a/n: For Jami and Eileen, and all of their patience for dealing with me. this chapter is the first of four that are centered on Michael... So buckle up. We are just getting started.
'And he's long gone when he's next to me
And I realize the blame is on me
'Cause I knew you were trouble when you walked in
So shame on me now
- I Knew You Were Trouble / Red Era
All I knew this morning when I woke
Is I know something now
Know something now I didn't before
- Everything Has Changed / Red Era
It was the last thing he'd ever expected.
When he'd opened the door and found a man with a snake around his neck, he'd never imagined that it would Michael Bower. In all their conversations, Angela had never really given him more than vague acknowledgements of the end of the marriage. Looking at him, Tony had to admit that he could see where the two of them would've made sense together. They matched liked a upscale Barbie and Ken, the way that he and Marie had been the Brooklyn equivalent. A perfect match. He had to admit, he'd never seen Angela as mad as she was the moment she'd realized Michael was there. Through all his mess ups he'd ways been the voice of reason and had somehow found a way to calm down and assess the situation from a place of maturity. Slamming the door in Michael's face had been surprisingly out of the norm for her. But that had been nothing on the revelation that she was still married to the man.
He'd spent months building a relationship with her. It didn't matter that they were strictly platonic in a boss and employee way that was starting to rapidly blur into a deep friendship. It felt like a bucket of ice water being dumped on him when she had averted her eyes from him to stare daggers at Michael while uttering, "This clown is my husband." The sentence was almost on a loop in the back of his mind. He had to admit part of him had been flattered that Michael had assumed he was the new guy, even mores when Angela had teased that they could've done things if they had wanted to. It occurred to Tony then, that Angela had been seeing other men throughout the last several months. He'd never been separated and the semantics of it would've made sense if someone explained, but in his mind, all he could do was wonder how it didn't amount to infidelity.
They sure fought like a married couple. He wished he'd been more prepared for tonight's tension in suburbia, instead he was just standing in front of the sofa speechless and learning more information about their lack of a marriage and their plethora of issues. He couldn't blame either one of them. He'd certainly had his share of time being away from home when he'd played for the Cards. Nothing like 9 months without communication, but 2 months of not being together as a couple had been a regular occurrence. Marie had been willing to stay at home, raise Samantha, let him live his dream. She hadn't had the streak of tenacity and ambition that Angela had. It didn't take much to imagine that he could be in a very similar situation to Michael if he'd married someone like Angela.
He couldn't imagine the impossibility of making a decision like that. It seemed like it would be one of the hardest decisions to make. How could someone choose between a career they loved and the family they'd always dreamt of?
You had me several years ago when I was still quite naive
Well you said that we made such a pretty pair and that you would never leave
But you gave away the things you loved
And one of them was me
- You're So Vain / Cover
And now you ask about you and I
There's no you and I
Remember what you put me through
- I Heart ? / Debut Era
She didn't know why she was so surprised he'd shown up out of the blue like this.
No one knew how to make an unwanted entrance quite like Michael. A long time ago, she'd found it endearing and sort of sexy that he could always surprise her with an unplanned visit. After 9 months of radio silence, missing their son's birthday, and apparently jumping continents chasing the next big story, he'd somehow thought that he would be able to show up and be forgiven and that all would go back to normal. Before he'd left for Kenya, when they had formally filed the court documents for their legal separation, she hadn't been sure what the future of their marriage was. It had taken months of reading and researching terms and ideas associated with the process.
One description had called it the best of all worlds. She could have her husband and all the benefits that came with that while still having a boyfriend or two or three on the side without it being viewed as an affair. The reality was that she'd never wanted a marriage like that. An 'open marriage' felt like it defeated the purpose of even getting married. She'd agreed to it for Jonathan's sake and she had to admit that the longer Michael was gone, the easier it had been to allow herself to take liberties outside of the marriage.
She'd gotten the locks changed on the doors not long before Tony had arrived and once he was there, she'd decided that it was time to end things for good. She'd filed for divorce from Michael within a month of Tony's arrival, and had never looked back. She'd expected that eventually she'd get the notification from her attorney that the marriage had ended and that she was able to go on with her life in the exact same way she had been. She hadn't planned on Michael returning to the house expecting that she'd bewailing for him like a doting little woman.
Sam's return home had been a challenge that had only amplified the stress she was filling. Explaining over and over again that she was still married to the jackass in the safari get-up was getting old, but that had been a pleasure compared to the arrival of her mother. Mona had liked Michael well enough initially. He was well-bred and worldly. He knew all the right things to say and certainly looked the part of what any mother would want for their daughter. He'd been perfect, until he'd come home with lipstick on his collar just after Jonthan's first birthday.
Angela had never asked how many other women there had been. She didn't really want to know. But the knowledge that it had happened had felt like someone had ripped her heart out. She and her son weren't enough to make him want to be faithful. He'd apologized. He'd come up with some lame excuse about her being gone at the office so much and him just having urges that needed to be met. After she'd told Mona, that was when everything took a turn. Mona had wanted her to end things right then and there, but Angela had insisted that she was going to change.
5 years later, after denying and denying it, she had been forced to admit that it was beyond repair. Almost a year after that and, in typical Michael Bower fashion, he was turning it all around on her. Laying the blame for not speaking to him about the divorce at her feet, instead of recognizing that he'd been impossible to get ahold of. He lived his life as a fucking nomad of existence with no thought for the people he left behind.
And yet, as upset as she was and as hurt as she was, the minute Jonathan had called out to him and came racing down the stairs, she'd felt a tsunami of guilt wash over her. It was so clear that her little boy adored his father. The way Jonathan clung to Michael, and the way that Michael returned the embrace had Angela questioning everything. Despite her own feelings about Michael and his decisions in life, Jonathan was her world. She had to admit that missed birthdays aside, Michael had always been a decent father Jonathan.
Tony's voice broke through the room as he cleared his throat and nodded toward the kitchen. "I'm just gonna…" Angela nodded. The fact that a man she'd known for less than six months could carry on a wordless conversation with her while her husband of 13 years seemed completely foreign to her did not go unnoticed by her. Her brown eyes watched as he encouraged Sam to go upstairs and wash up, then met his dark ones as he started to pass her. Her eyes dropped to the floor as Mona began to follow Samantha upstairs. "Hey, Angela?" Her head whipped up as she turned toward the kitchen, her lower lip curled into her mouth, caught between her teeth as she lifted her eyebrows at him. "I just want to make sure that we're still on the same page with dinner tonight. Can I borrow you for a sec?"
She glanced back at Michael and Jonathan as they fawned over the snake that was now out of the bag and once again draped around Michael's neck. She snatched the divorce papers off the sofa and headed into the kitchen. She lowered herself into one of the wooden chairs at the table with a deep sigh and dropped her face into her hands. She refused to cry over him. She'd wasted too many tears on him already, and yet, she couldn't stop the familiar sting behind her eyes as they grew glassy. She lowered her hands and licked her lips before looking up at Tony, finding him standing by the stove with a plaintive look on his face. How the hell could she explain all this?
"Tony, don't… Don't look at me like that."
"Like what, Angela?" He crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned back against the sink with a dish towel thrown over his shoulder. "What? Like a woman who hasn't exactly lied but hasn't exactly been honest with me this whole time?" She shook her head as he spoke. She wanted to fight him but she couldn't. He wasn't wrong. He took a step toward the table, keeping one hand gripped on the sink to ground him as he ducked his head to meet her eyes. "Why didn't you tell me? I'm not thrilled about it but I ain't mad either. I just would've liked the heads up, ya know?"
She pushed out of the chair as she took a deep breath then opened her hands at her sides. "What was I going to say? I didn't expect this. I thought he'd sign the papers and that would be that. I didn't want him to show up. You don't know what it does to Jonathan every time he shows up for a few days and then is gone again. You don't know what it's like to have to mop up the tears because his absentee father decides that now is an appropriate time to return. And you know what gets me about this?" She folded her hands together in front of her face then shrugged. "I'm the bad guy. I'm the bad guy because I am taking away his father. He's not the bad guy. He's the hero because he shows up with a snake and fanfare. I'm here every day with him, Tony. Every day. And I'm still going to be the bad guy."
He watched as her shoulders heaved with a sob and crossed the room to her, pulling her into a tight hug as he rubbed her back. He couldn't help but find irony in the fact that just about a month ago she'd been the one helping him through something incredibly difficult and now, she was the fragile one. She took a step back from him, wiping at her eyes. "I'm sorry." She met his eyes with hers as a stray broke free from one eye. "I should've told you." She breathed a soft sigh of laughter as she rolled her eyes. "And for implying what I did with Michael earlier. I hope I didn't-"
"Oh no. No. You kidding?" He waved his hand as he headed to the fridge and began to pull ingredients out. "Aye, oh does he have any allergies or anything I should know about?" Angela's head tilted as she smirked and he pointed at her. "You knock that off. Go set the table in the dining room. I'll start making dinner."
Angela chuckled as she walked out of the kitchen. She couldn't imagine what she would've done without him. Anyone else and today could've been a disaster. Something about Tony Micelli made everything right in the world.
Right when I was just about to fall
I told myself, don't get attached
But in my mind, I play it back
- Come Back.. Be Here / Red Era
My head is saying, "Fool, forget him."
My heart is saying, "Don't let go.
Hold on 'til the end."
- Hopelessly Devoted To You / Cover
Dinner had been as uncomplicated as it could've been. Michael had spent the whole time regaling Jonathan with tales of his adventures like he was some off-brand knock off of Indiana Jones. If the looks her mother had been throwing her way were any indication, then they were unanimous that some of the exploits had been greatly exaggerated. They'd cleared the table as Michael took Jonathan out to the car to get the new cage for the snake then brought it into the living room. The last place that Angela wanted any reptilian beast. She watched from the her position leaning against the sofa table as her husband and son bonded over the snake. Missing Sam's soft proclamation of goodnight entirely.
The divorce papers were burning a metaphorical hole in Angela's pocket. All she wanted was to get them signed and get him the hell out of her house and life. But Michael seemed intent on pushing the envelope. Finally after sending Jonathan to bed, and allowing Michael to tuck him in, she made her way into the kitchen where she could release her frustration out at the two people who seemed to agree with her decision to end things.
She wasn't sure how it happened but in what felt like the blink of an eye, everyone was gone and it was just her and Michael again. "So signed any good divorce papers lately?" Things seemed to go downhill from there. One minute she was asking him to sign the papers and then they were right back to doing what they did best; arguing about their careers.
She'd always known that Michael resented her career choices. While she'd been working and hustling and struggling to make moves and grow in her role at Wallace and McQuade, he'd been expecting her to settle down, be pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen, and stay at home. Even the idea of it made her dizzy. She was not cut out for that life. Her dreams, her goals, required more.
"I didn't know you had it in you."
"That's because you never looked." She cursed herself for allowing her voice to break as she gripped her coffee mug so hard she was sure she'd snap the handle clean off of it.
"Well, I'm looking now. I'm impressed. I'm proud of you, Angela."
She felt her heart stop as she turned to look at him through glassy eyes that threatened to overflow with tears. 13 years of marriage, 2 years of dating before that and she could honestly say that this was the first time he'd said that to her. All the work, the late nights, the headaches, and miserable clients who made the days stretch on endlessly at times were all suddenly worth it. He was proud of her. "Thank you, Michael." Her voice was soft, timid as she acknowledged the moment. Then, just like that, the moment passed and they were back to talking about a divorce that Michael kept insisting he didn't want. She had to admit that it was nice having him around on the occasions he was home, and he made a valid point about not all of his assignments being so far away. That Texas trip had been memorable for so many reasons. Se had to admit that it wasn't all bad.
"Angela, I really do miss you."
He'd never looked at her like that before. Even in the early days of their marriage, he'd never looked at her like he was right now. She couldn't pinpoint what she was feeling in the moment. "MichaeI, you can't live like this, and I can't live like that."
"So it's over."
"Right." She closed her eyes as his fingers brushed along her cheek to cradle her face. All at one she was lightheaded and dizzy, but content and at peace. Kissing Michael was like putting on a comfortable cardigan. It was coming home. It was the easiest thing in the world to surrender to him and let herself fall headfirst into whatever he wanted.
And I'd be smart to walk away
But you're quicksand
This slope is treacherous
This path is reckless
- Treacherous / Red
And I fell from the pedestal
Right down the rabbit hole
Long story short, it was a bad time
Pushed from the precipice
Clung to the nearest lips
- Long Story Short / Evermore
And I don't know
Where I lost control
- Welcome Distraction / Unreleased
What the hell are we doing?
She glanced at the man next to her, sleeping peacefully with deep snores, and envied him. An hour ago, she'd been butchering a panettone in the kitchen out of anger. She'd been adamant about him signing the divorce papers. She'd been so sure that things were over and then… Then he'd floored her with his words, with a touch that she'd been missing, and her resolve had come crashing down like a house of cards. She'd made sure they'd finishing cleaning up the kitchen before she'd found herself confronting the unknown of next steps of what to do with Michael. Their kiss had made it clear that there was something still there. They'd left it undefined in the minutes after they'd hugged. Her mother's wail of her name had been indicative of her opinion of the tentative resolution that they'd seemingly come to, and still there were so many unanswered questions. She'd walked him to the door, her hands tucked into her pink vest pockets fingering the edges of the divorce papers. She'd been awkward as ever as she'd stood there with him, in many ways feeling like a teenager who was asking the boy she liked if he'd date her.
They'd made small talk about what hotel he was staying at, about what time Jonathan's school started, about what time he train left in the morning; anything but the pressing issue of what would happen next. She'd gotten her answer when he'd cupped her face and dipped his head to kiss along her jaw. She'd tried to resist. She'd given every reason she could think of: the kids being upstairs, Tony being upstairs, that it was late and she had an early morning; and by the time his mouth had sealed over hers again, the battle had been lost. She couldn't remember how they'd made their way up to the bedroom, but once the door had shut it had been like no time had passed. They'd fallen into the same patterns they'd always had in bed. Memories of what made each other sigh or moan had come back in vivid technicolor in their minds, and then it was over and he'd told her he loved her and had fallen asleep on his side, facing away from her.
And once again, Angela had to ask herself what the hell they were doing. She wasn't sure what this meant. Was this a second chance for them? Was this a final night of making love before he signed the papers and was gone forever? Were they going to consider this as dating? Somehow the number of questions she'd had standing by the front door with him had multiplied like rabbits. The one thing she could breath a deep sigh of relief about was the fact that her IUD would prevent any needless worrying about an unintentional pregnancy. That would've been the last thing she needed at a time like this anyway.
Her short nails picked at the edge of her sheets as she stared up at the ceiling through the pink open weave canopy. It was nice being intimate with Michael again, but she couldn't deny that something about it had felt rushed, forced in a way that she hadn't really wanted. Michael had always had the ability to do that to her. With a well placed caress or kiss, the man could rob her of all rational thought and leave her mind fogged. It was like being drunk or being underwater. Sounds, thoughts, light, everything seemed to be muted and and like it was in slow motion; everything, except for him.
She hadn't planned on falling into bed with him.
There was list of men that would've preceded him if she had been cognizant of what she was doing. She jolted slightly as he turned and draped his arm over her, nuzzling into her neck and pressing kisses along her jugular. She hummed softly, tilting her head to give him better access as he bit her lip. There it was again. That slow creeping haze into her mind. Just as he was rising up to crawl back over her, she found the last thread of consciousness and fought against the fog in her mind long enough to push him back. "Michael." He pushed against her hand hard enough to make her add a second hand and to pull her body away from his as much as she could. "Michael, stop."
He sighed as he hovered over her then rolled back to his side, propping himself up on his elbow. "Okay. I'll stop. What's on your mind, Angela? Why are you still awake?"
She pushed her hand through her hair as she turned to face him, mirroring his position and shrugging. "Michael, we have to talk about this."
"No, Angela. We don't. This," his fingers traced along her sheet cover hip, dipping at her waist and up to cradle her covered breast as he murmured to her, "Is the one thing we don't need to talk about." Her wide, doe eyes stared up at him as he tugged the sheet down from her chest. "We're not doing anything wrong. We're still married, and I still love you. You still love me?" She hesitated for a brief moment, then nodded slowly. "Then that's all that matters right now." And just like that, she was swallowed up in the haze all over again leaving her reservations for the morning.
I feel the lavender haze creeping up on me
Surreal
I'm damned if I do give a damn what people say
- Lavender Haze / Midnights Era
It wasn't often that Tony Micelli found himself stunned into a speechless rage. It was, in fact, against his type to shut up and seethe. As an Italian, macho, street kid he'd learned that using his voice and bravado was better than shutting up and trying to process things around him. It was a trait that he'd passed onto his daughter. It was also an early sore spot in his relationship with Angela. The woman loathed fighting and yet, had proven adept at using her fists and claws when necessary in her fight with Theresa at Marty's Melody Room. It was because of that fight that he'd witnessed that what he'd seen in her room this morning had shocked him into this state. There was no question that Angela Bower could fend for herself and fight off someone if she needed to. Which left him wondering what the hell had happened last night after he'd gone upstairs to watch Pinnoccula with Sam.
When he'd last seen Angela she'd been ready to use that knife on Michael like Jason Voorhees from Friday the 13th. He couldn't understand what had led her from that level of anger to going to bed with him. He understood the allure of angry sex. He was a man and had plenty of arguments with Marie that had ended up with them using their bodies to communicate what their words couldn't but he'd loved her. All signs had pointed to that not being the case with Angela, and yet, here they were.
"Dad, you're supposed to beat the eggs, not mug them."
He brushed off Sam's comment with one of his own sharp witted retorts then served the kids their eggs, making sure they each had enough before he heard her enter the kitchen and turned to look at her. He'd seen the robe hanging in her closet. He wasn't particularly surprised she'd have something like that. But there was a difference between seeing something like that on a hanger or on a mannequin and seeing it on her. She was still practically glowing with the aura of a woman who had found sexual release and he did everyhing he could to avoid checking her out in that robe. A woman like didn't become president of a company by not being observant, and he didn't want to get caught looking at what was clearly not available. Or was it? The whole thing was too damn confusing for him, but he knew she'd catch onto his attitude quickly as he snarked at her in a low murmur, "I'll bet."
"What was that?" The drawl of her own attitude was present as she met him by the stove.
"Nothing. Nothing, Angela. Would you like some eggs?" He decided as he did everything he could to avoid staring at her that he needed to put on a good face for the kids. They didn't need to know what he'd seen and he was certain that Angela would agree with him.
"No, Tony. You know I always have just juice and coffee."
"Yeah, I know, but I figured this morning you might have an appetite." He couldn't help but to take one final dig at her, and that ended up being the one to get her going. As they tensely began to whisper, he'd managed to keep his cool… until she shushed him like he was a child. He hadn't been shushed like that since he was a kid on Pitkin Avenue and he sure as hell wasn't going to let that slide now. "You know me. Hear no evil, see no evil, speak-a no evil."
She was going to kill him.
She hadn't slept well. The three trysts between the sheets with Michael aside, she'd stayed up most of the night trying to gather her thoughts. Michael had a point about the whole thing. They weren't doing anything wrong. It didn't look good on paper and she was sure her mother would have something to say when she found out but what the'd done was what millions, billions of married people all over the world did. The only thing that could be a sticking point for anyone was the status of their marriage. Nothing they'd done had come close to deserving Tony's jab about being evil. She narrowed her eyes at him as she whirled on him. "What do you mean, evil?"
"Look, I may be way out of line here, but I don't want to see you get hurt. I just think you're moving a little too fast."
"Tony, we're married!" Michael's words from the night before continued to ring in her mind as she turned to face him. Her voice was louder than she would've liked but the point needed to be stressed to him.
"Yeah, but you're engaged to be divorced."
She wished she could've been more irritated with him, but the big, fat, dope was right. As usual, Tony's direct, plaintive argument had cut through all of the bullshit narratives she'd been spinning and that Michael had been feeding her and reminded her of exactly what was happening. She sighed as she gave up the act that things were completely fine and normal and decided to let him in. It couldn't get much worse than it was right now. Her voice was soft as she accepted the glass of orange juice from his hand into her own. "Well, last night, I don't know what happened. One minute I was asking him to sign the divorce papers and the next minute, it seemed inappropriate." She shrugged as she picked up the coffee pot.
"Oh, inappropriate, huh? Well, I just hope you know what you're doing."
"So do I." The problem was that she didn't know. She hadn't known for the last several hours and for a woman who craved control over everything around her, that didn't make her happy. It wasn't until the hot coffee washed over her fingers that she realized she'd poured coffee into her orange juice and had made a mess on the stove. She muttered a soft curse as she took her glass to the sink and dumped it as Michael walked in. She met Tony's eyes for a fleeting moment before he was breezing over to the table to try to mitigate the kids and their questions. She'd just picked up the dish rag to go clean the stove when Michael had approached. She tossed it onto the counter after he passed. The next several moments passed with a growing friction passing between the three adults.
For the first time in her life she felt like Guinevere in Camelot. Still married to her husband and yet drawn to the white knight that had so easily made her feel like she was something more than just a wife. It was clear that Michael and Tony would never be friends. She wasn't surprised by that, but the tension between the two of them was startling to see. Jonathan's innocent inquiry about spending more time with his father and then the follow up comment that Samantha and Tony were family was enough to pull her from her thoughts and she immediately agreed. She had come to think of Samantha as her own daughter in many ways, and Tony was special to her too. She knew them well enough to know that they were being polite and declining the invitation to allow her and Jonathan time with Michael; but the reality was she didn't know how much she wanted that.
It didn't much matter though. Michael had finished his juice then had volunteered to take Jonathan to school while Sam decided to catch a ride with Marci. Once they were alone the silence between her and Tony felt heavy with uncertainty. She'd gone up to change and by the time she was dressed and ready to leave for the office, he was nowhere to be found. The van was gone. No note left behind. She'd driven herself to the train station and had spent the next 10 hours of the day forcing herself to focus on work and clients, instead of the train wreck that was waiting for her at home.
Dinner with Michael had been lovely. She couldn't remember the last time Jonathan had jabbered on and on and on about what was going on in his life. It was clear that Michael brought the best out of him and it was hard for Angela to not take that personally. She'd spent the night worrying her lower lip between her teeth so much that she was sure she'd tasted blood at one point. Still had so many questions and doubt bit she couldn't deny that it was intoxicating to have her family back together again. It felt like everything she'd ever wanted. She didn't know what magic the jungle had worked on him. He'd come back as exactly the man she'd always wanted him to be. He was an attentive father. He was proud of what she'd accomplished and her career. Part of her wondered if the separation had led to him rediscovering what it was that made him want her in the first place. Perhaps they had had to go through the time apart to come back to together. Jonathan had fallen asleep on the car ride home and after they'd tucked him into bed together, instead of letting him head to the stairs, she'd slid her fingers between his and paused at her bedroom door. As she tugged him in behind her, she reassured him that Jonathan was a deep sleeper and reminded him that Tony and Samantha were out for the night with their own plans.
"So we've got the house to ourselves?" His voice was low and seductive as he watched her reach behind her back and lower the zipper on her dress until the fabric grew slack on her lean form.
She grinned as she nodded and leaned up to kiss him, her hands sliding over his shoulders and guiding his sport coat down his arms until it puddled on the floor. "Might as well make the most of it, Mr. Bower."
And I won't be denied by you, the animal inside of you
Oh, oh, I want some more
Oh, oh, what are you waiting for?
Take a bite of my heart tonight
- Animal / Cover
It was late when the blue van pulled into the driveway and his little girl was completely asleep curled up in the passenger seat. He paused for a moment, reminding himself of Angela's words just a few weeks earlier and sighed. With the return of the man of the house, Tony couldn't help but wonder what was going to happen with him and Samantha. He'd been comfortable enough to believe that they were okay after seeing Angela's streak of rage over Michael's return Wednesday night but now, 24 hours later, he had to admit that he was feeling uneasy. He didn't want to see Sam lose another mother figure and he hoped to God that they wouldn't end up living out of a hotel room or something if things took a turn.
He climbed out of the van and curled his daughter into his arms, then carried her into the house and up to her bedroom. The lights were all off, every bedroom door was closed, and he moved quietly, making sure he wouldn't wake Angela or Jonathan from their peaceful slumber by being a big clod. He tucked Samantha in, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead then slipped out of the room. He waited until he heard the soft thump of the door hitting the door frame before he started across the hall.
A muffled giggle broke the silence and he paused mid-step. Had he imagined it? He waited one more moment before there was a second giggle followed by a deep moan then a loud shout. He found himself wishing for the ground beneath him to open up and swallow him whole as the realization of what he'd just heard flooded him. He bit the side of his fist then rushed for his bedroom, knowing that no amount of noise he made would compete with the noises they were making.
The following morning, he'd come down to find Michael and Angela already at the breakfast table. Angela was gazing at him like he was a Grecian God and Michael was wrapped up in the newspaper. A fresh pot of coffee was on the stove and Tony made a beeline directly for it. He was almost half tempted to forget about breakfast at all but he knew he couldn't do that to the kids. He almost burned his mouth, drinking his coffee as quick as he did. The silence was finally broken as Mona walked in. "Last day before Spring Break!" She danced over to Tony and picked up a coffee mug. "Fill it up, ya big lug I'm gonna need all the caffeine I can get before this final."
"Aye, you've been studying real good. You're gonna do great. You'll see."
"Yeah. I know. I really earned my beach time."
She strutted toward the table then glared at Michael. "I see you're still around. What? Do we need antibiotics to get rid of you?"
"Mother!" Angela's attention was pulled from Michael as she gaped at Mona in shock. "That's horrible to say."
"No, actually it was really great. I've been waiting nine months to use that line."
Angela had just opened her mouth to argue when Jonathan and Samantha came racing in. Tony clapped his hands, drawing their attention. "Who wants eggs?" At their affirmative shouts he headed to the fridge and opened the door. With the eggs crackled and scrambled in a dish with his secret seasonings, he dumped them into the pan to begin to cook them. As he pushed them around the pan, he watched as Angela held Jonathan on her lap, while Mona and Samantha studied the scene in front of them with evident disgust on their faces. Mona breathed a sigh of relief as Michael stood and she eagerly claimed the free chair, but still kept a sharp eye on the man.
"Can I give you a ride into the city, Mrs. Bower?" He folded the newspaper and set it on the counter before turning to his wife and grinning.
"I'd love one, Mr. Bower."Angela giggled softly as he leaned down to kiss her and Tony was thankful that his back was turned so they couldn't see him physically gag as he relived the night before.
"And I'd love to eat my breakfast without all the added fake sugar." Mona's voice cut through the saccharine sweet moment as she blinked at the couple with her cheek propped up on her hand.
"Mother..." Angela sighed and turned to her, exasperated. Nothing was ever good enough it seemed. She was finally happy and with a man who loved her. Why wasn't that enough for her?
"Yeah, Mom. Come on. We're happy." Angela glanced up as Michael's hands found her shoulders, giving them a light squeeze.
"Yes. And... how nice for you. But you know what they say, one man's happiness is another man's misery. And this is mine." She stood up from the table and carried her coffee mug to the sink as Angela moved Jonathan to the chair and kissed him on the head.
"We love you, sweetheart."
"Love you too, Mom."
"Have a good day, Little Tiger."
"Thanks, Dad."
Mona groaned and glanced at Tony as the couple walked out. "Well this has been enough to ruin my appetite. Excuse me while I find the nearest bush to empty my stomach in." She rolled her eyes as she headed for the kitchen door to head out on her own, "Goodbye, tiny people!"
Tony carried the pan over and began to divvy up the eggs, telling the kids they'd have to hustle to make the bus. All the added excitement in the house and it seemed everyone forgot that they had schedules to attend to.
I can see you standin', honey
With his arms around your body
Laughin' but the joke's not funny at all
- Exile / Folklore
And yesterday I knew just what you wanted
When you came walkin' up to me with him
So I told you that I was happy for you
And given the chance, I'd lie again
Just to see you smile
- Just To See You Smile / Cover
Angela leaned back against the door to her bedroom and covered her mouth with her hand. It seemed almost too good to be true the way things were falling back into place. It seemed, for once, that fate was working to her advantage. She had everything she could've ever wanted. A dream job, dream house, the perfect husband and son, and a best friend and all but adopted daughter. Barbie wished she had it as good as Angela Bower. She fluffed her hair off her shoulders as she started to change, peeling her layers of work clothes off and pulling on a black and white plaid shirt and black jeans. It was still light enough and early enough in the day that they may be able to make some headway in the garage carving a space out for Michael's film gear and whatever else he'd acquired on his trips.
She couldn't believe that 2 days ago she'd been ready to throw in the towel on her marriage and now, here they were talking about him moving back in and trying again. Dinner had been a celebration as far as she and Michael and Jonathan were concerned. Mona had left with a 'friend' to head for the airport and Tony and Sam were unusually quiet. She made a mental note to check in on them both as she French braided her hair, then grabbed a box of old clothing from her closet. She'd been meaning to donate it for months, and now, with Michael returning, it seemed like the perfect time. She headed down the stairs, singing to herself and headed into the living room, relieved to see Tony as she set the box down on the coffee table. "Oh Tony, I thought maybe we could start our spring cleaning early."
"Sure, squeeze the last drop of blood out of the old workhorse."
She breathed a soft sigh of laughter as she turned to look at him. "I just thought if we cleaned the garage, we could store Michael's stuff there." She didn't know why he was being so dramatic about it. She wasn't asking him to do it by himself. She wanted to help and planned to get Michael to do his share as well.
"I mean, as soon as my stuff's out of the way, there will be plenty of room."
She paused for a moment, as her eyebrows knit together. "What are you talking about?"
"Didn't Michael tell you? He let me go."
Confusion etched itself deeper into Angela's eyes as she studied him. What the hell was going on? "Let you go where?"
"Anywhere I want, Angela. Get it up to speed. I'm out, I'm fired, I'm canned."
The blood in her veins turned to ice as she stared at him. Slowly, the anger that had been so prevalent two days ago began to reappear. That son of a- "Who does he think he is?"
"Your husband, remember?" As Tony mimicked Michael's ridiculous performance of the wedding march from the day he arrived, he failed to notice the way that Angela wasn't laughing. In fact, the longer she stood there looking at him, the more serious she got.
"Well, that doesn't give him the right to- Don't worry. I'll take care of this." She was going to give Michael Bower a piece of her mind. Second chance or not, he didn't get to come into the house that was defined as legally hers in their separation paperwork, and start making decisions. She started to step around him, ready to gather her coat and purse to head to the hotel.
"No, hey, Angela, wait." She turned to look at him as he opened his hands at his sides and shrugged. "You know, he's right. I don't belong here." It was baffling to her. In less than 10 minutes she'd gone from feeling on top of the world and completely untouchable to feeling like the rug had been pulled out from under her. The roller coaster of emotions left her dizzy and all she wanted to do was rewind time and stop Michael from talking to Tony. She should've guessed that something like this was going to happen when she agreed to him moving back in, but she'd never dreamt he'd do it behind her back without speaking to her first. Tony was a part of this family. He'd become more than a housekeeper months ago and suddenly the idea of 3344 Oak Hills Drive without his presence felt like a nightmare. "Angela, not many people get a second chance at marriage. It's happening for you and you don't need some hairy Italian in an apron hanging around screwing it up."
There was no mistaking the meaning of his words. He'd never get a second chance with Marie, and he didn't want to take this one away from her. Still, she'd come to rely on Tony, on their talks, and on his support. He was the calm in the storm for her. "Tony, you can't leave."
"Why not? "
Because I think I'm starting to…. She froze as the realization hit her like a semi-truck. I'm starting to have feelings for you. She felt breathless. Oh my God. Panic started to well within her chest as she looked at him. Oh God, what the hell am I doing? No, no. He's waiting for an answer. I have to say something. Anything…. "Well… Who's going to save us from Richard Welling and his ballistic snowballs?" She wiped her sweaty palms on the back of her pants, hating the lame excuse that had come up out of nowhere to save her from stuttering like an idiot.
"Look, Angela, if you don't fire me, I've got to quit. I've got to."
"I… Whoo…. I don't know what to say." Anything other than what you just thought 2 seconds ago, Angela. She blinked as her eyes grew glassy. This wasn't what she wanted. It wasn't what she wanted at all and yet, the only thing she could hear was an inner voice that sounded more like Mona than she cared to admit mocking her and reminding her that she'd made her bed and now she had to lie in it. She agreed to whatever conditions he wanted mindlessly. He could've asked for the Jaguar, the the sofa, and half her 401K for all she knew. The only thing she could focus on was the the sudden and deep emptiness she felt at the idea of not seeing him every day. "I'll miss you."
"Hey, we're going to keep in touch."
She knew what that meant. They'd keep in touch for a month, then it would slowly taper off and within six months he'd be one step above a stranger. The thought broke her heart but she forced a smile and nodded. "Right. Right, we're going to keep in touch." She extended her hand to him, awkwardly. He mirrored the gesture for a moment, then pulled her into a hug. Relief flooded her veins as she clung to him, letting him pull back just a fraction for her to meet his eyes as a tear broke free from her left eye. She sighed and took a step back. "I uh… " She cleared her throat and wiped at her cheek. "I'm going to take this box out to the garage. You uh… take the rest of the night off. You've earned it and I bet Sam would love to go see a movie with you or something." She grabbed the box forms he table and carried it out to the garage as fast as her feet could ferry her. The door to the garage slammed shut behind her as she dropped the box of clothing to the concrete floor and pressed her hands to her abdomen as she began to sob into the silence.
Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you
And I will hold on to you
Please don't ever become a stranger
Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere
- New Year's Day / Reputation Era