Author's Note: Thank you to Vorcha Girl, Dark Phoenix Rising, Jules Hawk, and spacecats for your comments on the last chapter. As requested, here's some more. We're getting to my favorite scenes, and I'm anxious for you to read them. For now, here's the end of ME1 ... Enjoy. - TLC
Chapter Thirty-Two
Kaidan woke hours later, lying on his cot in the makeshift hospital they had set up near the Tower, where damage was heaviest. It wasn't really a hospital, just a large area with cots for the injured civilians and lower ranking soldiers. Officers were lucky, they had deep green, rough, woolen curtains for privacy.
He still wasn't sure how long he and Garrus had waited for the rescue team. While waiting, Kaidan would randomly check for Shepard's suit monitor, hoping for different results that never came. The migraine had come on suddenly as they waited. The pain that had shot through his head was the most intense pain he had felt since Noveria. It was C-Sec who found them. Anderson followed asking about Shepard immediately. Kaidan avoided looking at the Captain, which was easy to do since he could barely stand, let alone open his eyes. He heard Garrus tell him they had been separated from her and had not been able to locate her. Anderson extended the search radius, and C-Sec escorted Kaidan and Garrus to the medics. Kaidan had a few fractured ribs and a mild concussion, which had triggered the migraine.
Chakwas had come in to check on him. She'd given him the same drug cocktail she had used on the Normandy and he had slept for a long time. Thankfully, when he woke the headache was manageable again, though the emptiness in his core still burned. He sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed when the Alliance doctor came in and told him he would be released the next morning. The doctor gave him his instructions for his injuries and the folder with his orders. He was on leave until the end of the month, then he would have to report to Arcturus for his next assignment. He sighed and pulled on his boots. There was a bit of a commotion on the opposite side of his curtain and Garrus entered.
"They found her," Garrus announced, and Kaidan looked up at the Turian, afraid to hope. "She's alive, but she's injured," He said and Kaidan stood to push passed him but Garrus held his arms securely. "Anderson's with her now. She's not even conscious."
"But she's alive?" Kaidan asked, his eyes searching Garrus's for the answer. Garrus's mandibles twitched and he nodded. Kaidan let out a strangled breath and let himself lean back on the cot behind him. He dropped his head as the emotion filled him, his head swam with it. It was too much, and he could feel the tension start to pulse at the back of his head.
"Alenko, you okay?" Garrus asked, concern in his voice as he reached out and placed his hand on his arm. Kaidan tried to nod, but just laid back on the cot and closed his eyes tight against the light. "Your head?" He asked and Kaidan nodded again. Garrus left to get the Doctor. Chakwas would be with Shepard, so the Alliance doctor who had just given him his papers came back in with the syringe filled with her concoction. Thankfully, he was asleep within moments. It was a deep, dreamless, drug-induced sleep.
Kaidan woke the next morning when an Asari nurse had come in to check his vitals. She smiled sweetly at him, and told him he could go as soon as he ate breakfast. He asked for it to be brought as soon as possible. She nodded and left the area. He scrubbed his hands over his face as he pulled on his boots. He may have slept but he still felt thoroughly exhausted. He needed a shave, and a shower. He ran his hands through his hair as the Asari returned with his tray of food. He was scheduled to leave the station that afternoon to head to Vancouver.
He really wanted to see Shepard before he left. He cleared his tray, and when the nurse returned he thanked her and she held the curtain open for him so he could go. He wandered around the hospital area, hoping to catch a glimpse of her. He was surprised by the number of patients he passed, not all lucky enough for the privacy of the curtains. There had been more damage than he had realized.
He rounded a corner and saw her. Her curtain was open just enough for him to see her lying with her back to him, her body curled around her pillow. He felt the smile pull at his lips as he moved closer to her. "Excuse me, Sir?" A soft voice spoke up next to him. He turned, startled, and looked down into the bright green eyes of a petite, friendly looking, blonde nurse.
"Ma'am?" He asked, and noticed her blush.
"This area is for Officers and visitation is restricted to Commanding Officers and family," She informed him, and Kaidan felt like the rug had been pulled out from beneath his feet. He nodded, and looked back to Shepard.
"She has no family," He muttered and she asked him to repeat himself and he shook his head, "Nothing. She's my … CO and I just wanted to make sure she was going to be okay before I left the station." It was another one of those moments where the contrast in their situations was so blunt. If their roles had been reversed, his parents would have been on their way here already. There was no one to call for Shepard.
"You served together?" She asked, and Kaidan looked down to her before nodding. "Well, if you ask me that makes you family." He thought maybe he saw a flash of understanding in her eyes. She placed her hand gently on his back and ushered him closer to her cot. "I'll be just over there, if either of you need anything," She promised gesturing with her thumb over her shoulder. He smiled and thanked her before stepping into Shepard's room. He turned and watched as she closed the curtain behind him.
He moved around the cot so he could see her face. She was sleeping, her eyes closed, mouth slightly open. His eyes moved over her. She had a deep purple bruise extending down the side of her face from her temple to her jaw. Parts of the bruised skin had been torn, and her skin glistened with the medi-gel. Her arm was in a sling and secured to her torso to stop it from moving and her knee was enclosed in a brace. He looked at the monitors next to her bed. Her heart beat was normal and strong, pounding out his favorite song.
He felt the relief wash over him like a tidal wave, he scrubbed his hands over his face again and pulled a chair up to the cot. He sat kicking his feet out in front of him and crossing them at the ankle. He folded his hands on his stomach and laid his head back telling himself he was just resting his eyes.
When he opened them, it was much later. Shepard hadn't moved, but her eyes were open and she smiled at him. When he noticed the glassiness of her gaze and they way her eyes were drooping, he realized she must be on some serious painkillers. "You do snore," She teased and he laughed softly shaking his head and stretching as he sat up. "Are you okay?" She asked him, and he was touched by the honest concern in her tone. Even as she lay there in bandages, and hooked up to machines, she worried.
"I'm fine. Garrus, too. Minor scrapes," He answered, and gestured to her bandages in question. She started to roll to her back to sit up, and hissed a curse at the pain. Kaidan was on his feet instantly, his hands around her ribs supporting her weight. Her uninjured hand was on his bicep as he lifted her so she could sit up. They were close and when her breath brushed across his neck, he felt the gooseflesh rise in its wake. Once she was sitting, he adjusted the cot so she could sit with the support of the mattress at her back.
She shifted for a moment, getting comfortable, before she thanked him. He nodded, and sat in the chair again. Leaning forward, he rested his arms on her cot with her. "Dislocated shoulder, lots of bruises, and I reinjured my ACL," She answered his question and he nodded. "Doc says I can leave the sling here when I go, but I'll have to keep the knee brace for awhile," She must have seen the concern he felt. "I'll be alright," She promised and, when their eyes met, the space between them was filled with the things that hadn't been said. It was thick on the air and Kaidan swallowed.
"We thought… After the crash, I checked for you but your suit didn't respond," He was whispering, speaking around the knot in his throat as he thought about the hours that had passed when he had been sure she'd been killed. "We thought … the worst."
She reached out and placed her hand on his forearm. He covered her hand with his, "My suit was damaged when I fell," He asked then what had happened and she explained that the piece of Sovereign that had crashed through the window had taken out the section of floor she had been standing on and she went down, hard. She had been knocked unconscious, and when she woke she was in the hospital.
"I'm sorry," He whispered and she raised an eyebrow at him. "I should have made sure you were okay, or Pulled you away from the window…" He'd had the time to think about how he could have saved her while they waited to be found.
She flexed the fingers beneath his hand and threaded them through his, "Bullshit, I gave you an order," She reminded him, "You did the right thing."
"Yeah, alright," He accepted her words. She had absolved him, but he still felt guilty. He looked to their hands, and could feel her biotics humming beneath her skin. It thrilled him in a way that was not appropriate at the moment. He cleared his throat. "We have to stop meeting like this," He said it in a teasing manner but her eyes narrowed at him.
"You're right. It would be much nicer to wake up with you someplace that's not a hospital," She replied quietly, and he felt his cheeks flush.
"I, Shepard," He had started to explain why he'd left her bed before she'd woken, but she snorted, rolling her eyes and squeezing his hand.
"I know, Kaidan," She said, and he felt himself relax. "I just like making you blush." He laughed softly, as he watched her eyes. There was a brightness in them he had never seen before. It made his heart thump against his ribs. They sat in a comfortable silence for a while. "So, you're going to Vancouver for leave?" She asked him quietly.
"Uh, yeah," He answered, looking to her eyes again, "After Virmire, I had gotten another message from Mom asking for a visit. I promised her I would."
"That will be nice," She commented, and failed to hide the disappointment from him. She sighed, "It looks like my leave is going to be full of bullshit meetings, anyway."
"What do they have you doing?" He had held on to hope that they'd still be able to work out a way to spend some time together.
"I'm going off station later today, probably to Arcturus. My time is booked solid all week. Between Alliance Brass, the Council, the press… if I had known saving the galaxy would force me into my own personal hell, I might have let the Reapers come," She explained and he truly felt sympathetic for her. His thumb slowly stroked her fingers, and she started to ramble, "You just make sure you take care of yourself when you go home. Spend time with your family, eat well, exercise, rest…" He pulled his hand from hers and her eyes followed him as he stood, bracing himself on the edge of the far side of the cot as he leaned over and kissed her. Her words died in the gasp at the back of her throat. She lifted her hand and cupped his face as their lips danced. Her mouth opened for him instantly, and he let himself deepen the kiss, his hand tangling in her hair.
He ended the kiss reluctantly, pressing his forehead to hers for a silent moment before releasing her and abandoning his chair to sit next to her. His hand still on the far side of the cot and he leaned over her, supporting himself with his hand on the cot and just barely pressing against her hip. Her hand went to her lips, like she was trying to hold on to the feel of his against hers as a smile pulled at them. "I told Mom I'd come to Vancouver for a week. My second week, I'll be on Arcturus, with you."
He adored the blush on her cheeks when she spoke, "Good thing I have accommodations off base."
He grinned and leaned closer to her, his lips brushed against hers as he spoke, "A very good thing," He kissed her again, her uninjured arm wound itself around his neck, holding him close until she was ready to release him. It was a longer kiss this time and Kaidan had to resist the urge to lie on the cot and pull her close. Especially when her fingers teased the skin beneath his implant. He shivered and pulled away from her, but only slightly. "I should go," He whispered against her lips and he could feel her grinning when he kissed her again. After a moment, he pulled away and she let him stand. "We'll talk soon, okay?"
She nodded and yawned, her eyes drooping. He leaned down and kissed her forehead before turning to leave. She rested her head back against the pillow and watched him leave with a sleepy smile on her lips. Kaidan felt himself grinning as he left the area. The nurse who had helped him earlier spotted him leaving and winked at him. He chuckled, feeling lighter than he had in months.
They'd defeated Saren, Sovereign, their geth, and stopped the Reaper invasion. They had survived, a little worse for the wear, but alive nonetheless. He was actually looking forward to seeing his parents. It had been too long since his last trip home. As his mind drifted to the second week of leave, he looked up just in time to spot Anderson heading his way. He moved to the side to allow him to pass, and saluted. Anderson looked at him, brow creased as he passed and went to Shepard's area. It was a good thing he had left when he did. He wondered momentarily if Shepard would tell David about them. He didn't think she would, but the specifics of her relationship with Anderson were something Kaidan hadn't been able to decipher just yet. When he considered their drinks at Flux, and the way the Captain had looked at him, he wondered if maybe she already had. With that thought festering, he went down to the docks to get his items from the Normandy and catch his shuttle to Earth.
It had been creepy to be on the Normandy without the crew, just Alliance techs and engineers running their checks. He emptied his locker and by the time he got to the dock for his shuttle, he'd only had to wait about half an hour. He'd had just enough time to send off a few messages. One to Joker, letting him know he hoped to see him back on the Normandy after leave. He sent a message to Garrus thanking him for everything the Turian had done for him over the course of the mission, and not just professionally. He felt sincerely disappointed to learn that Liara, Tali, and Wrex were already off station. He'd hoped to say goodbye, instead, he sent them a message, again, thanking them for all their help.
He'd received a response from Tali almost immediately, and had to laugh when she threw in a dig about his choice omni-tool before signing the message. His last message was sent just as his shuttle arrived for his flight to Earth. He let his Mom know he was on his way, and gave her his arrival time: 10:00am Pacific Time. He knew it would take her too long to calculate Galactic Time and figure it out. He considered picking up one of the clocks he'd seen, that had both times displayed, for her. It might help stop the midnight vid calls he so frequently ignored.
He smiled as he stood to head onto the shuttle. He had the tendency to avoid trips home because his Mom, God bless her, insisted on parading him around town and dropping hints to anyone – waitresses, store clerks, and the like – that he was unmarried; like he was a prize stallion in the market for a mare. It was embarrassing. Especially embarrassing after a few glasses of wine. That's when she would start talking about her desire for grandchildren and how she wasn't getting any younger.
Truth was, his parents are on the older side. Kaidan had been born to his parents later in their lives. His father retired from the Alliance at fifty-five, when Kaidan was just five years old. He appreciated that his Mom never called him a mistake. She called him a surprise. She said mistakes were things you regretted and surprises were things you didn't know you wanted until you had them. Kaidan found when he was older that they had tried for many years, but had never been able to get pregnant. It was hard on their relationship. The stress of failure on top of his father's absence when he was on assignment. Eventually, they gave up and accepted the fact that they weren't meant to be parents.
So, it had been quite the shock to his father when his forty-two year old wife called him and informed him that she was pregnant. Kaidan remembered a bit from those early years. They moved around a lot and it was tough on his Mom, raising Kaidan virtually alone. His father saw this, and retired once he reached the appropriate age. It had been the three of them since then. He was grateful for his parents, and the support they had given him all his life; especially with the biotics. Though, admittedly, they didn't know the whole story behind BAaT.
He sighed, leaning back in his seat and settling in for the long flight. He had to admit, he was excited to see them. He just hoped his Mom would honor the request in his message and allow this to be just the three of them. No surprise guests, no trips around town, and no set-ups. He didn't need to be set-up; not anymore. He knew, however, that his Mom would not believe him; not unless she met her, and Kaidan didn't see that happening in the near future. He felt gravity shift and that familiar rush of vertigo as they pulled away from the station. He opened his 'tool and started working on an algorithm that he hoped to apply to the code from Vigil, to try to decipher some of the information he had managed to copy with the security codes. It would take… there was really no way to know how long it would take, which made it the perfect way to pass the time on the flight.