Chapter 121: GCP: Part 1

August 27th

8:00 P.M

"Number 1: Starting today you'll be addressed by your cell number attached to your wristbands. The neckbands as well as the wrist band must be worn 24/7. If removed, you'll be shocked to the heavens. To enter facilities in the GCP, you must type in your number or call it out to our AI system.

"Number 2: Breakfast and Dinner start and end at 7. When we call lights out at 10 pm, nobody is allowed to leave their cells.

"Number 3: To reduce one's sentence, you must be hundred days in prison to start taking our rehab courses.

"Number 4: Those who hit our officers or guards will result in entering the Pretty Pink Room as punishment. Pretty as the name sounds, that place is hell on earth.

"Enjoy your stay here and treat this place like a second home. We have programs for those who want to continue school and such. Any questions?"

"Yeah, I got one." Richter raised his hand without hesitation. "As a Child of God, I cannot live in a sinful environment."

"Richter Belmont was it?" Papi looked through the papers. "From your history, you were a recent quote-I-quote, 'born again'. But you were caught drinking multiple times and even stole from a steakhouse and blew up a dojo. What kind of Christian does that?"

"God's servants," Richter said with a straight look.

"Oh. . . Fuck me." Ike groaned.

"If that's what you want, Cutie." Flamboyant Guard 2 winked over to the mercenary.

"Oh. . . Don't fuck me."

Papi ordered the perverted guards to attach their neck and wrist bands, labeled in four numerical digits.

They took their time to the point their breaths were breathing upon Ike and Richter's neck.

"Oh, Lord Jesus. Give me the fist to puncture this gay, thot-!"

(oOoOoOo)

"Prisoner number 6974, this is your new home." Flamboyant Guard 1 spanked Ike's butt into the cell. "Enjoy~!"

"At this point, I'm 'bout ready to unalive you," Ike said, with a set kit of things for his new jailhouse.

"Very funny, Cutie." The guard swayed his hips as he walked away.

The guard left, leaving the focus on his mysterious roommate. Not Richter, who was with a new cellmate.

"Mama. . . I got a new roommate." The cellmate rose from the top bunk of his bed and rubbed his eye.

Ike squinted his eyes and froze. "Makato?"

"Uh, who?" He yawned and widened his eyes at the tall man.

A heart attack was close if Ike didn't see the nonexistent chest. Apart from that, his bob of pink wavy hair, ocean eyes, and cream skin were almost identical. Even the below-average height. A lot shorter, in fact.

'Is this some kind of hallucination?' Ike walked toward the bottom bunk and tossed his things on it.

"Stareeeee. . ." The pink-haired boy said with his eyes glued to him.

"Do you want to die?" Ike glared back.

"You're pretty handsome."

"I know that."

"Are you gay?"

"Trust me, I'm straight." Ike walked past him now deciding to organize his things.

"I would be careful if I were you." The pink-haired boy grinned, tilting his head. "Saying the S word near an officer or a guard can get you in the Pretty Pink Room~"

"Yeah, whatever."

The pink-haired boy laughed and watched him unpack his things, twiddling his toes. "What's your name? What are you here for? Are you questioning your sexuality? Ooh~! What are your pronouns?"

"I'm a male." Ike grabbed his pillow and over-fluffed it, causing some of the feathers to spill out. "I'm a he. I do none of that. . . mentally ill stuff. Other than that, I'm Ike. I got here by a dumb mistake."

"Ah, that's cute. I love cute people so it can go either way."

Ike sighed. At least his voice wasn't a forced high-pitched Kardashian like Papi's.

"I'm Carly! It's nice to meet you, Ike." He smiled. "I wished my crime was as petty as yours, but at the same time, I'm grateful that I have only 10 years left. Before it was waaay worse! All because I killed my Mama."

". . ."

Killed who now?

"Yes, 10 years better than the death penalty or I'll be forced to kill Ms. Yanfei." He continued.

This baby doll of a face had-

'Anyone is capable of murder.'

Wise words from Ike's older self rang into his head, and all Ike could do in response was to say nothing. Never judging a book by its cover was something Ike never practiced.

"Please don't get scared. It was only self-defense." Carly stuck his tongue and giggled. "Mama conspired to kill me on our hiking trip. Before she got to me, I pushed her off the cliff."

"I see. . ."

"Pop goes her head!" Carly continued giggling. "When I looked below the cliff, blood was everywhere! Mama's head became a yummy watermelon crushed open! Ah. . . now I'm getting hungry."

After setting his stuff, Ike sat on a cold iron mattress and crossed his arms, staring at Carly. 'Great. A cold-blooded killer in my cell. . . wait a minute what would that make me?'

(oOoOoOo)

"Enjoy your stay, Prisoner number 6975!" The guard said.

"Oh my God, you're hot!" Richter's cellmate clung onto the vampire hunter's arm from the moment Richter stepped foot into his new home. "Hey, Sugarloaf~!

"What did you just call me?" Richter's eyes lost their sanity, glowing an intense red.

"Why this. . . fine, tall glass of testosterone, looking at me with such eyes, piercing through my soul! Ah~! My true soulmate!" He continued to touch him, now rubbing his chest with his hand. "Oooh~! Bitch! Such rock-hard abs! I wanna lick whip cream off of them nippies!"

His cellmate was as tall as him. Blonde with a ponytail. Fit. Muscular. The complete opposite of Ike's cellmate.

'This. . . perverted sinner has the audacity to touch me! I hope the trumpets sound right now!' Bold as the stranger, Richter clenched his fist, hoping his whip would appear inside his palm. It would make a good noose at this time.

'If he were a chicken nugget of a height, I'd bust his ass in a heartbeat. However, this guy is just as big and tall as me. As if they nick-picked our roommates. Clever, clever.'

"You may call me Avehkt. From this day forth, you're my husband- -ow, ow, ow~!"

"Unclean. Unwanted. Unnecessary creature from the pits of hell." Richter said, squeezing the life out of Avehkt's fingers. "I'm Richter. . ."

"Oohohoho, Richter! Tres bien! Nice to meet you, Sugarloaf! C-can you let go of me now, please?! I need that hand for my ma-"

Richter made sure he heard a crunch before releasing his hand, as Avehkt rolled on the floor, screaming in agony from his broken fingers.

'On second thought, maybe Papi is just stupid to put a weakling in the same cell as me. Hah! I'm breaking out in a month maximum.' Richter smirked, whistling to himself.

(oOoOoOo)

"Hey, guys! I'm so glad I caught up with y'all!" Richter laughed, waving over to Simon and Daisy.

"Huh? Aren't you supposed to be in prison?" Daisy arched an eyebrow at his sudden appearance.

Richter shrugged confidence. "Lock me up? Never! Escape was easy! Hahahaaa~!"

After the laughter died out, Richter glanced at the two, hoping to get a warm welcome of hugs and cheers, but something was off.

Simon crossed his arms. "Escape? Impossible. You're locked in a place far from Smashville. And nobody is gonna save a bunch of low-life criminals like you."

Richter sweatdropped at Simon's way of speech. "H-hey, Caveman, since when do you speak 21st Century?"

"I told you. . .," Simon walked up to Richter, placing his hand on Richter's shoulder, "long ago on the road, I got what they waiting for."

Daisy joined in with Simon, also placing her hand on Richter's other shoulder. "I don't run from nothing, dog. Get your soldiers, tell 'em I ain't layin' low."

"H-huh? What are you guys talking about? Soldiers? Dogs? Guys! Hey!"

"Gah!" Richter shot his eyes wide open to a pair of booty cheeks bouncing right in front of his eyes. A song played in the background of the entire prison, forcing everyone to wake up to Industry Baby.

An immediate headache struck Richter, as he grabbed Avehkt's butt. "Get your ass out of my face!"

"Oh~! Yes! Grab it harder, Sugarloaf!" Avekht continued to twerk on the wall to make his butt visible to Richter.

Richter's spirit screamed to the heavens, for he knew not of his limits at his time in GCP. If only he had his holy water and his whip- - scratch that- -a Glock would suffice.

"ALL PRISONERS! WAKE UP! IT'S TIME FOR A ROLL CALL! DANCE YOUR FRUITY ASSES TO THE FRONT AND LINE UP IN FRONT OF YOUR CELLS!" Papi called out from the intercom.

"That scream. . ." Ike yawned, slipping out of his bed. "Sounds like Richter. . ."

(oOoOoOo)

August 28th

7:10 A.M.

Cafeteria

Grope grope

Unsuccessful in finding Richter among the hundreds of prisoners, Ike grabbed his portion of breakfast and followed Carly toward the back of the cafeteria which was the least crowded.

Ike gazed at his breakfast in disgust. A handful of scrambled eggs, one piece of toast with a slab of butter, and oatmeal. The drinks were orange juice, water, and milk.

There was something that the former mercenary noticed amongst the prisoners. Different colored neck bands regardless of age. White and blue neck bands were the most common, and then you get the rare pinks and a drop of gold bands.

After taking their seats, Ike picked up his toast while staring at Carly's gold neckband. "Hey, why do people have different colors on their collars?"

Grope grope

Carly showed a mischievous grin, poking his spongy oatmeal with a spoon. "Our collars represent ranks in GCP. This is something that the guards nor the cops would tell you. It's part of Papi's. . . little survival game. When first arriving at GCP, all prisoners start with white neckbands. Whites are the Fresh Meat. Once you start taking the rehab courses, your rank in GCP can change either from Bottom, Top, or Industry."

"And what are those?"

"Blues are the Bottoms of GCP, the third rank of GCP. Bottoms are allowed to grope any prisoner below the Whites. Pinks are the Tops; the second rank. Tops can have romantic and/or sexual relationships with prisoners as long as there is consent. They can also grope and kiss without consent. Then you have the gold which is the number one rank of GCP. Prisoners that wear gold neckbands are called Industry. Industries. . . well, they don't need consent to have sex with you."

". . ." Ike's stomach began to turn from Carly's explanation as his eyes locked on Carly's gold neckband. Maybe it was the crushed fly that somehow combined with Ike's eggs.

Carly took a chug of his milk and placed the carton down. "Industries can access any prisoner's cell as long as Papi gives the okay. However, it cannot come from the women's division."

"I assume the gold is for passing their rehab courses or whatever. . ." Ike said. "And that can reduce your sentences to 10 years."

Carly nodded. "Yeah. . . Although, for someone as straight as a parallel line, I wouldn't recommend taking their rehab courses. Most of the tests. . . are enactments. . . if you know what I mean~"

"Just how many dicks did you have to suck. . .?" Ike sighed. "At this rate taking ten years off is impossible if you're not wanting to risk diseases."

Grope grope

"Bro, stop touching me! Is my ass a stress ball to you?!" Richter's face appeared with many strands of veins popping from every corner, turning to the groper behind him. All he wanted to do was to eat his dry breakfast and search for Ike. But since the past five minutes of standing in line, his right cheek was squeezed multiple times.

The groper was two times Richter's age with shaved blue hair, popping red lipstick, and long eyelashes. Tall and skinny like a pre-mantis.

"Bitch! I can do whatever, Fresh Meat!" The groper spat. "I'm a Bottom! Take a good look at my neckband! I don't need your consent! That's part of the rules in GCP!"

"The fuck. . .?" Richter couldn't comprehend what the groper said, and so far the guards that passed by Richter didn't stop it.

Of course.

This wasn't a normal prison.

"Ooh~! Pretty Peter is checking the Fresh Meat! He's hot!"

"Oh, my God! I want to become an Industry because of him!"

"Same! That ass is so fine~"

As prisoners were chatty about Richter's good looks and built, Bottoms, Fresh Meat, and a few Tops surrounded the former vampire hunter.

Richter gripped his tray and eyed the area of men. Lots of men, creeping into his personal space. More hands rubbed his arms, legs, and thighs, and five times the hands went for Richter's rear end.

"They're touching me why are they touching me I don't like being touched by something unholy," Richter mumbled. One of the Tops attempted a kiss from the former vampire hunter but soon dodged it.

Ike turned to the sudden commotion that was far from them, gazing at a sea of prisoners in their pink jumpsuits near the line where they got breakfast. "What's going on?"

"Looks like a Fresh Meat is being checked by Pretty Peter. He usually causes a scene so all the other prisoners can take a look. He's the type that likes to share." Carly said.

"Wait a minute. . . that's. . .!" Ike stood up from his seat and squinted his eyes, catching glimpse of brown, waving hair and broad muscles. One, because Richter was the kind of guy to rip his sleeves out.

Carly noticed Ike rushing over to the commotion and stood up. "Wait, Ike! I wouldn't go if I were you. You'll only get in-"

"I don't care. Richter needs my help!" Ike immediately went for a dash as he clenched his fist. This weapon. His hand was the second-best thing after his Ragnell when push came to shove.

"Great Punch Aether!" Ike's fist connected with the scrawny, flamboyant man, shooting him across the other side of the cafeteria while taking other bystanders with him.

"Ah! Where have you been?!" Richter grinned. "Man, I'm so glad to see you- -like- -I'm about to choke into tears right now."

"Save your tears when we test negative in this hellhole." Ike lined his back with Richter's and held his fist to his face. The prisoners roared from the excitement of the new prisoner joining Richter's side.

"There's another Fresh Meat!"

"He's hot~!"

"Bruh is that the only adjective you know?!"

"Number 6974!"

"Yeah, but they're freaking strong! Most of the men are dainty here!"

"Let's get his ass!"

The Tops and Bottoms teamed up, closing in the circle of the two ex-Smashers. Blows were being exchanged harder than ever. Pause.

It was just another sparing match. It was like the Smash Mansion to fight various players, but all of them were of the same gender and sexuality.

"Sir! There's a brawl with the new Fresh Meats!" One of the guards alerted the situation to Papi, holding onto his chest after his sprint toward the top-top part of GCP.

Papi watched the cameras with his pink fan and smiled. "Call the officers."

"Sir!"

After minutes of brawling, Carly stared from a distance, seeing blue uniforms, rushing into the cafeteria with their sticks.

"Uh oh."

One of the officers, blew their whistle, catching the attention of many of the prisoners.

"Hey! Break the fight or you'll all be joining the Pretty Pink Room!"

"The cops are here!"

"Run away!"

The fighting dispersed immediately leaving Ike and Richter standing. And there were also the out-cold bodies surrounding them.

"Put your hands on your head!" Cop 1 said, pulling his gun out at the two.

"It was self-defense," Richter said, putting his hands on his head, followed by Ike.

Carly pressed his finger on his lips and grinned. "Oops, I forgot to tell Ike one more thing about Fresh Meat. . ."

Cop 2 blew his whistle again while pulling out two cuffs. "Fresh Meat Rule #1: Fresh Meats- -aka, those with white bands on their necks- -are not allowed to attack those higher than Bottoms. Number 6975 and 6974 will be serving three days in the Pretty Pink Room."

The gasps in the cafeteria echoed like a dramatic movie. Then came the whispers and the murmurs.

"Wait a minute, nobody told us about that rule-" Ike said. He glanced over to Carly, who shrugged back at Ike.

"I told you don't it~" Carly laughed, walking away with his food tray.

"That little. . ."

"Heh," Richter smirked. "Anywhere is find but here. Take me, straight men!"

"We're gay."

"Ewww! Don't touch me!"

"Heh, you'll get a dick in your mouth sooner or later."

After being locked in cuffs, the two ex-Smashers were taken on their long walk to whatever this Pretty Pink Room was.

(oOoOoOo)

Smash Mansion

Dining Room

A week ago, Mario announced the new Smashers that were involved in the case to find the three princesses. All they had to do was go through some tests, but succeeding they did in such a short amount of time. A party was provided for the next few days, then it slowly died down to the issue that kept spinning Pit's head. The following day after Ike and Richter and Min-Min were sent to jail, and Robin was in a deep coma(?).

Pit sat in the dining hall along with a few other Veteran Smashers. It wasn't the same as before. Everyone would come and dine for breakfast provided by Kirby and Peach, but now it was more spread out. It was hard to tackle conversations unless Mario called for a meeting.

No, that wasn't it.

There was a reason for the sudden change in atmosphere in the Smash Mansion.

Everyone was afraid of Kazuya.

A new Smasher; now living under the same roof as them.

The angel had to do with what he had in front of him, and then find other potential people for his secret mission.

"Ok! Since Kazuya's not here right now, I'm just gonna say it!" Pit shot up from his chair, slamming his hands on the table. "Who wants to save Richter?!"

Silence erupted and heads turned to the kid angel.

"Y-you're joking, right?" Marth shook his head, folding his hands.

"No, I'm not! I'm 100% serious about this!"

Dark Pit scoffed, as he was sitting next to his twin. "Hello, Ass dumber than dumb! Kazuya is a Smasher! If he catches you saying that, you're dead!"

"Zelda became his slave for talking back to Kazuya!" Link exclaimed, holding back tears. "I. . . I don't know what to do. . .! He's dangerous!"

"I'm sorry, but I don't think all of us like Richter," Peach said. "Of course, it's just my personal opinion~"

"It is wise not to bring back trouble." Meta Knight said.

"G-guys! C'mon!" Pit whined. "Roy?"

Roy crossed his hands to an X. "Denied."

"Ike's in that prison as well, isn't he? You guys like Ike, don't you? BFFs?" Pit's eyes gleamed over to Marth's face.

"BFF as in Better Far oFF." Marth showed a dead gaze. "I always knew Ike would end up in jail one way or another. My answer is no, Pit. Sorry."

"Samus! You used to date Ike! Don't you wanna free him with me?"

"Did you not see what happened to Zelda?" Samus furrowed her eyebrows toward the angel. "Regardless, I'm not helping them."

Pit let out a groan, drooping his head. "You all are so fake! I'ma ask someone else!"

(oOoOoOo)

Nurse Room

"Look, Pit." Daisy was snuggled deep in her hospital bed while reading magazines. "I'm grateful for their help, but I'm tired. I just came back from Smash Mansion 2.0. I want to rest and eat Doritos and grapes! Simon's doing a real good just massaging my poor wittle feet, too!"

Pit observed from a few feet, as Simon was massaging Daisy's feet.

"Please! Richter's the only one that can help exercise that Witch!"

"Thou not a vampire," Simon said.

"She is too! Ughhhh!" Pit collapsed to his knees, crawling into an armadillo. "Richter's reputation is ass! All because of that Fake Chun-Li spreading gossip! Wait till I smash her skull against some concrete. That bitch. . .!"

(oOoOoOo)

"Richter's gonna be a grandpa in a diaper by the time he's out!" Pit mumbled, walking down the halls of the rooms.

"I'm with you."

Pit gasped, recognizing that chill voice. He then turned around to see black, curly hair and a pair of glasses. "Joker and the cat!"

"Please, call me Ren. I'm only Joker when I'm rizzed out." Ren adjusted his glasses with Morgana hanging on top of his head, appearing from another corner of the hallway. "I respect Mr. Ike. I want to help you."

Pit's smile faded away when he eyed his uniform. "Shouldn't you be in school?"

"Shouldn't you be in bed?" Morgana meowed.

"Don't make me trash the cat nip," Ren muttered. Clearing his throat, Ren shook his head at Pit's question. "There's a thing called online courses. I'm still a student while also being here."

"Cool! Killing two demons with one stone! Thank you so much!" Pit ran straight for a hug, squeezing his arms. "Now. . . who else?"

(oOoOoOo)

Makato's Room

"Miru, it must've been hard you for. At least Eleven is with Makato. I'm sure she'll be fine, but Robin. . .! He's dead!" Lucina cried, stuffing her in Miru's chest.

Miru froze, holding onto her shoulders. He had to pause filling up bottles of potions when Lucina came in.

"This potion will take two hours to complete." Makato on the other hand continued to mix her concoction in the witch pot.

'Robin. . . Did he really die? I mean yeah, he collapsed and everything but. . . I have a feeling he's up to something. . .' Miru stared at the ceiling, as his ahoge on his light blue hair, swung back and forth. 'Lucina could have gone to Marth, but me? This is quite my lucky day.'

Lucina sniffled her nose. "Marth-sama told me to cry my sorrows onto someone else, so I went to you as my last resort."

"What? I wasn't. . . your first?" Miru broke out from the hug in bitter tears. 'I knew this was too good to be true. . .'

"S-sorry! I didn't mean it like that!"

Miru paused for a bit, clearing his throat. "How immature of me. . . But please don't worry about Robin. . . he's still in the hospital, correct? I'm sure he'll be back on his feet in no time."

"Yes! That's right!" Lucina nodded furiously.

Miru sighed, turning to Makato as she continued to stir the same liquid on auto-pilot.

"This potion will take two hours to complete," Makato repeated.

"Oh God, I'd best change her settings. . ." Miru facepalmed. "Right now, she's not herself. . . She told me not to tell anyone, but you knew the moment you saw her. . ."

Flashback

One week ago

Makato sat by Miru, explaining the past events from the parallel Smash Mansion. Her powers awakened unto a whole new level of potion making and. . . her relationship with Ike. Miru stared into her purple eyes, mesmerized at her explanation, unable to utter a single word.

"Princess. . ." Miru gulped, now letting his dry throat get the best of him, coughing. He took a glance at her platinum white hair and opened his lips, "Are. . . are you okay?"

"Okay? What an abstract question," Makato laughed. "My body and mind are changing by the minute every time I make potions without ingredients, and headaches are getting frequent and more painful."

"Why not use a healing potion-?"

Makato grinned. "They don't work on me."

"Wait. . . what? Why?"

"Once I become whole again, the headaches will go away. At least that's what she told me. . . I must leave for Niho immediately."

"No, Princess. Don't do it. Your father-"

"From here on out. . ., she will be my replacement." Makato pointed to her clone that stood with her hands crossed like a maid, waiting by the large witch pot.

"I'll do my best, Master," Cloned Makato bowed slightly.

"Princess, y-you looked drained, and on top of that, do you really plan to take the other half?" Miru asked, placing his hand on her shoulder. "What if you can't? What if there's a chance you may kill your Father? There's a reason why he sealed half of your dark power inside of him."

"His reason is greed and nothing more," Makato spoke in an ominous tone, flashing some of her sharp teeth. "I wouldn't be getting these headaches if it weren't for him."

". . ." Miru closed his lips and removed his hand from her shoulder. It was a hard conversation. He didn't know how to respond. What more was there to say? If only he had more knowledge of this matter.

"Tweet! Tweet!" Miru-3000 vigorously shook his head, flapping in place.

Makato groaned, holding onto her head, and turned to the robotic bird. "I won't know unless I try. Don't worry, Miru. I won't kill my father by any means. It'll be a short trip. Please. . . don't say a word about this. Make it look natural."

"Master. . ." C. Makato frowned at her weakened state.

"How long will this potion last, Princess?" Miru glanced over to her clone. A perfect copy from the pink buns to the sandals on her feet.

Makato then got up from her bed and walked toward the middle of the room. "As long as she's not into contact with extreme hot or cold weather, she won't expire. She can only eat cinnamon rolls. . . because those are my favorite."

"Ooh! Master! How did you know I love cinnamon-rolled bread?!" C. Makato cheered.

"Princess, please reconsider!" Miru furrowed his eyebrows deep, standing up on his feet. "The darkness you so want is eating you alive! I can just tell!"

"Tweeet!"

Just after the tweet, the door swung open, revealing a new Smasher with brown long hair.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but. . . I couldn't help but eavesdrop." Eleven said. "If I were to come with her on her journey home, would that ease your mind? Solo rejected the potion I gave him since it came from you. . . so I want you to teach me. . . how. . . uh. . . to make it look more natural-like."

Miru crossed his arms. "Just add it in juice or something. . ."

"W-well yeah! A more hands-on experience would do the trick if I learn more from the potion princess herself!"

End of Flashback

"The way Makato acted like an AI when I first greeted her. It was too easy." Lucina said.

"At this rate, I'll have to teach her to act more natural. . ." Miru nodded.

"Makato!" Pit slammed the door wide open and dropped his jaw, gazing at Miru and Lucina.

"Well, this is something I wasn't expecting to see, but sheesh! Get a room! Oh wait, this is a room. . . but in Makato's room!" Pit said.

"It's not like that, Pit! Dumbo!" Lucina showed a dramatic eye roll, walking out of Makato's room. Before leaving her room completely, she glanced at Miru with a half-smile then continued off down the hall.

"Welcome in." C. Makato smiled, mixing ingredients in her witch pot.

"It was good while it lasted," Miru muttered, walking back to the table with the scattered empty glass bottles.

"Makato~! My favorite Smasher! Can you help us in our jailbreak?! Pretty please?" Pit folded his hands.

"A crime is a crime and those two need to pay for their sins," C. Makato said.

"Sins? What are you talking about?" Pit laughed. "Only Lady Palutena wipes our sins away, silly!"

"Tweet. . .?" Miru-3000 tilted its head.

"That's the god he serves," Miru muttered back to the bird.

"So, it'll be a two-man team, then. . ." Pit said to himself, pacing back and forth.

Miru gave a nonchalant gaze at the angel. "Are you serious about breaking Richter and Ike out of prison?"

"Duh! Of course, I am!" Pit then stopped and turned to Makato. "Also, Makato, you've been sounding a lot like an NPC. Are you feeling okay?"

"Aight, time for you to go." Miru dusted his hands before walking behind the angel, pushing his back so that his feet began to slide like a mop.

"Huh? Wait! I need potions for my operation! And this ain't your room!"

"As her retainer, your pressure on the Princess to help with criminals is not okay. Don't come back with such lunatic ideas of saving them from prison. Let them serve their time."

"Come on bru-" A final shove caused Pit to stumble out of Makato's room, followed by a crash against the wall. The door slammed behind the angel, and Ren watched from a safe distance, adjusting his glasses.

"Guess it'll be just the two of us." Pit hopped back on his feet and flapped his wings.

"We can make it if we try." Ren finished.

"Just the two of us. . ."

"You and I."

They stared into each other's eyes, bound over their newfound friendship.

Morgana side-eyed Ren, hopping onto his shoulder. "What the fuck are you guys doing?"

"I'm coming with you, cis-gendered males! It'll take more than a two-man team. You need someone with the tactics." F. Robin grinned from ear to ear, flipping one of her pigtails.

"Ah! Girl Robin! You horny-horny for Ike!" Pit cheered. "Why didn't you cross my mind?!"

"What a rude thing to say! I have you know angelic maidens like myself do not- -I repeat- -DO NOT get aroused!" F. Robin puffed her cheeks, rubbing a ring worn on her left pointer finger

Pit laughed. "Now I feel so much better now that we got some brains in the group. Alright, team! Operation Kill Bayonetta- -*cough* *cough*- -I mean Operation Prison Break!"

"Let's be logical about this and know our resources before we head to the prison." Robin interrupted. "For starters, most prisons have visits and whatnot. We'll start by requesting a visit and propose our plan to Ike and Richter."

"Right." Ren nodded.

"That takes too looooong," Pit rolled his head. "But alright. Let's go with your idea."

"It's not an idea. It's smart thinking." Robin said.

"Take us with you!"

The three-man team turned to two blondes, walking up to them.

Pit grinned from ear to ear. "Link! Shulk!"

"I. . . I want to help you guys." Link frowned. "If we can find someone as scary as Kazuya, maybe it will shift the power balance back to the way it was."

"So like. . . a murderer?"

". . .I mean. . . sure?" Link shrugged. "Anyone capable of killing would do."

"I feel kinda bad for him. . ." Ren said.

"Yeah, he's been feeling down since Zelda's been chained up," Robin said.

"Speaking of criminals, mates," Shulk said, rubbing his head. "I have a couple of friends that were wrongfully put in prison. When I heard that Richter, Ike, and Min-Min were being sentenced in GCP, it happened to be the same place where my friends were."

"Oooh! What a coinkydink!" Pit clapped. "Awesome! A five-man party!"

"Um, excuse me?! Don't you mean a four-cis-man party and one female?!" Robin scoffed. "The audacity to even call me a man is so unforgivable! I'll have you know that I got the best lawyers at my convenience to stop, drop, and sue for your- -oh my God- - your. . . your hate speech against me-! Catch me at civil court!"

"Can't we just kick her out of the team then? Problem solved." Ren said.

"HEY!"