A/N: Ok, I accidentally wrote a brand new chapter (as in not in the original story) Something that i had noticed when I re-read the original months ago was how Harry got to the new hospital and who was paying. And at the time I had known in my head but never put it in the story cause im an idiot. I've been having trouble coming up with a way to include it in the story thinking it would have to be a short summary piece at the end but this opportunity popped up and here it is.
Thank you all who have read and reviewed. Im glad you are enjoying the story and hope you continue to. There's still quite a bit to go and I've planned to expand the story to be longer past the original chapters as I feel the original ending felt kinda blank. So thank you for sticking with me.
Chapter 19:
To say the wizarding world had lost its mind over the news from the Daily Prophet that their savior Harry Potter had been found would be an understatement. There was no possible way to avoid overhearing conversations all around as one walked down a street, went into a shop, worked their jobs as witches and wizards all over Brittan discussed the mystery that was Harry Potter and the mysterious girl who may or may not be his child. The consensus was the girl indeed was the young progeny of Potter based on her appearance, which of course brought on even further discussion of who the woman was who bore their savior's child.
At the focus of this news was the Weasleys. Every one of them had been accosted by others demanding information and scolding them for keeping the news to themselves. As a united front, none of them had given any comment, even Percy much to their relief, insisting on the privacy of their wayward family member.
Ginny had hidden in her apartment for the past two days after the article came out. She had woken up late that morning and made herself a strong cup of coffee, drinking the first cup quickly before opening her front door to grab the prophet as she had done every morning since moving into the apartment above her brother's shop. She was surprised to see it wasn't there but shrugged it off. George was the one who normally placed the paper there for her and she figured he must have gotten waylaid somehow.
She decided to make herself breakfast before venturing downstairs to locate it. There was supposed to be an article in the sports section that the team captain had participated in that she was interested in reading. Leisurely breakfast done Ginny headed out the door, locking it behind her and headed down the back stairs that led to the employee store room.
Normally there were loud sounds that would greet her as she descended the stairs of children playing with the test products or her brother working on a new one. This morning however it was silent which was normally cause for alarm in her family. Quickly skipping the last few steps, she opened the door at the bottom, startled to see George standing there in the back with Angelina. The two of them had been talking quietly to each other but stopped immediately at seeing Ginny.
"What's wrong?" Ginny asked immediately, not used to seeing Angelina at the shop. The married couple each glanced at each other before turning back to her. Immediately Ginny knew something had happened.
"It's Harry, Ginny." George started. Immediately her heart seemed to stop as the breath was knocked out of her while all manner of things ran through her head. Each scenario worse than the last one.
"What about him? Is he okay?" She asked, alarmed. "Is it Evelyn?"
"No, Evelyn's fine, Harrys, I don't know how he is. Look Ginny, Harry's been found." He told her.
Ginny furrowed her brow in confusion. "What do you mean found?"
"Well, I'd show you, but Ron took your copy of the Prophet and I left mine at home."
"Harry was in the Prophet?"
"Him and Evelyn. They found him Ginny."
Her gut twisted, panic setting in, questions flung through her mind. How did they find him? Who told them? What will Harry do? Her body turned cold as if her veins turned to ice. What if he ran? She had just gotten him back. The wound that had been on her heart after he left in the first place had been ripped open at his return, finally beginning to heal instead of just being scabbed over. If he took off again, she wasn't sure if it would heal as a scab again or just forever be a gaping wound in her chest.
"I have to go to him." She said immediately, heading for the front of the store where the fireplace was. She would floo over to Ron's then apparate to Harrys and pray he was still there. She walked past George but was stopped by his grabbing onto her arm. "Let go of me George, I need to get to Harry's!"
"Ron is there."
"I don't care. Let me go!"
"Ginny stop. Let Ron and Hermione take care of this. They're the ones who found him. Let them try to calm him. I don't think it would be a great idea for you to go over."
"And why not? I could stop him. He loves me. He told me so. And I love him." She ground out angrily, still trying to get her brother to let go of her. She began reaching for her wand, ready to hex the crap out of him when it was snatched out of her hand immediately by Angelina. She glared at her sister-in-law angrily in betrayal for a moment before her brother used both hands to wrestle her into a nearby chair. She sat down upon it in a huff, still glaring at the two of them.
George knelt down in front of her, and she thought about punching him in the face but paused that thought as he grasped her hands in his. "I know you two love each other and that's exactly why you should let Ron and Hermione handle this."
"That doesn't even make sense."
"It does Ginny. Think. Harry's world is about to be turned upside down. He's hidden from the entire wizarding world for years and it's about to rear its ugly head up in his business faster and harder than you can say bludger."
"Which is exactly why I need to be with him." She argued as George just shook his head.
"You're right yes but Harry's probably not going to be in the right frame of mind when he finds out and will probably say or do things he won't mean that he can't take back."
"George-"
"We've all watched you muddle your way through life since he left, and you've finally come back to life Ginny. Let Ron and Hermione deal with it. Let them handle whatever freakout and anger he'll probably throw. Once he's wadded through the initial shock, I have no doubt that he'll come to you and need you."
Ginny stared at her brother, tears welling in her eyes as she took a deep calming breath. He was right, she knew it. As close as she felt she was to Harry, their relationship was still very rocky. Harry wouldn't fully commit to her until he made sure she was aware of everything he had been through during his time away. It frustrated her, wanting to put it all behind them, but she understood his reasoning and would wait.
George was right though. It was through Harry's telling so far of his time in the hospital that Ginny fully could appreciate how damaged Harry had been. How unstable he was then. Though he seemed much stable now, she couldn't deny the cracks that were still there, especially when emotions were involved. She, and the other Weasley's had witnessed his power firsthand when he became upset. And so, George was right. Harry would undoubtedly panic and lash out at whoever was nearby. And while Ginny was sure she would be able to get over whatever it is he'd shout at her, she knew that somewhere in her mind and soul she would always question if he meant what he said and did.
"When did you get so wise?" She huffed, sitting back in the chair annoyed. George, to his credit, didn't respond. He just stood up with a smirk.
The silence that had descended the three of them was broken by the roar of the fireplace. As only specific people were keyed into it, none of them were concerned as they waited for the person to appear. After a few beats the green flames disintegrated and the tall, graceful form of Draco Malfoy stepped out.
"Malfoy." George said curtly. Draco tilted his head slightly in acknowledgement before turning his gaze to Ginny.
"I take it you've read the paper." She said simply. "Yes, it's true."
"I see." Was all the blonde said as he glanced once again to the other two.
George backed away from Ginny and grabbed Angelina's hand, tugging her toward the door leading to the front of the store. "We'll leave you two alone to talk." He said as he opened the door, pausing for just a beat before shutting it again. "Actually, why don't you two go away and we'll hide here."
Draco smirked at her brother. "You can't hide forever, Weasley. You'll continue to be hounded until you say something."
"Or, and hear me out. I don't say anything, they get the hint, and they go away." Her brother countered.
"That will work too but will probably take longer." Draco said. "But it's your choice."
Ginny stood up then, heading towards the stairs that led to her apartment, hearing Draco following her. Once safely ensconced once again in the safety of her own home, she collapsed onto the sofa and hid her face in the palms of her hands, taking deep breaths to calm herself. It would not do to cry like a baby in front of Draco Malfoy.
"I take it Potter was the one that Granger was setting you up with?" He asked her.
Ginny lowered her hands and looked up at the blonde who still stood a few feet away, trying to gauge his reaction to the news. To figure out what he was thinking or feeling about it. But as always, Draco Malfoy wore no expression upon his pale face nor gave any indication of his thoughts or feelings on the matter, having mastered schooling his appearance at a young age.
"Yes. But you already knew that didn't you?" She said simply, not expecting an answer.
Draco didn't disappoint as he simply sat in the armchair near the couch. He sat back in it, crossing one leg over the other, looking for all the world with bored indifference, but she knew better. She knew differently. She had been friends with him long enough to know his intent and was grateful for her friendship with him.
"You should have seen his expression when I told him we were friends." She laughed, looking away. "He couldn't believe it. He kept repeating your name then saying 'no' to my 'yes'. It was great fun. Even more so when Ron and Hermione confirmed it."
"I figured you'd be over there with him when he found out."
"I want to be. I wanted to go." She said, "But George had just talked me out of it when you showed up. He doesn't want me to be in the crosshairs if Harry lashes out."
They sat in companionable silence for a few moments, allowing Ginny to gather her thoughts. She wished she knew how Harry was handling the news. She had no doubt that it would be Ron and Hermione to break the news to him. Harry no longer had an owl and had admitted to staying away from the wizarding world, so he probably didn't get The Daily Prophet.
Ginny was startled out of her own reverie when a cup was placed on the coffee table in front of her. She stared at it for a moment before looking over to watch as Draco sat back in the armchair. She had been so lost in her own thoughts she didn't even notice he had gotten up.
"Thank you." She said softly, picking up the cup and taking a drink.
He took a drink of his own. "Your brother was right to keep you here. I've no doubt Potter will need you once the initial shock wears off."
Ginny just nodded and put her cup down once more. "I hope so." She whispered. "I honestly don't know what I'll do if he takes off again. I don't believe my heart can take that kind of pain again. I hate that he has so much power over me and I feel as if I have none over him."
"You did once though. It's why he begged you to let him go in the first place." Draco pointed out.
"Yes, but that was before Evelyn." She said, noticing he didn't show anything, any confusion or understanding or any emotion at all to the girl's name, once again making her feel like he somehow already knew about Harry.
"I don't believe it's a competition, Ginny. Without having spent any time with Potter I can't say for certain, but I'm sure you have just as much power over his heart as he does yours. The only difference is Potter has a greater motivation that could lead to yours being smashed into bits."
"What do you mean?" She asked, confused.
"I'm talking about his daughter." He said simply. "You have power over his heart too, but if he's a good, proper father, he will always act in the best interest to her, regardless of either his or your hearts."
Ginny understood. It was what George had tried talking to her about, what she had already spoken to with Harry. Evelyn and Harry were a packaged deal now, and Ginny knew and accepted that Evelyn would always come first and foremost. She hated how it made her feel pushed aside at times, feeling like she got cheated out of her time with Harry. Out of the time in their lives where she would have been the priority until their children would come along.
But she couldn't deny that she adored Evelyn. Though the little girl had been frequently antagonistic towards Ginny, she couldn't deny that Evelyn was a sweet girl and Ginny loved that the girl brought so much joy and happiness to Harry. He deserved all the happiness in the world, having only captured brief pieces of it in his life since his parents were ripped away from him, leaving him abandoned at the abusive hands of the Dursleys.
However, she understood what Draco was telling her. Being with Harry was a risk to her heart, one that she was willing to take. She just hoped that Harry understood that as well.
She looked over towards Draco again, watching him as he stared off into space. She took a moment to reflect on him as well. His father had ended up in Azkaban after the war, died there five years later, leaving Draco the Malfoy head. It was with testimony from Harry that Draco and his mother Narcissa were released and not sentenced. The court found them to be, while not innocent, at minimum, not at fault. Finding them only as following Lucius Malfoys', the head of the family's will. That their simple actions of not confirming his identity at Malfoy Manor and lying to Voldemort as he lay on the ground in the Forbidden Forest, supposedly dead, had saved their hides from Azkaban.
The family had been in ruins after the war, with the Ministry enforcing heavy fines and confiscating on them. It was only with the luck that despite how sleezy the man was, Lucius Malfoy had genuinely been good at business and investments that kept the boy before her and his mother in the manner of which they were accustomed to living.
"I'm going to ask you something. And I want you to answer honestly." Ginny started, gaining the blonde man's attention. From the way he watched her, she knew that he had a good idea of what she was going to ask him.
"I'll try." He replied. She gave him a hard look.
"This is important, Draco. Perhaps the most important thing I'll ever ask you." The two of them stared at each other unblinking for a few moments, before he gave a slight nod of his head, indicating he understood. "Did you already know where Harry was?"
"Yes." He said simply.
Ginny let out the breath she wasn't aware she was holding. Her mind went blank, all the questions she'd been thinking of flew out of her head as she once again placed her face in her palms. "How long?" She asked, dropping them again to look at him. She wanted it to be glare but she couldn't seem to muster one as she stared at him. "How long have you known?"
"I can't te-"
"Don't you dare say you can't tell me." She cried out. His jaw clenched.
"I'll tell you. But only if you swear to keep it to yourself. You can't tell anyone. Especially Potter."
She gasped at him incredulously. This man, who had become a very good friend of hers since the end of the war, who was there in the fall out of Harry's abandonment dared to have the audacity to demand a vow of secrecy from her. Anger coursed through her. She wanted to lash out at him, hex him into next week. To remind him why people avoided getting on her bad side. But she knew that wouldn't do her any good. She still wouldn't have the information. No matter what she did to him, Draco would keep it to himself until she swore not to tell.
"Fine. I won't tell anyone." She ground out.
Draco nodded and placed his cup on the end table next to him. "You swear on everything. That you will not share this information with anyone. Not your family, not your friends, and especially not Potter himself."
"Yes, I Ginny Weasley hereby swear to keep whatever you Draco Malfoy here tells me to myself and never tell a single soul so help me Merlin." She said angrily, picking up her own mug only to put it back on the table a half second later. "Are you wanting an unbreakable vow now or something?"
"No, nothing that dire." He replied lazily, though Ginny could see his body taut with tension.
"Alright then. Tell me. How long have you known?"
"Since a week or two before Christmas the year that he disappeared."
Ginny's jaw dropped as all the air in her lungs seemed to vanquish. Whatever she had been expecting the answer to be, it was not that. He had known where Harry was while still at school, convincing her to go home to her family for Christmas. He had known during all those study sessions together, all those talks, walks, parties, everything she had ever done with him he had known.
And he never said a thing. Despite knowing how torn she was.
"Why?" She whispered. "Why didn't you say anything?"
"I couldn't."
"Bullshit."
"It's not Ginny." He argued adamantly. "You didn't see him-"
"Of course not, I didn't know where he was, but you did!"
"And I'm glad you didn't! Damn it, Ginny. He was literally on death's door again when we found him. At his own hands this time!" He paused, considering his words. "I had grown close to you over the autumn, I saw what his abandonment had done to you. You had become my friend."
Ginny chuckled as she wiped a tear away. "That may be the first time you admitted that."
"Its true Ginny. But seeing him like that, it was hard, for both my mother and me. And if it was hard for us, I couldn't imagine what it would be like for you."
"You were the one who had him transferred, weren't you?" She asked him, enjoying seeing the shock on his own face at her knowing something already.
"How-"
"Harry told me was in a county hospital and then transferred to a private institution. Later his doctor informed him of having a benefactor who was paying for his stay."
"I had to. After we found him, we couldn't just leave him there. The hospital he was in was just a regular hospital with what they called a 'psych ward'. It wasn't a bad place, it was sanitary, and the patients locked in there looked alright, but it was overcrowded and short staffed. When we found him, they had him in an open room with at least ten other beds with people in them. They had him strapped to one, his arms heavily bandaged. He looked dirty and thin and was drugged up with all sorts of what they called 'medication' that he didn't even recognize or acknowledge anything around him."
Ginny closed her eyes at the description, knowing exactly why. It was just after he had attempted to take his own life. Her stomach churned, feeling ill. "How were you able to locate him?" She asked softly.
"Kreacher. Potter still had him at Hogwarts. It came to me one day as I went to the kitchen for some coffee and saw him. A family's house elf can always find their masters. They're linked by magic. It took some convincing, but I was able to get him to agree to find him. Two days later, Kreacher came to me with Potter's location. The next day I left the school to speak to my mother and we went to the location."
"Kreacher." Ginny laughed, though the situation wasn't remotely funny. Nobody had thought about asking him. Nobody had even thought of the elf at all. Harry had ordered him to remain at Hogwarts, taking up the lead of the house elves under McGonagall's supervision. "You came back though. You were on the train with me on the way home for Christmas."
"Yes, after we made sure he would be safe for a few days we had left him there, with a few charms on the muggles to take extra care of him while we put some things in motion. My mother had been friends with a Ravenclaw muggleborn in school who had a half-brother that mother remembered hearing was a doctor of some sort, specializing in the mind.
"While I went back to school my mother tracked down this doctor and made arrangements. Luckily the man worked at some kind of asylum a few cities over. After the train pulled up to London, we immediately went back to the hospital to collect Potter and move him to this facility. We had discussed just wiping his existence from the hospital but we didn't know who also knew of his whereabouts, so we placed some pretty strong charms to cover our tracks, saying he was transferred due to overcrowding."
"The ministry." She said, interrupting him. "The ministry knew where he was. Percy told us last week. They knew he was in that hospital, and that he was moved. They lost track of him after he left the new place though."
"We figured they may have known."
"That letter." She started, brow furrowed. "I received a letter from Harry that Christmas. But he told me he didn't send it, he couldn't."
"I sent it." Draco informed her. "Though we doubted he had anything that could compromise the secrecy of the wizarding world, especially since he had been in that hospital for a couple months already, we had to be sure. It was in his possessions. I didn't know what it said, I couldn't bring myself to open it. I thought about burning it, but I couldn't do that either."
"So you sent it to me."
Draco nodded but said nothing else. Tears fell freely from her eyes as a comfortable silence spread between them. She stood up from her spot and headed towards her bedroom without a word, and headed straight to the cabinet that held her prized possession. Or more accurately, Harry's prized possessions she had been keeping safe for Harry. Unlocking it she reached in, her fingers gracing the soft fabric of the invisibility cloak as it did each time she opened it, before reaching for the letter underneath it that she had received that Christmas.
As she walked back out to the front room, she opened it, glancing at the words herself before reading them out loud.
"Dear Ginny,
I don't know what to write other than I'm sorry. I hope that someday you will be able to forgive me for what I've done. I hope you are well and that you are happy. I will always love you.
Harry"
She handed the letter to Draco who took it from her and read it several times for himself as she sat back down on the couch. She watched him for any indication of what he could be thinking but as always, Draco was a closed book. Finally, after several minutes he folded it back up and handed it to her.
"Well, that's worse than I thought." He said.
"How so?"
He stared at her for a moment before asking "How much has he told you about his stay in the hospital?"
She thought back to Harry's story. "Quite a lot. I've…I've seen his scars, on his arms." Draco nodded, understanding.
"Despite being the one to arrange and pay for his treatment, my mother and I have always respected his privacy in regards to his treatments. However, we have come by from time to time to check and make sure the muggles were treating him well."
"You found out he's tried to end his life on more than one occasion." She finished for him.
"Yes. But from what we've were able to figure out he wasn't fully conscious of what he was doing. Hell, he was practically catatonic. But this letter, I don't know."
"What are you talking about?"
"Just that, at least the first time, he knew what he was doing." He said. He sat back in the armchair again, once again crossing one leg over the other. "That letter would indicate that at least the first attempt was premeditated."
Ginny's eyes slammed shut as if she were slapped. She didn't want to know that. She didn't want to think about that. Opening her eyes again she unfolded the letter and read it once more, her mind trying to find fault in his deduction but found none there. She cleared her throat as she set the letter down. She felt exhausted. The idea of crawling back into bed and doing nothing until she heard word of Harry sounded like a wonderful idea at the moment.
"I take it no one else knew that you had found him?"
"No. We rarely ever spoke of it. It was paid through one of our muggle investments. I suspect Aunt Andromeda may have an idea if Potter mentioned anything about his doctor and his knowledge of the wizarding world to her as she too knew the man's sister and may think it too strong a coincidence, but other than that. No."
Ginny nodded, grateful. "Did you know about Evelyn?"
"I knew he had a child. But that was all."
"I see. One last question then." She looked directly at him again. "Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why did you help him?"
Draco was silent for a few moments as Ginny stared him down. She couldn't fathom why the man sitting before her would go to such lengths to help Harry. Someone he had openly loathed since the day they met on the train to Hogwarts. The two of them had had a rivalry that was still to this day discussed by the students of Hogwarts. Why would this man go out of his way to help Harry?
"I helped him because we owe it to him." Draco answered. "And not just my mother and I. Potter did save my life during the battle, and he did save the both of us from Azkaban after. But it's not just us. The whole of the wizarding world owes him. Twice he did the impossible, he saved us all from the destruction of The Dark Lord. Potter literally died for us. My mother saw him get his square in the chest with the killing curse. He had walked into that forest, with his wand away knowing full well that he was going to die. He gave his life to fight and destroy our demons. What's a few galleons to help him fight his."
Ginny wiped away the tears on her cheeks and gave a nod of agreement. They did owe him. Everyone did. However, it was a debt that Harry would never collect. It always amazed her the size of his heart and his sense of what was right. For someone who had entered into her world as a damaged boy, torn to pieces by the abuse of his relatives, Harry had turned out to be a kind and loving person. For someone who had spent the ten years of his most formative years as a person who was loathed, isolated, friendless, and unloved, for someone who had been nothing but ridiculed, beaten down, both literally and figuratively, and treated worse than a leaper in ancient times, he had somehow been able to love and find friendship.
"Okay, maybe more than a few gallons." Draco said, breaking her out of her thoughts. "Muggle medicine is ridiculously expensive. Like, really ridiculously."
Ginny snorted.
"I probably could buy an entire island somewhere for the price of this 'therapy'."
That did it for Ginny as she burst out laughing. And not just a little laugh but a full on body laugh that left tears streaming down her face. She could hear Draco joining a few moments later as she threw her head back against the couch and tried to breathe. This went on for several minutes until they were both able to pull themselves together again.
"Oh, that felt good." she commented. "I can't remember the last time I laughed that hard."
"I don't think I have ever laughed that hard."
Ginny looked over at him and smirked seeing his face red and his own face streaked with tears of laughter. "Thank you." She said earnestly.
"You're welcome."
"Not just for this. For coming over, for making me laugh. I mean thank you for being there, and helping Harry when the rest of us couldn't reach him."
"I don't need thanks for that Ginny."
"I know, but, you have it anyways." Silence once again descended the two of them for a few minutes before a thought jumped into her head. "Okay, so that's one mystery down, but there's still another."
"And what would that be?" He asked, amused.
Ginny sat up and leaned towards him, "How the hell did Luna Lovegood find him?"
Draco gave an ungentlemanly snort "Maybe those snortled back whatever's told her."
(*(*(*(*(*(*(*(*(*
Harry quickly headed back to his classroom to grab his things as the last of the students were picked up. It had been his day to supervise the arrival of parents and collecting of the students after school. Normally he enjoyed those days, it gave him a few minutes to catch up with the parents, letting them know how their children are doing in school. Maybe unofficially advise them of any small issues. Today however, he just found it long and annoying as it seemed everyone wanted to talk to him about something.
On top of all that Harry swore he kept seeing people in strange outfits peeking into his classroom windows or watching him from just beyond the school grounds as he supervised various recesses and now the departure of students. He wanted to believe it was just his being paranoid, but Harry knew better. He knew that it was most likely reporters, sent to track and report his movements. This thought was backed up as he was pretty sure he saw a fake blond with large glasses that looked like Rita Skeeter. Idly he debated as he stacked up his students' art projects into a neat pile if he should renew his subscription to The Daily Prophet so he could see what was being said, but he decided against that. Ignorance was bliss. The past few years of being out of the wizarding community had taught him that.
Satisfied with the level of cleanliness of his classroom, Harry quickly grabbed his bag, pulling his wand out of the side pocket and cast a strong 'notice-me-not' charm upon himself and left the room. Nobody bothered or acknowledged his presence as he made his way to the office to sign out and head home, seeing what was obviously a witch as he pulled out of the parking lot and onto the street.
A few moments later saw him arrive home and immediately apparate once inside his garage to the edge of Andromeda's property and canceling his charm. He looked around the surrounding area before heading towards the door, satisfied that nobody else was around. Like most wizards Andromeda lived further out away from muggles.
"Harry, I thought I'd be seeing you today." Andromeda greeted as she opened the door.
"Did you?"
"Well, yes. I knew the Weasleys would flock to you once they read the paper." She explained as they sat in the living room. Harry wasn't surprised to see she already had a tea service ready to go for when he arrived.
"Yes, Ron and Hermione showed up this morning at 6:30. I had literally woken up. I must admit it was not the best start to the day."
"I can imagine. Were you this calm when they told you?" She asked him.
Harry chuckled. "Honestly, I don't feel calm right now. I feel like all my nerves are firing all at once and my stomach is so twisted I may vomit." He explained, taking a sip of his tea, tasting ginger. He resisted rolling his eyes, she knew him quite well.
"I'd be lying to you if I didn't say I feared you would immediately take off. I've kept myself busy today between Teddy's schooling on coming up with what to say to him if you did."
Harry grimaced at that and hated that he had put her into such a state. Andromeda Tonks was a strong woman, raised as a noble woman as a member of the House of Black. She was not so easily rattled but when it came to her grandson, all bets were off. The young boy had the power to topple her most stoic mannerisms.
"I admit, I did immediately begin packing up the house. But Ron stopped me and made me see reason." He took another drink as his stomach twisted again. "I had yelled at them for coming back into my life, and I blamed them for bringing this. They knew I didn't mean it, but the thought still runs in my head."
"Of course it is Harry." She said and he looked at her in surprise. "That thought will probably always run through your mind in some form or another."
"But I don't want it to. I'm grateful they're back. I missed them so much." He argued.
"I don't doubt that, Harry. And I don't doubt that they know that too. That family is full of smart people who love you. I fully believe that they know that they weren't what you were hiding from, that you didn't stay away because of them. But because of what they would bring."
"The wizarding world." He said.
"Exactly."
He thought about that as he drank more of his tea. The wizarding world filled him with dread. He couldn't deny that he was grateful for it in some ways, it did save him from what would have been a disaster of a life if he had been a muggle. He had seen firsthand in the hospital the possible outcome of those who suffered severe abuses as children. The trauma of it caused mental anguish leading to horrible outcomes as those who suffered it tried to cope or were just completely broken.. As traumatizing as the war had been, Harry was well aware that his own descent into madness was most likely exacerbated by the years of abuse heaped upon him by his relatives. He had felt himself slipping long before the war as one thing after another piled on top of him. He hadn't had any coping skills, at least any healthy ones.
Sadly, psychiatry wasn't a thing in the wizarding world Harry found out. There were mind healers, yes, but it was a different thing. It was more to do with magic than the workings of the mind. It had made him wonder quite a bit how the wizarding world dealt with things. Obviously not well considering how many damaged people he had met through his years as a participant.
"Why didn't you tell me there was a stigma on having a child out of wedlock?" He asked her, changing the subject.
Andromeda startled at the question, eyes widening and meeting his. They sat like that for a few beats before she sighed and placed her cup back onto the table. "It didn't seem important at the time Harry."
"How could it not be important to tell me an entire society would think her to be something to be ashamed about?"
She stared at him for a few more moments, the intensity boring down on him as she thought of what to say. It was something he had always appreciated about her. She was honest, spoke her mind, but was always mindful of the delivery, saying precisely what needed to be said without interpretation.
"Harry, when you came to me after over a year of disappearing off the face of the earth do you know what I saw?"
"A little boy who ran from his responsibilities wanting to play godfather?" He answered. He knew that's not what she saw, but it had always been how he felt.
"No. I saw a young man that was beaten down until he was nothing but broken, torn to pieces, and shattered into glass, but somehow had started to put himself back together again." She told him.
Harry felt his eyes sting and clenched his jaw as his mind remembered and replayed the memory of his showing up at her doorstep one day. He was still broken, still severely underweight with dark shadows and a haunted demeanor. But he had to see Teddy. He had to make sure he was alright. That the sister of Bellatrix Lestrange was caring for the boy, was loving him and treated him well. It had made him sick that he hadn't checked before then. He had been so self-absorbed in his own issues that he had neglected Teddy.
"I watched you get better, each time you came over you were better. And then you disappeared again, you broke again. And yet a few months later you show up, broken and shallow but had started pulling yourself together again. When you told me that you were going to come back to your family in the autumn, I was very happy for you. I could see the fear you had, you were scared to death but there was an excitement in your eyes, a longing to be reunited.
"But then you told me that Andrea was pregnant, and I saw in your eyes such sadness and loss and I knew you weren't coming back. After Remus came to his senses after you yelled at him there was such joy in him. In both him and my Nymphadora. It was as if the sun rose and set with the bundle that was growing inside her. But with you it was different. You shut the door on the past and moved forward with the motions of having a child."
Harry shook his head. "I don't regret Evelyn being born. Not for a second." It was the truth. No matter what the situation of her conception and birth he had never regretted her. Other than that brief moment right after Andrea had told him she was pregnant and his mind immediately thought 'oh merlin what the fuck did I do', every thought and feeling after was directed towards being the best father he could and making sure his child was loved and happy.
"I know you don't Harry. It's clear to anyone who has seen you how much you love that girl. And I admire how hard you tried to make it work with Andrea, even after things started to go bad. I didn't tell you then because of that. I was planning on telling you sometime, if it came up, but you had been determined to stay in the muggle world with this muggle girl and you were having troubles with her, and it just didn't seem important to tell you then.
"And then you showed up in the middle of the night with Evelyn and confessed everything that had been happening with Andrea and you moved in with us for a while. I would have told you then, I should have but you were finishing school, finding a job, looking for a house, all in the muggle world. You never once mentioned the wizarding world, focused solely on the muggle. Even when I'd bring something up or mention the Weasleys or anything you would just give a small smile and continue on.
"So, in short, I never told you, because it seemed irrelevant. You were determined to stay in the muggle world."
He couldn't deny that she had a point there. After learning of Andreas' pregnancy Harry had effectively shut down any thought of returning to the wizarding world. His entire focus was on Evelyn and creating a life for the two of them. He had wanted her to grow up in a stable and safe environment and that had consumed him.
"Ok, I get that, but what about when it was time for her to go to Hogwarts. You knew she had already displayed magic very early. I may have not been planning on going back then but I would have had to eventually, for her."
"True, but I had already thought of that."
"What do you mean?"
Andromeda stood up and walked over to a nearby desk and opened the drawer, pulling out a stack of brochures and magazines. Harry watched her as she sat back down and handed them to him. He took them curiously, brows rising at reading the top one. It was a brochure of Beauxbatons Academy of Magic.
"What is this?" He asked, unsure.
"I had been collecting information on other magical educational institutions."
"To send Evelyn away to another country for school?"
"Not just Evelyn. I had been thinking about it for Teddy, with his parentage of a werewolf father and his metamorphmagus abilities. I was concerned that he would face hardships and was looking to other schools in more progressive counties."
"I see." Harry replied, starting to feel overwhelmed. "I'm not sure I could send Evelyn to another country."
"Just for the record Harry, Hogwarts is in Scotland which is still technically another country."
Harry stared at her for a moment with wide eyes before a snort escaped him. Another followed another until he was full on laughing, giggling at her own stupidity. The sounds of Andromeda joining in only caused it to get worse until he was gasping for breath as tears fell down his cheeks. He didn't know how long they sat there, laughing, but as it died down, he couldn't help but feel better. Honestly laughter truly was the best medicine sometimes.
As he caught his breath, he grabbed his cup and took a long dreg of his now cold tea, coughing as it went down. He watched the woman sitting across from him, smiling back. He was glad to have her in his life. She had been a great confidant to him all these years, supporting him, helping him, and most importantly, keeping his secrets.
Harry looked down at the brochures again, admiring how many schools there actually were. If he were honest, he'd admit that he hadn't ever really thought of it. Outside the triwizard tournament he had other things to occupy his thoughts. He never gave any to other schools. His role in the war that came during his school years kept him from thinking of anything other than wizarding England. He can't even remember the last time or if he ever put any real thought into the wizarding world as a whole. But looking at the brochures in his lap, he marveled for a moment at how large their world really was.
"Thank you, Andromeda. For looking out for us, for me. I don't believe I'll ever be able to put into words how much I appreciate everything you've done."
"It was nothing, Harry. You needed help and it was within my powers to give. You're a good person, Harry. You've given so much to so many only to have everything taken away from many times over."
"Yeah, that's come to a stop." He chuckled. "I'm no longer able nor inclined to do that again. Everything I have now goes to Evelyn."
"As it should Mr. Potter." She replied primly, causing him to chuckle again.
"I do promise one thing to you, Andromeda. If I ever do run, if the urge to hide ever becomes too hard for me to fight any longer, I promise it will not be from you or Teddy. You will always know where we are." He told her.
"And as hard as it would be, I will keep you secret again. But I do hope it does not come to that."
Harry hoped so too.