Wife of the Wolf, Husband of the Sun
Chapter Forty-Three.
The rain was still pouring down, turning the dirt of the training ground of the New Castle into mud, Jaime hated it. He had heard that it snowed often in the North and he had been prepared for that but because White Harbour was near the sea it was warmer than it would be further inland, not warm it was still colder than Jaime had ever been in his entire life, but it was warm enough that any snow there might have been turned into freezing rain.
So Jaime was cold and wet and he wanted to stab someone with his sword, he wanted to get back on the ship that had brought him to this frozen land and sail back to Lannisport and the Rock as soon as possible. The Rock could be damp and cold but even in Winter the sun would at least stay out for longer than half an hour.
He could tell that the knights who had accompanied him and Elia to the North were eager to get back to the Westerlands as well, many of them had already come down with colds and chills and shivered and shook in the night no matter how warm the barracks of the New Castle were. Jaime had been given his own chamber, which he had noticed was on the other side of the castle from where Elia's was, it was large enough and well furnished as to avoid any insult but even so being in it gave Jaime an ill feeling in his bowels.
He should not have attended Elia in the birthing room, it had been a mistake and he knew that it had been. It had been foolish, he could almost hear his lord father's voice in the back of his mind, telling him that Lannisters did not act like fools and none would make such a mistake before him, not only being in the birth chamber of a woman when there was nothing that he could do, it was a woman's trail to endure but being in the birthing chamber of a woman that was married to someone else.
And then he went and-
He was not going to finish that thought, he was not going too. It had been a mistake, he had never thought that he would be with a woman while she was birthing her children and it had filled him with many strange feelings that he had never felt before and when he looked into that face and seen the pure love that only a mother could have for her children...
He had been confused, that was all. He felt sorry for Elia Martell, he was partly the reason that she had been forced away from her husband and been forced to give birth among strangers. Off all the people in White Harbour, she knew him the best and she had asked him to not to leave, to stay with her. He was doing her a kindness and that was the end of it.
He hadn't even gone to see her since the birth, he had spent most of his time since then speaking with the knights he had brought with him and sparring with them when he wasn't talking to them and speaking to the captains of the ships who were also eager to return to the Westerlands, mainly from what he gathered to avoid his father's wrath.
Jaime was concerned about that, the deal Elia had made with Lord Tywin had been that as soon as she had been returned to the North, Jaime would be allowed to return. They weren't keeping him here, Lord Wyman and his cousin had made it quiet clear that he had both the leave to go and that none would try and stop them.
And yet, for some reason he found that he could not muster up the will to finally leave, he knew that he had too of course. He wasn't the sharpest mind when it came to the game that the high lords played but he knew that it would look bad if he was still sticking around, he knew that he should have left already but for some reason he couldn't find it in himself to go, thus he had made up the excuse that he would not leave until he saw that Elia was finally reunited with her husband as that was what they had set out to do.
He had tried to turn his thoughts on to Cersei, if anything could convince him to return to the Westerlands then it was the thought of his sweet sister but then he remembered that Cersei wasn't in the Westerlands, she was at Dragonstone with her sliver dragon prince and she was carrying his child.
The thought of that made him seethe, the thought of the dragon prince with his head buried in between Cersei's thighs, pumping away to fill her with his child, Cersei's belly growing with a child that should be his if there was any sort of justice in the world. But of course he knew that there wasn't any, Aerys wouldn't sit the throne or be able to do the things he did to his wife if there was.
And when his thoughts of Cersei didn't turn into what her dragon prince would be doing to her right now, they would turn to Elia. He would picture her standing in her chamber room with one of those two babes she had born for her lord husband, and gods he wanted to stab someone even more now, standing in front of the window as she feed him from her breasts, a gentle smile playing on her face.
Cersei was still the most beautiful woman that Jaime had ever known, she was the most beautiful woman in the world, he had always told her so and he had always meant it but he could not deny that Elia was beautiful as well and she was smart and surprising funny as well and when she was cross her brow would crease and when she was happy-
He was so utterly fucked.
He slumped down onto a bench and the rain was indifferent to his poor temper, continuing to hammer against his bent head, the moisture rolling down his neck and damping the inside of his doublet, he supposed that he should find some cover as his father would be even more worth with him if he ruined the fine garment, he had paid a tailor of Lannisport a hundred gold dragons for it.
Jaime heard the sound of footsteps approaching and he looked up to see someone that gave him a start, Eddard Stark. A dozen emotions struck him then, anger, fear and concern seemed to be chief among them. The anger he didn't understand, he had nothing to be angry about when it came to Ned Stark, the fear was strange as well because that was an emotion as strange as any could be to him and if Jaime was ever going to be afraid of anything then he doubted it would be the second son of a lord, whose blood was meant to be like ice water.
And the concern...Well, strange as it was, the concern was for Ned Stark himself, and for Elia. He imagined by now that word that he had stayed in her birthing chamber had reached the Quiet Wolf's ears and while he might have ice water for blood but what man wouldn't be angry about that? Jaime knew that he would be, he already was when he thought about Cersei baring children for Rhaegar, children that should be his if the gods had a lick of the kindness that they were meant to have.
He had to wonder how he had reacted once he had known, he didn't seem the sort of man that would even consider laying his hands on a woman but when a man was consumed by anger, anything could happen then. Men could also pretend that they were honourable and good and just and kind and behind closed doors could be the greatest monsters to ever soil the Seven Kingdoms.
A strange sort of determination took him then, if he found that Eddard Stark had harmed his wife then he was going to kill him. He was a knight, he was sworn to protect women and if Elia needed to be protected from her husband then so be it. It didn't matter that he was in the North, in a city controlled by Stark bannermen, he would kill him if he had laid a finger on her that he shouldn't have.
But why did he care so much? He cared because it was his duty, he was sworn to protect women and children and those who could not protect themselves. He swore a vow to protect them, that was why he cared and it was the only reason that he cared.
But Stark was apparently not as wild as his elder brother was meant to be, even here up in the North it was impossible to keep rumours about an heir who had seemed to make it his mission in life to bed every single fair faced woman that he meet, for the moment it was just rumors that no one was taking too seriously but the fact that talk like that was allowed to spread did not look good for Lord Rickard.
Still, according to the word around the city, he had still wound up married to Catelyn Tully. He was surprised that old Hoster Tully would have allowed his daughter to marry a man that had such rumours in the air around him but so long as their was no bastard, no stain on that precious Stark honour, then rumors could spread as they liked.
Jaime did have to wonder if there was another reason that Hoster Tully had allowed the match to go ahead, aside from the fact that marrying his eldest daughter to the heir of a great house was not only to be expected but would be a prized match, there were some rumours about the Lady Catelyn and some ward of Lord Tully that had been living at Riverrun since he was a boy, in fact some of the rumours said that ward has taken both of the Tully girls to bed.
Jaime personally didn't believe any of them, there were always rumours about highborn maids when there were men who weren't their brothers in their home and he had met both Catelyn and Lysa Tully when they and their father had come to Casterly Rock, he could still remember the steady stream of knights and bannermen of House Tully streaming through the Lion's Mouth, the golden light of the sun making their silver armour glow. The Tully girls both seemed like any other noble man's daughters, the elder one seemed to be fully aware of both her beauty and the prestige that came with being the eldest daughter, she didn't seem stupid enough to give her maidenhead to someone who it would not be advantageous to give it too.
The younger girl wasn't as beautiful as her elder sister but she was certainly not horrid to look upon, she had the same long red hair and bright blue eyes, but she was only pretty when compared next to her sister. She seemed more likely to give her maidenhead to someone who paid her petty complements he supposed but considering that his father was considering marrying him to either of those two girls, well, he wouldn't do that if he thought that those rumours were true.
Tywin Lannister would allow no stain on the Lannister family to show, as far as he was aware his father was still considering marrying him to Lysa Tully and Jaime cursed in his mind as he considered being married to her, she was pretty but she was also insipid and moony eyed, he wanted someone stronger than that. Someone who would be strong and speak her mind and give him council when he needed it and refused to just lay back do her duty and take the injustices heaped upon her.
Someone like Cersei. Someone like Elia.
He wasn't honestly starting to consider ripping his hair out if he didn't get these vile, treasonous thoughts out. He cared little and less for the Dornish princess, he swore it. He had done her a wrong and he had tried to make up for it and that was the end of it, he swore it so to all the gods, old and new and drowned and across the sea and in the sky, he swore it.
Ned Stark had seen him and didn't seem at all concerned that Jaime was at war with himself as he approached. Jaime let out a breath and placed a smirk on his face as he turned to look the second born son of Lord Rickard Stark with all the strength that he could muster. He was Ser Jaime Lannister, son of Lord Tywin Lannister, heir to the Rock and a knight of the realm. He wouldn't cringe from a wolf pup.
A lion didn't bow to a wolf.
"Lord Stark, it's been a long time." Jaime spoke with a calm ease that he didn't feel as the rain seemed to pound down heavier than it did a moment before, was that a rumble of thunder that he heard in the distance. "I hear that you're a father now, twin sons. I offer you my congratulations, a heir and a spare all from one pregnancy. You must be very proud."
Eddard Stark's face seemed almost like a statue for a moment, the rain rolling of his long face did not seem to bother him. He barely seemed to even notice it, after a while the stone cracked and his lips began to move. "Aye, both of the boys seem strong to me and my lady wife is already recovering. A blessed day indeed, it seems to me Ser Jaime that I owe you a debt. It was you who brought my wife back to me and in her hour of need you stayed in her birthing chamber to aid her through her pain, though I must confess though I know little of how southron boys are educated I did not think that midwifery was part of your education."
Jaime felt his first beginning to clench into a fist once again, if he wanted to banter with him then Jaime was more than willing to return the slaps. "Oh, it isn't. But your wife was all alone, I do not doubt that the Manderlys are a loyal house to house Stark nor would they would wish to harm your wife but she didn't know any of them, a woman's trial is a strange thing but having been one of few men to see it first hand I can attest to you it is just as terrifying as any battle that I have ever been in, if not more so. She knew me quiet well, she wanted a familiar face to offer her comfort, you were very far away and those babes were coming out."
Ah, there it was. The younger Stark was calm and cold unless his anger was raised and the man wasn't a complete idiot, though Jaime wasn't exactly one for being subtle. The words he was not saying would have driven even the calmest man into a rage, not a thing had occurred between him and Elia when she had been a guest of his family but Ned Stark didn't know that and he enjoyed the power that making him angry afforded him.
The man was shivering with rage although he was doing his best to hide it and Jaime would congratulate him on his composure, unless you were actually looking for signs that the man was angry then you wouldn't be able to truly tell, you could easily assume that the shivering was just do to the cold. The only other signs were the slight flaring of his nostrils and the way that the fingers of his left hand were slightly starting to curl into a first.
He won't congratulate him of course, it was truly strange how much he enjoyed making this one specific man angry. A tiny part of him, that he was truly trying his best to ignore, wondered if perhaps he made the man angry enough then he might just attack him. If he was attacked under the roof of another lord then Jaime would have every right to defend himself after all and he was wearing his sword belt.
An angry man was a careless man, if Eddard Stark charged at him like angry men were as like to do then it would be all too easy for him to free his blade and bury it in to Stark's guts. The thought pleased him a little but then he thought of Elia, left alone with her husband dead and two children and it was her who had insisted that he come with her to the North, how would it look to Ned Stark's family if the man that had been in the birthing room with Elia also wound up killing her husband.
At best she would wind up losing her head for it, at worst she would lose her head but she would be tortured first. Quiet apart from Elia he doubted that he or the men that came with him would be able to leave the North alive and knowing his father he would not take his death well and soon enough fields of crimson would sprout in the Westerlands and soon after, Lannister armies would be marching on the North as the great fleet of Lannisport sailed to burn White Harbour to ashes.
It suddenly occurred to Jaime that he was making a habit of nearly starting wars, he did really have to stop doing that.
He crossed his arms and leaned black against the cold stone wall, trying his best to take on a gentler tone. He was not the best when it came to apologising, nor could he actually say the words as that would entail admitting that he was at fault and had been trying to insult him and he could not do that. "In truth, to give due credit it was not me that brought Princess Elia here. She was able to do that all by herself."
A frown appeared on the North man's face but the anger had faded, replaced with a healthy dose of confusion. Who it was more healthy for Jaime could not rightly say. "What do you mean, speak the truth Lannister. This not court or the South, we have no place for double talk her."
Jaime could now safely say he was certain that Elia did not desire so fiercely to return to her husband for his conversational skills, but Jaime decided to indulge the man and cut straight to the point. "I was with my father, my brother, my uncles and my aunt in my father's solar and we were discussing a family matter. Suddenly, she stormed in with the maid my father gave her trailing behind her, past the guards and practically ordered my father to arrange a boat for her to carry her back to the North."
"Of course, as my Father himself pointed out to her, he had no reason to do such a thing and if my father had sent her home to you then all that would happen is that it would draw the King's wrath down on to the Westerlands and if it came to war and we would lose then we were all as like to die. But then, your wife outfoxed the proud lion. If he did not place her on a boat, she would throw herself from her chamber window into the Sunset Sea."
A chocked gasp escaped from Ned and for the first time since Jaime had seen him the mask finally shattered and for the first time Jaime felt a stab of pity for him, the man had clearly not been expecting to hear that and looked a cross between terrified, angry and devastated that his wife had been considering such a drastic action. He swallowed roughly around a knot that had formed in his throat and spoke, his voice raspy. "Go on."
Jaime obliged. "She was smart, she knew that no matter how hard my Father might try he wouldn't be able to keep news of her death from escaping Casterly Rock, not for long. And when it got out her brothers would raise their banners, your father would raise his, your foster brother and foster father would raise their banners for you, she seemed to have forgotten that your brother was going to marry the daughter to the Lord Paramount of the Riverlands so that would bring their banners as well. But, the king would raise his banners as well against him as it was his decree that Elia and I were to be married."
"Have you ever meet Mace Tyrell? I have, he's a grasping man. He would love any chance to unseat my father and get closer to the king, have my sister thrown aside and have any daughter of his, should have one from flopping on top of his poor wife, become queen instead. So, he would raise his banners for the King as well. Every single kingdom united against the Westerlands, my Father can't fight that and win."
"So that was the choice your wife presented to my father, send her back North or face total and certain annihilation." Jaime took in a deep breath, the air might be cold but it was fresher than most. "A remarkable woman, your wife. It reminded me of something that my sister might have done, she's very good at getting what she wants. For as long as I can remember she's wanted to be a queen, and now she's well on her way to becoming one."
"True enough. I...I thank you for telling me this, I do not think that Elia would." The grim man bit his lip and seemed to be mulling over whether or not to ask him a question, after a moment he found his courage. "It is safe to say that he agreed to this, why would he send you of all people to come with him?"
"He didn't, your wife asked me to see her safely back. Before you start to frown again, she only asked me to come with her because she knew that my father would never risk anything happening to me. If I was with her than he would try no tricks nor would she come to any danger as my father would allow no danger to come to me." It was less out of any love his father might bare him and more for how valuable he was, he might have another son in Tyrion but his father hated him and he wanted his line to continue to hold the Rock.
A weight seemed to be lifted from the other man then, as if Jaime's words had completely disproved the idea that his wife might hold any affection for him, which was fair enough as Jaime knew that she did not as he bore no affection for her. At the very least, not of that sort. "At any rate, I think I shall speak to the ship's captain tonight and make preparations to make the voyage back to the Westerlands tomorrow, my father will be getting worried and we don't want a war. I wonder is I might ask you a favour, beforehand?"
"If it is within my power to grant, ask."
"I wonder if I might say goodbye to Princess Elia? It seems unfair to leave without saying goodbye after the journey it took us to get here, I would need you to show me the way of course as I can not remember where her chamber is." Jaime thought for a moment that he had asked too much as the stone mask came back up for a moment but soon after Elia's husband nodded and turned towards the keep.
It didn't take them long to get inside, walking through the corridors. He was certain that plenty of maids saw them and that soon there would be plenty of gossip, there always was and he was sure the fact that he had been in Elia's birthing chambers had birthed a thousand stories of it's own. There were too many stories about them, he was sure of that.
He should have said no to Cersei when she asked him to kill Elia, he hadn't planned on doing it but he should have convinced her to leave it and because he hadn't and he wanted her to be happy, more than anything in this world, everything had gotten confused.
They arrived in front of the chamber door and with a look Ned Stark ordered him to wait outside as he stepped into the chamber, Jaime tried his best to ignore his desire to press his ear to the door and try to hear what was being said inside of the room. After a few moments the door opened and Ned invited him to step inside the room, he couldn't help but let out a tiny hiss of breath at what he saw.
Elia...well, she looked terrible. There wasn't any other way of putting it, her curly hair laid limp around her face and she was much paler than she had been. She was sitting up in bed but she needed a mountain of pillows at her back to keep her sitting up as she could not do so herself, heavy bags were under her eyes and though she did smile when she saw Jaime it was not strong. "Hello Jaime, thank you for coming to see me."
"I will give you two a moment to speak." Ned said though he did not seem happy to be leaving the two of them alone, he turned and walked out of the room and shut the door behind him. Once he had left Jaime stepped forward and stopped at the foot of the bed.
"Are you alright?"
Elia smiled at his question and laughed but her laughter soon turned into a raspy coughing fit that lasted too long for Jaime's taste but as soon as he was about to turn and run from the room to let Eddard in and go to find a maester the coughing stopped and Elia took in some heavy breaths. "I am quiet alright, please forgive me for that Ser Jaime. I am afraid that this bout of illness has taken me unawares, I am always ill but sometimes the severity differs. I was fine yesterday and yet today, I do not think I have the strength to climb out of this bed if my life depended on it."
"I'm sorry." Jaime apologised and he meant, he didn't think he would be able to cope with not even having the strength to get out of bed. He hated being stuck anywhere and when he had been a boy and had ever been struck down with a fever it had been a trial for the maester and the servants to keep him in bed so that he could recover properly.
"Are you somehow the cause of it? I do not think that you can be. You have nothing to be sorry for Ser Jaime, I promise you that if you did have something to be forgiven for then I would let you know, believe me I would." Elia said with a giggle and Jaime found that the noise made him smile, he did not try to fight it or to hide it. "I am used to this, tomorrow I shall be right as rain."
Jaime doubted somehow that would be the case, while she might be better than she was today he somehow doubted that you could recover completely from looking as though you were in the middle of the Stranger's embrace in the course of a day. He didn't say that of course. "I am glad to hear it, where are th-where are your children?"
He hadn't noticed until just now but there were no signs of any cribs and Elia had a sad smile on her face as she spoke. "When I started to feel unwell I asked that they be moved to the nursery, I won't be able to look after them when I am in this sort of condition and I do not want my coughing to wake them up. I do wonder though, will one of them be like me, will both of them? We take so much from our mothers and our fathers, hair and eyes and skin, whose to say we don't take illness too."
Tears began to flow down her cheeks and a tiny sob that made Jaime feel like a knife had been shoved into his heart escaped Elia's throat. "If that happened, if I did that to them...gods, I don't think I would be able to forgive myself. I don't think that I could." The tears didn't stop, they kept rolling down her brown cheeks and louder sobs began to escape.
The door opened and Ned Stark stood in the doorway, a hateful glare aimed at Jaime as he pushed past him and sat down on the edge of the bed and gently pulled Elia into his arms, rubbing her back and pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "It's alright my love, I'm here. I am here with you and I will never leave you again. Never, I swear that to you." He turned his gaze to Jaime and the glare was back in full force. "I think that you need to go."
Jaime nodded and half stumbled, half ran out of the chamber and began to run through the corridors. He made up his mind, he was going to go to the docks and speak to the captain right now, he wanted to be on his way home tonight.
He wanted to be as far away from this damn city, this damn country, as possible.
End of Chapter Forty-Three.
Welp, another chapter down and wow this was an emotional one, I don't think that Jaime is an okay place emotionally and as I think most of us that have read his chapters know, he can be pretty stubborn when it comes to denying things. I also don't think that we are going to be seeing Jaime for awhile, at least not as a POV character.
I think this chapter will take me over two hundred thousand words and as always I would just like to thank everyone who has followed, reviewed and favourited. Your words of praise and your words of constructive criticism, in equal measure, mean so very much to me and I hope there will be much more to come.
The next chapter will be Rhaegar POV and he is always so fun to write, not a favourite character but a favourite mindset. If that makes sense.
As always, follow, favourite and review if you enjoyed and I will see you next time.
Love,
Doctorwhofan12345.