack asked finally, giving Lisa a nod. She nodded but remained quiet. "I'm guessing one of these saddles is yours?" He studied the saddles, finally pointing to one and as he met Lisa's gaze, "This one?"
"Yes," she said through gritted teeth. "That is my saddle. It's smaller for my frame and housed lower on the wall so I can reach it. Lyndy's is the only one below mine, but she can't lift it yet. You bought me that saddle."
He nodded, looking it over, "Good looking saddle. So," he grimaced, "I bought you a saddle you kept, but I didn't want one you bought?"
"Yes, that's how it's played out," she said, now flashing a fake smile at him. "Such a charmer, as you can see why I've stayed around. Gosh, I must love you to put up with that." Lisa could tell that saying she loved him made Jack slightly uncomfortable in his current state, not that someone finding out he had a wife wouldn't assume she loved him, but Lisa just shook her head and grew quiet. Finally, after Jack had wandered around, looking over the current setup, she gestured to Blue, patiently waiting for attention from his owner.
"This is Blue," she said, reaching up to pet him too. She gestured to Jack, "He really misses you." Jack looked him over and stepped toward Blue. Lisa moved out of the way so Jack could meet his horse. While he was busy there, Lisa stepped into the office, giving it a look to see if there was anything specific she needed to point out to Jack. Less than a minute later, she felt his presence behind her and turned to see he was in the doorway taking in the office.
"This place sure looks different, clean, organized, and there are more pictures on the walls," he said, stepping to the wall to take in the pictures. Lisa followed his gaze, noting that this was actually a good spot for him to see the last 18 years of the family on their horses. She walked up and crossed her arms as he started to look at the array of photos, pointing out several things.
"Amy here, winning the Fall Finale shortly after Marion died," Lisa pointed to that old picture of her. Jack glanced at Lisa.
"She won that year? She'd barely been doing anything with jumps before that."
Lisa grinned and nodded, "She won, and oh, you were so proud. You couldn't stop smiling and telling everyone about the event."
He gestured between them, "So, we knew each other then?"
"We did," Lisa smiled as she continued to nod. "We'd been dating a couple months at that point. I really did meet you right after Marion died, and I really wish I could have met her. You had a party here at the house after Amy won, and I came. I'd been over to the house plenty those months and had become friends with the girls too. You were really proud that night. Ahh," she said, pausing and that had Jack glance over at her as Lisa looked to the ground, "that was the first time I met Tim. He came to the party, invited by the girls. It was also the first time you allowed him back in the house. You really put aside your thoughts for the girls because they were trying so hard. Jack, you have been trying with Tim since then because of the girls. So, I've been here. I've seen it all these last years, all the effort, all the pain. Reconciling with Tim has not been easy or a quick process, but I have personally listened to all of your thoughts, complaints, and struggles. When you want to talk about him, I'm here."
He sighed, shaking his head as he met her gaze, "I'm not ready to talk. I think I'd just like to brush out Blue, get to know him."
"Okay," she nodded, gesturing to Duke's stall. "While you brush out Blue, I'm going to brush out Duke, and then, maybe we can take a walk around the barn before we head back to the house."
"What I'd really like to do is go for a ride," Jack gestured, but when he made eye contact with Lisa, he frowned, "Fine." Before he stepped away from the pictures, he paused and looked at a grouping of them, pointing to one. Lisa stepped closer to Jack to see what it was.
"How in the world did you get me to put on that getup and ride on an English saddle?" Lisa smiled warmly with a slight chuckle as she turned to look at Jack.
"I didn't." He gestured again, and she nodded to explain, "I didn't get you to dress up Iike that. You did it on your own to surprise me, to make me happy. I was running a fox hunt through the hunt club," she leaned her head toward him, "just no fox to actually hunt. I had spoken to you about it, even knew you wouldn't go with me, and I was okay with that. Well," she gestured with her hand, "the day of the hunt, you surprised me. You borrowed and bought different parts of the outfit, and well, we ended up riding together, you and me. It even started snowing, as you can see from that picture," she smiled. Lisa met his gaze, "It was a really nice day, and I cherish times like that with you. I really appreciated your effort, and honestly, you had a nice time that day."
Jack studied her; she could feel him looking at her, almost looking through her as she finished telling him about that day. He nodded, looking back to the various pictures of everyone in the family with their horses and glanced back at Lisa, "You're telling me I willingly did that, me?"
Lisa pursed her lips a, nodding, "Yes, as I said, you did it to make me happy, to do something I enjoyed, all because for all these years, you have really, really loved me."