Tyrion Lannister
Kings Landing, 300AC
He hated Kings Landing.
He'd never said so aloud but anyone who was good at reading faces would have noticed it. Then again, he could probably put it down to the sour scent of piss and shit and rot. It had been years since he had last set foot in the capital, and now he was being ordered to live here. Something he did not want to do. But even Tywin's own children knew not to cross him. An order was an order. Much like his wonderful sister was given to Robert Baratheon after the rebellion to be his Queen because King Scab rejected her as Rhaegar's Queen. Whilst many things said King had done was awful, even Tyrion was aware that was a good move.
Lannister men flanked the walls outside of the city, capes of Lannister red decorating the tops of the walls with heads coated in tar to preserve them for longer dotted here and there. Wondering which one of them was Lord Eddard's. Closing his eyes for a moment at the sheer stupidity of the move. At least they still had two Stark's to trade. Not ideal, but with the correct moves certainly doable.
The journey took them nearing a month. Normally, it would've been much shorter but with having to weave around the squabbling Baratheon brothers almost doubled it. Before travelling here would've despised it, the wheelhouse he travelled in always making his stunted and twisted legs cramp more than they usually did. This time though was different. It gave him time to think everything over and come to some conclusions. To say they were fucked was an understatement at best.
The conclusion he had come to regarding Jon Snow had no proof as of yet, but he knew deep within it was true. Eddard Stark's honour was held in high regard (or in stupidity, depending on who was asked), and it was known he never lied. The fight he had with Robert Baratheon over the Targaryen children was common knowledge across the Kingdom's. A part of him was giddy about confronting his sister about it because she was told for years she would marry Rhaegar no matter what and would birth him children with dashing silver hair and violet eyes. She would be livid, and the sheer thought that if she attempted anything with him would rain their father down on her was glorious.
Tyrion tried his best to remember what he could of the 'bastard' of Winterfell. When he had travelled to the North he had always kept to the shadows. Had he known then? If he did, he had to commend the boy for not immediately throttling his dearest goodbrother for what had happened. If the roles were switched, he would've done something. But if he hadn't known, when had he found out? The timeline was tight if this were correct.
No, there were two options.
The first was he had known when they had all visited and miraculously managed to keep quiet on it. The second was he didn't know and he found out sometime to them arriving and Lord Eddard leaving for the capital with his daughters. Things were shattered, and it left them very few options.
Then again, would it?
Rhaegar Targaryen was wed to Elia Martell. Whilst it wasn't unknown for a Targaryen to take multiple wives, the Faith would not like it. Nor did they like annulments, many seeing it as a betrayal of vows to the Seven. He wasn't a pious man, but appearances had to be kept up. A sense of calmness overcoming him. It was likely the boy was still a bastard, and bastard Targaryen's had a sour taste for many with the numerous failed Blackfyre rebellions. The last being slain by none other than Ser Barristan. That was another stupid move, having him removed from the Kingsguard. He would've had key information and might've given some insight. But now House Selmy were heavily insulted and would either flock to someone else or remain neutral which left one ally less.
There were three routes they could go down. The first being the Iron Islands. They had a formidable fleet that was only beaten by the Redwyne's and the Velaryon's. A fleet patrolling the Blackwater would be ideal. If they offered them food and areas to raid and pillage as they pleased they might be swayed. A move as such would not be received well though so that would be a last resort option. The second was the Vale even if his father would hate it after Lady Lysa insulted House Lannister by taking him prisoner with little to no evidence for a crime he did not commit. But they did have a fantastic army and if the words he had heard on his journey down were accurate, had opted to remain neutral. If they were to depose of her in some way, Lord Robyn was a piece. Perhaps betrothing him to his niece? They were of a similar age, but he cringed internally as he recalled the boy still suckling at his mothers teat.
The last option was Dorne. Probably the riskiest bet of them all. The Martell's understandably held no love for his own House, but if the claims the Targaryen bastard was making were true, they would likely take it as an insult to their precious Princess too. It would have to be spun in a very specific way and would likely need to stroke an ego or two. Perhaps wedding Princess Arianne to his nephew? He almost snorted at the thought. Most people were aware of the Princess' reputation, Cersei would not allow a harlot near her precious boy. Which left his niece or his younger nephew. He shook his head at this as the wheelhouse finally came to a stop a couple of hundred metres from the Old Gate.
The moment they were through the gates, the stench reached a level he never thought was possible. Screwing his nose slightly and breathing through his mouth so he would not need to put up with it. It was worse than he remembered it being which was saying something. People were looking out of their homes and some were on the streets begging for food. Some even tearing off mouldy portions of bread to eat the parts that weren't. Last he heard there was plenty of food in the capital, clearly they had been leeching off the Tyrell's. Great, another problem to add to the many there already were because of the damned war his wretched nephew had started.
Initially upon arriving he had wanted to get out of the wheelhouse and walk around, but now he knew that would be a bad idea. People do horrid things when they are desperate. Instead stretching his legs as best he could in the cramped space and thought of being able to see Shae again in a few days. How he was going to get her into the Red Keep he did not know, but gods did he want to lay with her again. The large red castle now loomed overhead which had nerves rippling within. Making sure the parchment which confirmed his new appointment was still on his person. He didn't doubt his sister would have him executed for trying to stoop above his level, and her hatred was well known.
"Lord Tyrion, we did not expect you."
Were the first words that fell from the guards lips, he didn't recognise him at all though.
"Would you be so kind as to take me to the King and the Queen Mother?"
The guard was startled at the request but done as ordered, someone walking over to take his place. As expected, the castle was still ornately decorated, with hundreds of servants running around alongside many Knight's if the polished armour was anything to go by. None even paying him any attention nor was there an entourage to greet him. Wonderful, he would be able to play this to his advantage without issue. It meant his sister and nephew had no knowledge of him being here, meaning they would not expect him and would be taken off guard. And what better way to get information? He had to know what this confession Lord Eddard made before he had been executed was. He'd tried to listen to the people as they travelled through the city from the window of the wheelhouse but all he heard were pleas for help.
Confusion clouded him as he was led to the other side of the Keep but it made sense as soon as he heard people speaking about a tourney for the King's name-day. Fourteen, still two years left to regency. Not that that would be any good. His sister had always dreamt of being Queen but as soon as she was Queen, she didn't care much about anyone beneath her. Relishing in the power she had acquired. The fact that a tourney was being held within the castle grounds was surprising at first but considering the war currently going on. There were only a couple of hundred people, but he soon spotted a golden crown atop his nephews head. Walking towards him.
"Beloved nephew! We looked for you on the battlefield and you were nowhere to be found."
By now he was stood in front of him and his betrothed. Of course, how could he forget he was betrothed to one of the Stark girls?
"I have been here, ruling the Kingdoms."
"And what a fine job you've done."
Joffrey's face soured at the remark but he had to hide his internal glee. It was always fun putting him in his place. It was bordering on treason, but being the Hand of the King was the second most lucrative position to be held. Instead turning to his niece and kissing her cheeks and speaking a little with Tommen. Unlike their older brother, they were kind. Tommen was certainly young enough to be moulded into a good leader, especially because he wasn't coddled as much as Joffrey.
"We heard you were dead."
Tyrion did not miss the insulted tone but this was covered up by Myrcella stating she was glad this was not the case.
"Death is so boring, Especially now with so much excitement in the world. My Lady, I am sorry for your loss."
Now, he looked her directly in the face and he had to fight his eyebrows from creasing. From his memory, Sansa Stark did not have dark brown eyes. That had been the younger one. Perhaps the wine was finally getting to him.
"Her loss? Her father was a confessed traitor-"
"Still her father. Surely having so recently lost your own you can sympathise."
The King's face reddened in anger now but he at least had the decency not to erupt on him in public. Gods, how had no one figured it out. It was obvious looking at the boy that Robert had not sired him. His father might turn a blind eye but Tyrion knew all along. Had even walked in on them once. He had wanted to out Cersei for her actions, she was someone who needed to be put in her place, but that would cause too much of a headache.
"My father was a traitor. My mother and brother are traitors too. I am loyal to my beloved Joffrey."
"Of course you are."
He felt bad for the girl. Seven hells, he'd feel bad for anyone who was dealt with the shit card of being his nephews betrothed. He'd heard the stories, of how he had cut open a pregnant cat as he wanted to see the kittens inside. Not to mention the numerous maids who left his chambers covered in bruises and blood. It had been kept rather quiet surprisingly, everyone knowing a King who took joy in such proclivities was not someone to be looked up to. Then the words caught his attention. Father, mother, and brother. She did not mention the cousin. Meaning it likely hadn't gotten out here yet. This was going to be a fun meeting. Or if she did know, she was smarter than he remembered. In order to survive the cesspit of backstabbers and liars, one could not be naïve.
"Well, enjoy your name-day your Grace. I wish I could stay and celebrate but there is work to be done."
A small smile came onto his face as Joffrey confusedly asked why he was here. Not wanting to ruin the small excitement this farce of a tourney was. The people deserved that at least. The guard who had escorted him out was joined by a few others, it not missing his sight all had their hands on their swords should the need arise. He'd never been in the council chamber of the Red Keep, being genuinely surprised by how small it was considering everything that is discussed in here. At some point, he had decided to irritate his sister as much as he could, test her patience to see what it was he was working with. Whistling quietly to himself as he took in who was seated around the table.
Grand Maester Pycelle, his sister, a balding man he did not recognise, Lord Varys, and Lord Petyr Baelish.
"Don't get up, more ravishing than ever big sister."
As protocol dictated, he walked over and kissed her on both cheeks even though he felt nothing but absolute disgust doing so. Which, judging by the expression on her face she felt just as much.
"Please forgive the interruption."
He hadn't even made his way to his seat before Cersei spoke.
"What are you doing here?"
To many, her honeyed words would've went over their head. But she was his sister, he knew her probably better than anyone seated at the table. He could sense there was nothing but poison seeping from her teeth. Deciding to irritate her even more. He needed to get everyone out (except perhaps Lord Varys), and to do so he needed to have her command them to do so because he had not confirmed why he was sent here.
"It's been a truly remarkable journey. I pissed off the edge of the Wall, I slept in a sky cell, I fought with the hill tribes. So many adventures and so much to be thankful for."
It worked a treat. Cersei's nostrils flaring as she repeated her question. The poison being as clear to everyone like fresh spring water. Fighting back a smile as now she had left an opening.
"It is the small council. Last I checked the Hand of the King is welcome at all small council meetings."
The balding mans and Grand Maester Pycelle's eyes widened slightly but the other two kept passive expressions. Of course they would know, nothing got past the pair of them.
"Father is Hand of the King."
Her voice was dangerously low now, very much sounding like a lioness about to attack her prey. She wanted him to back down. This was going to be interesting. Reaching for the scroll he had tucked away and placing it on the table.
"Yes, but in his absence-"
He was cut off when Lord Varys reached for the scroll. Obviously, making it look like he was unaware.
"Your father has named Lord Tyrion to serve as Hand in his stead while he fights-"
"Out! All of you out!"
Thank you Lord Varys. Without even trying much he had gotten her to order everyone out of the room. Such a pity, he wanted to toy with her more. Find out how long it took for the final string to snap. Alas, that would now need to wait for another day. She knocked her glass over as she stood to her feet, leaning over ever so slightly which would threaten many but to him she just looked ridiculous. No one questioned the order, all leaving the room as commanded. At least, make it look like they had left. He didn't doubt the spider and mockingbird would lurk just far away that they weren't seen to get information for whatever games they were playing.
"I would like to know how you tricked father into this."
He almost snorted again, her wounded pride not accepting anything other than trickery.
"If I were capable of tricking father I would be emperor of the world by now. You brought this on yourself."
Her lips tightened ever so slightly as she sat back down.
"I've done nothing-"
"Correct. You did nothing. When your son called for Ned Stark's head. Now the entire North has risen up against us-"
Emerald eyes flashed for a second.
"I tried to stop it-"
No, she was not getting the last word in.
"Did you? Well you failed. That piece of theatre will haunt our family for a generation."
"Robb Stark is a child-"
"Who has won every battle he has been in. Do you understand what losing the war costs us?"
She went quiet for a few seconds at this, now reaching for the jug of wine to pour himself a cup. The taste sourer than he usually liked and not a Dornish Red or an Arbor Gold. Likely some imitation one as they could not get the proper stuff.
"What do you know about warfare?"
Now, Cersei had a small smile on her face, clearly taking that remark as the end of the conversation.
"Nothing, but I do know people. I know that our enemies hate each other almost as much as they hate us."
"Joffrey is King-"
"Joffrey is King, but he is a child."
Her face didn't change once, clearly not catching the barb like he had hoped she would've. It was always fun when they were children to wind her up. If it weren't for Jaime, she probably would've found a way to have him have an 'accident'.
"Joffrey is King and you are here to advise him."
"Yes, I am only here to advise him. If the King listens to what I say the King might just get his uncle Jaime back."
Father more like. Not that he'd ever say it aloud. There were times where he was tempted to do just that, but that would ruin their family's reputation beyond any kind of repair. Cersei's eyes widened for a moment in hope but this was masked almost as quickly as it had appeared.
"How?"
The poison that had been there before no longer was, knowing he was getting through to her. Now, he needed to find out how much she knew.
"You love your children. It's your only redeeming quality alongside those cheekbones. The Stark's love their children as well. We have two of them."
She shifted for a second but it was all he needed. Seven hells, what had she done? Her face moving to the side and lips puckering slightly.
"We don't."
He laughed aloud at the incredulity of the statement. To the point it was echoing in the room. He had saw the eldest Stark girl outside with the King. But after a few moments, dread seeped in as he saw the shame on her face. And the only time Cersei willingly showed shame was when she felt like she had lost.
"What do you mean we don't have any?"
An ominous feeling trickled within him now, desperately trying to keep himself from launching across the table and smacking her for her stupidity. How did she lose them both?! And if she had lost them, who was the girl posing as Sansa?!
"Arya, the little animal, she disappeared."
"Disappeared in what? A puff of smoke?! And the other?"
"Someone broke her out of Maegor's Holdfast where she was locked up."
Fuck. That meant there was someone in the castle who was actively working against them. Not a surprising thought considering the name Lannister was a sour taste for many.
"We had three Stark's to trade. You chopped ones head off, let one escape, and allowed the other to be smuggled out. Father will be furious. It must be hard for you, being the disappointing child. Now answer my question. Who is it you have got impersonating the older. It had better be someone we can use to our advantage."
Her gaze dropped to the oak table which was all the confirmation that this was not the case.
"Jeyne Poole. She's the Steward's daughter."
A steward's daughter. Tyrion leaned over and pinched his nose as he tried to hold in his anger over his sisters horrid capability in ruling. It was a good thing she was simply Queen Mother and not The Queen. He dreaded what would happen if this were the case. The threads holding the Kingdom's together was now severed with what she had admitted to him. And this was before he had let out potentially the biggest secret Westeros ever held. Never would he have thought Eddard Stark capable of the highest treason.
"Tell me what happened the day of Ned Stark's trial. Word has gotten out about a confession, I wish to know what this confession was."
There was only a handful of things it could've been. One being he had found out the parentage of his niece and nephews. Another being what Lord Leo Lefford reported during the battle of Oxcross. Or Perhaps it was something else entirely.
"The words of dead men mean nothing-"
"I disagree. I wonder, was it whatever this confession was that caused my wonderful nephew to give the order or was he always going to give the order even if you had counselled him against such an action?"
Tyrion poured another glass of wine. The sour taste no longer being there now that he was getting used to it. Not that it tasted any better because it didn't.
"Lies. That was what the confession was-"
"That's not what I asked. I asked what the confession was and not what you believe it was. There is a difference, you should learn it. Then we might've not been in the situation we are currently."
Cersei's eyes flashed again but she at least knew it would be foolery to have him imprisoned because it would drive their father south. Something which would further open the Westerland's which could not happen. The Northern and Riverland men had already blocked all other entrances which was going to make getting armies almost impossible.
"Tell me what Lord Eddard Stark confessed. And if you lie, I will find out and I will write to father."
There was no bluff in his voice, and she noticed it too. As much as she hated to know it, he was her brother, and she knew him a little too well as a result. Whilst they had only saw one another a handful of times since she had been wed to Robert, it was enough for him to be able to read her like an opened book. She looked as though she was in great pain, thinking of a way to get around the threat. It was probably a stupid move on his part because since Joffrey is not yet sixteen she was the ruler. The puppeteer many would say. A truly terrifying thought.
"Lies. That is all you are getting. Now-"
"Was it that he outed your children as being fathered by our wonderful brother or was it that his sister birthed a son by Rhaegar Targaryen?"
His cheek felt hot, thoughts scrambling in his mind as it registered she had just slapped him.
"I am the Queen and I demand you leave-"
"You are Queen Mother. As far as titles go Hand of the King is higher than such."
If the gravity of this wasn't weighing everything down, Tyrion would've been filled with glee. He'd embarrassed, put her in her place, and had gotten her to feel stupid. Something not many people would dare.
"I will ask one more time, sister. Which one was it?"
"The latter."
That was what he hoped was not the case. Gods be damned. A trial as such would've been a spectacle, hundreds- no, thousands- would've turned up to watch. Meaning thousands of people knew what had been spoken. In turn meaning everyone in the capital knew that there was a son of a Crowned Prince making a claim for the throne. He poured his third glass, already knowing that once he was in his room of the Tower of the Hand he would be deeper in his cups than he ever had before. Which in itself was saying something.
"Tell me everything about it. Don't fight me on it, I can't work on a solution unless I know everything."
Cersei clearly wanted to fight back but she did see sense in his words. Pouring herself a glass of wine and doing her best to look at anything other than him.
"That he did betray Robert, that he was plotting to depose my son, but not for himself. That it wasn't for a usurping reason. How disgusted he had felt as Elia's, Aegon's, and Rhaenys' bodies were presented in front of the Iron Throne and that Rhaegar did not commit the atrocities everyone thought. Of how he had found Lyanna dying in a bed of blood as she made him promise to protect her legitimate son. Of how Elia and Rhaegar annulled their marriage and he wed the Stark bitch-"
He choked on his wine. Coughing as he fought for air to fill his lungs. For someone who was dancing circles around him minutes before she most definitely wasn't doing so now. It shocked him. Not that he'd ever show it, but it did. If it were true then it meant the boy wasn't a bastard and he was trueborn. First in line for the throne. And both himself and Robb Stark had won every battle they had been in. He'd need to find proof of the claim, taking a note to ask around anyone who had been in the Red Keep when this was all happening.
"How did you know?"
"Father received a raven from Lord Leo Lefford. The troops who escaped after the siege was broken by the Northerner's were regrouping with reinforcements between the Golden Tooth and Oxcross. How they found out I have no idea but they decimated said army. Uncle Stafford is dead."
Clearly this hadn't reached her as her eyes widened. She'd been closest to Stafford out of them all, always telling her of how wilful Joanna Lannister had been and coddling her as a result.
"That means-"
"That our home Kingdom is blocked on all sides? Aye, it does. Unless you want to ally with the Greyjoy's that is."
She scoffed at the idea. Even though he had toyed with it on the journey down the closer he had gotten the more he concluded it would be one of the worst moves they could make. At least there was two more routes he could explore but he'd need to think on it.
"Not only this, Lady Alysanne swears she saw a silver dragon above the battlefield. That portion I doubt, but needless to say, we are fucked."