Well, this story takes place after what I like to call the bitterest ending of the game. It's the most realistic, and it's the most hopeful, because V isn't exactly a stranger to a fresh start. And although I think it's fucking bullshit that he becomes just an NPC after I spent 132 hours playing as this son of a bitch on my first playthrough on pc(I have it on ps4, but I only just bought it on pc along with the expansion. I played it a while ago, but it was still pretty buggy so I didn't pay much attention to it), that's not what bothers me.
It's a realistic and very straightforward ending, a slap in the face to happy endings and clichés where everything ends well, and I like that.
However, my particular problem was with the way Panam and the Aldecaldos were portrayed. Like, are you serious? Just a phone call telling him never to call again?! Fuck's that?!
I understand the anger, and I understand that they moved on, but they didn't even think "Wow, this guy is alive and contacted us after all this time after saving our fucking lives on a few occasions and rescuing our leader, what could have happened?" Nothing?!
Especially after having Panam as a partner (As has always been my case, Panam is the best partner in the game... until that ending, fucking shit). Weren't they the ones who said they did everything for the family? Didn't they consider V part of the family?! What kind of scam is this?!
Anyway, that's my only "problem", apart from the fact that there are still some things left unanswered, and I only wrote this story as a way of having a more "closed ending". I'm not going to make a cute romance where everything ends well in the end, but just close the story, give the characters a destiny. And to be honest, that's more for me than for anyone else. (Fuck, I cried on four different occasions in this fucking game, no fucking way am I going to leave it at that)
"Ah, Night City... you know, I'll tell you what, from one legend to another." Johnny said, picking up another of his cigarettes and lighting it in front of his mouth. "That city didn't deserve your efforts."
V leaned his head back on the seat as he looked out over the city landscape, trying not to think about that VA and where the fuck it would take him, let alone what would happen next. He just wanted to rest... close his eyes and not worry about anything else.
"Maybe... but the services paid well." V replied, completely ignoring the two men next to him. Honestly, he was still a little wary of Reed... he didn't know if the guy was the most forgiving person he'd ever met, or if the whole thing was a set-up.
Well, there was nothing he could do about it now.
And deep down, he almost didn't care.
"Ah, yes... those services of yours, Mr. Hands, El Clown... fuck, even Rogue... they weren't worth a damn." Johnny said, sitting down by the VA window and taking a drag from his cigarette.
V, for his part, almost laughed at this, a little mockery welling up inside him.
"You're really going to tell me you didn't like it?" Johnny snorted, remaining silent for a few moments.
"Okay, fine, I admit it was fun. But the whole thing... it just seems like a waste of time to me." Johnny took another drag, blowing out the smoke as he lowered his head. "All the cars you bought, the houses, the apartments..."
"Hey, wait a minute, what's the matter with you? What, do you think the surgery won't work? We're not even there." V said, staring at Johnny with extra attention in his eyes, as serious as he could manage despite his tiredness.
"Something called intuition, V. At this point, I figured you'd already developed yours." Johnny said, taking another drag from his cigarette, before flicking it away from the VA. "Remember what I said in that junkyard? After you found my gun and my car with that little prick?" Johnny asked, turning his head slightly towards V, who in turn sighed softly, clasping his hands together.
"Yeah... I remember."
"Yeah, well, nothing's changed. It's my life for yours, without even blinking. However, would I be lying if I said I wasn't... I don't know, disappointed? Hm... I don't even know if that's the fucking word." Johnny said, sighing heavily and resting his arms on his knees.
"Disappointed? For what? For agreeing to the surgery? Choosing the safest method?" V asked, his tone high, but not angry, just tired and a little frustrated.
"No... disappointed in myself. You were right about a lot of things... that I refused to see until now." Johnny replied, taking off his glasses.
"As fucked up as it sounds, I think we've both learned from it... but to be honest, for a moment there, I thought you were going to judge me." V said, closing his eyes tightly, trying to relax in that place, but it seemed as impossible as the idea that one day his luck would turn in his favor.
The silence lasted for a few moments, save for the brief, low conversations between the two men sent by Reed.
"I don't judge... in fact, I've been putting myself in your shoes. I think it's a fair exchange. I'm killing you, so you kill me first." V couldn't control a sigh this time, and lowered his head, his right hand resting on his forehead.
"Johnny-"
"No, dude, it's the truth. Fuck... maybe I just had this fucking hope that things would be different." Silverhand said, dragging himself back a little, stretching out his legs and leaning on his arms afterwards, still looking out at the Night City landscape, which was now getting further and further away. "Fuck me, I'm turning into a little bitch just like you." V snorted in derision.
"You're a dick."
"And you're a cunt. We actually fit together after all." V could do nothing but laugh a little. An asshole, that Johnny, all the way. But fuck, he'd be lying if he said he hadn't enjoyed the journey, even though he was literally dying because of it.
Fuck, Johnny was starting to make sense. Maybe he was really fucked up in the head to sympathize with fucking Johnny Silverhand, the man with the most fucked up head he'd ever met.
"You know, Johnny... as much as you might not believe it... I'm sorry." V began, leaning his head back on the seat. "I'm sorry it couldn't be any other way... as much as we fight a lot sometimes... fuck, I don't know... you're kind of a nice guy. To be honest, I kind of like you." He said, and Johnny stared at him for a few moments. His eyes, always so arrogant, so fed up with everything, always thinking he was so much more, now had raised eyebrows.
And that just made V roll his eyes.
"Well, I'm flattered, but I'm not one to fly a kite with other people's dicks"
"Not like that, asshole."Johnny let out an amused laugh.
"... Fuck, you're a good guy, V. I'm sure we'd be great chooms in another life. I don't know what went wrong in this one." Johnny said, and V lowered his head, leaning his torso slightly to the side, resting his elbows just above his knees.
He didn't know if he was going mad, or if it was a consequence of the relic, but the thought that Johnny would no longer be there in a few hours left him with a feeling of emptiness.
"It's simple, even... we're too similar. You have your principles, your ideals, and you're fucking stubborn. I have my principles, my ideals, and I'm fucking stubborn." V said, without looking at Johnny, but he knew he was paying attention to every word.
He closed his eyes and allowed himself to swim through his memories, from the moment he took that job with Jackie... being shot and killed by that piece of shit DeShawn... everything up to that certain moment.
Fuck... his hand went to his chest, an icy sensation ran through his body. And suddenly, he felt he should have explained himself better to his friends on the phone. Said more to Panam, Vik, Misty...
"You know, Johnny... fuck, I can't believe I'm going to say this, but... it was a pleasure to have met you. But you don't have to." V raised his head as he heard Johnny grunt softly. He was standing at the moment, leaning on the VA as he watched the wasteland below.
"And since when does telling me what to do work, huh?" he said, crossing his arms. "V, I've hoped for a lot of things in my life, and people I cared about have gotten hurt, died... on second thought, now, I don't need that happening again. Maybe ending it this way is the best thing for everyone." Johnny said, turning to V, now leaning with his back against the VA.
"Still... I kind of... don't want you to die." V said, a little quieter now. "I think I've been looking at you as a friend for a while now, and not just as a voice in my head. At many times, you've helped me, even saved me." Johnny let out a nasal laugh, holding his glasses in both hands and staring at the lenses with a faraway look.
"The Relic was your life support. I didn't do anything, you survived on your own. And I'll tell you, I'm fucking proud of that." He shook his head. "But I still consider you the dumbest mercenary in Night City."
V rolled his eyes, and almost let out another sigh.
"Fuck, really, Johnny? You ruined the moment."
"Being talked into a brain dance by a random guy on a random street in the dump that is Night City... I'm sorry, V, but you being captured like that was the dumbest thing I've ever seen. That and Kerry's name ideas." Johnny joked.
"Ah, fuck you, Johnny." V ran his hand through his hair. "Yeah, right, I admit it was stupid." He said it quietly, perhaps a little embarrassed to admit it, or too proud to say it out loud, whatever the reason, he knew Johnny heard it all the same.
V turned to the landscape outside the VA. Slowly, he rested his head on his hand, letting himself admire the view for a few moments.
"Sorry I couldn't kill smasher." Johnny took a step forward and waved his hand.
"Forget about it. Right now, I prefer to imagine that his time will come, someday. And well, if there's anything I've learned from you, it's that revenge is almost never worth it." V looked at him with an arched eyebrow.
"And you really believe that? I didn't really think so." Johnny shook his head.
"Not even a little. But this isn't the time to think about that, this isn't the time to think about that cunt." He said, crossing his arms again.
They were both silent for a while again, and as much as he didn't like it, V was feeling... overly sentimental, perhaps.
The cold feeling in his chest was only spreading, an unusual anxiety was beginning to run through his body.
This was his chance, wasn't it? The chance to finally get his life back, to survive. That was what he had been looking for all along. So why did he feel as if part of him was about to die?
"You know, V... we've been through a lot to get here, and that's what counts. I'm proud to call you my friend... and I'm going to miss you."
I've got readings spiking - strong emotions
V didn't even complain when he felt the doctor next to him apply something to his body, his eyes focused on Johnny's, and there he felt that they were finally being completely honest with each other.
Sometimes sweet lady fate really was a bitch. It had taken so long for them to finally leave things out in the open... too late, though.
"Johnny..."V whispered his name, feeling his body go soft, his eyes getting heavier and heavier. He saw Johnny sit down on the floor next to his feet.
"I think this is it, kiddo." He said, putting his glasses back on his face, his voice slurred. V could feel it, this was as hard for Johnny as it was for him.
"Promise me something, okay?" Johnny asked, and V struggled to open his eyes once more, gently shaking his head.
"... I promise, whatever it is." His vision blurred a little.
"I'm not saying to never give up. Sometimes you have to let go. Just don't let people change who you are." V couldn't open his eyes this time, but he was still conscious, and he felt Johnny's voice drifting away with each passing moment.
"Johnny..."
"Good night, Vincent. Today was a good day." His voice seemed even more distant, echoing in the back of his mind, and it was with these words that he gave in to the darkness.
Well, well, looks like fortune favors the stupid, too
Johnny's words flew through his head, but the voice certainly wasn't that of the legendary "terrorist" from Night City. No, it was as if he was talking to himself.
Or maybe things had been reversed, and now he was a construct in Silverhand's head. He didn't know, but he fucking felt strange.
He tried to call out to him, to say something, but he couldn't. He tried to move, but his body wouldn't respond. All he could do was try to open his eyes, and he succeeded to some extent.
A window with a view of a tree not far away was the first thing he saw. It was still blurry, his vision shaky, maybe what he had seen hadn't even been a tree, but it certainly looked enough like one.
After that, he went back into the darkness. He heard someone calling him from the background, but he couldn't really recognize the voice, even though it sounded so familiar.
He felt a tingling in his arm, a slight weight next to him, as if someone had sat down right next to him.
"... Signals are normal..." He could hear... a woman. He blinked again, his vision still blurred and shaky, but he could see what looked like a nurse standing in front of his bed.
His mind was a mess, the noise around him was muffled, but it seemed so loud that he was almost going mad.
Why this obsession with Swedenfuck? Hoping once you find him he'll spill the meaning of life? Here, I'll save you the trouble - life makes no sense.
Just when you think you're in deep shit, life comes along and sinks you even deeper. For some reason, that phrase made a lot of sense in that moment of confusion.
They weren't dreams, V. They were memories.
I didn't trust you, the situation forced me to change.
I'm giving you options, V. Options...
He tried to move, and almost grunted as voices and more voices began to echo through his head. Vik, Takemura, Misty... Reed.
"Can you hear me?" Reed's voice was now clearer than ever. He felt his senses returning little by little.
He opened his eyes again... his vision became clearer. Reed was standing beside his bed, staring at him with eyes that were at once serious but carried a certain sympathy and even a kind of relief.
The first thing he thought was that Reed had changed, a lot, in fact. The last time he'd seen him, he'd had a robust body, the kind that looked like it never missed a day at the gym. And now, although he still had a certain amount of muscle, he certainly didn't have that belly before.
Not to mention that he looked... too casual, perhaps? No, maybe wasn't the right definition. He no longer looked like someone who took matters into his own hands, who was in deep shit as a soldier. No, he now looked like the kind of person who sat in a fucking office, signing papers.
Not to mention... he looked like he'd aged. However, it could be that he was seeing things, still a little confused, disoriented, not least because he had just woken up.
"I can... hear you..." V said, almost regretting it afterwards. His throat felt like it was on fire, and his voice came out slurred, like it was tearing his throat. "And apparently... talk..." It was strange, his voice was strange, he didn't sound like himself.
"Good... Great, actually." He said, lightly touching his left arm.
V blinked a few times, now more used to the brightness.
"You look... different." He said, and noticed the rapid change in the man. Reed stepped back a little, straightened his posture and put his arms behind him.
His expression was... strange. A mixture of various sensations.
"Stay at Langley long enough, it makes you it's own. I'm no exception." He replied, shrugging and nodding slightly.
But V knew... that was a load of crap.
"It seems... I'm in a really nice room." V said, taking a quick look around and focusing his eyes on the window. There were some birds in the tree ahead, birds that he allowed himself to watch for a few moments.
"Well... we wanted you to be comfortable. The view is even better, the garden is a sight for sore eyes. And I think you've noticed the birds, it's not something you're used to. I'm not used to it myself." He answered, genuinely, somewhat curiously for V.
"I didn't think you'd... come here. That guy... at the VA, Weiss, or something, said you... didn't have time. New job... new life..." V said, slowly shifting on the bed, trying to get his body used to the movements again. Or, perhaps, trying to get used to his body again.
"Ah... yes... there was no need for me to be there at the time. The plan was to visit you after the surgery, and well, here I am." Reed said, walking slowly to the front of the bed while V, in turn, made slow and somewhat awkward movements to sit up.
Reed just stared at him. He seemed to be improving very quickly, which was great.
"And how... is life? How are you with all this change?" V asked, and Reed bowed his head slightly, bringing a hand to his chin.
"Training recruits, busy with paperwork... nothing much. I'd even say things are... quiet." Reed said, and V smiled slightly. It was noticeable.
"I'll tell you, it's not really your style." V said, and Reed snorted, something that sounded almost like a smile.
"It's a bit slower, but I'll tell you, I kind of like it. Besides, I couldn't take any more work in the field, not anymore." Reed replied.
"... I kind of... need to ask... And how's So Mi?" V grunted lightly as he leaned back against the headboard, resting his arm on his leg for a few moments.
"I... I'm not allowed to know that. She's alive and well, as far as I know." Reed replied, and V sighed slightly, already a little tired of it.
There was something wrong, and avoiding it could only make things worse later.
"Well... you showing up here in person... I take it that it's not good news." He said, putting his two hands around his leg and slowly lifting it. Most of his body was still numb. "So, the surgery was a failure?"
Reed shook his head.
"It's not that simple... it almost never is. The doctors saved your life, you're alive and healthy. However, it was a deeply invasive procedure on your nervous system, and there are... consequences." Reed said the last sentence with a sigh, running his right hand through his hair as he took a few slow steps closer.
V crawled a little further back, straightening his posture, and watched out of the corner of his eye as Reed sat down next to him. The man always had a serious expression, but that one... was different. He'd say it didn't really suit the man.
"You... ahm... your body can't handle most implants anymore, chrome. Your brain can handle your personal link and simple coprocessors. But any combat implant could kill you." Reed said, not always looking him in the eye as he told him the bad news.
V just remained silent, knowing exactly what that meant. He lowered his head slightly, now staring at his legs with a faraway look in his eyes.
"I'm sorry, V. But your life as it was before is over." Reed said, resting his hand on his knee.
V shook his head a little, and a mocking laugh escaped his lips. Well, that... hurt more than he thought it would. Perhaps because he had never stopped to think about it before. Stopped to think about what he would do if he could no longer be a mercenary. Fuck, that was pretty much all he knew.
But maybe it wasn't so... bad. He was alive, he'd gotten what he wanted... he should be grateful to be there, despite the high price to pay.
V lifted his gaze to Reed, and that's when a cold sensation ran through his chest. He knew that look bitterly well.
"... I feel like... there's more out there." V said without much enthusiasm, trying to prepare himself for what was to come after the initial shock.
"... You've always been pretty perceptive, haven't you?" Reed asked rhetorically, placing both hands in front of his body as he moved a little closer to V. "You... were blacked out for two years. It's two thousand and seventy-nine."
V blinked... once, twice... he opened his mouth but no sound came from his throat, his voice seemed stuck. The cold sensation he felt in his chest became even stronger, more intense, and he felt his world spinning.
He closed his mouth, gritted his teeth and swallowed the sensation... he felt as if he was about to throw up.
Two years... two fucking years!
V took a deep breath, clenching his hand into a fist for a few brief moments.
"Two years, huh... do we have flying cars yet?" He said after a few moments, raising his head and looking at Reed, who had his eyes slightly wide and his eyebrows arched.
"A joke? Shit, I'm impressed." V let out a sniffle, trying very hard to ignore those sensations, those feelings...
"It wouldn't change anything to be irritated by reality... it's easier to accept." V said, and Reed shook his head briefly.
It was a lie, he was frustrated, scared, anxious, more disoriented than before. His mind was a mess and his heart was racing.
What had happened in that time? What about Judy? She said she'd call before she left town after that day on the dock. And what about Takemura? He hated Arasaka, it was a den of parasites, but Goro didn't seem to be quite the same as the others.
Fuck... what about Panam?
"I wish I could help you, V... but I can't." Reed said, pulling V out of his thoughts.
"I... need..." V tried to say, but the words refused to come out of his mouth. He just tried to get up, ignoring the numbness he felt throughout his body. He put his feet on the ground and stood up, almost falling in the process, but was supported by Reed, who helped him walk to the window.
"We tried everything, V. Seriously... but nothing could reverse your condition. The damage was too severe." Reed said, and V gasped a few times as he leaned on the window, grateful to be able to feel the wind gently hit his face, blinking a few times because of the light, but gazing at the beautiful scenery as he corroded inside.
"What... happened to my implants?" V asked, catching a glimpse of Reed leaning on the window next to him.
"Your implants were deactivated. Your survival depended on it." Reed explained, and V swallowed some saliva, lowering his gaze to the ground.
"... Fuck... Reed... my stuff..." He whispered to himself, and Reed put his hands in front of his body, thinking about what to say.
"Look, V... your body isn't going to go back to the way it was. Now... you should start thinking about what you're going to do. You don't plan on going back to NC, do you?" Reed asked, even though deep down he didn't really want to, after all, V had just woken up.
It was a lot to process.
"And as much as... I know it's a lot to take in, I have to say. We thank you for everything you've done, the president even thought about coming in person. You can start a new life, a new career, here." Reed said, and V gasped with a shaky voice, his chest almost bursting with anxiety.
"Reed... wait... take it easy..." V said, leaning on the wall as he walked slowly towards a nearby chair.
Reed followed close behind, letting him move on his own but watching out for any slip-ups.
"I understand, V. And I don't want you to think I'm forcing you into anything, I just want you to know from the start that you have options. Take your time getting used to it, to this new reality." Reed said, leaving a small card on the table.
V stared at the card for a few moments, before resting his arms on the table and staring into empty space with a faraway look in his eyes.
"Reed... I appreciate the sympathy, I really do. But you don't want me here, and I don't say that as if I'm judging you or want to make you feel bad, it's the truth. I really don't want to stay here. You don't have to pretend to care, please." V said genuinely, closing his eyes for a moment, and Reed put his hands on his waist, a little thoughtful but understanding.
"Part of that is true. But still, V, it remains an option. After everything, I feel you deserve it."
Or maybe you feel you have some responsibility. V thought, but remained quiet.
"... I'll think about it, but for now, my destiny is NC. I have people there, Reed. People who thought I'd be gone for a month at most, not two fucking years." V said, leaning forward slightly and putting his hand over his eyes.
"Of course... it's up to you. When you're ready, call the nurse." Reed said, and V resisted the urge to look at him as he heard footsteps approaching the bed.
Reed pulled something out from under the bed, and V looked curiously at the box he was holding.
"Look... over the last few years... I've thought about a lot of things, not just the mission, no, but my life in general, my decisions. It's not much, but I've managed to, uh, keep some of your things. Most of it is the stuff you were carrying when you came here." Reed said, leaving the box on the table in front of V, who stared at it with fear in his eyes.
Reed noticed, his hands trembling, and decided to take a step or two back. He needed some time.
"Well, I have to go... you know where to find me, V." Reed said, turning without waiting for an answer and walking towards the door.
"... Reed." V called out before leaving, to Reed's misfortune. He stopped in front of the door, but didn't turn around immediately.
"Thanks." V said, and the man turned slowly, keeping his eyes on the floor with a distant expression.
"Don't thank me, V. You have nothing to thank me for." It was a lie, but V knew what he was getting at. Maybe it was for the best.
"This whole thing... did we do the right thing? Could we have done it differently?" He asked, and only then did Reed look at him again.
"You know what? I've asked myself that question several times over the years. And I've come to the conclusion that it's better not to try to answer it. I advise you to do the same." Reed said, ending the conversation, and walking through the door, disappearing down the corridor.
V stood there, alone with his own thoughts, digesting it all, trying to get used to it, trying to feel something other than that cold sensation in his chest.
He had no idea what to make of the situation, and perhaps he would follow Reed's advice and not try to answer those questions in his mind.
Sighing, V pulled the box towards him and opened it. The first thing he saw was the gun he had been using that day. Johnny's gun.
He picked it up and looked at it with heavy eyes. It may have been years since he had last touched that gun, but for him, it had been the day before. However, it felt different from what he remembered, very different. Almost as if it were another gun.
Johnny's gun was a bit heavy, had a hell of a kick and was even a bit slow in terms of fire rate, but it was a powerful weapon. And just like most of the guns he had, he gave it a little tweak here and there, focusing more on damage. There was no point in trying to change anything other than that.
The other item in the box was his phone. He wasn't really in the mood to turn it on at the moment, so he just put it aside for a few moments.
The necklace Misty had given him, with the bullet DeShawn had used to kill him. Damn, even that didn't seem so long ago.
Finally, the last item was the replica of Samurai's jacket. V picked it up carefully and held it up in front of him. He remembered that it had torn at some point during the madness of that day. The gunfire, the rush, the explosions... but apparently Reed had taken care of that, because there was no sign of the tear.
He swallowed some saliva, the logo on the jacket reminded him of Johnny, of the empty hole he now felt. Strange, he'd never thought he'd feel like crying at the thought of the crazy Silverhand, but there he was, his eyes watering.
It was as if a part of him had been torn away. Well, that was kind of the case, and it only took two years for him to finally feel it.
Shaking his head, V left his jacket on the table, next to his necklace, and picked up his phone.
Lots of messages, lots of calls... these were the first things he saw after so long. Suddenly, he felt the urge to vomit.
At the top of the list was Judy. She had called, as she had said, and sent a few messages. Several, in fact, it just took him a little longer to take notice.
She asked him if he was all right, and then, even though he didn't reply, she called him out, even saying that she was getting worried about him. Twenty-one calls.
He swallowed down the urge to vomit and stared at his phone for a few moments. He felt enormous guilt about it, and he really wanted to contact the woman again, to contact all his friends, in fact. However, the first number he called was Panam's.
He and the woman had been through a lot together. And he had no idea how she was doing. He said a month, and he knew how impulsive the woman could be. But he also knew how loyal she was, and it showed in her messages.
From the first month to a year later, she sent him messages. Most of them asking, almost begging he felt, for him to call back, send a message, anything.
He could feel her frustration through the phone, and had to lean back in his chair for a few moments.
The Aldecaldos... they left NC, well, at least they planned to, and she wanted to know if he wanted her to stay. V felt a lump forming in his throat as he read the messages. The anger she must have felt at not getting a reply, the frustration at sending an apologetic message, the desperation at begging him to send a sign of life, and the sadness at her continuing to get no reply even after almost a year of nothing.
Fifty-five calls... he'd say that was more calls than he'd received in his entire life, apart from when it was related to his contracts, of course.
He pressed to call her, even though he had no idea exactly what to say, no idea how she would react, no idea at all, just going on impulse.
The phone rang, and with each ring he felt more anxious, his hands were cold, as was his sweat, and he felt lost.
However, to his frustration, and even a little relief, the woman didn't answer.
"You've reached Panam Palmer. We're sorry, the subscriber is currently out of our service area. Please leave a message, or try again later." He let out a breath he didn't even realize he was holding.
Well, it wasn't surprising, life as a nomad wasn't easy, she was probably busy with something else, probably family-related. He understood, and frankly, he thought it was for the best for the time being. He didn't feel at all ready to talk to her, especially not after what he'd read.
He went back to Judy's contact, and without waiting long, he pressed the call button, getting up and walking over to the window as he did so.
The phone rang a few times until the girl appeared on his screen. She looked different, as was to be expected. Her hair was longer, her face perhaps a little more mature. She was wearing some casual clothes and looked like a totally different person.
"No fucking way." Those were the first words she said, and V couldn't hold back the small smile that appeared on the side of his mouth.
"Hey, uh... Judy." He said, a little hesitantly, not really knowing how to start that conversation.
"Holy shit, V! How are you, choom?! Where have you been?" She asked, apparently excited to see him again.
Oh, she had no idea how excited he was to see her again. Of course, for him, it hadn't been that long since he'd last seen her, but at that moment, he needed a familiar face.
"I... I've been better. I'm in an NUS clinic. I had a... surgery. It's a long story." He said, leaning on the window and watching some people walking quietly through the garden.
"Fuck, and apparently it was a long one. I haven't seen you in a while, pal." She said, and he snorted.
"Tell me about it. I spent most of that time in a coma. I woke up... today, actually." He said, noticing the change in the woman's expression.
"Fuck, V... I'm so sorry. I thought I'd never see you again." He shook his head.
"You're not the only one. I should be dead. But the good news is that I finally got that bioship out." V said, and Judy arched both eyebrows.
"Really? So Silverhand's gone?!"
"Forever and ever." Judy smiled, sitting down on what looked like a sofa.
"Fuck, it's great to know that some stories have a happy fucking ending." She said, and V closed his eyes briefly.
That ending was what he was looking for, not exactly, but he got what he wanted. The problem was that it didn't feel like a happy ending.
"Well, dealing with a few setbacks, but I got what I wanted. I just have no idea where to go from here."
"You'll find a way. People like you always find a way in life." Judy said, and V gasped softly, ducking his head slightly. He had always been very perceptive, which was a certain advantage in his work as a mercenary. He knew when things were deeper than they seemed.
"Are you... angry with me for disappearing like that?" He asked/stated, and Judy sighed a little, looking down at the floor, a little thoughtful.
"Nah... I mean, for a while, yes. But you're not the type to disappear just like that, and considering what you were doing, and your situation, I ended up thinking the worst. Good to know I was wrong." She smiled a little. "Now, things... have changed. I'm far away from NC. Pittsburgh. And I'm married. If you stop by, see me for a beer." She said in a friendly way, and V smiled back.
However, he couldn't ignore that strange feeling in his chest. Then again, he had always been very perceptive, and even though he had woken up from a long coma, his instincts were still warning him.
"... Who knows, one day. By the way, congratulations on the marriage, probably a little later than I wanted, but..." They laughed a little, and V sighed with some regret. "See you, Judy. I hope we'll see each other again one day."
"Me too, V. Take care. Good luck." She said, and he stared at the connection.
Another sigh escaped his lips. Wow, he'd missed out on so much. Judy? Married? Honestly, that thought had never even crossed his mind.
But he was glad she was okay. And despite the strange feeling, he felt happy for her.
However, that feeling only got worse when he called the next few people. He had become good friends with Kerry, although he had noticed the way he looked at him on one occasion or another, nothing crossed the line of friendship. He knew he could count on Kerry, and he hoped Kerry thought the same.
However, the Kerry of now didn't remind him much of the Kerry he had known. He had always cared about money, that was obvious, but he was so... different.
Maybe he was too hopeful. Maybe he'd gotten the wrong impression, but he really had imagined that Kerry would be by his side, accompanying him at that moment, or at least making time for them in the near future.
What he got, however, was a brief nostalgic conversation, a few rude and cold interruptions as he opened up, and an offer of eddies.
Well, maybe he was just feeling... sensitive? After all, it had been two years, he didn't expect them to have stopped their lives because of that. But he hadn't expected that either... lack of consideration, perhaps?
He shook his head. He was certainly feeling sensitive, being more dramatic than he wanted to be.
But again, the strange feeling in his chest only increased when he called River. He was a strong-willed cop with a strong sense of justice, but the man he spoke to was only a shadow of his former self.
Although it was brief, it was enough to realize that the River he had known was gone. Especially after he simply ended the call after a few words of conversation.
Well, to be fair to them, it didn't make sense to feel that way. They'd only known him for how long? A few months? It made sense that they had moved on.
Still, he felt... so... fucking... even he couldn't explain it. He just hoped it would pass soon.
And well, for a few moments, it did.
"Fuck... I admit I turned over a glass or two at your symbolic funeral." Vikor said, a broad smile on his face. His favorite NC ripperdoc. Apparently, not much had changed, and he was internally grateful for that.
"Well then, let's have a glass or two in my... what is it, resurrection?" V asked amusedly, and Vik laughed lightly, nodding his head, apparently excited.
"Oh, absolutely. But how, and more importantly, why?" Vik asked, and V rested his chin on his hand, feeling a sudden urge to smoke.
Which was strange, he didn't smoke. Maybe there were still some remnants of Johnny in him.
"So... this netrunner I met got me involved in this FIA op. They promised surgery, a cure, using the runner's tech, in exchange." He licked his lips, remembering So Mi. Had he made the right choice? Well, of course, he was alive because of it, but... So Mi was probably pretty pissed with him, wherever she was at the moment.
And maybe she had no right to be, since she had lied to him. But again, perhaps, in equal measure, he shouldn't hold it against her.
"And it worked. I'm alive, after two years in a coma." He explained, and Vik seemed to lean on the table.
"Damn... that's a big chunk of life right there. But it's great to see you again, V. Come by when you get the chance. Do you want me to send someone to pick you up?" Vik offered, and V entertained the thought of how exactly he would do that.
That's when he remembered Delamain. Damn, could he still be out there? Maybe someone had already picked him up, or he was abandoned somewhere.
Nah, Delamain was an intelligent AI.
"No need, I've already prepared that. It's good to know that at least you're still here for me, Vik." V said.
"Always, kid. But what do you mean?" Vik asked, and V shifted a little uncomfortably.
"Well... it seems that not all my relationships have passed the test of time." He explained, sounding as natural as possible. Now that he thought about it, it was only natural.
"People move on, V. But some, they end up coming back." Vik said, and V snorted a laugh.
"Tell me about it. Well, I'll be on my way soon, Vik. Are you still in the same place?" Again, Vik gave a broad smile and nodded.
"Yes, you know the address. I'll be waiting for you." Vik said, before they ended the call.
The small smile remained on V's lips. A familiar face answered and hugged him in return, and fucking hell, that brief conversation was good.
Fuck, in his mind it had only been a few days since he'd gone to Vik's clinic for some repairs.
His eyes went to his cell phone again, and he looked once more at Panam's name on the screen. Although some of the conversations hadn't been great, he felt a little more prepared now.
He had certainly hurt her, and two years was too long. She must have moved on by now, but well, he hadn't. He still felt that passion that had grown so fervent during their time together.
But that was okay, all he wanted was to hear her voice, to know how she was, to see her. If they never spoke again after that, well, so be it. It wasn't as if he expected her to drop everything and come back to him after so long.
More confident, although still anxious, he calls her once more.
"You've reached Panam Palmer. We're sorry, the subscriber is currently out of our service area. Please leave a message, or try again later." He let out a slightly disappointed sigh, but well, he was kind of expecting it.
"Hey, ahm... Panam. Guess who's back from... an unwanted vacation? How long, huh? I... I know you've wondered where I've been... a lot, even. More than I care to admit. And I wanted to say that I'm sorry. It wasn't in the plans to spend all that time. A month was all I expected to be back in the city after the surgery." He began, still wondering how to proceed.
Well, it was definitely easier via voice mail than talking to the woman directly, but at the same time, it was more frustrating.
"The surgery was... let's say, quite invasive. I'd just woken up from a coma. In fact, I woke up just before I called you earlier. I'm not in the best of conditions, but... I'll live." He sighed a little. That... was harder than it sounded. "For me... fuck, it seems like yesterday we were playing pool in my apartment. I don't even know what to say apart from I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the long wait, for not being there." He swallowed some saliva, wondering what could be done? Well, he already knew the answer.
Nothing, just wait and pray that she understood.
"I wanted... I really wanted to see you. That would be great. I wanted to see the others too... Mitch, Carol... anyway, I hope... that we can talk soon. See you then." He finished the message and put his cell phone down, placing it back on the table.
Starting life again... well, he was no stranger to it, but he felt that his options had been drastically reduced. No more chrome, no more implants, no more mercenary... just an ordinary life.
Just a fucking ordinary life! A life he didn't know what it was like and, frankly, wasn't really looking forward to finding out any time soon.
He grew up on the streets, learned to fight at an early age. What the fuck was he supposed to do when the only thing he knew how to do in life was ripped away from him? Sit on a goddamn balcony and watch the fucking sunset?
He shook his head, betraying the words he'd said to Reed a short while ago. There was no point in getting angry at reality.
Bullshit
The journey to NC was... full of thoughts and information. It took a while before he was taken out of that clinic, and in that time, he decided to see more of the world. Technology was advancing in a frightening way, but it didn't seem that many things he knew had changed.
Well, Kerry was more famous than ever now that he was singing with Us Cracks. His songs were on almost everything.
Arasaka was crashing out of NC, which was to be expected after learning that Hanako had died and Yorinobu had gone away. Everyone knew his nature now, and Arasaka no longer had that much power, at least not there.
It made no difference, other companies would take its place in no time.
However, it made him think of Takemura. He hadn't heard anything about him on the news, and knowing that Hanako had died, he couldn't help thinking that his fate had turned out to be bitter.
He hoped to see him again one day.
Waiting for him in NC was Delamain. As he had thought, that AI was pretty clever, being alone for all that time and still remaining in good condition. Which made him wonder about the real Delamain. Or rather, the "father" Delamain, or something like that. It was still a bit confusing for him.
But, well, it was great to know that he had "someone" else with him, even if it was an AI.
But even better was finally meeting Vik. Damn, he was a sight for sore eyes. In terms of appearance, he's hardly changed at all. A bit older, of course, with a few new tattoos, but otherwise he was the same.
They approached each other with broad smiles on their faces, and greeted each other with a firm handshake.
"V... long time no see." He said, his voice slightly slurred, carried by a certain relief. His eyes were still hidden by those glasses.
"It depends on your point of view. For me, a few days." V replied, and Vik ducked his head slightly, letting out a short laugh.
"Damn... this is turning into a habit. You, coming back from the dead." V just waved his hand.
"Let that be the last time. I don't think I'll be able to come back if it happens again."
"Fuck... I really thought I'd never see you again." Vik said, and V raised his whisky bottle towards the man.
"Come on, Vik. You're going to make me cry." He said, and Vik took the bottle from his hands.
"And what would be the problem?" He asked, looking at the bottle of booze. A glint of nostalgia flashed in his eyes. V would have noticed if it hadn't been for his glasses. He never understood why he wore sunglasses there. "They have this rule. No drinking in the clinic..."
He looked at the bottle for a few more moments, until he took a step or two to the side without looking away.
"Wooo... what a treat. It's the same one Jackie and I once drank. Championship for the middleweight title." Vik said, turning around with a nostalgic smile. "Malone v Kano. I remember it like it was yesterday."
"Ah, yes... so many memories. That was the first one I drank with Jackie." V said, just as nostalgic. Damn, time has passed so... quickly. And so slowly at the same time. If he tried hard enough, he could still hear Jackie next to him.
"Good times... things have changed so much, there's no denying it. Jackie's gone... and for a while, so were you." Vik said, and V nodded, agreeing with him.
"Just like Misty's store. What happened here?" V asked, watching Vik place the bottle in a hidden spot.
The man turned and pointed to the chair. V stared at him for a few moments with an arched eyebrow.
"Let's scan your body. You didn't give many details when I asked you earlier. Relax, it's just a quick thing." Vik said, and V did so, without much hope, of course. His system was permanently damaged, there was no way to reverse it.
"Now, to answer your question. Misty moved out recently. She comes here sometimes, to pick up some of her things. But she comes less and less now." He said, watching V's neural interface appear on the screen.
"But tell me, what's it like being back in the world of the living?" Vik asked as he pulled his chair towards the screen.
"What can I say? The world, life has moved on, it didn't wait for me. You're all I have, Vik." V said, trying to settle into his chair as Vik looked at him with sympathetic, even understanding eyes.
"I understand what you're getting at. Get to my age and maybe you'll realize that you have nothing in common with the people you care about." Vik said, observing the information that appeared in front of him.
"... That's not the only change. The guy up front said I had to be quick, so I'll spare you the details, but... Vik, Zetatech?" was all he asked, and Vik sighed with a certain regret. He didn't seem very happy about it either. To tell the truth, Vik looked fed up, unhappy.
"The pressure was great, V. Anonymous threats, again and again. I ran out of options, and it got to the point where I just got tired. The pressure is strong, V, so strong that I was forced to make a choice." He said, leaning his torso slightly forward and resting his arms on his legs as he waited for the results to load.
"I imagine Misty didn't like that change very much. That must be why she moved, right?" V asked.
"Part of the reason, yes. She stopped feeling comfortable here, which isn't surprising. She's said a lot, and I miss her. I wish her the best." Vik said, and they were both silent for a few moments.
Well, apparently he wasn't the only one still getting used to such changes, he wasn't the only one feeling the weight of things and missing what once was.
He just didn't know if it was a good thing.
"Well, your core looks normal, good, even." Vik said. "Let's take a look at your motor cortex." Vik said, and again silence fell between them.
V didn't have much to say about it. His hopes were down, he just accepted it. And, apparently, now Vik would have to accept it too.
"... Hm..." He grunted after a few moments. "I've never seen anything like it... your cortex seems to have been muted by the implant signals." Vik only said what V already knew, and had now confirmed.
The former mercenary smiled as he listened to Vik think of some alternatives, but they wouldn't make any difference, he was just grateful for his friend's willingness.
"I... I don't think I can do anything. I'm sorry, V." Vik said, and V just waved his hand.
"Don't worry about it. At this point, I think I've accepted my new reality." He said, unable to contain the acidity in his words. Deep down, he still hadn't accepted it.
"Fucking hell... I wish I knew how to help you, kid. But what I can tell you is that, in time, you'll realize that it's not so bad." Vik said.
"What? Losing one of the only things that made sense in my life?" V asked, still using acidic words, mentally regretting it. He ended up taking it out on Vik for what he had nothing to do with.
"No, settle down, retire. A normal life may seem strange to you now, but in a few months' time, maybe you'll see it differently." Vik said, and V stared at the floor for a few moments, thoughtful.
Until he sighed in defeat.
"Well, I'll try to believe that for now." V said, and before he could say anything else, the door to the place was opened, and they both turned to the woman who was approaching.
"Vektor, come on, quickly. I've had some problems and I need surgery." The woman said, approaching rather quickly, until her eyes focused on V. "Ah, you're busy, I see?"
She asked, and Vik moved to answer, but V was quicker.
"No, no, I was just leaving." V said, turning to Vik shortly afterwards. "Talk to you, pal." V said, holding out his hand to Vik, who shook it with a rather heavy expression on his face.
"I'm sorry, V. My shift ends in three hours, if you want to come back later, I'll be here." Vik said, and V shook her head.
"You know, I think I'll do just that." That was all he said, before turning and walking out of there.
He hated that shit. He hated what Misty's old store had become, he hated that the fucking corps had taken over the place and tied Vik up by the arms and legs. But what could he do? He was practically useless.
Shaking his head, V climbed the stairs and walked to the elevator.
The elevator doors closed, and he closed his eyes as he waited inside. Like it or not, he would have to accept his new life, he would have to do something now.
Something beyond what he knew. And he was fucking scared of it.
He even considered Reed's proposal, but to be honest with himself, he wasn't that desperate. The offer was good, yes, but it wasn't for him, and even if it was more difficult, he'd rather do things his way.
Taking a few deep breaths, he shook his head and stepped out of the elevator as the doors opened. He was young, he still had a lot of time... the problem was that he remembered that piece of shit DeShawn's question, and realized that the fatty had a point at the time.
Would you rather be a nobody and die of old age, or go all out to dictate history and not even make it to your thirties?
If he could answer right now, at this very moment, he'd say he'd rather not make it to his thirties.
As Johnny had said, the worst thing you could do to a person was to remove their identity. And he felt that part of his identity had been ripped away along with his ambition.
Gritting his teeth, he climbed the stairs and opened the door to the roof terrace. Well, fuck his depressive thoughts, fuck his anger at the fucking world and fucking fate, if such a thing really existed.
He wasn't going to sit around and do nothing. The way he saw it, he'd lost a lot in exchange for a free life. Many would say it was a "second chance", and maybe it was, but a quiet, peaceful life wasn't for him.
His eyes ran across the roof. The chairs that once occupied the area were no longer there, and he approached the edge of the building with slow steps. He remembered the conversation he'd had with Johnny there, he remembered the conversation he'd had with him afterwards.
Night City had taken from him two of his best friends, taken his life as he knew it, robbed him of everything. Perhaps the best idea at the moment was to leave that city, to look for something elsewhere.
But he still had things to sort out there.
Grunting slightly as he sat on the edge of the building, he leaned his arms behind his back and looked out over the city's tall buildings.
He had been evicted from his apartment, his things had probably been auctioned off or sold. And it couldn't stay that way.
Jackie's guns and motorcycle...
Johnny's car...
Panam's rifle...
Scorpion's motorcycle...
He wanted to get these things back. Only then would he think about a "fresh start", but for now, he had to stay in the past a little longer, tie up some loose ends.
He could ask for some favors, some people owed him. He could sort out some unfinished business, and the first thing he would do after a few calls would be to go and visit Mama Welles... he felt she deserved it.