Chapter 1
Tokyo Japan; July 13, 1951
Ellie Marie resisted the urge to bite her nails as she waited impatiently in the general's outer office. She fidgeted in her seat, earning her a look from his sour faced, middle aged secretary. The general had a reputation for making his subordinates wait. He'd set a meeting, and heaven help you if you dared to show up even a minute past it's scheduled time, yet he routinely left people waiting on him. He was the head of medical liaisons in the Asian theater though, so to get what she wanted, she knew she had to go through him.
It had been two months since she'd deferred her acceptance to Harvard Medical school, the only woman accepted in the entire country in her year, and signed up to fly halfway around the world to join the war effort. So far the only piece of the war she'd seen was the wounded boys who made it back to Tokyo General. It wasn't that she didn't enjoy assisting on the more complicated surgical procedures she saw there, but it wasn't what she came here to do. For the past month she had been making a point to bring up her desire to work at the front and her numerous credentials loudly and pointedly whenever General Brickland was in ear shot, and now that he'd finally called a meeting with her, she was cautiously hopeful she might get her wish.
She looked up quickly as the door to the hallway opened and a blond woman came striding in purposefully. She walked past Ellie Marie to the desk where the receptionist was and leaned over to speak to her quietly, before taking a seat a few down from Ellie Marie. After another moment passed she chanced a look at the newcomer. She was beautiful, with platinum blond hair and the kind of curves men went crazy for, but she carried herself with an air of strength and confidence that made it clear she was not to be trifled with. Ellie Marie also noted the oak leaf clusters on the shoulders of her dress uniform. She was a Major, impressive. The second woman looked up meeting her eye and they exchanged slightly awkward smiles.
"You're here to see the General as well?" Ellie Marie asked, hearing how stupid it sounded as soon as the words left her mouth. Why else would she be here? She had always been terrible at small talk.
"Yes." The second woman said, "have you been waiting long?" Ellie Marie rolled her eyes,
"Only about ten minutes, Which with General Brickland, is considered early."
The secretary shot her a glare but the second woman began to chuckle.
"He does love to keep a girl waiting, doesn't he?" She said.
"That he does." Ellie Marie agreed. The blond leaned forward offering her hand.
"I'm Major Margaret Houlihan Penopscott." She said.
"Captain Ellie Marie Lennox." She replied, shaking the Major's hand.
Before they could continue with any kind of conversation the office door opened, and General Brickland emerged, fixing them with his red rimmed eyes and smiling.
"Just the two people I wanted to see!" He boomed, as if their presence was a happy coincidence, not something he'd requested.
"Come in! Come in!" He continued, as he ushered them into his office. They both took seats in front of his desk and he went to sit behind it, leaning on his elbows and fixing them both with a very self satisfied look.
"First of all Margaret, I wanted to thank you for stopping in. I heard tell you were on your honeymoon. Congratulations."
"Thank you sir, and it was no trouble. I was actually getting ready to head back to the 4077th tomorrow." The Major replied.
"Excellent!" The General replied, "it seems the timing of this couldn't have worked out any better then!"
"The timing of what, exactly, sir?" Margaret asked.
"Major Houlihan, it's no secret that the 4077th has the best damned survival rate in all of Korea. You're the yardstick by which we measure M*A*S*H* success, and we all know your exemplary skills as a head nurse play a big role in that success."
Margaret blushed slightly looking down at her hands.
"Thank you sir. That's very kind." She said, "but truthfully it's the exemplary nursing staff I have under me that makes my job that much easier."
"An excellent segway into why I've brought you here!" Said the General, smacking his hand on the desk and making them both jump slightly. "I assume you have been introduced to Captain Lennox?" The women made nervous eye contact and nodded as he continued.
"Captain Lennox is one of our brightest and most talented nurses. She was accepted for the fall semester at Harvard Medical when she decided to join the war effort. She has been an invaluable help here in Tokyo, but it is her desire to join a M*A*S*H* unit. Yours was our first thought."
"As your well aware General, I'm always happy to add any new nurse's skills to our unit. I'm glad to have you aboard Captain Lennox."
"Well Major, and I want to preface that what I'm about to say has not been discussed with Captain Lennox, so it will be news to her as well. We have decided that Captain Lennox's unique skills, and M*A*S*H* 4077th's stellar track record, create an ideal scenario for us to test run a new initiative in management we are considering."
"What sort of initiative?" Margaret asked, flatly. Her whole demeanor had changed. It was obvious she'd already decided she wasn't going to like what she was about to hear.
"We think it may be beneficial to better divide the duties of command when it comes to the nursing staff, and patient care." He explained, "so we would like to implement Captain Lennox in the position we are calling Assistant Head Nurse. A working title of course. The idea would be that she would report directly to you, handling the day to day tasks such as schedule rotations, inventory, labs and cultures, leaving you free to focus on patient care, and elevating the efficiency of your nursing staff even further.
Maragaret's mouth dropped open. She stood and glared at him.
"I resent the implication that I am not capable of performing my duties!" She shouted, stomping her foot, "As you have pointed out my nurses are already the best in Korea, and I don't need my job cut in half for some Army experiment. And I definitely don't need to share authority with some fresh off the boat medical student!"
Ellie Marie wished she could melt into her seat and disappear. While there was part of her that was soaring with excitement over the fact that her wish was finally coming true, she seemed to have earned the disdain of the woman who would be her direct superior before she ever hit the ground, which was less than ideal. The General stood up to match the Major.
"Despite what you may believe, Major, this was intended as a reward for your stellar performance, not a punishment. I am giving your unit one of the best nurses in Asia currently, second only to possibly yourself. It would behoove you to utilize her well instead of instantly rejecting her because you feel threatened." The Major gasped indignantly but he cut her off.
"Either way." He said, "she will be on the transport with you tomorrow whether you like it or not."
The Major gave him one more furious glare before turning on her heel and storming out the door. Ellie Marie looked back to the General, who gave her a small half shrug of sympathy.
"You're the one who wanted into Korea so badly." He pointed out, "Good luck."
Uijeongbu Korea; July 14th, 1951
Ellie Marie grabbed the edges of the jeep to steady herself as they hit another pothole. It felt like the jeep might topple over at any second. The ride from Seoul Air Base hadn't exactly been pleasant, but it was a far better than the plane ride from Japan. At least in the jeep the roar of the wind and the engine gave the women an excuse to not interact. Major Houlihan had not spoken one word to her since the General's office, not even on the six hour plane ride. She knew the Major was angry at her presence, but she was beginning to think there was something else bothering her as well.
As they made another turn, a small cluster of canvas tents appeared in front of them, with only one large building that they all seemed centered around. She realized she was finally getting her first glimpse of a M*A*S*H* unit. They drove down the dirt road between the tents and as their brakes squealed to a stop, a small man who was headed toward the center building turned to see who had arrived. He had curly brown hair mostly covered in a khaki beanie, and coke bottle glasses. When he saw Major Houlihan his face broke into a smile.
"Major Houlihan is that you?" He said, walking towards them.
"No, it's Amelia Earhart. Who do you think it is?" She snapped.
"You." He answered.
"Oh you dumb ninny!" She mumbled, turning to grab her bag.
"How come you're back so early from your honeymoon?" He asked.
"You're not my father." She grumbled.
"No Ma'am." He said, nervously pushing his glasses up his nose, "I sure am glad to see you though. We got a terrible lot of wounded and Major Burns isn't back from R yet."
"He isnt?" She said, pausing for a moment at the news but then she quickly recovered, shoving her suitcase at him, "Alright, We'll get changed and get right over." She shot a look back at Ellie Marie. .
"Corporal this is Captain Lennox. She'll be joining our unit." She said. The Corporal turned and flashed her a warm smile.
"Wow a lady Captain." He said, "We've never had one of those before. All our nurses are Lieutenants, cept the Major of course. Both our Captains are men. Oh I'm Corporal Walter O'Reily by the way, but you can just call me Radar. Most everybody does. I'm the company clerk around here, if you need anything I'm your guy!"
"Good to know Radar." Ellie Marie said with a smile, his rambling was very endearing, "and you can call me Ellie Marie ."
"Very pleased to meet you Ellie Marie ." He said, grinning at her.
"If you're quite finished, I'd like to get scrubbed in now and actually help. I'd think you would too since that's why you're here." Snapped the Major. Ellie Marie jumped slightly and rushed to follow her.
A few minutes later her stomach was a jumble of nerves as the Major pushed open the doors of the O.R. At first all she saw was bright light and white, as her eyes adjusted she realized she was looking at an operating room barely bigger than General Bickford's office, crammed with four tables, only two of which were in use. A man with a cross around his neck that delineated him as chaplain looked up.
"Major Houlihan!" He said cheerfully, and the surgeon on the far end looked up as well.
"Look who's here!" He proclaimed.
"What a pleasant surprise." The chaplain added.
"Uh oh. Lulu's back in town." Said the tall man closest to them, whose hands were currently in a man's chest cavity.
"Keep working. keep working" Maragaret said, in an exasperated voice, as she walked to his side.
"I'll take over Baker, you look exhausted." She said, relieving the nurse assisting him.
"Mrs. Penobscott it's a pleasure to have your finger in my work again." The surgeon said, "How come you're back so early? Shouldn't you be wearing out your Do Not Disturb Sign?"
"Heard you were busyâ" she said vaguely.
"Major, I heard you were back." Said a short, white haired man who had walked in from the other end of the room.
"Baker, get back in here and help Colonel Potter!" Margaret snapped, but as the exhausted nurse turned back, Ellie Marie stepped up.
"I can help him, Major." She said carefully, "It's why I'm here, like you said."
Margaret gave her a slight look but then nodded in agreement. Ellie Marie walked over quickly and began organizing the instruments by the empty table.
"And who might you be, little lady?" Said the man she now knew was Colonel Potter, as a corpsman brought a patient to their table.
"Captain Ellie Marie Lennox sir." She answered.
"She's our newest nurse." Margaret explained tersely.
"Ah! a new nurse you say." the surgeon beside Margaret said, shooting Ellie Marie a sly look. "I do love a quality new nurse."
She couldn't see much of him in the surgical get up, but he was tall and lanky with bright blue eyes and dark black hair.
"And a Captain to boot." He continued, "you hear that Beej, we've got another of our ilk in the ranks."
"Come on now Hawk, let's get to know her a bit before we hit her with those kinds of insults." Said the even taller man at the last table on the row.
"Can we please have a little more focus in here!" Snapped Margaret.
"Of course, you're right Margaret. Let's get back to the task at hand." Said the dark haired surgeon somberly, "So tell us about your honeymoon." He added, earning him an eye roll.
"Just the dirty stuff." Quipped the second Captain.
"Captains please!" Chided the chaplain, "Mrs. Penobscott's feelings!"
"That's what we want to hear aboutâ.." retorted Captain number one.
The doors opened again and a nurse carrying several x-rays walked in.
"Private Picetti, X rays hot off the press!" Said the person that Ellie Marie realized with a start was not in fact a nurse, but a swarthy copper skinned man in a classic nurses uniform. He looked up and his large brown eyes met hers, alight with curiosity.
"You're new." He said.
"Good eye." She retorted.
"What's a girl like you doing in a place like this?" He quipped with a smile.
"Could ask you the same, doll face.' She shot back, and then immediately regretted it. She had a tendency to say the first thing that came to mind when she was nervous and he'd caught her so off guard. She looked up to see if she'd insulted him, but she could tell he was grinning even through his mask.
"I like you." He said pointing a finger at her, "Got no clue who you are, but I like you." He noticed Margaret, and clapped a hand dramatically over his heart.
"Gloryosky Sandy! Do I behold the ravishing Mrs. Penobscott?" He said.
"Yes Klinger, I'm back. So get moving." She said dryly.
"Yes Major Houlihan!" He said with a snappy salute, and he exited the room quickly.
"Wow Captain Lennox jumping right into O.R. and breezing through your first encounter with Klinger. You seem like someone who might be fun to have around." Captain one said with a wink, "You should join us in the Swamp later for a drink."
"The swamp?" She muttered questioningly, and Colonel Potter chuckled, "it's the name of their domicile. Don't worry, it's marginally better than the title implies."
"Now back to the topic at hand." Captain one announced, "Margaret I understand if you don't want to tell us about your honeymoon."
"Thank you." She said.
"But I hope you took pictures." He added, earning him a glare.
It was several hours later. After they'd finished the O.R. session the nurses had taken her back to their tent and shown her to her bunk. She liked them a lot. They were all very sweet and friendly. She'd worried they'd resent her coming in and being in charge of them immediately but she quickly realized they were happy to put any degree of separation between themselves and Major Houlihan as far as leadership was concerned. Her favorites so far were Bigalow, who seemed to have the same pension for saying whatever came to her mind that Ellie Marie did, and Kelly who just might have been the sweetest person she'd ever met. Spending a few hours with them had her feeling more positive about the prospect of living there.
She exited the tent, on her way to take the other Captains up on their offer of an evening drink, and almost walked directly into the swarthy stranger from earlier, now dressed in a black tea length evening gown, an army helmet, and carrying a rifle. When he saw her he gave her another smile. She could see his whole face now, he had a prominent beaked nose at odds with his other features, but a kind smile.
"Ah, Captain Lennox we meet again." He said.
"Klinger right?" She said, hoping she was remembering correctly.
"You got it." He said, "Corporal Max Klinger, at your service."
"So Corporal Max Klinger..." She said, giving his outfit a pointed once over, "You know I gotta ask." He laughed.
"Just your run of the mill Section 8." He said with a shrug, "If I were dresses long enough, the Army will eventually admit I'm crazy and send me home."
"That's an inventive one, I'll give you that." She replied, "Where's home?"
"Toledo." He replied, sounding wistful.
"No kidding?" Ellie Marie said with a smile, "I'm from Western Pennsylvania, but I have family in Chicago, so I've passed through Toledo dozens of times!"
"Well how bout that." Klinger said, "Small world isn't it?"
"Sure is." She agreed.
They looked up as a tall balding man walked through the door of what she now knew was the Swamp, and towards the main building.
"Who's that?" She asked.
"No clue." Klinger answered, "You new people are popping up like sand fleas on a camel today."
"I think he was at Tokyo General with me." Ellie Marie said, cocking her head as she tried to remember if he was the same man she'd seen in the halls.
"If he was, that'd be an even smaller world." Klinger pointed out.
The door of the Swamp opened again and the dark haired Captain whose name she now knew was Pierce leaned out motioning to her.
"Seems like the Captains Club is now in session." Klinger said, nodding to her as he turned to walk away.
"It was nice to officially meet you Corporal." She called after him.
"And you, Captain." he replied.
"Call me Ellie Marie ." She said.
"Only if you call me Klinger." He said.
"You don't like people to call you by your first name?" She questioned.
"Sure I do. people around here just don't. Guess I've just gotten used to it."
"Well I'd rather call you Max if it's all the same to you then." She said. He smiled in response and tipped his helmet to her before walking away.
She crossed the small distance between her tent and the Swamp, where Pierce was still holding the door open, giving her a charming grin. She took stock of the features that had previously been covered by the surgical mask. The bright blue eyes were accompanied by a button nose and a friendly if not somewhat thin lipped smile. He was tall and lean, on the verge of gangly but he made it work.
"Glad to see you decided to take us up on our offer." He said, as he stepped back, allowing her entry.
The Swamp was the largest of the bunk tents, located directly in the middle of the compound, and in the summer heat,z it seemed they preferred to have the tent flaps up, giving the entirety of the camp a view of the inside through the thin mesh interior walls. There were cots in each of the four corners and a currently unused stove in the center. It seemed as though only the cots on the right side of the room were in use, though she noted the suitcase on the bed of the front left cot and assumed that must be where her fellow newcomer was intending to sleep. Between the right two cots, sat a large machine made of twisted copper coils and what looked like specimen jars. She pointed to it.
"Is that a still?" She asked.
"Best one in Uijeongbu." Answered the second Captain, from his place on the far right bunk, where he poured clear liquid from a beaker into a martini glass.
The nurses had told her earlier that his name was B.J. Hunnicutt, and she had a feeling, just from the few interactions she'd had with him, that he was the sort of person she would like. He was around the same age as Pierce but with sandy brown hair on a slightly receding hairline, and a large walrus type mustache that added to his goofy but endearing persona.
"Let's start with some less formal introductions shall we?" Said Pierce, handing her the martini and motioning to a folding chair, "This is B.J. Hunnicutt and I'm Benjamin Pierce, but you can call me Hawkeye. Everyone does."
"Hawkeye?" She asked, taking the seat, "Like Last of the Mohicans?"
"Very good Captain." He said grinning, "most people don't pick up on that right away."
Ellie Marie took a sip of the martini and coughed. It tasted like lighter fluid laced with pine.
"Smooth." She rasped, and both men chuckled.
"We make due with what we've got around here. Also I notice we haven't gotten a first name from you yet." B.J. said, pouring another glass for himself.
'Oh right. Sorry about that." She said, setting the drink down. "It's Ellie Marie.
"Ellie Marie." Said Hawkeye wistfully, as if he were savoring it, "I love a good double name, and yours is so musical to say. Ellie Marie."
He said it the second time with flourish and grin, and she fought the urge to roll her eyes. He was a smooth operator to be sure.
"So B.J." She said, turning to him, "What's that stand for?"
"Don't get him started!" Hawkeye cut in rolling his eyes, and making B.J. laugh again. She raised a questioning eyebrow.
"It doesn't stand for anything." B.J. explained.
"Really?" She asked in disbelief.
"Really really." He replied.
"I don't believe it either," Hawkeye grumbled, "but it's been two months and he's still sticking with that story."
"You've only been here two months?" She questioned, and B.J. nodded.
"Quite the turn around in this place isn't there?" She said.
"That's war for you." Hawkeye said, and she noticed he was glaring at the suitcase on the empty bed across from his.
"Yeah, I saw you had a newcomer on my way over." She said, "is he here to replace the other Major who's AWOL?"
"My my you are quite caught up for only being here a few hours." B.J. commented, and she shrugged.
"Nurses talk." She said simply.
"He's here temporarily as of now." B.J. explained, "until Colonel Potter can find a butterfly net big enough to catch Burns."
"Never thought I'd see the day when I was hoping for the return of Frank Burns." Hawkeye grumbled.
"I take it you're not a fan of the newcomer?" She asked.
"I've never been able to stand his type." Hawkeye said, swigging another martini, "coming in here from Tokyo with an ego the size of the 38th Parallel, talking about his money and his expertise. Like just because he studied at Harvard and family came over on the Mayflower he's so superior."
"I knew it!" Ellie Marie said, "I knew I recognized him. He was one of the thoracic surgeons in Tokyo General. Oh it must be killing him to be in a place like this." She giggled slightly at the irony.
"You were at Tokyo General before here?" Hawkeye asked, "Why the hell would you leave a cushy spot like that, to come to a dump like this?"
"Because I signed up to work in a dump like this. I wanted to be on the front lines, in the thick of it, helping the boys when they really need it." She said.
Hawkeye turned to B.J. with a shocked, somewhat disbelieving look.
"We better watch out for her. She just might give Klinger a run for his money in the crazy department." He said.
"Yeah what's the deal with him anyway?" She asked, since Hawkeye brought it up, "is he actually crazy?"
"Just crazy about not being here." He replied, "he's been running that cross dressing gag since day one. Hasn't gotten him anywhere yet, but we all have our hobbies. The ironic thing is that outside of the dresses, he's actually an excellent corpsman. You think if he really wanted out that bad he'd bungle things a bit more."
"Hawkeye?" Kelly had popped her head in the door. He looked up.
"Just wanted to let you know Dr. Berman's blood pressure is still dropping." Kelly said with a sympathetic look.
"Damnit." He said, putting his palms to his eyes, "Ok Kelly. Thanks for letting me know." She nodded sadly and walked out.
"Is that your chest case?" Ellie Marie asked, and he nodded,
"I fixed the damage to his left ventricle but all signs since we moved him to Post Op, point to a ventricular aneurysm." He explained.
"So he needs a ventricle stenosis?"
"He will if it continues." Hawkeye confirmed, standing and pacing as he spoke, "the problem is that's new territory and none of us here have even seen it done, much less done it ourselves."
"I've seen it done." Ellie Marie said, "in fact I've assisted on several, and attended a lecture on the procedure a month ago in Tokyo. I know that isn't really all that helpful, seeing as I'm not a surgeon, but."
"Are you kidding? That's completely helpful!" B.J. said enthusiastically, "we just went from going in blind with notes from a lecture to having the help of someone who's witnessed the procedure."
"I hope this doesn't come across as ungrateful, because I'm most certainly not, but what is a nurse doing attending lectures on ventricle stenosis procedures?" Hawkeye asked.
"Before I came to Korea, I was enrolled at Harvard Medical School." Ellie Marie explained, "I hope to be a surgeon myself someday and I figured I might as well pick up as much knowledge as I can while I'm here."
"A female surgeon." Hawkeye said, "I'll admit it, you've impressed me, Captain Lennox."
"Well...let's see how well I actually perform before you go putting me on a pedestal, Hawkeye." She responded, "intentions are one thing, actions are a whole other ballgame."
The next morning Ellie Marie was on her first shift in Post Op, shadowing a still very prickly Major Houlihan. Much to her frustration, it seemed the more the other members of the camp welcomed her, the more the Major pushed her away. She was beginning to wonder if this arrangement had any hope of being successful.
"Captain did you hear what I just said?" Snapped Margaret. She jumped, looking at her apologetically. The Major sighed.
"I was just explaining that everything you need to know about each patient is here on their chart. Medications, allergies, any known infections or complications." Margaret continued.
"Yes Major." Ellie Marie replied, "We have similar charts in Tokyo, so I think I'll be able to keep up."
"Well unlike Tokyo, we have a lot quicker turn around of wounded here, so the schedule of transports and case priority is something of utmost importance." Margaret replied, "See this green mark? It means this man is ready for transport, the number beside it indicates where he is headed to.1 indicates highest severity, he's stable but he's headed to Tokyo for further care. 2 means Seoul for a longer period of recovery and rehabilitation. 3 means he's cleared to return to combat. Got all that?"
"Yes, Major." She responded.
"Now the color coding with the numbers are as follows. Green 3 as I stated is cleared for combat. Yellow 3 is still not yet stable enough for travel, but expected to recover. There is no such thing as a red 3 because if a patient is red, his likelihood of returning to combat is low. If you see a chart marked red 1, well...I assume you understand what that means." Ellie Marie nodded somberly.
"Margaret don't let her in on all the fun at once, she'll be bored in a week." Quipped Hawkeye, stepping between them to grab the chart.
'"If you don't mind, I am trying to train a new member of my nursing staff." Margaret huffed.
"And I'm trying to do this little thing called patient care." Hawkeye shot back as he signed the chart. "There you go Private, you're all set to head out in a few hours. Try not to catch anymore shrapnel with your shoulder alright?"
"Dr. Pierce!" called a nurse named Ginger, from the other end of the ward. Ellie Marie made a mental note that in here he wasn't Hawkeye, before she and Margaret followed.
"It's Dr. Berman." Ginger said, "his pulse is thready and his blood pressure is dropping like a stone."
"The aneurysm?" Asked Margaret.
"Looks that way." Hawkeye said, "I don't have a choice, I'm going to have to go in."
"You can do it." Ellie Marie said encouragingly.
"Excuse me. I couldn't help but overhear. Did you say this man has a ventricular aneurysm?" Said the tall newcomer. She'd learned earlier in the day his name was Major Charles Emerson Winchester, and he was every bit as pompous and egotistical as Hawkeye made him out to be.
"You heard correctly." Hawkeye said snippily, not taking his eyes from the patient.
"And what exactly is the panic?" Winchester asked, "the procedure to reverse it is rather straightforward." Hawkeye's gaze shot up.
"You've done this procedure before?" He asked.
"Dozens of times." Winchester replied cooly.
"Alright then. Let's get him prepped." Said Margaret, "I'll assist you."
"Actually Margaret." said Hawkeye and his eyes shifted to Ellie Marie. Once again she wished the floor would swallow her, this was not going to put her any closer to Major Houlihan's good side.
"Major...I've assisted in this surgery several times at Tokyo General." She explained meekly, afraid to meet the Major's eye. When she did look up, she saw the fury brimming there, but it was at odds with something else. After a moment she shut her eyes and sighed.
"Fine. Go scrub in." She said, and walked towards the O.R.
A half hour later Ellie Marie, Major Houlihan, and all four of the surgeons were crowded around an operating table. The others hadn't wanted to miss the opportunity to see the procedure in action.
"Clamp." Winchester said, and she handed him one quickly as he deftly identified the small aneurysm.
"So I couldn't help but notice you mentioned Tokyo." He said, holding his hand out for another instrument, "I just came from there myself."
"I know." Ellie Marie responded, "I recognized you when you pulled in. I've seen you at the hospital. I was on Dr. Allgood's team."
"Allgood." He scoffed, "sanctimonious old goat. Your skills are much too refined for him. When we both receive what I pray is a speedy relocation to Tokyo, give my people your name and I'll have you transferred to my team where your skills will be better put to use."
"I don't have plans to return to Tokyo anytime soon Dr." Ellie Marie responded.
"Better you than me." He grumbled, "More suction."
"Now the main difficulty gentleman." He continued, "is that the aneurysm may have a clot in it. If you don't do this very carefully, it could break off and go to the brain."
"Then it's goodnight Charlie. Sorry, Charles." Said B.J. emphasizing the last word with a high brow accent that earned him a glare from Winchester. He wasn't much more of a fan of Winchester than Hawkeye.
"Beautiful Doctor." purred Margaret from Ellie Marie's left and she rolled her eyes slightly. Of course Margaret would be the type to swoon for his pomposity and bravado.
"And Voila. Ready to close." Winchester said, raising his hands.
"Fine work Doctor." Colonel Potter said.
"Under the circumstances I would say extraordinary." Winchester replied, as he took off his gloves and mask. Ellie Marie saw Hawkeye bristle.
"Oh Major Winchester, may I ask a question?" He said, his voice dripping with false sincerity.
"You may." Winchester answered, completely oblivious to his tone.
"May I stop by sometime to borrow a cup of ego?"
Winchester looked at him, seemingly nonplussed, as if Hawkeye wasn't worth his time, and then turned to head back into the scrub room. Tess picked up the 4.0 silk and began threading the needle to close the chest.
"The nerve of that guy." Hawkeye seethed, taking the needle from her.
'"You have to stop letting him get to you like that." She said, and he looked up at her incredulously.
"Not let him get to me? Every word out of that man's mouth is a testament to the monument that is his own self inflated ego, and I'm just supposed to let it go?"
"What other choice do you have?" She countered, "seething and being combative isn't going to change him, it's just going to make you miserable and he'll keep being exactly the same."
"She's got a point, Hawk." Said B.J. who was collecting used implements in a bucket for sterilization.
"Yeah...but what does she know." grumbled Hawkeye.
She knew he hadn't meant what he said literally, and he was just being petulant because she was right, but his words annoyed her anyway.
"Being that I was the only female accepted to Harvard Medical school this year, and one of only thee who was pre med at Brown my full four years there, not to mention my stay at Tokyo General, I'd say I know quite a bit about putting up with the opinions of the Charles Emerson Winchesters of the world." She retorted. Hawkeye looked up at her, and his gaze softened.
"Yeah I reckon you probably do." He said genuinely.
"Look. He's always going to be richer than you, with a better education, and yes maybe even better technical skills, but he lords those things over others because they're what make him feel significant. If you think about it in the grand scheme things, it's kind of sad. He has to make others feel small in order to feel relevant. Once you understand that, it's easier to ignore him."
"Do me a favor." Hawkeye said, "stick by me and repeat what you just said intermittently for as long as Major Windbag is around ok? It may actually keep me from throttling him with his own shoe laces."
"Hey Captains!" Radar said, running into the O.R. breathless. "Colonel Potter wants you in his office! He got a call, they finally caught Major Burns!"
Both Captains' faces lit up with glee.
"Are you ok to get Dr. Berman back to Post Op?" Hawkeye asked, practically bouncing with excitement. She nodded and they ran out the O.R. doors.
--
The next morning Ellie Marie sat in the mess tent pushing a bowl of thick gray oatmeal around with a spoon. The food definitely left something to be desired.
"I wish I could say it gets betterâ.but you get used to it at least." Said Bigalow across from her with a commiserating smile.
Behind her Major Houlihan walked up. Her demeanor was different. She seemed nervous, taking hesitant half steps forward and then back as if she was wrestling with whether she wanted to approach. After another minute she seemed to make up her mind and she stepped up to them. Bigalow looked over her shoulder and smiled.
"Morning Major," she said in her friendly tone, "care to join us?"
"I was actually hoping to have a moment with Captain Lennox, if you don't mind Lieutenant." The Major said, still sounding nervous.
"Not at all." Bigalow replied, grabbing her bowl and standing, "I'm due in post op anyway." She turned and walked to dispose of her dishes before exiting the tent.
Margaret took the seat across from Ellie Marie and sat with her hands folded in front of her, not meeting her eye. After another tense moment she spoke.
"I wanted to tell you that you did an excellent job assisting Major Winchester yesterday." She said quietly.
"Thank you Major." She responded, unsure of what else to say. The Major shook her head and finally looked up.
"Alright look, I know I haven't been all that nice to you since we found out you were coming here. Or I guess horrible would be a better description."
"You haven't been horrible." Ellie Marie countered quickly, but Margaret shot her a look and she smirked slightly.
"Okay." you may have been a touch horrible." She ceded.
"I want to apologize for that." Margaret said, "I had no right to be mad at you. You were just doing as you were ordered, and if I'm being honest the majority of my anger wasn't even about you, you were just an easy deflection."
"Major," Ellie Marie said, sensing an opportunity to explain herself, "I need you to understand that I would never want to step on your toes or usurp your authority in any way. You have so much experience and knowledge. I can't wait to learn from you. My only goal in being here is to learn how to be a better nurse, and give everything I can towards helping to make the 4077th an even better place for the wounded to come to."
"I know." Said Margaret, "and I truly am grateful to have you." She reached her hand across the table. "Fresh start?"
"Fresh start." Ellie Marie agreed, shaking it.
That night she found herself in the tiny Officer's Club, barely bigger than her tent and made entirely out of corrugated metal. She was sitting at a makeshift table made out of an old jeep tire and a barrel. Hawkeye was on his third drink already.
"Oh stop moping." B.J. said to him, "Winchester may be staying, but we're free of Frank Burns! That's cause to celebrate."
"I refuse to celebrate trading in Adolf Hitler for Mao Zedong!" Hawkeye declared loudly, looking into his empty cup.
"And you were worried he'd be over dramatic about it." She murmured to B.J., he chuckled appreciatively.
"I have a right to be dramatic!" Hawkeye proclaimed loudly, "I had a chance to finally be free of unbearable tent mates! And the Army in its infinite wisdom traded the Presbyterian Putz for the Narcissistic Ninny!! I demand justice!"
"Alright, give me your glass. I'd better get us another round. Before you start proselytizing." She said as she grabbed both their cups.
She made her way through the small crowd to the wooden bar where Klinger was cleaning glasses in a sequin covered red evening gown.
"Bar wench! Three more whisky sodas!" She called.
"Come right up!" He replied with a wink.
"That's quite the dress." She teased, as he mixed the drinks, "and a daring amount of cleavage if you ask me."
"You know how men are." He said, "the more skin you show the better the tips." He sat the drinks in front of her.
"He still being a gloomy Gus?" he asked, nodding towards Hawkeye.
"Oh yes.I have a feeling he's going to milk this one for all it's worth." She replied, as she stuck a dollar in the tip bowl, and put another in the front of his dress.
"There ya go doll face, buy yourself something nice." She teased.
When she returned to the table she found Margaret had taken her seat, so she took the one next to B.J.
"Would you like me to get you something Major?" She asked, setting down the drinks.
"No that's fine. And please when we're here you can call me Margaret."
"Alright then, Margaret." She said hesitantly. It felt strange.
"We were just discussing your work in the O.R." Hawkeye said, "it was some of the best nursing I've seen in awhile."
"Agreed." Said Margaret, "I have to admit if General Bickford had given me my choice of candidates for Assistant Head Nurse, I don't think I could've picked anyone better."
"Assistant Head Nurse?" Said Hawkeye leaning forward on his hands, "don't tell me we now have not one but two hens ruling this roost?" Ellie Marie shot Margaret a look, and she smiled.
"That's right." Said Margaret, "so you'd better watch yourself Captain."