Cuts of RWBY
A RWBY Fic Collection by AndrewJTalon
DISCLAIMER: This is a fan based work of prose. RWBY is the property of Rooster Teeth and WB Animation. Please support the official release.
Just a collection of plot bunnies and ideas for RWBY fics. Free for you to take and make use of.
For instance... Yang and Jaune are the only members of their team with driver's licenses. So they bitch about it afterwards.
Yang stormed into the common room nearby Team RWBY and JNPR's dorms, her eyes burning red in her anger. She stomped to the cabinet over the kitchenette, and threw it open. She pushed aside the various boxes of snacks and cereal, seeking out her respite... But her search was in vain. She growled angrily.
"Who the hell took my booze?!" She growled.
"Yo."
She turned her fiery glare over at a nearby couch. Jaune Arc sat there, pouring himself a glass of her whiskey!
"That's not yours!" She accused. Usually, Jaune would cringe or even cower when she was really angry. Instead, he glared blearily at her as he held the glass up to his lips.
"I'll buy you another five bottles, but right now? I need it." He threw it back with some familiarity. He still coughed a little, but not nearly as much as she thought Vomit Boy might. He shook his head and made a face. "Gods, this is awful."
"It's my favorite!" Yang growled back, storming over and sitting across from him. She grabbed her own glass and poured herself some. She threw it back, unable to keep one cough from escaping her mouth, nor a wheeze. "Haa... It's supposed to taste like drain cleaner!"
"No, whiskey is supposed to taste like whiskey," Jaune stated firmly, "Not this crap. You're supposed to savor it as you get drunk."
"I don't want to savor it, I wanna be mad and drunk!" Yang growled. Jaune was enough of a gentleman to pour her another, and she was enough of a lady to nod back in appreciation despite her mood.
"Me too, but I'm still a connoisseur," Jaune sniffed.
"That a fancy word for snob?"
"It...!" Jaune paused, and poured himself another glass. "I guess so. What are you mad about?"
Yang sighed in deep anger as she sipped her glass.
"Just because I'm the only one with a freaking driver's license, that makes me the team taxi!"
Jaune nodded.
"Oh Gods, yeah. That's bullshit!"
Yang nodded back enthusiastically, seeing the recognition in his eyes. That mutual sense of being absolutely fucking done.
"YEAH! Why am I suddenly on call 24/7 for every stupid dumbass thing my team gets up to?!" Yang demanded. "Why do I have to risk my dad's car to pick up Blake when she gets in a fight with the White Fang?!"
"I know right?!" Jaune growled, throwing back another glass of the not awful whiskey, thank you very much! "I had to go bail Nora out of jail for trying to steal a sloth from the zoo! THE ZOO! Ren was supposed to be watching her!"
"Why do I have to pick up Weiss's fucking dry cleaning?!" Yang complained, accepting another full glass from Jaune before sipping it angrily. "AND PAY FOR IT?! She's got BUTLERS who can do that for her!"
"As much as I care about Pyrrha," Jaune said, "WHY do I have to pick up her freaking agents and publicists from the airport for her?! They're all so fucking sleazy and slimy and CREEPY! Are they trying to groom her?! If I was her I'd fire them all! OUT OF A CANNON!"
"AND WHY DO I HAVE TO FETCH MY UNCLE EVERY TIME HE'S NAKED AND DRUNK IN PUBLIC?!" Yang roared. She slammed the glass down, almost breaking it as she glared at nothing. "YOU CAN TURN INTO A FUCKING BIRD, DAMNIT!"
Jaune snickered.
"Asshole probably doesn't wanna get cooked."
"I'd cook him!" Yang growled. "I'd cook him with-with fucking shallots and garlic!"
"Crows aren't good for cooking, too lean and gamey," Jaune said with a nod. Yang stared at him, blinked away the fuzzies in her vision.
"But you'd still cook him if I asked, right?"
Jaune finished his latest glass, and nodded, smacking his lips as he wobbled on the other couch.
"Fuck yeah I would. With... With wild mushrooms and field greens. Like Argula... Arugululu... That one."
Yang snorted in laughter.
"You're drunk!"
"Yeah, I wanted to be drunk," Jaune snorted back, giggling a little. He stood up and spread his arms widely. "So I'm drunk! GO ME!"
"WOO! YOU WIN AT GETTING DRUNK!" Yang cheered. She threw back another glass of the whiskey, the burning hitting her so well. "Fuuuuck... Yeah..."
She went to the bottle... Then glared when she found it empty.
"Jaune! Hey, Jaune!"
"Yeah?" Jaune asked.
Yang held up the bottle with a scowl.
"Someone drank our booze!"
"Fuck... I mean... Did we have that much?" Jaune asked, leaning over to stare at the empty bottle. "I don't-I'm drunk, but... I didn't have that much... What proof is this?"
"Realllllyyyy high," Yang giggled, "Fuck! Someone... Someone stole some from us! That dick!"
"Fuck that guy!" Jaune agreed. He looked up at Yang and shared her scowl. "We gotta... We gotta get more, Yang! I'm-I'm not done complaining and being drunk!"
"Me neither!" Yang agreed happily. Jaune stood up, wobbled, and fell over the coffee table onto her. His face landed between her breasts. She laughed uproariously.
"You-Geez, you are drunk!"
"Nuh... Yeah," Jaune mumbled, looking up at her, "Yeah. That's... That's what I wanted... You drunk?"
Yang shrugged.
"Drunk enough," she said. She snickered.
"You went right between my boobs!"
"I couldn't MISS!" Jaune shot back angrily. Yang laughed harder, as Jaune blushed. "S'not funny!"
"So is! I knew you looked at 'em!" She cackled.
"So does everyone else!" Jaune countered. Yang smirked at him, enjoying his anger. It was nice to not be the only wounded party around here, for once.
Like, actually wounded.
"So you admit to it?"
"Yes!" He growled.
"Pyrrha's too?"
"YES!"
"Weiss's..." Yang broke down in laughter. "SHE AIN'T GOT ANY!"
"I KNOW!" Jaune shot back, "She's still hot! You're all so freaking hot!"
"And you go after the slim rich ballerina!" Yang giggled. Jaune scowled.
"What's funny bout-bout that?!"
"Well, if you asked, Pyrrha'd have yer babies," Yang snickered, "Ruby... I'd kill ya, but she'd be down-"
"What about you, huh?" Jaune asked challengingly. Yang smirked back at him.
"Well... That would require you having balls," she teased. "Vombit Oy! Vomit... Bomit Voy..."
"I do have balls!"
"You're on top of me," Yang laughed, "And you're not doing anything-!"
Jaune, driven by alcohol, hormones, and outrage, leaned in and kissed her. It wasn't a childish peck, either-Full tongue action commenced, and Yang was hardly going to let someone invade one of her orifices without challenge.
They made out furiously, sloppily, drunkenly... Before Jaune rolled over and took Yang with him to the floor with a thud.
"OOF!"
Jaune groaned, but he grinned back at her in triumph.
"Who... Doesn't have balls... Now, huh?" He growled.
She pulled him into another kiss, to shut him up.