CHAPTER 1

Hi. This one is a little something that I came up with when I was in a pretty bad mood. So if you see any kind of bashing, it wasn't intentional.

This is a done and dusted subject. Something I had no idea I even wanted to do. But I have no other option. I just wanted to get this off my chest.

Something in this series just bugged me. I don't begrudge any people's personal feelings. But Sarah telling Shaw her name just made me so mad. I mean, sure Chuck was changing. But if Chuck was losing himself, trying to be a spy so that he could be with her, and she had a problem with it, she must have spoken up about it. She just let him do it and complained about him changing. That's something I have no idea why the writers overlooked. So this is my way of trying to find a solution.

This takes place after Sarah told Chuck that she didn't trust him in Chuck versus the American Hero.

-Break-

"Well, I don't"

Chuck had no idea two words could hurt him so much. They had simply sucked the life out of him, and left him an empty husk. He felt like something was constricting his heart. A gut wrenching pain he could not find a way to get out of. Their relationship, while rocky, still contained a certain amount of trust. Chuck trusted Sarah with his life, his family, his friends and his everything. He had always trusted her. But it seemed suddenly that it was one sided. When he needed her to trust him, he suddenly found himself without any.

Chuck wasn't new to heartbreak. He had faced enough heartbreak to last many lifetimes. His parents leaving, Bryce's betrayal, Jill's multiple betrayals were well known. Sarah telling Shaw her name was the latest addition. But none of them compared to this moment, when Sarah, the woman he has been in love with for the better part of almost three years, tells him that she doesn't trust him.

He stared at her for a good ten seconds. She was starting to feel uncomfortable. Then all of a sudden, he started laughing. It wasn't a happy laugh, or a funny laugh. It was a laugh filled with anguish, tears, and heartbreak. He laughed for a good minute. As the laughter died down, the flow of tears increased. He had no idea what to say to her. But he needed to go before he said something he would regret. He turned and walked towards the exit slowly. At the door to Castle, he stopped and turned to Sarah, and said in a hoarse voice, "All the Best, Sarah." And he walked away.

Sarah was looking at him as he left. She was expecting so many different types of responses, ranging from begging to anger. But never for a minute did she expect this kind of answer. It was resignation. He had given up. It made her heart ache. But it also cemented her thought that he had changed. Her Chuck would not have given up. He would have fought till the very end. The fact that he hadn't said anything just added to the already present evidence.

She finished up her work at Castle and left to her hotel. She had to pack and leave for her next assignment. While she knew working with Shaw wasn't going to be anything like what she currently had, she had no other idea what to do. She sighed resignedly and started packing.

With Chuck

Chuck walked like a zombie to his apartment. He was still processing what had happened at Castle. The fact that Sarah didn't trust him was like a body blow. He did not what to do next. It was like everything was against him, and he had no idea how to even recover from this.

With Casey

Casey was looking at him from his apartment. He sighed in agony. The kid was down in the dumps. He had a good idea as to what had happened. Walker probably rejected him because he killed someone. He honestly thought Chuck would tell Sarah the truth to save their relationship. Looks like he underestimated the kid's loyalty to his friends. He knew he shouldn't do anything, but he cannot bear to look at the kid when he is like this. He would never admit it to anyone even if has threatened at gun point, but Casey respected the hell out of Chuck. Thrown into this world without any idea as to how to navigate it, the kid turned from a bumbling nerd to a somewhat competent spy. He considered him to be one of his only few friends. So he knew what he was going to do next.

Back with Chuck

He couldn't handle it anymore. The pain was killing him. If Sarah decided that he was not the Chuck she fell in love with, then there was no point in sitting around. He decided that the only way to escape the clutches of despair once more was to become the person she said he had become. He was going to try to turn off all his emotions. It was going to be very tough, but he had no other option.

He went to his room and called General Beckman from his computer. She answered in a few minutes.

"Agent Bartowski, what is the matter?"

He looked at her with a stoic gaze, "General when should I leave for Rome?"

She eyed him warily, "You are expected to be there in 2 days. Everything has been arranged. Have you decided on your partners? If I were to guess, I would say you are taking Agent Walker with you."

His eyes closed for a second before opening back to their emotionless state, "No General, Agent Walker will be working with Agent Shaw. But I have one person in mind for this. You may not like it, but he is our best bet. He knows everything there is to know about this project. He knows me well. We already have a good working relationship."

The General interrupted, "If you are suggested Grimes, then the answer is no."

"No General. Not Morgan. I am talking about John Casey. Please consider this request. He only did what he did to protect his daughter and her mother. Having him on this is much better than having to learn how to work with a new partner. In this war with the Ring, where we have no idea who the enemy is, having Casey with me will really be a bonus. I really don't trust anyone else. Maybe a demotion can be arranged." He pleaded.

General Beckman looked skeptical, but did agree that he had a valid point. No one knew how deep the Ring had penetrated in the intelligence community. They were at a junction were they cannot be liberal with trust. Casey might have broken the rules, but he was a true patriot and would give up his life rather than work against the country.

She sighed, "Alright Agent Bartowski. I will allow you take Casey on this. What about the female partner?"

He once again erected his stoic mask, "I would like to look at a list of 3 female agents, who are around the age of 28 to 35. I can verify their loyalty with the Intersect. They can be CIA, NSA or even DIA. They just need to be competent enough to gel with us."

Beckman looked at Chuck for a bit. He looked very sad. He may be erecting a mask of stoic calmness, but she has been in this business for decades. She could easily look behind the mask, and into the pain and heartbreak he was trying to hide. She would never admit it, but she had come to like this young man. He was like a breath of fresh air, in the cut throat world of espionage. The fact that she played a part in changing the embodiment of goodness into the spy that was before her, saddened her greatly, but she had a duty to her country. That does not mean she cannot make his life a bit easier though.

She asked him in a soft voice, "Chuck is everything fine?"

He looked at her, and finally allowed the agony he was feeling to be seen through his eyes. He shook his head. This was his punishment. He would face it head on.

He looked her in the eye and said, "I am fine General."

She looked at the determination in his eyes, and sighed, "Alright. Tomorrow morning at 1000 hours, there is a flight heading to DC at LAX. You and Major Casey will board that plane. At DC, you will collect your mission package, and other necessary items, and board a CIA jet to Rome the very same day. The list of agents will be sent to you shortly. Good Luck, Agent Bartowski".

She gave him a small smile, and disconnected the call.

Chuck sighed, 'and so it begins' he thought.

With Casey

He reached Sarah's hotel room and knocked on her door. He heard he walking to the door and she opened it.

"Hey Casey", she looked at him with surprise. She didn't expect him to come to her room.

"Hey", he said. After walking in he started looking around.

"Can I get you anything?" she asked.

"No it's fine. I wanted to tell you something about Bartowski. Something he neglected to tell you because it would cause problems for me."

Sarah was confused. What was he talking about? What problems?

"Look, if you came to vouch for him, it's not necessary. Nothing you say will change my mind. I cannot be with him now. He has changed too much"

Casey was starting to get angry. She was the one who was supposed to have faith in the kid. What happened to all the trust? Ever since Daniel Shaw set foot in Castle, everything went FUBAR.

"Huh, I thought you had feelings for the kid. Guess it was all a lie. The kid's a mess right now. I don't where his head his. When he gets like this he can be very unpredictable. And that is the kind of spy I hate."

Sarah just looked at him with a stoic gaze. She gave nothing away. While it made her angry when Casey said she didn't have feelings for Chuck, it doesn't help when she is actually trying to get rid of any feelings.

Casey once again started, "Well, I'll just tell you what I came to say. Whatever happens next is up to you."

He took a deep breath, and told her, "He didn't kill the mole"

TBC

Huh. I won't necessarily call this a cliffhanger because we all know what he was gonna say. But I am going to leave it here. It was originally going to be a one shot. But then I changed my mind.

See you soon.