Chapter 1 - Genesis
"Wolpert! Hodges! Back to Wolpert, Merlin he almost collides with Gudgeon! I can't believe I'm seeing such reckless flying from the Cannons, George!"
"Indeed, but will it be enough? Gebbins is determined to block that shot like he has done many times before, but Wolpert is coming from a very steep angle- WHAT A FEINT! Gebbins rolls in the wrong direction, misses the Quaffle, Hodges catches it, has a free shot on the goal- BLUDGER from Brown, but it's too late, AND HE MISSES! What in Merlin's name did I just see, Robert?"
"That would have been one of the most amazing scores I have seen during the entire '96 cup! And it seems the crowd agrees, they are doing the Merlin Round anyway! Cross your fingers for the Cannons, everyone! Well... I have to say I love the energy, George. It's like nothing can bring these folks down!"
"Very true Robert, but it seems the Chudley Cannons are indeed cursed to continue their career at the bottom of the ranking this season, although they sure managed to make the Arrows sweat there for a little bit..."
James Potter sighed as he switched off the wizarding wireless, turned his attention back to the stove and frowned. After a few seconds mulling over his meager household spell knowledge, he quickly realized the futility of his train of thought. He instead decided to vanish the burnt eggs and start from the top. Bugger Gamp and his Laws.
He didn't know what he had expected really. He had tried again and again to take his mind off the sword of Damocles that had been hanging over their heads ever since that night Dumbledore showed up on their doorstep, but not even his favorite Quidditch team losing could distract him for more than a few minutes. Instead, he had gotten stuck in yet more depressing thoughts so much he had managed to burn their breakfast. It didn't help that it seemed like everyone was acting like nothing was wrong, just continuing business as usual, even when they were on the verge of a bloody civil war.
Almost mechanically, his hands moved back to the fridge, grabbed another egg, and went to break it—his hands were shaking, he realized. James closed his eyes and took a breath. Panicking wasn't going to help them. But his brain regrettably wasn't one of pure logic. As he reached out again and his shaking intensified, he felt a hand clasp around his scarred fingers, taking the egg from his grasp. He looked to the side to meet his wife's somber emerald gaze. Even though it didn't reach her eyes, she forced a smile on her lips, as she gently caressed his hand, and then swiftly broke the egg over the pan.
No words needed to be said.
He didn't ask how her 'project' was coming along. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know the answer.
"Sirius just called," his wife Lily said as she removed her hand from his. His fingers started to feel cold.
"He's gonna stop by today and wants to show you something. From the way he was acting all mysterious, I guess he finally managed to fix up that rusty motorbike of yours."
James didn't know if she was trying to be funny, but he figured she probably wasn't in any better mental state than he was, so he cut her some slack. Lily had been barricading herself in her study for the last month at every opportunity, working tirelessly on some sort of plan. He knew it was important, but he had never asked for details, terrified of what they may entail, and she had never volunteered any.
As Lily left him to his thoughts, he returned to his second attempt at breakfast. Sirius was coming. Perhaps that would cheer him up.
Finally, with what his mother would have deemed a 'barely passable' creation in his hands, he walked out of the kitchen and began to set the table. He took a moment to stop and clear his head before facing the day. He listened for the distant humming of his wife upstairs, the rhythmic ticking of his grandfather clock, the soft giggles of a child which brought a small smile to his face, an angry noise from their cat Felix, and the gentle click of the front door.
Perhaps Sirius was early?
The Fidelius charm was a complicated piece of magic. Its purpose was to keep a location secret within the mind and soul of a single person. The spell was powered by the complete faith its inhabitants had in their secret keeper. Its greatest strength was at the same time its greatest weakness. Nothing could reveal the secret except the secret keeper, but only if all that was protecting the secret was the secret keeper. Any additional protections, wards, or spells would detract from the trust in the secret keeper, and thus weaken the spell, or at least, that's the way Lily had explained it to him. She even went so far as to remove the muggle door lock on their house to make sure the spell was as strong as possible. Due to this, nobody ever saw any need to knock at their door. Usually Sirius, Remus or Peter would just barge in and surprise them. Not that he minded, he needed any distractions he could get.
As he saw a ray of sunshine pass through the door into the hallway, and heard the birds singing from the outside, he took a breath and turned towards the entrance with a forced smile, but even that froze on his lips.
What looked back wasn't the familiar scruffy face of Sirius, but an all too familiar one from his nightmares, causing his blood to turn to ice.
"Lily! Its him! Go, I'll hold him off!" James yelled in panic at the top of his lungs as he dropped the pan and fumbled for his wand. He knew whatever Lily wanted to do, she needed time. However, the man in the doorway didn't seem too accommodating. His dark robes parted and revealed a pale wand clasped in bony fingers.
The air shivered, and suddenly the shadows seemed to lengthen. Even though he was standing in bright daylight, any small shadow around him seemed to grow more significant. The edges of the door frame, the folds of his robes, the shadow cast on the ground by his tall form, all of it suddenly looked almost alive, like something just past his perception was moving in it, even though nothing had visibly changed. But he could feel it. Darkness was gathering. He had to act.
James whipped his wand in a circular pattern and shouted "Confringo!"
An angry orange spell frizzled from his wand and raced towards the doorway.
The man smirked, as he swished his wand to the side, catching the spell on the tip of his pale wand, moving it like a conductor, as he flung the spell back at James. His eyes widened and he quickly drew an arc to summon a pale blue shield. The spell splashed into it, causing a bright orange flash, but keeping James unharmed. The shadows grew. The man smirked. James knew he did not have much time. He just needed a second to focus.
Twirling his wand, he transfigured the chairs at the dinner table into wolves, the table into a lion, and finished his attack by throwing another blasting curse, this time aimed at the ceiling.
The man snarled, as he realized that the spell wasn't aimed at him, and was forced to defend himself from the collapsing ceiling, as well as the ravenous animals. James knew it wouldn't be enough. But maybe it would buy him enough time for this. He focused on his magic, drawing forwards feelings of happiness, righteousness and love, pushing them outwards. The room seemed a bit brighter, but it was nothing compared to the darkness before him.
Drawing his wand in a complicated pattern, he yelled out "Iucidium Animae!"
The light around him condensed into his wand, causing it to glow brightly, and then burst out in a bright white bolt of light, screaming across the room. He knew it wasn't strong enough to break his shield, but it didn't have to.
The spell shattered against the man's golden shield, not even cracking it. White light burst outwards and bathed the living room in brightness for a second. Then it was over, the room was back to normal. The darkness had shattered. There was a brief moment of calm. However, the man hissed and the shadows started to creep back in seconds later. In desperation, James made to throw another spell, but the man was quicker. He threw his wand through a series of patterns, causing several colorful spells to race towards James. He dropped to the ground to dodge the first one, cast his blue shield again to block the second one, and directed one of his remaining wolves to intercept the third spell. He could hear a crash from upstairs- Lily! But that moment of distraction cost him, as a red spell passed through his shield and clipped him in the left shoulder, slashing right through and taking off his arm.
James cried in pain, but forced himself to focus. Any misstep would cause his death. He needed to last just a little bit longer. Maybe they would have a chance then.
He forced magic through his wand, and with years of honed reflexes, batted an incoming curse to the side, right at the full body mirror, which caused it to bounce off and towards the entrance, where it splashed against the man's shield. In despair, James realized that the darkness had already grown beyond what it had before. He had only seconds left at this rate. In a desperate last-ditch attempt, he tried to transfigure the rubble into a swarm of birds, which he sent to attack, but with a lazy wave of the man's wand, they turned to sand.
Just as James was about to cast the next spell, he watched with wide eyes as the darkness in the room was suddenly pulled inwards with a deep reverberating sound, gathered into the pale wand, causing it to glow and crackle with power, and he knew he had lost.
The glowing wand moved in an ominous jagged pattern as it started to shoot green sparks, and for the first time, the man spoke: "Avada Kedavra"
Blinding green light exploded out of the tip, which arced across the room in an instant, faster than he could blink. There was a rushing sound that somehow seemed to silence everything else as the green arcs blasted into him, throwing the rest of the room into disarray just as it threw him backwards.
His last thoughts were with his wife and children. Hopefully they would have enough time.
He was dead before he even slammed into the wall.
~V~
With erratic breaths, Lily tried to focus her thoughts. This was it. It was now or never. For months she had been reluctant on whether to involve James in this, and now it was too late. He was downstairs. James was fighting him. It was a plan born out of madness and desperation. If James had known what she was up to, he would have tried to stop her. But she was ready to pay the ultimate price.
She hadn't managed to bring herself to burden James with that idea, much less ask the same of him. Now her reluctance might cost her.
Everything was ready. She had set the room, she had the Ankh, she checked the stars twice. There was just one final issue. The math just didn't work out.
She planned to give a life to save a life. However, she had only one life to give, but two children to save. She had spent weeks of trying to adjust the ritual to maybe have some way of doing what she needed without involving James, but now it was too late. He couldn't help anymore.
It seemed Fate was dead set on forcing her to make a choice that no parent should ever have to make.
Harry or Iris.
Wringing her hands, the Ankh fumbling in her fingers, she stared at the crib, two pairs of eyes all too similar to hers gazing back in worry and confusion.
She had been dreading this exact moment for the last weeks, but her reluctance was what had brought it about. As tears tried to escape, she forced her mind into a state of pure logic using her occlumency.
This was not a decision she could make based on emotions.
What was she even doing here? By all reason this shouldn't work anyway. The Ankh had never been used like that. She had mainly chosen it for its symbolism. What if...
No. This was not the time for second thoughts. The noise downstairs had already stopped, he could come any second now, James might already be-
Choking down a sob, she refocused on her occlumency. She had one life to give, and had to choose one life to save. Maybe she would only have to save one life. But which one should she protect? Both of them were born as the seventh month dies, he might choose any one of them. But if she picked the right child, the backlash might prevent him from attacking the other one...
Harry or Iris?
As she heard a creak of the stairs, a final desperate thought entered her mind.
Well, the prophecy did speak of a him...
She knew she shouldn't take words of prophecy literal like that. But maybe, she hoped, he might.
She reached forward, held out the Ankh towards the boy, and Harry grabbed for it with his small hands.
This was the craziest stunt she had ever attempted with free ritual, but nobody had ever accused her of being particularly sane when it came to that.
The room was covered in strange utensils. There were several old symbols, a yin and yang, a crucifix, some hastily lit candles, and several seemingly unconnected trinkets that should have no business being in a magical home.
A blood transfusion bag, a Victoria Cross, an organ transplant list, items strewn across the room without rhyme or reason. And pictures, all over the walls, of people. Firemen and Scientists from Pripyat, engineers and crew members of the Titanic, policemen, soldiers, officials, all of them seemingly without connection, except for a common theme. She had been working on this room for months.
Usually, one would use a singular focus and an appropriate location to direct a free ritual. However, lacking both, she went for a hail Mary approach and pretty much threw everything and the kitchen sink at her attempt. The goal was to force Magic to recognize her intent. And throughout all of the gathered symbolism her intent could not be clearer.
Lily closed her eyes and spoke. Not with her voice, but with her magic. She needed Harry to be safe. She would give up anything in turn. It tore her apart to intentionally exclude Iris from her thoughts, but it was either this or they both would die.
The Ankh felt cold in her hand, it seemed to weigh as much as her entire being, as she presented it to Harry. His confused eyes looked back at her, tiny hands still clasping onto the golden relic, while Iris started crying in the background. There was no magic in the air yet. All she needed was intent. The whole room was primed for a singular purpose. She took back the Ankh and hung it around her neck, below her sweater. Then she placed a kiss on Harry's forehead and whispered:
"I love you, Harry"
Lily tried her best not to think of all the things she wanted to say to Iris too. She couldn't afford to split her intent.
All that was left to do was pay the ultimate price. To bribe the ferryman. But what better way to give her life to protect her children from him, than have the man himself commit the deed?
With the final part of her plan set in mind, she put away her wand, steeled her nerves and turned to face the door, putting herself between the crib and the man who had entered. He was already wrapped in darkness. It was time for her final performance.
She put on a terrified face, which didn't require much acting at this point, and gasped, then shrieked "NO! Not Harry! Please! He's just a kid, take me instead!"
The terrified redhead fully expected the man to just kill her right then and there, however she was surprised when he didn't move, but spoke:
"Step aside, you silly girl!" He hissed in a cold and terrible voice.
Why would he- Severus! That has to be it! Does that affect the intent of the ritual?
"No! I'll do anything! Please take me instead of him!"
"You don't have to die here tonight, foolish girl, step aside."
She grinned inwardly with glee. This was even better than she had planned. He was offering to spare her, and she just had one more line to trap him in a thrice bound promise. Not that he agreed, but he didn't have to. Magic had to. One more time she tried to goad him into attacking Harry instead of Iris.
"PLEASE! Spare my son! Just take my life and go!"
With her final cry, as she watched the wand move, she pushed with all of her will, imprinting her desire to save her son onto the world, and her willingness to give up her life to do so.
"Avada Kedavra"
Her body fell over, dead.
Lily was still here. She hadn't even noticed when she had died. Her soul was still trapped in the room. Now that she was dead, she could see the magnitude of what she had done.
The entire room was aglow with power, it had been crafted for a singular purpose, and the life she had paid, and the way she paid it, had managed to work much better than she had anticipated. The magic in the room sang to her, the ritual still bound to her will, just as she now was to it. Or rather, the Ankh.
The room was now her domain. She felt like she could move the furniture with a thought. The man was an annoying intruder, and the darkness he was gathering yet again felt like a stain on her soul. She wanted to tear him down for what he intended to do, but she wasn't sure if it would be enough. It felt like the best course of action was to let the man fall into the trap that their one-sided agreement had laid out. The magic of the entire room was sizzling in suspense, just waiting for an excuse to come to Harry's rescue, to strike down anyone who would dare to touch him, and most especially him.
The man stood in front of the crib, looking down with darkness oozing around him, and he hissed: "Is this some sort of twisted joke? This is supposed to be my enemy?"
He gazed from the small boy still sitting in the crib, looking up at him with frightful green eyes, over to the girl huddled into the corner, who was crying.
"Well, at least you're facing your destiny, child," he whispered as he looked back at Harry. Lily held her breath, figuratively, hoping against hope that her plan had worked and he would leave Iris alone. She was now completely without protection.
The man drew up darkness, much more than he had before, more than she had ever seen. The shadows came alive and wrapped themselves around him, causing the room to appear more like an eldritch hellscape, rather than the cozy bedroom with strange decorations that it was. Every corner, every edge appeared impossibly deep, and Lily was worried that if she got too close, she might disappear in one of them, despite her current state. A moment ago, she had just felt so powerful, untouchable; but in the presence of the sheer terror of this man, she felt insignificant.
She put all her hopes into the magic she had worked, and forced her intent into a singular thought: Save Harry!
A hissed "Avada Kedavra" was uttered and Lily was able to watch when time seemingly slowed down as a gigantic green lightning bolt exploded out of his wand, and bridged the gap towards Harry.
Magic screamed and in an instant, a splendid white shield emerged around the small boy, just an inch before the lightning could touch him. In this moment, both she and the man were forced to witness the first time in recorded magical history that an unstoppable force met an immoveable object.
The room exploded in color. Glowing iridescent tendrils of light and darkness lashed out in every direction, tearing apart the bed, the furniture, and most importantly the man. His shocked face was almost incinerated in an instant, as his body took the brunt of the backlash and was torn asunder by the forces he had unleashed. Lily's thoughts glowed in joy. It had worked!
However, her brief moment of celebration was cut short by a scream - Iris!
The wild magic was flooding the room, and while Harry seemed to be protected by the white shield, Iris was now falling victim to the very magic she had sought to protect them from.
No! Lily cried with her very soul. Protect her too!
She tried to force her will upon the ritual again, but it wouldn't budge. She slammed herself against the magic, struggling desperately to re-assert control. Magic, however, had other ideas.
The curse had been cast. A life must be taken.
Then take HIS! She pleaded as she glared at the still glowing form of the man.
But Magic was unyielding. One must die.
Still, Lily would not give up. With the last vestiges of control over the room she had left, she grabbed the Ankh from her corpse and flung it across the room into Iris' hands.
I don't care what I have to give up, but please don't let her die!
Lily prayed desperately; she didn't know to whom.
You've already taken my life, take my soul too if you have to!
She poured her very being into that last plea, figuratively wrapping her arms around Iris to try and protect her. She wouldn't let her daughter pay the price for her failure.
Something broke, and suddenly there was agony. What she hadn't felt when she had physically died now came back a hundredfold. Lily felt like she was crying. Iris was crying. The girl clutched the golden key in her arms like a lifeline, even as her small body was all but burned inside out. The Ankh seemed to catch fire and Lily felt her very essence being vaporized by what she had done, just as the golden key slowly turned to ash.
She could only hope that it would be enough.
~V~
"Frankly, Albus, the child should be dead. Well, both of them, if what you say is true, but just from her physical condition it's a miracle..."
Sad wrinkly eyes looked at the children in the hospital beds from behind half-moon glasses. "Will you be able to heal her, Poppy?"
"It will take time, but she has survived the worst of it. What on earth happened to her, Albus? I've never seen anyone be exposed to that much raw polarized magic of either kind and live, and it looks like she was somehow exposed to both?" the kind matron asked with worry in her voice.
A deep sigh, and then a frown "I can only speculate... Whatever Lily was attempting that night, I'm sure that's not what she had in mind."
"Well, they are both still alive, and if the boy really did survive a killing curse, she did somehow manage the impossible."
Madam Pomfrey reached for the tray to grab another potion, which she gently applied to the girls charred skin.
"Can you say if there will be any permanent damage?" the old man asked carefully.
The matron sighed, then replied "Well, unlike the boy's scar, none of her injuries are technically curse marks, so they should be treatable, however given the number of injuries... Even if she does physically heal, I worry more about her magic."
Dumbledore was silent as he pondered this. "I fear you may be correct. People have turned squibs from less exposure before," he said somberly.
"We will have to see if her magic recovers on its own, otherwise I'm not sure If I can still help her. We should keep her as far from any further exposure as possible."
"In that case, I think it would be best to send them to live with Lily's sister. What better way to keep her safe than for them to live in the muggle world?"
Madam Pomfrey frowned at that. "As much as I dislike the idea, it would probably help her recover..." She removed another potion and gently fed it to the sleeping girl using a spell to force her to swallow.
The headmaster looked back down and then smiled. V̵̛̲̍ǫ̴̗̔̅l̴̤̓̚d̴̰̃ẽ̶̝̉m̸̩̰͒ö̵͔͊r̶̨͒̆t̶͖̝͌̋ was defeated. It still felt wrong to even think the name. Perhaps there was some hope for the future after all.
A/N:
Disclaimer: In case the first chapter hasn't made this clear, this story is rated M, and it is not done so for reasons of smut—although it is not impossible that there might be some later on—the rating is simply a warning. This story gets progressively darker. Don't go into this story if you're not comfortable with other M rated material. This chapter is somewhat of a teaser to the later parts of the story, even if the following chapters might have you believe otherwise.
This story obviously has some AU elements to it, like the story being shifted 15 years into the future, and might heavily diverge from canon, but it should still look and feel like a Harry Potter story overall. I have around 80k words written already, at a current pace of about one chapter per week. I plan to post weekly or at least bi-weekly for now, in hopes I'll be able to keep up the pace.
Also, sorry if anyone got confused by the fem!Harry tag. Technically it isn't, seeing how Harry is also part of this story. However, I feel like many of you like myself might be searching for this tag in particular, and seeing how it would apply pretty much perfectly if Harry wasn't in this story, if you like that tag I think you might enjoy this story as well.
I created some accompanying chapter-art for a few chapters, that I might post to AO3, since FFnet doesn't work like that. I'll put the links here as well, but you'll have to manually type those.
This story takes some inspirations from other stories, which I plan to credit in the final chapter, for reasons of spoilers. For now, I'll just give massive thanks to Friss for helping me bounce ideas around until the worldbuilding made sense, and for providing early feedback on the story. Check out "Sleet and Hail" if you want to read a great fem!Harry which features an entrancing depiction of the Fae realm, where she acquires Winter Fae powers and grows up with them, only to return to Hogwarts very differently from how people expected.
Also please be sure to appropriately flame me in the reviews so I can improve.