«Friday, December 3rd 2004»

«Dear diary,

December has arrived. I haven't decorated the house yet, but I'm planning to next week. You see, we're still shooting the movie.

If I had nothing specific to write to you I would just write how I spent my day, as I did in middle school. There is, however, and it has to do about Light. Again.

Remember when I told you he's been acting weird lately, and that my feelings get stronger for him for no reason? There's finally an explanation for that!

Yesterday when I returned home from work, I drank some of the glass of water I had left there last night. But then, I started feeling dizzy for no reason. And as if there was a movie in my head, I started seeing my life passing through my mind.

I saw when I first got in my hands the death note, I saw the cassettes I sent to Sakura TV to be in contact with Kira, I saw when I met Light for the first time... When he gave me that kiss... Everything... Everything has to do with the death note. My moments with Light, my moments with L, the Kira task force team, the shinigamis... Anything you can imagine. For fractions of a second, I had lost my voice. I couldn't utter a word. The room around me darkened and my head bumped hard on the floor. Apparently, I was in a state of intense emotion as I couldn't control my thoughts and myself, so I lost my consciousness.

In the end, I woke up on the couch. I still had a slight dizziness. In front of me were Rem, another shinigami named Sidoh, and a blond little girl. It felt familiar seeing my old shinigami friend.They told me some things that I couldn't believe I heard. If it was April 1st I'd thought they're fooling me around.

You see, there's a shinigami rule that even Rem didn't know about it. If both persons possessing death notes interact with each other, but the first person has a lifespan under 780 days, then the second person will start hallucinating that they have lost their memories about death note, while they haven't. It's just a hallucination. And in order for Rem to bring back my memories, she had to use my own death note, since Light had taken it, so she asked Sidoh's help.

That's when Sidoh told her about a potion called "Delusional Potion" where it's used for this specific rule. In other words, my memories had to return only if I drank the potion, and touching my death note at the same time.

Eventually, they made it. They made it with the help of this girl from England who has the shinigami eyes, even though she hasn't made the deal with some shinigami. They almost burned a public property, but somehow they succeeded. Luck seems to have been on their side.Soon after, they sneaked into my house before I got home from work and Sidoh dripped a little of the potion into a glass of water. He waited with Tina in the bedroom while Rem was holding the notebook in her hands. So, when I got home the prescribed procedure followed.

They helped me remember some key events that happened recently, such as that Light and I would be executed in court, or that Matsuda used his gun to reduce our strength. But that's not what surprised me. What made me astonished was what this emo detective did for me. He... Saved me. I still can't believe I'm writing these three words... L saved me. He truly did! That weird pervert saved me!!

According to Rem, he was all alone among the cells until Matsuda came to announce to him what the judge told him to do. Once Matsuda pulled off his gun, L ran in front of me to protect my body and the policeman lost his target, so he accidentally shot L. Because of that, he had to be taken to the hospital in which he stayed for two days, as his injury according to the doctors wasn't life-threatening. In the meantime, Rem was at Light's service.

After they finished their story, they started explaining L's actions towards me. At first, I thought how L is a caring and loyal friend. But then Tina got straight to the point: That L did this because he loves me romantically and not because he's a loyal friend. I told them L is stupid and he certainly doesn't know I love Light, or that I'm going to marry him. And that's when I was proved wrong. I remember exactly what Sidoh said: "Don't think about wedding stuff, kid. The love of your life is probably going out with another girl"

I didn't believe him, so I wanted to document his statement. Rem suggested taking me to Takada's house, which I didn't know who she was until now. So... I accepted.By and large, we arrived at the apartment. It was so big and imposing, that thought some celebrity could live here. On the other hand, I was told that Light could be hanging out with another woman, so I felt nervous about what Rem is going to show me through the balcony. Unfortunately, they were right... Light was on the bed with this woman called "Takada"

To be honest with you, I don't want to write about what followed. I don't think I can continue writing... I'll tell you just one thing: As soon as they realized my presence, I took a flower pot and threw it on the glass. I think from this and only you understand why the whole thing didn't go well...And here am I now. I still don't know how to feel about that...It can't be true! Light would never do that! He's Kira, but that doesn't stop him from loving someone romantically! We're in a relationship for a year! I think it's time to ask him to a wedding! I didn't see that! No, no I didn't! I'm dreaming, I'm just dreaming! If I pinch myself I'll wake up on my bed, and Light will be dressed up as a groom!

It's not a dream... I'm not dreaming... Fuck!»

---

The young actress kept staring at the paper wondering if she should continue writing or not. She hated the words she wrote. She hated the reality she saw in those words. She always thought of those events as fictional stories. The fictional stories she watches in the cinema or reads them in novels. She was just an observer and therefore, she was having fun. But how is it possible for her to suddenly be in the position of the protagonist?

She closed the notebook and put it on the desk shelf. She thought she'd forget about it if she distracted her mind with something else, so she opened the TV. Like she wrote in her diary, it was just a realistic dream. These dreams are common. The dreamer believes that the events they see happen in the real life, and they end up waking up on their bed. That's it. It's not real! She was sure Light will be her future husband and she'll be his wife. The wife of the God of the new world.

As she zapped through the TV channels, her attention was grabbed by one of these shows that present cheap entertainment to the world. The show was called "Free love" and had to do with various young women who were bored of being single, and wanted to find a new match through the show. In each round, a new man came out, and through various questions about the girls, he chose which girl should he take. Although Misa wasn't used to watching such shows, she decided to watch out of curiosity. What could happen? It was just a show.

«Good evening, our dear viewers!!» The presenter greeted. «As you can see we are in Christmas vibes. There's the Christmas tree we have decorated, the confetti, everything shows that Christmas is coming! No one should be left alone in life, so that's why we bring love closer through our show! We provide our services to people who are willing to find true love and make their own love story!»

«Well, dear friends, we have five women of different ages with us, who if they are lucky enough, will find the love of their lives tonight! We have Yoko, 17 years old from Shibuya, Honoka, 25 years old from Akihabara, Sachiko, 28 years old, from Shinjuku, Rin, 35 years old, from Roppongi and Nozomi, 43 years old, from the prefecture of Nagano! Let's welcome our guests!!»

The show was followed by a young man named Daisuke which his last name was Yagami too.

What a coincidence! Misa thought. They can't be relatives. It's a very common surname.

The knot in her throat was intense. Pulsing like a heartbeat while the tears filled her eyelids. She swallowed so her voice wouldn't sound like it's breaking. Her eyes were tightly closed trying to get rid of the tears. She wouldn't act this way! Anyone could be in her position. The failure of a relationship is not uncommon. So why let herself cry? She wouldn't cry! She's not a crybaby! She cried over the death of her family. She mourned for them. So why start mourning for something so common among girls in her age?

She continued to watch while zapping. Maybe she was upset that this young man had the same surname as Light. Though she didn't think too much about it. She eventually decided to watch a movie. Usually, at that time some channels show comedies. She always loved comedies anyway. Why should she waste her time watching something that will irritate her?

Eventually, she spotted one of her favourite comedy movies she used to watch when she was a child. It was a piece of luck! There's finally something that would brighten up her day!

**

An hour and a half passed since the movie started, and it finally got to Misa's favourite spot where the protagonist finds out that her husband is secretly marrying another woman, and decides to go to their wedding. This scene always made Misa laugh, no matter how sad or frustrated she was. She always laughed to tears with every scene of this film. Comedies films in general were like medicine to her.

«What are you talking about? Teppei had always been loyal to me! We had three children together. I can tell he wanted to make a family!» The protagonist said to her cousin.

«I don't mean to offend you, dear Ebina, but you are slightly stupid. Your husband is going to marry your classmate Takada, and you absolutely know nothing about it!»

«He's going what?!»

«Their wedding is tomorrow at five a.m.»

«That's way too early!»

«Yeah, they wanted to be sure they'll catch the flight at one o'clock in the evening. They're going to New York»

«Takada... That homewrecker!! I'll kill her!»

«No cousin no! Don't do that! She'll go to the ground, and you'll go to prison! Don't even think about it! You should just discuss it politely with her!»

Although it was her favourite moment, this time she wasn't laughing. She didn't feel the need to laugh. As if her "medicine" didn't work this time. Not a single smile formed on her face. Nothing came out. Nothing to express joy. Her eyes felt burnt with tears. Thick tears rolled down her cheeks. Seeing that the movie didn't help either, she eventually turned off the TV.

"You're such a liar, Misa! You're a liar! You promised you wouldn't cry..." She monologued.

It was a strange feeling. As if someone had uprooted her heart. She couldn't bear the weight in her chest. It hurt. It hurt a lot! Her moments with Light passed through her mind like lightning. Like yesterday where she regained her memories. She saw all of them passing through her mind, like a bullet train. The more she remembered, the more it hurt.

I'll try my hardest to make you love me. I promise!

"Why did I say that?! Why did I say that?! Why did I even bother to look for him, why?!" She shouted as she hit the wall with the right side of her fist.

Exactly one year ago, my parents were killed in a robbery. I was home with them at the time. It happened right in front of me. I wanted that man to pay for what he did... But the trial dragged on forever.

"Why didn't I get it from the start?! It should be obvious he'd manipulate me! Why didn't I get it?!" She sobbed holding her head in despair.

"Mom, why did you give birth to me?! Why am I suffering?! What have I done? What have I done for God to be punishing me like that?!" She pulled furiously the sofa cover ready to tear it up. She saw her tears felling on it, as her sobs became louder.

"I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!!" She covered her face in the pillows of the sofa. Some of them were torn up by her intense reaction. Her eyes, along with her cheeks, had taken a reddish hue like the rose colour. Her heartbeat had speeded up, though she couldn't feel it. Her efforts to escape the torment of nostalgia and remembrance were in vain. She tried to convince herself that she would succeed, that she would win her mind, and yet it happened what she was feared of... She broke out in such a violent way... If Light was standing in front of her, how would he react? Certainly not with the tenderness and patience as Misa had expected. How could she have such expectations from a serial killer? The youth didn't allow her to see his true side. How would it? Love had occupied her mind anyway.

Love? What love? She didn't love him. She never did. Her mind and heart just wanted to find solace after the death of her parents. She wanted to feel that she is not alone in this world without companionship, thus creating this illusion.

"Let me start over!! Please, let me start over! Let me go back to when everything went wrong!! If only I had never met him... If only I had never met him! Just... Let him choke in his own vomit!" She uttered the last sentence in sobs while tearing up another pillow.

"Very well then! If you want to be with this slut, you can have her! But if you dare to talk to me again..."

She grabbed the jar that was on the table of the dining room, as she had no other power to tear the pillows up.

"I'll have to kill you both!" She finished her phrase by throwing the jar on the wall. The sound of the breaking glass was heard upstairs. Someone came out of their apartment and shouted at her:

"Shut the fuck up, you moron! Everyone falls in love but doesn't act like that! Just sit there and accept it!"

She didn't react. She sat in silence looking at the mess she had made. Her mouth was dry as she had lost a lot of salt from the intense crying.

She didn't bother to break or tear up something else. She walked slowly to the couch and lay down on the few pillows she hadn't tear up. Her thoughts were still scattered. She should be proud to have such a good friend who is by her side, even though she's not a human. She once was, and therefore knows how much it hurts to be a human. To hurt, to feel joy, to laugh, to be angry, all these human feelings. It's just the nature of man. And the fact that Rem was a female made her even more empathetic. She went through all this trouble for Misa, though she was not alone. She also had her company that helped to the young woman's redemption.

Despite the words she uttered aloud, deep inside she knew what she really needed to do. To respect herself and finally get out of this relationship that gains nothing from it. And she understood... She understood that she had to do it from the very beginning. As much as it hurt her heart, she had to do it for her own sake.

The actress hoped to calm down after that breakdown but instead, she cried for another twenty minutes until she fell asleep. Redemption hurts. It hurts a lot!

--

--Meanwhile yesterday, someone was looking in the kitchen for pieces of ice to put on the bruises. He hadn't hurt himself by stumbling. He had been attacked by his mistress because she had just learned that her boyfriend was partner swiping. She finally left home and went to stay with a friend for a while. The young man sat putting the ice on a cloth over the bruises.

A black creature appeared in front of him. A creepy creature that felt so familiar to him. He heard his characteristic laughter.

"Well, well, well... Things don't seem to work out, right Light?"

"Indeed... I had some misunderstandings with Takada and Misa, but that doesn't affect my work as Kira. Such things are common"

"I didn't say they're not common. I'm just saying your love life ended abruptly"

"Do you know the reason why? It's Rem's fault! She came with Misa and showed her what I was doing with Takada in privacy" Light explained.

"Oh yeah! I remember when Rem told me the other day. That she wants Misa to break up with you"

"So, it was planned in advance then..."

Ryuk kept laughing out loudly. If he said all these to the other shinigamis it would become the joke of the year. He was actually planning to tell them.

"How shocked and hurt the girls must feel! Hahahahaha!! Humans are so worth watching, though shinigamis are interesting too!"

"Why do they feel hurt? What have I done to them? I just wanted to weigh their pros and cons until I decide which one I'll marry in the end. They're just women, you know. They're always whining and act exaggeratedly"

"Haaahahahahahahaha!! That's Light I remember!"

"Why is it so funny, Ryuk?" Light asked who hadn't recovered yet from dizziness.

The shinigami didn't answer. He looked at the mortal in the eyes and smiled, showing him his pointed teeth.

"I want you to know something about me, Light. I would never lie to anyone let alone when it comes to entertainment. But as you already know, I never think based on what's right and wrong. I gave you my death note and all this stuff happened, simply because I was bored"

Light realized he was going to hear something that would probably affect him in his work. He turned and looked at the deadly creature with interest.

"What did L do again?"

"Nothing at the moment. I don't know actually. What I know and want to tell you is that I saw a man in a black coat observing Takada's house. Couldn't see his face though"

"What else was he doing?"

"He took a photo of it and went to the next building"

Light once again started concentrating. Based on his current situation, the first thing that came to his mind was that person was from the Kira task force. He could be an FBI agent too. No. How they could possibly know he's at Takada's house? When she leaves her house, he always makeups himself precautionarily, so that no policeman will recognize him. Unless he was a stranger who just liked the architecture of the house. But he was wearing... A coat? Certainly, the weather was wintery but it wasn't that cold.

"How long ago did you see him?"

"Just before I appear in front of you"

The teenager thought for a while. He eventually got up and went straight to the balcony. He indeed saw in the corner of the next-door house a man in a black coat with his back turned. His instinct told him his work as Kira was in immediate danger. But for some reason, he couldn't understand whether what he was feeling was instinct or fear. However, he didn't want to risk it, so he went to the bathroom to look for the cosmetics he had bought. He didn't like this nonsense he did, but it was the most convenient way.

"Aren't those stuff women put to look more beautiful? Why do you have such things?"

"In the situation I am in, I have to be cautious with everyone. I don't want to risk it if anyone recognizes me out. I know that the lawsuit has been cancelled, but I have my suspicions. Before it takes place, there was a journalist who had been informed about the lawsuit and took a picture of me. I'm still not sure, but still..."

"Humans are indeed interesting..." Ryuk murmured.

The other man put a special cream around his eyes that made his face look old and added face powder on his cheeks. As for the mouth, it was covered by a medical mask.

"You're unrecognizable, Light! You could also change your voice to be fully covered!"

"Indeed. With these cosmetics, I learned how to change the features of my face. Maybe I'll be a make-up artist in the future"

When they got out together, the unknown man was ready to leave, after making a circle around Takada's house and observing it well. Fortunately for Light, he got him on time.

"Excuse me, sir. Do you need some help?"

The mysterious man turned and looked at him. He was wearing dark blue glasses along with his big hat. Light certainly couldn't find out who he was. The man bowed as a greeting.

"Good evening sir. Please excuse my creepy appearance. I look like a ghost, right?"

"Not at all"

He took his police ID out of his coat pocket revealing himself to the other man.

"I'm Hideaki Suruga. An FBI agent"

"I see... What brings you here?"

"I'm working upon the Kira case. I don't know if you have heard anything, but Kira would be executed on the court and managed to run away last minute"

"Oh, well... I don't watch TV that much. I didn't know about it, to be honest"

"Yes, and I came here because I suspect he might be hiding in this neighbourhood. I mean... Not only me. ICPO sent me"

Light felt cold sweat running down his spine. However, he kept portraying his role.

"Jesus Christ... Does that mean he's hiding somewhere? It's my neighbourhood! I have children to raise!"

The agent put his hand on Light's shoulder to show support.

"Please sir, don't worry. It's just a suspicion. We may be proven wrong in the end. Don't be afraid...I assure you Kira will soon be sentenced to death! There is no way he can't be brought to justice!"

Keep dreaming man! He thought faking a smile.

"I actually wanted to ask you something. It may be my imagination, but..."

"Of course, tell me"

"I think I saw you taking pictures of my house. I was behind the door balcony and I saw a person dressed in black"

"Yes, that was me. I take photos of the buildings so that when we catch him, I'll give the photo to the police and they search his house. And because I can't guess where or what his house looks like, I take pictures whole of the neighbourhood"

"What about the addresses?"

"The neighbourhood in the lower street does have addresses. This is an area in which there are minimal home addresses"

Light's heart was pounding although he had no reason to be afraid. He had excellent acting skills, even though he wasn't an actor. He could easily fool an FBI agent. He did the same with Raye Penber and Naomi Misora. Why it should be difficult with Suruga? If he asked him to enter Takada's house he would find no notebooks. Misa took back hers during her fight with Takada, and he hid his own in the attic. Also, his makeup made him look 30 years older. There was absolutely no reason for him to be concerned.

"May I take a look inside your house?"

"I give you my permission. I have nothing to hide"

"Splendid!" The agent said and smiled.

He walked towards the building and entered the elevator since Takada's apartment was on the sixth floor. Light followed him always keeping in mind his next move.

He seems too willing as if heactuallyhas nothing to hide. He's acting normal though. His behaviour doesn't give you the impression he wants to be convincing. But he gives you a strange feeling like his aura creeps you out. You just feel something's wrong with him. Keep being an actor, boy. I already know who are you!The agent thought as he walked inside the apartment.

Light on the other hand, wasn't worried about the reasons mentioned above. His work as Kira wasn't endangered. It was just his own fears. Suruga would search the house and find nothing in the end. It was completely safe. For now at least. Nor did he care about the break up of his relationship with the two women. All he cared about was escaping first from L and the court, and then restoring Kira's reputation. To spread the message to the world that he is a hero and not a murderer.

Ten minutes passed since he started searching in the house and Light started wondering what the agent is doing. To break the ice he asked if he wanted to treat him some lunch. Suruga politely declined.

"You don't need to treat me. I'll be the first to treat. If you want, we can go to my favourite café"

"Oh, really? Where is it?"

He took the handcuffs straight out of his coat pocket and put them on the other man's wrists. An unexpected move for Light.

"In the Kira headquarters. We'll discuss the rest in my car. And don't try to protest because there is proof! You can't pretend to be innocent anymore!"

"Huh?"

"You're under arrest, Kira. Again!"