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I had second to last shift. I managed to sleep in two chunks. When we got up we had a light breakfast. Beans in cans. If this were Beacon or if we had more time Ren could have whipped something delicious up. As it was… well… beans had to do.
"Alright kidos!" Moura announced. She stood on a rock with her hands on her hips. I thought of what she told me the day before. I looked at the earth beneath pine trees. I didn't meet her eye. "We probably have a long day of travel. A monster like this will have a base of operations," she finished.
"A home?" Nora asked. Moura shook her head.
"Grimm aren't animals. They aren't like that. They don't sleep and don't rest. It just strikes out when it sees an opportunity."
"Oh," Nora nodded. "I think I get it."
"Good because I'm bad at explaining," Calico returned. "Let's go!"
Through open country and wilderness we followed the tracks until we came upon a small dwelling. A mountain. A hole in the mountain.
"Ladies and gentlemen this is it!" Moura declared. "Get excited."
I nodded and lifted my weapons. Pyrrha looked ready. Nora had a yellow dust crystal and was ready to eat it. Ren, ever, stoic, just raised stormflower.
The monster leapt out of the hole in the ground at us rather than we at it. Its paws were the size of my torso and it had razor sharp claws and two long curved teeth. It batted me to the side with ease. Ren cried out and rained bullets down it in a long flipping arc. Pyrrha threw her spear and it struck true. Moura twirled her weapon and opened a gash in the side of the monster. When I got back up Nora ate her crystal and came flying into the fray. She smashed down on its head and it in return just gave her a funny look. A bit like 'why would you do such a thing?' Nora screamed and opened fire with her hammer buried on its head. The grenade explosion knocked its head into the dirt. It didn't look particularly hurt yet. I took a slice into one leg. It didn't do much. Ren met me there and stabbed down. Then he flared his aura and slammed stormflower in. There was an explosion of green energy and the paw burst. The beast recoiled.
Moura kept up the action. She moved in a silvery blur. She slammed the head of the ax into its side and the blow rocked the monster. The beast took Nora into her mouth and shook her like a doll. Nora cried out in pain as those teeth sunk into her aura.
"Keep moving!" Moura called out. I did. I moved in a circle about the monster. I wasn't still when it lunged at me with a paw and missed. I stabbed its neck and it dropped Nora twenty feet. She got up and leaned on her hammer.
Pyrrha swept in and recalled her spear to her. She fluidly changed her weapon's form and slashed deep wounds in the monster which would never heal.
"Nora!" I called. She readied an open palm. "Pyrrha!"
Pyrrha stepped into Nora's open palm. Nora shot the ground and launched Pyrrha in a long arc. Pyrrha swept down and took the head off the beast in a single smooth stroke.
It began to turn to ash in the dirt.
"Good work. You all did good," Moura encouraged.
"You think so?" Ren asked her. She nodded.
She leaned on her weapon. "Yeah you kids will go places. You're better off than I was at your age," she informed us. "Come on. Let's check out the cave."
We went in the hole in the ground. I heard noises from the back wall. It was dark and wet inside.
"What is that?" I asked Moura about the sound.
"Kittens I guess. I would hazard," she bobbed her head. Her weapon glowed in the dark. "Let's find them and snuff them."
"But they're babies!" Nora exclaimed.
"Not really. They are monsters. Don't think about them that way."
We came across a crevice in the cave where the kittens were hiding. Their eyes glowed out at us.
"Snuff 'em, kids!" Moura ordered.
"But they are adorable," Pyrrha pointed out. Moura rolled her eyes.
"And they'll grow into forty foot killing machines. We have to put them down. Here," she sliced one's head off and the other three kits hissed. "Fuckers," Calico murmured.
I stepped in and slashed one. It turned to ash from the touch of the celestial metal. Titania held an edge like no other material. Pyrrha stabbed another and Ren cut the throat of the last.
"Is there another one? Usually it takes two to you know… have babies…" Nora stammered.
Moura thought for a moment then shook her head. "Nah. I don't think so. Again. They aren't animals. They don't need help to reproduce. Grimm goo just does it all on its own. You can think of them as clusters of sentient nano machines. They don't behave like animal cells. They just do Grimm things. You know?"
"What are the Grimm really?" I wondered.
"No one really knows. They are monsters and that's enough for me. If you wanna be a hero it should be enough for you too," she raised an eyebrow at me in the dark. "Well?"
"Yes. They are the darkness and we are the light," I answered.
"Good boy," she nodded. "Come on then. Jobs done. I'll collect my reward from the sheriffs office and hopefully you kids learned something. Apprenticeship is a classic."
"I think I did…" Nora trailed off. I met Calico's eye. I didn't look away. She stared me down for a moment. She considered me as though seeing me for the first time. She nodded nice and slow.
"What'd you learn? Kid?" She asked me. "What'd you learn?"
I shrugged. "Grimm aren't animals," I echoed. It wasn't the answer she was looking for and it was a bit of a lie even if it had elements of truth to it. That wasn't what I truly learned.
I learned what it would cost me. To slay monsters and people, I suppose. I had to recover. I had to do it on my own. Pyrrha couldn't help with this. As great as she was. I had to do this on my own.
That's what it meant to be a hero. It meant being alone. Nobody was coming to the rescue. I wasn't sure if I was going to make it. But I thought I could try. And I probably didn't have a good second chance. There wasn't a second chance at this kind of thing; not a good one, at least. I had to be transcendent. I had to be fucking good. As good as Pyrrha was, if not better. Pyrrha had shown she was nearly invincible in class. Her weapon and semblance made her untouchable. Meanwhile I was just Jaune. I wondered if it was possible to be happy and to be 'Jaune' at the same time. I wondered if that was fair but in the end I just sorta shrugged and thought that's life as a 'Jaune.'
I wonder what Weiss felt like. I wonder what Ruby felt like. And above all I wondered what Pyrrha felt like. I called in our airship and we boarded to head back to the academy. We arrived at the village nice and late. The pilot picked us up with a smile.
"How'd it go?" He asked me. I smiled at him.
"We killed it," I answered. "The monster which was picking off civilians. We killed it."
"Fine work," he nodded. I shrugged but couldn't forget Calico's words. Her brief sermon on the outcropping to me was etched into my mind. The best advice she could give was to quit. I knew that was what she had wanted to say. But I… I just couldn't. Not with everything as it was. Not with people counting on me. I didn't struggle this much, through fire and flames and blackmail and hate just to give up here and now. I wasn't sure I ever would. I wasn't sure I'd ever find what I was looking for. I wasn't sure I'd ever be a hero. I didn't know how to love and to live and to hate and to kill things. I just didn't. And I was starting to believe it couldn't be taught. That it was just something people who knew just intrinsically knew. I didn't know but I knew I had a lot to think about. Pyrrha took my hand with a concerned look. I shrugged her off. I didn't want her concern. The purity of it burned me. Like staring at the sun. I rejected her touch and the things she felt for the moment and I was allowed that. I knew I'd have to come and face reality eventually. In exchange for everything she had given me I hoped to be there for her.
I couldn't pay her back. I never could. She was too sweet and pure. She was the real hero of the two of us. She was the heroine here. That's what wasn't fair.
"Jaune?" she asked when I brushed her aside and the plane hovered along.
"Yeah?" I wondered.
She hesitated. "You don't seem yourself…" she stammered.
"I'm just thinking. I'll be alright Pyrrha. Pinkie promise. Don't break your back over me," I softly smiled at her.
"If you say so… there's no need to cut yourself off from us. You're as much a member of this team as the rest of us," she responded.
"I was always cut off from my sisters. I was always the odd man out. Not just because I was a guy and the oldest. But I was also supposed to be reachable in ways mom just wasn't. I think being a leader is like that too. I think I can support you but never drink those waters myself. And with your help I feel like I can do anything. I only have made it this far because of you, after all."
"I thought you did well," she breathed. Fuck; she was so close. And she smelled crisp. I breathed in the flavors of her aura and it brought comfort to my conflicted mind. She leaned on me and smiled and shut her eyes. She breathed deeply. Eventually she fell asleep with me just looking at her.
Ren was on my other side. He was watching us closely. Nora was talking to the pilot animatedly and describing our ordeal.
"Look at her, Ren," I whispered. He nodded. "What bliss?" I asked rhetorically.
He smiled at me. "You're a lucky guy, Jaune," he murmured.
"I don't feel lucky but I suppose I'm fortunate. I have good friends. I go to a good school. I guess… I don't know. I wish my family situation was different but I suppose I shouldn't complain about that to you."
"Why? Because I'm an orphan? I had lovely parents. They cared deeply about me," he responded.
"Yeah but I still have family," I sighed. "I should be more grateful. But it's hard. You know?"
He nodded like he got it and didn't seem offended.
"My parents didn't believe in me. My father in particular didn't," I kept up.
"My parents were hunters and unlocked my aura when I was young. My father trained me and disciplined me and made sure I was happy. I recall my mother; her face; how kind she was. She wanted the best for me at all times. It's hard to resent that," he nodded. "Now that it's gone I don't take it for granted. I used to. Now I have Nora and- well, we're close."
"The closest," I agreed. "You never think about her?"
He blushed. "I think it's natural to ask 'what if,' isn't it?" He tagged.
"Yeah," I whispered looking at Pyrrha. "It is."
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-WG
