A/N: I found this in the archive, so this is set mid-season 4, based off the events in Rocketear. Hope you all enjoy!

I do not own Miraculous Ladybug, or its characters or anything about it. All rights go to Thomas Astruc and whoever else has the rights.

Italics represent thought processes.

"Bro, you have no idea how it is, dating a superhero. Like, how many people get to say they've kissed a superhero? Or they've been rescued by a superhero? Or that a superhero likes them? How many people can say they've done it all? It's not many, my dude."

"Haha. Yeah. Must be so cool."

"I'm telling you, man, if Ladybug ever shows interest in you, go for it. It'll be so cool! Then we can go on double dates- wait, no we can't. Because either she will be in costume and we won't, or we will all be in costume and you won't." He tapped his chin indecisively. "I'm surprised she hasn't given you a miraculous." Adrien gritted his teeth. She has, but I can't exactly tell Nino I was the snake and I failed! The snake is Luka's miraculous now! And I can't tell Nino that I'm Chat Noir, either! But I need to tell him that I've done all this stuff! Oh! I could just say that I've done it with Ladybug in my civilian identity.

But then he could ask Ladybug, and she would say no. A voice suspiciously like Plagg said in his mind. But it was too late. Adrien was already telling Nino.

"Y'know, Nino, I've done all that stuff, too."

"I know Ladybug saved you, dude, it was all over the news! I would be a bad bro if I didn't know. But I think there would be photos if she did the other stuff with you. And we would have heard if she was dating someone, and something would have been different with Chat Noir." Adrien stopped walking. That's actually really smart, for someone who thought Alya was cheating with Chat Noir. Ahh, think of something, quick! Er… what to say, what to say… Adrien ran to catch up with Nino.

"That's not what I've meant. I've done all of that, with Chat Noir." Wait, what? Adrien thought. Wait, what? Plagg invaded Adrien's mind.

"Wait, what?" Nino asked. "Chat Noir? How do I not know this?" He gasped. "I'm a bad bro!" Meanwhile, Adrien was hyperventilating. How did this happen? Did I just tell Nino he was dating himself? Wait, but he knows that I'm – that Chat Noir - is single!

This is going to be a hard one to get out of, kid! Plagg cackled in Adrien's mind.

"Er- yeah, it's a recent thing."

"Recent as in, Ladybug's magical charms recent?"

"More recent. This was just before- er, before you thought Alya was… well, you know."

"So that's how you knew Chat Noir wasn't dating Alya! Why didn't you tell me?"

"Um, it wasn't official then? And he, er, asked me not to tell anyone?"

"Bro! I never knew you like guys! This is so cool! Chat Noir, my dude! Does he come over? Does he stay the night? Is he a good kisser?"

"Nino!"

"Well, is he?"

"You can't tell anyone." Nino mimed zipping his lips. "Not even Alya." At this, Nino started sweating slightly. He scratched the back of his head, which seemed to shrink into his shoulders.

"Ehehe, well…" He held up his phone, where it showed his most recent message to Alya.

"I just found out my bro's dating Chat Noir? NINO!"

"Sorry, bro! I can't keep secrets from her! It's a reflex by now to tell her everything she'll find interesting!" Adrien sighed.

"This is going to be fun."

Marinette and Alya were sitting in the art room. Mari was working on her designs, and Alya was writing her next blog post. A ringtone chimed.

"Oh! I just got a text from Nino!" She gasped. "WHAT?"

"Alya, please keep it down!" Jean-Pierre said.

"Sorry!"

"What is it?" Marinette asked.

"Er- um- well, you see…"

"What?" Marinette pressed.

"You don't want to know! Trust me Marinette, please!"

"Alya, what did Nino tell you?" She used her no-nonsense glare she had perfected when putting up with Chat's flirting. Alya sighed.

"… Nino said… I'm not going to tell you." Marinette tackled her until she had the phone.

"Aha!" She held it up triumphantly. "I just found out my bro's dating Chat Noir?" She gasped. "WHAT!?" She stood up.

"Marinette!" Jean-Pierre reprimanded.

"Sorry!" She sat back down. "What? Since when?"

"I don't know!"

"But Chat Noir isn't dating anyone! He would have told me! And he would have acted differently! Oh, wait…" She trailed off, staring into space.

"Marinette?" Alya prodded a few seconds later. Marinette looked at her best friends, eyes wide as she pieced together her thoughts.

"Chat is acting differently. He isn't talking to me as much, leaves as soon as the fight is over… and Adrien's been acting differently too! Could it actually be that Adrien's dating Chat Noir?!" She shouted. Unfortunately for her, the whole art room heard her last couple of words.

"Adrien's dating Chat Noir?" Several heads poked out from their various projects, eyes wide, ready to absorb this new gossip. Alya nodded, showing them the text Nino sent her. Marinette stared out of the window, deep in thought about the changes in both Adrien and Chat's behaviours. Something isn't lining up here…

"This is huge!" Alix exclaimed.

"Like, they would be so cute." Juleka muttered.

"They really would!" Rose cooed, before noticing Marinette's expression. "Oh no, Marinette, are you okay?" Marinette snapped back to reality, having completely missed the conversation. Oh no, who just asked me what?

"Mmhmm." She said noncommittally to the room. Her friends glanced at each other, mistaking her reaction for heartbreak. Alya tapped furiously on her phone, and seconds later, each of the girls' phones vibrated in their hands. Glancing down at them, they looked at each other, nodding. They would do whatever it took to get a smile back on their class representative's face.

"So, the kisses? They good?"

"I- um, yes?"

"Come on dude, you can tell me ya know!"

"Yeah…" he stopped walking again. Nino frowned.

"Adrien?" All he could do was shakily point. As Nino turned around, he was greeted by the 5 girls, glaring menacingly at Adrien. Even Rose had managed to get a decent glower. Alix cracked her knuckles and narrowed her eyes.

"So." Alya started, sauntering towards them. Nino gulped. "What's this I hear about you dating Chat Noir?" Adrien groaned, as a certain bluenette ran to catch up with her friends, having realised both their absences and the missing puzzle piece.

"Girls! Let him be!" They all spun around, their gazes softening.

"I love you, Mari, but Adrien needs to get what he deserves." Marinette pulled Alya aside.

"No, Alya, I think we've got it all wrong. Chat Noir and Adrien have been really sad recently. I said they've been different, but they certainly haven't been happy."

"So then what happened?"

"I don't think they're dating. I think they broke up."