Happy America Day, American readers. And to non American readers...happy Thursday or Friday.

First off, sorry for missing last week. Something came up, and I will not go into it. Second; Gemstones now has a TV Tropes page in desperate need of some love, so, can y'all please help contribute to that? :D

Third: I'm aware that a few days ago, the RWBBY story was discontinued...and before you ask, no, I didn't read it. I did read the farewell, and some of the choices, and...dumb. They were all dumb. Especially the Blake one. And Ben clone. And Ben x Weiss. They...don't really mesh. I also think...this guy completely forgot the purpose of fanfics. Fanfics aren't meant to follow canon. They're meant to be fun, creative projects that let you practice writing and They're meant to be fun and creative. Plus, with reviews, you can practice honing your skills. If you're devoted to it, good. If you take it seriously, great, but...don't get that serious.

Fourth: This chapter, by far, is one of the funniest. Like, seriously. Based it off of Parks and Rec. Fancast wise, Ben's parents woukd be portrayed by Amy Poehler and Adam Scott.

Enjoy.


Ben grunted and gasped for air as the tuxedo's collar squeezed his neck. He couldn't move his arms without the sleeves restricting blood flow, and the rest of the suit didn't fit him much better. "Don't think- I can handle this- much longer…"

"Just hold on," Max comforted him, handing Verdona a pair of scissors. Verdona guided the scissors carefully along the inside, cutting whatever she needed to make her grandson be able to breathe again. Ruby covered her eyes in disgust.

"He is a CHILD!" she cried. "Don't make him wear that ugly thing! Please!"

"Gotta get- out of here!" Ben rasped, his left hand reaching for the Omnitrix. "Going hero!"

Verdona frowned and slapped his hand. "Not on my watch," she quipped (Ruby now knew where Ben got his humor from). She smoothed out his hair with gentle fingers. "There. Now aren't you dapper?"

"It's so hideous…" Ruby murmured, looking at the mirror in horror. "How old is that thing?"

"It's a family heirloom. I wore it when I was Ben's age," Max said proudly. "And Carl and Frank wore it when they were Ben's age. And soon, Ben will give that to someone to wear when they're Ben's age!"

I'm burning this suit, Ben thought to himself. The future will thank me.

"That's not something to smile about," Ruby said disgustedly. "God knows what that suit is made of."

"Needles and itching powder," Ben whimpered as Verdona undid one of his shirt buttons. Ben took in a deep inhale of air and lifted his chin. "The only thing worse than going to a stupid old boring wedding is being in a stupid old boring wedding. Why can't they find someone else to be the ring bearer?"

"You'll live. It's only going to be for a weekend. You should appreciate the time and sacrifices your cousin Joel and Aunt Camille have put into this wedding." Max said chidingly.

"They even picked the same location where we got married!" Verdona smiled. "Oh, being here brings back memories, doesn't it, Maxie?"

"Oh, you know it, sweetie!"

Ben fake gagged. "Oh, please don't do this to me."

"I feel I should mention I shouldn't even be here." Ruby butted in. "So, do I get a pass on the wedding or…"

"Well, Ruby, if one of Camille's cousins can't make it, you'll have to be the flower girl," Verdona said.

"I swear to Oum, if someone makes a joke about me being the flower girl just because of my last name…" Ruby hissed. "Ask them to put my name in as Ruby Xiao Long."

Just then, there was a knock at the door of the RV. Max opened it to see a tall, reedy man with stylized messy brown hair, chocolate brown eyes, and a bit of a five o'clock shadow. He was wearing a white button up, a dark blue blazer, black slacks, and a dark blue tie. The smile he gave Max was eerily familiar, and Ruby had to look at the older man and Ben twice before it sunk in.

"Hey, dad," Ben's dad said jovially.

"Carl!" Max, overjoyed to see his son, immediately wrapped him in a hug. "It's been a while!"

"OH MY GOD, YOU HAVE TO HELP ME!" Ben shrieked from the inside of the RV. "I'M A PRISONER!"

Carl developed a thousand yard stare. "I see you put the tux on him." Shaking off the horror, he walked into the Rustbucket and hugged his mother tightly. "It's been ages, mom. You need to visit more." Carl let go and stared at his son. "Did you loosen the threads for him?" he asked.

Verdona nodded. "Did my best to make sure Ben wouldn't be blue in the face during the entire ceremony. He should be able to breathe."

"This," Ben rasped weakly, "is the worst pain in my life."

Carl patted his son on the shoulder. "If it makes you feel any better, I wanted to burn that thing when I was your age."

Ben considered that. "Ok, that sort of makes me feel slightly better."

"How's your summer been, Ben?" his father asked casually. "I've heard some interesting things from your grandpa."

Ben's eyes quickly darted to the Omnitrix and back at his dad. "Define interesting."

Carl raised an eyebrow. "Well, you've been all over the country, right? I'm sure you had some adventures."

"Uh...it was just me…" Ben paused, wracking his brain for an excuse. "...enjoying the spirit of America?"

"Good answer," Ruby said, sarcasm dripping from her voice.

"Fight me, Xiao Long."

"You'd lose, Tennyson," she drawled teasingly.

"You must be Ruby," Carl said with a smile, holding out his hand. "Glad to see Ben's making new friends."

Ruby shook his hand happily. "And as his friend, I would personally help in burning that hideous tux."

Carl laughed. "No wonder you two get along so well."

"So, where's Sandra?" Max cut in.

"Checking in at the lobby," he explained briefly. "And also trying to avoid family drama."

"Drama?" That got Ben's attention. He didn't know much about Joel or his new aunt. Joel hadn't visited often while he was growing up, and besides, Ben was always kept in the dark about any weird family history.

Verdona sighed. "Let's just say Camille's family relationship with your great aunt and uncle is...complicated."

"Come on, it can't be THAT bad." Ruby said, raising an eyebrow.


[SETTING: A SMALL CONFERENCE ROOM. THERE IS A LONG OVAL TABLE IN THE CENTER, SURROUNDED BY COMFORTABLE CHAIRS. AN OVERHEAD PROJECTOR IS AT THE FRONT. RUBY SITS IN FRONT OF A CAMERA, HANDS CLASPED TIGHTLY TOGETHER, EYES HAUNTED.]

"I didn't expect much going into this wedding," Ruby admitted, her voice small. "I mean, I've never been to one, but I've seen them on TV, ya know? I knew there would be hijinks and things going wrong, and there always seems to be drama coming from the in-laws. But that dinner? It was just painful."


[Right before Dinner]

Sandra Tennyson was a fairly tall, slender woman with shiny blonde hair styled into loose waves. Her eyes were the same shade of green as Ben's, and she had noticeable smile lines whenever her lips curled. She was dressed in a blue button up with hundreds of little red flowers printed on it, a black blazer mostly covering her top, and black slacks with comfortable matching shoes. She greeted her son warmly, gently pressing a kiss to his temple before pulling Ruby into a hug.

"It's so nice to meet you!" Sandra said, her pulling back so she could fix the younger girl a kind smile. "Max and Ben have only told me good things about you. I'm pretty sure Ben thinks you're the coolest person he's ever met."

"MOM!" Ben cried out, betrayed.

Ruby, who had been wondering if all moms' hug felt so nice, merely smirked at him. "Dude, I already know."

"While I love all the warm fuzzies, we should really be heading in," Verdona said with a strained smile. "Best not to keep everyone waiting."

Sandra's smile turned plastic. "Oh, I'm not looking forward to this."

Carl squeezed her shoulder comfortingly. "You've got your political face on, you can do this."

Max, Verdona, Ben's parents and the kids entered an extravagant looking dining room, with stone pillars and large round tables and what looked like stained glass on the windows. A dozen fancy trays of expensive food were atop serving trays nearby. Joel and Camille stood to the side, welcoming guests and thanking them for coming. Joel was a handsome, tall man with sleek black hair cut short, a sharp, square jawline, and casual clothes that stretched across his athletic frame. Camille was an equally beautiful woman with dark red hair, vibrant blue eyes set in a heart-shaped face, and a slender framed that showed off toned muscles.

"Joel!" Max greeted the two. "Good to see you again. Congratulations on the wedding!"

Joel looked at Max, relieved. "Oh, thank God, I'm so glad you're here. Maybe you can talk some sense into my parents."

Carl groaned. "Let me guess. It's about that again, isn't it?"

"They've been talking nonstop about it all week!"

"Oh believe me," Sandra said with a grimace, "they've had plenty of time to get used to it. The fact they aren't is just upsetting."

Ben nudged Ruby with his elbow. "Did the bride murder someone?"

Ruby brushed the comment off. "Hush, spicy drama going on."

"Max!" A voice from across the room greeted. Ben's great uncle Gordon and great aunt Betty-Jean entered. Gordon was a fairly husky, stern looking man with his brown hair in a combover and what looked like a handlebar moustache covering his mouth. He was wearing a long sleeved brown shirt with a single button at the collar, khakis, and comfortable shoes. Betty-Jean had shoulder length auburn hair, slim black framed glasses covering her dark eyes, and a slight smirk on her painted pink lips. She was wearing a black tank top underneath a white cardigan with a faint cheetah print on the front, and paired with a fitted pair of jeans.

"I swear to God," Ruby whispered to Ben, "your family looks like a soap opera."

"Max, I'm so glad you're here." Gordon sounded just as relieved as his son. "Maybe you could talk some sense into these kids." Max rolled his eyes in disgust. Gordon rested his arm on his brother's shoulders. "You have to listen to me. This wedding is a horrible mistake."

Ben and Ruby shot a glance at each other and shrugged.

"Joel, listen to your uncle Max. He's got great plumbing advice." Gordon said to his son.

Ben was caught off guard by that. "Wait, do you mean…"

Gordon visibly panicked. "I mean...have you ever tried to fix a leaky faucet with…a wrench?"

"Not particularly, no."

"Well…" Gordon's brow furrowed. "You should! Good for a boy your age. Why, when I was 14-"

Carl raised an eyebrow. "Ben is not 14, Gordon."

Gordon looked flushed. "I...uh…"

"You should go back to trash talking the wedding," Ruby joked. "You seemed more prepared for that."

Gordon paused. "Who are you again?"

"Now now, Gordon. The kids are all grown up, who are we to get in the way?" A new voice entered the conversation. An older couple entered the room, a bodyguard tailing them. All three of them were dressed rather fancily compared to the others: the generic-looking bodyguard was in a tux; the man was dressed in a more casual suit, all blue save for his white shirt, with his dark hair sheared short and thin wire-framed glasses; and the woman was dressed in a dove gray dress with a purple scarf wrapped around her neck, her brown hair reaching her shoulders and her equally brown eyes as cold as ice.

"These are my parents, Clay and Lymus," Camille happily introduced the strangers.

"What's with the guard?" Ben wondered out loud.

"Oh," Sandra began, "The Manns are very famous politicians. They don't really travel anywhere without a guard due to personal reasons."

Ben eyed the guy up, noting a distinct lack of a walkie talkie, earpiece, or even a weapon. Plus, why was there only one? There should be more if they're that important. "Ok then...where are they from?"

Sandra darted her eyes around. "Um...uh…"

"They're from Europe," Verdona interjected from the back of the crowd.

"Yes, Europe!" Sandra repeated, "They're Europeans."

Lymus stared daggers into Joel's parents. "I'm so sorry we had to meet in such...awkward circumstances."

Gordon and Betty Jean glared daggers back. "So are we."

Joel and Camille's parents continued to glare at one another, ignoring everyone else. Ben looked to the other adults, wondering if one of them was going to interrupt. It got so uncomfortable Camille took it upon herself to break it up. "How about we all just...eat dinner together, ok? No fighting, for just an hour or so, is that too much to ask?" There was a hint of annoyance in her voice.

Both families grimaced, before walking off. Ben chuckled to himself. "Maybe this won't be boring after all."

"It's been like this ever since the engagement," Joel said, shaking his head. "But this week? Everything's going wrong. The wedding venue got robbed, the cameraman's camera got smashed, the flowers all shriveled up and died…"

Max gave a soft smile and patted Joel on the back. "Don't worry, I'm sure it'll all work out." Joel smiled at that.

Camille smiled at Ben and Ruby. "And you must be Ben and Gwen! I've heard bits and pieces about you."

"Actually, this is a friend of mine. Gwen isn't here," Ben told her.

Camille looked a bit embarrassed. "Oh. Then you are…"

"...Ruby Xiao Long," she said, like a liar. "Speaking of which, where is Gwen?"

"Well, Natalie and Frank decided to avoid the whole family drama and visit Gwen during her program's last week," Sandra explained. "They send their blessings...and an expensive wedding gift."

Ben smiled. "Oh, good. Now I don't have to see dweeb again this summer."

"Yeah, Joel's mentioned that you and Gwen don't get along." Camille noted. "Is it really true you stopped speaking to her for a full two months because of a stick of gum?"

Ben nodded. "Whatever you've heard, it's all true. Even the incident with the spaghetti and the dogs."

Camille processed that comment. "...huh. Weird."

Max chuckled. "Nothing's too weird for the Tennyson family, trust me."

And right as Max said that, cousin Sunny entered the scene, dressed all in black. She looked like she wanted to be anywhere but here, and put in some earbuds blasting My Chemical Romance.

Max blinked and shook his head. "...ok, except for maybe that. I don't...I don't know what this is."

[Dinner]

"Wanna hear a joke?" Gordon yelled. No one looked like they wanted to hear it, but he said it anyway. "Okay, here goes: My ex-wife still misses me... but her aim is getting better!"

Everyone cringed. Gordon looked around for a different reaction. "Her aim is getting better!" He repeated. "You see, it's funny because marriage is terrible." Betty-Jean rolled her eyes. Joel looked like he was dying inside.

Carl then approached the kid's table. "You kids wanna sneak out of here and get some ice cream? I'm betting brain freeze won't hurt as much as all this."

Ben shrugged. "I could go for a shake or something."

"Yeah, this trainwreck of a dinner is getting way too out of hand." Ruby added. "Also, your cousin is freaking me out." Ruby pointed at Sunny. Sunny was doing the knife game, with Lucy singing the song.

"Oh, I have all my fingers, the knife goes chop chop chop~"

Carl stared at the girls, lost for words. "...alright, uh...just give me and your mom a few minutes, ok? You can wait outside."

Ben and Ruby stepped outside and took a deep breath of the night air. Ruby rubbed her forehead. "Suddenly I'm glad I'm in such a small family."

"I'm starting to see why I see those relatives once a year." Ben joked halfheartedly.

"Yeah, your great uncle really doesn't want this wedding to happen, huh?"

"That's what I'm trying to figure out. There's some uncovered drama about this wedding, and I'm probably not gonna learn about it till I'm like, 17 or something."

Ruby snickered. "Believe me, this is far worse than mine. Mine's just my dad making passive aggressive remarks at my uncle all the time."

"...can I just have that? Please?" Ben pleaded.

"Sorry, no family trades." Ruby folded her arms. "I don't wanna have an uncle who can't eat a piece of fruit without smashing it into his steak first."

Suddenly, a random van from the employee parking lot started up, the motor screeching. It sped out of the lot and started barreling towards the field where the wedding was set up. Ben and Ruby gasped before Ben scanned around quickly, chasing after the truck.

"If my parents ask, I went to run back to the RV for something!" Ben activated the watch and quickly scrolled to Cannonbolt's icon. Ben slammed it down, and within seconds he rolled towards the truck, cutting it off and smashing into the front before it got to the field, stopping it in its path. "Alright, wedding crasher, I don't know what the idea is but-"

Ben glanced up at the driver's seat, only to see it empty. Ben stared at the space like it personally offended him. Suddenly, a strange beeping sound went off from inside the car. Ben's eyes narrowed, and then immediately widened in fear.

"It's a bomb!"

Ben curled back into a ball and then rolled around to the other side of the car. He charged up a spin dash and slammed into the vehicle, sending it flying right into the nearby lake. The car sank into the waters and exploded, sending water everywhere. Ben took a deep breath as he saw the wedding venue, slightly wet but otherwise unharmed.

"That was a close one." He said to himself.

Suddenly, Ben's stubby little legs got ensnared by an energy whip, and he was mercilessly pulled to the ground. As he tried to stand back up, a gun was pointed at his face. He looked up...and was shocked to see Betty-Jean holding a Plumber rifle at him.

"Well, would you look at that?" Gordon smirked. "An Arburian Pelarota. Aliens. Can't trust anyone of them."

Betty-Jean cocked her weapon and pointed it back at Ben's giant face. "Who sent you?"

Ben put up his hands defensively. "Nobody, I swear! I don't even wanna be here!"

"Mom? Dad? What's going on?!"

He looked around to see the family had all gathered to see the commotion. Ben looked absolutely mortified to see them. Ruby was cringing along with him, empathizing with his pain.

"This alien was trying to ruin the wedding!" Gordon yelled.

"I was trying to save the wedding!" Ben motioned to the floating debris in the lake. Betty-Jean slowly lowered her weapon, and Gordon shut off his whip. Both went over to look at the lake. "Now, to make a discreet getawa-"

The Omnitrix suddenly flashed red, and instantly reverted Ben back to human. Ben's face was frozen in absolute terror, as all eyes were on him. Ruby was dying on the inside just watching this.

"...huh." Gordon rustled his hair. "Good work kid."

Betty-Jean knelt down. "Did you happen to see who was in the truck?" Ben was still frozen in shock, unable to process. Why wasn't anyone freaking out?

"...I'll take that as a no."

"Hey, hey, I said no blasters this weekend!" Joel scolded his parents. "I'm gonna have to confiscate those."

Gordon grinned. "You heard him, Betty. Give him your blaster."

"And the whip too."

"Aw, dammit."

Everyone seemed to be more focused on the fact that Betty-Jean and Gordon brought weapons to the wedding rather than the fact Ben just turned into an alien. Ben shot a quick glance at Max, who shrugged and went to investigate the lake with Verdona. Sunny gave Ben an odd look and scoffed. "Weirdo."

Ben whipped his head back at Ruby...and standing behind her was Carl and Sandra, who were checking out the wreckage. Ben mentally freaked out.

He immediately went on the defensive. "Ok, now I know it looks bad but-"

Carl raised an eyebrow. "Wait, were you expecting me to be mad that you stopped that truck?"

"That was some quick thinking, Ben!" Sandra smiled.

Ruby and Ben were just about ready to scream in confusion.

"Wait, you're…" Ben lost track of his thoughts for a second. "...not weirded out by the fact that I'm an alien superhero?"

Carl looked at him blankly. "I mean, if you want me to, then sure."

"...I'm very confused." Ruby commented.

Sandra laughed. "How about we talk about this during ice cream?"


[IN THAT SAME CONFERENCE ROOM. BEN LOOKS AT THE CAMERA, GRABBING AT HIS HAIR AND MAKING IT STICK UP ON END.]

"I-I don't get it? Since when do parents just accept that their kid can turn into aliens? Like, mom and dad are super tolerant about a lot of things, but I figured this would be the tipping point? I'm honestly expecting them to make me put a quarter in a jar every time I turn alien, like we already do that with the swear jar, so, I don't know? My family is weird!"


[Ice Cream Parlor]

Carl and Sandra were certainly enjoying their sundaes, while Ben stared pensively at his chocolate milkshake. Ruby slowly took bites of her strawberry ice cream.

Sandra paused her delight for a few seconds. "Is everything ok? You haven't really touched your drink, sweetie."

Ben shook his head. "Sorry, just...processing."

"Eh, don't worry," Carl said, taking a bite out of a banana. "I had the same reaction when I found out my mom could shoot blasts of photons."

Ruby raised an eyebrow. "Wait, so you know about the Plumbers?"

He shrugged. "Eh, just some bits and pieces. I did get my college scholarship from some Plumber thing, helped do some government work at a few bases..."

"So you guys AREN'T bothered by the fact I'm an alien superhero?" Ben was especially weirded out by that.

"Oh, don't be ridiculous, Ben!" Sandra laughed. "Weirdness runs in this family. We'd honestly be more shocked if you were also an Osmosian."

It was then and there that Ben just decided to mentally accept that, yes, this was really happening. "Alright then…but, since you guys seem to know what's going on, I want a straight answer: what's the big deal with the wedding?"

Carl and Sandra froze; a first for the evening. The two looked at each other and nodded.

"Well, this may come as a shock, but…" Sandra paused for dramatic effect. "The bride's side of the family are aliens."

"Aliens? They don't look like aliens," Ruby commented.

"They're just in disguise for the wedding. Actually, they're one of the toughest races in the galaxy," Sandra explained. "So, good for Joel for landing a fighter."

Carl cleared his throat. "My memory isn't the best, but I remember your grandpa used to talk about this war between this alien race called the Lenopans and the Plumbers. Pretty dirty one too. Lasted for a few generations."

"Well, they were mud people, sweetheart."

"However," Carl continued, "a few years ago, your cousin Joel and Camille met and became close. A truce was formed from that single relationship, believe it or not. This is the first ever marriage between a Lenopan and a human. It could put an end to years of fighting. Camille's parents are politicians, and they've been lobbying for the war to end for quite a while. They see the wedding as some form of armistice, I guess."

"This is like a hardcore Disney princess story," Ruby said, scarfing down her ice cream.

"And someone doesn't want the wedding to happen." Ben frowned at that.

Carl nodded sadly. "Yep. That's family drama for you."

Ruby nudged Ben. "Well, we best keep our eyes open if there's something like that going on."

Ben sighed and took a big sip of his milkshake...only to regret it. He cringed in pain as his head felt like it had been frozen in the dead of winter.

"When did you all find out about the Plumbers?" Sandra asked, finishing up her snack.

"Well, I kinda knew before Ben," Ruby explained. "My mom and dad were friends with Max."

Ben nodded. "Found out a few weeks ago. Just...still kinda shocked you guys knew something about it."

Sandra smiled. "Oh, don't worry sweetie, we're very open minded."

Carl and Sandra chuckled as they continued to eat their ice cream. Ben and Ruby just shrugged and silently agreed with each other that they should just accept the weirdness.


[Wedding Venue, next day]

Water Hazard climbed out of the lake, carrying some debris and putting it in a wheelbarrow. Ben wiped some "sweat" from his brow. "Ok, I think that's the last of it."

"Good work, kid." Gordon smiled. "We'll dispose of this later."

Ben brushed it off. "Ah, I can take care of that. I know someone who needs a good iron filled meal."

Gordon looked befuddled for a second, before he shook his head. He wheeled the debris off, just as Clay and Lymus Mann walked over. Clay studied Ben's Caskan form carefully, as if taking in the majesty of the moment. Ben noticed they were keeping their distance for some odd reason.

"Never thought I'd see the day I'd see this thing in action," Clay commented.

Ben was taken aback. "You guys know about the Omnitrix?"

Clay laughed. "Bits and pieces here and there."

"We heard old folk tales about it from our elders," Lymus continued. "We never believed them...until now."

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, just heard about more alien activity on Earth. More than usual, actually," Clay explained. "That thing is a magnet for trouble, isn't it?"

"Oh, you have no idea." Ben shook his head. "I literally fought a T-Rex this summer. If you told me that a year ago, I would've called you a hack time traveler."

Lymus chuckled. "I suppose we should thank you for last night. Camille's been dreaming about this day for years. I even helped plan some of it. I'm not one to see my good work go to waste, you know."

"Just doing my job." Ben jumped into a heroic pose. "All in a day's work, right?"

The Manns smiled at him before walking off. Ben reverted back to human and stepped back onto dry land, and then sat down on a bench with Grandpa Max.

Max handed Ben a water bottle. "Well, they're certainly putting you to work."

Ben popped open the bottle with ease. "Yeah. Promised a big paycheck for me. Since most of the other staff don't want to take care of this…" Ben chugged the water bottle in mere seconds.

"Well, when life gives you lemons…" Max quoted teasingly.

Ben wiped some water from his mouth. "Oh yeah, by the way, my parent's explained the whole thing to me."

Max nodded. "They mentioned that. How're you taking it?"

"Eh, it was kind of a shock, but I got used to it real quick."

"Believe me, you should've seen your mom's reaction when she found out." Max chuckled to himself.

Ben then realized someone was missing from the group. "By the way, where's Ruby?"

"Your parents took her into town to rent a dress for the wedding," Max explained. "She'll be back soon."

Joel approached the two of them. "Good work with cleaning out the lake, Ben." He smiled.

Ben stretched a bit. "Eh, it's not a big deal. Now, how about we talk about this paycheck?"

"Calm down," Joel chuckled. "We still have a few more things for you to do. Now, how good are you at sculpting?"

Ben looked confused.

For the rest of the week, Ben had to use his aliens to assist with wedding planning. Diamondhead had to make a crystalline sculpture of Camille and Joel, looking like a giant wedding topper. Upgrade had to repair the broken camera. (Ruby used it take a picture of Lucy with the camera, but a laser from the upgraded camera obliterated her muddy body...and then immediately reformed. Lucy was in hysterics while Ben and Ruby stared at a wall for hours, processing Lucy's reaction.) Wildvine had to make a bunch of flowers grow in a garden, and Ruby sliced through them with her scythe to make some bouquets. And finally, Astrodactyl had to do some romantic sky writing for Joel and Camille.

[CONFERENCE ROOM. BEN STARES INTO THE CAMERA GRUMPILY.]

"I swear to God, if I don't make at least a couple thousand from this wedding, I'm throwing myself out of the RV while it's on a highway. Like, I don't mind putting my aliens to work, like it's great to use them without having to beat someone up. But the in-laws? They're not even passive aggressive with each other, they're literally five seconds away from stabbing each other every time they have to interact. I thought the Manns wanted this war to be over, but they're acting like Camille is making a horrible mistake. And why are Gorden and Betty-Jean so fucking racist? It's a miracle Joel turned out so well."

[Wedding Venue, a day before the wedding]

The pre-wedding dinner banquet was filled with all sorts of delightful scents. Ben felt like he was in heaven just walking past the kitchen.

Joel handed Ben's parents a check. "For his services."

Carl glances down at the check and nearly had a heart attack. Sandra actually spat out her drink. Carl shakily asked, "Are you sure you meant to write 3 zeroes?"

"Yeah, I'm sure of it."

[CONFERENCE ROOM. SANDRA STARED AT THE CAMERA BLANKLY.]

"There is no way we can let Ben have access to this money. We've taught him the value of the dollar, but he's ten years old and takes after his father. We might give him a little of that money now, but the majority is being saved for when he's older. There's just- how do we even justify giving a kid that much money?"

[CONFERENCE ROOM. CARL IS STARING INTO THE CAMERA, RUNNING HIS FINGERS THROUGH HIS HAIR AND MAKING IT STAND ON END.]

"I COULD RECREATE THE IRON THRONE WITH THAT MONEY! AND THEY GIVE IT TO A TEN YEAR OLD?! I JUST- WHY?!"

[Back at the Wedding Venue]

Joel went to rejoin Camille at the main table. Ben and Ruby broke off from the group and went to the kids' table. Lucy was pestering Ben with a million questions. "So, what's it like being an alien?"

Ben honestly didn't know why she was asking this one, considering she was an alien. "Uh...it's like a good stretch, I guess."

Lucy clapped her hands in delight, her dark blue eyes sparkling. "Ohhhh! And you!" She waggled her finger at Ruby. "What's it like mercilessly tearing through enemies with a giant scythe?"

Ruby flinched at her sudden tone whiplash. "...empowering?"

"Ohhhh, nice! Soooo, you guys ready for the wedding tomorrow?" Lucy asked, tucking a strand of blonde hair behind her ear.

Ben relaxed a bit. "Honestly, being the ring bearer doesn't seem too bad anymore when you're getting paid."

Ruby smiled. "I don't even have to do anything! I can just doze off during the wedding and wake up before the dinner!"

Lucy then teasingly prodded Ben's shoulder. "Also, are you ready to dance tomorrow?"

Ben's face paled. "Pardon?"

Lucy giggled. "You realize the ring bearer has to dance with the flower girl, right? And that would be moi~ "

"I don't know how to dance!" Ben stammered.

She laughed incessantly. "Well, you better learn~ and fast!" Lucy skipped away as Ben slumped in his chair. Sunny, who watched the whole thing unfold, glanced over at Ben.

"Loser," she declared, before returning back to her phone.

Ben slammed his face into the table. Ruby patted his head sympathetically. "Can you, like, slice off my head?" Ben pleaded. "I want to die painlessly."

Ruby sighed. "Sorry, don't have my scythe on me. I can do it later, though."

"That would be nice."

Clay then stood up and tapped his knife to his glass. All eyes were on him. He cleared his throat. "I really want to thank everyone for being here tonight. Tomorrow is a special and unforgettable day. How about we have a toast of a perfect pair of people who are so deeply and unapologetically in love with one another?"

The families raised their glasses. For the moment, all animosity was put aside for a small moment. "Let us toast to the incredibly exciting road that lies ahead of them."

Suddenly, one of the waiters in the restaurant started freaking out, throwing dishes all over the place. "THE GROOM'S BRIDE IS A WHORE!" he roared.

Everyone turned to look at the waiter, shocked and appalled.

"Camille!" The man yelled. "I am not letting you marry some filthy human without a fight!"

The man's skin starts to contort and bubble, before it turned itself in and out, revealing a purplish sludge monster underneath its skin; this was the Lenopan's true form, and it certainly looked disturbing.

Camille gasped. "It's my ex-boyfriend! How'd he find out about the wedding?"

"Why'd you break up with him?" Verdona asked.

"He was a terrible boyfriend and actor."

"Not true!" Camille's ex yelled. "I got the lead role in a play!"

"It was a one man play, Deefus, and it was absolutely garbage!" Camille yelled back.

"YOU TAKE THAT BACK!" Deefus started to destroy the place, smashing walls and throwing food across the room.

Ben grimaced. "I'm guessing that's the thing that tried to ruin the wedding a few nights ago," he said to himself as he hid under the table. He scrolled to Diamondhead's icon. "It's payback time!"

Ben slapped down the faceplate. White cloaked skin began to surround Ben's body from both his arms to the rest of his body. Striped tentacles ripped out of his chest out and slithered around Ben's neck. As black stripes formed around Ben's body, a green eye formed out as his pupil dilates. Ben poked his head out from the table.

Ben groaned. "Great. I'll spook him to death, I guess," he rasped.

Ruby ducked under the table. "Right now, I'd focus on getting everyone out."

Deefus grabbed Joel and pulled him away from the family table.

"Without our gear, we're sitting ducks!" Gordon yelled.

Deefus held Joel over his head, as if he was going to break him in half...but instead studied him carefully. "Hmmm…"

"W-what are you doing?" Joel asked.

"Studying my latest role!" Deefus replied. "I wanted to do the whole 'replace' thing, but I honestly didn't know what you looked like, so I'm just making sure I get your body right."

"...o...kay?"

Joel suddenly turned intangible and phased out of the hands of the ex. Deefus gasped as Ghostfreak became tangible again, and returned Joel to the family.

"Get out of here!" Ben yelled. "It's gonna get messy." Everyone fled the room in a hurry.

Deefus raised an eyebrow. "An Ectonurite? What are you doin' here?"

Ben shrugged. "Uh, friend of the groom?"

"Then you're no friend of mine!" Deefus attacked again, swinging its arm around the place. Ben easily phased through the attack, and used his tentacles to pierce the Lenopan, but they just got stuck inside him. The ex slowly started to suck Ben into its body.

"Uh oh."

Ben dissipated like mist, vanishing entirely. Deefus looked around the room, trying to locate Ben. He slowly crept around, before he noticed the chocolate fountain; earlier, it was producing something sweet, humans really liked it for some reason. He figured it was a beverage of sorts, but now some strange green goop flowing from it. It was glowing, too.

Ectoplasm suddenly sprayed itself at the ex. Ben was doing his best to "poltergeist" the room, having taken control of everything. The tables and chairs started flying at him, hitting him non stop. Pieces of the wall dug into his skin continuously, and that ectoplasm was seeping into his skin. Deefus screamed in pain before Ghostfreak made himself known.

"Nighty night!"

Ghostfreak tore off his grey skin to reveal his horrifying second skin, terrifying Deefus to his core...and he promptly fainted and oozed unto the ground. Ben took a deep breath as he casually put his skin back on. "Still freaked out by that," he muttered.


[Outside]

Everyone was standing on the lawn, arguing about what to do next, while Max used some vacuum to suck up Deefus and put them in an energy cube.

Camille had her arms crossed. "We are NOT cancelling my wedding." Her voice, normally kind, was filled with steel.

"You realize there will be civilians at the wedding tomorrow, right?" Gordon countered. "What if there's another alien attack?"

"Well, maybe just put it off till the end of the summer!" Ben cut in. "I'm sure this will all boil over somehow."

Joel put a hand on Ben's shoulder. "No. You've already set up too much, we don't want your hard work to go to waste!"

Ruby nudged Ben. "Still wanna get beheaded later?" He weakly nodded.

"Can we at least bring our Plumber gear?" Betty-Jean asked.

Joel shook his head. "No. No weapons."

Verdona grinned. "Besides, you've got some great weapons right here." Verdona's hands lit up, and Ben flashed the Omnitrix.

Lymus put her hands up. "Hey, hey! There's no need for weapons now, it's all over!"

"She's right." Sandra nodded. "It was just a typical disgruntled ex. Remember the one that showed up at our wedding, sweetheart?"

"Oh, yeah," Carl laughed. "Mom blasted him away with her photon blast, wish we video taped that."

Ben and Ruby stared at Sandra and Carl like they were crazy. "Who ARE you people?"

Joel shook his head. "Listen; regardless of what's going on, the wedding is happening tomorrow. No buts. Like Lymus said, it's all over."

"I wish I could believe that myself…" Max sighed as he looked at the cube.

[The Wedding]

Pachelbel's Canon played softly. Camille and Joel stared lovingly into each other's eyes. The left side of the wedding had the Tennysons and Ruby, and to the right, the Manns. Ruby was sitting next to Carl, Sandra and Max. Ben was wearing that ugly burgundy suit, front row and center.

Ruby cringed. "That suit is so ugly on him."

"Aren't you wearing a burgundy dress right now?" Carl asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Burgundy is the color of a dress for a wedding. Never a wedding tux," Ruby stated.

The priest cleared his throat. "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to witness the union between Joel and Camille."

Ben nervously tugged on his tuxedo collar. Max gave him an appreciative thumbs up, while Ruby gave him a look of sorrow.

"This young bride and groom are an inspiration." The priest went on. "They remind us that love...conquers all. If anyone has a reason that these two should not wed, speak now or for-"

The priest couldn't finish his sentence. Mud wrapped around his mouth and suffocated him. Mr. Mann regenerated the portion of mud he fired from his arm.

Clay sneered. "Yeah, we have something to say."

A majority of the Manns all started to reveal their true forms. The bodyguard trapped Betty and Gordon and a majority of the Tennysons in a pile of mud. The priest started shoving people out of the way and screaming bloody murder.

"This wedding, and every human here...is about to be canceled!" Clay said menacingly.

Camille looked horrified. "Mom, dad, what are you doing?"

Ben crossed his arms. "Let me guess; you two did the dirty work."

Lymus grinned. "Of course! Camille's been dreaming about this day for years. And I've planned every single event to perfection, till the brat intervened. I'm not one to see my good work go to waste."

Betty-Jean struggled to get free of her muddy prison. "What did I tell you? Once a sludge, always a sludge."

"They set up the ex-boyfriend to take the fall and divert the suspicion off of themselves," Ruby guessed. "Clever trick."

Clay nodded. "That...and you!" He pointed accusingly at Ben.

Ben was floored. "Me? What do I have to do with any of this?"

"You ruined our partnership with the Limax one month prior to NOW!" Lymus scowled.

"Wait, those slimes from the desert? What do they have to do with anything?"

"We were going to help take out the remaining Plumbers on this miserable little planet," Clay hissed, "but YOU had to ruin everything!"

Ben shrugged. "Hey, just doing my job."

Lymus grinned. "We've accounted for all scenarios. We knew Joel was going to forbid weapons, so you're all defenseless. This will be an easy kill!"

Camille dramatically ripped off her wedding veil. "You forgot something, actually."

"And what's that?"

"The bridezilla meltdown!"

Camille morphed into her monsterous true form. She slammed a giant club into her parents and sent them flying across the lake. She then jumpED across the way, ready to kill her parents. Everyone stared in confusion.

Joel grinned proudly. "She...is gonna be my wife!"

Ben, Max and Ruby approached the stuck Tennysons and tried to pull them out. Verdona prepared a photon blast. "Stand back! This might hurt a b-"

Suddenly, a pink ray of light shined through the mud, utterly destroying it. Everyone was briefly confused...and all eyes were suddenly on a glowing Sunny. She rolled her eyes.

"What?"

Verdona awkwardly grinned. "Well, good to know one of my grandchildren has the spark…"

Ben just shrugged before activating the watch, turning to Heatblast's icon and slapping down the faceplate. In an instant his body was engulfed in flames, before rocks started materializing on his body.

"I'll go help Camille with her parent problem! You guys take care of the rest of the family. And keep Joel away from the others!" Ben barked out some commands.

Carl and Sandra fled with Joel. Ben propelled himself across the lake, while Verdona powers up. She blasted a few Lenopans, but her blasts barely phased them. Ruby pulls Crescent Rose out of nowhere and started hacking and slashing through Lenopans, but to her shock, they just easily regenerated from their wounds.

"Just my luck." Ruby swapped out her normal bullets for some ice bullets, courtesy of her dad. She grinned evilly. "I can finally test these out."

She shot one dead in the chest, and it was immediately encased in ice. Verdona flew at it at top speeds, shattering it into pieces with her powered up fists. Betty-Jean and Gordon looked around helplessly.

Max pulled out a few blasters from his jacket pocket and threw them to the two. "Joel never said anything about me bringing weapons!" The two happily smiled and began blasting the bastards to hell and back.

Meanwhile, Ben was seriously struggling against Camille and her parents. He couldn't use his flamethrowers properly due to them constantly oozing and stretching their bodies. Camille, however, was having better luck; her body was a living weapon, capable of making anything to take out her anger.

Camille morphed her hand into a hammer and bashed her mom's head in.

"Oh, damn," Ben said, slowly backing away. Maybe she should let her settle this...suddenly, something wrapped around him like a python and threw him into the lake. It happened so fast, it took Ben a few seconds to even register it. Ben quickly swam up for air and turned back to the action; Camille was getting strangled by her own father!

"You stupid bitch!" he yelled, tightening his grip around her throat. "I wanted to just keep the damn bloodline pure, and YOU had to ruin it! Your generation is so sickening it makes me want to just-" Clay never got a chance to finish his sentence, as Ben suddenly shot at him with water.

"Thank you, Omnitrix!" Ben grinned. The Omnitrix had shifted him into the much more suited Water Hazard, thanks to Clay mindlessly tossing him into the lake. "Time to rain on your parade!"

Clay recoiled as Water Hazard blasted him again; the water melted him like acid through human skin. Ben grinned underneath his form. "Didn't think I would notice you hated water?"

"That should hold him for a bit," Camille said, rubbing her neck. "Water ruins our molecular structure, it'll be hours until he reforms."

"Then let's use that to our advantage!" he said with a smirk. Ben propelled himself high in the sky and shot down scythe-like blades of water at the attacking Lenopans; the blades cut their bodies into pieces, and caused them to melt into a useless pile of mush. Ben grinned- the battle for the wedding was over.

"For once, rainy weather saves a wedding," Max said with a smile.


Ben honestly didn't want to attend the after party. He made a quick excuse that his body was pretty damn tired after over exerting himself.

"Same here," Ruby fake yawned. "I just wanna go back to the RV and take a nap."

Joel and Camille shared a look and smiled. "That's fine by us, then," Joel told them. "You two have done enough for us this week."

"Besides, I now know which family members to avoid!" Camille said cheerfully. "You two go rest."

"I'll walk em back to the RV," Carl offered. "I do wanna talk with Ben real quick."

Ben perked up. Usually when his dad had one-on-one chats with him, it was about the future or grades or whatever. So, what was it now? Carl walked with the two back to the RV, paused, and looked around.

"Ok, if Max asks, I took the tuxedo home," Carl said in a hushed voice.

"Why do we have to say that?" Ruby asked curiously.

"Because we're burning this ugly thing," Carl declared before continuing on his way. Ben and Ruby shared another confused look.

"Your parents are weird." Ruby stated.

Ben smiled. "Wanna make smores over the tuxedo fire?"

"HELL YEAH!"