Chapter 23

The Sweet Loss of Control

Morgana couldn't sleep. Her dreams were riddled with fear and disturbing visions. Those words kept echoing over and over.

Merlin will be the death of me.

She awoke with a scream stuck in her throat after a particularly vicious vision of Merlin shoving a sword into her chest. It was so real, felt so real. She didn't know what to think of the vision, only that her visions always came true. The look in Merlin's eyes was enough of a confirmation to leave her on edge. Just the thought of him made her blood boil in both rage and arousal and waking with the image of Merlin slaying her didn't deter the feeling. She still wanted him desperately. She needed to find a way to take away his will to harm her. She needed control.

Morgana began to get worried. She had not seen or really talked to him much. She had to find him and attempt to correct what she could. Which is what led her out here walking the halls in her nightgown and robe in a state of reckless desire. She followed the pull of his magic, not that she recognized it as his he was easy to find.

She headed to the healing waters. She wanted to see him. Needed to see him. Merlin. She grit her teeth. The name alone sent a torrent of hate and longing through her. She tugged mentally trying to dissuade herself from going to him. He was still angry with her about his mother. But by forcing his hand he knew how otiose it was to fight against her. Only Morgana didn't factor in Merlin's rage. It was unlike any other she had witnessed. It was terrifying and intoxicating. An unstable force of nature that couldn't be tamed, but she wanted to try.

In the last two days the only thing Merlin has done is alternate between soaking in the healing water every six hours, sleeping, and hating her. Whenever their paths crossed he sent her a hot seething glare that made the cold silence all the more frigged.

It was the third day and the culling was tomorrow. He still had not given her an answer on whether or not he would do as asked and cull out the weaklings. If he didn't Mordred would fix the problem for them both and she didn't exactly share in his taste of savagery.

She pushed open the door to the healing water's chamber and walked in. Her eyes roamed each tub for Merlin but she didn't see him. She took off her heels so she wouldn't slip and walked along the outer row of tubs. At the end in the last tub she saw him floating on his back. She hesitated. She didn't know what to expect. They haven't shared words since he walked out of the isolation cells. She sighed and walked over to him.

"Merlin." Morgana said. No answer.

Morgana sat down on the ledge and stuck her feet in the water slowly so as not to disturb him. She braced her knees on either side of Merlin head but no matter how hard she tried to keep the water still the light ripples sent his eyes shooting open.

Merlin dunked under the water and flipped around to face her and stood up out of the tub. She watched, entranced, as the water droplets trailed down his body and dripped from his pitch black hair that clung to his face. She followed a drop as it traveled down his chest to his abdomen and lower. She let her eyes follow the trail of hair that led from his belly button down to the smattering of pubic hair. She noticed with some modicum of pleasure that he was naked. Morgana flushed and a sweet heat burst from her core. Unfortunately he was covered by the water so she couldn't get a proper view.

Merlin rubbed the water from his face. He wiped his hair from his eyes and ran his fingers through his hair. He looked at Morgana. Really looked at her. She wore a simple lavender nightgown with a white ivory rob cinched loosely at the waist. No jewelry. No shoes. Her hair was let down and her face was flushed. She looked like she had been sleeping recently. Her hair framed her tired face in a beautiful chaotic cascade of curls. A lethal beauty.

Merlin hadn't seen her much at all since his mother- he stopped the thought. It would lead him down a path of darkness. He fought against the pull to spiral out of control. He has learned not to underestimate the allure of darkness. Even the purest hearts were drawn to it. He had had to fight like hell and fighting has made him who he is. Ruthless. Protective. Kind. Tolerant. Wise. Relentless. Powerful. Morgana has no idea what she had ultimately created. She wanted a beast that could be controlled and instead created a monster that was uncontrollable.

"Morgana," Merlin greeted boldly.

Merlin shifted under her gaze when she didn't answer. She just stared at him hungrily. He felt himself stir and harden at her gaze. He had to keep a tight leash on himself. He just wanted to reach across the space and wring her neck, or fuck her senseless. Either would do right now in his aphotic state of mind.

"Hi." She said, her voice husky from sleep.

Merlin's pupils expanded. She smirked. His mouth turned down in disgust. How could his body react to her so violently?

Merlin walked to the stairs and got out of the tub. Morgana looked up at him , watched his every move. He felt his stomach stir and his balls tighten. Just looking at her called to the wildness in him. He swallowed suddenly. His mouth watered. He could already taste her. He turned away and walked to the far wall to grab a towel. He didn't even try to hide his half erect member that throbed for her. Morgana got up and followed leisurely behind him enjoying the view.

"What do you want, Morgana?" Merlin rasped. He wiped his face and looked at her as he dried the rest of him.

What did she want? Honestly, Morgana wanted him to take her. To fuck her into oblivion. She bit her lip and gazed at him from under her lashes. What would it be like to have him and all that power and anger and ferocity pounding into her.

"Well? What is it?" Merlin asked, a little irritated with her.. "What do you want?"

She cocked her head slightly to the side as if his words confused her. She ran her hand through her hair, over her breasts and stomach down to her special spot. "You." She breathed. "I want you."

Merlin froze. He held back a moan. Merlin's cock jumped. He grit his teeth and shove his desire down. He could do this. He could resist her. She was a monster that played well with his demons and he needed her to back the hell off before he did something he would regret. She had never once uttered such words. Not even an 'I love you' when it was so very clear to them both. Now it was all hate and anger and hot desire.

"Excuse me?" Merlin asked. Surely he hadn't heard correctly. She walked towards him enticingly.

"I want you to fuck me, Merlin." She ordered. She leaned towards him and licked the side of his mouth playfully. "Don't hold back." She whispered. "I'm yours for the taking." She leaned back and looked at him challengingly.

Merlin's blue eyes completely eclipsed of color as his desire overtook him. She shouldn't have said that. He dropped his towel to the floor and stepped towards her. He stalked Morgana, walked her backwards and shoved her into the wall. It knocked the breath from her lungs.

Morgana breathed hard and looked up at him through her lashes. He pressed himself into her. His fingers dug into her hips. She gasped. Thrilled at the strength, confidence and control he exhibited.

She lifted her dress in one hand and wrapped her legs eagerly around his waist. He stopped her and shook his head. Ruffly he flipped her around and pushed her back into the wall. He shoved her dress up and over her waist baring her for him. He pressed closer and the moment he felt the heat of her entrance he thrust into her.

She cried out at the intrusion. He growled knowing he had hurt her. He didn't care, he couldn't. He started to move. She moaned low in her chest. He grabbed a fistful of hair and pulled her head back. He pressed her against his chest exposing her neck. She moaned at the tiny tugs his fingers made wrapped in her hair. He bit down on the spot between her shoulder and neck and sucked, hard. She moaned. Her inner wall spasmed around him. He groaned into her neck.

Merlin felt her struggle to keep hold of her cries while he fucked her. His hands snaked around her slender neck as he pounded into her with all the rage and anger she inspired within. He gave into it and lost something of himself in the act. Something she now had that he could never reclaim. It was a part of his innocence, a part of his need to believe he could change her. It was his acceptance that she was an evil that couldn't be reasoned with. It took everything in him not to strangle her now. Instead he let his hands roam around her, one caressed her abdomen the other cupped her plump breast, her nipple rested in his palm. His other hand traveled lower and lower until he reached her special spot as he pumped into her, in, out, in out. He squeezed her breast and captured her nipple between his thumb and forefinger and rubbed them over her peaked nipple, hard. She groaned, arching her breast harder into his grip.

This time they didn't have to hold back their cries. This time Merlin reveled in the violence of the way he took Morgana. There was no kindness in this, only lust and hate and raw desire.

Morgana cried out as she tensed and clenched down on his member. He pounded harder, faster into her. The only sound in the room was the echoing of their bodies slamming together. With a deep moan, he felt her drench him with her climax. She pressed back onto him, taking him deeper. The sensation sent him over the edge. Merlin came harder than he'd ever imagined he could. Her wet walls throbed and squeezed him in the most delicious way, wringing him dry. But the rush of euphoria was tainted by the inevitable outcome their fate will take.

Merlin pulled away. He bent down, retrieved his towel from the floor and cleaned himself off before he handed Morgana a separate towel.

Merlin wrapped the towel around his waist and grabbed his clothes he had left on the table near the towels. He then turned and walked to the door without a word. He paused as he listened to Morgana regain her breathing. He heard the light tinkle of water as she cleaned herself off in one of the tubs. Merlin grit his teeth and with a furious curse he viciously tugged open the door and stormed down the hall.

Morgana didn't see him leave. Honestly, she wasn't paying attention. She dipped inside the pool of healing water letting its warmth envelope her. She was sore. She was definitely going to feel it tomorrow. She smiled. She had enjoyed herself immensely but... she frowned...The danger she felt while he drove into her set her on edge. His hands around her neck…she, for a moment, thought it would end there, lost in ecstasy. It was like he was fucking her and at the same time imaging her death at the same time.

Morgana saw it in his eyes as he stalked her into the wall. She shivered. That raw undisguised hatred and anger was so powerful she felt her fight or flight instincts come fighting sluggishly to the surface.

"I think I created a monster." She whispered into the dim room with only her voice to echo back in reply.