What?

Another chapter? Yes. Look at me improving. Pray it last, my darlings.

Please forgive any mistakes-I am currently half asleep.

Thank you again for reading my story

Here goes!

Chapter 18

'…sources say a policeman may have still been in the building as it went down in flames.'

Rukia frantically searched for her phone. She found it lodge between the couch cushions.

11.13pm.

No messages.

No news was good news, right?

But still…

With shaking fingers, she called Ichigo. She got his voicemail and felt immediately nauseous.

It could have been any policeman, she rationalized. If it was Ichigo, someone would've have told her.

Wouldn't they? Or did they think she hated him so much that she wouldn't care if he died.

Her anxiety was like cement blocks on her chest.

Five minutes later, she tried again.

And again, another five minutes later.

With each, unanswered call, her blood pressure rose.

Quickly, she called Rangiku.

'Hiiii, my dearest, loveliest friend,' Rangiku chirped. 'I love you soooo much!'

Great, Rangiku was drunk.

'Rangiku, where's Ichigo?'

'I don' know. His apartment, prolly.'

'It's fine. I'll ask Chad.'

'Chad's here wi'me. Hol'on. Chad, where's Ichigo? Rukia wants to know. He say's Ichigo went dome.'

'Dome?'

'HHHOOomne.'

Home. Ichigo went home.

She would only breathe easy if she saw him well and alive.

Rukia grabbed her car keys and drove like a mad person.

She went through the front of his apartment building this time. Each second waiting for the elevator was a torture in its own right.

Rukia banged on the door frantically.

No answer.

'Ichigo! You better open this door!', she pleaded, her voice sounding desperate even to her own ears.

She knocked again and again until her knuckles turned red.

'Dear, are you alright?'

Rukia turned around to find an old lady with a kind face looking curiously at her from her doorway opposite Ichigo's.

'I'm so sorry I woke you up, ma'am.'

'Don't fret, dear. I was reading my book when I heard the ruckus.'

'I'm really sorry,' Rukia apologized again.

'He is a good boy, you know. Doesn't smile much but always fetches my groceries and fixes what needs fixing. Better than any of my rotten grandchildren.'

Of course, her Ichigo would do that. It didn't surprise her one bit.

'All I'm saying is that he definitely isn't out with another girl somewhere,' the old lady continued.

'Oh, no that's not why-I'm just worried about him.'

The old lady smiled.

'It must be difficult being with a policeman but Ichigo is strong. I am sure he will be home soon.'

Rukia just nodded. She didn't even bother to correct the lady about her relationship with Ichigo. She couldn't bring herself to say that she had made him hate her. Really hate her this time.

'Would you like to wait inside?'

'That's very kind of you, but I think I should go home.'

She had no right to be here, waiting for him like this. Had no right to worry over him.

'Well, I'll make sure he gives you a call.'

Rukia smiled and the old lady went back inside.

She would try calling one more time, then she would go home, she told herself.

She slid her hand into her pocket and was met with nothing but the fabric of her pyjama shorts.

Fuck.

She had forgotten her phone.

What if someone from the precinct had tried calling her? What if they were going to tell her that he hadn't gone home? That they had found his body in the wreckage? What if she was waiting for his ghost?

Rukia dropped to a crouch and pushed her palms against her eyes until they hurt.

She was such an idiot. She had said such terrible, untrue things. How could she let him believe all of it? Now, she could never make things right. She could never tell him how grateful she was to him. Or just how incredible she thought he was. All the things she had wanted to say, she would have to say to his tombstone.

Like she had done with Kaien, and her sister before that.

'Rukia?'

She lifted her head slowly, and there he was, crouched down next to her.

Alive.

He tucked her hair behind her ear and asked 'Are you alright? Are you hurt?'

Even after everything she had put him through, he was still gentle with her, stilled so concerned.

A sobbed broke from her and tears spilled out uncontrollably.

Ichigo was miserable.

He didn't how to fix things with Rukia, didn't know how to deal with her indifference. Today when he asked Chad to go with him, he knew Chad was busy, knew that Rukia was with him in the breakroom. He had foolishly hoped that when Chad refused, Rukia would volunteer go with him. He would have asked her go himself, but she didn't even acknowledge him in the slightest and he was angry all over again.

She was a brick wall, and he just didn't know what to do anymore.

So, the last thing he expected was to see, after returning from his father's house, was Rukia in her pyjamas, huddled by his door.

All his anger dissipated when he saw her.

When she looked up at him with tears in her eyes, it broke his heart. Whatever made Rukia Kuchiki cry like must have been something really terrible.

'I-I thought…they said a cop was in that building that caught fire, the-the one you went to-I thought I lost you.'

A current of emotion hit him so hard that he almost misbalanced.

She had been crying for him. This strong, unbreakable woman was crying for him.

'Let's get you inside,' he said, brushing her tears away with his thumb.

He sat her on the couch and before he could say anything, she was apologizing.

'I'm so sorry, Ichigo. I don't de-I'm so, so, so, sorry,' she sniffled, burying her face in her small hands.

He sat on the edge of the coffee table, his knees bracketing hers, and gently prised her hands away, keeping them in his grip.

'Hey, hey. There's nothing to apologize for. It's okay. Really. I promise.'

He would do anything to stop her tears; he would sell his soul to see her smile again.

'No, it's not. I-you didn't deserve any of it. I never should have pushed you away like that.'

It didn't matter. None of it mattered. He wanted nothing more than to gather her in his arms and hold her until she was okay again.

'All you did was help me, and I hurt you,' she said, roughly wiping her face with the back of her hand. 'I'm a horrible person, and I know you hate me, but I just need you to know-' tears filled her eyes, yet again.

He hated seeing her like that. All he wanted to do was make it better.

She took a breath and continued, though her voice still shook. 'I need you to know that I'm glad it was you that found me.'

She stood, 'I'm gonna go now. I know I said I wouldn't come her anymore. I'm sorry.'

It was the desolation in her voice that cleaved him in two.

Before she could slip away, he wrapped his arms around her and drew her closer.

With his mouth against hers he whispered, 'Don't go.'

When she didn't move, he softly touched his lips to hers.

He pulled away, just enough to look into her glistening eyes. 'I could never hate you, Rukia. I would do anything for you-if you would let me.'

'I really thought it was you in that fire. I was so afraid,' she all but whispered.

'I went home. To my father's house. Family dinner and all that,' he explained, wishing that he had done something to bridge their distance earlier-then she wouldn't be this sad and distraught.

She brought a hand to his face, and finally, finally she smiled at him. A small, shy, almost rueful smile-but a smile nonetheless.

He returned her smile and covered her hand with his. He turned his head to kiss her palm, then moved her hand to his chest, right where his heart thumped madly. He wanted her to know just how she affected him; that he wasn't just saying things. He wanted her to know that he meant every word.

Then, with her hand still on his heart, he kissed her. This kiss was different from the one she initiated in her apartment. That was mostly lust.

This. This was gentle.

Reverent.

A true first kiss.

Rukia opened eyes, her sleep breaking like it always did.

Except this time, Ichigo's arm was slung across her midsection, and his leg was on hers, his soft breath, warm on her shoulder.

Tentatively, she ran her fingers through his hair. It was just as soft as she remembered it. When her fingers touched his scalp, he hummed and pulled her closer, his nose brushing the skin of her throat. She didn't want to wake him, so she stopped her ministration.

But when she removed her hand from his hair, Ichigo's hand caught hers and placed it back on his head.

Rukia chucked softly, and Ichigo sighed contently as she continued her ministrations.

'When I first saw you, I thought you were the most beautiful person I'd ever seen,' he confessed, eyes closed, voice husky with sleepy.

Her fingers stilled again. Was he dreaming?

With his eyes still close, he pressed his lips to her throat, and then tucked her head beneath his chin.

Rukia felt crying again-for different reasons, this time.

She squeezed her eyes shut, and buried her face in his chest, letting his warmth and affection lull her back to sleep.