Deadpool slowly opened his eyes, feeling some slight pain in the back of his head. The first thing he noticed was somepony sitting in front of him. He saw Madame Masque standing in front of him. He quickly realized he was looking down on her. Looking around, he saw that he was in a stone room, hanging from a wall, held by chains around his hooves. The only light in the room came from torches that were attached to the walls.
"Am I in a dungeon? I'll give you credit, I wasn't expecting to be locked up in a dungeon of all places," Said Deadpool, unfazed by where he was.
"You're finally awake. Good. I was beginning to fear that I would have to wait until morning to get to speak to you," Said Madame Masque.
"Sorry to keep you waiting. If you wanted a word with me, you could've just kept your men from knocking me out, and swing by my office instead. Visiting hours are from 9 to 5," Quipped Deadpool.
"So you have a sharp tongue. Just like…" Madame Masque seemed lost in thought, swishing around a glass of wine she was holding with her magic. "I bet you're wondering what somepony like you is doing here when we have a much more valuable hostage in the Princess."
"Actually, what I'm wondering about is why does this eerily look like the same dungeon I was in during a dream I had involving my marefriend," Replied Deadpool.
(Ha! Bottom!)
"In all seriousness, I'd thought that I also had some sort of value, considering that I'm-"
"Deadpool," Said Madame Masque, cutting Wade off. "Former mercenary turned ally of the bearers of the Elements of Harmony. I'm aware of who you are. When you used to go around killing criminals or pulling off jobs for a price, the different Maggia families were divided on whether you should be under their employment, or eliminated on sight. If it was even possible."
"It's not," Said Deadpool.
(Liar!)
(Like we would tell her that!)
"For the current situation, your marefriend has much more value long term than you do… At least to the Nefaria family. When I first laid eyes upon you, I couldn't help but be entranced by you," Said Madame Masque.
"Well, I do have that effect on ponies," Said Deadpool egotistically.
"I could see you for what you are: ugly, an outcast, broken…"
Madame Masque raised her right fore hoof up, and placed it on the side of her face, caressing her mask.
"Hey! That may be accurate, but that's not very nice!" Said Deadpool irritatedly.
Madame Masque swiftly removed her hoof from her face.
"You have a mask that I'm willing to bet you wear to hide not your identity, but your face from others," Said Madame Masque.
Madame Masque reached towards her utility belt. Hanging from it was Deadpool's mask. She grabbed his mask and showed it to him. Realizing that she had removed his mask while he was unconscious, he glared at her.
"Give that back! I have a brand, and unfortunately, it's not my face!" Said Deadpool angrily.
(Considering the fact we look like Freddy Krugger, we couldn't use our face for branding purposes without people confusing us with him.)
"Clearly this mask means a lot to you, yet you weren't wearing it at the casino. Why would you let your face be seen by everypony that was there tonight?" Asked Madame Masque. "Ponies who are judgmental, ostracizing, small-minded…"
Anger had nearly consumed her. Deadpool's mask shook in her trembling hooves. She took a deep breath, calming her down as instantly as her anger had appeared. Deadpool nervously watched Madame Masque, unsure if she would snap. When he felt like it was safe, he spoke up.
"Okay, I'll indulge you, and not because I'm afraid that if I don't comply, you'll put me in one of those stretching table things," Said Deadpool. "You're right, I wear that mask religiously. Normally, if someone asks me why I wear the mask, I would say it's because it makes me look cool. Don't get me wrong, I do think it does, but it's not why I wear it. I wear it because I don't want ponies to see my face. After I was disfigured by my cancer, everypony looked at me differently. Some looked at me out of utter shock. Surprised that somepony could look the way I did. Others looked at me out of pity. Well intentioned or not, I hated being seen as a victim. Then there is that small yet vocal collective of ponies who were disgusted by me. Whether they told me that to my face or if they gave me a look of absolute disgust, it hurt me all the same."
"Ponies would wonder why I wear a mask that would obviously draw attention to me if that would be what I want to avoid. If I didn't want anypony to see my face, then I wouldn't leave home. I choose to wear my mask because I would rather have ponies think I was weird or, at best, cool then to be seen as that fucking word… ugly."
"But tonight was different. I was with Twilight, the pony I love. Even though it was a shock at first, she and our friends looked past my scars to see me as the pony I am. They would encourage me to take the mask off. Although that may be because they both wanted me to not be afraid of showing my face in public, and don't think it is socially appropriate or it clashes with any normal clothing," Said Deadpool with a chuckle.
"Twilight, though, she loves me; scars and all. It's because I love her, why I was willing to go out in public tonight without wearing my mask. Since our first date, I learned that it doesn't matter how everypony would react to seeing, because in the end, the only pony who sees me is her."
Madame Masque looked at Deadpool, her mask making it seem as if she looked at him with total apathy. But if one were to look closely at the eyeholes, they would see tears welling up.
"...You're a lucky stallion. I wish the pony I love would think of me the same way the Princess and your friends do," Said Madame Masque, suppressing her sadness.
"I know he's a narcissist that walks the line between good and asshole, but I would think the reason-"
"I may not be able to have him, but I can have you instead," Said Madame Masque, cutting off Deadpool.
"...What?" Said Deadpool nervously.
"Whenever I need consolation for my own appearance, I can turn to you. With your help, maybe I can finally be rid of my only weakness, and prove that I am the one true heir to the Nefaria crime family," Said Madame Masque.
"... You want to hold me captive so I can be your therapist?!" Yelled Deadpool in disbelief.
"Of course you're empowered by your marefriend. Hopefully for both our sakes, she will prove to be useful," Said Madame Masque.
KNOCK! KNOCK!
Knocking could be heard from a wooden door on the opposite side of the room.
"Come in," Said Madame Masque, looking over her left shoulder.
The door opened, revealing one of Madame Masque's men. Light from a hallway cast into the room, creating a silhouette of the stallion across the floor and the lower half of a wall.
"I apologize for interrupting you, Madame, but Count Nefaria wants you to meet him in the throne room," Said the stallion.
"Can it wait?" Asked Madame Masque out of annoyance.
"He said that he would prefer it if you went there as soon as you can. Said something along the lines of needing to consult with you about what to do with Princess Twilight after he's done talking to her," Replied the stallion.
"Very well," Said Madame Masque begrudgingly.
She put Deadpool's mask back on her utility belt. She then left the room, and the door slammed behind her.
SLAM!
(So… we're in Count Nefaria's castle.)
"Yup," Deadpanned Deadpool.
(Madame Masque wants us as some kind of emotional support hostage.)
"Yup," Deadpanned Deadpool.
(And there are probably a shit ton of Maggia men between us and Twilight.)
"Yup. Of course the museum trip was foreshadowing for this moment in the story. I hate foreshadowing sometimes. Why can't some museums have no plot relevance?" Asked Deadpool exasperatedly.
(Do you have a plan?)
"Yes. I'm going to act like a coyote caught in a bear trap," Said Deadpool.
(Oh, Celestia…!)
Deadpool tried to move his right foreleg towards his mouth. Unable to move it past his knee, he shifted his body closer, stretching his left foreleg and shoulder. After much straining, he was able to grab the sleeve of his tuxedo with his teeth.
RIP!
Tearing the sleeve, he exposed his fetlock.
"You guys ready?" Asked Deadpool to himself.
(No…)
"Too bad," Said Deadpool.
Taking a breath to prepare himself, Deadpool took the first bite.
CHOMP!
Meanwhile…
Twilight was in a similar situation as her coltfriend. She was hanging from a dungeon wall with chains attached to her limbs. She also had a harness around her midsection, binding her wings. Most annoying of all, she had a ring on her horn that prevented her from using her magic.
CREAK!
The dungeon's door opened, and a stallion stepped inside. He was a tall pegasus stallion with golden yellow fur and wings, short and curly black mane and tail, blue eyes, and sporting a goatee. He wore a black bodysuit with a white neck, shoulder line and trunks, white gloves and boots with red trimming, a red belt with a yellow buckle with the letter N on it, and a high collared red cape with yellow lining. He held himself up with an air of confidence as he walked over to Twilight.
"Greetings, Your Majesty," Greeted the stallion with a bow, speaking with a thick Cavallan accent. "Welcome to my castle. I am Count Luchino Nefaria, but you can refer to me as Count Nefaria. I apologize for your current predicament, but I had to ensure that you wouldn't leave too soon. After all, opportunity is knocking."
"Where's my coltfriend?" Demanded Twilight sternly.
"Your partner is in a safe place, I assure you. After all, it's you that I'm more interested in," Answered Count Nefaria.
"What do you want with me?" Asked Twilight.
"That's what I am hoping to find out, Your Highness," Answered Count Nefaria. "As a princess of Equestria, you have greater influence and access to resources than most of the other politicians do. However, you're not the ruler of Equestria, nor are you the ruler of your own sovereignty such as Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. It also doesn't help that your 'power' pales in comparison to the ability to manipulate an entire celestial body."
"Yet another madpony who underestimates the magic of friendship," Thought Twilight. "Then maybe you should consider letting me go. Assuming you have him, I can take Deadpool with me and we'll pretend like none of this ever happened."
"Let's not be hasty, Your Highness. Tell me, even though you don't have a kingdom that is properly your own, you must have a lot of influence in Ponyville, don't you?" Asked Count Nefaria sinisterly.
"... Well, I wouldn't say I'm influential. I'm just liked by the community," Replied Twilight nervously.
"No need to be modest, Your Majesty. With your status as a princess and a hero to all of Equestria, ponies must have a lot of faith in you. So much so that if I were to have you keep the Nefaria family's operations under the table in Ponyville, ponies would believe you that nothing was going on, right?" Asked Count Nefaria.
With her home in the crosshairs of a criminal mastermind, Twilight gulped out of fear.
"Wh-What would you have me do?" Asked Twilight fearfully.
"Not that much. All I would really need from you is to allow me to carry out my business unimpeded. Use your trust with the community to draw away the suspicion of the authorities, the media, or anypony else who's sticking their muzzle in places they shouldn't be. If you agree to my terms, then you and your stallion are free to go," Said Count Nefaria.
"What if I were to refuse?" Asked Twilight.
"I will put it this way: my reach is long. All I'd have to do is get in contact with one of my hired guns, and your friends will be dead, no matter where they go. The same goes for your family, business associates, whoever I need to get rid of to get your full cooperation. Of course, I could also just kill your coltfriend. I have the means to do so," Threatened Count Nefaria.
Hearing that anypony she cared about could be at risk of being killed no matter where they were, Twilight started to sweat out of fear. Count Nefaria pulled out a pocket watch. He looked at the time, seeing that the watch read it was 11:19 p.m.
"I'll tell you what, Princess Twilight. I'll give you until morning to come to a decision. If you agree to help me, you and your coltfriend will be free to go until you are needed, but if you refuse, then ponies start going missing," Said Count Nefaria sinisterly.
On that note, he left the dungeon. As soon as the door shut behind him, Twilight tried to get free. She tested the structural integrity of the chains or the wall by pulling on each chain several times. Unfortunately, the chain links and stone bricks seem like they were all sturdy. Without her magic, escaping is more daunting of a task.
"Hopefully Wade's having better luck than I am. If we don't get out of here, I'd hate to think of what Nefaria would have planned for our home… or what he will do to him or anypony else I care about," Thought Twilight anxiously.
Meanwhile…
Deadpool had painfully bitten through most of his right foreleg. Blood stained his mouth and the collar of his shirt. Most of the flesh a couple inches above the fetlock was gone, revealing the cannon bone. His healing factor attempted to feel his wound, but he had kept tearing through his own flesh. The pain caused his breathing to become ragged. He grabbed his cannon bone with his mouth, and bit down as hard as he could.
He was applying as much force as he could, but the bone wasn't breaking. He knew that, as extremely painful as it was, it was the best way he could escape and help Twilight. Letting his motivation drive him, he bit down with so much force that his teeth started to feel like they would break.
CRACK!
"AAGHH!"
After a few grueling moments, Deadpool finally bit through his cannon bone. He then pulled his right foreleg, causing his hoof and part of his foreleg to tear off, freeing the rest of it. The severed portion of his foreleg fell onto the now blooded floor with a wet thud. Breathing through the pain, he wrapped the chain suspending his left foreleg around his severed limb, and pulled. Even though his hoof was gone, he was strong enough to break the cuff of the chain connected to his left forehoof from the stone wall.
"Whoa!"
WHAM!
With both his forelegs free, he fell forwards, nearly hitting his face on the ground. Awkwardly lifting himself up with his left foreleg, he saw his severed forehoof in front of him. Reaching out with his injured foreleg, his healing factor partially reattached his hoof. He grabbed onto both cuffs around his hind hooves and removed them from the wall. After all of that effort, he was finally free… mostly. All of his hooves except for his right forehoof were still bound by chains.
"CELESTIA! THAT FUCKING HURTS!" Shouted Deadpool in pain.
(Do you reckon that was how that mountain climber the movie 127 Hours is based off of felt?)
(At least he had a knife. Albeit a knife that was really dull.)
"Yet we still have these fucking chains on us," Said Deadpool.
(So, what's the plan?)
"Find Twilight, free her, then have her get these chains off us. From there we'll try to escape, crack some skulls if we have to, and hopefully salvage the rest of this night somehow. Any questions?" Asked Deadpool to himself.
(No, sir!)
(Can I use the bathroom first?)
Deadpool walked over to the door to the dungeon and knocked on it.
KNOCK! KNOCK!
"What the hell?"
Hearing a guard on the other side of the door, Deadpool stood to the left. The door opened up, and the guard stepped inside. The stallion was wearing a rather classy black tuxedo. He pointed a B76 pistol in front of him as he searched the inside of the room. It didn't take him long to discover that Deadpool wasn't hanging from the wall.
"He's-"
Before he could call out to anyone, Deadpool wrapped a chain around the guard's neck and dragged him away from the exit. In an effort to try to remove the chain suffocating him, the guard dropped his gun. This ended up being futile as Deadpool had the chain around him tightly. After nearly a minute, the guard passed out from a lack of oxygen, and just in time. Deadpool could hear the sound of galloping ponies coming towards him. Letting go of the guard, he swiftly picked up the pistol off the ground.
A group of 7 well dressed guards entered the room, all of them with guns drawn. Deadpool could feel the weight of the chains restricting his movements. Knowing that the guards could take advantage of his vulnerability, he had to not take any chances.
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Before any of the guards could react, Deadpool shot all 7 of them in the head, killing them all instantaneously.
"Celestia, damn it! Every time I make progress, I end up killing somepony! At least this should count as justifiable cause," Said Deadpool, gesturing at the room and the chains.
He walked past all of the dead guards, making his way to the entrance. He poked his head out from the doorway, looking for any more guards and surveying his surroundings. He noticed that the dungeon was connected to a hallway, with multiple doors lining up along each side. He then spotted a guard at the end of the hall, guarding a door. Noticing him as well, the guard drew a firearm.
"Sto-"
BANG!
Deadpool shot the guard in the head, causing him to hit the back of his head against the door. His body slid down onto the floor as his life ended.
"Maybe…"
Deadpool ran over to where the guard was. He pressed his right ear against the door, and knocked.
KNOCK! KNOCK!
"Twilight, are you in here?" Asked Deadpool.
"Wade?! I'm here!" Replied Twilight on the other side of the door.
Relieved to hear Twilight's voice, Deadpool grabbed the guard's corpse and dragged it away. He then frisked the guard's clothes, and found a singular key. He also grabbed the guard's pistol, giving himself an additional weapon. Using the key to unlock the door, he ran inside. He saw Twilight hanging from the wall, and rushed over to her.
"Twilight! Are you alright?" Asked Deadpool concerningly.
"I'm okay. I'm relieved that you were here. How did you get out?" Asked Twilight. She quickly noticed the blood on Deadpool's face and right foreleg as well as the chains around him. "And what happened to you?!"
"I'd rather not talk about it. Let's focus on getting you free," Said Deadpool, swiftly changing the subject.
Deadpool got up on his hind legs, and reached towards Twilight's horn. He pushed against the inhibitor ring, and slid it off of her horn, causing it to fall onto the floor.
POOF!
Now able to use her magic, Twilight charged up her magic, and teleported out of her restraints.
"Thank you," Said Twilight gratefully.
"You're welcome. Now, could you be my lovely assistant and help remove these chains?" Asked Deadpool, pointing at his chains.
Nodding her head in response, Twilight lit up her horn. Her magenta magic enveloped the cuffs of the chains. They snapped in half, causing the chains to fall to the floor. Deadpool moved his joints around, glad to finally be free.
"Thank you," Said Deadpool. "That feels soooo much better! I feel a whole 150 pounds li-"
Before Deadpool could finish his sentence, he was cut off by Twilight embracing him in a hug. He reciprocated the hug. Both ponies embraced each other for a few seconds before letting go.
"Let's get out of here. Maybe kick a few butts along the way," Said Deadpool.
Twilight nodded her head. Just as they were about to leave, Deadpool stopped.
"Wait, just so you know, I had to kill some guards due to my predicament. There's a dead guard over by the door, so keep that in mind," Said Deadpool.
"Thank you," Said Twilight in understanding.
On that note, both ponies left the room. As soon as they stepped out the door, Twilight noticed the dead guard. Looking away from the body, she followed Deadpool down the hallway. It wasn't long until they came across a stone spiral staircase. Climbing up the stairs, they stopped in front of a door. Twilight cautiously opened the door, and surveyed her surroundings.
On the other side was yet another hallway, but it was much less daunting than the dungeon hall. The walls were painted green with gold trimming, and the floor was made up of dark hardwood. Portraits hung from the walls, each depicting either a member of the Nefaria family, beautiful landscapes, or historical events (events that the Nefarias were likely involved in). Twilight spotted a couple stallions walking down the hall away from her. Seeing an opportunity to take them out, she fired a couple of magical bolts that crackled like electricity.
THUD! THUD!
Both ponies were instantly paralyzed, falling forwards onto the floor. She used her magic to drag both of them into the stairwell, and propped them up along the wall. Checking one more time to make sure the coast is clear, she waved for Deadpool to follow her. They both stealthily walked down the hall, stopping at the entryway to another hallway.
Looking around the corner, they saw another stallion coming towards them. Based on the fact that he was intensively looking around the hall, he might have been investigating the sound made by the two stallions. They waited for him to make the corner, then Deadpool grabbed him. Dragging him back to the wall, Deadpool covered his mouth with one foreleg and strangled him with the other. After some intense struggling, the stallion exhausted himself to the point of passing out. Twilight used her magic to levitate him to the staircase. Once he was placed with the other guards, she and Deadpool went down the hallway he came from.
"Do you have an idea of how to get out of here?" Asked Deadpool quietly.
"No," Answered Twilight just as quietly. "I was hoping we could make somepony give us directions, but I don't want to risk getting caught. I hope this castle isn't big. I'd hate for us to get lost trying to navigate these hallways."
"Considering the fact that Count Nefaria is wealthy with an ego to boot, there's a good chance this place is huge. Hopefully, we'll find one of those big map things you would find in super malls," Remarked Deadpool.
There were three pairs of doors along the hallway, one of which was open. Both ponies quietly walked past the first two doors, then peered inside the open room. Four of Madame Masque's thugs were sitting in what appeared to be a parlor. Two of them were engaged in idle chatter while the others were reading magazines. Seeing an opportunity to get information out of one of them, Twilight fired a magic bolt into the room that produced a bright white light.
"What the fuck?!"
"Quick, Deadpool! Grab one of them!" Ordered Twilight.
Both ponies ran inside, becoming fully immersed by the light. Twilight fired a couple bolts of magic, their magenta glow just barely appearing within the white light. After a few seconds, the light finally faded away. Three of Madame Masque's henchponies were knocked out on the floor, while the remaining one was caught within Deadpool's grasp. Twilight shut the door to hopefully prevent anypony from hearing them.
"Tell us how to get out of the castle," Demanded Twilight.
"What makes you think I know how to get out of here?" Asked the henchpony.
"Assuming that this is your first time here, it doesn't negate the fact that you would have entered here through an entrance of some sort. Since you aren't a pegasus, you wouldn't have been able to enter through a window," Deduced Twilight.
"That… is a reasonable deduction," Said the henchpony sheepishly.
WHAM!
Deadpool slammed the henchpony's face against a coffee table.
"Deadpool, don't you think you jumped the gun a little?" Asked Twilight.
"Sorry," Replied Deadpool.
"As you can see, I don't have much control over my friend's impulses. So I'll ask again, how do we get out of here?" Asked Twilight.
"Alright! Head back out to the hall and go left. Go past two rooms, then take a right. From there, enter the first or second door on the left. They both lead to the throne room. It's a straight shot to the exit from there," Instructed the henchpony.
"Anything else we should know?" Asked Twilight.
"Unless Count Nefaria or Madame Masque are in the throne room, the only thing you would need to look out for are the guards stationed along the castle's walls, and the pegasi guards flying overhead," Answered the henchpony.
"Thank you," Said Twilight.
BAM!
Now that they had the answers they needed, Deadpool knocked the henchpony out with one punch. He and Twilight made their way back to the hallway. Following the henchpony's instructions to the letter, they ended up at one of the throne room doors. Opening the door, they carefully stepped inside. The throne room had the same coloration and flooring as the rest of the castle, the roof was held up by stone columns, and a red carpet led to a golden throne towards the back of the room. A large yellow crest depicting a snake being pulled on both ends by two cockatrices hung on the wall behind the throne. Seeing a hallway on the other side, they quietly trekked across the room, hoping to not draw the attention of any nearby henchponies.
"Leaving so soon?"
Not getting very far before they were spotted, Twilight and Deadpool awkwardly stopped in their tracks. The former recognized the voice of the stallion speaking to them. Turning around, she saw Count Nefaria sitting on the throne.
"I'm afraid your extended stay at my castle isn't finished yet," Remarked Count Nefaria.
"As much as I appreciate your hospitality, I'm afraid I have to cut my visit short," Remarked Twilight in return.
"How unfortunate. I'm afraid that you don't have much of a say on the matter. I have quotas to meet, and I can't do so without you," Said Count Nefaria.
CLOP! CLOP!
Clapping his hooves together, Count Nefaria summoned a group of henchponies.
"Gentlecolts, please escort Princess Twilight back to her living quarters, and dispose of the unsightly stallion," Ordered Count Nefaria.
"Of course, boss," Replied one of Nefaria's men.
"Not so fast!"
A familiar feminine voice could be heard from the door to the right of the throne. Suddenly, the door flung open, revealing the golden masked crime boss on the other side..
"Madame Masque, what is the meaning of this?" Asked Count Nefaria annoyedly.
"I am planning on keeping the stallion for myself," Said Madame Masque.
"I made my decision, Masque. You should respect it," Said Count Nefaria with authority.
"I believe you're forgetting that we are equals in our operation. Therefore, I have the right to challenge your orders. Besides, once I have taken him back to my base of operations, he can't affect your business," Said Madame Masque.
"Wade, what is she talking about?" Asked Twilight.
"I'll explain it to you if we can get ourselves out of this situation," Replied Deadpool.
"In fact, I'll help you apprehend the Princess," Said Madame Masque to Count Nefaria.
CLOP!
With a stomp of her hoof, Madame Masque summoned a small group of her men.
"If I were you two, I would consider surrendering right now," Advised Madame Masque.
"Oh yeah? Well, let's see what you think of this!" Said Deadpool.
CLOP!
Deadpool stomped his hoof on the ground. He looked around the room, apparently looking for something. Confused, Deadpool stomped his hoof on the ground a couple more times.
CLOP! CLOP!
Looking around again, he saw nothing new.
"Uh… Twilight, stomp your hoof," Ordered Deadpool.
"What?" Asked Twilight in confusion.
"Just do it," Replied Deadpool.
CLOP!
Perplexed, Twilight did as she was asked. Deadpool looked around the room one more time, seeing nothing yet again.
"Oh, man! Why don't we have backup?! You're a princess, I'm a superhero; we should have backup!" Said Deadpool irritatedly.
"Get them," Ordered Madame Masque.
All of the henchponies rushed Deadpool and Twilight. The latter summoned a forcefield around them. Some of the men pulled out various firearms, and fired at the forcefield. It was holding up against a barrage of bullets, but for how long is uncertain.
"Want to cut our losses and teleport out of here?" Asked Deadpool.
"If I knew where we were, I would be comfortable with doing that. Also, I would like to personally give these ponies a piece of my mind for threatening us, the people back at the casino, and the ponies I care about. As well as for interrupting our anniversary," Admitted Twilight.
"Fine by me. Do you have a plan?" Asked Deadpool.
"I'll deal with the little fish. You can go and fight Madame Masque," Replied Twilight.
"Boss fight against crazy masked bitch? Fun," Said Deadpool sarcastically.
"Let me know when you're ready to go," Said Twilight.
"Ready as I'll ever be," Replied Deadpool.
Twilight shattered her force field, creating a shock wave that caused several men to get launched across the room. This gave Deadpool an opening to get to Madame Masque. He galloped towards her, then got up onto his hind legs and attempted to land the first blow with a front kick. Madame Masque blocked it, then kicked his other hind leg, causing him to fall onto his back. She attempted to shoot him, but he rolled out of the way.
One of Count Nefaria's men tried to get their gun off the floor, but Twilight formed a magic tendril around their hind leg, then threw them into a different henchpony. A couple men tried to shoot her from behind, but she quickly turned around and summoned a shield to deflect the shot. She then fired back her own magical bolts, launching them backwards and putting them out of commission.
A few of Madame Masque's men tried to shoot her as well, but she teleported their weapons out of their hooves and made them reappear above them, knocking out any who weren't able to protect their heads. Twilight summoned a shield in front of her, then flew through a group of henchponies, ramming into any that got in her way. One unfortunate guard was picked up off the ground. She somersaulted in the air, then slammed him onto the floor, knocking him out.
A pegasus henchpony tried to divebomb her, but she teleported out of the way. Reappearing behind them, she casted a freezing spell onto them, encasing them in a block of ice. The block of ice rammed into a couple other henchponies.
Meanwhile, Deadpool was trying to shoot Madame Masque's legs. She was surprisingly quick, dodging each shot with grace. She cartwheeled towards him, then kicked a pistol out of his right hoof. She followed up with a flurry of punches. Deadpool blocked each strike, and retaliated by kneeing her in the abdomen. He then punched the side of her face, and kicked her in the center of her barrel, causing her to stumble back. He prepared to get a shot off her, but she recovered quickly. She grabbed his left foreleg, and moved it so the barrel of the pistol faced towards the floor.
BANG!
The gun firing safely into the floor, she pinned his foreleg under hers, then broke it with a thrust of her hock. Once he dropped his weapon, she yanked him closer, and elbowed him in the face. She then lifted him over her shoulder, and slammed him onto the floor. Just as she was about to stomp on him, he kicked out the hind leg she was standing on. She rolled forward, then went to punch him in the face. Deadpool rolled to the side, causing her to punch the floor. Deadpool grabbed one of the pistols off the floor, and fired a couple shots. Madame Masque hastily hid behind the entrance she entered the throne room in for cover. She pulled out her own Glisenti pistol, and engaged him in a shootout.
While they were engaged in their shootout, Twilight was finishing off the rest of the henchponies. She summoned a tendril around the hind leg of two stallions, causing them to trip over each other. She then used her magic to slam their faces into the floor, knocking them out. A stallion sneaked up from behind, and wrapped his forelegs around her in an attempt to restrain her. Twilight's alicorn strength enabled her to easily break free from his grasp. She then put all of her weight onto her forelegs, and delivered a powerful buck to the face, knocking him out.
Looking around, she saw that all of Count Nefaria and Madame Masque's men were all unconscious. Speaking of, Count Nefaria looked at all of the unconscious underlings all around him with an inscrutable look on his face.
"I suppose it was wrong of me to believe that any of my underlings could have the slightest chance of subduing an alicorn. In that case, if I want the job done right, then I should do it myself," Said Count Nefaria while standing up from his throne.
"Count Nefaria, I urge you to surrender. You saw what I did to your men, I'd hate to hurt you as well," Pleaded Twilight.
"Oh, you don't have to worry about that, Your Highness…"
Suddenly, Count Nefaria's eyes glowed orange. Lifting up his left fore hoof, it became enveloped in a light shade of orange light. Surprised by what she was seeing, Twilight watched as Nefaria aimed his hoof towards her.
POOF!
Nefaria fired a powerful laser beam from his hoof, Twilight teleported out of the way by the skin of her teeth. The laser punched a hole through the front entrance to the castle on the other end of the hallway, destroying the front doors.
"... After all, you couldn't hurt me no matter how hard you try!" Said Count Nefaria with a sinister smile.
Faster than the equine eye can track, Count Nefaria flew across the throne room and tackled Twilight into a wall. She teleported out of the way of an oncoming punch to her face. Count Nefaria's punch left a dent in the wall. Reappearing behind him, Twilight fired a beam of magic at him. The beam hit him in the back, but it didn't even so much as faze him.
Nefaria turned around, and fired hot orange beams from his eyes. Twilight flew out of the way, and used her magic to bind Nefaria's limbs to the floor. With only a little effort, Nefaria managed to break free. He fired multiple ionic energy blasts from his hooves. Twilight dodged each beam, then punched him in the face. She then delivered a few more punches, but they weren't doing anything to him. He delivered a few punches of his own, knocking her into his throne.
POOF!
Sensing an oncoming attack, Twilight teleported. Just as she disappeared, Nefaira flew in and delivered a powerful kick. The kick reduced the throne to rubble. Reappearing above him, Twilight cast a more powerful beam of magic. Even this attack wasn't enough to harm Nefaria. He grabbed a piece of his throne, and threw it at her. She dodged the oncoming piece of debris, but she was immediately tackled through the ceiling.
Meanwhile, Deadpool was still caught up in his own fight with Madame Masque. Debris from the ceiling forced him to take evasive action. Dodging the falling debris, he fired a few shots from his pistol, all of which missed his opponent. The clip of his gun now empty, he attempted to grab another gun off the floor. Taking advantage of his vulnerability, Madame Masque tossed a gas grenade towards him. Stopping in his tracks, Deadpool swiftly ran the other way.
FWOOSH!
BANG!
While he managed to avoid getting a face full of tear gas, Deadpool was shot in the chest. With her opponent falling onto his back, she came out from behind the doorway she was using as cover, and walked towards him with her gun aimed at his head. She stepped onto his chest, then lowered herself down until her face nearly touched his.
"You have given me a lot of trouble tonight. However, I will show mercy and give you the chance to surrender. If you do, I won't have to use more extreme measures of rendering you unconscious," Said Madame Masque while waving her weapon to get her point across.
"Tempting offer, but here's my response."
WHAM!
Deadpool headbutted Madame Masque directly in the face. However, her metal mask absorbed the blow, and caused excruciating pain to Deadpool.
"OW! FUCK!" Cried Deadpool in agony.
(That was a brilliant idea.)
"Stupid mask!" Said Deadpool irritatedly.
Looking at Madame Masque's mask, Deadpool thought back to everything she had told him while he was imprisoned. It was obvious to him that Madame Masque was paranoid about her own appearance. That was when an idea popped into his head.
"The mask…" Muttered Deadpool to himself.
Getting back up, Madame Masque went to take her shot.
BANG!
Deadpool used his arm to block the bullet. He then splattered his blood all over Madame Masque's mask.
"UGH!" Cried Madame Masque in disgust.
Distracted by her bloodied face wear, Deadpool grabbed onto her hind leg and pulled, causing her to fall onto the ground. Deadpool grabbed onto her mask.
KICK!
Madame Masque kicked Deadpool off her. Once she got off the floor, she looked at her adversary. She quickly noticed that within Deadpool's grasp was her precious mask. She self consciously rubbed her hoof across her face, horrified that her face was now visible to the world. Her face lacked any fur, revealing flesh that was riddled with scars caused by extreme burns. Her right nostril looked like it had caved in on itself, and the skin around her eyes were stretched as if it were worn leather. Her body shook as her horror was replaced with unbridled rage.
"AAARRRGGHH!"
(Oh Celestia she's pissed!)
With reckless abandon, Madame Masque ran towards Deadpool, hellbent on getting her mask back. With a new sense of fear, Deadpool ran for his life. Deadpool ran down the hall on the opposite side of the throne room. Seeing the exit on the other side, he picked up the pace. Running through a pair of double doors, Deadpool found himself out on the castle grounds, or more appropriately, castle clouds. With the exception of a network of paths and a giant wall that encompassed the entire castle, the entire area was made up of clouds. Before Madame Masque could hope to catch up to him, Deadpool tossed her mask. She watched as it fell through the clouds down to the earth below.
"NO!" Cried Madame Masque in anguish.
Now angered to levels unimaginable, she tackled Deadpool's side. She gave him a taste of his own medicine by tossing him over the side of the walkway. Deadpool managed to grab onto the walkway before he could fall through the clouds, but now he found himself at her mercy. Madame Masque loomed over him, breathing raggedly as her rage continued to course through her body.
"I… have made a grave error in judgment! You are not worth keeping around! You have no idea what you have brought upon yourself! I hope for your sake that the fall won't be too painful," Said Madame Masque manically.
Using her magic, she attempted to pry his front hooves off of the walkway. Deadpool tightened his grip as much as he could, but he can feel his hooves gradually get pulled off of the only thing that kept him from meeting the same fate as his enemy's mask.
As this was occurring, Twilight Sparkle and Count Nefaria were continuing their fight from the skies above. As she tried to avoid her opponent's powerful blows and energy blasts, she surveyed her surroundings. She could make out the bright lights of Las Pegasus in the distance, the neon colors cutting through the night sky. As she dodged an oncoming laser blast, she spotted her coltfriend and Madame Masque. Noticing the peril the former was in, she gasped out of fear. Needing to act quickly, she lit the tip of her horn with a bright light, and directed it at Count Nefaria as he was going to fly into her.
"Gah!" Cried Count Nefaria in pain.
With him blinded by the bright light, Twilight took the opportunity to fly towards the two ponies down below. Madame Masque had successfully caused one of Deadpool's hooves to slip, leaving him dangling with only one hoof on the walkway. As she was prying back his other hoof, Twilight fired a beam of magic at her.
"Ugh!" Cried Madame Masque in pain.
She was launched away from Deadpool, rolling across the walkway. When her body stopped rolling, she attempted to get up. It didn't take very long for her to slump back onto the ground and lose consciousness. Just as Deadpool lost his grip, Twilight swooped in and caught him. The former sighed in relief as he was brought back onto the path.
"Thank you," Said Deadpool.
"You're welcome," Replied Twilight.
SMASH!
Suddenly, she was slammed through the walkway by Count Nefaria. She teleported out of his grasp, then fired a beam of magic at him. He crossed his forelegs to absorb the blow, then fired both a laser beam and an ionic blast back at her. His opponent dodging both of his attacks, he tried crossing both of them together. This struck Twilight with devastating force.
POOF!
Needing to put distance between herself and Nefaria, she teleported several stories up. Once she was at a safe distance, she began to charge up her magic.
"Wade! Run inside, now!" Urged Twilight.
Seeing her prepare to unleash a powerful attack, Deadpool leapt over the hole in the path. Grabbing an unconscious Madame Masque, he rushed back into the castle. Twilight created a ball of magic that was nearly three times her size. Just as Count Nefaria started to fly towards her, she fired her magic. The ball of magic converted into a devastating energy blast.
VROOM!
Twilight's magical energy blast lit up the area like it was daytime, and the path that led from the castle's front entrance to the front wall was completely destroyed. When the light faded away, Twilight barely had time to register Count Nefaria flying right towards her.
BAM!
Count Nefaria landed an uppercut to Twilight's jaw, launching her even higher into the air. He then flew just above her and caught her. He lifted her over his head, then threw her towards the castle.
CRASH!
She was thrown through the roof of the castle and a few rooms before landing in the throne room. The floor cracked underneath her from the impact. Deadpool spotted her from the other side of the room.
"TWILIGHT!" Cried Deadpool.
Deadpool rushed over to Twilight. He gently helped her to her hooves.
"Hey, you alright? You know, other than the obvious?" Asked Deadpool.
(Wow, you picked up on something that would be obvious to others?)
"Not the time!" Said Deadpool in a hushed, irritated tone.
"I'll be okay, but I don't think I can stop him. He's too powerful for my magic alone, and I don't have our friends and the Elements of Harmony here to help us," Said Twilight.
"Princess Twilight Sparkle!"
Count Nefaria gently flew down through the hole left in the ceiling. Twilight's attack had merely tarnished his outfit.
"Now that you have seen my power for yourself, Princess, I'll only give you one last chance. Surrender now, or you will be subdued painfully," Threatened Count Nefaria.
"Twilight, as much as I love a good scrape, I think it would be within our best interest to get the fuck out of here," Advised Deadpool. "Do you by chance know where we are now?"
" I do," Replied Twilight. "I would agree to a tactful retreat, but he will look for me and try to draw me out. I'd hate to think of what his powers could do on an ordinary pony. Based on the actions of his partner earlier this evening, I'm willing to bet he would resort to harming innocent civilians."
His marefriend bringing up a valid point, Deadpool tried to think of a different way out of their current situation. In particular, he was trying to think of how other heroes could go about stopping someone as strong as Count Nefaria. That was when an idea popped into his head.
"Twilight, could you teleport all three of us to Manehattan?" Asked Deadpool.
"I can. Anywhere specific?" Asked Twilight in response.
"Anywhere near a police precinct," Answered Deadpool.
"The police? Wade, normally that would be a good thing to do, but I don't think they would have the means to stop somepony like him. Not to mention lots of ponies could get caught up in the crossfire" Said Twilight.
"Well, as of recently, the police do have something that could help us. As long as we can keep Nefaria on you or the two of us, we shouldn't have to worry about him hurting anypony else. Trust me on this," Said Deadpool.
Twilight thought about what Deadpool said hesitantly, but she decided to go with whatever plan he concocted. Losing his patience, Nefaria flew towards them. Just as he was about to fly into them, Twilight teleported all three of them.
POOF!
They ended up in the streets of Manehattan. As Nefaria tackled Twilight into a nearby building, ponies who were minding their own business ran for their lives. Twilight attempted to cast a spell, but Nefaria swiftly grabbed her horn, squeezing it so tightly that the pain caused her magic to crackle from the tip of her horn. Neafaria prepared to deliver a punch that likely would have done the Princess in.
SHATTER!
Suddenly, a glass bottle was thrown into the back of his neck. This did not hurt him in the slightest, but it did catch his attention. Looking back, he saw Deadpool a few meters away holding a hoofful of trash.
"You DARE toss filth at me?!" Said Count Nefaria angrily.
CLING!
In response to his question, Deadpool tossed an empty beer can at his face.
"Does that answer your question?" Asked Deadpool.
"Perhaps an example needs to be made," Said Nefaria ominously.
Count Nefaria released Twilight from his grasp, and flew over to Deadpool so fast that it looked like he teleported. He hovered less than a foot away from the hero. Knowing the danger he was now in, Deadpool's ears drooped out of terror. He was about to toss a banana peel at him, but he ended up dropping all of his ammunition, knowing that he was screwed either way.
WHAM!
Count Nefaria punched Deadpool into the air. The latter traveled above the street as fast as a speeding pegasus. Count Nefaria flew ahead of his trajectory, and grabbed him by the face, breaking his muzzle. He then slammed him into the road, creating a trench through the asphalt. Bracing himself onto his hind legs, Nefaria repeatedly punched Deadpool.
POW! POW! POW!
Nefaria battered Deadpool's body with each blow. After nearly half a minute of this brutal beating, he ceased his punches. Most of Deadpool's body was nearly liquid-like, holes were made from where Nefaria's hooves punched through him, and blood pooled around him. Count Nefaria's hooves glowed orange, preparing to deliver a laser blast. His body broken and practically merging with the road, Deadpool could only look up at him in complete agony.
"Even you shouldn't be able to recover from my laser beams. Any last words before your atoms are split apart?" Asked Count Nefaria grimly.
"... Freeze…" Muttered Deadpool weakly.
"MPD! Get on the ground and put your hooves up, now!"
Hearing an authoritative voice and guns being armed behind him, Nefaria turned around. He saw a squad of police officers. They were wearing the typical blue uniform worn by some law enforcement authorities and body armor that had the word "POLICE" engraved with bold letters. However, almost all of them wore blue brimmed hats that had a white phoenix on the front, and one stallion wore a helmet that had his jaw visible.
Seeing the officers, Count Nefaria raised his hoof towards them, deciding to kill them instead. Before he could carry out his attack, his hoof was enveloped by a familiar magenta magic. Over by the brick building he left her at, Twilight was concentrating on containing his laser beam. Seeing her, Nefaria attempted to fire his laser beam at her. After a few strenuous seconds, Twilight was able to cause his attack to fade out.
"What?!" Cried Nefaria in shock.
He attempted to fly over to Twilight, but his limbs and wings were wrapped up in Twilight's magic. He pulled himself out of the grasp of a couple magical tendrils, but Twilight summoned more around him. Every time he removed one of his restraints, she summoned more and more tendrils. Eventually, his entire body except for his head was enveloped in her magic. As he struggled to break free, a unicorn officer used their magic to place a metal collar around Nefaria's neck. With the collar secure around his neck, Nefaria felt himself becoming weaker. He tried to break free from his magical restraints, but without his super strength, he had no hope of escaping. Instead, he fell onto the ground, squirming as if he were trapped in a sleeping bag.
POOF!
Now that he was restrained, Twilight teleported over to Count Nefaria. He looked up at her in anger, which she returned. Twilight raised her foreleg, causing Nefaria to flinch.
POW!
With one swift punch, Twilight knocked Count Nefaria out cold.
"That was for hurting my coltfriend, and interrupting our anniversary, jerk," Said Twilight irritatedly.
Seeing that Nefaria had been taken care of, one of the officers grabbed a walkie talkie.
"This is Lieutenant Stone! Captain Nefaria has been neutralized! I repeat: Nefaria has been neutralized!" Said the office.
The other officers walked over to Count Nefaria as more of their colleagues arrived on the scene.
A few minutes later…
The area where Twilight, Deadpool, and Count Nefaria fought was swiftly contained by the police. Barriers with officers watching over them kept any curious civilians from entering the crime scene. Restrained with a straitjacket, Count Nefaria was being escorted by two police officers with the aid of a dolly. He was lifted into the back of a prisoner chariot. Once the doors were shut, one of the officers signaled to a small group of armored officers to pull the chariot. Doing as they were instructed, the officers went on their way to bring Nefaria into custody.
Deadpool and Twilight watched off to the side. They were both propping each other up, their bodies feeling the effects of the severe beating they had taken. This was especially true for Deadpool. Lt. Stone walked over to the two heroes. He was an earth pony stallion with brown fur and a black goatee. He wore a pair of sunglasses over his eyes.
"Are you feeling alright, Princess? EMTs should be here in a few minutes if you need any assistance," Offered Lt. Stone, speaking with an authoritative tone.
(Hey! What about us?)
(He probably knows who we are; for better or for worse.)
"I'll be alright," Assured Twilight. "I've been in my fair share of battles. Thank you anyway, officer…?"
"Stone. Letuinent Marcus Stone. I serve as the leader of MPD's Code: Blue division. It's an honor to meet you, Princess Twilight," Said Lt. Stone with a bow.
"And me?" Asked Deadpool.
"With all due respect, you have a bit of a reputation within the MPD, and it ain't entirely great," Replied Lt. Stone.
"Oh… Understandable, I guess," Muttered Deadpool glumly.
(Guess that confirms my answer.)
"If you two don't need any medical care, I was hoping you would be willing to provide some information on everything that transpired tonight?" Said Lt. Stone.
"Of course, officer," Replied Twilight.
"Excellent. Let's start off with where were you two and Count Nefaria prior to the fight? Eyewitness reports claim you all teleported out of nowhere," Said Lt. Stone.
"We were at Count Nefaria's mansion in Las Pegasus. He and his partner, Madame Masque, had kept Wade and I hostage. I teleported the three of us here at the behest of my coltfriend. He said Manehattan's police were now capable of helping us stop someone like Nefaria," Explained Twilight.
"He must have heard about Code: Blue. We were formed under the current mayorship to combat the super criminal crisis the city's been in for the past several years. Does that seem about right?" Asked Lt. Stone to Deadpool.
"Yeah, I remembered reading about you guys while I was reading the paper during my morning dump. I figured Code: Blue would have power dampening collars on hoof for ponies such as mafia Superpony," Explained Deadpool.
"Did not need to know that first bit, but thank you for bringing him to our attention. I'd hate to think about what Nefaria could have done if you all continued your brawl in Pegasus' streets," Said Lt. Stone.
"Next time I meet up with them, I could talk with Princesses Celestia and Luna about potentially having Code: Blue units in other major settlements," Said Twilight.
"That would be great. Manehattan's most wanted often lie low in other cities such as Pegasus since local law enforcement don't have the means to stop them, nor have as many vigilantes operating in those areas. Now, do you know why you two were kidnapped in the first place?" Asked Lt. Stone.
"I was taken because both Count Nefaria and Madame Masque knew that there was value in having somepony of my status hostage. Nefaira specifically wanted to set up operations in Ponyville, and wanted me to keep his activities hidden," Answered Twlight.
"And Madame Masque wanted me just so she could feel better about her own looks," Answered Deadpool.
"Seriously…?" Asked Twilight.
"Yeah, it sounds completely crazy," Replied Deadpool.
"Did they attempt to force you to comply in any way?" Asked Lt. Stone.
"Count Nefaria threatened that he would have everyone I cared about killed if I didn't do what he wanted," Answered Twilight.
"I would like to believe that Madame Masque was too entranced to make any threats against me," Answered Deadpool.
"I'm sorry for everything that they put you two through. Do you know where Count Nefaria's place of residence is, so an investigation can be carried out over there?" Asked Lt. Stone.
"I don't know the address, but I know that it was roughly 2 miles north of Las Pegasus," Replied Twilight.
"I'm sure LPPD can work off of that. Speaking of, is there anything that they should know about?" Asked Lt. Stone.
"You'll hopefully find Madame Masque and a bunch of henchponies that had their flanks hoofed to them thanks mostly to Twilight," Replied Deadpool.
"Alright. Is there anything else that you can think of?" Asked Lt. Stone.
"Yes, they probably are already aware of it, but make sure that the police in Las Pegasus go to the Grand Las Pegasus casino. Madame Masque took us from there, and based on what I overheard, somepony was probably murdered," Explained Twilight sadly.
"I'll verify that for you. That should cover everything for now. If we need to consult you about tonight's events, court attendance, or anything else, we'll get in contact with you," Said Lt. Stone.
"Thank you, officer. Have a good rest of your evening, and try to be safe," Said Twilight.
"Thank you, Princess. I'll try, but if I wanted to ensure my safety, I wouldn't have stuck around here, or gotten into law enforcement in the first place," Said Lt. Stone.
On that note, Lt. Stone returned to his colleagues.
One hour later…
Deadpool and Twilight had returned to their hotel room in Las Pegasus. The former was sprawled out on the bed. He had abandoned the clothes he wore this evening, leaving them in an untidy pile at the foot of the bed. His face was blood free thanks to an intensive shower.
(Imagine that shot of the tub drain in Psycho.)
Twilight stepped out of the bathroom, and walked over to the right side of the bed.
"How are you feeling?" Asked Twilight.
"I'm doing a lot better, but that's to be expected," Answered Deadpool. "I should be asking you that question."
"I'm feeling better as well. I know that you can recover from most things, but I like to ask since injuries are not the only thing that can be inflicted on you. After all, you were kidnapped," Said Twilight.
"Different variants of me have been kidnapped for more nefarious purposes. I'll be alright. If anything, I feel bad that Madame Masque's fear of being judged by her scars is so bad that she felt like she had to kidnap me instead of talking to a therapist or finding somepony who wouldn't judge her for her looks. I know that Tony Stark doesn't. What about you?" Asked Deadpool.
"I'll be alright as well. Nefaria isn't the first pony to threaten Ponyville. Although, what does disturb me was the fact he was willing to hurt the ponies I care about just for the sake of getting me to comply," Admitted Twilight.
"Well, regardless of how powerful he is, you'll make sure that he won't be able to act on his threats; we both will," Assured Deadpool. "I'm sorry how everything panned out tonight. I wanted to give you not only the best anniversary, but also the best Las Pegasus experience. I guess, funnily enough, I made a bad gamble believing that things would go smoothly for us."
"Wade, you don't have to apologize. I still enjoyed what we were able to do, and I would be lying if I said I didn't find some enjoyment from apprehending Nefaria and Madame Masque," Said Twilight Sparkle.
"Really?" Asked Deadpool.
"Mm-hmm!" Replied Twilight.
"Well, I'm glad that you were able to do that. Now that all of the excitement is over, you and I should get some sleep," Said Deadpool.
He shuffled over to the left side of the bed, giving Twilight a place she could lay down on. At that moment, something came to Twilight. Whatever it was she was thinking of, it made her blush. She hopped onto the bed, sitting at the foot of the bed.
"Hey, Wade?" Said Twilight.
"Yeah?" Replied Deadpool.
"I just realized after all of the excitement from this evening, I never got a chance to give you your anniversary gift. I know it's late, but would it be alright if I give it to you?" Asked Twilight.
"Of course. I like presents, especially from you," Said Deadpool.
"Okay!" Blurted Twilight.
Twilight remained fixed to where she was sitting, smiling in a sheepish manner. Both ponies sat in awkward silence.
"Are you going to get it, or is it one of those gifts I'm supposed to discover by me retrieving it?" Asked Deadpool confusedly.
"I-It's not a… traditional gift," Said Twilight sheepishly.
(Is she trying to get us to guess what it is? I hate the guessing game!)
(I don't know, but she's behaving rather oddly all of a sudden.)
Deadpool tried to figure out what Twilight was trying to convey. He felt her tail wrap around his left hind leg. He couldn't help but follow her tail up to her flank.
GASP!
Suddenly, a thought came to his head. A rather lewd thought that even he was surprised by.
"No…!" Said Deadpool in breathless disbelief.
"Mm-hmm!" Said Twilight while nodding her head.
"... This isn't a joke, right? If this is a joke, it is rather cruel of you," Said Deadpool.
"No, I'm not joking, Wade. I want to have sex with you," Said Twilight, her blush turning an even darker shade of red.
(... All of the different sex and genital jokes and innuendos were FORESHADOWING?!)
([Joyful sobs] YES! I have been dreaming of this moment!)
Deadpool grinned from ear to ear. A moment he had waited a long time for had finally come. As he looked at Twilight, he picked up on her anxious ticks. Seeing that she was obviously nervous about the ordeal, he now seemed hesitant. Twilight was quick to pick up on this.
"Wade, are you okay?" Asked Twilight concerningly.
"Yeah, I am. I'm fuckin ecstatic!" Said Deadpool. "However…"
"However?" Questioned Twilight.
"However, are you sure you want to have sex with me?" Asked Deadpool.
"Of course I do," Answered Twilight sincerely. "Why would you think that I wouldn't?"
"Well, you know, I am not exactly… What's the word? Subtle? Yeah, subtle about my desires. Whether it be suggesting that we go somewhere private where you and I could get busy or I touch your butt, I've made my sexual attraction towards you evident. But just because I want to have sex with you, that shouldn't mean you have to as well. I know that expectations from either pony can lead to some horrible shit. I'm by no means a perfect pony, but at least I can look at myself in the mirror every morning for at least one extra second knowing that I didn't take advantage of somepony's body. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I ever made you do anything with me in the bedroom that you weren't ready or willing to do. So, if you're not ready, please, tell it directly to my face," Urged Deadpool.
Both ponies sat in silence for a few moments. Hearing genuine concern from her coltfriend about her own wants, it made Twilight's heart swell. She eventually smiled, and leaned towards Deadpool.
"I'm ready," Whispered Twilight lovingly.
"You mean it?" Asked Deadpool.
"Yes, I do, Wade. I've known you long enough that I feel like I can trust you with being this intimate with me. The fact that you didn't want me to do it if I wasn't ready proves that my trust isn't misplaced. I want to do this with you. That is, if you're willing to as well," Said Twilight.
Deadpool looked into Twilight's eyes. He noticed that her anxiety had subsided, and was replaced with a warm aura. This caused him to smile.
"Well then, let's do it!" Said Deadpool excitedly.
Deadpool sat upright, and Twilight scooted closer to him. They both leaned in to kiss. Just as they were about to lock lips, a realization came to Twilight. With a gasp, she pulled herself away.
"What's wrong?" Asked Deadpool.
"I just realized, I don't have any protection! I think it's safe to say that neither of us wants to go out this late to get some. Maybe we should save this for tomorrow," Said Twilight.
(Celestia damn it! We haven't even got started, and we're already getting cucked!)
"Don't worry. I keep some condoms in the pouch thingies on my suit. It's over in the chair over there," Said Deadpool while pointing at the chair in front of the desk.
"You carry protection on you?" Asked Twilight.
"... I used to have a promiscuous love life, Twilight. Ever since I got together with you, I carried protection on me in anticipation of our first time," Admitted Deadpool.
"I guess I can't say that you never plan ahead for anything," Said Twilight.
Twilight used her magic to grab Deadpool's suit. Levitating it over to him, he rummaged through his suit's many pouches.
"Hey, Wade?" Said Twilight.
"Yeah?" Replied Deadpool.
"Would it be alright if you guide me tonight? I'm… inexperienced," Admitted Twilight.
"A virgin?" Clarified Deadpool.
"Yeah…," Admitted Twilight.
As Deadpool finally found a condom, a thought came to him. Placing the condom on the nightstand next to him, he smiled mischievously at his marefriend.
"Don't trust your notes will be much help?" Teased Deadpool.
As soon as he asked, Twilight blushed.
"Wh-What makes you think I studied ahead of time?!" Asked Twilight, stammering out of embarrassment.
Deadpool titled his head, and gave Twilight an blank look.
"I know, I know. You're right, I totally looked through all of my medical books and explicit romance novels," Admitted Twilight in defeat.
Deadpool couldn't help but laugh a little.
"It's fine. Here, I'll lay down," Said Deadpool, laying back down onto his back.
"Okay. Should I be doing something?" Asked Twilight.
"Get yourself comfortable, and lay on top of me," Instructed Deadpool.
Twilight carefully placed herself on top of Deadpool. Their faces were only a few inches apart.
"Now what?" Asked Twilight.
"Now, let's get back to that kiss," Replied Deadpool.
Twilight and Deadpool slowly locked lips. Any nerves that they had faded away as they kissed each other. It only took a few moments for passion to build up between them.
Fin.
Hey everypony! Hope you all enjoyed part two of the latest chapter of "Deadpool: Mercenary of Harmony"! Now, on to some important stuff. Last week, I apologized for the delay between chapters thirty-two and thirty-three. All I really have to say is coming up with an idea for this chapter that I was satisfied with, the length of parts one and two combined (originally chapter thirty-three was one big chapter), and life in general resulted in a massive delay. I have also wondered if I am losing motivation to write this story. Don't worry, it would not be permanent nor is it definitive, I just might need a break. If I decide to do so, I was thinking I would either have this story on hiatus and start a new one, or take a break from writing all together. Sorry for the rant, just wanted to make sure everyone knows I didn't disappear, and that you all know my current mindset when it comes to this story. Regardless of what I decide to do, I want to thank all of you for reading my fanfiction. I never expected it to get the amount of views, likes, favorites, and positive comments it has gotten both on here and on Fimfiction. Until next time, this has been ThePhantomArchives, and I hope you all have a magical day!