My Darling Sweetheart

Warning: Nothing, unless you need a warning for Don making questionable decisions.

A/N: Heyyy! Guess what? Now my WIFI doesn't work and I have no clue why. I'm three steps away from screaming to the high heavens rn. I was like "God…for once…can you not do this to us?" I just want a damn break with nothing going on. No shenanigans, no bullshit, just a calm week where everything is working like it's supposed to. But god forbid I get chill week. Next week better be sunshine and rainbows because I am three steps away from filing a formal complaint against fate and whoever is in charge of it. Plus, I need to mentally prepare myself in order to make a phone call to the gas company today/tomorrow because heh….the social anxiety is real and it's winning.

At least now I can cope with writing, so that's a good side. Anyways, that's all from me. Have a nice day!

Don wasn't one to show outward emotion. But, as soon as he read that letter, he felt like he was going to cry right then and there. Thankfully though, he was able to hold off, at least for a little more. Unfortunately, he wasn't able to stop his hands from trembling, his whole body felt like it was being pulled apart at the seams. So it was him…the ONE time I was hoping I was wrong. That meant that it was partly Don's fault that the agent was dead.

Wait…the accident!

Don was so caught up in his emotions that he forgot to factor in the accident. Was Baker connected to that as well? Don didn't think he'd be able to forgive himself if that was the case. Judging by how showy and arrogant Baker was, Don had a feeling that he would find out about that very soon.

He wasn't even done with that thought when the phone rang, causing Don's heart to stop for a second. Unlike with the box however, he immediately pulled it out, needing to see who it was before letting out a sigh of relief.

It's just Dad…thank god.

Don took a deep breath and forced himself to be calm, turning voice into something more level. "Hey Dad, is everything okay?"

"Everything's fine Donnie, I'm just on my way to visit your team in the hospital."

Don raised an eyebrow at that. "And…? You don't need my permission to visit them, you know?"

His father scoffed, sounding amused at that. "I don't need your permission to do anything Donnie, I'm your father."

Don would've replied with, and a civilian, but he didn't think that would fly over well with the older man. So instead, he said "then why are you calling me?"

"Well I got an envelope written for you, but sent to my- I mean, Charlie's address."

Don would've been amused at the slip up if he wasn't so worried about what his father said. "Envelope? Did you open it up?"

"I did. There wasn't much inside. Just a few pictures. One is of the house, the others are pictures of Megan, Colby, and David's residence along with one that I didn't recognize. And lastly, there was this weird picture of a half eaten apple. Did you-"

Don wasn't listening anymore. All of his energy was focused on not hyperventilating on the spot. Panic rose slowly, threatening to overtake all of his senses. He's here…he's here…he's here…the mantra repeated within his mind over and over again like a broken record. He's going after them to get to me. He's going to hurt them because of me. How do I protect them? How do I- Of course…Don would've laughed hysterically at his half-baked plan, an extremely stupid one that he was ninety percent sure would get him killed one way or another. But, was death really that bad when the alternative was getting his loved ones hurt because of him?

"-Don? Are you listening to me?"

Don snapped himself out of his thoughts. "Yeah…I'm here" he replied, aware that his voice now held a controlled note to it, like he was trying to hold something back. Thankfully though, his father didn't notice that.

"Anyways, that's the reason why I called. Maybe next time, remember that you have an actual apartment instead of cluttering up the mailbox."

"I'm there almost half of the time dad, so you can't blame me for slipping up once in a while" he replied, attempting to inject some lightness into his voice.

"What am I going to do with you…" his father muttered fondly. "Well, I'm on my way to the hospital now. Don't want to drive and call. See you later Donnie."

Don remembered what was going on, the subtle threat that Baker had sent him and felt fear. Fear about the fact that this might be the last time he got to speak to his family. Please…don't make me lose them. I don't care about getting kidnapped or dying, but don't make me lose them. "Careful Dad and…" he hesitated for a moment before continuing, "I love you, you and Charlie more than anything in this world."

The rustling from his father's end stopped. "Donnie, is everything okay?"

"I'm fine" he replied, smiling even though he could feel moisture start to gather in his eyes. "Just got a rough case that got to me. Everything will be okay soon."

There was a thoughtful hum on the other line before his father spoke again. "You know you have all of us right when things get too tough? Just remember that you have a family who would do anything to help you."

"Yeah, I know," Which is why I'm keeping all of this from you guys. Don was seriously about to cry right then and there. He wasn't emotional by any stretch of the word, but this? This horrible, fucked up situation was enough to make him break down like he had all those years ago right in front of his mother's grave.

"Good. And Donnie?"

"Hmmm?"

"I love you too" then the line went dead. Don hung his head down as he gripped his phone tightly, gritting his teeth angrily. Don't cry, you're doing it for them he repeated that line in his head. He took a deep breath, determination to make everything right by everyone fueling him, putting his anxiety on the back burner. I can do this.

First order of business though, material. He placed the box in one of his drawers before going to the elevator, the floor that contained the room with casefiles being his destination. It wasn't hard to acquire them since he was investigating that case, just needed to get his signature and done, a box full of files both on the case and now Baker was in his hands.

He hauled the box outside and to his car, acutely aware of the shit that he's going to get into once everyone found out. But Don wasn't much of a rational person when his family was in danger, his only instinct screaming PROTECT THEM in his head. He hoped that with this stunt, Baker would be lured away from his loved ones.

He tossed the box into the backseat of the car, then hopped in. His next destination was his house.

After driving like a mechanical machine, he finally reached his house. He parked his car and quickly went upstairs, bunching his shoulders up at the possibility of what might await him. Once he reached his door, he hesitated for a second, his body tense. He had a strong feeling that something was inside, something from Baker that was designed to throw him off his game. Bastard's too good not to do that he growled in his head. He sent letters and packages to his office and Charlie's house, why wouldn't the bastard send something to him as well.

Get your shit together Eppes he snarled to himself, steeling his emotions before slamming the door open, gun in hand just in case. His apartment room was just how he left it, neat with a few things thrown around in his haste. He creeped slowly, gun in hand, up to his living room. As soon as he got there, his breath got instantly caught in his throat.

There, on the coffee table in front of the television was a small stack of pictures, a perfect blood red apple sitting on top of it. Without waiting for the nerves to invade him again, Don ran up to the desk, tossed the apple away and went to look at the pictures underneath it. As soon as he saw them, his knees buckled once more and he fell to the ground, horrified.

"No…" he whispered, clutching his chest as he felt his throat tightening, forcing his breaths to come out in short and shallow bursts. His head spun, causing everything to mix into a blur, Baker's voice ringing in his ears in his eerily calm and overly affectionate way.

"So now, not going to hold back. I AM going to break you. Destroy every single connection you've ever had to your past life until there's nothing left."

"Don't worry darling, I'll take good care of you."

"It's unfair…even when you're crying you're still angelic."

"And I love you," Baker replied. "See you later, my darling sweetheart."

"Stop, Stop, STOP!" He screamed, clutching his head desperately to block out the noise, swallowing back a sob. He dropped to the floor on his knees, pressing his head desperately on the floor for some sort of anchor to reality as he screamed in fear, anger, and desperation. "No more…please…enough" he begged, hands shaking as they gripped his hair tightly. He looked up at the pictures scattered in front of him, dropped during his fall and he could feel the anger and fear flooding him. Your mess, you clean it up Eppes. Or…are you too much of a coward to do it yourself?

"Shut the fuck up" he hissed, the sudden anger at that somehow managing to kick him out of his mental breakdown. He shakily ran a hand through his hair, his earlier half-baked plan becoming more and more sound the longer he thought about it. "I'm going to do this, I'm going to fix my mistakes" he muttered to himself as he slowly got up, trembling as he did. Once he was up, he formed a list in his mind of things he needed to do.

"First, I need to make sure he didn't leave anything else" he muttered as he stumbled his way into his room, his body feeling like it's going on autopilot. As he passed by his large desk drawer filled with pictures, one picture in particular fell, causing him to jump in surprise. Looking over, he reached out to see which picture fell. As soon as he saw it, his breath hitched within his throat once more, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

It was a picture of his mother.

Don gripped the frame tightly as his mother's face stared up at him, trust shining behind her eyes like it did all those years ago. His mother's calm confidence at his abilities, her request to take care of everyone and protect them, all of that caused an overwhelming sense of self-loathing to wash over him. Sometimes, when Don felt like getting angry or giving up, his promise to her rang out in his head.

"Please, take care of everyone when I'm gone. Can you do that?"

And Don agreed. He told her that he'd take care of everyone no matter what. Whenever his father or Charlie got sad or sunk into some sort of funk, his mind screamed at him to fix it. When someone threatned them, Don tried everything in his power to protect them. But this time, he was the one that brought danger to their doorstep. He was the one that was a danger to them. He sworn to protect everyone, but what happens when the danger is himself? What then?

He looked down, belatedly realizing that there were wet drops on the broken glass, his hands shaking as the gripped the edges of the frame. He reached to touch his face, staring blankly as he pulled away to see his fingertips wet with tears. Oh, I'm…crying…he thought, his chest an odd mix of hollowness and anger, mostly at himself.

There was only one way to fix this, but could he really do it? Would he be able to do it himself? He knew what he was going to do would hurt everyone in his life, but was it worth it to ensure that everyone would be okay? He was just one person, an insignificant one at that. Everyone would be able to move on eventually. Even his family who he knew would be devastated if anything happened to him would move on eventually, his team would be there to help him. In the end, this would be the best thing he's ever done in his life.

So why did he hate himself even more for committing to it?

He stared down at the picture once more, even more droplets started to land on the glass. He could imagine his mother's disappointed face looking at him. "God…I-" he choked, trying so hard not to cry even more. But it seems that since the floodgates had opened, he could do nothing but be a victim to its currents. "I'm so sorry…I can't…I don't want to do this" he sobbed as he slid down to the floor, clutching the picture to his chest. "I-I don't wanna hurt them but god…I have to…" He curled up into a ball, pressing his forehead against the picture that was laid in between his knees. "Mom…I'm so sorry" he cried as he felt the promise between him and his mother, the last link he had to her before she died, shatter to the ground.

"I failed."

A/N: Ouch! Poor Don, the misplaced guilt is really eating him up. Now that he's mentally free falling, he's going to be extremely reckless (like he wasn't before…). Three guesses as to what his plan is (knowing him though…I'm sure you guys can guess on your first try). This will be the start of the Saga of Don Eppes and his increasingly idiotic plans (TM).