Chapter 6: The Real Experience
"What in the hell were you thinking, Stella?!" Sam half shouted at me as I dropped the keys in Dean's hand.
I sighed and fought back the tears. "It's kind of a long story. I'll tell you as we head back."
I took one last look at the sliding glass doors to make sure Mike wasn't about to see anything and flip out about them hurting me. He didn't need to know I was spanked when I broke the rules. It wasn't something that I could explain and be sure he would understand. Luckily he was no longer watching. I sighed with relief as I turned back to my demise.
Dean stomped away to the car and Sam grabbed my arm leading me to follow Dean. He led me around to the other side of the car and gave me several hard swats before he half threw me in the back seat on the passenger's side. I was honestly surprised that was all I got at that moment. That was the most pissed I had seen Sam be at me in the year that I had known him. I wanted to vomit from the guilt building up. Why couldn't he just spank me more so I could know we were okay again?
I didn't look up from my hands during any point on the way to the hotel. I talked quickly on the drive back explaining my home town. And my parents' death. And Mike. And why I went there. And why it was stupid. And how I knew my ass was toast and I accepted whatever they had to dish out. The explanation took longer than the drive, but we all just sat in the car as I talked. And then I got to my question for them.
"How did you know where I would be?" I quietly asked them.
Sam replied, "You really think we didn't look into you before we allowed you to hunt with us? We knew about your parents and their house. So when you disappeared this morning, we figured you were going back to the house. Luckily someone drove by shortly after you left and we convinced them to give us a ride to the house. I just can't believe you were so stupid! We were here on a case. Not for play time at your old house." He stopped talking and took a few breaths.
"I'm sorry," I said in a whisper.
It wasn't often that I saw Sam this upset. I looked around. The Impala was the only one in the empty parking lot, and our room was at the end. We were far away from any humans, and with the punishment I was about to receive, that was the only solace I had. As I finished analyzing my demise, Sam got out and opened my door while he half pulled me out of the car. Again he turned me across his body and applied more stinging swats to my behind. After about thirty seconds of that, he finally led me to the driver's side.
"You will have my complete forgiveness when I get back, Stella, but don't you ever do something so stupid again," Sam said to me as we stopped in front of Dean.
I rubbed my ass with my free hand as Dean opened the door and stood from the car. He took my arm from Sam and nodded to him as they passed each other.
"Don't come back for two hours, " he said with little emotion as Sam got in the car.
I tensed my whole body. TWO HOURS?! I was surely being led to my death. But Sam simply nodded, started the car and drove away. I was definitely dead meat. Dean pushed me to the door, still gripping my elbow. He reached past me to unlock the door and pushed me in, releasing my arm. I half stumbled forward and caught myself, breathing for just a moment. I turned around fully expecting to have to yell at him to listen, but as I turned he grabbed my face and kissed me with intensity. That took the words out of me. I quickly lost my fire and just barely had time to return the kiss before he pulled away to talk.
"Stella. I love you. No. I'm in love with you. And I have been since... Well. For a long time. I can't have you putting your life in danger like this anymore. I can't lose you. I just can't. Watching you with Mike made me realize how much I really love you. I was jealous of the way you were with him. You were touching each other openly, and you were very clearly ogling his body. There were too many things that made me think about life without you. And I just needed you to know. So now you know." As Dean finished he wiped an escaped tear from his cheek.
I blushed with embarrassment. I couldn't speak. My eyes started to well up with tears again. I couldn't find my words. What had I done? I pulled him into a tight hug and let the warmth of his body calm me before speaking.
"Dean, I have loved you since the first time I saw you burst through my door." I pulled away so I could look him in the eyes, but he kept his arms locked around me. I reached up a hand to trace his face with my fingertips as I spoke. "You have no idea how hard it's been to not be able to tell you that I'm acting foolishly because I'm in love with you. Maybe I could have saved myself a heated ass a few times if I'd told you the truth?" I said hopefully.
Dean shook his head and laughed lightly. "I wouldn't have counted on it. You were still stupid. And you are pretty obvious, but I thought you didn't tell me cuz you couldn't let yourself be with someone who hits you anymore."
Another tear threatened to escape his eyes and I couldn't take it. I took his face in my hands and kissed him gently. I pulled away and wiped away the newly fallen tear.
I sighed and decided it was time for the rest of the story. I stepped away and sat down on the bed. He joined me, sitting close enough to where the entire sides of our bodies were touching. I found myself looking down at my hands as I twisted around.
"Dean... I've purposely been pushing you because I thought you were pushing me away, and I thought if I acted out you would give me more intimate attention. I know now that I should have just told you my feelings. I have never once resented you for taking care of things in the agreed upon manner. You really think any of those other guys said, 'Hey, mind if I slap you around when I'm upset?' No. They hit me to make themselves feel better, not because they care. I mean I'm sure by now you've noticed that I don't always make the best choices when it comes to men. I have a hard time with functional relationships. And I think that has a lot to do of my losing my trust of men when Joe and Ricky attacked me and tried to rape me."
I paused my story when Dean clenched his jaw and his hands went into fists. I watched him trying to calm himself. He closed his eyes. I reached out and touched his clenched hand. It took another breath before he finally released his fist and took my hand. He spoke gently to me.
"Stella. I'm really glad you didn't let me know about this earlier. I don't know that I could have stopped myself from killing them, or at least very seriously injuring them. You didn't deserve that. And you didn't deserve the life that you created for yourself before we found you. Even since you have been with us, you've been too hard on yourself. It's hard for me to watch. I figured you were just trying to purposely get killed because you don't see your purpose in life. I couldn't let myself watch it anymore. Nothing I did was helping."
Dean stopped and closed his eyes again. But this time he was much calmer. I considered not telling him anymore, but I had closed him off from my past for long enough. There was so much that I learned about him every day, and I remained a mystery.
"Thank you, Dean. And I'm sorry for making you feel like I didn't want to live. I just didn't want to live without you." I took a moment to gather my thoughts again.
"I know you would have been unable to control yourself had you known about Joe and Ricky. Which is why I stopped it from being said earlier. Just know that Mike was there to help me stop them when that happened. He saved me from a worse emotional damage than I have brought upon myself. After that, Mike and I went to college together. We tried dating for a while, but it was very clear that we were better off as friends. After graduation, I traveled and went to figure out where I wanted to go with my life. I extended my trip so my parents decided to fly out and meet me, but they never made it. Their plane crashed, but their bodies were never found. So at the funeral when I ran into Mike, I begged him to take care of their home so I could find myself. With the large amount of money they left me, I offered to pay for the general bills since the house was paid off as long as he kept it up and always billed me for anything the house needed. He doesn't really ask me for money. Mostly just taxes. But I still give him something from time to time. From there you know how things went. Drinking. Abusive men. Martial arts. Lots of moving around. And then... You... I never wanted to die. I just wanted to keep you safe and prove to myself without a doubt that you could love me back."
I stopped talking at abruptly. I knew I had said all that was needed at this time. And I also knew what was yet to come. Though I felt like I was on cloud 9, I was still drowning in my guilt. Dean simply sat there frowning and taking everything in. Finally, I sighed again and broke the silence.
"Dean, I know what I did was wrong. And I had every intention of you never finding out. I tried to roll the Impala further away so it wouldn't wake you and Sam. Clearly, that didn't work out. And I'm very grateful for that. If you wouldn't have shown up when you did, I know I would be hurt far greater than I am. I let myself be caught off guard...again. I didn't follow any of my instincts. I stole your car. I lied to you. And I went off without telling anyone where I was going. I was stupid and childish, and I deserve whatever punishment you see fit."
Dean looked at the clock, and I followed his line of sight seeing that nearly 45 minutes had passed. As Dean sat for a moment frowning, I opened my mouth to speak again, but he stopped me with a shake of his head. He pulled out his phone and sent a text to Sam. Apparently he needed Sam to make himself scarce for an extra hour longer than anticipated and that he shouldn't worry. Great. I was hoping two hours was going to include the extra information Dean had wanted from me. Finally, he turned to me.
"Stella. What you did was beyond stupid, and I need to be sure that you never try to pull something like that again. This punishment is going to make your past ones feel like a walk in the park. So I need you to tell me truthfully if there is any part of you that was caused injury earlier today. I would rather not have to put this off, but I need you to be safe and feel the full pain in your ass."
I felt my skin flushing again as I took a moment to analyze myself. The only injury I seemed to have was a bruise on my arm. But that was nothing. I didn't notice the pain from that, but I definitely noticed my face and ears growing hotter as I was suddenly extremely embarrassed by what I had pushed Dean to do. My breathing started to speed up again, and I replied before I lost my nerve.
"I'm fine. Let's just get this over with so I don't feel like shit anymore."
He nodded in response and went to pull one of the chairs away from the obstacles surrounding it. He cleared his throat and shifted awkwardly before speaking again in a more hardened voice.
"You need to listen to me during your punishment. It's going to be long and hard, and I will be asking you to assist me during it. I know it's going to be tough to keep your hands out of the way, but I need you to do your best to keep them out of the line of fire. Can you do that for me?"
I got that familiar feeling of my heart catching in my throat. My breathing began to speed up choking my words away, so I simply nodded. He looked like he was going to reprimand me for not actually confirming with my words, but he stopped before saying anything. Instead he just sighed and took his belt off. The sound of the leather passing through the loops of his jeans sent shivers through my body and my eyes widened. He set the belt on the table and began speaking again, looking more determined.
"Stella, you will start this punishment over your jeans. As it progresses, I will remove layers until you are getting your bare ass warmed. Then I plan to finish it off with 10 licks with my belt. Should you start to fight me or get out of line during anytime, I will add to the number with the belt. Got it?"
This time I was able to find my voice, "Yes, sir."
He cringed slightly at the phrase, but seemed to accept it. He walked back over to me to talk.
"Tell me why we're doing this."
I hated this part. But I didn't make him wait long for my reply.
"I left without telling anyone where I was going, stole your car, put myself in unnecessary danger, and lied... a lot."
He nodded approvingly and turned around. He stepped over to the chair and sat.
"Alright, little miss. You know the rules. Across my lap. Grab on tight."
I almost smiled at him, but all of my emotions seemed to be crashing down on me at once. I forced myself to make the short walk over to him, and he helped me get situated across his lap. I steeled myself, knowing that I deserved everything he was about to offer, and probably more. As I settled in I started to wonder how much worse it would be on my bare ass. I had actually put on my boy short cut panties this morning knowing that if I got caught it would help protect me from the spankings I was used to. Now I wondered if I would have skipped a layer had I only been wearing a thong. And with that, my thoughts were interrupted by the first swat. It didn't seem to be as hard as it had been the past, so I relaxed a bit hoping that it wouldn't be tough to get through it.
As he continued this lighter punishment for the next ten minutes, I started to worry. Maybe he was saving his strength so he could spank me for the full two hours. I suddenly started to panic and missed him asking me to lift my hips so he could pull down my jeans. I was snapped out of my thoughts by a downpour of swats.
SMACKSMACKSMACKSMACKSMACKSMACKSMACKSMACK
"STELLA! I SAID HIPS UP!"
I quickly lifted my hips and helped him unbutton my pants and pull them down. As the cold air hit my thinly covered bottom, I shivered. I was starting to understand what people had meant by a "warm-up spanking". Every nerve in my ass seemed to be hyper aware of every piece of dust that brushed by. I swallowed hard and grabbed onto the chair once more.
"Ready?" he asked gently.
I nodded and forced myself to breathe.
SLAP
Oh wow! That was a new sting!
SLAP
Clearly he had been going easy on me by letting me keep my jeans on. But with the thin material that my underwear was, in the bare couldn't be that much worse, right?
SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP
I started to grunt with each hit as he fell back into his rhythm. After a while, the burn was starting to be too much so I started wriggling back and forth. Dean simply paused, readjusted his arm around my waist to pull me closer, and continued on.
SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP
The tears that had formed in my eyes started to pour over the edge of my eyelids. I wasn't giving in just yet, but the sting definitely made my eyes react.
As Dean continued on for another 10 minutes or so, I was just about to break down when he stopped again. I felt him grab the waist of my panties and lifted as he pulled them down. I let out a silent sob at this new layer of punishment. He shifted my full body to his left thigh and lifted his right leg on top of my legs. I was fully pinned down. I was somewhat grateful, but that also scared me shitless. He grabbed my waist again and pulled me close while I tried to figure out a better way to hold the chair since my head was now closer to the ground.
Dean seemed to understand and gently piped up, "Try holding the chair legs on the opposite side."
His voice sounded grim, but I couldn't let him stop now. This punishment needed to happen... For both of us to be able to move on. I reached across, finding I could comfortably rest on the top of my head while supporting myself still. It was also easier to reach the ground with my feet in this new full V positioning of my ass. In that moment I also realized how much more vulnerable I was. Not only was my ass at a new angle, but now it was completely bared. A tingling sensation started to spread to more intimate areas as he set his hand on my ass.
When he gently rubbed his hand over my backside, I moaned with pleasure and my body was covered with goosebumps. I felt a twitch on the side that was pressed into Dean, and I felt him tense as he stopped caressing me. He cleared his throat and shifted in the seat as he lifted his hand away. Despite the burning on my ass, I was hungry for his touch. I needed to feel more of him. And then... The next swat fell.
SLAP
My hands instantly shifted to the floor by my face as I arched back in pain. I sucked in air through my clenched teeth as I tried to settle back down. Clearly I wasn't going to find comfort in grabbing the legs of the chair.
SLAP
He came down hard again, but this time I was more prepared. The tears that had been drying came back in full force.
SLAP
SLAP
SLAP
SLAP
He started off slow as I experienced this whole new level of punishment. He held his slower rhythm for what felt like forever. The pain gradually became completely unbearable. I couldn't even try to shift slightly out of the way in this new hold. And then... He picked up the pace again.
SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP
It didn't take long before I had broken down and just laid over him crying like a wet noodle. The sensation in my more private parts was still there, but it was no longer at the forefront of my mind. He was definitely making sure this was a punishment. I started back up with the grunts and yelled "ow" a few times as he gave a little extra force to my sit spots. I felt him pause and adjust again and thought he was reaching for the belt. Looking back on it, I wish it would have been the belt at that point. Instead he did what I had come to call the big finisher.
He left no time to recover between swats and put all of his force behind them. In my previous punishments, it definitely left a lasting impression. And that had just been over my jeans until this point. When I could sense it coming I immediately tried to reach back to protect myself crying out about how sorry I was.
"I'll never do it again! Please! I've learned my lesson. I'm so sorry, Dean"
My blubbering went on for longer than I'd like to admit, but a few sharp swats after him yelling my name didn't work got my attention.
"LISTEN!" he yelled with force, finally gaining my attention. "You need to move your hands, sweetheart. Remember. You wanted this, so you need to accept it. I already forgive you, but you need to know how much you mean to me. So I'm going to give you something to remember about why you shouldn't be stupid about your life anymore. Okay?" As he finished speaking his voice was more calm, but also filled with sadness.
I sniffed and replied trying to lighten the mood, "Now I know why Sam always walks so funny after you deal with him."
My body shook as he laughed. "You honestly might be the death of me, Stella." And then he asked,"Ready?"
I nodded and braced myself on the floor just in time for him to start raining down on me with the worst punishment I had received up until that point.
SLAPSLAPSLAPSLAPSLAPSLAPSLAPSLAPSLAPSLAPSLAP
I couldn't help myself from reaching back, but he didn't stop or reprimand me. He simply pinned my arm against my back and kept up his alternating of cheeks.
The fight almost drained completely from me somehow reignited as he started focusing in one spot for several slaps before moving on.
I must have been full on screaming out by that point because my throat was getting scratchy.
And then, it stopped. He was rubbing my back and telling me, "Shhhhhhhh. It's okay. Just calm down. We're almost done."
And then I was filled with dread as I remembered the belt. I mumbled through my sobs, "How many?"
"Just ten. You were very brave. I'm going to readjust you so neither of us gets injured, okay?"
I nodded as he removed his right leg from pinning me. I helped him lift me back over his lap and pushed myself back. He reached over and grabbed the belt, then pulled me close by my waist again.
"Only ten more. We're almost done."
CRACK
Holy hell! The belt was like my ass was being lit on fire. My feet danced around as I tried to make the sting go away. Somehow I was able to keep my hands away from my searing ass. Dean waited for a few seconds for the pain to sink in then pulled me in again.
CRACK
Oh my God. I was never going to survive this
CRACK CRACK CRACK
The next three came down hard and fast. I almost stood up and ran away. Luckily he was holding me tight with his left arm.
CRACK CRACK CRACK
He came down hard and fast again. I didn't know I had any more fluids to still leak from my face. Clearly, I was wrong.
CRACK
This one came down with more force than the previous ones, so I hoped that meant it was coming to an end. But I screamed and couldn't stop myself from reaching back. He swatted my hand away and placed his arm back around my waist to prepare for my final blow.
CRACK
I just laid there crying, and I heard him toss the belt on the floor. I shifted off his lap to my knees so I could grab my ass better. Dean quickly fell to the floor in front of me, and before he pulled me into a hug I saw his eyes filled with tears. I returned the hug, crying into his chest.
He choked out, "Please don't make me have to do that again, Stella."
And with that my heart fell into 18 pieces. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." I began a new round of crying, but this time from emotional pain rather than just the physical pain.
We held each other there for a while before Dean spoke again.
"Shit. You should get cleaned up. Sammy is going to be back soon."
I stood and quickly pulled my underwear and pants up immediately making myself regret the embarrassment of Dean seeing me that way. He chuckled at me as I hissed in pain then kissed the top of my head. Quickly wiping my face on my shirt, I took the moment to pull him in for a real kiss. I grabbed his jacket and pulled him close. He immediately responded to me and we let the passion build for a few minutes. When I felt myself getting lightheaded I pulled away. Dean smirked at me.
"I think tonight I'll let Sammy get his own bed," he said with a wink as he lightly patted my bottom, pushing me towards the bathroom. "Go. Get cleaned up. There's some arnica in toiletry bag. It'll help with the bruising."
I frowned at him for touching my sore bottom, but smiled as I turned away from him.
"Thank you," I managed to mumble.
When I made the short walk to the bathroom, my stomach was fluttering, and I quickly disrobed. I allowed myself time to take a peek at the damage in the mirror. My ass was a deep shade of crimson with slight bruising. Damn. That was going to make things uncomfortable.
With a sigh, I climbed in the shower, letting the hot water soothe my aching body. Part of me wanted to rush and get back to Dean, but the other part wanted to stay in the water forever.
Once I had finished, I realized I had forgotten to bring any clothes to change into. So I wrapped the towel around myself and peeked out the door. Dean looked up from the small table where he sat alone and smiled.
"Your clothes are on the bed."
I flushed and quickly waddled over to get them.
"Thanks," I said as I grabbed them and went back into the bathroom.
I put my pajamas on and hissed again as my underwear and pants passed over my well punished ass. I was exhausted from all of the events from the past 24 hours, but I was also famished.
When I opened the door this time, I found Sam had returned with the food and the small table had been pulled over to the bed so I could sit on the edge of it. Dean put his chair next to mine and kissed my cheek as he sat down. I blushed and peeked over to see if Sam was watching. He was smiling at the food as he pulled it out of the bag, but he didn't say anything.
Dinner was full of laughter and conversation. I was so thankful for the bed, but still found myself shifting a lot more than I wanted to. Long after the food was gone we continued the light hearted banter, and then I yawned. Dean immediately got serious.
"Okay. I think it's time that we get some rest. We've got a long day ahead of us tomorrow. Dibbs on first shower."
I gingerly stood up and "helped" them move the table back. As the boys put their chairs back, I stood awkwardly not really sure what to do with all the information from today and how much to show Sam. Dean headed off to the bathroom, and Sam took that opportunity to pull me into his arms.
"I can't believe you were so stupid, Stella. Do you have any idea how worried we were? I don't know that I've ever seen Dean that scattered from emotions."
I returned the hug and apologized.
"I know, Sam. I'm really sorry. To both of you. I never meant to cause you pain or worry. I didn't think it would turn out that way. And I know I was wrong to hide my past from you guys. You've shared so much with me and given me a chance for a new life. I took advantage of all that you have offered to me. But I promise things will be different from now on."
Sam smiled knowingly and gave a few light swats to my still sore bottom.
"Get to bed. You are completely forgiven. But if I see that Dean starts to lighten up on the punishments because of this, I won't hesitate to take you over my knee and solve the problem myself, got it?"
My eyes widened and I nodded furiously. "Got it!" I said quickly.
I shuddered at the thought of any more punishment ever. But then I frowned wondering if this wasn't just a relationship where Dean did all the punishing, and I looked over at Sam inquisitively.
He looked up with a look in his eye that said he was dead serious and he was just as experienced as Dean in the art of punishment. "BED!" he said in a slightly playful voice.
I quickly climbed into my bed, and closed my eyes. I heard Sam laughing lightly as I forced myself to fight sleep until Dean came back from the bathroom. He didn't take long in his nightly ritual, and I heard him speak softly to Sam as he came out.
"Alright, Sammy. All yours. Turn off the lights when you're done."
I heard the bathroom door close once again, and then I felt Dean's weight shift me as he climbed onto the bed with me. He was trying to be gentle assuming that I was actually asleep, but as soon as he settled onto his back, I rolled over, hissing as I passed over my sore ass, and laid myself on his chest. I could feel his muscles relax beneath me as he laughed and put his arm around me. He kissed my brow and whispered gently to me.
"Sweet dreams, Stella."
He ran his fingers through my hair and I smiled. I quickly fell asleep to the rhythm of his heart.
