The Journal of Renault, Bishop of Valor

Chapter 16

My life has taken a turn for the absolute worst sadly. Shit between my roommates and I, working multiple jobs, and other ridiculous nonsense have kept me from writing and most other activities. It's been so long since the last chapter in fact that I completely forgot where I was going from here, so I apologize if what I'm about to write makes absolutely zero sense.

I'm trying as hard as humanly possible to make out time to write and just enjoy myself, but it seems to get harder and harder by the day. I think the best way for me to fix this problem for the time being is to get (or attempt to get) a new chapter/story out at least once a month and then go from there. For now, here's chapter 16 of this series.

Following my bath, I clothed myself in the robes given to me: a white gown with violet and bronze edges and a violet cape to match. In my head I pondered over this garment and how it suited me rather well, but shook my head as to not forget why I was here in the first place. I proceeded into the main chamber where the Archsage sat. He was a man who defied the test of time, a man whose age, like mine, I could not exactly pinpoint. He must have looked at least a century old given the long snow white hair and matching beard, his skin wrinkled and sullen to the point where even the bone was exhausted from carrying its weight. This was the Archsage Athos, and yet it was hard to believe that such an experienced and powerful sage could also look so…fragile. My eyes were suddenly distracted by the sudden appearance of the man and woman from earlier, both of whom took either side of the Archsage as he stood up from his seat and proceeded down the marble stairs. I knelt before him like I was praying to Saint Elimine, but he gestured to me to rise. "I am flattered by your generosity, but you need not bow before me," he said in a hoarse voice.

"Forgive me Archsage," I replied, stumbling over my words uncharacteristically, "I was-"

"Fear not, holy priest. You need not apologize." He took a deep breath as he finally made it down the last step, standing before me and staring into my eyes with an unfettered gaze. I didn't know whether to feel intimidated or comforted by his presence. Forgive me Saint Elimine, but he truly had the aura of someone who was like a god, despite being mortal like myself. "Now then," he continued, "you wished to speak with me?"

"Yes Archsage. I-" I paused as I collected my thoughts carefully, choosing my next words with the utmost scrutiny. These next few words that would come out of my mouth would hopefully allow me to gain the answers to the questions I've asked myself since I left the church so long ago. The Archsage's answer would define my path going forward, like a glimpse into a crystal ball. I exhaled, inhaled again, and spoke. "I am seeking the whereabouts of the sorcerer Nergal. It is imperative that I find him and make him pay for what he has done to my dear friend. What he did to me, to my friend, has done more damage to me and my life than I could ever possibly imagine, and I want to-"

Before I could finish, the Archsage's face changed into a scowl as he suddenly turned his back and proceeded slowly back up the marble steps. I was taken aback by the response and begun to theorize what I had said to warrant such a reaction. Perhaps I said too much. Perhaps I said the wrong thing. I wasn't sure, but as the Archsage made it to the 13th step, he paused and gave an answer: "I cannot give what you ask. Nor will I give it to you if I could."

"Archsage…"

"You seek out one of the most powerful sorcerers in Elibe, a man capable of dark magic beyond your comprehension, someone with power beyond the abilities of mankind, all for what? Revenge? And what should happen in the minute chance you succeed?"

I did not answer.

"Nergal is a force beyond your faith, beyond your prowess. Alone, you stand no chance against him."

"Alone, perhaps. But with your help-"
"No," he boomed, his voice carrying throughout the chamber. For a moment, there was no sound save for the sound of running water. It was as if the world stood motionless at that moment. Not a breath was taken, nor an eye blinked. Then, as the Archsage continued up the steps, time resumed, and suddenly everything that had just occurred hit me with the force of a lightning bolt. "Holy priest, this is not a battle you can win. No matter your strength, or that of your allies, this fight is beyond you. Return to your church, continue your service to the gods, cleanse this from your mind and live your life in peace. That is my order to you.``

"Archsage, you can't possibly-"

"Go!" His voice boomed throughout the chamber again, sending ripples through the water. "You may rest here before you make your journey home, but I will say nothing more to you on the matter."

All I could do in the moment was nod silently and bow before leaving the chamber, utterly disappointed.

As I sat in a room at the local inn, my stomach churned, my heart sunk, and my skin grew cold and clammy. After all this time, after all the suffering I had been through, times I've been stabbed in the back by people I thought I could trust, it was all for nothing. I could still hear the Archsage's words echoing through my head, repeating itself over and over again: "No matter your strength, or that of your allies, this fight is beyond you." Out of nowhere, I felt my arm rise suddenly and then…

CRACK!

I felt a sharp pain in my hand as I looked up, finding that I had punched the mirror in front of me, impaling my hand with small shards of glass. I watched the blood slowly trickle from the cuts on my hand, fighting back emotion as my breath became shaky, tears slowly running down my cheek. What's going on with me, I thought. What am I doing? It's as if my body is acting on its own. Then again, I expected this reaction. After all I've been through, to be told that my expedition was all in vain and that I had no power to stand up to Nergal felt like an arrow- no, ten arrows- through my heart. At that moment I felt as powerless as a newborn child, but why? Why did I feel this way? Was it normal to feel this much anger over something out of my control?

Suddenly, I heard a knock at my door. I frantically covered my wounded hand with cloth and opened the door slowly. I was surprised by who was standing in front of me. It was the bandit that rescued me from the Nabata Desert. "You…" I whispered. "You're-"

"Garret, your holiness. Forgive me for my intrusion," he answered. For someone so young and ruthless, he had good manners.

"So you're Garret…" I pondered. Was this truly the person Marquess Uther spoke of, the one who was supposed to lead me to the Archsage? No, surely it couldn't be. He's only a kid, but yet the more I look at him the more dazed and confused I get. He was very muscular for someone his age, bald and riddled with scars too. But perhaps it would be wrong of me to judge on appearances. I've already done enough of that. "How did you know I would be here?"

"I asked the locals. Took a bit of convincing that I'm not here to kill them but I managed. I understand you were trying to find the Archsage. Is that correct?"

"Yes."

"And?"

I decided not to withhold anything from him. I told him what had happened in the chamber, what I told Athos and his reaction as well. I layed out every detail of what my plan was with Nergal, how I was planning to avenge my fallen friend. Garret stood there in absolute silence, absorbing every facet of the conversation as I revealed it to him, only nodding and sighing at certain details.

"My apologies, your holiness," he finally said, "but the Archsage has a point. This man, Nergal…he's beyond your prowess."

"I refuse to sit by while he's still out there. I must find him and avenge my friend, even if it costs me my life."

"With all due respect, that is quite possibly the most hairbrained sentence I've ever heard coming from someone of your profession."

Both Garret and I turned towards the door. Standing there was the silver-haired man from the temple, although the lady that accompanied him was not present. I stood in silence, unable to find the right words to say.

"The Archsage is a very wise individual, priest," he continued. "He has lived far longer than any man here in Elibe. He once coexisted with the dragonkin of old, even fought against them in the Scouring. He was even friends with Nergal at one point and saw what he became. That is knowledge that neither you or I can hope to gain by sheer force."

"Hold on," I interrupted. "You say that the Archsage and Nergal were…friends?"

"At one time, yes. Centuries ago, when man and dragon coexisted in harmony. He once told me the story of how they both came to meet each other. It went something like this…"

And before I knew it, I was listening ever so carefully to his story. The built-up emotion inside me began to fade, and I found myself getting lost in this young man's tale.

Perhaps not my best work so far, but I hope you've enjoyed this new chapter!