Chapter 13
Uijeongbu Korea; December 18th, 1951
"Ok you have to stop." Ellie Marie said, scooting onto the bench across from Hawkeye in the mess tent. He looked up at her and then down at the spoonful of cornflakes he had halfway to his mouth.
"Stop what?" He said in confusion.
"Stop acting the way you're acting whenever Max and I are together." She said, lowering her voice to almost a whisper, "Everytime we're within five feet of each other you start gawking like we're Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman, and we're about to confess our undying love and fall into each other's arms!"
"We'll get on with it and I'll stop gawking," He retorted, taking his bite of cereal.
"Hawk! It has been 10 days. I know that probably seems like a lifetime to you as far as romantic relationships are concerned, but normal people take a little longer than 10 days to get over a 16 year relationship."
"But you are waiting for him to get over it…." Hawkeye said with a teasing grin.
"I don't know what I'm doing," She said, "I'm not even thinking about it like that right now. All my attention is focused on trying to help my best friend get through the worst thing that has ever happened to him. That's it."
"Besides." She added, "What makes you think he's just going to automatically want to be with me when he's feeling better? He's never shown an ounce of romantic interest in me. You know Humphrey and Ingrid didn't actually end up together at the end of the movie if you recall." Hawkeye shook his head and smiled.
"You know you're beautiful when you're willfully ignorant." He teased.
"Uuuggghhh…." Charles sank down next to her with a groan, and B.J. took the seat next to Hawkeye.
"I see you're just as chipper as you were all night." Hawkeye commented towards Charles, who simply moaned again and dropped his face into his arms.
"Our dear Major has got himself a textbook sinus infection." B.J. explained to her.
"And he kept us up all night with his stunning rendition of mad cow disease in spring." Hawkeye added.
"I'm so sorry that my abject agony has inconvenienced you Pierce…." Charles said, shooting him a glare before returning his head to the table.
"I'm sorry Charles. Sinuses infections are lousy." Ellie Marie said, putting a hand on his back, "you want me to get you something to eat? Or some coffee?'
"No…" He murmured, "wouldn't be able to taste it if you did."
"Hey, don't baby him! He's a big enough baby already." Hawkeye complained.
"I'm a nurse." She pointed out, "taking care of sick people is kind of in the job description."
"Morning troops." The Colonel said, sitting down on her free right side. "Got some news for you."
"Colonel, whatever it is, can you please say it quietly….." Charles groaned.
"What's up with him?"
"Sinus infection." B.J. answered.
"Oh, well that's too bad, because this little piece of news is of particular significance to you Winchester. There's been a big shake up at I-Corps. General Imbrie has replaced General Hammond and Imbrie wants a powwow with all major officers in his command this afternoon."
"Colonel…." Charles said, looking up dully, "What makes you think I could find this of the remotest possible interest?"
"Because Señor Hoity-toity." The Colonel responded, "One hour from now Major Houlihan and I will be on our way to Seoul, and you will be interim commander of this post. Congratulations."
"Charles in command?" B.J. said.
"That's like giving Captain Bly his own fleet." Hawkeye added.
"Colonel I'm touched you thought of me. But it's out of the question." Charles said.
"It wasn't an offer, it was an order." The Colonel said flatly.
"And under ordinary circumstances I would be happy to comply!" Charles said, "but my sinuses are clogged and they're ready to burst. Here! Feel that!"
He grabbed the Colonel's hand and attempted to press it to his face but the Colonel jerked it back quickly.
"Major! We don't know each other that well!" He said, and then sighed, "All right Winchester, you're off the hook. Pierce, you're temporary C.O."
"I'm what??" said Hawkeye in alarm.
"There goes the war…." B.J. muttered into his coffee mug, and Ellie Marie shot him a smirk.
"Oh no….no you don't. I'm unfit for command!" Hawkeye protested.
"Oh yeah?" said Colonel Potter, "What have you got? A cold? A hangnail? Warts?"
"And scurvy!" Hawkeye added irritability.
"You're still it," said the Colonel.
"What about B.J.?" Hawkeye said pointing at him, "Or Ellie for that matter! They're both Captains too!"
"I don't want it." said B.J.
"Me either." Ellie Marie agreed.
"That's good enough for me." said the Colonel.
Hawkeye threw his hands in the air in frustration and rolled his eyes.
"Look Pierce, you're the chief surgeon, you've got seniority." the Colonel said.
"Yeah but I'm a coward! My insignia is a cringing chicken. I don't know how to give orders!"
"That's ok. No one around here knows how to take them." The Colonel replied, "don't worry about it. Radar knows the routine, and Ellie can handle the nurses."
"How long will you be gone?" Hawkeye asked.
"No clue. I've seen these things take a few hours or a few days."
"Terrific." Hawkeye grumbled.
"Just be in my office by 0900 hours commander." the Colonel said, and he got up to leave.
"So what's your first act of command, your highness?" B.J. quppied.
"To draw and quarter all three of you lazy finks for sticking me with it!" He snapped back, glaring around the table.
"At this point Pierce…" Charles said, "I would welcome the relief."
"Yeah alright fine. Go to Post Op for some meds Chuckles, that's an order." He said.
About 10 minutes later Ellie Marie was walking across the compound towards the waiting jeep with Margaret.
"Now I've got the duty roster set for the next two days, but if we're any longer than that you'll have to make it yourself." Margaret said.
"Yes Major."
"Make sure you don't put Bigalow on a back to back in lab and Post Op she doesn't do well on lack of sleep."
"I know Major."
"Oh and the shipment of morphine comes in on Thursday, they won't hand it over without the head nurse and the C.O.s signatures, so if we're not back, Pierce will have to be there with you to sign for it, and we need to order blankets we're running low again."
"Major…." Ellie Marie said, "Take a breath. I've got things under control. I was trained by the best, remember?" Margaret smiled at that.
"You just focus on the fact that you're one of only three head nurses invited to this shindig, and the only one not a Colonel. I smell a promotion on the wind."
"Well let's not get ahead of ourselves…." Margaret said, but she couldn't hide the smile creeping onto her face.
"You're going to do amazing Major, and I'll hold down the fort here while you do." Ellie Marie said, and Margaret gave her arm an appreciative squeeze before hopping into the jeep next to the Colonel.
"Try not to let Pierce burn the camp down while we're gone!" The Colonel called.
"I'll do my best sir!" She said, and waved as they drove off.
She turned to walk up the hill just in time to see Klinger coming out of the main building looking dejected.
"Hawkeye told you he didn't have the power as interim commander to sign your Section 8?" She surmised.
"Didn't even let me finish my pitch. I had three really good bribes lined up!"
"I coulda told you that was gonna happen." She said, reaching down and giving his hand two quick squeezes. He responded with two quick squeezes of his own.
It was their newly enacted way of communicating. It had become obvious quite quickly that she couldn't keep asking him how he was doing every time she saw him, so they'd developed this quick and efficient way of checking in. Two squeezes, you good? Two squeezes back, I'm good. Three squeezes, not so much. She patted his back as she continued toward the building.
"Hey, are we still on for later?" She asked, turning back to him as she walked, "I got a bottle of sake and Chapter 16 of Little Women waiting for you."
"Yeah…..but I'm getting worried. Beth seems like she's getting sicker and if something happens to her, and you don't warn me I'm gonna be mad!"
"I can't spoil it for you!" She said laughing.
"Yeah…yeah…" He said, "I'll see you later."
She continued up to the main office, and walked in just as Radar came storming out of the Colonel's office.
"Boy, that guy! I tell you what." He huffed angrily.
"Going that well huh?" She asked.
"He won't do anything!" He said, "He won't even sign the duty roster! I swear, I know he's a Captain and I'm a Corporal, but if he doesn't get his act together I might just punch him in the nose!"
"You got a step stool out there so you can reach?" Hawkeye called from behind the door.
"Ooooooo I tell you what…" Radar bristled. Ellie Marie put a hand on his arm.
"Easy slugger." She said, "give me the roster. I'll handle it."
She walked into the office to find Hawkeye sitting in his bathrobe with his feet up on Colonel Potter's desk attempting to balance a ball point pen on one finger. She slapped the roster down in front of him.
"Sign it." She said.
"I've already been through this with Radar, he can just sign everything I need to sign and I'll sign something saying I approve his signature. It's all very straightforward."
"Hawkeye it may have escaped your notice, but not only are you interim commander but with Margaret gone I'm acting Head Nurse, and unlike you I actually care about doing a good job, and showing Margaret I'm up to the task. I can't do that without a little buy in from you! So here's how this is going to go. I'll work with Radar and take care of as much of the day to day minutiae of keeping this place moving as I can, but if there's a task that absolutely has to have the ok of the C.O. you'll help us out by doing the bare minimum of slapping your John Hancock on a few forms. Got it?" She shoved his feet off the desk, making him sit up.
"I don't think I've ever been more attracted to you." He said.
"HAWk—"
"I got it! I got it!" He said quickly, "but just for clarification. If I choose to disobey orders do I get a spanking?" She shoved the roster towards him.
"Sign it." She repeated, "I'll be in Post Op."
She walked back into the outer office, and shot a look at Radar.
"He gives you any more trouble you come find me ok?"
"You got it!" He replied.
"Ah Ellie….." Charles called from a bed at the end of the row when she walked into Post Op, "I'm out of water."
"So get up and get yourself some more." She said, "it's your sinuses that are out of commission not your legs." He groaned and rolled over.
She walked the short way down the ward to where B.J. was standing next to a patient checking his chart.
"Your bunk mates are angling for a knuckle sandwich each today." She said., "between Major Whiny Pants and our fearless leader Captain I Won't Lift a Finger, I feel like I'm trying to paddle up stream without any oars."
"Shoulda taken the job yourself if you didn't want the headache." B.J. said.
"Alright then Captain….I didn't see you jumping up to volunteer either."
"Yeah but I live with the headaches, taking command wouldn't have spared me." He said sitting down next to the patient,
"Alright let's see here…..Webster. Oh right, loved your book. Especially the chase scene where L was following K." Private Webster chuckled.
"You're doing just fine." B.J. assured him, "so fine in fact that you won't need this drain anymore."
"You're gonna take it out here? Now?" The boy said, looking scared.
"And it won't hurt a bit." B.J. said.
"Oh gosh Doc….could you at least give me something?"
"Too late, It's already done." B.J. said, setting the drain tube next to the bed.
"Really?" Webster said in surprise.
"Really really. Now I just have to take out a couple stitches."
"Oh, no….."
"It's alright soldier." B.J. Said with a smile, "Just go ahead and get lost in Nurse Lennox's pretty blue eyes and it'll be over before you know it."
Webster looked up at Ellie Marie and gave her a shy smile that she returned.
"You're doing great." She encouraged.
"Klinger! More water!" Charles demanded, as Klinger walked through the outer doors.
"I'm a little busy, Major." He said, walking past him towards Ellie Marie .
"Now! You insubordinate riff!" Charles snapped.
"Riff?" Klinger said, turning back to him, "With all due respect sir. May a pregnant camel give birth on your bunk."
"Levantine thug…." Charlie muttered.
"Take it easy Webster, I'll be finished in a second." said B.J. as the private flinched and pulled away.
"Will someone please bring me some water!" Charles whined.
"Klinger, get that wheelchair and roll him out of here." Hawkeye said as he walked through the door.
"Your command is my wish Oh Temporary King of the Hill!" Klinger said, and he pushed the wheelchair down the row towards Charles.
"Pierce….you order me in, you order me out. Make up your mind, where do you want me?" Charles said.
"Black hole of Calcutta and step on it!" Hawkeye replied, as Klinger wheeled Charles out the door.
"Excuse me sir." Radar said, following after Hawkeye with a pile of papers, "you still haven't done your status reports. Every morning you gotta fill out your DD-5 A's."
"I DD do?"
"Unless you filled out your DD-5 A's from the day before."
"Radar just put all that garbage on my desk. I'll ignore it later."
"The pile on your desk is already almost as tall as me!"
"Well how bad can that be…."
"We had a deal Captain." Ellie Marie said, as she continued to help B.J.
"That was for signatures. You never said anything about paperwork." Hawkeye retorted.
"Uh…Hawkeye." Father Mulcahy had just walked in.
"Whoever said it was lonely at the top?" Hawkeye grumbled, turning to him.
"Alright Father, what's your problem?" He asked.
"Uh…well." The Father stuttered, "the fact of the matter is….you look busy."
"I am! What do you want?"
"I don't want to sound critical." The Father continues, "I mean, after all you are new to the job. Still, it is turning colder and we do need them, and now seems as good a time as any to—"
"Need what?" Hawkeye cut him off.
"Blankets! We're running low on blankets." Father Mulcahy clarified, "Everytime we send a boy to Seoul he goes with a blanket."
"Sure, they send the boys back, but never the blankets."
"Major Houlihan actually mentioned that to me before she left." Ellie Marie said, "She told me we needed to put in an order."
"That sounds like an everyday minutiae sort of thing." Hawkeye said.
"Actually it's a, your signature on the requisition form, kind of thing." She replied.
"Of course it is," he muttered, "Alright Father I'll get right to it."
"Because the temperature is supposed to drop below freezing tonight." Father Mulcahy added.
"Okay! Okay!"
———-
"Don't let your husband want for anything. Thank God he is mending. Your sincere friend and servant, James Lawrence. The end." Ellie Marie read. She closed the book and rolled over onto her side to put it back on the shelf.
"I don't like it." Klinger said from his spot on the floor leaning against her bunk.
With the weather turning colder Klinger had taken to hanging out with her in the nurses tent when they both had free time. The other nurses didn't seem to mind for the most part. They'd all had a soft spot for Klinger for years, and had often seen him as sort of one of the girls, being that he let them borrow his clothes and jewelry whenever they wanted. Now she suspected they'd become even more protective of him given the events of the last few weeks. He was currently holding a skeen of yarn between his hands while Ginger, the only other person in the tent, wrapped it slowly into a ball.
"You don't like what?" Ellie Marie asked, crossing her arms behind her head and laying back down.
"All of them are doing their best to stay positive. But I just know something bad is gonna happen." He said, "and that letter Beth wrote? That girl is too sweet for the world, and I don't like where that's going at all. And don't get me started on that little punk Laurie."
"You really never read that book before Max?" Ginger asked.
"Nah.' He answered, "where would a kid who grew up in pool halls and corner stores nicking sweets, find time to read a book like that?"
"You pinched the penny sweets?" Ginger said with a laugh, "me too. Which one was your favorite?"
"Oh gotta be the root beer." Max said with a smile.
"I knew you had taste!" She teased.
Ellie Marie reached down and ruffled his hair. He looked back and gave her a tired smile as well. She'd been much less reserved with her physical affection for him in the past few weeks, not because she was trying to get anywhere with him, but because it became apparent to her very quickly after their ill gotten trip to Seoul and back that he needed it. A small squeeze of his arm, a pat on the back, or a simple ruffling of his hair seemed to help keep him grounded. Yet she wasn't naive enough to ignore the slippery slope she knew she was teetering on the edge of.
"What time is it?" He asked.
"About quarter to nine." Ellie Marie answered, "you don't go on duty for another hour."
Attention all personnel! Incoming wounded! Choppers and ambulances loaded!
"Sounds like we're all going on duty right now." said Ginger with a sigh, as they stood to head into the compound.
"Plasma stat!" Ellie Marie called a few minutes later, "Type and crossmatch for two units of whole blood!"
"How you doing?" She asked, as Hawkeye joined her to assess a casualty.
"Great…" He said, "you wouldn't happen to be carrying around an extra surgeon would you?"
"Sorry, I left mine in my other coat." She quipped back.
"Charles come on move it will ya?" Hawkeye snapped.
"Pierce please…..I'm going through hell." Charles moaned.
"Well go through it a little faster." Hawkeye said, "Radar what about those blankets"
"I mailed in the requisitions. They'll probably be here tomorrow."
"Tomorrow? What's wrong with today?"
"These things take time Captain."
"Tell that to these guys who are out here freezing."
"I feel bad about it too sir."
"Hawk go easy on him." Ellie Marie said, "He's on your side. And while we're on the topic, ease up on Charles too. I know he's a royal pain in the rear."
"He's the crowned monarch pain in the rear." Hawkeye corrected.
"Be that as it may, he's miserable, and in a considerable amount of pain I imagine, and he's doing his best."
"Yeah I know…" Hawkeye muttered.
———-
"Clamp." Charles groaned, stifling a sneeze. Ellie Marie handed him one,
"Hankey." B.J. said from the table next to theirs.
"Hunnicutt I have met a lot of people in my life…. You are not one of them." Charles retorted before sneezing again.
"Bless you anyway, creep." B.J. said.
"I believe the expression is God bless you, creep." Father Mulcahy interjected.
"Can we keep it down in here please?" Hawkeye snapped.
"Ugh….how can I be expected to drain these miserable sinuses if they keep sending me more wounded?" Charles complained.
"I wouldn't take it Charles. Send them back." said B.J.
"Why doesn't somebody tie off his tongue?" Charles spat.
"Why doesn't somebody stand on yours!"
"Oh dry up both of you!" Ellie Marie said.
"Believe me I would love to!" Charles countered.
"Will you all shut up!" Hawkeye said.
"Ah, another country heard from." quipped B.J.
"Can we be serious? I mean it, I want it quiet in here." Hawkeye demanded.
"Alright, knock off the loud bleeding everyone."
"Come on Hunnicutt. I got enough to worry about with a room full of wounded and a camp full of headaches."
"Not to mention a couple CCs of self pity."
"At least I'm trying. Meanwhile you stay in the back seat where you belong."
A murmur of surprise and shock went around the O.R. at his words.
"Well I guess I've been told…." said B.J., "shutting up now Oh fearless leader."
————
"Got any fours? Ellie Marie asked, from her place sitting cross legged on Radar's desk.
"You asked me about fours two turns ago!" Radar snapped.
"Hey!" said Klinger, reaching over and flicking his ear, "just because you're frustrated with Captain Pierce doesn't mean you take it out on her!"
"Max…it's fine." She said.
"No, he's right." Radar agreed, "it's not your fault. Go fish."
"I know it's frustrating kid, but you'll get through it." Klinger said, "to tell you the truth I think you've gotten a little spoiled lately with how regimented Colonel Potter is. Remember how things were with Colonel Blake?…. Fours G. Cough em' up." He said to Ellie Marie with a wink.
"That is so cheap…." She grumbled, pulling two fours from her hand and giving them to him.
"That's the game darlin'" He shot back.
"Yeah, but with Colonel Blake it was different." Radar said, "he might have been scatterbrained, and a little less willing to lay down the law but I never seen a kinder more hard working man in my life. He woulda broken his back for any one of the people he was commanding and all of the wounded too! He made sure to learn every single soldiers name that came through here. Did you know that? He was an amazing C.O."
"I miss him too kid…." Klinger said gently, "he really was one of a kind. Always complimented me on my outfits, and noticed when I put in the extra effort."
"Yeah he was great…." Radar said.
"I wish I could have met him." Ellie Marie said.
"You would have loved him G." Klinger said, "Hey Radar, remember the time that Hawkeye and Trapper traded Colonel Blake's mahogany desk for penicillin on the black market?" Radar started to laugh and Klinger joined him.
"And he didn't even know what was going on until they had it rigged to a chopper flying out of camp?" Radar laughed. "And Hawkeye asked, "Hey Henry is that your desk?"
"Yup…….that's my desk…." Klinger said, obviously impersonating the late Colonel while they both laughed. Suddenly the phone rang.
"4077th M*A*S*H." Radar said chuckling, "No, Colonel Potter's not—-Colonel is that you? What are you doing up so late sir? Is it an officer's conference? Uh huh. Oh fine. Mom's gonna enter her cucumbers in the county fair, and Uncle Ed's a judge so she might win…..Oh you meant how are things here. Uh great. Fine. Pretty good. When are you coming back sir? Hawkeye? He's uh….he's trying real hard. When did you say you'll be back? Uh huh…well hurry. Everybody misses you here. Uh huh. Ok. Goodnight sir."
"So what's the poop?" Klinger said when Radar hung up the phone.
"Doesn't sound like they are anywhere near being done." Radar said glumly.
"You know you weren't lying about Hawkeye." Ellie Marie pointed out, "I know he was goofing off in the beginning but ever since the casualties showed up he's really trying his best."
"Yeah I know he is." Radar agreed.
—--
"Radar sure was fond of Colonel Blake wasn't he?" Ellie Marie asked as Klinger walked her back to her tent a little while later.
"We all were." He said, "Henry was the kind of guy it was hard not to be fond of."
"How'd he die?" Ellie Marie asked, "I've never asked you."
"His plane got shot down over the Sea of Japan when he was on his way home." Klinger said, "had a wife and three kids waiting for him to land, including a baby he never even met."
"God that's horrible…." She said.
"Yeah it was…." He agreed, "You know I guess we should probably count ourselves lucky. Out of all the people who've come and gone here, Henry's the only one we've ever lost. But for it to have been him, and to lose him like that….it's was more than enough for a lifetime."
"I'm sure it was." Ellie Marie said, they'd reached her tent.
"You got KP in the morning right?" She asked.
"Yep. Bright and early."
"Save me some fresh pancakes would ya?"
"You got it G."
Two squeezes. Two squeezes back.
Attention! Jeep with single patient wants to meet single doctor on the double!
Ellie Marie looked up to where the jeep had just rolled into the compound and ran over to it, getting there at the same time as B.J.
"Is it bad?" The soldier asked anxiously.
"Easy pal. It's not too bad." B.J. said. "I can get those shell fragments out with eyebrow tweezers."
"I'll take it sir."
"How'd it happen?" Ellie Marie asked.
"Mortar. I was helping my buddy at the battalion aid station. Direct hit. Got us both, and killed the aid surgeon."
"Geez, what about your buddy?"
"I think he's hurt worse than I am, but I was the one bleeding so they shipped me."
"Why do you think he's hurt bad?" B.J. asked.
"Well he's not cut or nothin', but he looks gray ya know?"
"His stomach hurt?"
"Yeah! I touched it and he screamed, but they thought he was fakin'"
B.J. and Ellie Marie exchanged a dark look.
"Ok Ellie, get him inside. I'm going back up there."
"Beej, you gotta tell Hawkeye."
"You tell him, I can't get an appointment."
"This isn't a good idea Captain…" Klinger said, helping the man out of the truck and stabilizing his leg.
"Well….I've had worse." B.J. said, "it's not like he can demote me." He hopped into the jeep and the driver turned around and headed back down the road.
"This isn't gonna be good." Klinger said to her, as they helped the man up the hill to pre op and got him on a cot.
"Is this the man who just came in?" Hawkeye said, when he walked in a minute later.
"Yes sir, this is Corporal Hough." said Klinger.
"Hi Doc."
"Hi." said Hawkeye, "Alright get B.J. on him right away and tell him to hurry. I just got a call. There's a lot more casualties coming in. We're gonna be very busy very soon."
"Um…Hawk. About B.J…." Ellie Marie said.
"What about him?"
"Don't yell at her sir, it's not her fault!" Klinger interjected.
"You know that jeep that just came in?" She said, "It just went out again with B.J. on it."
"What? Why?"
"He went after this guy's buddy. He's hurt badly and they left him at the aid station, so he went to get him."
"Well what does he think we're gonna get here? Shaving nicks?"
"He didn't know we had more wounded on the way."
"He would have if he checked in with me first!" Hawkeye snapped and he began pacing, "Fantastic. Potter's not here, B.J.s not here, Charles has never been here and I'm left holding the bag!"
"If you can spare me as a nurse I can take the most straightforward stuff." Ellie Marie offered, "lacerations, broken bones, surface level shrapnel."
"Yeah we just might have to." Hawkeye said.
Attention all personnel! Choppers incoming!
"This one's superficial. Ellie, he's yours as soon as you're done out here!" Hawkeye called a few minutes later.
"This one has a bad chest wound. He's shocky. He better go in now." She said.
"He can't. I've got two that are worse off and Charles is already working."
"Alright. I'll start him on whole blood and try to get him stabilized before I scrub in. The girls will manage until you're ready."
"You're the most stunning surgeon in this camp Captain Lennox." Hawkeye said.
"Hawkeye Colonel Potter's on the phone for you!" Radar shouted.
"Tell him I'm busy!" Hawkeye shouted back.
"I brought him all the way out here for you." Radar said, carrying the phone through the compound and holding it up to Hawkeye's ear.
"Oh hello Colonel Potter! It's been so long I didn't recognize your voice!….There's a litter over there, get him into pre-op…..How's everything in Seoul? Having fun?"
"Captain Pierce!"
"Yeah I'll be right there….Gotta run Colonel, but I just wanted to say I'm thrilled with the hustle and bustle of command, the thousand details that clog my day and waste my nights, and time permitting, I even tend to a patient or two!"
"Captain Pierce!"
"Gotta run Colonel. Been nice chatting with you. Why don't you drop in if you're in the neighborhood?"
————-
"How many more we got out there Klinger?" Hawkeye asked a few hours later.
"Just two sir. Broken leg and a head laceration. Superficial."
"Good good… and how are you doing down there doctor Lennox?"
"I'm alright." Ellie Marie said, "I'm fairly confident I got all the shrapnel out of this calf muscle but I'd feel a whole lot better if one of you two looked it over before I dressed it."
"I'm sure it's fine." Hawkeye said, "Your work has been exemplary Captain Lennox, we trust you."
"If you say so." She said, taking a deep breath.
"You're doing amazing G." Klinger said quietly, giving her side a quick squeeze as he passed.
"I second that." Charles said from the next table, "Harvard Medical would be proud."
"Thanks guys." She said quietly, as she put a bandage over the wound.
"Well Dr, as much as I hate to admit it, you ran that siege pretty well." Winchester said, about a half hour later as they all headed into the scrub room to change out of their gowns.
"We were great for half a staff." Hawkeye said tiredly, rubbing his face with his hands.
"Damn that Hunnicutt, where is he?" He sighed, "You know technically he's AWOL. I could throw the book at him."
"Easy there regular army." Ellie Marie said. "Five days ago that would have been you on that jeep and you know it."
"Yeah well it seems I've gotten a hefty dose of my own medicine, and it's a bitter pill." Hawkeye said. A jeep horn sounded in the compound, and they all ran.
"Easy with him. If the ride didn't kill him he's still got a chance." B.J. said.
"How is he?" Hawkeye asked.
"Severe internal bleeding."
"Are you ok?"
"Yeah I'm fine."
"Good. Now what the hell do you think you were doing? You think you can just waltz out of here anytime you want?"
"Not now Hawk."
"Don't you 'not now' me. While you were driving around playing hero we were trying to patch together a whole platoon with only two doctors! Well two and a half, Ellie Marie stepped up and thank God she did!"
"Hey I wasn't out joy riding pal. When I go up to an aid station it's because I'm needed!"
"You were needed here you jackass!" Hawkeye yelled, "which you would have known if you'd check with me first!"
"I did exactly what Captain Pierce would have done!" B.J. shouted back, "I don't know what Commander Pierce would have done. I don't even know Commander Pierce, and I'm not sure I want to."
He pushed past Hawkeye hard, and walked into the scrub room without looking back.
———
"So you think Ethel and Lucy are gonna make up anytime soon?" Ellie Marie asked.
She was perched on the counter next to the sink in the kitchen trying her best to ignore the way Klinger had his sleeves rolled up to the elbows exposing his forearms while he washed that evening's dishes.
"You know if Cook catches you in here you might end up the surprise in tomorrow's Breakfast Surprise." He pointed out.
"Eh….let him try," She said with a shrug, "I outrank him."
"Not in his kitchen you don't" Klinger said.
Ellie Marie sighed and hopped off the counter. She grabbed a dish towel and went to stand beside him, taking the plate from his hands and drying it, before setting it back on the rack.
"There." She said, "now he's getting free labor and a job done twice as fast, so he can't complain." He smirked at her and shook his head.
"So do you?" She asked again, "think they'll make up?"
"Yeah….once the Colonel gets back and Pierce can go back to being his sarcastic nonchalant self, they'll be fine." Klinger said.
"Crazy though isn't it? I never thought I'd see the day when those two wouldn't be speaking."
"It happens even to the best of friends sometimes, unfortunately."
"But not us right?" Ellie Marie said, shooting him a sly smile.
"Hell no." He said nudging her shoulder with his.
They kept washing and drying but she noticed he was stealing glances at her every few seconds.
"What?" She said finally, feeling slightly self conscious.
"Nothin'." He said, "It's just, I kinda can't get over watching you in the O.R. yesterday. I know you were scared but you were so strong and capable. I always knew you were planning on becoming a surgeon but to get to watch you actually doing it? You're kinda incredible G."
"I don't know about that…." She muttered.
"I do." He said.
"HEY!" Came an angry voice from the doorway, "What're you doing back here!" Cook glared at her.
"I'm drying dishes." She said calmly, holding up the dish rag and plate.
"Why…" Cook said, eyeing her as if he were trying to figure out how she was tricking him.
"Because I want to?" She answered.
He looked at her hard for another moment, but then seemed to decide that he couldn't find anything inherently wrong.
"Just make sure you stack them right." He grunted. She gave him a small salute and he turned and walked out the door.
"Geez Louise I thought he was gonna eat you!" Klinger said, laughing.
"You and me both!" She agreed.
"Hey Klinger!…..and Ellie I guess." Radar said, running into the doorway and seeing them giggling together over the wash basin, "the Colonel's back!"
They followed him out from behind the mess tent and up the hill to the main office. When they got to Colonel Potter's office Margaret and Hawkeye were both already there.
"Colonel! Major! Good to have you back!" She said happily.
"Good to be back!" said Colonel Potter, "Captain Pierce here was just telling us how you came in in the clutch in a big way when the push was on. Mighty proud of you Captain. That's being a team player."
"Yes, I've talked with the other nurses and it seems you've done an exceptional job Ellie, above and beyond truly." Margaret agreed.
"See….told you superstar." Klinger leaned over and murmured in her ear, she gave him a light elbow to the ribs.
"Thank you Colonel, and Major." She said, "but truly we wouldn't have gotten through it without Hawkeye. He's the one who stepped up."
"Agreed." The Colonel said turning to Hawkeye, "Fine job son. I'm glad to know if I'm ever out of commission, there are capable hands I can depend on."
"Oh no Colonel." Hawkeye said, "I'm telling you right now. If you ever try and leave me in charge again, I'll walk my capable hands right into the minefield."