Hey everyone!

Second updates of the month are here and I'm writing again and geting chapter written up so I'm really happy about that. I'm hoping that the double updates will be here to stay.

Lots of love,

LSH xx

A Wild Heart – Part 19:

Éomer barely had time to react before he felt his sleeve getting wet. He looked down and could see his sister silently crying. He sent Gléoda back to Edoras to get Éowyn as he felt that she should be with them as well. There were clearly things that had been pushed into the background during the War of the Ring but were now starting to come to the front again. He could feel that there was pressure on his sister's shoulders from Gondor and he'd always tried to protect her. Éowara had always been the more sensitive of the three. He was the firstborn and his father's heir, later Théoden's heir, Éowyn had been the White Lady and Shield-maiden and Éowara had just always followed Éowyn's lead. If anyone hadn't known that the two weren't twins they'd think they were.

Éowara didn't even look up as she heard horses galloping nearer and eventually stopping near them. She soon felt someone sitting beside her.

"What happened?" Éowyn asked as she looked up at her brother and then down at Éowara as she sighed.

"I think there are things that she doesn't want to confront or she is feeling the pressure of what she has to do," Éomer said, "I think I may also have been too hard on her and that is something that you warned me against. I didn't think I was being too hard on her but…"

"It is fine. She is coping with a lot right now and that is something we must cope with somehow," Éowyn spoke before wrapping an arm around her sister as well, "a lot was decided without her permission and she had a lot given to her and she has had to fight to be given the chance to prove herself and that she is able to do what she has been tasked to do."

"I have tried to tell her that she is loved and wanted by so many people," Éomer spoke, "but she seems overwhelmed by that as well."

"There is a lot of emotions running through her right now and she needs the time to decompress from everything that has happened. She has lost so much and from a younger age than we were," Éowyn said as she took Éowara from their brother, "she knows that deep down but she also does feel the weight of everything as well."

"I am here you know," Éowara spoke as she settled into Éowyn and looked up at her brother causing them both to jump slightly and look down at her.

"Éo…" Éomer sighed as he heard her speak finally, "you need to start being honest about how you are feeling because this does not help anyone," he said as he moved to wipe a tear away from his sister's face.

"I know I do but it's hard. You're the King of the Mark and Éowyn is married to Faramir and is going to be a healer now and I am just…"

"Lost and trying to find your place in this world?" Éomer asked and Éowara nodded.

"I know that my near future is planned put for me and I do want to help with the rebuilding of Annúminas and all the things in Gondor. I just feel… I just feel that I will never know love in the way that Éowyn does and you will have to brother. I have had no say in everything that has happened," Éowara spoke as she sat up more. "I had to fight in that Council Chamber far more than if I had been a man. Women are not supposed to be doing what I am charged with. How can I be a leader when I do not know where to begin?" she asked, "where do I begin with the rebuilding? I have been there and seen Annúminas myself but it is different when I have to rebuild and restore the seat of the Northern Kingdom and then everything in Gondor as well."

"Your future may have been mapped out for you for now but you can change that if you wish," Éomer spoke, "or you can use the position you have been thrown into to change the lives of others," he said, "Aragorn believes that, despite your rebellious nature, there is some good within you and you may not be able to see it yet but you are about to find your place in this world," he said and kissed his sister's head.

"How did you feel?" Éowara asked.

"How did I feel when?" Éomer asked as he looked at Éowara and wondered what she was on about.

"When you thought Éowyn and I dead at Pelennor," Éowara asked. The older two looked at each other wondering if this was some sort of distraction technique from their youngest sister. Éowyn looked at Éomer and nodded. There was something in the way Éowara had spoken that made her think her sister needed to hear the answer.

"I thought my world had ended there and then. Théodred had already perished and I saw our uncle laid there dead," Éomer said, his turn now to stare across the lake, "then I caught sight of you two together and it felt like my world had ended there and then. I went into temporary madness and went into battle without any care to my life anymore as I thought my sisters to have fallen as well," he said as he turned to look at Éowara. He'd had this discussion with Éowyn but they'd chosen to keep it a secret from Éowara.

"But you only ever seemed to care about Éowyn and was always hard on her… especially when they concerned me…" Éowara said as she looked at her brother, "it felt that you left Éowyn to cope with me."

"That is true to an extent," Éomer said as he watched his sister, "but a lot of the time I knew what you were up to. I wasn't as hard on you but once you started learning sword fighting I was even harder on Éowyn. I didn't think it was something that you should have been learning but it was needed from you as well. I always knew what you were doing, what lessons you were taking, how well you were doing," he said as he looked at her.

"I thought you didn't care about me or really love me because you never appeared to be interested in me…" Éowara spoke and Éomer shook his head.

"In some ways I love you than Éowyn and she knows that. She's known it for years Éowara. She was the planned sister and you were the bonus that nobody had expected to come along and your activities have always reached me. I may have seemed like I didn't care about you but that is far from how I truly felt about you," he said and moved to wrap an arm around his youngest sister.

Éowara looked up at her brother and bit her lip as she looked at him. She'd gone her whole life thinking Éowyn and their Uncle and cousin were the only ones who loved her. Whereas Éowyn had been loved by all and it was obvious, Éowara had always felt in her siblings' shadow and, even when they'd defeated the Witch-king together, Éowara had been the second.

She wasn't jealous of Éowyn but she'd wanted to make a name for herself and step out from the shadows and, now she had that chance, she was terrified of not being able to live up to what people expected of her. She'd only ever wanted to know that her brother loved her as she'd thought that he didn't before she wrapped her arms around him.

"Éowara. I have always loved you and that is something that I should have told you clearly," Éomer spoke as he kept his arm around his sister, "we have had our moments… whether as a family or you and Éowyn… but now this is your time to have your moment. This is your time," he said, "and if you need any of us when you are alone in Evendim and we shall come to you," Éomer said as he looked at Éowyn, who nodded in agreement.

"I love you Éomer," Éowara said as she looked up at him and, in that moment, Éomer saw the falling aways of one of his sister's biggest questions.