Back after years of hellish health and family being awful... I hope you all enjoy this update (and the updates for my other stories)!
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Show Me Where Your Love Lies
Chapter 13
"Hey," Midoriya added, reaching out to grasp the frosted appendage. "I wouldn't have brought you here for dinner if mom and I didn't consider you part of the family. You can trust me, Shoto."
Todoroki stared at where they were connected, entranced. Midoriya's hand was warm against his own, not painfully hot like the hellfire he was so used to feeling. But the gentle heat wasn't drained away by his own icy temperature either. It was constant, unwavering, comforting... just like the person it emanated from.
He was so caught up in the sensation that he almost didn't realize Midoriya had used his first name. When deciding on hero names way back in high school, Todoroki defaulted to his given name because he wasn't interested in being popularized. Since his debut, he'd heard it spoken thousands of times by thousands of voices. Midoriya himself had used it the first time they'd met—and yet now it sent lightning through his veins.
Todoroki let his eyes wander for what seemed like an eternity before finally working up the courage to look at Midoriya's face. The warmth seeping through his skin was mirrored in Midoriya's tender expression. It offered connection but didn't insist on it; where they went from here was entirely up to Todoroki and his decision wouldn't be judged. He wouldn't lose Midoriya if he shied away as he had done every time before.
"I do..." he finally murmured. "I do trust you, Izuku."
The brilliance of Midoriya's smile was worth the terror of letting someone in and somehow, Todoroki wondered how he'd ever been worried to begin with. Even when Inko walked in with the food, his guard didn't immediately return, at least not in full force.
"Alright you two!" the woman chimed happily. "Let's eat!"
~0.0~
"We really can't stay Mom, but I promise we'll come back again soon! Actually, Shoto is a really good cook so maybe you can come and visit us, and we will cook for you!" Midoriya stated happily, squishing his mother to his chest as if it was the last time he would ever see her.
Todoroki watched with the faintest bit of envy in his heart, the same confused longing he'd felt the first time he'd been here and seen them interacting. This was how families were supposed to interact, he supposed, but it was still so foreign to him.
Even as a child Todoroki had a keen understanding of how abusive and dysfunctional his home life was. Yet, in some paradoxical and warped way, it seemed normal. In the rare instances where he caught a glimpse of another person's reality, he truly believed it couldn't be real. It wasn't as if he didn't understand that other families weren't constantly shouting and hurting one another... but that was all he'd ever known and ultimately what he'd chosen to believe in.
Now, in this loving home with people who not only willingly showed their feelings for one another, but also readily accepted him with all his flaws, Todoroki couldn't help but dare to dream about having this for himself one day... To be cared for when present. To be missed when gone.
Fuyumi loved him. So did Natsuo, he supposed. But they weren't close and in their own ways they were as emotionally damaged as he was. Todoroki wasn't sure that they'd ever be able to fully repair their relationships to one another and even if they could, unabashed affection like the Midoriya's displayed towards one another was too far-fetched to even consider.
No, Todoroki was certain that the only people whom he could ever hope might fawn over him one day were the two people saying their goodbyes before him, and that realization made his stomach twist. He quickly dropped his gaze back down to the floor, scolding himself. They shouldn't even have to say goodbye at all. It was only happening because of his arrogant mistake at the bank... He shouldn't want that kind of attention from the people he'd caused such distress, especially since it was still ongoing.
"Now you, son!"
Todoroki's gaze snapped back to his host; certain he'd misheard. The woman had released Midoriya and was holding her arms out expectantly. As if in some cheesy comedy, he gestured to himself like there was someone else she could have been speaking to. But he couldn't find the will to move toward her, even when she nodded and gestured with her hands for him to come. Inko simply crossed the distance herself when he remained frozen in place, unaffected by his tense posture and nervousness.
"Shoto..." he heard her coo into his sternum, her voice soft and consoling as she wrapped her small arms around him. "A friend of Izuku's is a child of mine and I won't stand for any of my children to think they aren't wanted here. This is your home now too and you are always welcome. You understand?"
Numbly, Todoroki nodded that he did, but a great part of him was still lost and confused. This feeling, different from how it felt being held by Izuku, was something he vaguely remembered from a very long time ago. It hurt like breaking ribs, a faint memory of being loved by his own mother leading to dry tears burning his eyes.
She'd been so afraid of him the last time they'd seen one another and the way she'd looked at him was something he would never forget... The same look she wore whenever his father had been around. If Inko and Midoriya knew the truth about him, their declarations of affection and offer of family would be revoked. Of that, Todoroki was sure.
Despite this, he found himself returning the embrace, if only to cling to the illusion that this was something he could truly have. Midoriya was staring at him when he finally willed himself to pull out of the hug, a gentle sadness in his small smile.
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Todoroki was exhausted. Uncertain of how to feel about his interactions with Inko the night before, he'd tossed and turned all night, barely sleeping. Yet being near Midoriya as he giggled and clumsily attempted to help make breakfast lessened the burden in his heart… until the young man received a text, that is. Though diligent about ensuring their food didn't burn, Todoroki was able to see Midoriya tense and then deflate, his smile thinning into a tightly clamped line.
"Is everything alright, Izuku?" Todoroki asked, concerned.
Midoriya nodded stiffly, stuffing his phone back into his pocket without responding to the message. "It was just Tenya… You know, wanting to finalize plans for our group outing."
Immediately, Todoroki was also on edge. He knew how dear these 'friends' were to his roommate. The hesitance and stress swirling in those deep green eyes was his fault, and not just because he'd gotten them into this situation. Midoriya knew how psychologically fragile he was right now. All the meticulously built walls that had protected him for so long were gone, leaving him with faltering self-esteem and hypersensitivity.
Todoroki wanted to be selfish, knowing that if he showed his unease, Midoriya would back out of the get-together entirely to protect him, with no hesitation. But that wasn't right; he'd already given up so much for Todoroki's comfort and well-being. Not being ready wasn't an excuse; he could do this, for Midoriya's sake.
"Did they decide where you all will be going?" Todoroki questioned, doing his absolute best to seem neutral on the topic.
As expected, Midoriya was quick to look up, analyzing his face as he finished plating their food and brought it to the table. There wasn't suspicion in his eyes, however, but uncertainty. He wasn't the type to doubt another person, but it was evident he'd been expecting to be met with some level of discomfort or resistance.
Nodding, Midoriya continued examining as he spoke. "They want to go to the UA School Festival. It's the first year it's been opened up to the public since everything happened while I was in school."
"Hm." Todoroki hummed, contemplating. In truth, he couldn't remember ever having gone to the event, even as a student. At that point in his life, sticking it to his father was his only priority. Frivolous events that didn't bring him closer to his goals were simply ignored.
Unlike other places they could go though, the group was unlikely to hide their identities, meaning Todoroki would be thrust into another situation like he'd experienced while speaking with Aizawa's new class. It wouldn't matter whether he was by Midoriya's side or lurking nearby, his presence wouldn't go unnoticed... and likely wouldn't be appreciated.
"We really don't have to go, Shoto!" Midoriya exclaimed, having found the fear and doubt Todoroki had been doing his best to hide. "I can suggest another place that isn't so crowded and is closer to here. We're still under that quirks' influence, right? It wouldn't be good if we had an episode in the middle of UA's festival, especially since this is their trial run for reopening it to the public. Don't worry, I'll—"
"It's fine." Todoroki interrupted, though doing so made him sick to his stomach. "I agreed to this and I'm certain that the students would be very pleased to have you there supporting them."
Midoriya once again puffed out his cheeks and rubbed the back of his neck stressfully. Todoroki was all too aware of just how adept the young man had become at reading his behavior; there was no doubt he'd seen the flash of nausea and fear that no one else in the world would have noticed or cared about.
"I don't…" Midoriya started, eyebrows furrowed with concern and determination when he finally refocused on Todoroki. "If I agree to go to the festival, I want you there with me—and I don't mean just hiding out somewhere nearby. This whole get-together is supposed to be about me spending time with my friends... and you're my friend, Shoto."
Todoroki didn't even try to hide the uneasy gulp that struggled to get past the lump in his throat. Midoriya may feel that way, but the rest of the 'Deku-Squad' definitely didn't. Not to mention the multitude of students, heroes, and citizens who hadn't liked him to begin with due to his lineage and overall personality. Now they hated him even more due to speculation that he was the one at fault for 'Deku' being benched for months.
"Anyone who has a problem with you can take it up with me," Midoriya stated with confidence, smile renewed. "Besides, we could always attempt incognito again; I doubt my other friends would mind since they'd get to actually enjoy the festivities."
Todoroki wasn't completely sold on this idea, but he truly did want to repay Midoriya for all he'd done to help him these past few months. He could make it through one day…
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"Oh hell no." Bakugo snapped, angrily typing out a response to Midoriya's latest text before his phone was deftly swiped by Kirishima. "Hey! Give me that back you bastard!"
"Not a chance, Katsu. Izuku wants Todoroki to come along with us and we can't call ourselves men if we throw a fit over it." The redhead responded insistently, slipping the phone into his pocket until his lover calmed down.
Bakugo ground his teeth, conflicted. From his constant pestering, he'd learned that Todoroki had apparently had several personality breakthroughs, not unlike himself in his younger years.
But the damn nerd was as fragile as he was strong. Japan was finally getting back on its feet and Deku was now in full control of every aspect of One For All. But the vestiges had all passed on in peace after All for One and Shigaraki's defeat, leaving the young heroes' psyche without constant reassurance and guidance. Certainly, Midoriya had grown to trust in himself, but Bakugo was the only person other than All Might to know about the consistent nightmares he had about the future.
The world knew that Midoriya had a quirk called 'One for All' but the exact origin and workings were never publicly announced. Yoichi, the first wielder, had suggested that another quirkless person may be able to accept One for All, but that just wasn't realistic anymore.
Not only were the 'powerless' increasingly rare, but One for All was still stockpiling power. Sure, their 'cup' may be empty due to quirklessness, but Midoriya had been quirkless too and it hadn't mattered; he'd been 'broken' repeatedly while trying to gain control over the hurricane of pure force—and it had only gotten stronger since then.
Midoriya could very well be the last wielder of the power that had saved their world, something that haunted the young pro. Evil had been beaten and society was purer than ever, but how long would that last? What if a new All for One rose to power again?
"It's not being around Icy-Hot that I'm pissed about, Ei," Bakugo explained tensely. "It's everyone else. The public is uneasy about the rise in crime and still traumatized by the shit we dealt with in high school. Do you really think that they won't get pissed if they see the person they blame for Deku's medical leave enjoying a festival like it's no big deal?"
Bakugo huffed in annoyance, tapping his toes on the sidewalk as they took a break from patrolling. "Deku will take anything bad said about him or Icy-Hot personally. Even with the rest of our group around, there's too big of a risk of some asshole coming up to them and starting shit."
Kirishima sighed but stared at his boyfriend with unending love and admiration. Bakugo had arrived at UA as nothing more than an egotistical asshole, but he'd grown and matured so much since then. Though it was true he was still abrasive, those who knew him well were aware it came from a good place; he cared deeply about his friends, especially Midoriya.
"I know you're worried about Izuku, Katsuki…" Kirishima stated with a comforting pat on his muscled shoulder. "But come on man, think about it. Todoroki is bound to get slammed by critics no matter when he's seen in public… Maybe if we do this festival thing Deku can work his magic and change people's minds. Plus, we can show our support if anyone starts acting unmanly, right?"
Bakugo grumbled but considered his lover's words. The 'Deku-Squad' consisted exclusively of heroes ranked in Japan's Top 20 as well as Hatsume, whose invention skills were only rivaled by Melissa Shield—another close friend of Deku's. If they followed Midoriya's lead and stood in solidarity with Todoroki, it would definitely make a statement.
"Fine, but if I go along with this damn festival idea then I expect something in return," Bakugo stated petulantly. "I get full rights to shout at any idiot kids that bother me, and you have to do what you promised and wear your hair down."
The redhead snorted with laughter, finding the 'compromise' to be so endearingly Bakugo. "Okay babe, you've got a deal!"
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As always, thank you for reading and for your patience with my health problems! I'm updating most of my stories, so, check them out if you're interested!