"SPACE WARRIORS 2000" is certainly a strange piece of history in regards to the Ultraman franchise.
It all started when in 1974, Chaiyo Pictures, a film studio from Bangkok, Thailand led by film producer Sompote Saengduenchai, collaborated with Tsuburaya, the studio behind the cult classic Japanese superhero series Ultraman, to produce "HANUMAN AND THE 7 ULTRAMEN," a feature-length film of the iconic hero exclusively for the Thai film market.
However, in the years to come, Saengduenchai would quickly be revealed as a conman, falsely claiming that Tsuburaya had sold the rights to the franchise as a whole to himself.
One of many people to fall for this falsehood were business partners Dick Randall and Marc Smith, producer and director of films made specifically for American television.
The one film to catch their eyes was none other than "HANUMAN AND THE 11 ULTRAMEN," an unauthorized re-edit of both Tsuburaya and Chaiyo's efforts made without Tsuburaya's consent.
In conjunction with Cinema Shares, the official TV rights-holders for the Godzilla series of films, in 1985, Randall and Smith produced their own re-edit of Saengduenchai's own re-edit of the film made by him and the studio he would later steal from, known as "SPACE WARRIORS 2000" under the name of "Spectacular Films International."
Due to the unauthorized use of footage from pre-existing Ultraman series made after the release of the officially authorized "7 Ultramen" edit, as well as the fact that the film was not licensed by Tsuburaya in any form, the film only aired on television stations across the US a small handful of times before Ultraman's copyright owners successfully sued both studios into oblivion, effectively getting Space Warriors 2000 banned from American airwaves (reports of the film airing on independent stations as late as 1991 in major cities such as Washington DC, however, have been mentioned by various online users.)
So far, only two complete recordings of this film have been preserved by the internet, a VHS recording from Hollywood, CA containing only one scene, and a mostly complete, if shoddily recorded version of the film available to watch on both YouTube and The Internet Archive.
This print, however, is by no means a complete version of the film, and many film preservationists have searched to find the full, unedited film to no avail.
Until now, that is, for I myself may have just found what many have been searching for for decades...
Or so I thought...
In July of 2024, I took my annual summer vacation in a sleepy farming town in upstate New York.
A few meters away from the town grocery store, I decided to head over to my favorite thrift store, hoping to browse their seemingly endless supply of VHS tapes.
As usual, the science fiction section had almost nothing noteworthy as far as boxed copies went, but looking through the recordable blank tapes labeled with the titles written in pen on the undersides of the cassettes, a certain something took my breath away and gave me the shock of my life.
Written on the underside of one tape was none other than the infamous, number one guilty pleasure of mine when it came to so-bad-they're-good movies: SPACE WARRIORS 2000.
Immediately, I grabbed the tape, put it into an empty VHS case from the box of cases near the counter, and purchased it as fast as I humanly could.
The entire drive back to my house, I was ecstatic as could be, I couldn't believe I now had my very own copy of the legendarily rare bootleg Ultraman movie in my hands.
Upon arriving home, I couldn't wait any longer, I rushed to my bedroom, fired up my TV, turned on the VCR, and prepared for the one-and-a-half hours of pure, hilarious insanity.
Nothing could possibly prepare me, however, for what this little videocassette had in store.
The tape began with the last few seconds of a commercial, what was being advertised, I couldn't tell, as it faded out just as the video started.
The ID for the most likely independent, syndication-reliant station airing the film, a monochrome image of a powder blue bluebird accompanied by powder blue text of the stations' callsign to the right faded into view, accompanied by a charming yet eerie jingle performed on an old Moog synth.
A woman's voice could also be heard stating "This is KYES, the finest television that Boulder City has to offer."
Admittedly, I wasn't quite sure how a tape from Boulder City, Nevada ended up in New York, my best guess was simply because the tape was owned by a resident who had moved to my area at some point.
After the station ID ended, a "coming up next" promo for the film began playing, a colorful 80's CGI series of stars and other patterns, with plenty of gradients and early attempts at 3D imagery with a filmstrip to the right displaying footage of the film that was about to play.
For this bumper, an 80's pop song with a groovy saxophone melody began playing, accompanied by a narration provided by an enthusiastic announcer best suited for a game show.
"You're watching KYES, 'kay-yes,' in beautiful Boulder City, Nevada! This evening, in the hands of a boy of pure heart, a space warrior doll magically comes to life and flies to join the other warriors of the galaxy council, and in outer space they battle hideous alien monsters who are bent on destroying the planet Earth in tonight's 8:00 Movie Mania Extravaganza, SPACE WARRIORS 2000, starting now on KYES!"
As someone who had thoroughly researched this film in my spare time, I could tell the film's description was slightly paraphrased from a piece of promotional material likely taken from a TV Guide or a pamphlet issued to TV stations.
The film began in a noticeably higher-quality but still washed-out print with the opening animation of the familiar navy-and-red Cinema Shares logo, as seen on TV airings of various Godzilla movies from the time.
This was then followed by the never-before-seen Spectacular Films International logo, which was not quite as "spectacular" as I was hoping, but I guess it was still slightly impressive for a film as low-budget as this.
The opening credits for the film faded into full view as the heroic stock music blazed forth in all its cheesy glory, static cutouts of the Ultramen and even Hanuman, the beloved Thai folk hero included in Saengduenchai's projects, moving from left and right as the opening credits text and its attempts at humor appeared on-screen amongst the minimalistic action.
This illegitimate film's reimagining of the Ultra-mythos went something like this:
An American businessman living with his wife and son in what is presumed to be London arrives home from a business trip in Austria (and NOT Canada as the cheap airplane stock footage would have you believe) with a mysterious action figure of Ultraman.
However, this seemingly ordinary toy possesses a profound secret: unbeknownst to this family, this little figure is no figure at all, but rather, the real Ultraman in disguise, who recruits the young boy, whose name is Nicholas, into the ranks of the "Space Warriors," the name of the Ultra Brothers in this English translation.
Something else noteworthy is that every character besides Ultraman, Ultra Mother, Ultra Father, and Hanuman has been renamed, a roll call is provided at the start of the film, but around the film's halfway point, names are applied to whatever Ultraman happens to be on-screen, with the most common being either "Batcar" or "Gathar," indicating that the writing team could not keep track of who was who in the already generation-loss affected footage.
What I saw before the scene of Ultraman and Nicholas arriving on the Land of Light (it, like most of the film, comprised of pre-existing Ultraman footage stolen from official Ultraman films) could only be considered a discovery of a lifetime.
Indeed, what was believed to be the full recording posted online was only partial. Many scenes (aside from ones that were partially cut off by faulty recording) filmed by director Marc Smith that were not in Sompote Saengduenchai's original Thai version were not only kept intact, but had in fact been just discovered by none other than myself!
Right after Nicholas seemingly falls asleep, instead of going directly to the Land of Light, Ultraman grows to human-size, carries Nicholas under his arm, and flies through a magnificent starfield in space with him, through colorful cosmic clouds, the interiors of space vessels, and many an animated geometric wonder that only the magic of mid-'80's 2D computer graphics could provide.
Indeed, many scenes shot specifically for this knockoff film could be found on this preservation: a scene with the Ultra Brothers fending off an invasion on the Land of Light, a scene with Ultraman wrestling with a bald-headed, reptilian and/or fish-like, but still beautiful alien seductress aboard an alien space station, and a scene of an American science team in navy blue jumpsuits and helmets detecting a spaceship on a surveillance screen which proceeds to bombard their base with missiles.
Nothing, however, could prepare me for what happened later on in the broadcast...
Near the halfway point of the film, as Ultraman was doing battle with a very sassy Gango, the screen abruptly shifted for a fraction of a second with a brief, almost deafening, low-pitched thud before cutting to a blank, black screen.
Roughly ten seconds later, the screen was filled with an Emergency Broadcasting System alert, with the onscreen warning being noticeably captured from an Apple II, or possibly a character generator.
After the standard alert tones, the haunting wail of an air raid siren abruptly started to play, as a member of the station, in a frightened, whimpering voice began to read out loud:
"This is a Civil Defense Alert from KYES. The Soviets have finally made their attack on America and are now attacking the surrounding areas..."
As the voiceover continued, I began to hear the most chilling, mind-scarring sounds I had ever heard in my entire 24 years of living: pained, inhumanly high shrieks of men reduced to quivering, hopeless cowards, a woman screeching in pure agony, distorted, ear-shattering explosions both distant and near, a woman crying loudly in fear while screaming "ULTRAMAN, WHERE ARE YOU? WHERE ARE YOU NOW THAT WE NEED-," her voice being cut off by a bloodcurdling shriek upon her presumed fiery demise.
The audio of the terrifying chaos unfolding continued for another 58 seconds before abruptly cutting to a blank screen, as if the owner of this tape was too frightened to continue recording the sounds of the disaster.
I had no idea what to think, or how to feel. My mind began to feel emotions of sadness, fear, grief, and confusion as the only thing I could do was sit there on my bed and attempt to calm myself down while a raging sensation of pure anxiety began to consume my mind.
Thirty seconds later, while the screen remained blank, the sound of faint radio static began to play, instantly reminding me that I had completely forgotten to turn off the VCR. Two minutes after the sound of AM radio waves had started to warble and hiss, a faint woman's voice suddenly appeared over the feedback, echoing, soulless, and monotone, as it began reading these words out loud:
"Melvin Pasternak, age 45, white American, owner of a local television station, succeeded by his wife and two children."
Each description was separated by the low, hollow ringing of a funeral death bell, and what sounded like soft crying sounds could be heard throughout the readings.
The woman's disembodied voice continued:
"Peter Starr, age 40, white American, television announcer and father of four, children are presumed to be orphaned as their mother was found in nearby Nelson deceased, alone in her family's household while the children were away."
"Eric Leyton, age 38, white American, news anchor, remains of victim could not be located."
"Sylvia Rogers, age 36, white American, news anchor, was set to be engaged to Leyton only one month after the bombings."
"Robert Groves, age 20, white American, studio technician and student of the University of Colorado in Boulder, parents have gone missing, but are believed to have survived."
"Victor Okafor, age 26, black American, weather reporter, no living relatives have been found."
"Marianne Stone, 28, white American, news reporter, her unborn child of eight months was killed in her womb as its mother was engulfed by a series of explosions."
The sound of the static then disappeared, with the tape ending only thirteen seconds later.
I suddenly began to feel terrified to the point of nausea as I tried my hardest not to vomit. Those descriptions were most definitely of the station personnel whose voices could be heard in the alert. The voice reading out the EBS message was most likely Eric Leyton, the news anchor responsible for the station's evening news broadcasts, the agonized shrieks were most likely Sylvia, Robert, and Victor as they were burning to death, and the woman who saw Ultraman as a savior in such desperate times was no doubt Marianne, the young mother-to-be whose dreams for a happy family were cut short by nuclear destruction.
The pre-existing TV commercial for this film with its description of "nuclear wars bringing forth mutants of incredible size and strength," and the newly discovered scene of an alien spaceship bombing a crew of seven members hit harder now, like sick, twisted pieces of foreshadowing that no one could see coming.
Feverishly, I began questioning how these events could have come into existence.
Did the city of Boulder City, Nevada really suffer an airstrike by the Russian Air Force? If so, how do no records of this event exist, and why didn't the rather war-hungry President Reagan take action?
Was this recording all an elaborate hoax? On the other hand, the fear in the voices I heard on this tape was far too realistic to be simple acting, and no mere pyrotechnic effect or stock sound effect ever sounded as powerful as the explosions heard on this recording...
And furthermore, how did the previous owner of this tape survive a nuclear bombing, especially without his or her tape being destroyed in the process?
All of the mysteries surrounding what I had just watched continued to torment my brain for several minutes on end until I finally came to a somber conclusion:
Some mysteries of our world, even to the farthest reaches of the universe, will simply never be explained.
Farewell, Space Warrior.
Until we meet again someday...