Reviews:
BabySlothXYaoi- Ahhh, I'm so glad that you like Tyreese and his relationship with Rhys, I'm so excited release future chapters and explore their relationship. Aha, that hug was such a joy to write so I'm very happy it made you smile! The next few chapters are definitely more chill for some downtime. Thank you so much! Rhys definitely needs to get some control back, and yeah, as helpful as he can be to the group, he is still a kid. Honestly I'm loving your reviews, I feel very honoured that you take the time to write them. Getting a review always gets me hyped to write and get chapters out, so thank you! Anyways thank you for such in-depth feedback, hope you enjoy this next chapter!
First bit is in Rhys' head, then we're with Carl for the chapter.
Leaving the smoke of Terminus behind us, we get back onto the road, avoiding the tracks as we escape the chaos.
Carol pulls me aside at some point, handing me my Beretta 70 and Karen's bracelet.
"I found them with Daryl's crossbow. Don't thank me."
I don't thank her.
"This was with them too," Carol says in a monotone voice as she rummages through her pockets, pulling out the thing I don't want to see. A short, dull folding knife. Madeleine's folding knife.
Carol asks me if it's mine, and I say yes. Not sure why, but I do.
-Carl's POV-
After a long day of walking, we make camp in a dry clearing through some trees just off the roadside. I find a fallen log and sit on it, giving Judy her bottle of formula, something else Carol had swiped from Terminus. Rhys sits down beside me, choosing to lean against the log instead of sitting on it. Ever since we left Terminus, he's been quiet, avoiding eye contact as he watches the camp resting.
I listen to my Dad behind us as he talks to Tara, the new girl. I realize who she is halfway through their conversation. I can feel anger bubbling inside my stomach and an ache of something I can't quite work out. Perhaps it's sadness, or maybe I'm just hungry. As if reading my mind, Rhys passes me his half-eaten Big Cat bar. As I munch on it, I decide to forgive Tara. Something my Dad says to her calms the rage brewing inside me.
"That's how it works with us."
Tyreese and Carol leave together, announcing that they're heading to the nearby river that Daryl scouted. Tyreese gives Rhys a strange look before he leaves. Rhys doesn't see the look thrown to him because he's too busy staring at Judith, deep it thought.
"Hey!" Rosita calls, approaching us, kicking Rhys's red-stained sneakers. He jumps, looking up at her, confused.
She ignores his looks, "I'm checking the perimeter. Watch my back?"
Rhys looks relieved by her question. He nods, clambering to his feet, he waves goodbye and kisses Judith's forehead, making her giggle before he disappears into the trees after Rosita.
I sit on my own with Judy, shuffling when the tree log stops being comfy. I'm wondering why Rosita asked Rhys to go with her when Abraham has perched himself against a tree a few feet away, looking bored. Judith plays with my hand before reaching up and trying to steal my hat. Michonne sits on the ground next to my log seat, lightly punching my knee in greeting.
"Y'know, I keep reaching for my sword," she starts, "feels weird without it."
"Didn't you want to go back and find it?" I ask, tipping my hat back on my head slightly, so it's out of my sister's desperate reach.
She shakes her head, "May sound strange, but I feel kinda free with it gone."
"You're right," I tell her. She looks at me, eyes narrowed, unsure what I mean. "That does sound strange," I finish.
She laughs, hitting my knee again, this time a little harder.
I rub my knee and wait for her to be quiet, I decide to ask her about something I've had on my mind for a while. "You told me you were a monster. Before we went into Terminus, you told me that."
Michonne lets out a deep exhale. "I did."
I keep talking, watching Michonne as she watches me back, patience glowing in her dark brown eyes.
"And you said that we brought you back."
She nods slowly.
"But," I hesitate, "did the monster ever go away?"
Michonne thinks about this. Always one to take the time to think about what I say. Like I'm not just a kid asking stupid questions.
"No," she admits, "but It's not me anymore either. You learn to live with it, learn to be at peace with it."
"What if someone can't?" I ask her.
"I don't know," she tells me sincerely, "I had to."
Michonne pauses, "Is this about what happened with Joe's group?"
I wince, hating thinking about them. About what that man did to me, what he almost did. I shake my head in answer.
She pauses again, "Is it about Rhys?"
My mind goes back to the conversation she and I had before climbing into Terminus, how I'd told her about Rhys, how he made me feel. How I sometimes feel guilty for how he makes me feel. And that other feeling I get when I'm with him. The monster.
"Not like that," I tell her.
"Then what?"
"I think Rhys feels like we feel. He shouldn't, but I think he does, because of what he told those people."
She takes this in, "If he does, then he's gonna need your help."
"But I-" at that moment, Rhys and Rosita return from the forest, both of them carrying as many nuts as they can hold, a victory they must have found on their patrol.
Michonne pats my shoulder, getting up and taking Judith from me, she tells me, "You'll do fine. You already helped me." She takes Judith to my Dad, who's been staring at her from the other side of our camp.
Rhys comes over to me, offering me a nut. I bite into it and hurt my teeth. He's smirking at me, and it makes me feel proud.
"Are you sure they're edible?" I ask, rubbing my jaw.
"Give me your knife," he holds out his hand.
I hand him the knife, and he sits, leaning against a rock that's protruding from dried leaves and dead twigs. Rhys twists around and, using the rock as a table, cracks the nut open against the rock with the knife handle, more nuts falling out of it.
"Open," he tells me, holding a big piece out in front of my face. I open my mouth and stick out my tongue, trying to make him laugh. I feel even more proud when I succeed, and he places the nut in my mouth. I close, chewing on the fruit, trying to decide if I like it. I do.
"Better than trail mix," I tell him.
"I used to have these all the time back home," he eats some himself, a tiny nostalgic smile spreading across his face, "They're called English Walnuts," he says through a mouthful.
"Wrong!" Rosita shouts at him. Rhys responds by throwing a piece of walnut shell at her, which she dodges and flips him off, laughing at his bad aim.
"What was that about?" I ask him, cracking open another one the way he did.
"She seems to think they're called Carpathian Walnuts," he shakes his head and chuckles, "but you know what? She's bloody wrong."
"Can't it be both?" I try.
Rhys shakes his head, "Nah, Carpathian's can be bad news."
"Why?"
"They're vampires," Rhys answers.
We go quiet for a moment, the thought of creatures that feed on humans hitting too close to home right now. We instead listen to chatter throughout the camp. I watch as Dad tries to feed Judith a walnut, laughing when she takes it out her mouth and hides it in his beard.
I look back to Rhys, his whole body language different. He's slumped himself against the rock, his smile gone as he gazes out over the group.
"Hey," I get his attention with a half-smile, "I'm glad you're here."
"Me too."
Darkness settles over the camp, a dusting of stars lighting up the dark blue sky, faces are illuminated by the dim glow of the campfire that we all huddle around for warmth.
Now back from the water run, Carol speaks to Dad while Tyreese asks to talk to Rhys privately.
I sit on my own once again, enjoying the quiet, until a giggling Bob and Sasha sit beside me, filling Rhys's space.
"How are you, Carl?" Bob asks me, his voice musical and high pitch.
Not sure what the answer is, I tell him, "Good, I guess," which seems to satisfy him as he nods with a beaming smile.
"Are you drunk?" I ask him, thinking about how happy and stupid everyone acted back at the CDC.
"Drunk on life, baby," Bob laughs, Sasha elbowing him in the ribs.
"Right..."
"No," Bob answers me properly his voice still whimsical, "Abraham may have found those bottles of rum, but I gave that stuff up... I'm just happy Carl. Happy that we're all alive and together."
"Sasha on the other hand," Bob rubs her back lovingly, "Sasha decide to have a drink or two."
"I'm definitely, maybe, a little bit drunk," Sasha admits in a quiet slur.
Tyreese returns to the campfire, his arm around Rhys's shoulders, holding him close as they sit across from me.
"Can I do it now?" Bob asks Sasha, noticing the two return as well.
She shakes her head and shrugs, laughing to herself in a way I've never seen her laugh.
"If you must," she tells him.
Ecstatic, Bob jumps to his feet, a dirty water bottle in hand. I give Sasha a questioning look and she mouths the word, "Speech," at me.
"Attention, everyone," he calls out, "can I have your attention for one moment."
Everyone looks up at him. Sasha is hiding her head in her knees.
Once he knows he has everyone listening, Bob starts to talk, "We've all been through it. The last few weeks were hard." he looks at the faces staring up at him. "Real hard."
There's a moment of silence, which lingers while we wait for Bob to continue.
He does, "But we made it. I know that might not seem like much right now. But it is. It's everything," pausing again and putting a hand on Sasha's shoulder, Bob gestures around to us all, "we're family now, some of us met today, but that doesn't matter. We are family."
I look across the fire to Rhys, still under Tyreese's arm, leaning against him, he looks so distant as he listens to Bob.
Bob keeps going, "Sasha, she didn't think Terminus would work… she didn't trust that a good place could exist… she was wrong."
"Um… I think we all just saw that she was right…" People give murmurs in agreement with Glenn's objection.
"About Terminus, sure," Bob tells us, "Terminus was a bad place, but that doesn't mean they all are… there are other places out there, places like the Prison... I thought safe places were impossible until Daryl and Glenn took me back to the prison, showed me that life goes on and good people survive."
"The prison's gone," Dad is the one to speak out now, grit in his voice.
"I know," Bob's nodding, smiling too. "What I'm saying is that this, this right here, right now… this is where it changes. We've been through a whole lot of bad, which only means we're overdue a whole lot of good. We've been attacked by men with guns, walkers, even cannibals between here and the prison… we've lost good people. That stops now, because we will keep each other safe as a family, and we will find somewhere good as a family." Bob raises his bottle in toast, "We will get through this as a family."
Bob's speech has managed to bring smiles around the campfire, some giving hushed cheers to his words as they raise their own bottles in a toast.
Sasha is shaking her head a little bit, but Bob squeeze her shoulder, "I know you don't believe me right now, but we'll find something, and when we do I'm gonna marry you."
Sasha laughs at him in a kind way, "If you can find a good place then I'll let you marry me."
"I'll hold you to that."
I've been staring at Rhys for a while now, thinking about what Bob's been saying.
The camp is in high spirits for the rest of the night. Carol, Daryl, Tara, and Rhys being the only ones not to join in.
Tara is clearly still feeling guilty for being a part of the reason we're all out here, what Bob said about 'losing good people,' seemed to hit her hard. There's no way of knowing what's going on inside Daryl's head, although he had mentioned something about Beth to my Dad before we reached Terminus. He's just sitting with Carol, speaking softly. Rhys at least tries to join in, talking with anyone that talks to him. Talking and trying to hide what is bothering him.
As the fire dies down, the energy of the group does too. Dad tells everyone to get some sleep for an early start tomorrow.
I'm looking for a spot when my Dad grabs my arm, "Can I speak to you for a minute?"
"Sure, Dad," I answer hesitantly.
"What happened on the road, when I- when I did what I did."
"I get it. I get why you bit that guy's throat. You were saving us."
Dad nods. "Have you told Rhys?"
"No, I haven't."
"Why?"
"Because he's been through worse since the prison. He doesn't need to worry about me."
"Son-"
"Night, Dad."
I leave my father and head to the opposite side of the camp.
I find a space to lie next to Rhys, thinking about putting an arm over him but deciding I best not. I match his breaths in the dark. In and out.
"Carol killed Karen," he whispers.
My breath hitches on his words, falling out of sync with his.
"How do you know?" I ask him, trying to make out his facial expression in the dark.
"Tyreese told me. She told him. He says we need to forgive her. Says we need to live with it."
"Can you?"
"She saved us. She saved you," Rhys sighs deeply, "I can live with it."
"Can you forgive her?"
Rhys doesn't answer me this time, staying silent and hiding his face in the darkness.
I shuffle closer to him, our bodies just touching. I can feel his breath, warm and comforting against my face.
"I can live with it," he repeats.
I don't say any more, nor does he. We just fall asleep together beneath the stars.
A/N
Really enjoyed writing this. I love Bob's positivity, and how he can bring out the best in Sasha.
We'll be back in Rhys' head next chapter.
Reviews and Feedback are always welcome!
