Chapter 12
Ivan P.O.V.
The hotel room was crowded with people. Everyone was smoking and drinking. All except Ivan. The winner of his first big fight was sitting alone on the hotel couch. "Chto ty teper´ duyesh´sya? Ty vyigral! Ty ne dovolen?"
(What are you sulking about now? You won! Aren't you satisfied?) Ludmilla taunted him but Ivan ignored the drunken woman.
All he could think about right now was Alexa. The dear girl next door. The girl who saw the good in him and the girl he was sure to lose forever after tonight.
None of this had been planned. He had not intended to be so brutal, but after all the insults and taunts, the American had it coming.
„Ivan", Nikoli began to pronounce his toast. „Chtoby Ivan i amerikantsy, nakonets, pochuvstvovali, chto Rossiya luchshe! Pobol´she by pobed!"
(To Ivan and to the Americans finally getting a taste that Russia is better! Here's to many more victories!) Ludmilla just grins at her husband as she raises her glass and takes a big sip before turning back to Ivan. "Such a shame. She was cute. I can see why you're so fascinated with her and why she is with you... oh sorry I mean true of course. After you almost killed her little friend I'm sure she'll never forgive you!" She laughs as she sits down next to Ivan. "But don't worry," her hand slides up and down his leg, "you can have fun with me."
That's all Ivan needs. He almost jumps up from the couch and goes over to the minibar where unopened bottles of vodka are still waiting to be consumed. Ivan's thoughts are only about the fight. "If he dies, he dies," why did he say that! It's not like he didn't mean it, but when he thinks about how Alexa looked at him. He can't get her look out of his mind and he was in the army after all. The pure despair in her big eyes that were full of tears. Those beautiful eyes that looked up at him, almost pleading.
He couldn't stand those images anymore and even less could he stand for a second the thought that Alexa really will hate him forever. His hand reaches for the vodka bottle and opens it. He looks at it for a second and images of his drunken father come up, but at that moment he doesn't care that he refuses alcohol for a reason. The glass skips Ivan and takes a good sized gulp straight from the bottles in pure desperation just for a minute to forget the look pleading look on Alexa's face.
Alexa´s P.O.V.
„Ivan?" He´s standing in the door and just looks at me. He´s dressed in Jeans and a black T-Shirt. The smell of collone and alcohol hits my nose as I can´t take my eyes off of him. „Ivan?"
„Can I come in?" he slurs. Is he drunk, I ask myself.
He doesn´t even wait for my respond and just steps inside making me take a step aside. I´m not sure what to say or how to act. The only thing that goes through my mind are his words and his fist, how he hits Apollo's face again and again.
"What are you doing here?", I ask him. My tone lets me hear that I don't want to see him. He flinches at my words. "Had to see you"
"You have now. There's the door!", I don't even manage to say a sentence without my voice breaking off and tears coming.
"I didn't mean to hurt you!" For a second I stand there rooted to the spot. Is he trying to make a complete fool of me now. "Me?" I ask, aghast. "You didn't mean to hurt me?" he just looks at me.
I realize that he's clearly drunk, which makes me immediately think about how much he must have drunk to reach such a state, but I immediately push these thoughts out of my head. He doesn't deserve to have me worrying about him.
"What about Apollo?! You almost killed him!", I yell at him by now. He takes a step toward me. I take one back. This goes on until my back almost touches the wall. "Ivan, don't," I warn him.
"I didn't mean to, but Lexa, I am not sorry. Creed got what he deserved. He is a pathetic little man with too much of a smart mouth and I just did what he bounced with all the time."
I stand rooted to the spot. Ivan's head so close to mine. I can't believe what he actually just said. Drunk or not, that doesn't justify it. I feel my anger take over me and before I can stop it, my palm slaps against his cheek.
Ivan abruptly straightens up and his hand strokes his cheek. His eyes are black, just like after the fight. I swallow. "Ivan," before I can apologize, I realize how stupid my action just was. Before I know it, Ivan grabs me by the neck and pushes me against the wall. My breath stops for a moment in shock. When I open my eyes to look at him, I only see his fist flying towards me.
I squeak when I see Ivan's fist in the wall just next to my head. More tears spurt from my eyes. I can't believe this just happened. That's when Ivan seems to come around as well, realizing what he's done. His eyes widen and panic is reflected in them. He breaks away from me and steps back. I feel myself sliding down the wall onto the floor.
"Please go" my voice only a slight tremble.
„Lexa, pozhaluysta, prosti menya." (Lexa, please forgive me) His eyes are still wide open and he looks so desperate. Part of me just wants him to hold me in his arms and promise me that everything will be fine. But it won´t … probably never again. „Ivan please", I beg him desperately. „Just go. I cry.
He looks broken as he takes a few steps away from me. He walks to the door but turns araound to give me one last look. Almost as if he wanted to save my face.
Then he turns and leaves. He leaves the room and thus my life. I stay right where I am and cry. I cry and cry until the sun comes up.