Chapter 25
7th of October 2007
Jupiter Camp
Mars appeared in the middle of the Camp, ready to congratulate his son and…What the fuck? What the fuck had happened? On his right, he could see some people having sex, while other where sleeping. On his left, the same thing. Just in front of him, one woman was eating out another, and all the others were… Doing nothing, just being naked and doing nothing. Ah, no. Some where clearly doing cocaïne.
Then, he saw Bacchus.
"Ah, Mars!", said Bacchus, while Pluto's daughter was sucking on his balls. Uh. Pretty ballsy.
"What the fuck is happening here?"
"Well, after we finished the quest, we thought we could relax and… Yeah."
The God of war was half amused, half fuming.
"You…Did you just reveal to the whole camp that you were a god?"
He heard gasps.
"What? Dio is a god?"
Annoter added "Oh…It explains so many things…"
"And the god choose the fifth Cohort!?"
Octave passed out. Uh. They would need a new Praetor. Maybe…Frank? Or Hazel, the girl that was still lick…huh, gross. He did not know a mortal could do that with her tongue.
Bacchus smiled.
"Nope! But you just did! So, technically, you are the one to break the Ancient Laws!"
And a Faun started to play the trumpet. Badly.
Mars put his head between his hand. Fuck his life.
Even if his life was interesting : according to his aura, the god of wine was doing a comeback.
22nd of November 2007 - about a month and a half later
Playboy Mansion
Prometheus burst out laughing, tears running down his cheeks, as Dionysus told him the end of the story.
"Nah...You didn't..."
Dionysos took another sip of whisky. He was in his bathrobe and sitting in an armchair right next to the Titan.
"I did...So, as you can well imagine, Zeus - well, Jupiter - summoned us. He was really pissed off, at first. I thought I was going to get at least a decade's worth of punishment, but...The council was pretty well arranged by the situation, and Jupiter was more focused on the giants waking up at the same time as the titans - although at the moment, he seems to be the only one. He sent Diana to check on the others, and apparently all's well. Anyway, with the eagle back - and Jupiter had to thank me for it, the giant slain - also by me - Frank the new praetor - which suits Mars and Neptune - everyone's happy. Except Pluto. But I slept with his daughter. And so did Frank. And so did Jason. And so did Gwen. But it's nothing he should be ashamed of ! He should be proud his daughter has that much game! Fucking patriarcal vision…So I just took a lesser punishment, confinement in my temple for about a month. And yesterday was the last day!";
Prometheus hummed.
"Perfect! I had just finished about a week ago what you asked me to do..."
Dionysus nodded, his gaze settling on the aquarium where the Ophiotaurus swam calmly.
Spoiler: Ophiotaurus
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Labyrinth
Thoas took some popcorn from Icarus's pot.
"Hey! Eat yours!"
Medea
Mini-Boss
Immortal Sorceress
Lvl 176/300
"But Grover already ate them!", he answered.
He watched the fierce battle between Medea, the Princess of Colchis, and Bellatrix, the Queen of Hearts, who had also received a personal growth quest. Medea's eyes blazed with fury as she summoned illusions of mythical creatures that danced and weaved. Undaunted, Bellatrix countered with another spell, sending a relentless storm of enchanted cards, metallic and sharp as knives, slicing through the air.
"Your tricks won't fool the Queen of Hearts!" she taunted, her voice reverberating with confidence. For a reason that eluded Thoas, she was wearing a magical girl outfit. In response, Medea conjured poisonous ephemeral golden butterflies, that stopped all the knives-cards.
Bellatrix's heart-shaped scepter throbbed with dark energy as she warped the very ground into a shifting maze. "Lost in your own illusions, Princess?" she sneered. Wow. Manipulating the Labyrinth? She was become really badass. And the Queen of Hearts took out a book, a strange book with Dionysos sigil written on the cover. With a flick of her wrist, the Queen opened the book, its pages crackling with eldritch energy. Words leapt from the parchment, swirling and coalescing into intricate patterns of power. Uttering forbidden words, she invoked something, a mass made of teeth and eyes and...
You finished a personal growth quest!
Game-induced Awakening !
Bellatrix Black
Magical Girl and Queen of Hearts
Lvl 145/350 → Lvl 168/500
Dungeon Completion Rate : 47%
22th of December 2007
Winter Solstice
Alaska
Trigger Warning : a bit of gore
Orpheus grumbled something about the cold. Pan clutched the Golden Fleece, which he would need to repopulate the flora and fauna of the vast, cold expanses stretching as far as the eye could see before him. Daedalus and Prometheus were talking quietly. The discussion was interrupted when Dionysus appeared before them, the Ophiotaurus' aquarium floating quietly behind him.
"Yo," he greeted his subordinates. He felt...more powerful in his territory. The territory he had conquered, a territory where he was the sole master - unlike the rest of the US. But a territory that did not match at all his…energy. And they were going to remedy to that.
Prometheus cleared his throat. "Well, we can now begin the ritual. A reminder for those who fell asleep at the last meetings..." he glanced at Orpheus.
"Alaska, the last territory that had not been conquered by anyone - through lack of interest, probably - is Dionysos'. We finally have a territory that's truly ours. But it lacks a little...touch of Wildness and magic. So we're going to...fully give control of the territory to Dio, and add one or two little...interesting touches. Let's begin".
And, in the heart of the icy Alaskan wilderness, the mood shifted.
Surrounded by the biting cold, Dionysos, a force of primal might, stood at the center, his eyes ablaze with determination. The Four Kings encircled the Ophiotaurus and started singing.
Dionysos conjured an altar, its entire form shrouded in an inky blackness. With fervor, he seized the Ophiotaurus, and put it on the altar. Then, he started throttling the life from the monstrous creature. The land echoed with the creature's futile gasps as it succumbed to Dionysos's relentless grasp. In a grotesque display, Dionysos tore open the creature's belly. Consuming its entrails with insatiable hunger, he unleashed a primal wave of magic that surged from him, enveloping the desolate territory. The entire landscape quivered as reality itself bent to the arcane energy unleashed by Dionysos.
Amidst the eerie harmony of the Four Kings' chants, Dionysos's frenzied act brought about a transformation. The magical wave swept through the Alaskan expanse. The trees seemed to resonate with an ineffable vitality, as if touched by the unseen magic coursing through the heart of the Alaskan terrain. The creatures of the wilderness ceased their activities, captivated by the elusive whispers carried by the winds.
Beneath the frost-laden earth where the ritual took place, within a concealed cavern, a force of cryptic nature began to stir. A subterranean realm took shape, its dark corridors and hidden alcoves pregnant with the promise of otherworldly inhabitants and veiled secrets.
Delvers, drawn by an unseen allure, would soon be enticed into this mysterious labyrinth, oblivious to the arcane forces that lingered within, yearning to become stronger and freer.
That night, a Dungeon was born.
?
Labyrinth
"Hey! Look!" pointed Hodge, as they passed yet another spot where the texture of the labyrinth changed.
"Huh?"
Congratulations! You have stepped in an already occupied Dungeon!
Everyone looked up, apparently having received the same message.
Error…Recalibrating
"What ?"
Congratulation ! You have linked [The Labyrinth] and [Dionysos Original Dungeon]
You opened the door !
Dionysian energy is seeping in the Labyrinth.
Dionysian energy does not meet any resistance in the part already completed by your party.
Dionysian energy fails to settle in unconquered rooms.
Finish [The Labyrinth] for full take over by Dionysian energies!
2nd of February 2008
US
Thoas whistled as he crossed the video game studio, a file under his arm. This was going to be one of his father's most interesting challenges. A completely innovative universe - he'd been surprised by this "urban fantasy dungeons" concept - integrating video games, films, adventures hidden all over the place in real life and stuff on the Internet?
"Dionysos - The Game I" was the sober title of the first video game, due for release in a few weeks' time. The scenario was as follows: one fine day in the year 2100, mysterious shapes began to appear in cities all over the world. Monsters began to emerge. But, at the same time as the monsters began to appear, men and women - called players or awakened - began to develop mysterious powers that enabled them to fight the monsters and explore the dungeons. The player embodied a F-rank awakened, who one fine day received a strange flask from his father he had never met - a father named Dionysus…
?
Labyrinth
Thoas really, really wasn't lucky. So, looking at the screen floating in the air, he decided to lit another fag.
Sun Wukong
The Monkey King
Lvl 5 877/6 000
"It is a Me! Mario!"
Clearly, it was not Mario. It was a fucking Chinese god - or mythological figure. He did not give a damn anymore. They were in the Labyrinth for what felt like months, and they had met monsters from Nordic mythology, people from Japanese myths and gods from native American mythology. So, Chinese monkey king?
Meh.
Even if he was by far the strongest being he had ever seen. His Father was not even level 3 000!
You came with a challenge, didn't you? For one of us? And if we fail, you'll kill us all? Huh?"
Sun Wukong pouted. Of course. How original…
"Joy flaps...But yep, exactly. And it'll be for you, Thoas."
Fuck.
A girl about Thoas's age materialized next to the Monkey King. She looked at Thoas as if she were starving.
Kavya
Demigod
Daughter of Indra
Lvl 136 / 1 500
Status : horny
"Nothing too complicated...for you, anyway. And at the time. Meet Kavya, Indra's daughter. She desperately wants to get laid, but her poor daddy won't let his little girl bite the forbidden fruit. Bouhohou... You know what you have to do. You're all about rule breaking and hedonism no? But there will be consequences, once he knows! He won't - not before a few years - but after...Eheh"
Fuck.
Literally.
Puzzle elucidated !
Dungeon Completion Rate : 62%
Thoas
Lvl 56/100 → Lvl 67/200
?
Labyrinth
Thoas slew the last of the fucking Cyclops that tied to eat them. Fucking noobs.
Congratulations !
Dungeon Completion Rate : 95%
For the last 5% : find the final Boss and slay it !
?
Labyrinth
[You have entered the Boss Zone]
"Fuck…Run! No way we're fighting that"
[Yay!You found the Final Boss]
"NO! NOT YAY AT ALL!", screamed Thoas as he run for his life.
[Final Boss]
Kampê
Greatest nightmare of your greatest nightmares
Lvl 1 200
Her snakes-for-hair hissed disapproval, and her dragon half clattered with claws in desperate need of a pedicure. Thoas, Kampê's unlucky target, sprinted like a panicked squirrel, likely regretting not pursuing a safer career, like accounting.
Icarus, high in the air with a sniper rifle, resembled a confused bird holding a firearm. Attempting heroics with the confidence of a potato playing secret agent, he fired his rifle. Bullets bounced off Kampê like annoying mosquitoes.
"AAAAAAA!WHY THE FUCK AM I THE BAIT! COULDN'T GROVER DO IT!HE'S FASTER"
As Kampê advanced, her skin bubbled and morphed, spawning mutant animal heads that looked more confused than threatening. A bear roared, a boar snorted, and a wombat seemed offended to be part of the ensemble. Vipers sprouted from her legs, one of them biting Thoas. Fuck. Poison. Kampê's reptilian eyelids blinked sideways.
And then, as Kampê brusquely changed her path and spit acid at Hodge, killing - definitely - the poor Satyr in the Process, it wasn't funny anymore. Fuck. They had made it without any loss so far!
[You Party Member, Hodge, has died]
"HODGE!", screamed Grover. He then went fo a kick, but Kampe spit acid at him too - and if not for his newly found Stone skin, he would have died too.
With a flick of her hand, the daughter of Tartarus and Gaia swept Medusa aside, sending her hurtling against the wall of Alactraz prison. Thopas turned and skidded to a halt, slipping between Kampe's legs and thrusting his sword into her belly. This only served to piss off the monster.
"I did not want to use it, as I don't know how to control it yet, but…Friendfyre : Divine Flames, Dionysian Edition", screamed Bellatrix. She cackled madly as she invoked a colossal, tipsy serpent of flames that swayed like it had one too many shots. The fiery inebriate charged at Kampe, leaving a trail of blazing flames in its wake.
"Fuck! Why is it roasting me too", screamed Thoas.
Grover and Medusa, who had risen to their feet, took advantage of the confusion to hit two of his heads. With one blow from her ninjato, Medusa even managed to decapitate one of them.
"I got one of his eyes," cried Icarus, but the victory was short-lived - she had ten others regenerating.
"Fuck…You won't get me, you dirty asshole". Thoas turned around and came face to face with Kampê. "I'll die on my terms, not yours, goddamn balls." He uncorked his bottomless flask of whisky, a gift from his father. Kampê stopped in front of him, curious. "My mom always said that life is like a box of chocolates. If there's alcohol in it, it's bad for you". Thoas began pouring alcohol over his head. "And Dad always said, even though I don't understand much about magic, that symbolic acts are very powerful". Thoas charged Kampe, throwing himself at her covered in alcohol, trying to sacrifice himself, praying he'd understood what his daron was saying about magic and symbolism.
The fiery serpent engulfed him just as he touched Kampe, and everything went white.
[You Party Member, Thoas, has died]
[You have slain Kampe]
[Congratulations! You have completed the Dungeon: The Labyrinth]
The congratulations felt hollow.
?
16th May 2008
Thoas opened his eyes.
Uh?
"I'm not dead?"
Then, someone kicked him in the ribs.
"Of course, you're dead. Welcome to the Rukongai. Now, give me everything you have".
End of Arc 4
AN : Why is Thoas in Japanese afterlife, if he his the son of a japanese mortal and a greek god ?
I'll explain my reasoning.
First, I had to make a choice. Because of the crossover, there was a necessary contradiction between the world of PJO - where everyone goes to the Greek underworld, from what I understand (I've only read PJO and Heroes of Olympus). Notably, European hell during WWII is Greek hell - an assumption that doesn't work in my AU, where the gods were kicked out of Europe by Christians long before. Similarly, in Bleach, everyone goes to the Rukongai. So I had to make a choice, and think about the following question: how, in a world where atheists are very numerous, could the gods of different pantheons have made a deal - and on what rules - to govern the dead?
The obvious choice would be to say: everyone goes to the afterlife of the god they pray to. I didn't choose this option for two reasons: firstly, because it would leave out atheists. And secondly, because it would mean, from a pragmatic point of view, being able to say precisely, for each person, what their religion is. Yet, in most cases, the rites actually practiced by individuals are often amalgams of several religions or superstitions (Boyer, 2001).
I therefore opted for a more pragmatic solution, and one that was more in keeping with the "territorial" aspect of the gods in my fiction (e.g. Americans are not Greek, but American hell is Greek hell). So I wanted a link between country and afterlife. So I took up the most widely-used criterion for settling conflicts of jurisdiction in private international law in personal matters, i.e. determining jurisdiction by the personal, not the geographical, criterion of citizenship. Hence the consequences of Prometheus' fiddling.
