Chapter 1: Trial
"And that's the game, folks - the Hazeltuck Lions bring home the championship with a score of 3-0! Better luck next time, Squirrels!"
As the Lions started to celebrate with their newly obtained championship trophy, Lynn continued to seethe in anger following the end of the game, her knuckles gradually turning white from how tightly she was gripping her bat, desiring to use it on the blue-clad team as they continued to enjoy their victory.
The entire game had gone horribly for her team ever since it started - Margo accidentally flinging herself into the umpire after missing the ball, her teammates constantly colliding with each other while out on the field and even having her clothing literally knocked off of her by the ball when it hit her.
Even doing her usual good luck rituals didn't work, leading to her striking out during the bottom of the ninth inning and costing her team the game.
"Hey, chin up Junior, you'll get them next time," her father Lynn Sr. said, trying to comfort his athletic daughter.
"That's not going to help Dad. I'm Lynn Loud Jr! I'm supposed to win!" Lynn argued, stomping her feet angrily.
"Now Lynn, no one likes a bad sport," Luna said.
"Who cares about good and bad sports!? All that matters is winning!" Lynn snapped.
"That's enough Junior," Rita scolded. Lynn just huffed, as they entered the parking lot. And, much to their horror, they saw the family station wagon, Van-zilla, as they called it, being towed away.
"Hey wait! That's my car you're towing!" Lynn Sr. said, running towards the tow truck.
"Sorry sir, but this van is parked illegally," the truck driver said, showing them a sign that said "No Parking Anytime."
"That wasn't there before!" Lynn Sr. exclaimed.
"That was then, this is now. Of course, if you want to show me the paperwork, I can let you folks off with a warning," the truck driver said.
"Of course, let me just..." Lynn Sr. said, trying to find his keys, but came up empty handed, "Uh, honey, do you have the keys?" Lynn Sr. asked.
"I thought you had them," Rita stated.
Lynn Sr. walked over to the window to see the keys were still in the ignition. "Dang it! I left the keys in the ignition!" Lynn Sr. exclaimed.
"Uh huh, sure you did," The Tow Truck Driver said, not convinced, as he got in his truck, and drove away, with the van, much to the family's dismay.
"Man, this stinks," Lana grumbled.
"Well, walking is still good for us, and we do a lot less damage to the air, right?" Leni asked. The others wished they could feel uplifted by the ditzy blonde's optimism, as they trudged through the streets, back to their house.
Lincoln Loud was sadly sitting on the sidewalk. His family had just banished him from his home, on account of their belief in him being "Bad Luck". Man, did Lincoln now hate that stupid phrase. Almost as much as he hated his stupid sister Lynn for giving him the stupid idea of spreading a lie about bad luck. Lincoln couldn't believe his family. Sure he may have lied to them, but was that still an excuse for kicking him to the curb? Lincoln was still in his PJ's, as he was still sitting. Unbeknownst to him, his luck was about to change for the better. A cop car was driving around. A cop and a detective were making their rounds, when they saw and immediately recognized the boy.
"Hey, isn't that Lincoln?" the detective asked, seeing the boy.
"I think you're right, Ross. But why's he out on his own? And in his Pjs no less?" the cop asked.
"I don't know Randy, but something tells me I won't like it. Let's see what's up," Ross suggested. Randy took his brother's advice, and drove on up to the sulking boy. Randy then honked the horn, catching the young boy's attention, "Hey Links!"
"Oh, hey Uncle Ross, Uncle Randy," Lincoln said, lacking any enthusiasm. Both cops could tell by their nephew's tone that something was amiss.
"What're ya doin, wandering around in your PJ's like that?" Ross asked.
Lincoln clenched his fists and teeth in anger. "My 'family' is why," Lincoln replied bitterly, trying to remain respectful of his Uncles. They may be family, but they were also cops.
"C'mon, we'll take you down to the station, and you can fill us in on the details," Ross said, as they let Lincoln into their patrol car.
"Thank you both," Lincoln said.
"Don't worry about it," Randy replied, as they drove off. But all the while, the two uncles couldn't help but wonder why Lincoln wasn't with his family.
Later, at the Police Station…
"Alright Lincoln, now, can you tell us exactly what happened?" Randy asked, as he gave his nephew a doughnut.
"Well, it was like this," Lincoln said, as he began to explain his situation to his uncles.
The scene then relocated to the outside of the police station. "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?" The screams of both Ross and Randy were so loud, it caused birds to fly away, and some of the nearby passersby to flinch.
Inside the station, the other cops looked startled. Even the big boss was stunned.
"So, let's see if we got your story straight. Junior forced you to go to her softball game, then pinned her loss on you, which then gave you the idea to use her irrational superstitious behavior to get free time, which eventually led your family, your parents included, to bar you not only from your own room, but your house itself?!" Ross yelled in outrage.
Lincoln flinched, but remained composed. "Basically yeah. It was a really stupid move on my part, but come on!" Lincoln practically screamed, no longer able to control her anger, slamming his fist on the table, "I wish there was a law against that kind of action!"
"There is," Randy replied, which got Lincoln's attention, "You're a minor, Lincoln. That's someone under the age of 18. Locking out a minor is a serious offense, punishable by some serious jail time. And something as ludicrous as 'bad luck' is NOT an acceptable defense," he explained.
"Don't worry Lincoln, we're going to get you some serious justice for your family, and give Junior a serious dose of reality," Ross added.
"Only problem is, Royal Woods is a big place. Even with every patrol car on the streets, finding them will be like finding a needle in a haystack," Randy replied.
Then, Lincoln got an idea, one so brilliant, it couldn't possibly fail. "I think I have an idea on how we can get my family to come to us," Lincoln stated. His uncles gave him their attention.
"And what might that be?" Ross asked.
"You guys know how much my Dad absolutely HATES Duel Monsters, right?" Lincoln smirked, as he Uncles then smirked with him, getting the idea.
(Play Yu-Gi-Oh Zexal: Halfway to Forever)
The intro starts with Lincoln putting on activating his Duel Disk, before he runs towards the scene.
Still together as one;
Cuz divided we're none;
Ready to go, we feel the flow!
The scene changed to Lincoln drawing a card and summoning his Elemental HEROS behind him, as Winged Kuriboh was right next to him.
So don't stand in our way;
You know we ain't afraid;
This is our time, we're in control!
The scene then changed and showed Noah summoning his Sword and Mio with her Moonblades, with their Ouroboros forms appearing behind them.
If I trip up today;
You just wipe it away;
All of my fears are gone, erased!
The scene then changed and showed Eunie holding her Ether Rifle and aiming it while Taion summoned his Mondo while they surrounded him, with their Ouroboros forms appearing behind them.
Let us tear down the walls
'Til the final night falls
The bonds of our souls can't be replaced!
The scene then changed and showed Lanz piercing his Shield Blade into the ground while Sena hit the ground with her giant hammer before the two fist bump each other, with their Ouroboros forms appearing behind them.
Let us fight together;
Regret it never;
Our dreams will be…!
The scene changed to Lincoln and his friends, including Riku and Manana, as Lincoln held up a card as it shined brightly with the Ouroboros Ring.
Halfway to,
Forever;
Our light comes shining through!
The shadow of Z appeared over the Loud Sisters as X and Y appeared and charged in, morphing into their Moebius forms.
Reach down deep;
Beat defeat;
Do all that we can do!
Lincoln then jumped in and summoned his monsters as his friends came and merged into their Ouroboros forms and charged in, before they and Moebius attacked each other.
Halfway to,
Forever;
We've got nothing to lose!
Noah then pulled out his sword from the core of his chest, as he slashed through the Moebius, before looking at the shadow of Z.
Keep breathing;
Believing;
Halfway to forever-rrrrrr!
Everyone then charged at Z, as Lincoln drew a card from his deck, as the Ouroboros Ring shined brightly once more, as the title then appeared below everyone.
Yu-Gi-Oh: Ouroboros
(End Yu-Gi-Oh Zexal: Halfway to Forever)
Back with the Loud Family, they were continuing to walk miserably through the streets. The walk was not at all kind to them. Along the way, they all got splashed seven different times by passing cars, Lori had lost all the charge on her phone, Lola lost her tiara in a sewer drain after getting splashed. Needless to say, the Louds were NOT in a good mood. They were passing an electronics store, where they saw Lincoln on the TV, with some kind of device on his arm.
"To all you duelists in Royal Woods, Me, along with the other Top 8 Duelists in the World, are holding an open tournament for anyone who wants to have a shot to challenge us in the upcoming Duel Monsters World Championships! If you think you have what it takes to defeat us, then come to the Royal Woods Dome later today to get signed up!" Lincoln said.
His family was shocked, and not in a good way. "WHAT?! What is Lincoln doing, playing that horrible game?!" Lynn Sr. exclaimed.
"Eh, what difference does it make to us? He's Bad Luck, and is therefore, not any of our concern," Lynn Jr. stated, not wanting to get mixed up in her brother's affairs.
"I don't care if he's bad luck, good luck, or no luck, in this family, our golden rule of 'No Duel Monsters' is the law! We're heading over to the Royal Woods Dome, end of discussion!" Lynn Sr. declared. His daughters didn't like that idea, but they could tell by his tone that he was serious this time.
"One thing does puzzle me," Lisa commented, thinking about the commercial.
"What is it?" Lori asked, sounding like she didn't care.
"Lincoln is usually pretty careful about keeping secrets like this, especially considering he knows how our father unit feels about Duel Monsters," Lisa replied.
"Run that by us again, in actual English this time, and not in nerd terms?" Lynn Jr. asked rudely. Lisa was rather irked by Lynn's rudeness, but maintained her composure.
"I'm saying that Lincoln may have made that commercial as a means of WANTING us to come find him. I think he might be baiting us into a trap," Lisa clarified, only to be laughed at by her sisters.
"Do you honestly think Lincoln could EVER be smart enough to bait US into a trap? I mean, it's Lincoln!" Lori laughed.
"Besides, even if what you're saying is true, it would just prove he's bad luck!" Lynn Jr. added.
"Man, we'll never get in now! And I was looking forward to getting more footage for my channel," Luan said in disappointment, as when they arrived at the dome, where a ginormous crowd of people were gathered.
"We're going to get in, regardless!" Rita said, as they approached.
"Move aside! We're Lincoln Loud's parents!" Lynn Sr. yelled to the crowd.
Just then, some reporters rushed over to the family.
"Are you truly young Lincoln's family?"
"How does it feel being the proud parents of one of the best Duel Monsters players in the world?"
"Are any of you planning to take up Duel Monsters yourselves?"
"We are indeed his family, and we are NOT proud of Lincoln's place as a Duelist! There isn't going to be an Open Tournament, because he is going to be spending a LOT of time at home, grounded!" Lynn Sr. said, as they pushed past the crowd.
"If you want to interview a REAL winner, then how about me? I'm the best athlete in all of Royal Woods!" Lynn Jr. boasted, only to go ignored by the reporters.
Meanwhile, in the Champion's Quarters…
"What's the deal with that public announcement, Lincoln? We all know how much your Dad hates Duel Monsters," Clyde asked his best pal, who looked like he didn't have a care in the world, as he went through his cards. Lincoln's other friends, six of the other seven of the Top 8, were also present.
The first was Noah, World's Top Duelist. He has a slender body, blue eyes (with an eye patch over his right eye), and long black hair tied in a ponytail akin to a samurai. He was dressed in black clothes and a red coat.
The second was Mio, 3rd Best Duelist. She is a beautiful feline-like girl with pale skin, a small blue crystal embedded in her chest, short silver hair, and gold eyes (with an eye patch over her left eye). She was dressed in black and white attire.
Eunie, World's 5th Best Duelist, has a fairly ample bust, pale skin, shoulder-length chestnut hair, wings on the back of her head, and blue eyes (with an eye patch over her right eye). She also wears a choker, a black bodysuit with light green highlights, and a belt.
The next was Taion, the 2nd Best Duelist in the world. Taion is a young man with light brown skin, brown eyes (with an eye patch over his left eye), and short brown hair. He was dressed in dark brown, armed with two forearm guards, a white coat and a long orange scarf.
The next person was the 6th Best, Lanz. He has gray skin with a muscular physique, short white hair and brown eyes (with an eye patch over his right eye). He was dressed in a gray outfit under a cyan vest.
And Last but not least was the Number 4 Duelist, Sena. She has short dark blue hair that glows lighter at the tips, brown eyes (with an eye patch over her left eye), a small blue gem beneath her neck, and tan skin with blue lines. She wore a short navy vest, a small black top, navy shorts, long black socks, and white boots.
"It's all part of my true plan," Lincoln simply replied. Just then, some commotion was heard from outside.
"Sorry folks, but you can't go inside. Authorized personnel only," they could hear one of the security guards say.
"Well WE happen to be Lincoln Loud's family, and we're going in to confront him!" the voice of Lynn Sr. yelled. The sound of the guard grunting and some crashing sounds were heard, as the door was opened, to reveal Lincoln's family, none of whom looked too pleased.
"Lincoln Marie Loud! Do you have any idea how much trouble you're in?!" Rita yelled, as she and Lynn Sr. stormed over to him.
"Hate to burst your bubble, but you all are in FAR more trouble than I could ever be in," Lincoln spat back. Lincoln's friends were shocked. They never thought Lincoln would ever mouth off to his own parents.
"Lincoln, we are NOT playing games here! You are in more trouble than ever before!" Rita yelled.
"She's right. You literally aren't going to get away with this, twerp," Lori added, as she and the rest of her sisters got their phones ready to film the fireworks that were about to go off, little knowing that those same fireworks were going to blow up in their faces.
"Funny. I was about to say the same to you, Lori," Ross said, as he stepped out from behind a door.
"Uncle Ross? What are you doing here?" Luna asked.
"My job," Ross stated, a look of extreme disappointment on his face.
"Then do it elsewhere. This has nothing to do with you, so butt out!" Rita snapped. Ross didn't even so much as flinch, when his walkie-talkie went off.
"Ross, it's Randy... we just finished up our end of the operation, and it's worse than we thought. They sold off Lincoln's furniture and the rest of his possessions. Not to mention, there are a lot of safety violations in this rundown shack of a house," Randy's voice said. Now, the Louds were puzzled, as were Lincoln's friends.
"Sold off his possessions?" Noah said to himself, looking at Lincoln in confusion.
"Ross, what is Randy doing in our house?!" Rita demanded. A squad of cops came in, and subdued Lincoln's sisters, while some more restrained the parents.
"Tell me something Rita, are you aware that what you did to your son was not only cruel, but also illegal as well?" Ross asked.
"Wait, what the spark is he talking about?!" Lanz exclaimed.
"You'll find out soon enough," Lincoln replied nonchalantly.
"What are you talking about?! There isn't any law against locking a jinx outside of the house, right?!" Lynn Jr. exclaimed.
"On the contrary, there is. What we did can be considered child abandonment, abuse, and neglect," Lisa explained.
"You did what?!" Sena exclaimed, as Lincoln's friends gasped in shock.
"Rita and Lynn Loud Sr., you're both under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You also have the right to an attorney. If you can't afford one, then one shall be appointed. Get them out of here!" Ross ordered. The cops all dragged Lincoln's family out. All the while, Lincoln looked like he couldn't care less.
"Lincoln... what is happening?" Mio asked.
"All in due time. Let's just say my 'family' crossed the line, and now they have to pay the consequences," Lincoln replied, which made them look concerned.
A few days later…
The Courtroom was filled up with many of the Loud Families peers, whether they be friends or enemies. Word had gotten out that Lincoln was pressing charges against his family, sans Lily, since she's a baby. The Loud Family were on one end of the courtroom, with a serious looking business woman, with her hair done up in a bun, and wearing a smart suit. The family was glaring angrily at Lincoln, who was on the other end, with a man, also dressed in a suit, who looked rather important, "All rise for the honorable Judge Markus!" the bailiff boomed, as the judge took the stand.
"Please be seated!" the judge said, as everyone then sat down, "What is the case?"
"The case of Lincoln Loud VS Rita and Lynn Sr. Loud and their daughters," the bailiff replied.
"What are the charges?" the judge asked.
"They face the charges of child abuse, theft, and unacceptable living conditions, your honor. And that's only naming a few of the charges," the prosecutor replied. This incited murmurs from the courtroom.
"Order! Order in the court!"the judge said, as he banged his gavel.
"In that case, I'll have a cheeseburger, fries, and a large shake!" Luan chimed in, gaining some snickers from the room.
"This is NOT the place for jokes, young lady! Now then, what about those charges?" the judge asked.
"According to the testimony we received from the police and Lincoln Loud, his family had purposely locked him out of their house for the biased belief in 'bad luck', and refused to let him back in," the prosecutor replied. This got some gasps from the crowd, including the Loud's defense attorney, "It gets worse. Further evidence shows that the Loud Family had sold off ALL of Lincoln's personal possessions, and illegally kept the proceeds for themselves," he continued.
"In our defense, what good would Lincoln's stuff be to us? We weren't using it!" Lola exclaimed.
"Young lady, please!" the prosecutor said, as he continued reading off the charts, "And that is only a small example of injustices made around their home, which is to say nothing about various misdemeanors that occur OUTSIDE of their house," he concluded. More murmurs ensued. The judge then banged his gavel again.
"Order in the court! How do the defendants plead to these charges?" the judge asked.
"We're not the guilty ones! Lincoln is, for being bad luck! Lock him up in a prison far away from civilization, and throw away the key!" Lynn Jr. proclaimed.
"Junior, that's enough!" their attorney scolded.
"In any case, I'm sure the witnesses can clarify things," the prosecutor stated.
"Very well, you may call the first witness," the judge replied.
"Thank you. I shall call Lincoln Loud to the stand!" the prosecutor declared. This caused quite a ruckus from the Loud Sisters.
"THAT'S NOT FAIR!"
"WHY DOES HE GET TO GO FIRST?"
"HE'LL JUST SCREW EVERYTHING UP LIKE ALWAYS!"
"ORDER, I SAID!" the judge banged his gavel, as Lincoln took the stand. The bailiff approached Lincoln with a book.
"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?" he asked.
"I do solemnly swear to honesty," Lincoln replied.
"Now then, Lincoln, could you explain to the court exactly what happened on the day in question?" the prosecutor asked.
"I'd be glad to. It started out like any other day," Lincoln began.
"A few centuries later," Lori snarkily remarked.
"Lori, behave!" the family's defense attorney scolded.
"You can probably tell that with a family as big as this, and with sisters with such a diverse set of skills and talents, they would have a lot of scheduled events lined up, in which case, the rest of us go to support that particular sister. I, however, was growing tired, and thought I deserved at least one day off, where I could just relax, and recharge my batteries. I figured I could go to their next event if I didn't go on that day. However, my older sister, Lynn, wanted me to go to her softball game. I told her that I wanted to read my comics in peace, and even when I persisted in saying 'no', she went and threatened me with her bat," Lincoln explained. A lot of murmurs rose up from the courtroom.
"Junior, did you really threaten him?!" Rita snapped.
"I might've, but I wasn't going to do it! But that had nothing to do with my loss that day!" Lynn Jr. replied.
"Anyhow, I was dragged along with the rest of the family to her game, where she and her team lost to the opposing team. I went to commend her for her efforts, and do you know what she did? She labeled ME as the cause of HER loss on account of my alleged being bad luck. That's when I got the stupidest idea I ever had in my life; I figured if I could convince the others that I was bad luck, then they would ban me from all their activities. And while it did work, they started taking things a bit too far, such as barring me from activities I would've liked to go to, like the movies, as well as sealing up my room with boards and chains, and forcing me to sleep outside like an animal. The next morning, they showed little hesitation in pretty much banishing me from the house completely. Then my uncles, who are cops on the police force, found me wandering the streets in my Pjs, which pretty much led to right now," Lincoln finished explaining.
"I'm calling crap on that! Stinkcoln IS bad luck! That's the only excuse I can think of for why I lost that day!" Lynn Jr. yelled out.
"Let me hear you or anyone in your family speak out of turn like that again, and I WILL add contempt of court to your family's already lengthy list of charges!" the judge warned.
"Your honor, I would like to present various forms of evidence that could help support Lincoln's claims. First off, exhibit A!" the prosecutor said, as he pulled out a projector, and displayed a picture of Lincoln's door, sealed and boarded up, "And to add to this, Exhibit B!" he then changed slides to show the receipt for the Pawn Shop, showing very clearly the sale of a bed, a nightstand and a dresser, "As well, as Exhibit C!" he said, displaying a picture of the bat Lynn Jr. had threatened Lincoln with, "Lincoln, is this the bat in question that your sister so callously threatened you with?" the prosecutor asked.
"It is. In her own words, when I persisted about not going, she said 'Sure you don't want to reconsider?'" Lincoln replied.
"The prosecution has no further questions to ask of Lincoln," the prosecutor stated. The defense attorney then looked to the parents.
"Why didn't either of you stop this whole mess before it snowballed into this?!" she quietly asked.
"The girls all said he was bad luck, and bad stuff always seemed to happen when Lincoln was around, so it had to be true," Lynn Sr. replied. The attorney rubbed her head.
"I honestly don't know if I can or even should try defending you guys," she said.
"Rachel, you have to defend us. We're family," Rita said in a condescending tone.
"That doesn't mean a free pass to commit crimes against your own!" Rachel replied.
"Will the defense call their witness?" the judge asked, sounding impatient.
"Yes, your Honor. Defense calls Lynn Loud Sr. to the stand," Rachel said. The Loud Patriarch then took the stand, "Now then, Lynn, you consider yourself a family man, yes?"
"Well, not to toot my own horn, but I'd say so myself," Lynn Sr. replied.
"So would you say that you merely only locked your only son outside as a small punishment, like say... for an hour, and simply forgot to let him in?" Rachel asked.
"Oh good heavens, no! Lincoln's sisters all said that their brother had become bad luck, and given that bad stuff kept happening when he was around meant it had to be true. That is the same way we determine the root of ALL mishaps in the house, such as when my son clogs the toilet on a regular basis," Lynn Sr. replied.
"Hold it!" the prosecutor exclaimed, as he took the stage, "Are you saying that you willingly go along with whatever your daughters say against their brother, simply because they all believe it to be true?" he asked.
"Of course. If enough people say the same thing, then it has to be true, right? Plus Lincoln does have a history of causing trouble in the house, unintentionally on rare occasions," Lynn Sr. replied.
"Let the records show that the Loud Parents choose to enforce discipline over their children based solely on popular opinion!" the prosecutor declared.
"I allow it," the Judge declared, banging his gavel, "You may return to your seat." Lynn Sr. did so.
"Ok, that snowballed fast. Maybe you can help shed some light on this, and hopefully give something that can make defending this case easier," Rachel said to Rita.
"Will the defense call their next witness?" the Judge asked.
"Defense calls Rita Loud to the stand, your honor," Rachel said, as the Loud Mother took the stand, "Now then, Rita, do you truly care about your kids?"
"What kind of a question is that? Of course we care about them! Lynn and I struggle to make a home for our kids on a daily basis," Rita replied.
"Objection!" the prosecutor declared, as he once again took the stage, "According to evidence, provided by the officer that searched the Loud House, there were several safety violations, which shall be considered Exhibit D! Creaky floorboards, subpar plumbing, the doors were poorly attached to the frames, doorknobs constantly breaking off, etc. Can you really call that caring for your children if their lives are constantly put in danger?" he asked.
"Well, as you can tell, a large family such as ours requires a lot of food to survive. Plus, the handiwork done by myself and Lynn is just as good as a professional's work, right?" Rita asked.
"Not quite. There are certain tasks that only a true professional can fix, and should be called in to fix. I understand that food may be scarce in your house, but making the accommodations suitable for living has to be your top priority," the prosecutor explained.
"Well don't blame us for our lack of funds! Taking care of 11 kids is not as easy as it seems!" Rita replied.
"It's like the old saying goes, 'if you can't handle something, DON'T try to do it!' No further questions," the prosecutor said.
"You may return to your seat Mrs. Loud. Defense may now call the next witness," the judge said. Honestly, Rachel wasn't sure what to do now. Her sister and brother in law were her best bet in clearing things up, but it only seemed to make the case worse. She hoped for the best, as she looked to her nieces.
"Uh, yes, your honor. Defense calls Lisa Loud to the stand," Rachel said. The child prodigy then took to the stand.
"Lisa, you're a very intelligent young lady, right?" the prosecutor asked.
"My PH.D speaks for my intellect. Many of my experiments done inside my bedroom can attest to that," Lisa replied.
"So, why would someone of such high IQ give in to such a ridiculous notion of bad luck?" he asked.
"I guess I might as well come clean. I knew all along Lincoln was faking being bad luck," Lisa replied.
"Wait, so you knew he was faking it? And you did NOTHING to stop this whole mess?" the prosecutor asked.
"Well, after Lori told Lincoln that family supporting each other is mandatory, and after Lori banning him from her golf tournament after breaking her clubs, I became curious as to why someone would be so rational one minute, then irrational the next minute. Which is how my experiment began. Unfortunately, I failed to take the legality of what we put Lincoln through," Lisa explained.
"You are aware that human experimentation is illegal, yes?" the prosecutor asked.
"Human experimentation is vital for the advancement of the human race. Besides, I was going to give him a dollar for his troubles," Lisa said defensively.
"And what about your experiments? How dangerous would you describe them to be?" the prosecutor asked, showing a slide, labeled "Exhibit E", which showed Lisa's "laboratory".
"Well, many of the chemical and mechanical experiments I engage in have blown the roof off of the house on some occasions. But I always try to keep them contained," Lisa replied.
"Your parents allow you, a four year old, to handle dangerous chemicals?" the prosecutor asked.
"Scientific exploration shouldn't be condemned by the refusal of others," Lisa replied. The prosecutor shook his head.
"No further questions, Lisa. You may return to your seat," the prosecutor said.
"Your honor, may I speak freely, to add more testimony?" Lincoln requested.
"I'll allow it," the judge replied.
"Lisa's experiments aren't the only example of dangerous stuff my sisters do. Luan and Lana, in particular, do all kinds of dangerous stuff as well. Luan goes overboard with her April Fools Day pranks, and Lana wrestles live alligators as a hobby," Lincoln replied.
"Which one is which? I'm all turned around," the judge asked.
"Luan is the one in the white top with the yellow plaid skirt, and Lana is the one in overalls," Lincoln replied.
"Would you care to elaborate on the pranks that Luan does for April Fools Day?" the judge asked.
"Certainly. One year, she had raccoons in the oven when I was tripping all of her pranks on purpose, which then attacked me, she had Lana dropped into a pit of rhubarb pies, knowing full well that Lana is allergic, and she once even dumped a bucket of bleach on Lucy, who's the one in black," Lincoln explained. The entire courtroom gasped in shock at the atrocious horrors Luan puts her own family through.
"Hmm, that certainly does put in more testimony against your family. Luan Loud, can you confirm these allegations?" the judge asked. Luan thought of making a light joke, but chose against it, feeling the pressure of the case.
"I-I-I can and do confirm that these were some of the many pranks I pulled on my family," Luan nervously replied.
"I was thinking of calling you to the stand, but that seems pointless at this point," the prosecutor commented.
"This case is getting worse by the minute," Rachel rubbed her temples. Then, she got an idea for a possible way out of this, "Your honor, the defense will call Lori Loud to the stand," she said, but Lori was too preoccupied with her phone. The bailiff went over, and took it from her.
"Hey, I was in the middle of a text!" Lori snapped.
"Lori, it's your turn," Rachel said, her tone sounding like forced patience.
"Oh, ok," Lori said, as she went over to the stand.
"Now then, Lori, you're the oldest sister of the household, correct?" the prosecutor asked.
"I am," Lori replied.
"And you know that you have certain responsibilities that you have to do, yes?" the prosecutor asked.
"I do, but I only do it so I can focus on really important matters," Lori replied, sounding like she couldn't care less.
" And what matters could possibly be more important than your family? As the oldest sibling, you have to set a good example to ALL of your younger siblings," the prosecutor questioned.
"I do set a good example for my siblings, right guys?" Lori asked her sisters, only for them to look a bit uncomfortable, "R-Right?" she now sounded uneasy.
"Well, you are a bit too bossy sometimes," Luna replied.
"You focus more on your phone and your boyfriend than you do your family," Lisa replied.
"And you always make us do favors for you in exchange for driving us to places," Lana added.
"Not to mention, you always use your status as the oldest sibling as an excuse for first dibs on stuff," Luan added.
"I don't have any siblings of my own, but I can say for certain, that these qualities they just listed off are NOT examples of a GOOD role model. You could've helped to stop this mess before it festered into this whole circus we have right now!" the prosecutor stated.
"Look, a family this big is quite stressful on all of us, and... Wait, why am I even telling you any of this? This is a family matter, and YOU are not part of our family!" Lori proclaimed.
"Hey, that's right! Why are we even letting ourselves be trapped here, anyway? You all should butt out!" Lola exclaimed.
"ENOUGH! I think we've heard enough from Lori. The defense may call your next witness," the judge declared.
"I don't know who I can call to the stand," Rachel replied.
"I'll take it from here! I can smooth things out with this," Lynn Jr. boasted.
"Highly unlikely. You'd most likely make things much worse for us than the rest of us probably will," Lisa stated.
"Alright then, the defense calls Lynn Loud Jr. to the stand," Rachel reluctantly said. Lynn Jr. then leapt up into the stand.
"Please don't do that again. Such behavior is not tolerated here," the judge asked of Lynn Jr.
"Now then, Lynn Jr., do you truly think your brother is bad luck?" the prosecutor asked.
"No, I don't think he's bad luck," Lynn Jr. replied.
"Junior, you know you're all under oath, yes?" the prosecutor asked.
"I know, just like I KNOW he's bad luck! The Squirrels have dominated the league up until the game Stinkcoln decided to jinx it with his bad luck, all out of spite for not letting him read his stupid comics. That's the only logical excuse I can think of!" Lynn Jr. replied.
"What about if the other team was simply better than you? They could've practiced more, and planned things more accordingly to take you and your team on," the prosecutor questioned.
"Are you actually suggesting that I'M wrong about this?! Stinkcoln jinxing my game out of spite is a perfectly logical excuse!" Lynn Jr. was starting to lose her temper.
"And that's another thing... The truly great athletes in the pro sports leagues don't make excuses for their losses. They just deal with it, and move on. What makes you think you're better than the pros?" the prosecutor asked.
"You're just some pencil pushing nerd. What do you know about sports? The Softball Gods chose ME to be their messiah of sports!" Lynn Jr. snapped.
"Here we go," Lincoln commented, rolling his eyes.
"And just who are these 'Softball Gods'? Are they actual deities, or just figments of the imagination of an egotistical, entitled brat who thinks she's the best because she wins a few games?" the prosecutor aggressively asked.
"You're just jealous because I'm better than anyone in Royal Woods at sports," Lynn Jr. replied.
"No further questions. You may return to your seat," the prosecutor said, before turning his attention to the judge, "Your honor, I know that the testimony we have from the Louds is more than enough to ensure a guilty verdict, but I have a list of people who also have had... less than pleasant experiences with the Louds, that I would like to call to the stand to provide further testimony," the prosecutor declared.
"I'll allow it. ALL of their crimes need to be brought to light," the judge declared. From that point onward, things spiraled more out of the Louds control, as various people came in and provided testimony against them. Such faces included the manager of the local supermarket, who provided security footage, showing the Loud Sisters behaving like wild animals, many of the neighbors from the Loud House neighborhood, who all complained about the ridiculous amounts of noise, and finally, the parents of all of Lynn's teammates, who testified for their kids having health problems due to Lynn's superstitions. Even Lindsey Sweetwater, Lola's Pageant Rival, came in and told everyone about Lola's darkest secret, which caused everyone to be horrified at the not-so-much-a princess' actions.
"Your honor, might I call for a recess so my clients and I can try to go over a possible defense, if possible?" Rachel requested.
"I'll allow it. I do believe in a fair, fighting chance," the judge decided. The Louds and Rachel all went into the next room.
Meanwhile, the prosecutor and Lincoln had looks of satisfaction on their faces, as they felt the case was already won.
"Well Lincoln, looks like once again, justice favors the weary," the prosecutor said.
"True, but me and my friends have an idea to rub more salt into their wounds," Lincoln replied, as he looked at his friends, who nodded.
In the next room,
"I can not believe you all! I thought you said you never did anything wrong!" Rachel berated her sister and her family.
"That's because we didn't do anything bad. How is locking out a jinx like Stinkcoln even remotely illegal?" Lynn Jr. questioned.
"Because he is a minor! He needs proper shelter!" Rachel yelled.
"Well, if you say it like that, then it does sound bad," Lynn Jr. replied, still refusing to realize how much trouble she and her family was in. Rachel pinched the bridge of her nose, when she got an idea.
"Ok, there's one last thing that I can think of doing that can at least lighten your guy's sentence. We have to do a plea bargain," Rachel said.
"What's that?" Lola asked.
"It's when the defense attorney negotiates with the prosecutor, and tries to work out an agreement to lift some of the charges. I can't guarantee it'll lift all of the charges, but just enough to lighten your sentence," Rachel explained.
"Well, with all the testimony that everyone has brought in against us, we don't have many alternatives," Lynn Sr. stated.
"If it'll keep Lincoln from winning this thing over us, then I'm all for it," Lola declared. The others all gave their votes of agreement, except for Lynn Jr.
"NO! We are not doing that! It's pretty much quitting! And Lynn Loud Jr. is no quitter!" she stubbornly declared.
"Junior, this is no time for one of your ego trips," Rachel replied, trying to remain patient.
"Relax. I have a speech that's sure to win this whole thing for us, and keep Stinkcoln in the Looser Zone, where he belongs!" Lynn Jr. said, handing a sheet of paper to her aunt. Reading it over, Rachel shook her head.
"You've got to be kidding, Junior. Something like this will basically ensure a guilty verdict!" Rachel replied.
"Look, Aunt Rachel, I get that you're trying to help us out, but I am sick and tired of never being respected for my skills as an athlete. Instead of being treated like a celebrity everywhere I go, it's always the same old thing; 'That's not allowed', 'Such behavior will not be tolerated', 'Please Be Quiet' are all I ever hear!" Lynn Jr. said.
"That's because being a good athlete isn't the same as a free pass to be rude to everyone around you," Rachel replied.
"I am NOT merely a 'good' athlete, I AM THE BEST! In fact, I'm even more than that! I'm practically a demigoddess of sports!" Lynn Jr. boasted. Seeing as she wasn't going to get through to her niece, Rachel threw her hands up into the air in frustration.
"THAT'S IT!" she screamed, as she started packing her things.
"What do you think you're doing, Rachel?" Rita asked.
"This case is clearly too much of a lost cause, all because your daughter is prioritizing her ego and self-image over trying to take the easy way out! I tried to be reasonable, but it's clear my opinion isn't wanted here! I QUIT!" Rachel yelled.
"You literally can't quit! You have to defend us and prove our innocence!" Lori exclaimed.
"That's the problem, Lori! You guys aren't innocent! There's too much testimony against you for me to formulate a defense for you guys! And you know what? I've defended murders and armed robbers who were much easier to defend than any of you! You're all on your own!" Rachel yelled, as she stormed out.
"Well, looks like we have to win this case ourselves now. Thankfully, I have my speech," Lynn Jr. commented.
"I sincerely doubt that will help, based solely on Aunt Rachel's reaction, Lynn. Family, I highly recommend that we attempt a plea bargain, like Aunt Rachel suggested," Lisa recommended.
"Then it's decided! My speech it is then!" Lynn Jr. declared.
"Didn't you hear what I said?!" Lisa yelled.
"Yeah, I don't really understand most of what you say, so I just don't bother listening. Like anyone should," Lynn Jr. replied.
"Family, I implore you to take the path of the Plea Bargain," Lisa insisted.
"We're a family, and we support ourselves!" Lynn Jr. countered. The rest of their sisters and their parents looked torn between the two of them, before Lynn Sr. and Rita made a decision.
The Louds all piled out of the room, where Lincoln and the prosecutor were waiting, with smug looks on their faces, "What happened to your Defense Attorney?" the judge asked.
"She up and abandoned us, saying this case was a lost cause, for whatever reason," Lynn Jr. replied.
"Hmm, hard to imagine why," the prosecutor mumbled.
"Alright, I believe we have enough testimony for the jury to reach a verdict. Before they do so, does the prosecution and defense have anything they want to say?" the judge asked.
"Indeed I do, you honor," the prosecutor replied, as he stepped forth, "Members of the jury, it is clear, based on ALL the evidence that not only Rita and Lynn Sr. are terrible parents, but their daughters have all been raised to be the sociopath monsters they've been made out to be, and the fact that they purposely allow all 11 of their kids to live in a dangerously unsafe house. Based on the evidence provided by all the witnesses, I can say without a doubt that all 11 members of the Loud Family on the defense MUST be declared guilty, and punished to the fullest extent of the law," the prosecutor said, before taking his seat.
"And will the defense say anything?" the judge asked.
"Indeed we do," Lisa said, before Lynn Jr. jumped out to the floor.
"And I know what we have to say for ourselves! First of all, all of that 'testimony' and 'evidence' is a lot of bull crap, forged by Stinkcoln to make us all look bad, and the testimony provided by everyone else NOT in our family should NOT even be taken into account! Secondly, is in regards to the law itself. The law is there to maintain order, sure, but it also holds us back from reaching our fullest potential. In the case of ME, the law should take a backseat, especially when something as important as a Softball Championship League is brought into question. If Stinkcoln shows up to the Squirrel's doubleheader to make up for the loss HE caused with his bad luck, then the wrath of the softball gods will rain down upon us all! Which is why I ask the jury to find ME and my family NOT Guilty, and have Stinkcoln banished from Royal Woods forever! Also, as an apology for making us sit through this grandiose waste of time, you could erect a statue of the great ME in MY honor. I have nothing more to say," Lynn Jr. said. Both Lincoln and the prosecutor, and pretty much all of the courtroom were slack jawed as Lynn's speech.
"Alright then. The jury will meet to discuss the verdict, and it will be final," the judge said, as the jury went into the next room. Meanwhile, the rest of the Loud Family glared angrily at Lynn.
"Lynn, what the heck?!" Luna yelled.
"We agreed that we were going to do a plea bargain!" Rita yelled.
"That's right, YOU guys agreed on quitting this case, but I took matters into my own hands. The win has been assured," Lynn Jr. replied, kicking up her feet.
"I can't believe how stupid Lincoln's sister is," Taion commented.
"I know, right? The win was pretty much given to him on a silver platter," Eunie replied. Just then, the jury came back.
"Has the jury reached the verdict?" the judge asked.
"We have your honor," one of the jurors replied. Lynn Jr. had a look of amusement, as she leaned in, with her hand to her ear, anticipating in vain the verdict she wanted, "We the jury find the 11 members of the Loud Family GUILTY of ALL charges," he said. The Louds were horrified to hear those words, with Lynn being the most dumbfounded.
'How can this be?! My speech was flawless!' she thought, before she looked over to her brother, who had a look of amusement on his face, 'Stinkcoln! That good for nothing jinx caused another loss for ME!' Lynn thought. "I DEMAND A RECOUNT!" she yelled.
"Out of the question. The jury's verdict is final," the judge refused.
"But this isn't fair! The only reason WE lost is because of Stinkcoln! Him, and his bad luck!" Lynn Jr. argued.
"Kid, listen," one of the jurors began, "Your brother and his supposed 'bad luck' has nothing to do with the fact that you guys broke several laws, and have been rightfully tried for it. That abysmal speech of yours was the final nail in that coffin," he said.
"No! I refuse to accept this!" Lynn Jr. yelled.
"That's enough!" the judge yelled.
"STAY OUT OF THIS! THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU, OR ANYONE ELSE INVOLVED IN THIS CASE!" the sporty sister yelled.
"Kid, you just don't want to accept a loss because of your overinflated ego! You're so obsessed with winning, that you forgot the most important thing about sports; the fact that it's supposed to be about having fun! Instead, you prioritize winning so much that it turned you into a self absorbed, spoiled brat, who thinks if she throws a big enough fit, then things will go her way! But that's not how the world works! It's time you and your family got a major reality check, instead of being such a sore loser!" another juror yelled.
What happened next added more salt to the Loud Family's wound. Lynn then threw the table over at the prosecution side of the courtroom, and went on to wreck everything she could get her hands on. Things were getting so bad, that several cops had to come in, and taser her.
"GET HER OUT OF MY COURTROOM!" the judge boomed. The cops then proceeded to drag the unconscious Lynn out of the room, leaving only the rest of the Loud Family to suffer whatever fate the judge had in store for them, "As for you, why didn't you stop your daughter?!" he demanded.
"Well, Junior seemed to have a lot of anger to vent, and we've learned it's best not to disturb her," Lynn Sr. replied.
"I need a lot of aspirin after this. In any case, because of the actions of you and your daughters, Rita and Lynn Sr., I hereby sentence you to spend either five years in the county prison, or one and a half to two years in the Facility," the judge declared. The Louds all blanched at the punishment the parents had in store for them. From what they've heard of the Facility, it made a regular prison seem like summer camp in comparison, "Meanwhile, your daughters, Lori, Luan, Lynn Jr., Lola, and Lisa will be sentence to the Juvenile Facility, while Leni and Lucy will be sent to the Royal Woods Mental Institute to help them with their lack of common sense and depression respectively until they get a better handle on their problems. Meanwhile, the other two of your daughters are sent to behavioral correction camp for the entire summer! In addition, not only will ALL of his furniture and belongings be returned to him, but you will pay Lincoln every cent you got from selling his furniture, PLUS interest, and Lisa's PH.D will be revoked!" the judge proclaimed.
"But we can't afford that!" Rita exclaimed.
"Well, I see no reason why we shouldn't do unto you as you did unto your son," the judge replied.
"What does he mean?" Lana asked.
"He means that OUR stuff will be sold the same way we sold all of Lincoln's possessions," Lisa replied.
"Lincoln, you stay OUT of our rooms!" Lori yelled, followed by the other sisters.
"ORDER IN THE COURT!" The judge banged his gavel loudly, "Furthermore, custody of Lincoln AND his sisters will be divided upon their Aunts and Uncles on Rita's side, and a restraining order of fifteen feet will be placed on Lincoln, keeping the two of you from ever coming into contact with him! This sentence is final!"
"Permission to speak, your honor?" Lincoln asked, catching everyone's attention.
"Lincoln, shut up, and sit down! You've caused enough damage for one lifetime!" Lori ordered.
"That's enough out of you, Ms. Loud!" the judge snapped, causing Lori to sit down herself, "Now then, what is it that you wish to say, Lincoln?" the judge asked.
"Call me biased, but I still think that my sisters should enjoy at least a few months of summer, which is why I, along with my friends, want to propose a wager to the nine of my sisters who are guilty." Lincoln explained.
"And that is?" the judge asked.
"In two weeks, they must enter and win the Duel Monsters World Championship." Lincoln said, making the entire Courtroom gasp in shock, except for the Top Duelists.
"NO! I will never allow it! It's bad enough that you play that game, Lincoln, which you're going to be so grounded for, but you are NOT dragging your sisters down to your level!" Lynn Sr. yelled.
"Mr. Loud, consider this the final warning! One more outburst out of you, your wife or any of your daughters, and additional counts of contempt of court shall be added to your list of charges!" the judge yelled, before turning back to Lincoln, "Seeing as how it's clear you have very little say in any matters regarding your family, I will allow your proposition. Would you like to add your parent's sentence to the deal?"
"Not a chance! Those two have proven time and time again that they're unfit to be parents, and should be justly punished for their lack of common sense," Lincoln replied.
"If that is your wish, then I won't force you to change your mind. Now then, as for the tournament, will there be any special rules set in place?" the judge asked.
"Yes, actually. The most important thing is that absolutely NO lucky charms or luck rituals will be allowed during the Tournament. The girls will be frisked before they enter the arena, and will be closely monitored during the duel. If any of them is caught with a lucky charm or performing any lucky ritual, then that particular sister will automatically be disqualified, and be shipped out to her intended punishment, and for each round they win, one month will be taken off their punishment."
"May I ask a question?" someone in the jury asked. "Why the World Championship? And why one month off per round?"
"Excellent question. One, like I said, the Championship is in two weeks; that gives them plenty of time to not only learn the rules, but to build decks, and formulate tons of strategies. The other reason is that if they want their freedom, they have to earn it, and the tournament with the world's best is a perfect way to get it. Of course, I will also offer them an easy way to get only a month of their punishment, but it has to be Lynn who has to do it," Lincoln explained.
""And what might that be?" the judge asked.
"She has to make a public apology, not only to myself, but all of her sports teams as well, for all their health issues, and for her overzealous belief in luck," Lincoln replied.
"Oh dear, then it really is going to be the Duel for us," Lisa whispered, as she and the rest of the family knew she would never go through with it.
"You realize that if I decide to go through with this, then you and the other duelists must NOT hold back!" the Judge said explicitly.
"Fine by me, I wasn't planning on taking it easy on them anyway," Lincoln replied.
"Very well. If these are the conditions, then I shall declare this case closed!" the judge once again banged his gavel. Some cops came in and proceeded to escort Rita and Lynn Sr. out of the courtroom, followed by their daughters. As they walked, they saw several of their peers, as well as their Grandfather and Aunt Ruth, all looking at them with looks of disgust and disappointment. They soon exited the courtroom, where Ross and Randy were waiting.
"Rachel told us what happened," Randy commented.
"Not so lucky now, huh?" Ross asked harshly.
"But this isn't OUR fault! Lincoln's the one who lied about being bad luck!" Lori exclaimed.
"Remind me, WHO could've talked him out of it?" Ross questioned.
"Fair point, but we're not going to play that stupid card game, especially not with that little home wrecker, Lincoln," Lori replied.
"Well no one exactly TOLD you to lock him out and banish him from your home in the first place!" Randy yelled, as the cops forced the Loud Parents into a police car, and drove off.
"Plus, you don't exactly have a choice regarding the tournament," Lincoln said, joining the group, "Part of the arrangement states that if any of you girls don't show up at the specified time, then it'll count as a forfeit for that particular sister, and you'll carry out the sentence as the judge decided. Extensions will NOT be given," he added, as he got into Ross' car, while Randy ushered the sisters into another large police car, where Lynn Jr was still tasered, but was slowly coming to.
"Ugh, what happened?" she slurred.
"You want us to start before or after your little tantrum? Basically, Lincoln has set up a wager that regardless of a win or loss, all nine of us will be losing a sizable chunk of our summer," Lisa replied.
"Huh? What do you mean?" Lynn Jr. asked, as she was able to shake off the numb feeling. Her sisters then proceeded to explain everything to her, about the Duel, and the requirements to get out of it, "Stinkcoln wants me to apologize for being right, and looking out for my team's winning streak?! How low is that jinx going to go?!" she exclaimed.
"The judge had accepted his proposal, and the sentence is now set in stone. Unless you apologize, we have no way out of this, except learning how to play Duel Monsters," Lucy replied.
"Well, it should be a cakewalk for us if Stinkcoln is our opponent. He's an amateur and the Loud Family's designated loser. At least I'll be able to avenge my loss for that game he ruined," Lynn replied.
"I wouldn't be too sure. Remember the advertisement for that Open Tournament he had announced? It would appear that he's one of the best duelists in the World," Lisa replied.
"Then the best duelists must be pretty weak if that loser is one of them," Lynn snarled.
"No matter what the standards, we may be in way over our heads with this. Did you dudes see the looks on our friend's faces? It looks like the court case has turned them and probably all of Royal Woods against us," Luna pointed out.
"We just need to win against Stinkcoln and reclaim our honor. Once we do that, we can get Lincoln banished from Royal Woods, and things will go back to normal. Easy peasy," Lynn replied nonchalantly. They soon arrived at a place that looked like a jailhouse.
"Why are we here?" Lana asked.
"This will serve as your dwellings for the time being. You'll get warm food, and proper shelter and plumbing. Each morning until the Duel, you'll be taken to the Rec Center to begin your lessons in Duel Monsters," Randy replied, as he let his nieces out, and ushered them inside.
Author's Note:
This is a story based off of No Such Duel by magicianofthecosmos, along with elements of Xenoblade Chronicles 3.
https/www.streem.tech/poll/770
https/www.streem.tech/poll/783
To vote, click or enter the links above.