Chapter Eleven:

The Big Opening Act: Mario's Mysteries Begins

No less than a mile and a half from the Showgrounds, Melony was tending to her pet axolotl Axol Jr. in her home in Mushroom City. The little salamander was comfortable in his pen, and his owner sprinkled some treats into the bowl that lay close by, ensuring that the little axolotl named after the late manga artist had plenty to eat tonight.

In a flash, Axol Jr. began to eat the pellets that Melony had poured in. And, for extra measure, she made sure to include some earthworms she'd found in the backyard. It was known that axolotls ate earthworms, and Melony gave Axol Jr. plenty of them now and then.

With her pet taken care of, the watermelon waifu stepped away, and sat down on the sofa to watch some TV. An episode of "My Hero Accademia" was playing tonight, and Melony was in quite the anime mood this week, and she needed that exposure to inspire her manga writing.

Axol consumed a lot of anime while writing manga when he was alive, and a manga artist needed inspiration. Anime inspired manga artists, and it fascinated a rising manga writer like Melony.

Right when the episode was getting into an action scene, the TV suddenly flashed a testcard with the words PUZZLEVISION on it, and turned to static. Melony sat forward, baffled by what had just happened. Lightning flashed outside, and an odd laugh filtered its way through the TV speakers.

"Huh?"

And moments later, a creepy-looking face filled the screen, smiling at Melony with a rainbow-teeth filled mouth, and it flashed the creepiest of smug facial expressions. The watermelon waifu let out a high-pitched scream, startled and terrified by the horror that had just materialized.

"Good evening, Ms. Melony..." Mr. Puzzles said in an eerie tone, "...I can see we're comfortable, but not for long AS YOU'RE OFFICIALLY A PUZZLEVISION PERFORMER! And it's showtiiiiiiiime..."

"Uh, can you go away?" Melony asked.

"Go away?" Mr. Puzzles laughed, "Oh, dear. Let me think about it for a second, mmmm? How about... I'M NOT TAKING NO FOR AN ANSWER TODAY!"

A gloved hand appeared, and grabbed Melony. The watermelon-turned human attempted to utilize her deity powers, but the tightening grip of Mr. Puzzles interfered with her concentration. Melony gasped, unable to break her captor's grip, and the TV man laughed with cruel laughter.

Just as he said, it was showtime!

Welcome to PUZZLEVISION, the greatest show in the world, where non-stop entertainment will be provided every Saturday, forever, by yours truly, Mr. Puzzles.

It is time for the first show.

Gather around, dear friends, and bring your kids. The first of PUZZLEVISION's productions is sure to be enticing, and bring back fond youthful memories, as we have a riff on a wonderful educational show about a man and his dog. Oh, who can forget that, and you're probably tearing up with joy as the memories return right now.

Yes, we give you: MARIO'S MYSTERIES, which is NOT a rip-off of Blue's Clues, and we did not harm the little dog or the plumber whose head will be... I'm getting ahead of myself. Let us begin, and welcome to Storybook W... I mean, SMG4 Coloring Book Land.

-Coloring Book Land-

MARIO'S MYSTERIES

Our show opens with a coloring book on the table, and we open it, revealing a page depicting a house on a hill. Now, we use this as a gateway into a near-imaginary world, and this is where the show begins as we visit the residence of SMG4...

SMG4 peaked out the window, seeing the kids approaching with the cameraman. The meme-loving host waved happily and said, "Hey out there! It's me, SMG4! Come on inside, lads, don't be shy! It's time for some fun!"

The door opened, and the young learning students entered the house with the show's cameraman, and were greeted to the scene of a colorful living room where a photo depicting Super Mario's head hung on the wall to the right side of a couch. SMG4 faced the camera and the kids, just as a creature who was half-Mario, half-blue dog made his appearance.

"We're so glad you kids could make it." SMG4 said cheerfully, "Mario, look who's here?!"

Mario made a whimpering sound and his owner asked him what was the matter. Despite being half-dog, Mario could still talk like a human would, and replied, "Mario's spaghetti is missing."

"That's so terrible!" SMG4 yelped, looking at the camera dramatically, "If only there was something we could do to help..."

Suddenly, Mario started to cough, and SMG4 stepped aside right before his beloved pet threw up a ball of meat covered in stains. "Oh, of course!" SMG4 exclaimed, "We can play Mario's Mysteries to find the spaghetti..." Mario got excited and the show's host turned to the camera, "...and we're going to need your help. Will you help us find Mario's spaghetti?"

No response, mostly due to the fact the kids were distracted by Mario's throw-up, and the cameraman was trying to get it off. SMG4 frowned with anger and suddenly pulled out a gun, he pulled the trigger and blasted away the chunk Mario regurgitated.

"You're going to help us, right?" SMG4 repeated to the kids as he put away the gun.

"Yes." A couple kids said.

"Okay." Another kid said.

"You will? Great!" SMG4 whooped, "Let's go! Now remember, those mystery meatballs will be on the clues. Oh, before I forget, you know what we're going to need to play Mario's Mysteries? Our handy-dandy..."

"Smartphone." A few kids finished for SMG4.

SMG4 pulled out his phone. "That's right." He said, "You are smart, kids."

"Ooooh." Mario began to bark excitedly.

"Now, you might be wondering..." SMG4 looked at the camera and the kids directly, "...why can't Mario solve the mystery himself? It's because he's..."

"Not smart?!" A couple of the guests guessed.

"Right again. And do you know what word do we use to describe someone who isn't smart?" SMG4 went on.

"No!" The kids exclaimed.

Mario whimpered nervously. He'd been through this so many times, being called out for not being smart, and it did not help his confidence. And it wasn't helped by the fact that his owner was going to start explaining how they address someone's lack of intelligence. SMG4 smiled, knowing he was going to do what the dog dreaded he would do.

"I'll put it into simple terms for you, kids." SMG4 said, and he began to sing...