Chapter Thirty-Two

Becoming Human Again

"Mr Wilkie?" Carolyn questioned with shock. "What are you doing here?"

"I thought it was about time we had a little chat. About all those things that go bump in the night around here and down at that camp, I've discovered you own. I know you know what I'm talking about."

Carolyn passed a weary hand over her eyes. "I thought we had settled all that over two years ago. We have nothing more to say to each other."

"I think we have a great deal more to say to each other." Wilkie put his hand inside his jacket and produced Carolyn's novel. "Here is my proof that you do."

He waved it triumphantly. "What do you have to say to this, then?"

Carolyn shrugged, walking slowly down to the bottom of the stairs. "It's a work of fiction. That is what I do. I write ladies' romantic fiction. I don't see what someone like you could have possibly gleaned from it."

"I understand this book is not a work of fiction, but fact." Wilkie walked to the foot of the stairs. "I know that I understand more than you know about many things. I intend to write my own book about my findings."

He turned to look around the foyer again, staring directly at Daniel who was standing right behind him.

"I will remove this snivelling wart for you, Madam," Daniel said, his hands flexing at his sides. "Just say the word and he's gone!"

Carolyn shook her head in warning. Elroy sidled over to poke out his tongue at Wilkie.

"Do you want me to fetch Scruffy, Mom?" Jonathan volunteered. "He'll see him off."

"Mr Peabody can also see him off in fine style," Elroy offered eagerly. "He does a nice line in disembodied hissing."

"I think that would all be rather counter-productive," Carolyn sighed. Her head had begun to ache again. "I think Mr Wilkie is aware he's already outstayed his welcome. He was just leaving."

"He most certainly is. And the sooner the better." Daniel dematerialised.

"You're really talking to him, aren't you?" Wilkie pounced. "I can feel him. I know he's here. He's right behind me, isn't he?"

He turned, extending his arms wide and swiping right through Elroy who jumped back in fright, rubbing at his abdomen. "Hey! That hurts!"

"You're feeling overwrought and tired from spending too much time alone. Trespassing where you have no business being," Carolyn replied steadily. "And there is no one here except myself and my family. Now, will you please leave?"

"Do you want me to call the town constable on him?" Martha asked, still holding the front door open.

"No, thank you, Martha. Mr Wilkie knows when he's beaten. There is nothing here for him. There never has been."

"Very well…" Wilkie pushed the novel back into his jacket pocket. "I can see I am getting nowhere for now. But do not think I am leaving this matter alone. I will be back and I will be expecting answers or I'll take matters further." He nodded decisively as he turned away toward the front door.

"The only one who will be taking matters further is me!" an icy male voice declared from the open doorway.

Daniel walked into the foyer, his frowning expression murderous and full of intent to injure. "How dare you push your cowardly way in here with your petty contempt and false declarations to a shipload of women and children! You are nothing but a snivelling coward and a spineless bounder!"

"I… I… I don't believe it. It's you…" Wilkie stared at him, open-mouthed. "I was right all along!"

He eased back to frown into the living room at the portrait hanging above the fireplace. "It is you!"

He clapped his hands with delight. "Oh, I knew you would appear to me if I pushed hard enough! Oh, this is a red-letter day indeed! I have so many questions. So many things I want to know. With your help, my book is going to be a runaway bestseller! And you will help me!"

"I don't know who you think you're seeing, Mr Wilkie," Carolyn replied quickly, shaking her head.

She'd already noticed that Daniel was wearing his cream sweater again, so he was in his earthly form. "This gentleman happens to be my fiancé, Captain Daniel Gregg. And I think you'll find he's very much alive."

"Fiancé?" Wilkie looked totally bewildered. "But this is the man in the portrait in there."

He pointed an accusing finger at Daniel and then to the fireplace. "Can't you see the resemblance? And he's the model for the captain in your book. I knew him immediately. I've researched him enough to see you've been communicating with the dead. You know too many things about what he did and when. The timeline fits right with your story."

"That is simply a portrait of my illustrious ancestor, the original Captain Gregg, nothing more," Daniel replied, advancing on the hapless parapsychologist. "And Mrs Muir has been using his recently discovered sea journals for her research. I have been helping her with that. Anything more is your overworked imagination."

He stabbed a finger at the intruder. "You are the one who assumed and jumped to all the wrong conclusions. There is nothing for the likes of you in this house. There never will be."

He turned to point toward the open door. "Now get out before I throw you out!" he thundered, his powerfully raised voice echoing around the foyer.

"Wow…" Jonathan breathed with awe. "He's really groovy when he gets really mad."

Elroy giggled nervously as he hurried over to stand behind the children. "Yes, isn't he? He used to get that mad at me like that all the time." He beamed with pride.

"But you're not real!" Wilkie declared. "Look, I'll prove it to you all!"

He seized Daniel by the forearm with both hands. He looked completely stunned when he encountered solid flesh and hard muscle beneath his grasp. "I don't understand. I was so sure you're nothing but a ghost…"

"You only understand what you wish to understand," Daniel told him, forcibly removing his arm from the other man's loosened grasp. "And yet you understand nothing at all. I am as real as you." He slammed the flat of his hand hard against Wilkie's chest, making him cough as he staggered backwards toward the door.

Elroy bent down to the children. "I don't understand…" he whispered. "A neat trick, but how'd he do that? My Captain's still a ghost, isn't he?"

"Sssshhh, we'll explain it all later…" Jonathan waved a hand to quieten him.

Mr Peabody stalked over and sat down at his feet. He complained in a long yowl. He was tired and wanted to go home.

"But, but, that's you…" Wilkie waved a frustrated hand toward the portrait above the fireplace as he backed up. "That's you in the painting. I would swear to it on a stack of bibles."

"I'll allow there is some familial likeness," Daniel conceded, using his size and height to herd the smaller man through the open front door. "The man was an ancestor of mine, that is all. Now you will get out and never come back here again. We will be reporting your trespass to the authorities. If I ever see you skulking around here again, I will have you clapped in irons and put behind bars."

"But, I…" Wilkie stammered. "But, you…" He sneezed violently. "What about my deadline? I'll lose my position at the university…"

"You're ill, Mr Wilkie," Carolyn offered solicitously, following the two men. "You really should go home and look after yourself. You've had a bad experience, living all alone out there in that drafty old camp. Your imagination has been working overtime and you've started to see things. You need to take a complete break. Maybe going to live somewhere warm would suit you better."

"Mrs Muir…" Wilkie turned on the porch to look back at her. "Just for my own peace of mind. Did you ever see a ghost around here? I mean, a real apparition? Not just your children playing tricks. I have to know."

"Oh, no…" She smiled at Daniel, feeling her headache easing. "I've never seen a ghost around here. Everyone you can see here, now, are all perfectly real."

Wilkie retreated down the steps, herded by Daniel's looming menace of further physical harm. "Yes, but do you believe in ghosts as I do? I mean, you write your books as if you do."

"Mr Wilkie…" Carolyn sighed. "I'm a woman who never believed in ghosts," she said truthfully. "I told you before, I only deal in romantic fiction. I have no time for things that go bump in the night."

"Ghosts…" The children tittered behind their hands, accompanied by Elroy's high-pitched giggling.

"I think you'll find there's no such thing as ghosts," Carolyn concluded helpfully. "Perhaps it's time now for you to pursue a new line of study. One less stressful on your nerves and state of health."

"Yes, but…" Wilkie stammered. "Perhaps you're right." He sighed. "I have not been myself, lately. But I staked my reputation on it all. I was so sure…"

"Get you gone!" Daniel pointed a finger at Wilkie's car parked outside the front gate. "Before I pick up your miserable carcass and throw you out!"

"All right, all right, I'm going…" Wilkie shuffled down the front path and went out to the driver's side of his car.

He got in and started the engine, hunching over the wheel with another fit of coughing. He drove slowly away without looking back.

Carolyn turned to her husband. "What if he tells of what he saw here and who he met? He could still make trouble when he recovers."

"What did he see and who did he meet?" Daniel replied evenly, escorting her back through the gate. "As you said, everyone here is real. Or soon will be."

"Yes, but he may still get the idea to go digging around about you again. Before you have a chance to cover your tracks."

"Rest assured, my dear…" Daniel drew her close and kissed her hair. "By the time Wilkie recovers from his shock over meeting me I will be firmly cemented in the land of the living. I will have become quite human again. Enough to pass scrutiny, anyway."

"I'm glad…" Carolyn hugged his arm with both hands as they re-entered the house. "But I still don't like the idea of so many people constantly trying to push their noses into our business. It's becoming tiresome."

"That is something over which we have no control." Daniel sighed. "We shall have to be prepared as best we can and deal with every new hurdle as they present themselves. At least we will be doing it together."

"Yes, together. That is all that matters now…" Carolyn nodded, wiping a tear from the corner of her eye.

"You should be resting, my dear," Daniel instructed brusquely. "Now, I can—"

Elroy pounced on them the moment they walked into the house. "I did good, didn't I, my Captain? We saw him off in fine style. He won't try to board us again."

Mr Peabody yowled his complaint. He wanted it known he'd also helped.

"Elroy, you have surpassed all my expectations," Daniel assured him. "A unique experience, I must say. I am proud of you."

"Told ya he'd be happy with you," Jonathan stated, grinning at his ghostly friend.

"Yeah, you did great, Elroy," Candy added.

"Come on, kids," Martha encouraged, guiding them toward the kitchen. "The food will be getting cold and it's not going to eat itself."

"Yes, I did do great." Elroy wriggled with joy as he turned to beam at Carolyn, pulling off his tasselled cap and twisting it between his hands. "And don't you worry about a thing, my Captain's pretty lady. I shall soon set the camp back to rights and make it all snug again. Or my name's not Elroy Applegate. Which it is, of course…"

"Applegate, do not outstay your welcome," Daniel warned. "You may cast off. I shall be out to inspect your work in due course. I expect to find everything ship shape. Do not let me down."

"Yes, Sir! Oh, thank you, Sir!" The hapless seaman saluted briskly. "You'll find everything'll be in tip-top shape! Better then, that Mr Peabody and I go home now. We got a lot to do."

He began to dematerialise. The cat had already vanished.

"We will see you two in the spring," Carolyn reassured him with a smile. "We'll make a family holiday of it."

"Oh, I would like that, my Captain's pretty lady…" Elroy half-reappeared, pulling his cap back onto his head. "I should like that very much."

He slowly faded out completely. "Very much indeed…"

"I suppose it's useless to keep telling him that you do have a name." Daniel shook his head.

"Oh, I don't know," Carolyn replied with a wistful smile. "He's very sweet. I rather like being called your pretty lady..."

She shook her head as tears began to gather in her eyes, threatening to spill down her cheeks. She swallowed tightly, pulling a handkerchief from her sleeve.

Her husband watched her anxiously. "Here, no, now belay that. Why the tears? You know I could never stand to see a woman cry."

He took her by the shoulders and escorted her into the living room. They sat together on the couch. "I command you to tell me immediately what's wrong."

"I can't…" Carolyn shook her head, trying to stem the flow of tears and failing. "You're a man. You wouldn't understand."

"I understand that Wilkie has gone. I doubt he'll be back. We're safe for now and everything is right again. You should be happy."

He waved his hands helplessly. "Not crying like this. What on earth is the matter? Tell me."

Carolyn sniffed, dabbing at her eyes. "Elroy said I'm your pretty lady."

"The man may be an addle-pated fool of the first water, but he is very right in that. You are and always will be my lady." He kissed her temple. "Why does that distress you so?"

"Yes, but, but… pretty?" Carolyn asked tremulously.

"Of course." Daniel groaned. "Look, what is all this? Please tell me what it is that has you so overset."

Carolyn shook her head. "Even when I get fat and my ankles swell and I'm moody all the time?" The tears ran unchecked down her cheeks.

Daniel stared down at her helplessly. "I don't understand."

"It's just that pregnant women have a tendency to become overweight. There will come a time when I won't even be able to see my own feet."

"I have seen pregnant women before," Daniel replied patiently. "And overweight is not the word I would use. I may be from the nineteenth-century, but I am not so foolish as to offer such an unforgivable offence to any woman."

"I didn't know what to think." Carolyn wiped her cheeks with her handkerchief. "I… thought women were often confined to the house in your century. Kept out of sight for being unsightly. Martha told me about it."

Daniel's lips twitched. "Ah, is that what's worrying you? That I will try and turn into a nineteenth-century husband and insist on locking you away from being seen."

He sighed as he drew her close against him. "I told you once the past is a pleasant place to visit. But as a long-term arrangement, I must prefer the here and now, with you. And I want to see you in every one of your stages. The good and the bad. They will all be very beautiful."

He placed his hand on her abdomen, spreading his fingers wide. Carolyn laid her own hand over his.

"I'm glad…" Carolyn used her handkerchief to wipe away the rest of her tears. "I must warn you the bad can get pretty awful at times. Hormones can make a woman hard to live with. Bobby often tried to avoid being around me then."

"I am not your late husband. Stop trying to scare me off." Daniel pulled her closer. "You won't succeed. I'm not going anywhere, no matter how hormonal you may become. I have sailed a ship through the eye of a hurricane and faced down a man-eating shark. I think I'm well prepared for your worst."

"I'll hold you to that," Carolyn whispered, pushing her fingers between his and holding on tight. "Just remember you said it."

"I will. Now you must come and try to eat something," Daniel murmured against her hair. "You need to keep your strength up. We can talk more later when you're rested. We need to plan our campaign for every eventuality. I doubt your parents are finished with us yet."

※※※※※

Three days later:

"There…" Claymore signed the last of the forged paperwork with a flourish. "That should do it nicely. The old judge might be dead but his signature is still valid and it looks real enough. Rather good if I do say so myself."

He beamed with satisfaction as he held the slightly dog-eared document up to the light, inspecting it closely. "The old paper you supplied looks very authentic. I do believe this should pass inspection. I must say I have quite enjoyed myself these last few days."

His look soured as he scowled at the other two unwelcome entities in his office. "If it wasn't for the company I'm forced to keep."

"Despite your protests, you do have quite the talent for forgery." Daniel took the document from him and dusted the forged signature with sand, shaking off the excess. "We may find a use for you again."

"Oh, no…" Claymore shook his head vigorously. "I think this week's work is about all my nerves can stand." He put a hand to his head. "I would never live it down if someone found out."

"He's not going to faint on us again, is he?" Lucius demanded to know, frowning at him as he assembled the forged documents he was to place in their respective files. "I am out of all patience with that foolishness."

Daniel held the document out to his friend. "He won't if he knows what's good for him. This one needs to go into the Beacon Cove archives. It cements my place as the executor of Captain Mathers' will. It should stand up to all but the closest scrutiny. All the rest will fall into place."

"I wish you two would stop discussing me as if I'm not here," Claymore huffed. "I do have feelings, you know."

"You also have a liking for treasure." Daniel shrugged.

"Yes, I meant to ask you about my fee…" Claymore wrung his hands anxiously. "You did say you would make it worth my while…"

"He is worse than the worst pirates we ever encountered on the high seas," Lucius complained. "He makes them seem almost honest in their thievery."

"Oh, Claymore is not one to pass up on making an extra dime…" Daniel shrugged. "I've often said he has a dollar bill for a heart."

"Yes, but without me, the pair of you would be sunk," Claymore replied sharply. "You need me."

"Sadly, that we do…" Daniel waved his hand and a gleaming sapphire appeared on the blotter before his great-nephew's widened eyes. "They say a man should be worthy of his hire."

"I would've preferred greenbacks…" Claymore complained as he hastily picked up the gem and tucked it safely into the breast pocket of his shirt. "But this will do very nicely as a down payment."

"I have one last task for you." Daniel watched him with resignation. "And you have been paid in full."

"Well…" Claymore tugged down the eyeshade on his forehead. "I don't work for free, you know…"

"Let me vaporise the barnacle before he bleeds you dry!" Lucius raised his free hand.

Daniel shook his head. "He will do as I ask because he knows not to push my patience too far."

"You're talking about me again," Claymore complained. "What do you want now? Haven't I done enough for you?"

"One last thing to do to make it all real and above scrutiny."

"Which is?" Claymore regarded his great-uncle with trepidation.

"Now that I am real in the eyes of the human world, I require you to come up to the house and perform a marriage ceremony."

"Who's getting married this time?" Claymore demanded suspiciously. "Is their paperwork all in order? I won't do anything more that's so blatantly illegal. I could lose my license if anyone found out."

"That is where you come in, my dear cousin." Daniel smiled thinly. "Now that I am human you will perform a marriage ceremony for Mrs Muir and myself."

"Oh, no…" Claymore regarded him with horror. "And this…"

He waved a hand at the paperwork Lucius was holding. "You two want me to break all the laws and end my days in gaol eating nothing but hard tack and water."

"Just one last forgery…" Daniel waved his hand. "A simple marriage license, nothing more."

"I don't get it…" Claymore leaned forward, putting a hand against the side of his mouth. "If anyone around the town sees you, they would know that you're not really you. Besides, we will still need two witnesses."

"That is what the forged paperwork is for. To make me real." Daniel shrugged. "And Mrs Muir's housekeeper and Ed Peevey will stand up for us."

"Ed Peevey?!" Claymore blanched. "That man cannot keep a secret! He'll tattle at the first chance he gets! Then everyone will know for sure! I'll be locked up and they'll throw away the key!"

"Martha assures us Peevey most certainly will not," Daniel replied evenly. "And I trust her word. The marriage will be a matter of public record soon enough. We have prepared for that eventuality with all the paperwork we've forged. I will continue to pass myself off as my own descendent and your cousin."

He leaned closer over the desk. "If you assert it is so, as you did with Mrs Muir's parents, then who is to say otherwise, Cousin? A long-last relative now happily found."

"Well… I suppose it could just be possible…" Claymore pushed up his eyeshade to wipe the back of his hand across his forehead. "But, why the rush to get married, anyway? You've been a bachelor for a hundred or more years. Surely a few more won't hurt."

He smiled tentatively. "How about making it a long engagement instead? Until after I retire as a justice of the peace."

He pulled a face as he leaned far back in his chair. "And I'm sure Mrs Muir could do much better than the likes of you," he ventured bravely.

"Have a care to keep a civil tongue in your head and the reason is none of your business," Daniel told him grimly. "You will come up to the house and perform the ceremony as soon as the paperwork has been correctly filed. You will tell no one about any of this on the pain of your own early demise."

"It would be my pleasure…" Lucius leaned closer, raising his hand.

"I… I… was only joking." Claymore chuckled weakly. "I will do as you say, Cousin…"

He inserted a finger behind his shirt collar that had suddenly become too tight. "Of course, I will. You know me. I'll do anything for my family."

"Then let's get to work," Daniel replied. "We have a wedding to plan. We're running out of time and there's still much to do."

"I'll go and sort out this paperwork. Make sure it all goes to the right homes. Then you should be well squared away, my friend and good luck to you. Because if this man is an example of the world you wish to join…" Lucius shook his head as he dematerialised.

Claymore watched him leave with a relieved expression. He removed his eyeshade and reached into a drawer to pull on a different one. "Well, I say it's good luck that I also happen to be the county clerk and this is my office. All marriage licenses must cross my desk. And it's just as well Schooner Bay and Beacon Cove are in the same county."

He cleared his throat pointedly. "Of course, there is a fee…"

"There's always a fee where you're concerned." Daniel sighed. "How much this time?"

"Standard rates. And I want greenbacks this time if it's all the same to you. I can't bank doubloons or jewels in the county's account. It'll look too suspicious."

"You'll get your fee. Now get on with it!"

"Very well. You don't have to shout, you know." Claymore turned to open a drawer in the large wooden filing cabinet behind him. "But I don't set the fee, the county does. Marriage licenses cost money. You do want it all to be correct and above board, don't you? To stand up to inspection."

"You know I do…" Daniel fixed him with a frustrated glare.

His great-nephew tittered nervously as he shuffled through the handful of blank documents he'd pulled from the open drawer. "Once the paperwork is filed then all will be in order. But I still do not see why there has to be such a rush on it."

"That is my business, not yours. How long does the filing take?"

"A week, maybe two." Claymore shrugged. "It depends on how busy they are. I have no control over that and not even you could make it go any faster."

"Then I want to know the moment it all comes through," Daniel instructed.

"Of course, my dear cousin…" Claymore soothed, finding the correct paperwork and holding it up in triumph. "You'll be the first to know as soon as I do."

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