A/N:
Hi! New chapter.
Thank you so much to everyone who's been reading/interacting with this fic. I hope you continue to enjoy it :)
Eternal gratitude and appreciation goes towards BingBong, who helped me edit this chapter in the middle of his exam period. A true warrior indeed.
Harry stood on the platform at Hogsmeade Station, waving goodbye to his friends as they took the train home for the winter holidays.
He had a wonderful time at the Yule Ball the previous night with Astoria, and was quite pleased (and rather surprised) that he hadn't woken up to see his name once again on the front page of the Daily Prophet.
Ron and Hermione had wanted to stay at Hogwarts over the holidays to help him prepare for the second task, but he had convinced them to go home to their families, and promised to try to figure out the egg's clue on his own. Really, Harry had known they only wanted to stay in order to keep him company, even though he insisted time and time again that he was perfectly happy to be alone for a couple of weeks.
Harry was actually quite looking forward to his two weeks off, and he had already gotten permission from his head of house to use the floo network for a day trip to the Greengrass manor that weekend. He was surprised he didn't need a permission slip from the Dursley's for that, but McGonagall didn't ask him for one, and he wasn't about to mention it.
Harry returned to his otherwise empty dorm in Gryffindor Tower and threw himself onto his bed. He took one look at the golden egg still sitting on his bedside table, decided that he still had enough time before the second task, and took out a book instead. He would try to figure out the egg's clue; he had promised Hermione, after all. But not today. It was still only his first day off! And the egg was really loud.
Two weeks, huh? Harry thought as he opened one of the novels that he had put inside the magical tome Astoria had gotten him for Christmas. That's enough time to finish maybe, five books? I'll also practice some of the magic in the Marauder's spellbook, and try to figure out the egg's clue, er, eventually… Sounds like a pretty good plan to me!
Content with his plan, Harry started reading.
A few hours later his plan was shattered into oblivion as there was a knock at his door, and Professor McGonagall stepped inside.
"Mr. Potter, I'm afraid you'll have to come with me," she said grimly. "You're needed at the front gates."
Harry looked up from his book, and took in the woman's stony expression. She seemed mad, but not particularly at him. That can't be good, he thought.
"Of course, Professor. But, um, is there a problem?"
She gave him a sympathetic look, and sighed.
"It's your Aunt and Uncle, Harry. They're here, and they want to take you home."
Vernon Dursley shook a pudgy finger in Hagrid's direction. It was likely meant to be a threatening gesture, but the Hogwarts groundskeeper towered over him to such an extent he just looked like a petulant child.
"I'm warning you!" Vernon yelled, spittle flying from his mouth. "You bring me back to London this instant or I'll sue this entire school into bankruptcy!"
Hagrid crossed his arms and glared at the man. There were very few things that got Hagrid mad, but ever since meeting the family a few years ago and witnessing first-hand how they treated Harry, the Dursleys were one of those things.
"I'd be more than happy ter take yeh back right now," Hagrid said a little hotly. "If yeh would jus' follow me-"
"I'm not going anywhere until you bring me the boy!"
Harry and McGonagall descended the stairs and took in the scene before them. Vernon was in a heated argument with Hagrid, while Petunia stood a few steps back with her arms around Dudley, who looked like he wanted to run away.
"There he is!" Vernon shouted once he saw Harry. "You're coming with us, boy!"
Harry wasn't afraid of his uncle – not inside of Hogwarts, anyway. Ignoring him, he turned to Hagrid.
"Why are they here?" Harry asked, genuinely unnerved. Seeing the Dursleys at Hogwarts was such an abrasive clash of his two worlds that he felt like he might get whiplash.
"Well," Hagrid began, "they were at the train station in London, said they were expecting yeh. When I told 'em yeh were stayin' at Hogwarts like usual, they demanded ter come."
Vernon's face got red with anger, and he shook with rage as he spoke. "We never wanted to come here! I asked you to bring me the boy, and the next thing we knew we were getting whisked off-"
McGonagall, sensing no more productivity would come from this squabble, decided to cut in.
"Excuse me, Mr. Dursley," she said, politely but rather severely. "May I ask why we didn't receive a letter requesting Harry's return to your household for the holidays this year?"
Vernon turned to her and scoffed. "Send a letter to you freaks? I think not! I'm here to collect the boy, and now that he's here, I'd like to be on my way!"
They've never asked me to come back before, Harry thought. What could they possibly want with me?
Professor McGonagall frowned, clearly thinking along the same lines as Harry. "And why do you want Harry to return with you this year?"
"Does it matter?" Vernon asked impatiently. "I'm his guardian! You thrust the boy on my doorstep every year without a care, and now that I'm here to pick him up - something well within my rights - you refuse me?"
McGonagall's frown deepened. She knew what the Dursleys were like, and had no desire to see Harry spend any more time with them than he had to. On the other hand, she could hardly refuse his legal guardian's request to bring him home over the holidays.
Turning to Harry, who still looked quite stunned, she sighed. "I'm sorry Harry. But this situation is out of our hands; you'll have to return to London with your relatives."
Harry nodded his head, too puzzled to be upset. "I understand."
She patted him on the shoulder. "I'll send someone to check up on you later," she said softly.
Harry and the Dursleys followed an agitated Hagrid through the school and to the emergency portkey located in the headmaster's office. Dumbledore himself wasn't present, but his animal companion, the phoenix Fawkes, was.
Vernon and Petunia gave the large bird a wary glance, and Dudley looked at it with a hungry expression.
It's so surreal to see the Dursleys in Dumbledore's office, Harry thought. And what's wrong with Dudley?
Dudley Dursley was staring at Fawkes, and by the looks of it, was straining against Petunia's hold to run to him. Eventually, Vernon grabbed the boy's arm and pulled him over to the portkey.
"This is it I suppose," Hagrid said to Harry as they stood around the enchanted toy train that served as their transportation back to London. "I'll have Hedwig an' the rest o' your stuff sent over later."
Vernon scowled. "Don't you dare send that bloody bird to our house! Hedwig can stay at the Hogwarts owlery for a couple weeks."
Hagrid scoffed in a derisive way that Harry had never heard from the otherwise tolerant man before. "Good! I didn' want ter send her anyway! Reckon she'll be a whole lot safer here than with you lot."
Turning to Harry, Hagrid spoke softer, his voice concerned. "Yeh sure everything'll be alright with 'em?"
Harry shrugged. "I guess so… I spend every summer with them after all, what's another two weeks?"
In reality, Harry was a bit more concerned. He wasn't sure why the Dursleys wanted him back for the holidays, but he was sure it wasn't for some extra family bonding time. Realistically, it probably wasn't anything more nefarious than using him as a source of free labor to fix the roof or paint the garage, but he couldn't be sure.
"Come boy!" Vernon shouted. "Touch the portkey. We've wasted enough time here already!"
Vernon grabbed Harry's hand and placed it on the toy train, while Petunia did the same with Dudley. In a swirl of color and magic, they were gone.
Hagrid was left alone in Dumbledore's office, feeling confused but not being able to place the source exactly. Something about the Dursleys seemed not quite right…
Hagrid shrugged off the feeling. I'll never be able ter understand 'em I guess. Probably fer the better that I don't. I hope they don't give Harry too hard a time though…
Harry sat in the backseat of a car that must have been new, as it wasn't the one he was used to seeing in the Dursley's driveway.
Does Vernon always drive this badly? He thought as the car swerved rather uncomfortably.
None of them had spoken since arriving at the platform in King's Cross Station, and Harry was starting to get the feeling that something much weirder was afoot than he first thought. If nothing else, the fact that Harry was sitting next to Dudley without being verbally or physically abused was a pretty good sign that something was wrong.
Turning to his cousin, Harry was startled to see the boy staring at him wide eyed, totally silent but with his mouth hanging open. "Uh, Dudley?"
Dudley continued staring at him, and started to drool a bit on the seat. Harry was equal parts disgusted and concerned.
"Are you okay?" Harry asked.
"Woof!"
Huh. Did Dudley just bark at him?
"Woof! Woof!"
Yup. Dudey definitely just barked at him.
Harry was about to ask Vernon to pull the car over to a clinic and get Dudley checked out when the boy leaned over in the seat and licked Harry on the face.
"Oh my god!" shouted Harry, totally repulsed. "Dudley, did you just lick me-"
His words were lost as he watched his cousin's hair slowly change color to a light honey blonde. Then the rest of his body grew similarly colored fur, and his face changed shape, narrowing and elongating into something bestial. Finally, the boy shrunk down so small that his form was hidden entirely by the now oversized clothes, his presence made known only by the shuffling of something beneath the fabric.
"Woof!"
A head poked out from underneath the pile, and in his cousin's stead now sat an adorable little puppy.
Harry felt the panic begin to set in as he realized he wasn't actually in a car with his muggle relatives at all – he had been kidnapped! Fumbling for his wand, he whipped his head around to see who was really driving the car.
"Hi Harry!" said Sirius from the front seat, making eye contact with his godson through the rear-view mirror. "Technically I'm still a widely known and highly wanted criminal, and the Polyjuice wore off a little sooner than I was expecting, so we're going to have to speed things up a bit!"
Harry looked at his godfather, totally baffled. "Wha-"
His words were cut off as his stomach lurched and the car jerked forwards, accelerating into a sprightly tear through the streets of London.
"So let me get this straight," Harry said once they had arrived at 12 Grimmauld Place and were safely under the protection of its numerous wards, runes, and enchantments. "You went to Surrey to steal hair from my relatives and then used Polyjuice Potion to abduct me from Hogwarts?"
"There were a few other steps, but pretty much!"
Harry was sitting down on a chair in the living room with a glass of water, trying to recover from the surprise of the day's events and his godfather's awful driving. Sirius smiled at Harry like he hadn't done anything wrong, and Kreacher looked exasperated, making his own thoughts on his master's plan clear.
The puppy just sat there licking himself.
Harry sighed. "Not that I'm not happy to be here, but isn't that a massive security flaw for Hogwarts? I mean, they basically forced me to go along with a group of people that weren't even my relatives, just because they looked like them. And this is knowing that a potion exists in the magical world that's within the brewing capabilities of a talented second year girl, which allows anyone to look like anyone else as long as they're in possession of some of their hair."
"Yeah," agreed Sirius. "It's definitely not a good look for the school. But still, I'm sure they would've caught on to us if we weren't playing our parts so well."
Harry had to admit, Sirius' Vernon impression was pretty good; there must have been some 'covert observation' done over the past week to replicate the man's mannerisms so authentically.
"So you just lied to McGonagall and Hagrid?" Harry asked.
"Obviously."
"Hagrid seemed pretty upset…"
Sirius winced guiltily. "Yeah, I feel a bit bad about that – I might have to send him an apology note later. But still, I think he was mostly mad at himself; it was him who first brought you to the Dursley's all those years ago, and he probably blames himself for the way they treated you."
"I've never really thought about it like that," Harry admitted.
"And you shouldn't. But I'm sure it was still in the back of Hagrid's mind when he saw us today."
After a few more minutes to regain his bearings, Harry got settled properly into his godfather's home.
"You've met once already, but this is Kreacher," Sirius said, gesturing to his house elf. "He's been working with my family for a long time."
Kreacher gave Harry a short bow, which Harry awkwardly returned.
"And this is Max," Sirius pointed at the puppy.
"Woof!"
Harry bent down and gave Max some ear scritches. The puppy looked like it was smiling as it pushed its little head into Harry's hand, and Harry decided he liked the dog much better when he wasn't polyjuiced to look like his cousin Dudley.
Sirius took Harry on a quick tour of the house, showing him the kitchen, bathroom, library, and any other room that might be useful to know about during his time there. While the place definitely had some personality, Harry couldn't help but feel like Sirius and Kreacher were slacking a bit on the cleaning.
"This feels like the flat two bachelor's might share," Harry remarked, stepping over an empty bottle of brandy.
"Well, it basically is," Sirius said. "I haven't spoken to a woman in over fourteen years, and Kreacher is a widower."
Harry turned to Sirius in surprise. "House elves get married?"
"Of course," replied Sirius. "They have kids too – Kreacher has a daughter in France."
"Huh. I feel like we really don't get taught enough about house elves."
Sirius shrugged. "That's the way it's always been."
Harry followed Sirius up to a bedroom on the second floor, which in contrast to the rest of the house appeared to be recently cleaned, with a floral scent in the air and fresh sheets on the bed.
"And here's where you'll be staying for the next couple weeks," Sirius announced. "I'll give you some time to get settled in, but feel free to call me or Kreacher if you need anything."
"Okay," Harry nodded. "I will. And thanks for arranging all of this, Sirius. It means a lot that I'll get the chance to live with you, even if it's just for a short while."
Sirius smiled warmly and patted his godson on the shoulder. "It's the least I could do."
Minerva McGonagall padded down Privet Drive in her animagus cat form.
She had once observed the Dursleys many years ago, and knew that they were muggles of the worst sort. Harry was more than capable as a wizard and could handle his relatives in a worst-case scenario, but she wanted to be there tonight, just to catch a glimpse of their intentions with the boy. After all, it was awfully strange of them to request Harry's return for the holidays out of the blue like that…
McGonagall pounced up to the windowsill and took a peek inside. Vernon and Petunia were sitting on the couch watching some muggle television program, and Dudley was on a tacky upholstered chair eating directly out of a tub of ice cream. Harry was nowhere in sight, which while not particularly suspicious, still gave McGonagall a creeping sense of dread.
She hopped up to the second story window, circled the house, checked the backyard and the garage, and still couldn't find Harry Potter.
Surely he's not back in the cupboard? McGonagall thought, morbidly hopeful that he was actually just in the cupboard.
Finding an unassuming corner of the backyard, she shifted back into her human form.
"Homenum Revelio!" she incanted, pointing her wand directly at the Dursley residence.
Sure enough, her spell detected only three human presences in the house; Vernon, Petunia, and Dursley.
Her worst fears were realized – Harry Potter was missing.
Albus Dumbledore was sitting at his desk reading a letter when McGonagall burst through his doors, looking panicked.
"Albus!" she exclaimed. "We have a problem that needs your attention immediately – it's an emergency!"
Dumbledore sighed, looking up from his letter. "Let me guess, Harry Potter was taken away earlier today by his relatives, but you visited their residence and he is nowhere to be seen."
"What? Why, yes!" McGonagall replied, taken aback. "How did you know?"
Dumbledore lifted the letter in his hand. "I was informed just a few minutes ago myself. By his captor, no less."
"A ransom?" McGonagall asked nervously.
"Not as such," Dumbledore shook his head. "I can't disclose his location at the moment, but rest assured that Harry Potter is safe, and will likewise return safely to Hogwarts at the start of term."
McGonagall tried to order her raucous emotions, sorting out the events of the past day in her head. "But how could it be?" she asked. "Was Potter not picked up by his relatives this afternoon?"
"Not the Dursleys in any case," he replied. "They were in Surrey all day, completely oblivious to the entire ruse."
Minerva's face paled, and Dumbledore nodded gravely. "We got lucky today; Harry is safe, healthy, and probably a great deal happier than he would have otherwise been. But we've learned an important lesson that we'd do best not to forget."
"We've grown complacent," McGonagall affirmed. "The security systems at Hogwarts are severely lacking."
"What's this?" Harry asked, poking at his dinner with his fork suspiciously.
"Orange chicken," Sirius replied. "Trust me, just try it. It'll change your life."
Sirius insisted on celebrating their first day living together with 'Chinese takeout', a concept Harry had read about but never actually experienced. He was enjoying the beef and broccoli, but was otherwise avoiding anything that looked excessively colorful.
"Woah!" Harry said once he took a bite of the chicken.
"I know, right?" Sirius grinned.
"I feel like I'll have to do a cavity search later."
Sirius choked on his food, and took several seconds to recover. "I don't think that means what you think it means," he said eventually.
Harry frowned. "My friend Hermione's parents are dentists, so I know about cavities even if I've never had one."
"Right," said Sirius, looking oddly at him. "Anyway, stay out of trouble, and you won't have to learn about the other kind of 'cavities' the hard way, like I did."
Harry didn't really know what Sirius was talking about, but that was nothing new, so he just shrugged and moved on.
Harry, Sirius, and Kreacher sat eating the rest of their dinner, enjoying a pleasant conversation. Harry saw Kreacher slip more than a fair share of beef strips to Max, who was sitting next to them by the table. Overall, it felt like a family - a real family - and Harry knew that this was exactly what he wanted out of life.
"Any progress with the ministry?" Harry asked hopefully once they had cleared away their dinner.
Sirius sighed. "Nothing much. Remus and Albus are poking around, but my case was locked up pretty tight, and there's only so much they can ask before they start drawing unwanted attention."
Harry wanted Sirius to be free, and he wanted to live here on Grimmauld with him, Kreacher, and Max on a more permanent basis. Unfortunately, the possibility of Sirius ever being exonerated seemed less likely with each passing day.
"What would we need to do?" Harry spoke up after a while. "To prove you're innocent, I mean."
"Capture Pettigrew, I guess. If the public ever finds out that he's still alive, the case would be forced back open, and I'd get a real trial."
And Pettigrew is hiding away somewhere, knowing full well we're on the lookout for him, Harry thought dejectedly.
"Cheer up," Sirius said, noticing his godson's downcast expression. "We have two full weeks together now! Let's make the best of it."
Ultimately, Harry's original plan for the holidays didn't change too much.
He spent his mornings with Sirius, going through the Marauder's spellbook and practicing magic. Despite his modesty about his own skills, Sirius was still an adult wizard with seven years of magical education and decades of practical experience, and there was a lot he could teach a fourth year student.
In the afternoons, Sirius would lecture about esoteric strategic concepts.
"Always outsource your work," Sirius declared one day.
"What do you mean?"
"You're only one person; there's only so much you can do. Whenever possible, delegate labor to others and perform only the most critical jobs yourself."
Harry frowned. "That just sounds like laziness to me."
"Laziness is the mother of invention," Sirius replied, shrugging. "Besides, I'm not telling you to never do any work yourself, just to be aware of when you might be able to get some help with the minutiae."
"That sounds reasonable, I guess…"
Harry wasn't sure what that had to do with getting stronger as a wizard, but he dutifully wrote it down in his notebook anyway.
Before dinner Harry would usually take Max out for a walk around the neighborhood, with Kreacher showing him the routes to take to avoid people. They would all eat dinner together, chat or read in the evening, and then after that, they'd avoid opening the golden egg. Harry opened it once at Sirius' prompting but the wailing from the egg had upset all four of them, especially Max and Kreacher, so they put solving the clue on pause for the time being.
By the time the first weekend came around, it was already one of the best weeks he could ever remember having, and Harry's resolve to live with Sirius one day only strengthened.
Daphne walked across the hall and into her sister's room, where she saw Astoria furiously trying to tidy up her things. There were spells for that, but Astoria wasn't the most…competent witch, and was therefore trying to do it manually.
"I hear Harry is coming over today," Daphne said casually, standing in the doorway.
"Ahh!" Astoria shouted, throwing clothes around the room in a way that did not seem conducive to tidying.
"Would you like some help?" Daphne offered. "For starters, you should try folding your clothes instead of throwing them from one corner to another."
Astoria looked up at her big sister, distress clear on her face. "How do you even fold clothes though!?"
Sighing, Daphne rolled up her sleeves and got down to help.
"You look great!" Sirius said, patting Harry on both shoulders. "The exact boy every parent hopes their daughter brings home!"
Harry was dressed in slacks and a button-down shirt, in his best attempt to look like a nice and respectful boy to Astoria's parents. He thought he was a nice and respectful boy, but the only thing her parents knew about him at the moment was that he kissed their daughter on the front page of the Daily Prophet, so he felt like he was playing from behind.
"And you're sure I shouldn't bring them a present?" Harry asked.
"Nah," Sirius replied. "You're fourteen – anything you bring will just look like it's from your parents, and it's pretentious. Just go there, smile a bunch, and tell them how much you treasure their daughter. You'll do great!"
"If you say so…"
Harry checked himself in the mirror one last time, made a futile attempt to pat down his hair, and gave it up for lost.
"Is Master Harry ready to go to Diagon Alley?" Kreacher asked.
"Ready as I'll ever be," Harry replied.
Kreacher took his hand, and they both disappeared with a snap.
Pinky, proud house elf of the Greengrass family, watched in horror as Astoria tried to bake cookies. The girl had made Pinky promise not to help, so Pinky didn't help.
But Pinky still watched.
And eventually, Pinky could bear it no longer.
"Miss Astoria," Pinky said. "May I help?"
"No! I need to do this by myself!"
"But why all by yourself?" Pinky asked. "We can make the cookies together!"
Astoria sighed, answering while she whisked vinegar into the batter. "Every time we bake together you give me little tasks like 'measure the sugar', but then I do it wrong and you just do it yourself anyway. Then I give up and sit on the floor and you let me know when it's time to decorate, and then I usually just make a mess and eat the icing straight out of the piping bag."
Pinky had nothing to say in response to this – Astoria had summed it up perfectly.
"May I at least mention something crucial?" Pinky asked. She thought Astoria really ought to know she had mixed up the sugar and the salt.
"No! I'm going to make the cookies all by myself, and then Harry is going to try them and be all like 'Oh Astoria your cookies are so good I love you rah rah rah' and then I'll pretend it was easy and that I'm a super good baker."
Pinky sighed as she watched Astoria's batter begin to bubble. Mister Harry will be lucky if he's even able to speak after eating one of those cookies...
Harry fidgeted nervously as he stood on the corner of the street in Diagon Alley, waiting for Astoria to come take him back to her house.
She's running late, Harry thought as he checked the watch Hermione had gotten him. It wasn't the first time he had checked the watch; he checked it every minute that passed since their agreed-upon meeting time, which at the moment, was fifteen and counting.
"Are you Harry Potter?"
He looked up from the watch and towards the figure that had called out to him. Before him stood a handsome middle-aged man that could only be described as huge. Not as big as his friend Hagrid, but definitely closer to seven feet tall than six. Muscles corded his body like a muggle fitness model, visible even through the tailored suit he was wearing.
"Um, yes," Harry replied cautiously.
"Astoria got caught up baking cookies, so I'm here to pick you up instead."
Is he their butler or something? Harry thought as they walked through Diagon Alley together. He knew his girlfriend came from a wealthy family, so it wasn't entirely out of the question, and the man's neutral expression and confident bearing certainly lent him the requisite air.
Or maybe a bodyguard, for that matter?
Harry also considered the possibility that the man had caught wind of his plans with his girlfriend somehow and was trying to kidnap him, but he knew he was just being paranoid since last week's incident. They were walking through Diagon Alley with their identities unconcealed, and Harry couldn't help but feel like if he really was being kidnapped, his would-be captors would have sent a far less conspicuous envoy.
His suspicions were further abated as they continued to walk through the streets and several people gave nods or curt greetings to the man ahead of him. Whoever he was, he was clearly well known and well liked, which was probably a good sign.
Harry almost tripped over the sidewalk as a particularly friendly woman called out to the man.
"Good morning Mr. Greengrass!"
Mr. Greengrass!? Harry thought, bewildered. This can't be Astoria and Daphne's dad, can it? He looks nothing like them!
He took another hard look at 'Mr. Greengrass' and decided that maybe he could see the familial resemblance now that he was looking for it, but it also might've just been in his head.
"Um, excuse me…" Harry spoke up after the woman had passed by. "But are you Astoria's dad?"
The man turned around to look at him squarely. "Ah, my apologies. I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Jacob Greengrass, Astoria and Daphne's father," he said, extending his hand towards Harry.
Harry shook Jacob's hand, and was surprised to find that the massive man was quite gentle, and didn't break every bone in his hand as he had been half-expecting.
"Nice to meet you," Harry replied nervously. "I'm Harry Potter, Astoria's boyfriend."
Jacob nodded and they continued walking. "Astoria has told us a lot about you," he said. "She likes you a great deal…"
Harry scratched his arm uncomfortably. What was he supposed to say to that?
"I like her a lot too," Harry responded, reaching around for words to fill the awkward silence. "Honestly, I think I love her, but I'm only fourteen so I'm not sure if it's too early for me to know for sure…"
Ahh! Why did I say that!? Harry reprimanded himself. Just stop talking!
Harry thought Astoria's dad might take issue with his statement for one reason or another, but instead the muscular man just nodded sagely.
"It's never too early to be in love," he said. "You'll know it's real when it hits you; I fell in love with Astoria's mom when I was eleven."
Harry raised his eyebrows in surprise. "Really? You've been together that long?"
"Not quite," Jacob said, shaking his head. "I declared my love for her in the middle of the sorting ceremony, but she rejected me."
"Oh…"
"I tried to win her affection for the next six years, but she never returned my feelings. Eventually I realized that if I really loved her I'd let her go, and stopped my pursuit in fear of bothering her."
Harry was starting to get really invested in this story. "What happened next?" he asked. "I mean, you got together in the end, right?"
Jacob nodded. "The day after I started leaving her alone she realized she liked me and asked me to be her boyfriend."
Harry froze. "That's it?"
"That's it."
Huh. That's sort of disappointing, but I guess life is like that sometimes…
In any case, Harry was really grateful it didn't take him six years and an emotional epiphany to get together with Astoria.
Anyway, he thought. Astoria's dad seems pretty friendly-
Jacob Greengrass' expression shifted and he look intently at Harry, his amiable attitude from before disappearing. "Do you like flowers?"
Harry gulped. He felt like the answer to this question was more important than he could realize.
"Um, I often tend to the garden at my Aunt and Uncle's house. I suppose I'd say that generally I like them…?"
Jacob nodded. "What about ice cream?"
Harry had to force down his instinct to make some sort of loud exclamation. What do these questions have to do with anything, and why does he look so intense?
"I like it," Harry said hesitantly. "I think most people do…"
Jacob nodded again, and his stern expression cleared up.
"Astoria chose well with you, Harry," he said, a bittersweet smile forming on his handsome face. "Welcome to the family."
Harry Potter and Jacob Greengrass entered the Greengrass family manor engaged in a lively conversation. They were joking and laughing, and an outside observer might think they had been friends for years. Linda Greengrass knew better, and she narrowed her eyes as her husband and her youngest daughter's boyfriend stumbled out of the floo network and into the foyer.
Jacob Greengrass may have been the talent behind the Greengrass Herbology empire, but she was the brains that turned his little family flower shop into the multinational conglomerate it is today. Her husband was simply too trusting, and she knew it would be her duty and not his to determine if their daughter's chosen boyfriend was worthy.
"We're home!" Jacob called, his words echoing through the expansive house.
Linda emerged from where she was waiting behind a door, making it look casual. "I trust you had no trouble on your way here?"
"None at all!" Jacob replied. "We were just delayed a bit because we stopped for ice cream."
She resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Only Jacob would stop for ice cream in the middle of picking up their daughter's first boyfriend. She adored her husband, but his love for ice cream knew no bounds when it really should, and that love had rubbed off on Daphne in a bad way, who was now just as much of an ice cream fiend as he was.
Linda strolled up to the pair, gave her husband a quick kiss on the cheek in greeting, and extended her hand towards Harry. "It's nice to finally meet you, Harry," she said.
He shook the proffered hand firmly. "It's nice to meet you Miss Greengrass."
Linda narrowed her eyes. Good, she thought. He passed the first test.
She simply hated it when men kissed her hand upon being introduced to her. It was a chauvinistic tradition of bygone times when women weren't seen as equals, and by offering her hand to Harry and letting him choose how to handle it, she was able to uncover a small part of his personality.
Wow, she's scary! Harry thought. I see where Daphne got her glare from.
"Hi Harry! Welcome to my house!"
Harry turned to look in the direction the voice had come from, and saw Astoria come around the corner, oven mitts still on her hands. She gave him a hug and a kiss, which embarrassed Harry tremendously considering it was in front of her parents, and smiled up at him.
"Sorry I couldn't come to get you – I was making cookies."
"Oh, that's okay," Harry blushed. "I had a good time with your dad."
Astoria raised an eyebrow at her dad, who just smiled and gave her a thumbs up.
The group moved as a whole to the kitchen, where a tray of…something, was cooling on the counter. They were vaguely circular, but they were black and very flat, so Harry assumed they weren't the cookies his girlfriend had been making.
"Do you want to try a cookie?" Astoria asked, pointing at the somethings where they sat cooling on the counter.
"Of course!" Harry replied, forcing himself to imbue enthusiasm into his tone. In reality, he was still kind of full from the ice cream, and had no desire to eat the 'cookies' his girlfriend had made, as they looked positively dangerous.
Alas, his girlfriend had made them, and likely made them especially for him as well, so he had no choice.
He picked up a cookie and looked at it warily. He was pretty sure he almost cut his finger on one of its edges. Astoria stared at him expectantly, so taking a deep breath, he bit into it.
The cookie was unlike anything he had ever tasted before. It was so horrifically bad that Harry thought his taste buds might never recover. It was crispy and soggy at the same time, was unequivocally burnt, and tasted strongly of salt and vinegar for some reason. Harry was pretty sure this singular cookie could defeat Lord Voldemort if given the opportunity, and would cause Dementors to flee faster than any Patronus Charm ever could.
"It's great!" he said, trying to smile.
Astoria sighed in relief. "I'm so glad you like them. I got lost halfway through the recipe so I improvised a bit at the end there, and I wasn't sure how they would turn out."
Harry swallowed the alchemical creation, and turned to look at his girlfriend seriously. He was pretty sure if the Ministry of Magic ever found out about Astoria's cookies there would be a new item on the sanctioned goods list.
He simply had to be honest with her.
"Astoria-"
He stopped speaking as he saw the look in her eyes. She was full of nervousness, hope, and a little bit of fear. She was a teenage girl who had just made cookies for her boyfriend to commemorate him visiting her home for the first time, and she wanted everything to go well.
And while his girlfriend's cookies may be an extinction-level threat, they were still his girlfriend's cookies.
"Yes?"
He took another cookie, and tried to turn his brain off while he crunched, chewed, and swallowed. "Your cookies are great. Thank you for making these."
Linda Greengrass had to admit, she was impressed. Even Daphne wouldn't ever eat more than one of Astoria's infamous baked goods, while Harry had managed a whole three. Of course, honesty is important in a relationship, but there's a time and place for those things, and today wasn't it for Harry to tell Astoria just how bad she was at baking.
Not only that, but as Astoria gave him a tour of the house and blabbered on telling him stories from her childhood, he listened earnestly and attentively. Linda was willing to acknowledge that her youngest daughter could be a bit of a handful, and required a great deal of patience to deal with, but Harry seemed to have patience in spades, and never made her feel like she was worth less than she was.
There's just one last test you have to pass, she thought as she secretly watched the two pass by Daphne's room.
"Hi Daphne!" Harry said as the girl emerged from her room to greet them.
"Hi Harry," she replied.
"Have you read any good books so far this break?"
"A few."
"Cool! Maybe we can lend each other some books we've already read when we get back to school? My stash is dwindling."
Daphne sighed. "Maybe."
Linda was shocked. That was it. Harry had passed the final test; gaining Daphne's approval. Not only did Daphne speak to him without cursing him, but she even implied she might possibly lend him one of her precious books!
You chose well Astoria, Linda thought as she returned to the daily tasks that needed her attention. I suppose we'll have to break open a bottle tonight to celebrate. Maybe two bottles – I think Jacob will need it.
"You got abducted by your godfather and now you're living with him in London?" Astoria asked excitedly once they were alone in her room.
"Yeah, pretty much," Harry replied. "It's been a lot of fun."
Harry was rather nervous to be in his girlfriend's room. It smelled like her, and was much cleaner than he had expected from the generally frenetic girl. He tried to prevent himself from being rude and looking around the room too much, but something still caught his eye from her bedside table.
"Is that the sugar quill?" he asked, embarrassed at the reminder of the lame gift he had given Astoria for her last birthday, on the day they first met.
Astoria blushed. "Yeah, it's the sugar quill you gave me in Hogsmeade. I don't have the heart to eat it, since it's the first present you ever gave me."
Harry's heart warmed several degrees. "You kept it after all this time?"
"Of course! I actually want to cast a preserving charm on it, so that I can keep it forever. Or maybe we can eat it on our wedding day, because it'll be like symbolism or whatever?"
Harry's eyebrows shot up. "Our wedding day?" he repeated. "You want to get married?"
Astoria froze. "You mean like right now?"
"No! I think it's a bit soon. But I mean, maybe eventually?"
"Oh, okay," she blushed. "Yeah, I'd like that."
Harry was confused. He had just wanted to ask Astoria what she meant by 'our wedding day', but had apparently ended up proposing instead.
Oh well, he thought. It's not like I'm opposed to the idea…maybe closer to ten years from now though.
They spoke for a couple more hours, going over the events of their respective past weeks and making plans for their return to Hogwarts the week after. At some point they returned to the kitchen and sat around the counter on stools so they could eat snacks and chat a bit more with Astoria's parents, where Harry noted Linda Greengrass was much friendlier than her first impression suggested.
"It was very nice to meet you," Harry said to Jacob and Linda once it had come time for him to leave. "Thanks again for inviting me over."
"Of course," Linda replied. "It was a pleasure having you, Harry."
"Come back anytime!" added Jacob.
Astoria walked Harry down to the manor gates, where he said he would call his house elf to pick him up. "So this is goodbye then?" she asked.
"For another week, I guess."
Astoria pouted. "Will you miss me?"
Harry pretended to think about it. "Maybe a little," he said, holding his thumb and forefinger just a tiny bit apart.
She swatted his arm playfully and gave him a kiss. "See you in a week, Harry."
"See you in a week, Astoria."
She turned to walk back down the path to her house, and Harry called Kreacher.
"Woof!"
Kreacher appeared with a pop, Max on a leash by his side. Clearly, Kreacher had been in the middle of a walk and decided to bring the little dog along with him to pick up Harry.
Naturally, the moment Astoria heard a bark, she spun around and came running back down the path to the gates. "Oh my gosh a puppy!" she yelled, immediately getting on the ground so she could play with him. "You're just the cutest thing ever, if I didn't already have an animal I'd so want to bring you to Hogwarts, you're just a tiny little guy aw look at your little face-"
Kreacher exchanged a glance with Harry, who just shrugged.
After a while, Astoria got up and brushed herself off. "Wow!" she exclaimed with a big smile on her face. "He's adorable! And so well trained too, you guys must take great care of him."
It might've just been his imagination, but Harry could have sworn he noticed Kreacher stand a little straighter after that one.
"Of course," Harry said. "Max is a noble hound, worthy of his position as a noble family's guard dog."
Max wagged his tail cluelessly and Harry was relatively certain Kreacher puffed his chest out a bit.
"Master Harry, we should get going if we want to be back in time for dinner," the house elf said after a moment. "Are you ready to leave?"
"Oh, wait!" Astoria said. "Why don't you bring some cookies home for your godfather?"
Harry was about to make some excuse as to why he couldn't actually bring her weapons of mass destruction into his house, but didn't have the heart to follow through.
"Sure! I bet he'll love that."
"So how'd it go?" Sirius asked Harry once he had returned with Kreacher and Max to 12 Grimmauld Place.
"Great! Her house is really impressive, and her parents are super nice."
Sirius smiled. "I knew they'd love you. Now you just need to bring her over here, so she can meet us properly!"
Max barked.
"Max already met her," Kreacher supplied. "They have become friends."
"Oh yeah, she loved Max," Harry added.
Kreacher nodded. "Kreacher thinks she is a nice girl; a good match for Master Harry."
Sirius frowned. "That's not fair! I want to meet her too…"
"Her parents seem pretty protective," Harry said apologetically. "I don't think they'd be too keen on her meeting a wanted criminal…"
Sirius sighed. "If only the ministry didn't want me dead, I could get the chance to play the whole protective parent act…"
Harry knew where Sirius was coming from, but there was no point thinking about that now.
What there was a point thinking about now was a way for Harry to get back at Sirius for all the times he had teased him over the past week.
"Well Sirius," he smiled. "You may not be able to meet her yet, but she gave us some cookies to bring home. Would you like to try one?"