Shoto Todoroki had never had much.

You wouldn't expect that from the son of the number two hero, of course. Which was valid. The higher the hero's ranked the more money they had.

Physically, Shoto did have a lot. He'd always had plenty of toys, and food, and space. They could afford anything he asked for. And as long as his father was ok with it, he'd usually get it. His father didn't care about how much money was spent on his children.

But that wasn't what Shoto meant. That had never really been what he wanted. Not truly, anyways.

The thing is, he'd never had much of anything that really mattered.

He'd never had many people who cared about him. He had his family, but he rarely got much time to spend with them. He'd never felt safe in his own home. He'd never had his father's love. He'd never had a normal childhood.

He'd say he also never had friends, but that would be a lie. After all, at this point he practically had a second family.

There was Izuku, of course. Sweet, if chaotic, and caring Izuku. Probably Shoto's best friend. Then Hitoshi, Shoto's other best friend, who definitely needed more sleep, but was hilarious and snarky and, just fun.

Then there was Touya's best friend, Izuku's big brother Tenko. Sure he was more of Touya's friend than Shoto's, but he'd become like another big brother to him. Especially after the incident with his burn, when he and Hisashi came to see him.

Which brings him to the last two, Inko and Hisashi, Izuku and Tenko's parents. They were amazing, they were loving, they showed him what real parenting was like. Parenting that didn't involve fear and anger. Parenting that showed they really cared.

They were like Shoto's second family. His right family.

Not that he didn't love his own. The only one he disliked at all was his father.

His mom was his greatest source of comfort and stability for years, because she went through just as much if not more trial from his father than he did. And if she could handle it, so could he.

That was, until he realized she couldn't, of course.

He also had his three older siblings that, although he didn't get to spend much time with because of training, loved him, and he loved them. They always tried to make him feel better, and had really stepped up since mom left. Especially Fuyumi and Touya, being the oldest.

Fuyumi had basically taken up the mother hen role, she did all the work around the house now, cooked, cleaned, anything that needed done was already done on her watch. Including anything her siblings needed. She was always there to help. Even though he knew mom leaving hurt her.

Then there was Touya. Touya stepped up in a completely different way, but which was just as helpful. He stepped up as exactly what he was, and had always been. The big brother. He was the strong one, the brave one, the smart one. He was the one who tussled everyone's hair and teased and pushed them around, but he was also the one who gave the best advice and was willing to listen and comfort at any time of day or night. He was who would stay up with Shoto and help him with nightmares, or would protect him when his father was mad.

Earlier he mentioned that Izuku and Hitoshi were his best friends. That was true. But Touya had always been his best friend, in a completely different way.

In the best way. In the big brother way.

In the Touya way.

Shoto could still picture Touya grinning teasingly at him, feel his big hands ruffling Shoto's hair, hear the snarky remarks and the honest words and the playful laugh. Every where he looked, he expected to see him, still there, just like always.

But now, every time, he was disappointed.

He was disappointed over and over again, to hear nothing but empty promises, to see tear stained, broken smiles, to feel hands gripping his so tight they hurt. And all from the wrong people.

None from Touya.

He was disappointed, to see nothing left of what used to be, but a photograph. A photograph that he couldn't look away from.

In that photograph he could see the smile, in that photograph he could hear the laughs, he could feel the warm hugs. Everything outside of the picture felt empty. Reality felt empty.

That picture held Touya.

So why did it hurt so bad to look at?

Shoto didn't know how long he stared at that picture for once it was set up, surrounded by flowers and some smoking stick he couldn't remember the name of. Not that he cared.

If he could, he might've set the whole thing on fire.

Not the picture though. He would've hidden that, where no one but he knew where it was. Where he had it all to himself. In Touya's room, maybe.

Shoto's the only one who's been brave enough to open that door since the fire. And he's perfectly fine with keeping it that way.

He'd preserve that room, and everything in it, forever if he had to. If only to feel like Touya was still living there.

"Shoto."

Shoto could see Fuyumi out the corner of his eye. Her face was red, her eyes were wet, her hair was a tangled mess falling out of her ponytail. She didn't even have her glasses on. "You need to try and go to sleep. It's late."

The end of that sentence was left unsaid.

And dad might want you training more tomorrow.

Shoto still couldn't look away from the picture though.

"Shoto-"

"I'll go to bed when I'm tired."

Fuyumi's silence to that said enough. Shoto was tired. He was obviously so, being how little he'd slept the last few nights. His body was begging or him to sleep the world away and never get up again.

But his brain knew he would be no sleeping tonight anyway. He'd rather stay here. With Touya.

Finally Fuyumi stood back up from where she'd been crouched beside Shoto on the ground, with a heavy sigh. She started to walk away, but after a few steps, paused.

"He wouldn't have wanted this," she said quietly. "You, exhausting yourself."

Shoto spent a long moment in silence, partially hoping Fuyumi would just walk away, but she didn't. She stayed standing still, facing away from him.

"You're one to talk," he finally said, knowing his voice was void of emotion.

Fuyumi tensed. Ever since the fire, she'd done nothing but work. She'd done far more than she ever had after mom left. She was resorting to keeping herself busy as a distraction. Shoto had been able to hear her reorganizing her room, over and over again at night when she should've been asleep. Though to be fair, he should've been asleep to.

And no one would even bring up Natsuo's sudden interest in school. He'd resorted to staying away from home, from the family, as much as possible. He suddenly had plans with everyone in his class, he was leaving for school early in the mornings and coming home late. Fuyumi said she'd rarely saw him passing by in the halls at school anymore. He was engrossed in studies (so he claimed) and socializing, in having fun and drowning out his thoughts any way possible. Shoto was worried what that meant. And he'd developed such a pure, unhindered, but silent hatred of their father that Shoto was worried he'd explode.

But the worst part, maybe, might've been the fact that he hadn't heard a word the Midoriya's. Or Hitoshi. Or Keigo and Rumi. He'd heard nothing from the outside world except through the news, which he'd avoided with how much it centered around Touya's death lately.

It scared him to wonder how they're all handling it, and why none of them were even calling.

Though it was entirely possible his father was holding back any calls, and had made Fuyumi and Natsuo do the same. That sounded like something the hero Endeavor, or the Endeavor he knew, would do. Especially being that his recent emotional state was… confusing, to say the least.

Shoto wasn't sure when Fuyumi walked away, or when Natsuo came home for the first time that day and completely sped past him and the shrine, or when all the lights in the house were turned off except for the one overhead of him. He might've tensed a bit when he heard his father's footsteps, but he barely noticed.

He especially couldn't have told you when he fell asleep on the ground by the shrine, but he had to say, it was probably the best sleep he'd gotten since the fire.

Because Touya was right there next to him, just like he always was when Shoto couldn't sleep. At least, that's what he fell asleep believing.

And that night, he dreamt about bright, blue fire.