Summary: I have this bad habit of spoiling things so I will just say this chapter is heavily centered on Levi's perspective and adds more context and information.
Notes: It's been a while, sorry for making you wait but life hates me lately. This is a long chapter and I genuinely loved writing it. → Mikasa enlisted in the Survey Corps at the age of 18 (required age).
→ There is no time skip. All the events, including The Rumbling happened in a span of 2 years (sorry Isayama). → There is a timeline in this chapter, I hope it's not too confusing.
7 years ago.
In the bustling corridors of headquarters, Levi found himself immersed in murmurs regarding a certain Mikasa Ackerman. It was here that her name first reached his ears, carried on the lips of those speaking of a remarkable trainee. She had ascended swiftly through the ranks, seizing the coveted top position among the fresh recruits of the 104th Cadet Corps. The shared surname momentarily intrigued him, leading to a brief moment of curiosity about any potential connection between them. He sifted through his memories, but nothing significant surfaced, so he decided not to dwell on it too much. Instead, he considered the possibility of other Ackermans scattered around their small world, unbeknownst to him.
Their paths finally converged when she enlisted in the Survey Corps at the age of eighteen, during the regiment's official recruitment drive. He never pictured her that way—short hair, a fierce demeanor, her stance exuded confidence, her muscles toned and defined like a lioness, hinting at the rigorous training she must have undergone. She stood out among the recruits, her presence commanding attention without her needing to utter a single word, capturing his attention the instant he saw her. Levi's gaze lingered on her for a moment, assessing her with the keen eye of a seasoned soldier. There was something about her, something that piqued his interest beyond mere curiosity. It wasn't just her physical prowess; it was the aura of maturity that surrounded her, beyond her young age. She certainly seemed worth a hundred soldiers. Levi couldn't help but acknowledge the unmistakable resemblance to the Ackerman bloodline.
As the recruitment process progressed, Levi still kept a watchful eye on her, silently noting her every move. There was a potential there, a raw talent waiting to be honed and perfected, proving to be a valuable asset to the Survey Corps, perhaps even surpassing his own expectations. In her, Levi saw a reflection of himself—a relentless determination, a dedicated commitment to the cause.
Hange's voice interrupted his thoughts, bringing a notepad to jot down observations, "Mikasa Ackerman. She's something, isn't she?" She remarked, peering over at Levi.
"We'll find out once we're beyond these walls," Levi responded abruptly.
"And she's quite attractive too," Hange added casually.
"Save your pointless comments for someone who cares," Levi retorted, his tone sharp, eyes still fixed on Mikasa.
Mikasa and Levi initially clashed due to their similar hot-headed personalities, both fiercely loyal and determined in their own ways. Their conflicting approaches often led to friction and disrupted missions. However, as time passed, their relationship took a positive turn. Levi recognized the need to bridge the gap between them and took the lead in repairing their bond. He made conscious efforts to address their differences and emphasized the importance of following orders, something Mikasa struggled with due to her protective instincts towards Eren.
Through patience and understanding, they worked through misunderstandings, ultimately fostering trust between them, which proved to be a formidable asset on the battlefield. Levi's intuition proved correct—Mikasa emerged as his indispensable partner on the terrain.
Despite Levi's distaste for Mikasa's rebellious nature and sharp remarks, he surprisingly allowed her the freedom to express herself openly. This included confronting and criticizing him in front of others, which often left those around them astonished. Levi, ever composed and disciplined, would listen to her words without outwardly showing any sign of irritation.
However, there were moments when Mikasa's words struck a nerve or two, pushing Levi to the edge of his patience. There were also instances when Levi pushed her to her limits as well. In response, she would defy his orders resulting in heated verbal exchanges between them, with neither willing to back down until someone mustered the courage to intervene and defuse the tension. Their dynamic, often resembling that of an old married couple, was a source of both concern and amusement for those around them.
Occasionally, they'd find themselves in situations that would leave Mikasa standing at a distance, her eyes blazing with fire, silently seething with frustration or mentally roasting him back and forth. Levi, on the other hand, in disbelief, questioning the unruly force of the woman he was dealing with.
.
.
Levi: Ackerman, the hell are you doing here?!
Mikasa: Keep showering, Captain, that's none of your concern.
Levi: Just because you chopped off your hair doesn't mean you get to snoop in the men's bathroom.
Mikasa: Trust me, there's nothing to see. Don't flatter yourself, Captain.
Levi: Watch your mouth. Any man with no manners would come out to prove you wrong.
Mikasa: I came to retrieve the women's laundry taken 'accidentally' by one of your men. Full of underwear. I need a name.
Levi: Do I look like I have time for your laundry drama? Get out.
Mikasa: I'm not leaving until you cough up a name.
Levi: Mikasa, in exactly 10 seconds, I'm stepping out. I have no towel, so feel free to stay and enjoy the view, but that misconduct report will be filed.
Mikasa: Screw you.
.
.
Falling into awkward situations became a recurring theme, each mishap adding another brick to the wall of embarrassment they were unwittingly building together. Their preferred method of resolution? Acting as if nothing had happened, choosing to bury the discomfort and carry on as usual, leaving others confused by the sudden chill in the air between them.
Over time, her rebellious nature began to soften, though remnants of it lingered. He played a pivotal role in this transformation by acquainting her with two vital concepts: "calm down" and "patience," which had previously been foreign to her. In exchange, she taught him to lean on her and have faith in her abilities. Through their interactions, he witnessed her compassionate and selfless nature, realizing that her concern extended beyond herself and Eren, revealing another depth of character that surprised him.
.
.
Mikasa: Eat this, I made it for you. It should help you feel better and speed up the healing process.
Levi: How convenient, a damn soup. How can I eat when I can't hold a spoon without spilling everything?
Mikasa: Open your mouth.
Levi: Are you kidding me?
Mikasa: Then starve.
Levi: Fine, you can feed me, but if you breathe a word of this to anyone, you're finished, Ackerman.
.
.
There was an undeniable comfort in her presence too, a warmth that wrapped around him in a way he couldn't explain. Levi frequently found himself reflecting on why she occupied such a distinct corner of his mind, to the extent that he would willingly put his life on the line for her. Was it perhaps some intrinsic connection shared between Ackermans? Another thing that he noticed was their awkwardness in their interactions outside their duties, stripped of their military attire, almost as if they struggled to move beyond their roles as soldiers when together.
Despite that, countless times, they found themselves simply sitting side by side, enveloped in a comforting silence that spoke volumes. It was as though they could understand each other without the need for words. Or amidst small yet meaningful conversations or playful banter, she would reveal her spirited character to his stupefaction. It was in those particular moments that he glimpsed another side of her. A side he grew fond of.
.
.
Mikasa: Captain, what future do you envision if we all make it out alive?
Levi: I hate this question. What about you?
Mikasa: Take Eren with me and settle down somewhere in the countryside.
Levi: Living in the countryside doesn't sound bad, even for me.
Mikasa: Alone?
Levi: Maybe with her, but I fear it's too late.
Mikasa: Just ask her.
Levi: No.
Mikasa: Ask me and imagine it's her.
Levi: Tch.
Mikasa: You won't know if you don't try.
Levi: Feel-like-escaping-to-the-countryside-with-me?
Mikasa: *chuckles*
Levi: What's funny here? You told me to ask you.
Mikasa: Not convincing. Add more emotion.
Levi: I didn't know you were like this Ackerman. Get out of my sight.
.
.
Hange had questioned him about the difference in his treatment of Mikasa, subtly hinting at the possibility of something more between them. Undoubtedly, Mikasa was attractive, arguably the most attractive and captivating woman he had ever seen, evident from the way heads turned when she passed by. Naturally, he found himself drawn to her, often stealing glances that lingered a bit longer than intended. However, he was acutely aware that her heart belonged to someone else, and he respected that boundary. Furthermore, romance was a luxury he couldn't afford. Such things felt out of reach, distant fantasies in the harsh reality he faced daily. The notion of a serious relationship and a future with a partner rarely crossed his mind or were relegated to the back of his mind, overshadowed by survival and duty. Not in this world of uncertainty.
Nonetheless, sometimes, Levi couldn't help but imagine a different world—one where Eren's shadow didn't loom so heavily over their lives. In such moments of contemplation, he wondered if things would be different with Mikasa. Would their dynamic shift? Could there be room for something more between them? He wasn't too sure. What he felt for her was a blend of admiration, respect, and perhaps a faint trace of longing. But that was the extent of it. In the end, he was content to cherish their bond for what it was—a connection forged amidst the chaos of their world, a rare and precious thing in life he found himself grateful for.
She had one significant flaw: Eren. Her obsession—with no better word to describe it, as Levi bluntly put it— was destined to lead her down a hostile path in life, a prediction that later proved to be correct. Levi was always taken aback by her fixation on Eren; it appeared to defy all rationality. Despite his attempts to calmly reason with her and offer advice, urging her to consider life from her own perspective rather than solely through Eren's lens, his efforts were futile. Their conversations about that matter always left a bitter taste in his mouth. It was a frustrating cycle, one that left Levi feeling helpless and unable to break through the walls of that senseless attachment to Eren.
In the span of just two years, the world witnessed a whirlwind of events: from the breach at Trost and Eren's startling transformation into a Titan, to the sealing of Wall Maria, the pursuit of Annie, the upheaval of a coup d'état, encounters with Kenny, and the coronation of Historia. Amidst these tumultuous times, Levi and his comrades confronted the Beast Titan for the first time, unraveling the mysteries concealed within the basement and uncovering the truth about the world beyond the walls.
Unfortunately, during these rapid developments, Levi could never have foreseen the shocking betrayal of Eren, leading to the catastrophic threat of The Rumbling—a terror that hovered over humanity, threatening to obliterate everything in its path. Faced with the grim reality of having to sacrifice Eren to safeguard what little remained of humanity, Levi was confronted with the weight of unimaginable decisions.
When the moment arrived to stop The Rumbling by killing Eren, Mikasa found herself reluctantly accepting the difficult duty, though it went against her will. She had promised herself that she would be the one to end it, but before doing so, she resolved to try one last time to reason with him before taking his life away.
However, time was not on their side. A perfect opportunity presented itself, and Levi seized it, taking on the duty himself. He knew she wouldn't be capable of carrying it out—she would hesitate, and there was no room for hesitation when the world was on the brink of destruction. Levi had endured enough of Eren's actions, witnessing the deaths of comrades, innocent civilians, and children, all victims of Eren's distorted notion of freedom that bordered on insanity. Determined to put an end to it all, Levi took on the responsibility.
Without a shred of remorse, Levi aimed for Eren's head and struck without hesitation. In that pivotal moment, he understood that his actions would bring an end to the chaos but would forever tarnish his relationship with her. Despite hearing her agonized screams in the distance, echoing like the cries of someone facing impending death, he remained resolute. He knew she would need a great amount of time to grieve her loss, to come to terms with the harsh reality of their world and the difficult decisions they were forced to make in order to save humanity. He firmly believed that she would eventually come to understand that this decision was necessary.
She never did and she never forgave him.
7 years later, present.
The early morning summer fragrance teased her senses and the sun tenderly kissed her skin, a comforting warmth to her soul, a sensation she never tired of. Mikasa had made her way to Eren's grave, seeking solace in the peaceful presence of his memory. On this particular occasion, instead of flowers, she brought only her thoughts and her questions, laying them bare before his tranquil resting place.
"You despised being confined like a caged bird, yet here I am, keeping you trapped within the confines of my heart, unwilling to let you go," she lamented, her voice tinged with sadness. His absence weighed heavily upon her heart every day, his spirit a constant presence in the quiet corners of her mind. She gently held her scarf closer to her mouth; even in the middle of the summer, she kept wearing it, the last physical tie to him.
"Or maybe that's what you secretly wanted?" A wistful smile graced her lips as she pondered the what-ifs, contemplating how three simple words left unspoken could have altered the course of their fate. If only she had found the courage to say those three simple words that lingered on the edge of her tongue that fateful night.
"Can I finally set you free?"
The only response was the gentle rustle of leaves in the breeze, a comforting murmur in the background. How she loved this tree, brimming with distant memories, but she couldn't shake the feeling that it grew somewhat somber, perhaps not entirely content to be the resting place of the last remnants of the man who had nearly caused the destruction of all humanity.
No answer was needed.
With a steady breath, Mikasa rose from her place by the grave, feeling lighter somehow. The questions she had carried with her were no longer burdens to bear, their weight lifted from her shoulders like a heavy fog dissipating in the morning sun. As she walked away, the gentle rustle of leaves seemed to whisper words of reassurance, guiding her towards a path of healing and acceptance. With each step, she felt a newfound sense of clarity and purpose, knowing that she had already taken the first steps towards finding the peace she so desperately sought.
Later in the afternoon.
This wasn't merely a choice; it was a conscious decision with no turning back.
As she meticulously packed her belongings, a mix of excitement and apprehension danced through her veins. It was disorienting, yet strangely invigorating. It was a feeling she hadn't experienced in a long time.
Amidst the gathering of her belongings, her eyes fell upon the once-vibrant red scarf she had delicately set aside during the sorting process—a scarf now weathered and worn, much like the chapters of her past she was preparing to leave behind. With a bittersweet tug at her heart, she reached for it, tracing her fingers along its frayed edges. Holding it close, she breathed in deeply, as if trying to capture the essence of all the moments it had witnessed one last time—a final farewell to the ghosts of yesterday. The winds of change were blowing.
With a flick of her wrist, Mikasa tossed the scarf into the trash, a symbolic gesture of shedding the remnants of a bond she no longer wished to be defined by. Closure and liberation flooded her as she watched the scarf land with a soft thud among the waste.
"You ready?" Liah's voice snapped her back to the present.
"Just the trash left to dispose of. You're sure about coming with me?" Mikasa asked, turning to face her friend.
"Wouldn't miss it for the world," Liah exclaimed enthusiastically.
Having double-checked her backpack to ensure everything she needed was inside and after securing the house, it was time to depart. She pulled out a letter sealed with a red wax stamp, 'ERWIN SMITH' written on the back. Mikasa held it for a moment, absorbing its significance. This letter was her driving force, the catalyst for everything to come, before tucking it back into her backpack. Standing up a bit too quickly, she felt the ground sway beneath her, prompting her to remind herself to take it easy. Just like her friend, her excitement was reaching new heights.
Loaded, the two women embarked on their adventure, one that held the promise of positive transformations.
Letting go is a deliberate process, yet it doesn't always erase the past. Instead, we often redirect our focus toward new pursuits which may lead to either the best or the worst outcomes. For Mikasa, there was already someone occupying her thoughts: Levi Ackerman.
The man who ignored her desperate plea for one final chance to reason with Eren, to pull him back from the edge, leaving her haunted by the lingering thought of what might have been—an opportunity she fervently believed could have altered the trajectory of The Rumbling, despite the skepticism of many who argued it would have made no difference. How would they ever know, when he didn't allow her to try?
Mikasa held onto the belief that Levi Ackerman's time would come, and he would inevitably face the consequences of his actions, sooner or later. It was a truth she clung to, a silent promise she made to herself years ago.
Earlier that morning.
Levi opened the door to Erwin's office, with more force than necessary, annoyance etched on his face. He strode across the room and dropped into the chair opposite Erwin's desk without bothering to wait for an invitation, "I hope you have a good reason for dragging me in here," he remarked sharply.
Erwin arched an eyebrow, "Try not to take it out on the door next time," he quipped dryly, his arms folding across his chest.
"Your dusty old office isn't exactly my idea of a good time," Levi retorted snarkily, keen to wrap up a conversation that hadn't even begun.
"Let her rebuild her life without you interfering in it," Erwin stated his expression serious, determined to halt the Ackerman feud once and for all.
Levi leaned back in his chair, feeling a sense of discomfort. "Who?" he asked, though he already had a feeling he knew the answer.
"Mikasa," Erwin confirmed, leaving no room for doubt. "Consider it an order."
"Out of nowhere? Can you at least clue me in, considering it's an order?" Levi pressed, his confusion apparent.
"There's nothing I can add that you don't already know."
Levi's jaw tightened, suspicion and irritation bubbling up, "Are you siding with her?"
Erwin's response was firm. "None of that."
"You are referring to the same person who hunted me down for months and attempted to kill me more times than I can count," he shot back.
"Used to," the blond man stressed, "I understand your frustration," he continued, smoothly dodging his friend's accusatory tone, "but someone has to rise above it all, and I'm counting on you to be that person. "
Levi grumbled. "There is something else you are not telling me."
"You're right, you will know in due time," he admitted. "I want the best for both of you. She is not a threat. It's been five years."
"I see. That big head of yours finally unlocked those hidden psychic abilities and peeked into her thoughts to confirm it." Levi fired back, sarcastically.
"If you're serious about your relationship with Reen, then you have another reason to keep your distance from Mikasa," he mentioned casually, shuffling paperwork on his desk. "Trust me, you wouldn't want any misunderstandings."
"I get it," he snapped, the mention of his ex-girlfriend's name striking a nerve. "I'll step back."
5 years ago, a few months after The Rumbling.
Mikasa remained elusive, her whereabouts shrouded in mystery, haunting Levi's mind whenever he questioned where she might be, until the day she resurfaced, standing boldly before him. He always knew this day would come and was fully prepared for it. She cornered him in a desolate street, clutching a knife tightly in her hand as her sole weapon, and with a primal roar, she charged at him.
Levi stood his ground, heart tightened as she closed the distance between them. The world seemed to blur around them, leaving just the two of them in a suspended moment. He longed to hold her close and tight, offer her the comfort she so desperately needed, reassure and whisper soothing words. Let her know he understood her pain because it was his too, that they didn't have to hurt each other. There had to be a better way to heal and move forward. Together. But his words failed him, caught in his throat. All he could do was stand there, silently praying that she'd see everything he couldn't say in his eyes and come back to her senses.
It was almost effortless to contain her, like a routine exercise. He was familiar with her techniques, having been the one to teach her how to wield a knife with precision at a close range. The memory of her eyes, once bright with a captivating gray sparkle were no longer windows to her soul, but dark voids consumed by an insatiable thirst for killing.
Whenever she found herself at a disadvantage, she chose retreat, vanishing into the shadows like a frightened creature. Each time she slipped away it was because he let her, intrigued by the lengths she would go to in her relentless pursuit of vengeance.
For three grueling months, he remained on constant alert, each new sporadic attempt on his life more desperate and dangerous than the last, pushing him to his limits. She had become completely detached from reality. Despite her friends' sincere efforts to reason with her and plead for her to stop, she remained unfazed. Eventually, it became evident that decisive action was necessary. She posed a threat not only to him and those around him but also to herself. It was only a matter of time before the military police traced her movements and apprehended her.
Everything spiraled out of control in the blink of an eye. It was almost a miracle that she held onto life after that bullet tore through her back as she tried to escape. The sight was heart-wrenching— fragile, ghostly pale, and in agony, barely recognizable. Like a bird knocked from the sky, she crashed to the ground, her wings now broken. Though he knew he played a part in her downfall and should've felt sorry for her, he couldn't bring himself to. That was the legacy of Mikasa Ackerman. That's how she chose to go down in history.
Following that fateful day, she endured several months of confinement within four white walls, drifting aimlessly, in her own desolation, her senses dulled by medication. Levi's footsteps echoed softly in the hallway as they approached the door to her room. Each step felt heavier than the last and his visit, simultaneously the first and the last, knew would serve as a cruel confirmation of her declining condition. But it didn't matter; he was prepared to cross that door. For him, it meant deliverance and for her peace of mind, knowing that once he entered, there would be no turning back.
"Mikasa, I'm finally here."
3 years after The Rumbling.
Mikasa had spent one year already in her new home, far away from the confined walls of prison and hospitals. Instructed to lead a quiet life, she refrained from making another move against him—not out of a lack of will, but because she felt powerless to do so. Paradis wasn't quite the paradise she dreamed of as well. Life held little meaning without her two dearest people around, yet that cursed scarf he despised still clung to her neck like a shackle.
Despite a slight improvement in her health, the spark in her face remained absent. She was alive, but it was a muted existence. During this time, Liah emerged unexpectedly as a pillar of support, her friendship with Mikasa growing stronger with each passing day—a connection he never foresaw, yet one that stirred feelings of betrayal when Liah chose to cut ties with him due to his ill feelings for Mikasa.
Each encounter with Mikasa, whether accidental or intentional became a battleground of silence and avoidance. She'd lower her gaze, her eyes fixed on the ground and her lips sealed shut. No matter how cutting or cruel his words were; she wouldn't budge. Part of him wanted to let her be, but another part couldn't resist poking at her wounds, hoping for some sign of life, yearning to reignite the fire that once burned in her eyes. Their interactions evolved into a twisted dance of power and pain, each step forward met with a matching retreat. Though he made it explicitly clear that he would never physically harm her, his words morphed into a weapon, and viewed his actions as a form of retribution for the torment she had inflicted upon him during those long three months—a small repayment compared to the stress, headaches, and sleepless nights she had caused him.
Not only for that but also for her failure to pull that trigger, a missed opportunity that could have alleviated her pain significantly.
4 years after The Rumbling.
Levi's life had taken a drastic turn as well; he had left behind his military days, turning back on the regimented routines and strict hierarchies of the military, immersing himself instead in the civilian effort to rebuild Paradis. Fueled by new technology and collective determination, the island nation underwent a remarkable transformation, rising from the ashes of destruction within a mere four years. Yet, amidst hope and progress, Levi found himself battling with an unwelcome discomfort: being hailed as a hero for stopping The Rumbling and saving the world. He was no hero; he was just a soldier who had done what was necessary.
Levi's internal turmoils intensified and a suffocating sense of emptiness and loneliness crept into his life. Seeking comfort, Levi turned to alcohol which served as a glaring signal that all was not well. Despite knowing that alcohol was a troubling refuge, he needed something to numb the pain of his traumas. The burden of being humanity's strongest soldier felt like a cruel joke, weighing heavily on him, haunted by nightmares and memories of fallen comrades.
Mikasa introduced another layer to his struggles. He found himself wrestling with his stance and emotions towards her, acknowledging that they originated from a depth he had never before explored, or perhaps intentionally avoided. Unbeknownst to him, he realized that his feelings for her were not merely fleeting fantasies to momentarily escape reality. They were genuine and profound long before he could bring himself to admit it.
She dreamed of a world by Eren's side where she could be free. Levi shared the same dream, too, but with her. She was the kind of woman you fall for once and can never bring yourself to forget. He had never imagined stumbling upon her, yet she found her way to him, inexplicably shaking his world to its core, only to leave him adrift without her. It often crossed his mind that he must have done something good in this life for his daydreams to materialize into reality right before his eyes. It was inexplicable how she entered his life and how a simple exchange of glances saved him. Equally inexplicable was how the notion of love finally found its way to him, despite his sworn belief that there was no place for it in his heart. Yet there she was, defying all logic and filling his world with emotion, making him question everything he thought he knew about himself and his capacity for love.
But those feelings didn't linger for too long. The journey from genuine respect, admiration, and affection to bitter disillusionment and resentment is a cruel twist of fate, especially when it's met by betrayal and selfishness. Mikasa's actions not only shattered the trust Levi had placed in her but also crushed any hopes of a shared future together he had secretly nurtured, leaving behind a wound that refused to heal.
Distracting himself with other women became a habit he fell into—a temporary solution to his loneliness and longing. Initially pleasurable and offering a brief escape, it quickly became a source of dissatisfaction. The women he met always sought something more serious, desiring more than he was willing to give, despite his upfront preference for casual flings. For him, it was purely about sex—a way to avoid the vulnerability and responsibility of a relationship. Their expectations clashed with his selfish desires, intensifying his frustration and ultimately leading to him regretting those adventures.
What exacerbated the situation and fueled his anger was overhearing snippets of conversations left and right—women openly boasting about their time with him. Their casual disregard for his privacy and gossiping about his personal life felt like the ultimate punch to the gut. Adding to the chaos, he heard about a major face-off between two women he'd been with at different times, with one bluntly warning the other to stay away from him.
Nothing seemed to go smoothly, echoing Hange's frank remark, "You can't even enjoy sex in peace."
Hange advised him that the best approach was to settle down and commit to a relationship. She emphasized that finding someone could fill the void in his life and provide stability. At thirty-four, she believed it was the perfect time to consider starting a family, especially now that the world was no longer threatened by Titans. Still, he wasn't interested.
Levi eventually found himself back in the military, not out of choice but out of necessity. Hange's persistence had finally convinced him to return.
Slowly but surely, he also began to let go of the bottles of alcohol, replacing them with the comforting familiarity of tea he had always relied on.
As soon as the tea was back everything seemed to fall back into place. Finally.
And so, fate brought him to Reen—a fellow soldier, in her early thirties, whom he met at work. He vividly remembers their first conversation, sparked by her persistent efforts to engage him in a discussion, and eventually gave in when he realized she wouldn't give up. With her short blonde hair framing her face, she possessed striking brown eyes that were notably large and expressive. A small mole near her left eye added a unique charm to her features. Her fearlessness in carrying herself reflected the disciplined upbringing of a military family, being the daughter of a high-ranking military chief, which earned her even greater respect within the ranks. She quickly made it very clear that she desired more than just a professional relationship with him.
Reflecting on Hange's advice about settling down, Levi decided to give it a try. At first, everything seemed promising, but as time passed, their relationship became more turbulent. He had warned her from the start that he wasn't exactly the romantic type, so there were more downs than ups. Strangely, he found himself unfazed by the tumultuous nature of their relationship. Whether things worked out one day or fell apart the next, it didn't matter. They would patch things up and get back together, though it was she who usually did the patching up, not him.
Levi couldn't quite label his feelings for Reen as love, at least not yet. Sure, he liked her, but love? That's a big word. Perhaps, someday, he might grow to love her, but for now, he liked her enough to stick around. It might sound a little harsh, but that was the truth, and she knew exactly who she was dealing with. He had laid all his cards on the table from the start.
Their relationship fell into a predictable pattern of breakups. Every two weeks, a major argument would erupt, often resulting in a smashed door from her or Levi storming out for a drink to calm his nerves. Reen's possessiveness and insecurity were always the main culprits.
But there was more to it. Over time, Levi felt that they were drifting apart, no longer sharing the same values in life. Their relationship had reached a point where they each wanted different things. While Levi preferred to take it easy, living day by day, Reen was already making plans for the future. The topic of marriage and kids had caused numerous arguments between them, as Levi consistently avoided discussing it.
5 years after The Rumbling, present.
The most recent argument happened two weeks ago and became the final straw, prompting Levi to end things for good a few days before attending the wedding of one of his comrades. It was during that event he tripped over Mikasa once again. He spent that night in a corner sipping glass after glass of whiskey and sparking a flood of "what ifs" in his mind. How different would his life be if he had been with Mikasa instead of Reen?
They wouldn't have lasted a day.
He was getting ahead of himself. Mikasa had never shown any signs of seeing him as anything more than her Captain. There was never a hint of interest from her side; her eyes were solely on Eren.
The Mikasa he fell for was part of the past and no longer existed.
That night is still vividly imprinted in his mind and wedding or not, that didn't stop him from being the walking nightmare in her life and fulfilling his task of watching her crumble under his words. Except for that night, his words held a bit too much truth, and going for her jugular, tasting her sweet scent wasn't premeditated either.
Acknowledging the truth in Erwin's words was a bitter pill to swallow, but Levi knew it was time to take a step back. He had been contemplating it since the wedding incident, a week ago. It was time to reassess his situation and shift his focus to what really mattered instead of wasting time and energy on her.
Erwin leaned forward, his arms crossed on the table, "Alright, then. I need you to get prepared. In six months, the higher-ups want a new Military division focused on recruiting new trainees."
Levi raised an eyebrow, "What's the deal with this sudden move?"
Erwin's response was cryptic, "I can't divulge all the details, but let's just say it's always wise to be cautious and prepared. We need to prioritize our security. Our current resources are insufficient in terms of both numbers and training. The titan threat may be out of sight, but the human threat isn't."
Levi, ever the pragmatist, quipped, "Let me guess, I'll be babysitting?"
Erwin's smirk confirmed Levi's suspicion, "Yes, and you'll be joined by some familiar faces to assist you. We'll be having a meeting with Hange soon to discuss our plan of action."
Erwin's words evoked a sense of nostalgia, reminding them of the camaraderie and shared purpose from the past. Levi wasn't sure if he missed it, but at least it would keep him occupied.
Once he left the office, he stepped outside to clear his head. Finding a secluded corner, he lit up a cigarette. Leaning his head against the wall, he took a drag, letting the smoke fill his lungs before exhaling slowly, attempting in vain to push away that memory...
5 years ago
.
.
"Mikasa, I'm finally here."
She lay almost motionless on the bed, her breath barely perceptible, her once vibrant hair now fell out in clumps, dark circles haunting the hollows beneath her lifeless eyes.
"Rumor has it you're nothing more than a corpse, breathing only out of habit," Levi's voice dripped as he surveyed her pitiful state.
"Look at you," he sneered, knowing she could hear him even though her eyes were vacant.
He leaned in closer, "You can't even hold a conversation anymore. How boring for me to simply monologue at you."
With a twisted smirk, Levi retrieved a bottle of wine from his coat, "I brought this today. It's your 20th birthday," he declared, "I thought we could celebrate together, you lying in your bed, digging your own grave deeper with each passing day. So, here's to life and the living," he taunted, pouring her a glass despite her inability to hold it.
"I used to despise alcohol," Levi continued, his voice low, "Now, I find it quite enjoyable. Especially when I get to savor it in your presence," he laughed, placing the glass in her limp hand, only to watch it spill onto the sheets below.
"You can't even manage to hold a glass," he scoffed, eyeing the wine stains on the bed sheets. "Is this what it's come to for Mikasa Ackerman? Lying in bed, waiting for death to claim you?"
Levi's eyes narrowed as he caught fragments of her murmurs, "What was that?" he asked, leaning in closer again to catch her words, "Finally putting that mouth to use?"
"...kill..." her voice was barely a whisper, but it carried a deadly intent.
Levi's smirk widened, "Look at you, now you're talking," he remarked, with amusement, "Your true nature is finally manifesting."
Levi revealed a gun he had concealed, dangling it provocatively within her view, "It's your lucky day."
"Do it," he dared her, thrusting the weapon toward her trembling hands.
"Reach for it," he urged, his voice menacing. "Don't let those shaky hands miss this once-in-a-lifetime chance."
She reached out, her fingers shaking uncontrollably as she struggled to grasp the firearm. But her weakened state betrayed her; she could barely lift her hand before it fell limply onto the bed, the gun slipping from her grasp.
"That's it?"
"Try again."
He watched with a cruel and twisted fascination as she struggled, "I'll help you place it in your hand. Loaded and ready to use."
Levi's lips curled into a sinister smile, "Now aim and pull the trigger, it's the easiest and fastest way to kill," he said, his tone chillingly calm."
'"One second you are alive and the next one battling death."
"Do it."
"You've been itching for this, so make sure to look me in the eye."
"Mikasa, pull the damn trigger and set me free from this view already."