Summary: Everyone at Chaldea knew that out of all the Servants Vy was contracted with, she was the closest with Mash. It's because of that closeness that, in spite of the Lostbelts trying to tear out Vy's soul with its cruelty, Mash still knows, deep down, just how kind and determined Vy continues to be.

Note: Inspired by the recent translation of the Lostbelt Crypter manga, specifically one extra chapter that focused on the late Olga-Marie Animusphere, and well. All I can say is my writing muse went with it.

Even in a cruel world, kindness can still persevere. And since Mash was the first Servant in my game that I got to max level and 10/10/10 with all her skills, I wanted to give her a voice in this story. Considering how much darkness Chaldea has at its start, there has to be some light, right?

The theme for this piece is the Synthesia cover of Kyle Landry's piano rendition of Hikari from the first Kingdom Hearts game, posted by MisterMoes on YouTube. I was debating on using Shikisai from FGO itself, but eh, I found Hikari more fitting for this.

Of course, CW for light Epic of Remnant and Cosmos in the Lostbelt Spoilers. Up to the endings of Salem and Lostbelt 1, though.

Please enjoy.

Day 13: Kouhai and Senpai

The first thing Mash Kyrielight had noticed about the 48th Master Candidate Vy was how honest she was. Even when barely staying awake in the hallway she was found in by Fou, the warm smile she had sent Mash's way while introducing herself was something Mash hadn't seen in anyone except for maybe Dr. Roman.

Even when stuck in the aflame Command Room and facing possible death, Vy's smile hadn't changed. The smile was wobby, yes, but it was still warm when she had sat down against the rock holding Mash down, offering her hand.

"I-I'll figure things out when it comes to getting out of here. For now, I can't leave you, Mash." That was what Vy had said back then, when she had taken Mash's hand in hers. "We'll be okay."

Those words could have easily been lies. After all, the ability to know how to lie with a straight face was a fundamental part of every Mage. But when Vy looked at Mash with those brown eyes behind her glasses, doing her best to keep up a brave face in spite of the tears starting to show, Mash felt like she could believe it.

Singularity F was no different. When Mash had taken on Galahad's powers for the first time to save Vy from those skeletons, that very same smile was on Vy's face. Warm, happy, and this time proud.

"Mash, you—" Vy had squished Mash to her in a tight hug that had Mash nearly cry out uncle if not for her new Servant status and the suspicious wet droplets falling onto the shoulder area of her armor. "You are beautiful, strong, and ohmigod, thank you for saving me." After that sentence, Mash could faintly remember Vy sniffling as she tightened the hug. "I-I'm so glad to see you alive and okay."

"A-As a Demi-Servant, I have more strength than an average human, senpai," Mash flubbed in her response, because when had someone ever embraced her before? Especially in the middle of a city that was still on fire? "But I'm glad to see you safe as well." It took a moment for one of Mash's arms to let go of her shield and rest itself against the back of Vy's shoulders, barely brushing her long brown hair in the process. "You were right, though, senpai."

Vy pulled away from the hug back then, wiping her eyes in favor of looking to Mash with a confused face. "A-About what?"

"Back in the Command Room, you said, 'We'll be okay.' And we're both here and okay, senpai!"

Vy had opened her mouth at that statement, gaping for a little bit before reorienting herself and giving Mash that same smile again. "Oh, you, you silly kouhai of mine," she said softly, "what am I going to do with you?"

"D-Did I say something wrong?"

"No no, not at all." Vy shook her head back then, raising both arms to wrap them around Mash's neck and squeeze her in another, albeit shorter, hug, laughing all the while. "Just, thank you for remembering that, beloved kouhai of mine." Mash's heart definitely skipped a beat when Vy had addressed her that way. She didn't have time to act on the feelings it brought up once Vy had pulled away and took on a more serious expression. "For now, let's see if we can find anyone else from Chaldea and get out of this place, okay? Flames are not a good look for the first day on a world-traveling road trip, and I'd like you to at least hike with me for a recreational activity first, Mash."

Another thing Mash found out about her Master very early on and very quickly, was how physically affectionate she was. Those hugs she gave in Singularity F were merely the tip of the iceberg.

"Good morning, Mash!" Vy would say one day, squeezing Mash's shoulders.

"Hello, fluffy and beloved kouhai!" she'd say another day, hugging Mash from behind when Mash was in the middle of reading something. "How are you doing, Mash?"

It was only when Mash asked for the reason why that she first saw Vy cry.

It didn't take the Demon Pillars — heck, it didn't even take a tough battle. All it took was a simple question.

"Senpai?"

"Hm?"

"I-If I could ask, why do you like hugging me so much?"

"Why? Oh…" Vy had frozen over her snack of a Golden Apple slice, the fruit midway to her mouth before she had put it down, and at the time, Vy smiled. What was different about this smile was how lonely it looked, matching her saying, "Well, I do it because I want to. Since my…" Vy had closed her eyes once she had trailed off into thought, sighing wordlessly before ducking her head and letting her hands fall against the black skirt of her Chaldea uniform. "My family isn't exactly around to let me hug them at the moment, Mash. And I like being with you, so I'd like to at least make sure you're still here with hugs, if… if that makes sense."

Mash already could guess something was wrong when Vy had said that, but once the first tear had dropped down onto her stockings, Mash lost any sense of responding. Instead, Mash wordlessly pulled Vy into her own hug, nodding her head just as Vy hid her face into Mash's jacket, wetness starting to spread through the cloth on her shoulder. "I-I'm sorry, Mash, I'm sorry…" Vy's voice cracked. "I-I just miss—"

"D-Don't apologize, senpai. It's okay, it's okay. I'm here."

Mash never thought she'd have to repeat Vy's words from all the way back in that collapsing Command Room. But it was a first that she wouldn't forget. Even if back then, she had an inkling she wouldn't be around much longer.

It took the loss of Dr. Roman and the advent of the Remnant Order coined by Da Vinci that Mash started seeing more of Vy's "dark side", or so Vy had called it once with a laugh. Mash may not have been a Demi-Servant anymore, but that didn't mean her new life didn't allow for some new opportunities.

Shinjuku was the first time during a mission where Mash couldn't physically be there that she saw Vy be sarcastic. She couldn't remember everything Vy had said from the Assassin of Shinjuku interfering with things, not to mention Moriarty, but the way Vy had conducted herself reminded Mash of Jeanne D'Arc Alter in some ways. (Some of her choice words in calling out her enemies were a bit much for Mash, though.) Agartha was left as an unspoken topic, because the events that happened there were something Mash was still trying to process. (It was still hard looking back at the fight with Dahut and remembering how Vy had both broke down and exploded all at once from the threats of rape pointed at her.) Shimosa — well, Mash wasn't able to be there for reasons Chaldea was still trying to understand. All she had of that other world was Fuuma's stories and Vy's recountings of what happened.

Thus, it was really only when Mash was physically together with Vy in Salem that she started having a growing feeling Vy had gone through more than she had let others know about.

Like every other moment, it started off rather normally, with everyone from Chaldea coming around the table for breakfast.

"Muuu…" was the usual noise Vy made when she was conflicted about something, and with what was being served, Mash couldn't blame her.

"Master, you don't have to stare at the gruel if you don't want to eat it," Sanson said patiently, being remarkably kind with his admonishment in spite of the sideways death glare he was sending to Robin Hood for his being the cook that one morning in Randolph Carter's house (much to Robin's chagrin). When looking back, Mash probably shouldn't have trusted Carter so easily, considering he was later found to be Raum, one of the remaining Demon God Pillars, but in essence, hindsight was 20/20. "One of us can take it off your hands."

Regrettably, even back then, Mash could see where Sanson was coming from. As much as Robin Hood tried, the bowls in front of them looked more like mushy rice porridge with far too much water. From a nutritional standpoint, it had only carbohydrates and nothing else. Thus, Mash said, "Senpai, if you want, I could…?"

To everyone's surprise, Mash included, Vy shook her head vigorously, taking her spoon to eat a small mouthful of the gruel. It was obvious by the squinting of her eyes shut past her glasses that the taste was "interesting," (at least, that's what Mash could gleam from their miraculously intact Master-Servant connection) but Vy still swallowed her serving with a visible gulp. "No," she said firmly, putting her spoon back into the soup and opening her eyes. "It's okay. I'll eat it. It'll be a waste of good food if I'm picky now. Not to mention Big Robin cooked it. I don't want to put his efforts to waste."

Mash couldn't miss how Robin Hood, who was hovering over Vy's shoulder from the sink area, turned a light pink from the mention. Mata Hari simply "aww"ed from surprised delight once she caught sight of the Archer's pink ears. Sanson and Medea (really, Circe, back then) both had pinched faces of awkwardness in comparison, but Vy's words were enough to make them start eating too.

"That's a good philosophy. To have. Waste not. Want not." Nezha said in her usual clipped tone, a small smile on her face. "Whoever raised you. Did well."

Vy took another spoonful of gruel, slowly placing it in her mouth before a more thoughtful expression came over her features. "About that…" she started in a smaller, tinier voice around her spoon, shrugging her shoulders, "from my blood, watery porridge isn't much. My parents grew up with less than this for meals, barely able to afford any kind of meat for nourishment or even a soccer ball to play with when growing up. I think Daddy used tin foil balls instead."

For some reason, at that moment, Mash remembered the cold enclosing walls of Chaldea and the books Dr. Roman gave her to learn about the world. She could still recall how, when first hearing Vy say those things, she felt her blood freeze in their veins.

It didn't help how, at that time, Vy's normally warm eyes seemed to glaze over, her glasses a bit foggier-looking as she recounted the tales of her family. "Mommy used to tell me about how she'd buy books second-hand and sell them back to others on the streets just to help Grandma and Grandpa raise everyone else in the family. Grandpa had to sell guns almost every day just to support 9 kids, and Grandma had to reuse old clothes for diapers because there was nothing else. Not to mention Daddy and how he had to leave Vietnam and all of his family behind through a boat when America and the North Vietnamese decided to duke it out. So," Vy let out a small huff through her nose as she shook her head, "I can't afford to be selfish when they lived on worse and survived just to have me."

In hindsight, Mash shouldn't have been surprised at the sensation of her heart sinking to the bottom of her stomach. It didn't make the feeling of her saliva drying up in the back of her throat any less unnerving. "Senpai, that's…"

Robin Hood and Mata Hari's smiles in particular were eerily frozen on their faces.

"…Oh," Nezha concluded simply. Her spoon audibly clattered against the side of her empty gruel bowl. "I am. Sorry. Master."

It was obvious something made Vy unearth this rather touchy subject, since she herself gaped at everyone in the room, all of whom ended up staring back at her in shock. "Uh." Once the words sank into the atmosphere, Vy put down her own spoon and sighed, a wry smile coming up on her face. The sigh itself sounded like a sign of calling Vy herself back to the present day, just to face everyone. "I-I'm sorry, I rambled a bit there. I didn't mean to make the room feel bad or anything, so Nezha, don't apologize. Let's just all eat, okay?"

It was quickly becoming obvious no one shared the sentiment of dropping the subject since before Mash could even move, Mata Hari was already getting up from her seat and wrapping her arms around Vy's head to bring her into a hug. Robin Hood was quick to follow in resting a palm on top of Vy's hair, much to her visible growing confusion, so Mash couldn't help but reach across the table and grab one of Vy's hands. "Senpai," Mash said around the lump in her throat, "you can be selfish sometimes. Especially with us."

"Wh-What's this all about, Mash?" Vy replied, but the small wobble in her voice quickly proved that they were all hitting a sore spot that hadn't been treated for a long time. "I mean—"

"Little sparrow," Robin Hood interrupted gently, patting Vy's head, "Abby's not here. You can drop the tough act whenever you feel like it."

Mash felt her heart break a bit inside at the wide-eyed look Vy gave them all before tears welled up in the corners of her eyes. "Well, g-geez," she said shakily, ducking her head, "was I that obvious?"

"We all could feel it, little one," Mata Hari murmured softly, rubbing Vy's shoulders. "There's no shame in showing weakness."

"I-I get that, but we're still in enemy territory, okay?" Vy still raised a hand to return Mata Hari's hug, blinking furiously to prevent the tears from falling. "The last thing I want is for Abby to see the Ringmaster cry. A-An adult crying in front of a child can have lasting psychological effects if not handled respectfully, y'know."

Mash didn't have to hear Vy elaborate to guess she had gone through that last part herself.

I just hope they're proud of— rang through their bond and Mash gripped Vy's hand tighter.

"…That does not mean you have to hold it in forever," Sanson countered in a quieter voice, reaching over the table to put his hand over Mash's and Vy's all at once. "If you would prefer it, Master, once we return to Chaldea, we all can hear you out on something you want. That is, if you so wish it."

"I-If I did that, I think you'd all be spoiling me," Vy replied with a warmer laugh, closing her eyes and unintentionally letting the first tear drip down her face. Almost immediately, Mata Hari raised one hand from Vy's shoulders to wipe the tear away, Robin Hood still patting Vy's head all the while. Probably because of all the physical attention she was in the center of, it took a moment for Vy to open her mouth again. "Th-Though, I don't see how this whole bit isn't spoiling me, anyways."

"I-It's not spoiling when we want to be with you, Senpai!" Mash blurted out, squeezing Vy's fingers. "We want to be there for you!"

"Also," Nezha interrupted, pushing her empty food bowl away in favor of taking Vy's other hand in hers to squeeze. "Master needs. More attention."

"A-Attention?" Vy's cheeks were slowly flushing pink as red dotted the corners of her eyes from all the tear residue. "Do I really?"

"Yes!" Mash said loudly.

"Yes," Mata Hari agreed, with her arms winding around Vy's shoulders a bit tighter.

With one more headpat, Robin Hood said with a straight face, "Yes." Pretending to think on the subject with a nod of his head, he then added, "Little sparrows deserve headpats."

"H-Headpats?!"

"…Marie would certainly enjoy giving those," Sanson put in thoughtfully, squeezing both Mash and Vy's hands. "We shall provide them since she was unable to come here to do so herself."

"S-Sansoooooon…" Vy whined. Mash was tempted to laugh a bit.

The last nail in the metaphorical coffin was Nezha squeezing Vy's other hand and nodding as if she had achieved enlightenment. "If Master does not. Want to be selfish. We will. Indulge her instead."

"P-Please don't!" Vy was turning red from what Mash was starting to identify as embarrassment. "Wh-What you're doing right now is fine!"

"Not fine enough if you're gonna keep saying things like what happened earlier during future mealtimes," Robin Hood interjected hotly, with Mata Hari nodding in understanding. "So more headpats and hugs it is."

"R-Robiiiiiin…"

"I will hug you every day if it helps, Senpai!"

"N-Not you too, Mash!"

Vy may have been pouting and overall very sulky after that, but the affection had done something. That breakfast ended on a relatively positive note, which was amazing considering what the rest of the Pseudo-Singularity had to offer.

What probably would've made the moment better in hindsight was if the Medea there was actually Chaldea's Medea. Vy might've opened up more had she been present, simply because Medea had been there since Singularity F. Sure, Circe's inclusion was helpful in the end, but back then, it would have been better to have one of Vy's first Heroic Spirits than an enigma witness a moment of "weakness" like that. The silence from "Medea" back then was unnerving, and well. It certainly explained part of Vy's continuing foul mood with Circe after the reveal at least.

What really made Mash decide to stay, in the end, was a simple conversation she remembered taking place after the end of the Russian Lostbelt. In spite of her previous shed tears, in spite of the growing eyebags on her face, Vy had still put on the same smile and pulled Mash into one of her many hugs.

Mash only had a sliver of a second to dispel her Ortinax goggles before it happened. "I'm sorry, Mash," was the sudden whisper brushing her ear. "And thank you for saving me again."

Even when still mostly clothed in her Ortinax armor, Mash couldn't help but hug back out of reflex. "You're welcome, Senpai," she said slowly, rubbing Vy's back through her Winter Chaldean Uniform while trying not to make a face. "But what are you apologizing for?"

Vy had pulled away from the hug from Mash's question, instead pressing her forehead to Mash's in response. Mash could see even through her bangs with the new angle how Vy's eyes were closed and her bottom lip was trembling. "…I'm apologizing for how I couldn't take you to meet my family before all this," Vy whispered softly, her eyebrows furrowing anxiously. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to take you hiking around Zion National Park. I'm sorry I dragged you back into fighting again for me. I'm sorry that I couldn't give you some inner peace. I—" Mash flinched once she noticed the small visible tear budding in the corners of one of Vy's eyes. "I'm sorry I used that one Command Seal on you. I shouldn't have brought your powers back when you finally started living again." Vy took a shaky breath while gripping Mash's shoulders, letting the forehead touch fade in favor of ducking her head. "You deserve to be in a better home than the Shadow Border. You deserved — no, still deserve — a better life, a better place to be. Not… not something like this."

Maybe if someone else was leading you, then—

Mash blinked, her breath hitching in her throat at the thought that flooded her mind from their connection. No, nononono, no, senpai, I—

She couldn't help but do the first thing that came to mind.

Bonk.

"O-OW!" Vy cried out, matching Mash's own squeak from the shared pain (maybe an "ACK!" on her own behalf), because really, headbutts hurt. Still, in spite of said pain, Vy was opening her eyes and looking at Mash again, brown irises wide and in disbelief, but still in focus. "M-Mash?"

"You didn't drag me along, senpai," Mash whispered vehemently, shaking her head. "I asked you to use that Command Spell. I wanted to protect you."

"But, with the Crypters, Team A—" Vy shut her eyes again, the bridge of her nose wrinkling from the stress as her voice cracked. "I-I should've asked everyone back at Chaldea to look into them more. Before all this happened."

Maybe I could've—

"The fault lies with Da Vinci and I, senpai," Mash continued in the same voice, reaching up to grab Vy's shoulders. "We didn't say anything about Team A back during the Incineration of Humanity because you had to shoulder enough already. I don't think any of us would have expected history to be targeted again, especially so soon after Salem and by our own personnel. Don't blame yourself."

Vy shivered. "Mash…"

"Senpai, I wouldn't have chosen to follow you if I didn't trust you," Mash interrupted, before Vy could open her mouth again. "And considering how Kadoc and the others didn't refer to me as a 'someone' in Russia, even with the world the way it is, I know I would still choose you any day."

Vy visibly choked at that point, the tears growing in her eyes to the point of falling and starting to stain the lenses of her glasses. "M-Mash…!"

Mash felt her vision blur a bit too, even through the space left behind by the goggles the Ortinax armor gave her, but she still soldiered on with a warm, "Senpai."

Vy blinked rapidly, raising her head to look at Mash through the falling tears.

"Senpai, thank you for holding my hand and saving me in that fire," Mash said softly, trying to ignore her voice shaking. "Thank you for supporting me and believing in me. I…" Mash gulped down the lump in her throat, squeezing Vy's shoulders one last time. "I love you."

Even if it was in a different context, it was still the same three words Vy had given Mash before they had confronted "Solomon" in the Temple of Time. Even now, Mash wasn't sure if she was using the words correctly. After all, the only humans she truly got to know were those of the Chaldea staff and Vy. It didn't help in how Vy's usage of "I love you" differed so much from the stories Mash read when growing up under Dr. Roman's watchful eye. No sexual intentions, no leading someone on, it was just… love. Vy's version of love was just there. Kind, warm, and so open.

Could this be what having a family is like?

Mash still wasn't quite sure of her feelings for her Master. Or just things in general. Hell, Vy talked a lot about letting Mash meet her family, but all Mash had to go off of in those relations was Vy's recountings of them and the occasional picture. Some of the Servants would've liked to claim there could be something romantic between Master and Servant, but when Vy had hugged Mash tight before that final fight, murmuring those words into Mash's ear, it felt different. Back then, and even now, Mash could at least figure out one thing.

Vy's love was something Mash wanted to protect. Something she wanted to continue cherishing.

"Please believe me, senpai, you didn't drag me in. With the Command Spell you used back in Chaldea, you continued to give me the courage to move forward. And with the new enemy we have now, I want to stay with you. I want to keep fighting with you."

It was the truth. Even in her Winter Chaldean Uniform, Vy was still her senpai. And, oh gosh, she was tearing up again, but she was smiling. "…Oh, you," Vy sniveled finally over a lump of her own in her voice, pushing a stray strand of hair out of her face and back into her ponytail, "Mash, you silly and beloved kouhai of mine, wh-where did you learn to sweet-talk like that?"

"I-I learn from example," Mash fumbled, smiling back while letting Vy's shoulders go. "A-And I meant what I said."

Vy's smile widened just before she reached over with both hands to pull Mash into a tighter hug than before. There was barely any space in-between them as Vy squeezed. "Then—" There was a sniffle. "L-Let me thank you, Mash. For the pep talk and staying with me." A hand then gently rested on the back of Mash's head, letting her feel something like fingers play with some of her hair as Vy finished with a choked up, "I-I love you too, my beloved kouhai. Let's just keep doing our best together, okay?"

"Of course, senpai."

Mash knew that as long as they were together, things could work out. They could still have hope.