I need to eat... But I'm in the zone and honestly, I'm probably going to go through withdrawal if fast food really does shut down because of this Coronavirus. BUT I suppose I'm getting some writing in before I go back to work tomorrow :)

Be safe! No Crowds! WASH HANDS!

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What I've Done

Chapter 6

I sit on my 'bed' at home, eyes closed to block out the obnoxiously bright colors that hurt my head. Just about everything in this room was mine when I was a child. It seems like Inko kept everything from before I was saved—which basically means I'm surrounded by hero ideology and All Might memorabilia in particular. Tomura would have a field day if he walked in here.

Thinking of him is difficult for me to do now though. It's been ten days since I last saw him—that's ten days longer than I've ever gone without being in his presence. The first few weren't so bad because I was doped up on Morphine or sleeping off the side effects of having my injuries healed. But once I was lucid again and Inko started lobbying for my return to her custody, I became dishearteningly aware of how empty I felt without him.

"'Zuku?" I hear, almost cringing at the nickname. "May I come in sweetheart?"

I quickly pull my head back up when the door starts to creak open and let a small smile spread across my lips as I say 'yes'. She always looks so relieved when I do that… It's actually a little sad but I choose to ignore that.

"Do you like your room?"

"NO." is my immediate thought. I hate heroes and I hate All Might the most. Lying is not one of my strong suits and I certainly was never stupid enough to do so with Master or Tomura but they said I have a naturally innocent face and could pull it off if I tried hard enough. As long as 'dad' isn't around, I think I can manage.

"You kept all my things…" I respond, forcing my smile to widen as I dodge a real answer.

Another gentle knock resounds on my opened door and I immediately feel tense; if Naomasa heard me, he might have been able to tell that I wasn't being entirely honest. His expression doesn't suggest that I've been caught, but, maybe he has an innocent face too.

He wraps his arm around Inko's side and runs his thumb up and down, the two grinning at each other happily before turning their attention back to me. "Your appointment with your therapist is in an hour and your mother and I were thinking that we could go get some lunch afterward. How about Katsudon? I've heard it's your favorite."

"Okay…" I agree, not particularly caring to do this 'family outing' but not seeing any way to successfully decline without causing suspicion. I just hope my therapist doesn't have a quirk like Naomasa's.

~Flashback~

"Okay, Deku, now pay attention," Tomura states as he pushes a stack of books towards me. "When Master's plan is set in motion and you're sent out to reassimilate, everyone is going to tell you that you were being held prisoner... That Master and I are evil and that we hurt you just because we could."

Though it doesn't appear on my face, I'm frowning internally at the absurdity. He nods as if he can sense my disagreement and continues, laying the various books out for me to see.

"You're going to have to pretend to believe them, Deku, and it can't happen overnight. Master and our medical contacts determined these would be the best guides to help you learn what you need to do to convince everyone you come in contact with that you're healing or something stupid like that."

"I understand, Tomura," I reply, readying myself for the hundreds of pages worth of information I need to memorize. He grabs my chin, however, and pulls it up until I hesitantly make eye contact with him.

"Our entire operation is relying on you, Deku," Tomura states lowly. "Master and I will work on our end to help you get into the UA hero course without a quirk, but your actions between being 'rescued' and applying are critical. Don't fail."

My chest throbs from the very idea of displeasing him and I swallow thickly before responding. "I will be a perfect student and convince everyone that my dream is to be a hero... I won't disappoint you, Tomura."

~End Flashback~

I rerun my conversation with Tomura over and over in my head, trying to reinvigorate the confidence I felt when I swore to hold up my end of the plan. But as the second week in Inko and Naomasa's home comes to an end, I can't help but start to worry.

Despite my stringent adherence to the carefully planned process of 'healing from trauma', Inko shows no sign of acknowledgment. She treats me like I'm desperately wounded and in need of constant attention; how will she react when I bring up UA?

Being a hero is arguably one of the most dangerous professions in the world and seeing as she almost barges into the bathroom to make sure I haven't drowned while taking a shower… well, I can't see her accepting me going to UA for any reason at this point. "It's only been a couple of weeks... Tomura said this wouldn't happen overnight; I just have to be patient, that's all."

"Izuku, honey?"

My eyes snap to the door of my room as Inko's increasingly annoying voice rips me from my thoughts. What could she possibly want now? It's only been twenty minutes since she last came to check on me.

"Yes, mom?" I respond gently, hiding the irritation that's threatening to overtake my tongue. My eyes widen, however, when I see purple hair peeking out from behind her. "Shinso?"

"Hey, Midoriya…" he drawls, giving me a short wave while stepping more into view. I can see a backpack over his shoulder and Inko has this… look. She's almost vibrating with what I believe is excitement as she twists slightly and grabs Shinso's arm, practically dragging him into my room.

"We're going to have a sleepover party!"

Poor Shinso looks as pained as I feel from Inko's declaration and as I look past him, I can see Naomasa and Aizawa sweat dropping behind them. This is clearly not something that I can get out of just like everything else my 'mother' insists that we do together.

"How about we let young Hitoshi get his things settled while we start dinner?" Naomasa offers after a somewhat awkward period of silence from the rest of us—one that Inko either didn't notice or chose to ignore—and her face sparkles even more. Within moments she's practically sprinting to the kitchen and I'm soon left with just Shinso.

"Sorry about this…" he states tiredly. "Dad has been going on assignments outside of the city lately and somehow he and your dad got it in their heads that instead of me just chilling at home, us hanging out would be good for the both of us."

"Oh…" I hum, "okay…"

From the few minutes I spent with Shinso while I was in the hospital, I know that I don't particularly mind being around him, but still… A sleepover? Every moment spent with another person is one that divides my attention from formulating a plan that will make Tomura proud of me.

"Heh…" Shinso laughs, rolling his eyes in a way that makes me think he's agreeing with my subdued lack of excitement. "Yeah…"

~Time-Skip: 1 Month~

I'd hoped that if I gave it some time, Inko and Naomasa's fanatic need to be near me would where off, but I swear these two literally cannot leave me alone. If one isn't pestering me about something, then the other is—it's like they take turns trying to suffocate me. At my real home, I spent approximately 17.5 hours of every single day alone and out of the 6.5 that I was with someone, four of those were spent doing training.

Inko and Naomasa, however, insist on chatting with me constantly during the day and peek in my room at least once an hour every night. It makes me even more desperate to see Tomura and just be. Sure, he'd often talk if he was rewarding me with his presence, but I wasn't expected to actually converse. At most I'd ask a question here or there or maybe agree with something he'd say while he pet my hair and told me about his dreams for the future. That's all I want right now, which is even worse because I'm not supposed to want.

The psychologist I see is yet another example of how noisy 'real-life' is. The rather dopey old man is nice enough, but he wants to talk about my 'feelings' which I don't actually have all while making me play with action figures. I'm thirteen, not three. Still, seeing him has its benefits… With a little manipulation, I actually managed to convince him to tell Inko that I NEED to get out of the house and start school this coming year.

The only reprieve I have from them until then is Shinso. The 'sleepover parties' that I'd initially been against are now the nights that I look forward to. Tonight is one of those nights and honestly, thank heavens.

It's such a relief because Inko will go into this 'hostess' mode and spend hours making food that we'll never finish and Shinso tends to just read and let me sit quietly. Silence is indeed a virtue and one that he understands and appreciates just as I do.

"Dinner will be ready in about thirty minutes, boys!" Inko states cheerily after knocking on my bedroom door. "I hope you're hungry! We'll watch some movies and play games right after!"

"I'm probably going to sound like an ass, but your mom is a lot to handle." Shinso somewhat mumbles when she rushes off to deal with a timer dinging. "My dad is the exact opposite of her and I thought I wanted a doting parent growing up… but damn."

His lazy purple eyes trail up to me as if searching for some sign that he should apologize, but he's entirely correct. Maybe it's because I'm feeling particularly overstimulated this week, but I feel the urge to express my own dissatisfaction with her behavior.

"She leaves me alone when you're here. Usually, she spends an average of thirty-five minutes of every hour with me 'making up for lost time'."

"Oh shit," he chuckles, his eyes widening in amusement filled exasperation. "You and I haven't really talked all that much, but I got the feeling the first time we met that you prefer to be left alone the majority of the time. How do you deal with that?"

I deal with it because I have to—because it's part of the persona I need to create and maintain for my mission to succeed. But I can't tell Shinso that, so I just stay quiet, thumbing at one of the scars on my wrist out of habit.

"Do those hurt still?" he asks when I don't answer, the tone of his voice shifting lower and heavier.

"Sometimes..." I reply as I look down at my marred skin. Shinso is quiet for some time after that, but he isn't reading his book or playing some game on his phone like he usually does. He appears to be deep in thought, brows furrowing slightly while he stares at my wrist.

"My mom was a hero too." He eventually states, though his eyes are still glued in the same position. "I remember hearing her talking to your dad a lot when I was younger; he'd come by with papers or she'd have some for him."

Anything nonverbal is going to be difficult for me to pick up on and conversations are not part of my skill set, but I'm already on edge despite not knowing where this conversation is headed—I can guess, but, I truly hope I'm wrong.

"They were looking for you."

Fuck. Even someone as socially inept as me can tell from his verb tense that she's probably dead and it's probably because of her involvement in my case. I don't like heroes at all, but Shinso is so kind and understanding… How could his mother have been different?

"She was murdered when I was six, but they wouldn't let me see her afterward. It made me so angry... my mom was gone and I didn't even get to see her one last time," he explains with an edge of frustration to his voice.

I watch him hunch over slightly and support his weight by placing his forearms on his knees and I swear the exhaustion in his face deepens. Though I desperately want to say something I can't-I wouldn't know what to say even if I could.

Shinso swallows thickly and takes a deep breath, running his eyes over my exposed skin. They stop every so often and I come to the unnerving realization that each time they did, it was on a scar I'd received from Tomura's quirk.

"Years later I brainwashed an officer into giving me her murder file and..." he starts, his voice choking slightly, "... and I wish I'd just listened to dad when he told me that I didn't need to remember her like that. My first thought when I think of her now is the crime scene photos... of her mangled, partially disintegrated corpse."

Shinso falls quiet again, his body shaking as he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. There's a strange and horrendously uncomfortable ball in my throat that only seems to grow as the silence stretches between us. Tomura killed Shinso's mom because she was trying to take me away from him… I know he wouldn't have done it if he didn't have to, but still… She's gone and for some reason, I feel responsible.

"No," I conclude, "I am responsible."

"I don't blame you, Izuku."

Before I can even process my actions, my eyes are shooting up to look at him directly for the first time. His eyes are reddened and glassy but he holds my gaze until I realize that I've broken one of Tomura's rules and drop my head back to where it had been, wondering how appropriate it would be to ask him why the hell not.

"Abduction cases were her specialty…" he continues, a proud and nostalgic thrum returning to his previously downcast voice. "I think it's because she couldn't stand the idea of someone being lost, alone, and likely being hurt. While I'm sad she's gone, those marks on you are proof that what she was doing was noble. I'm going to go to UA and become a hero just like her one day."

"I…" I attempt, almost gulping to get rid of the distress I'm struggling to hide. "I want to go there too… To UA I mean…"

That hadn't been what I'd intended to say, but Shinso relaxes some and graces me with a sad yet wondrously content smile. "I know mom would be so happy to hear that…"

Maybe having Shinso over isn't such a reprieve after all.

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Lol aaaaand... ANOTHER GUT PUNCH! :) You know I can't help myself! If you do need a 'pick me up' chapter, I suggest checking out the latest update to 'Learn To Breathe'... it's on a happy note *For Now*

Comments/Reviews are greatly appreciated!