"No?" Lucy flinched at the accusation in his voice, and he immediately dialed it down despite the pain of her rejection tearing him up inside.
"I'm sorry, Tim. I don't want to hurt you, and it's killing me to say no-"
"Then why are you?"
She gave him an exasperated look. "Because you asked me for the wrong reasons."
"What? No, I… Lucy, I walked away from my unit and our tactical op today. Despite having enough officers in place, I'm facing severe repercussions, even a demotion." He ran a hand through his hair and gripped the back of his neck. "No matter the consequences, I'd do it again."
"I never asked you to make such a reckless decision. And for crying out loud, you're proving my point." Lucy threw her hands in the air, her frustration and disappointment palpable between them.
His desperation to make her understand rose. "When I heard you call for backup, the gunfire almost drowned out your words, and when Harper didn't get a response from you… I don't know what went through my mind… I needed to find you. To hold you, and know you're protected…." He realized the moment he finished speaking and met her furious gaze. He misspoke.
"Wow. I also never realized you held such little faith in my abilities."
"No." He backtracked. "You're a damn fine officer, and I have complete faith in you and your abilities." Fuck, this whole situation's derailed, and he didn't know how to get them back on track.
"Then why are you acting like I can't do my job without you?"
"Lucy, It's not…." Tim trailed off, searching for the right words. Shit. He is fucking this up.
"I think we need a break." Her words froze him in place. She wanted to end things with him?
"What? Lucy, no." Fuck, he sounded like a broken record. His chest tightened, and he found it hard to breathe at the idea of her walking out the door for good.
"I'm not walking away," she said, with her uncanny ability to read his mind. "Or breaking up with you. We need a bit of space. I'm going to crash with Tamara." It killed him she needed distance, but it eased the vice-like sensation around his chest, knowing she'd be mere steps away.
"Alright. I understand." Though, not sure he did. He took hold of her hands, and when Lucy didn't resist, Tim pulled her into a hug and pressed a kiss to her forehead. He breathed in her familiar scent. Please don't let it be for the last time. Then he let her go, grabbed his jacket, and headed to the station.
"YOU SAID NO?"
When Tamara opened her door and took in Lucy's dejected figure, her chaotic energy enveloped and soothed her bruised and confused heart. Right now, though, she didn't need Tamara alerting the neighbors to the little bombshell she dropped.
"Yeah, but then he doubted my abilities. What does that say when he trained me?" Lucy asked, trying to get to the heart of the issue.
"Did he, though? Or did he do his… Timspeak thing?"
Lucy covered her mouth and coughed when the mouthful of water went down the wrong way. "Tim speak?"
Tamara waved her hand in the air, searching for the right words. "Yeah, you know, the way he's this combination of abrupt and deeply honest." She shrugged her shoulders and smiled. "Throw in how in love he is with you, and he ended up exposing the most vulnerable parts of himself with brutal honesty."
Lucy sat back, closing her mouth, which had fallen open with Tamara's uncanny insight. "How'd you get this smart?"
Tamara shrugged, then laughed before jumping into Lucy's arms, giving her a fierce hug. "Don't know. Maybe you had something to do with it." Pulling back, she grabbed Lucy's phone off the coffee table and held it out. "Here. You need your ladies. Fire up the group chat and find out who wants to let loose at a club with you tonight. You're gonna need it."
A look of sadness flashed across Tamara's features, but Lucy didn't get to ask why before her young charge took a deep breath and spilled. "My friends want to rent this house off campus, and they've asked me to move in with them."
"Oh. Okay. Is this something you want to do?" Tamara's expression turned to one of giddy excitement. A look which told Lucy everything she needed to know. "Of course you do." She leaned in and hugged her. "Tim and I will miss having you here, but this will be good for you."
"I'll show you pictures of the place, but." Tamara's gaze traveled over the converted garage space. "It sucks. Tim worked hard to create this space for me, which, let's be real, he did for you."
Lucy clasped her hand, ceasing Tamara's fidgeting. "Hey, don't brush off what Tim did for you. He cares about you like I do. And I promise we'll be okay."
"You're right. I wore Tim down until he adored me," she smirked. "But are you sure? You turned down his proposal. It must've hurt him."
"It broke my heart to turn him down, but it doesn't change the fact he asked me out of fear."
"But it doesn't mean he doesn't love you."
Lucy shrugged. "I'm secure enough in our relationship to know he's it for me. I want to marry him someday." She sat up straighter. "I will marry him someday, but I also need him to ask me for the right reasons."
"I get it. The man who captures my attention will go to great lengths to keep it. I deserve nothing less."
Lucy pulled Tamara in for another hug. "Ugh. I'm going to miss you. Promise you'll come over for dinner when you can."
"Promise. Thank you, Lucy. Thank you for sticking your neck out for me and giving me the first stable home I remember. Love you."
"Love you, too."
"Did you even have a ring?" Angela asked after he filled her in on what happened.
"Uh, not exactly," Tim said, looking up from the coffee he was staring at instead of drinking.
"It's a yes or no, Bradford."
"Geez, Angela. No. Okay?"
"Why are men so clueless about this stuff?"
Tim bit his tongue; her question was more of a statement.
"Listen, it's obvious to everyone how much you love each other, but I'm guessing it's not why you asked her, and there lies the problem."
"Of course, I asked her because I love her." Angela pursed her lips and stared him down. "Okay. Okay. There might be another reason I asked her, but it's a damn good one."
Angela's brow arched, and Tim heard a distinct "MmHm." She sat forward, elbows on her knees. "Well?"
"I'm scared I'll lose her, alright?"
"Now, we're getting somewhere. I understand why Lucy turned you down."
"Gee, thanks."
Angela rolled her eyes. "Seriously, clueless. Lucy doesn't want you to ask because you're scared. She wants you to ask because you love her. And I'm sure she wanted something more romantic than a middle-of-the-night panic proposal."
"Fuck. When you put it that way… even after what I went through with Isobelle. I've never felt this intensity for anyone other than Lucy. It's the scariest fucking thing I've ever faced."
Angela gave his shoulder a comforting squeeze. "You're allowed to be scared. It's what keeps you focused and on your toes, but it can't be the reason you ask her to spend the rest of her life with you, though."
"You don't think it's too soon to ask her to marry me?"
"Well, since you already asked her, it's a little late to seek opinions, but I'm still going to give one. The two of you have danced around each other from day one. Cost me fifty bucks picking the wrong date for when you'd get together." Angela leaned back in her chair. "But I'm willing to offer my help for some inside info on when you're gonna get married."
Tim let go of the breath he held in a whoosh. "For real? You're a bunch of assholes," he said with a laugh. It's true. He raked in his share of cash over the years, and it was all in good fun. With the intensity of their jobs, they needed ways to break up the complex parts. "Who won?"
"Smitty, of all people. The fucker."
"You believe I can fix this?" Tim asked when they fell silent.
"With my help, you will. I got your back, boo. It's what your BFF is for."
"I'm too old for BFFs," he scoffed.
Angela shot daggers his way. "BFF. It's not plural. You only get one."
He cracked a smile for the first time since Lucy crashed with Tamara. "Thanks, Angela."
"Hey, you rocked your MoH duties, and I know I'll be your Best Lady. I'm in if you need me to work my magic now."
"Aren't you worried you're getting ahead of yourself? Lucy's already turned me down once."
"Pfft. You got this." Angela's phone chimed, and a cunning smile spread across her face; reading the message before she pinned him with her intense gaze. "Check if the guys can get together. The nanny's on duty tonight. Wesley's free."
"Huh? Why am I organizing a guy's night?"
"Your girl wants a lady's night out. Says she needs to blow off some steam." Angela gave him some serious side-eye, telling him she knew why. "Get on your boy group chat, I know y'all have, and organize a poker night or something because we're taking Lucy out," she said while her phone pinged with incoming responses.
"Alright. We got three months to get things right."
"What?"
"If you want to win, pick the anniversary of our first date." It was the day he wanted to ask her before he panicked last night. Fuck, he hoped he hadn't ruined things.
Angela's face lit up with a smile. "Aw. Sweet. You got my help with whatever you need." She held her fist up for a bump, and he bumped her knuckles with his.
Their conversation ended when Sergeant Grey rapped on the door and entered. "Bradford. You're wanted over in Metro. Now." Tim stiffened, and Angela gave him a questioning look, which he ignored as his stomach sank.
"Yes, sir." He'd fucked up more than his personal life. With no time to explain things to Angels, Tim braced himself for the dressing down he deserved when Grey followed him out the door.
"THANK YOU," Lucy shouted in Angela's ear over the music. The pulsing beat of the music is what she needed. Celina, Nyla, and Bailey took over the dance floor while she and Angela grabbed their drinks. More than anything, she needed to know Tim was okay, and if he confided in anyone, it'd be Angela.
"Is he alright?"
Angela pursed her lips, contemplating her answer. "He'll be fine. And for the record, I understand why you said no. He'll get it right next time."
Lucy snorted, the buzz from her two drinks loosening her lips. "If there's a next time."
Angela rolled her eyes. "Of course, there'll be a next time. He loves you." Lucy swallowed down the emotions, trying to break free. She wanted to let go tonight, not wallow. Angela bumped her shoulder after the bartender dropped off their drinks. "Don't worry. Things have a way of working out how they're supposed to."
"You okay?" John asked, giving Tim the concerned father expression he must have perfected years ago while dealing their next hand of cards.
Tim didn't get a moment to appreciate the sentiment. He and Angela might be BFFs, but she kept nothing from her husband, which meant Wesley answered for him when he didn't respond fast enough.
"Angela says he fucked things up with Lucy."
"Oh, shit. What did you do?" Aaron asked, throwing down two of his cards for John to give him two more.
Tim tried to diffuse Wesley's taunt while ignoring Aaron's eagerness for gossip. "I did not fuck up."
"Angela has a different opinion on the subject, and for the record, she's not wrong." Wesley sorted his cards. The smirk on his face said he enjoyed this all way too much.
"Okay, maybe I fucked up," Tim conceded. "But I'm working on a way to fix it."
"I knew something changed when Angela picked a new date in the pool. I mean…," Aaron stumbled over his words like he'd revealed the world's biggest secret, making Tim roll his eyes.
"Of course, I know about the latest pool. And you assholes aren't getting any insider information from me," he said, pointing at each of them around the table.
When he returned from his run the following morning, a surge of relief hit Tim when he found Lucy in their kitchen. "Hi." Tim devoured her with his gaze. He didn't care if one day passed, he fucking missed her. "I missed you."
She looked up from the eggs and bacon she plated and gave him a soft smile. "I missed you, too." She set the plates next to their coffees. "I figured you'd be hungry and maybe a little hungover like I am. Protein and grease for the win?"
In her way, Lucy showed him how she wanted them back on solid ground. Relief filled him, and the tension Tim carried the last couple of days disappeared when he opened his arms, and she burrowed against his chest. Where she belonged.
"Are we okay?" she asked.
He pressed a kiss to her temple. "Yeah, we're more than okay."
Lucy shuddered in his arms. "I'm sorry. It's not… I mean… I want to say yes, but…."
"And I want you to say yes without using the word but when you say it. There's nothing to forgive. Is it okay to put the proposal conversation in a box and unpack it later?"
"Yeah, we can do that."
Lucy tipped her head back, and Tim cradled her face between his palms. "We're solid, I promise," he said, punctuating each word with a kiss. "I love you, Lucy."
"I love you, too," Lucy whimpered against his lips. Their kiss deepened, each gripping the other tighter. Their desire to get closer and reconnect consumed them.
"You still hungry?" he asked between trailing heated kisses down her throat to her collarbone.
"Not for food."
Tim growled and nipped the sensitive skin at the base of her throat. Then he lifted her into his arms and carried her into their bedroom.
Lucy may not be wearing his ring or ready to take his last name, but she would. And well, goddamn, if Lucy Bradford didn't sound fucking perfect.