Honestly, is sorry even enough? For those of you that it is, SORRY FOR TAKING SO FUCKING LONG TO UPDATE. For those of you that it isn't enough for... well, still sorry but that's all I got bruh. Life kicked my ass to the ground and then dug a hole to throw me in. HOWEVER, I am not giving up and will be updating all my MHA stories asap!

Thank you to everyone who came back to read after all this time!

Warnings: This chapter has violence! If there is another warning you think I should add, LMK.

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What I've Done

Chapter 16

*Midoriya POV*

After leaving Bakugo at the beach, I somewhat wander around since I have at least an hour before I'm expected back at Inko's house. In all honesty, I'm conflicted about sneaking off once he'd fallen asleep. I'm ashamed of myself for letting him get in my head at all, but Kacchan has been so kind.

"No," I mutter, shaking my head in disgust. "He's not Kacchan to me, he's Bakugo and he's just trying to trick me. Maybe he even thinks he's being genuine and is lying to himself about who he truly is…"

My fingers wiggle at my sides while I argue with myself, the heat from Bakugo's hand still lingering there along with the phantom sensation of his calloused skin. If I could just be with Tomura again this wouldn't be such a problem!

As if my thoughts summoned him, I feel a rough grip on the back of my neck, the icy hold causing needling bumps to rush across my body. By the pressure alone, I know Tomura has finally reached the end of his patience with my misbehavior; he's furious. This isn't at all the type of attention I wanted to earn from him, but I can't take back what I've done. Maybe if I'm strong and obedient during the punishment he will forgive me...

That's easier thought than done though. As Tomura pulls me through the portal his fingers had sprouted from, my anxiety starts rising rapidly. He wastes no time in shoving me forward, maneuvering me through the dark halls of our shared home. Each step causes the desire to whimper and beg for mercy to grow and by the time I see the door to Tomura's 'playroom' I feel faint, my feet quickly becoming uncoordinated.

His bruising grip tightens further to compensate for my fear-induced disorientation, a growl slipping from his sneered lips as a final warning not to provoke him further. I try to suck in a breath to comply, but it only serves to prove how much more training and discipline I need to be an ideal pet. My lungs choke on the stale air, the resulting sound pitiful.

"Don't you try and manipulate me! You're not going to whimper your way out of this, Deku. This is the only way you're going to learn; I'm doing this for you—for us!" Tomura hisses coldly.

Usually, I'm supposed to respond when I've been directly spoken too but when he's like this anything I say will add gas to the fire; the best thing I can do right now is to submit to whatever punishment he believes is appropriate for my transgressions.

"You know what to do," Tomura states hotly, kicking me roughly in the back.

The lump in my throat is hard to swallow, but I will myself to comply and get to my knees. As I begin stripping down to my boxers, it almost seems like my scars are even more visible than they were before, my disfigured skin sticky and pale. Tomura's eyes are trained on me as I tremble, the metal cuffs I'm supposed to put on my wrists and ankles jingling in the most foreboding way.

"I want you hanging tonight, Deku," he instructs when the final lock clicks, nodding to a hook dangling from the ceiling before kicking a cinder block in my direction. "Get up there. Now."

With a disjointed nod, I obediently step up and throw the chain connecting my handcuffs into the curved metal, keeping my wince minimal when he immediately steps forward and kicks my footing out from under me.

Perhaps it's because I've not received a punishment like this since leaving the hideout, but I could swear the strain in my shoulders and wrists is worse now than it used to be; if that's the case then I'm going to really struggle to be good for Tomura when the true pain starts. He steps away to pick out whatever 'toy' he plans on using for my lesson tonight and I decide it's time to mentally check out.

The haunting sounds of his rummaging fade away then and I focus on memories of better times… of the sporadic instances when Tomura showed me how much he cares in gentler ways. Somehow though, softer red eyes find their way into my dream world along with a hushed gravelly voice and warmth that seeps through even my thickest clothes.

I don't fight the intrusion like I normally would though… It doesn't matter what gets me through the torment I'm about to suffer so long as I can do it. Tomura is counting on me to be perfect, and this is what it's going to take.

The pain starts.

~0.0~

Tomura draws the metal pipe he's been beating me with back once more before batting it into my already destroyed ribs. Blood spews from my lips and paints Tomura's face and shirt, though I think he finds it more exciting than irritating; he's like a child clubbing a piñata, and the shrieks, wails, and blood coming out of me is his favorite candy.

It's difficult to breathe; the bones in my legs, arms, and chest have all been broken, some likely shattered entirely. Though I can't be certain, I believe my lungs have sustained damage as well if the fluid bubbling up my windpipe is any indication. Sweat runs in streams down my body, dripping from my nose as my head hangs from fatigue and agony. My dissociation is failing; I can't get my mind far enough away to block out this torment no matter how hard I try.

With a spine-tingling laugh, Tomura tosses his weapon away carelessly and approaches me again. The hook he'd told me to go to isn't far off the ground and with my arms dislocated I'm at just the right height for my forehead to rest on his shoulder. He gets so close to me, pressing our bodies together so that my chest nudges against him every time I attempt to take a saturated breath.

I'd usually be happy and comforted by being this close to him. But I'm still not through being reprimanded and am wary of the way he wraps his arms around me, threateningly dragging his fingers up and down my blackened back and sides while squeezing me to him. Another pitiful attempt at an apology reverberates up my strained vocal cords, incoherently begging him not to use his quirk on me tonight even though I have little doubt that he will; I know I've behaved unforgivingly and deserve everything being done.

Tomura laughs at my fear as he ducks down, pressing his forehead against mine before using the friction between our skin to lift my head up slightly, our noses brushing against each other to the point I can feel his breath against my red-stained lips.

"What is it going to take to make you understand, Deku? I've done everything for you... treated you so well and made sure you were safe from a life that would have treated you so cruelly. And this is how you act in return? Don't you know how much you're upsetting me?" He hisses, adding pressure to the gentle stroking motion he'd been doing with his fingertips until I throw my head back in a silent shriek. It's somewhat amazing how quickly and easily I forgot how excruciating punishments could be. The increasingly rough treatment is almost more than I can stand and somehow, I manage to make audible whimpers and hiccups despite how shredded my vocal cords are.

"Master and I are going to destroy this world and build a new one and I want you by my side. You're supposed to be mine, Deku, but you aren't acting like it... Those bad influences are ruining you. Are you even sorry for how much you've hurt me these past months?" Tomura questions, his voice becoming even colder. "And don't lie because I'll know."

All I can manage in terms of a response is to slightly nod, the movement so small I wasn't sure he could even feel it. Would it really matter if he did though? I've told Tomura I'm sorry many times before and he always accuses me of being dishonest; he wholeheartedly believes that my faults are so ingrained that I have to be pushed to the brink of death in order to have clarity and remorse... I'm hurt but not to that extreme.

"I'm not sure I believe you." He states and even though I expected it, my weak crying intensifies. "But," he continues, the word alone stealing my breath. "I'll let you off with a warning just this once. Master says overall you're making progress and I just can't see it because I care about you so much that I'm missing the bigger picture."

This... This has never happened before. The entire purpose of my life is to be as strong and perfect as possible so that I can serve Tomura well; because of this, he's always been very diligent and heavy-handed about correcting my bad behavior.

My body crashes to the ground in a painful lump when Tomura unlocks one of my handcuffs, but I refuse to lay there wallowing when I've been treated so kindly. With what strength I have left, I jerk myself towards his feet, kissing his shoes and rubbing my face against them to show my appreciation.

"That's enough, Deku," he scolds, kicking at me with enough force to knock me to my back. "I may be going easy on you because you're doing your duties but that doesn't mean you aren't still in trouble for everything else. I better not see anything I don't like from now on. Got it?"

Nothing I'd endured this evening could cause me more pain and distress than his words are right now. I feel so guilty and ashamed of myself; Tomura must be hurting so badly and it's all my fault! This can't happen again. I won't let it. It takes all the energy I have left, but I manage to focus my eyes on Tomura's face. I hope he knows through this pitiful gesture that I'm truly sorry. Darkness pours into vision before I'm able to see how he reacts though, and I'm thrust into unconsciousness

*Bakugo POV*

My head falls against the wall of my shower, the hot water doing nothing to wash away the self-disgust and hatred I feel. When I knocked over that pile of junk earlier today, I hadn't thought anything of it… until I heard Izuku's voice apologizing to someone and turned around. He was just bowing there on his hands and knees, his head pressed into the ground like he was no better than the dirt beneath him.

But when I got over to him, he wouldn't look at me, wouldn't speak, wouldn't react, he just… It was like Izuku wasn't there anymore. I shudder from the memory and feel the urge to break down all over again; what could this 'Master Tomura' have done to him to cause such total detachment by just being startled?

"F-fuck… I'm so s-sorry…" I whisper to the bleach-white tiles, tears already spitefully forming in my bloodshot eyes.

In truth, there isn't any way for me to begin to imagine what he went through. The best that I can do is whimper out a pathetic excuse for an apology and that isn't good enough. For fucks sake, Izuku comforted me after I scared him. It's no wonder he wandered home alone after that…

"Katsuki! You've been in there for an hour!"

I blink as my mother's voice breaks through the rush of water by my ears. It's humiliating I don't even have the energy to shout back at her, but all I manage is to turn the shower off and nod silently to myself. She's still there after I slip on sweatpants and open the door, a knowing yet pained expression on her face.

"Inko called and said Izuku came back home without you…" she states calmly. "She also said that he looked even more withdrawn than usual and went to bed without eating or saying a word…"

My stomach lurches again; if I don't get a handle on my damn gut, I'll be too weak to protect Izuku as I promised. "Yeah…" I admit feebly. "I fucked up, but it won't happen again…"

"You've got to stop this, Katsuki." Mom sighs, following me as I bypass her to go to my room for a night of restless sleep. "No one, not even Izuku himself blames you for his abduction. You are not responsible for—"

"Inko blames me." I scoff halfheartedly, my voice lowering as regret burns even more deeply in my chest. "I blame me…"

There's silence behind me but I know mom is glaring daggers into my back, no doubt trying to control her own volatile temper as we both so often fail to do. I huff in frustration and sit down heavily on my bed, waiting for her to argue with me.

"If anyone is to blame, it's me."

My simmering irritation and self-pity come to a crashing halt at her words and the shame on her proud face when my head snaps back up. I don't know what else to do other than stare at her though, watching as she gazes sadly at the floor of my room. Why would it be her fault? She wasn't even there.

"Inko was looking for someone to blame when Izuku was taken, but all of that anger was misdirected towards you… I'm your mother, Katsuki, and the parent you most take after… I should have seen what was going on and corrected the problem, but I only saw what I wanted to see, just like Inko and everyone else who was old enough to have mature reasoning and didn't use it."

She pushes herself from where she'd leaned against my doorway, coming to kneel in front of me with solemn understanding. "Inko, your father, the teachers watching you, and especially me… all of us have to take responsibility for what happened, but you were only four years old Katsuki, and you have since learned from the mistakes we let you make."

She reaches up and drags me to the floor, pulling me into her chest so that she can hold me close like she has an innumerable amount of times since Izuku was taken. We stay that way for several minutes before she speaks, her voice soothing even though her words make me feel so conflicted.

"Izuku has been hurt so long and so deeply that he won't let down his guard around his own mother… he can't show Inko or anyone else even the slightest bit of true affection and yet he reached out to you, Katsuki. You're the only person in the world that can help him heal and you can't do that if you can't let go of your guilt and regret. Please, if you won't do it for me or yourself, then do it for him."

I still can't forgive myself for what I've done in the past and I'm not sure I'll ever be able to completely, but I'd do anything to atone for how I behaved all those years ago… To show Izuku that I love him more than anything in this fucked up world.

"Yeah…" I agree, swearing to myself that I'll do better if it means helping him. "Okay, mom; I'll try..."

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Again, apologies for not updating! I hope you enjoy the continuation!