*Sorry for the little hiatus! Here's Chapter 19, hope you enjoy!*

"Mist Shadow, will she survive?"

"I don't know. We have to wait until she wakes up." Unfamiliar cats, their voices tilted with strange accents. "River of Starlight said he'd seen something like this before. A fever so bad the cat started raving."

"What happened?" The first cat's voice was low and tremulous.

"The cat went mad," said the second voice--Mist Shadow, that's a strange name--simply. "Never recovered. Spoke nonsense for the rest of their life."

"Then wake her up." I know that name… Mapledawn struggled to place it. Named after a plant… a tree…

"Yew!" Mapledawn blinked open her eyes to find them crusty and foul from sleep. Her voice croaked in an unfamiliar rasp.

Three cats leaned over her. Yew's eyes were as wide as pools. The second cat, Mist Shadow, was a pale gray she-cat with long, feathery fur and dark amber eyes. The third cat, who hadn't spoken yet, was a sturdy, dark brown tabby with blue eyes. His tall, angular ears bore pale tufts at the edges. He was massive and well-muscled; his frame and even the forest scents clinging to his fur reminded Mapledawn of home.

"I'm okay," she rasped as Yew started nosing her flank. "I think I'm okay." She glanced at the big tabby. He was staring impassively down at her, but he still hadn't said a word.

"She's talking," grunted Mist Shadow. "That's a good sign. Can you tell us your name?"

"Mapledawn."

"Maple Dawn?"

"One word."

"Pleasure to meet you properly. I'm Mist Shadow. You've already met Yew. This is Waiting Falcon."

"Strange names," mused Mapledawn, half to herself.

Mist Shadow shrugged. "No stranger than yours."

"Point taken." She perched upright in her nest; it was made of cleaned prey pelts--rabbit, vole, and rat--and down feathers. Why didn't we think of that? FireClan used animal skins to hold water, but they rarely slept on them. They used moss instead. Mapledawn sunk her claws deep into the furry nest. This is much better.

She glanced around. They were in a shallow ravine surrounded by oak and maple trees. She spotted a few more nests in the ravine, but they didn't look well-used.

"Where are we?"

"This is the Lesser Oak Crash. Over past those trees is the Rat Grounds, good hunting. The Clearpool is that way." Mist Shadow pointed with her tail. "That's the herb garden. Yew will show you around when you're a bit better."

Mapledawn craned her neck, trying to see the landmarks the pale gray queen pointed out. It's almost like a Clan, she realized. Who are these rogues?

"How many cats live here?"

Mist Shadow shrugged again. "A dozen or so right now, but only three of us live here permanently. Me, Lark's Call, and Waiting Falcon. The others, like Yew here, come and go as they please." She cleaned her foreclaws nonchalantly as they spoke. "It's a good spot to raise kits. Sometimes the queens stay, or one of their young. My mother whelped me here before moving on."

"I'll fetch you some prey," said Waiting Falcon. Mapledawn started at his voice; it was deep and low, almost intimidating.

She dipped her head awkwardly. "Thank you." His icy blue eyes regarded her for a moment longer, saying nothing; then he turned and left.

"My brother's the strong, silent type," said Mist Shadow with a chuckle.

"Brother?" They looked nothing alike. Mist Shadow was pale and soft, with a lean frame. Waiting Falcon, heavily-muscled with bold black stripes and deep brown fur, dwarfed her.

"Half-brother. My mother had another litter here a few seasons after me. Like I said, good spot for queens."

So you keep saying. Mist Shadow gave her an inscrutable look after the word 'queen.' What, does she think that's why I'm out here all alone? That my mate abandoned me? She stifled a scoff. Wrencatcher and I never used that word. And we're both young… Barely warriors. She tried not to think about queenhood at all. About kits. That's one thing I can't forget about my past life. One thing that always yowled its way to the surface.

She'd had kits, three perfect kits, and she'd lost them.

And a part of it had been her own fault.

"Mapledawn?" Yew was staring at her expectantly.

"Sorry, what?"

"I was asking if you wanted to take a tour of the area tomorrow."

"Already?" Hadn't she just gotten over an insane fever? She didn't even remember it. It was all a haze. There'd been walking. Weird visions. Weird sounds. And a badger, for some reason. And then a long darkness, a blanketing darkness.

"You've been here for four days, Mapledawn. Don't you remember?"

She shook her head blearily. "I remember… I remember meeting you. I remember you treating my wound. I remember it getting infected. And I remember leaving."

"Nothing else? What about… All those things you said?"

"Don't push her," Mist Shadow chided gently. "She's been sick a long time. Might be best to forget what happened. You're here now, and we'll take care of you. That's what matters."

Things I said? She wracked her brain, but she couldn't remember anything. Did I tell him about my past life or something? It didn't matter, she decided. Whatever secrets she'd revealed would have sounded like absolute nonsense.

Waiting Falcon came later and silently dropped a thrush at Mapledawn's paws. Feeling even more awkward now that he was back to saying nothing at all, she gestured with her tail for him to share. Nodding slightly, he sat and ate with slow, careful bites. She tried not to stare at the big tabby with the pretty eyes and the mysterious air.

"So," she said as she finished her last mouthful, "how long have you lived around here?"

"My whole life. Mostly."

"Mostly?"

The tom nodded, and for a while it seemed that was all he was willing to divulge. The he began again:

"I spent some time in the mountains." He took the birds' remains, dug a scoop in the ground a tail length away, and buried them neatly. "Interesting folk up there. Skinny. Don't know how they handle the cold with such little fur."

Mapledawn's ears perked. She knew there were cats living in the far mountains, but no one ever talked about them in FireClan.

"What were they like?" She'd always pictured massive cats with lean muscles and thick manes of fur living up in the cold peaks.

"Quiet. Prickly, sort of. Didn't seem to like strangers. Called themselves the Tribe. Never left the mountains. Strange way to live." He shrugged. "Different prey for different cats, I suppose."

"Is this place like a tribe?" She tilted her head. Tribes, Clans, rouges living in the same spot and taking care of one another. It all seemed like different versions of the same thing. She cast a furtive glance around: could the Ageless Ones touch her here? Can they hear my blasphemy? But for once, the shadows stayed mundane and no voices rose to whisper in her ears.

"Not really. Not many rules here. But cats have always lived in this spot, I think. If you go down to the rocks by the Clearpool, you can see old paw prints worn into the stone. I think even if all the little groups around here disbanded forever, new cats would take their place. Eventually, a housecat somewhere would get bored sleeping at a human's feet, and come looking for wild lands."

Mapledawn tipped her head. Maybe we are so simple. All repeating the same lives over and over again, and trying not to make the same mistakes.

Waiting Falcon's blue eyes bore into her. "Share what you're thinking."

Mapledawn shrank back. "It's nothing spectacular." Nothing as deep and interesting as what you're saying.

The tom rumbled a pur and put his fluffy tabby tail on her shoulder. "Let me be the judge of that."

His fur felt warm on hers. "I was just thinking…" She cleared her throat. "How similar we are all. Cats from all types of lives. Always repeating the past, trying to make up for the same old, buried mistakes… I don't know what I'm saying."

"Sure you do." Waiting Falcon purred again. "You have an interesting insight, Mapledawn." His eyes fixed steadily on hers. She found she couldn't look away; she was lost in their icy blue. "Not many cats think so deeply about things."

"You do."

"And you." He drew a paw across his face, licked it, and cleaned his ears carefully. "That's a rare trait. Be proud of it." He gave her a nod, stretched, and fixed his gaze on the horizon. "I'll be back tomorrow to give you a tour of this little spot. Rest well. River of Starlight and Mist Shadow will be back later to give you herbs."

"Thanks for the thrush," Mapledawn called after him. Waiting Falcon flicked his tail to show he'd heard as he padded away.

Mapledawn pressed deeper into her nest. This place… These cats… Waiting Falcon certainly was strange, but interesting. More interesting than most of the cats back home. What did Frecklewish tell the Clan about me? That she'd been colluding with Scratchface, plotting FireClan's downfall? That she'd betrayed them--just like she did in her past life? That she was as evil and sinister and foxhearted as the whispering shadows insisted she was?

Mapledawn curled her claws into the vole fur beneath her. All I've done for them, she thought bitterly, and I'm to be judged for a past life. Not for who I am now. Not for who I've been in this life. If only StarClan would come to her now with their accusing eyes and snarling lips. She knew exactly what she'd say to them. She glared at the sky peeking through the trees. Well?

As dusk set in, she waited, stared. No answer from the stars. I'm out of their reach. Mapledawn's paws tingled. They couldn't follow me here.

Yew and Mist Shadow, plus a black-and-white tom named River of Starlight, gave her herbs to keep the fever from coming back and keep her strength up as the sun began to set.

Mist Shadow pointed to each one and named them: "Chamomile, to soothe anxiety and provide strength. Tansy for fever. Burnet and sorrel for strength. Feverfew for chills. And just one poppy seed to help you sleep."

"I'm not a medicine cat," Mapledawn protested.

"Every cat should know the basics. What if no one had come to help you when you had your fever? What if you woke up ill in the middle of the forest with no one to help you? What if you came across a sick kit and there wasn't time to find help? It does no one harm to learn, Mapledawn." Mist Shadow shrugged. "Of course, not every cat has the memory for herbs. Waiting Falcon always mixes up thyme and watermint."

"Thanks, I guess." Mapledawn bent her head to lap up the herbs, but River of Starlight's shocked look stopped her. "What?"

"You were going to eat them straight?"

"Well… Yeah?"

"Clan cats are cruel, aren't they?" River of Starlight shook his head. "Here." He unwrapped a mouse from the leaf wrap holding the herbs, tore off a few strips of flesh, and tucked the herbs inside. "Try it this way."

Mapledawn blinked in surprise as she gulped down the prey. The meat and blood from the mouse mingled with the herb taste; the savory prey cut off the herbs' bitter edge while the herbs enriched the nuance of the prey's flavor.

"Smart," she said, licking her lips. "I'll have to share that with Cloudstep if I--"

No, no! What am I thinking? I can never go back! They all think I'm a traitor. Wrencatcher hates me… She couldn't help but picture his fur almost gold in the dappled sun of Thunder forest, his steady, thoughtful eyes.

"Mapledawn?" Yew's big ears were cocked in concern.

"I'm fine." She climbed deeper into her nest and tucked her nose under her tail. "Goodnight." This is my home now. She felt Yew circling down next to her and couldn't help but purr. I have friends here. A new way of life… Maybe I'll move on one day, like Mist Shadow says most cats do. Maybe I'll see the mountains. But I can never go back to the Clans. I can never go back to the cruel, whispering shadows haunting every pawstep. Redpoppy will be okay without me. Wrencatcher will find a new mate. And Weaselclaw will take care of Scratchface, I know she will. Mapledawn yawned widely; the herbs were taking effect. That was never my battle, anyway.