A Visiting Card
Q froze, his heart racing but his body almost painfully still.
"... What?"
"How long have you been pranking Edie?" Alexis repeated, as calm as ever.
He gave a quick glance towards the elevator doors, but they remained firmly shut, and since they were travelling down from the top floor and medical was almost in the basement…
There was no way that he could get out of this.
"I don't know what you're talking about, 001".
She rolled her eyes at him. "Don't code name, Q, it makes you look guilty. I'm guessing that none of the others know?"
"Know what? There's nothing to know".
"Duncan? Saif?"
"I have no idea what you're going on about".
"I'm guessing Charlie is on Edie's team considering they're best friends and all, and I wouldn't be surprised if they'd somehow dragged Saif into it, but Duncan's a smart boy who knows to stay out of other people's business. Does M know?"
"I still don't know what you're-"
"Q".
He rather obviously avoided her gaze.
There was a few seconds of silence, a loud sigh, and then a sudden movement towards him that had him automatically flinching back.
Alexis paused, arms still outstretched from where was undoubtedly reaching to hug him, and he suddenly felt rather foolish. Flushing, Q ducked his head and prayed for the elevator to move faster. After another moment, the alpha sighed again, quieter this time, and softer too, before she very carefully took a step back, away from Q and away from the elevator doors, until there was nothing stopping him from being able to bolt as soon as they opened.
"I'm not going to hurt you, honey" she said gently, "I swear. And none of the others will, either. They quite literally just killed a man for you, after all".
"I know!" he said, sharper than he intended, "I know they did, I just… I'm sorry".
"You have nothing to be sorry for" Alexis replied just as quickly, "I mean it. What happened to you, what happened in your past… none of that was your fault".
Q inched ever so slightly closer to the door even as he turned to face her, a suspicious look on his face.
"How much do you know?"
"Nothing asides from what I've seen" she answered honestly, "You don't like loud noises, you flinch at unexpected movements or touch, yet at the same time you lean into that touch like you're starved for it… Between that, and the lack of information in your file, it's not difficult to come to a rather unpleasant conclusion".
He couldn't help but scoff and shake his head. "Unpleasant sure is one word for it… Your packmates don't appear to be as observant as you are".
"They're not". She grinned. "Quite blind the lot of them, really. With the exception of Charlie and Jake, perhaps".
"004? We haven't met. What's he like?"
"He's kind. Don't change the subject".
Q took a deep calming breath and glanced up at the elevator screen above the door, watching as it counted down painfully slow.
"... I don't know what you want me to say".
"Are they still alive?"
"Yes".
"Will you tell me their name?"
"No".
Alexis studied him closely, looking for any tells. "We weren't lying about what we told you earlier on, you know. You don't deserve to be hurt, Q. And we will gladly track down all the bastards in your past who did so".
"That's not your job, 001".
"No. It's my privilege, Quartermaster" she shot back, "They're only looking in your file because they want answers".
"And they couldn't have simply asked?!"
She raised a sardonic eyebrow. "Would you have told them?"
"Yes! No. Maybe. I don't- I don't know!"
"Well, given that you're refusing to answer me now, would suggest not".
Only four more floors to go.
"They need to learn that it's not okay to go behind someone's back!" he snapped, "On a mission, yes. If someone's life is in danger, then sure. But to ignore the wishes of- of their friend? Of their superior, even? That's not okay".
"And your solution is to prank them? Give them far-fetched stories again and again until one of them snaps?"
Q ran a hand through his hair, frustrated. "It's- It's one solution! Maybe they'll actually remember this lesson, considering that they so obviously ignore every lecture they're given! And besides, it's good for people's morale".
"It's not good for double-0 morale".
"The double-0's aren't people!"
Alexis smirked, amused. "Oh really? And what are we, hun?"
He looked at her cherub-like face and wavy hair and light blue summer dress, at her sparkling green eyes and cupid-bow lips and petite features, at this harmless fae-like creature who looked so dainty and soft and warm but could easily rip a man's throat out with her bare teeth.
"... You're something else" he finally replied, "Something… other".
She hummed non committedly. "Perhaps. But we find you interesting, hun. Intriguing. And we're curious, not just one of us, but all of us… So what does that say about you?"
He ran a tired hand over his face, momentarily dislodging his glasses.
"It's too damn early for mind games, 001. If you have something to say, then just say it".
"You're like us" Alexis replied bluntly, "Not in the traditional sense, not in same way as we're like each other, but you're still… different. Unique. An outsider, if you will".
"And if I won't?" he asked dryly, but she simply smirked in reply. "Oh no, you don't get a choice in the matter, hun. You either have it or you don't. And outside of the double-0 program, not a single one of us has ever met someone like you, someone… other".
The elevator dinged and the doors slid open behind him. Alexis reached forwards to press the "close doors" button. He didn't stop her.
"I've never met an omega who used their dynamic to their advantage before" she continued, "I think it's brilliant. Sneaky, cunning, and a little bit hilarious, but at the end of the day, it's a strategic move that we all respect. We're not nice people, Q. Body count aside, our personalities leave much to be desired and we have all long since given up hope that we would ever find an omega who could understand us. And then you waltzed in, insulted us straight to our face, and then had the nerve to act offended when we didn't immediately kill you!"
Q stared at her, his brain working on overdrive.
"Hang on, is this… is this a proposal?! Are you lot trying to court me?!"
Alexis smiled but shook her head. "No. Not in the way that you're thinking, at least, but then again, the double-0s never do anything normally… We respect you, Q, and that respect is hard to come by. You treat us like- like we're your bloody house cats, which is, admittedly, rather embarrassing, but the point I'm trying to make is… you see us. You see who we are, and what we can do, and what we actually do on a regular basis, and yet despite all that… you treat us for who we are. Not like weapons, not like hitmen, not even like the regular agents. You see us, so completely and so transparently that it's… well, quite frankly, it's fucking terrifying".
The elevator doors started to reopen so she hit the same button again and they slowly shut once more.
"You're incredible, Q. You are so incredible and smart and wickedly sharp and absolutely bloody brilliant! So after all of that, after seeing us and understanding us and- and not fearing us in the slightest despite knowing exactly what we are capable of… Is it really so surprising that we want to protect you?"
Q wanted to cry. He hadn't been spoken to like that in… well, ever, really, and now here he was, in a confined space, with a calm nice soothing alpha telling him that he was worth something, praising him for simply existing after he'd been bereft of kind words for so so long-
He whined, high-pitched and short, and Alexis immediately pulled him into a warm embrace. He felt his eyes burn and angrily tried to shove the tears away, but the alpha was having none of it.
"Hush, you're alright, honey, you're okay" she whispered, one hand in his curls pressing his face to her neck while the other ran up and down his back, firm yet gentle. "You're safe now, I promise, we won't let anything bad happen to you, I swear".
Christ, this was humiliating. Q desperately tried to calm down, willing his tears to subside and his heart rate to slow, but his scent was so distressed that he could smell it himself and he knew that there was no way in hell Alexis would let him go when he was this upset.
He wasn't even sure what he was upset about, a thought which angered him even further. Honestly, it wasn't as if he didn't get some compliments on a semi-regular basis. He was the best at his job, after all, and his minions loved hearing about new ideas that he came up with or different weapon designs, but still, there was something… something different about hearing it come from Alexis. Whether that was because she was a double-0 or because she was an alpha, he wasn't sure, but based on how his omegian instincts had gone into overdrive, he was willing to bet on the latter.
Omega's needed a certain amount of positive reinforcement just to survive. They were biologically wired to require praise, to require touch and affection and petting and-
And all of the things that Q hadn't gotten in so so long, that his own body now didn't even know what to do with them.
From behind him, the doors slid open once more, but in order for Alexis to hit the "close doors" button, she would have had to have let go of him, which they were both rather strongly against. So instead, she glared furiously at the two beta's standing just outside the elevator, and rather sharply yelled, "Fuck off!"
They quickly did as told.
Q let out a somewhat watery laugh and reluctantly forced himself to pull back. Alexis smiled at him, looking as put together as ever despite the tear stains on her dress.
"The Quartermaster of MI6 having a mental breakdown with a double-0" he started, voice somewhat hoarse, "That's going to be all over the building by lunchtime".
"No it won't" Alexis replied confidently, something dark gleaming in her eyes, "I'll make sure of it".
And, really, this right here? This right here was exactly the moment that Q should feel fear, but instead, he couldn't help but smile back, however shaky and unbalanced it was.
"We want to protect you, honey" she continued softly, taking hold of his hands, "Not because we think that you're incapable of doing it yourself, but because we like you. We really really like you, and… well, there's not much else that we can offer, really. We take care of the things we love, and for a double-0, that occasionally involves just a little bit of murder".
He snorted and shook his head, just as amused as he was exasperated.
"I might tell you" he eventually offered, "About me, about my past, and… and all of that, someday. Just not… not right now".
"That's alright" she replied easily, "We'll all still be here if you ever do decide to tell us. No one's going to force you to do anything, hun".
"... Does this mean that I have to stop pranking Edie and Charlie now?"
"Fuck no!" Alexis immediately exclaimed, "Watching those two idiots run around the place is the most fun I've had in years! You better keep those stories coming, mister!"
Q laughed and nodded in agreement before finally disentangling himself from the alpha and taking the final step off of the elevator.
"Are you going back up or are you coming with me?"
She winced. "Sorry, no, I can't. I'm allergic".
"... To medical?"
"Uh huh" she agreed, with a completely straight face, "I think it must be something in the air".
"... In medical?!"
"Oh, no, sorry, hun, the elevator doors are starting to close! I'll talk to you later, okay?"
Q watched in disbelief as she made absolutely zero moves to hit the "open doors" button despite knowing the one next to it very very well, and Alexis vanished behind the metal contraption a few seconds later.
He felt more than a little raw, like something that had been pulled from a washing machine and wrung out to dry, but he also felt… safer? In a way? It felt… good to finally understand where the double-0s were coming from and what their opinions on this strange relationship that they all had were. And despite knowing that he was fully capable of protecting his own damn self, having that extra reassurance of at least five incredibly dangerous alpha's willing to murder for him was… well… it was kind of nice, really.
Medical wasn't as horrible as he'd been expecting, but Q was still glad not to be trapped there for too long. His doctor, a beta, thankfully didn't ask about anything she didn't need to know, so he was blissfully spared from the you-shouldn't-be-on-supressors-for-this-long-it's-unnatural-and-you-should-have-had-a-baby-by-now talk. Funny how all of those "pro-life" alphas disappeared as soon as the baby was born…
He was also saved from having to have his stitches redone, which he was more than grateful for. Apparently, Duncan really was pretty damn good at patching people up, although the doctor did frown a bit when she realised he'd used absorbable polymer thread.
The plus side was that they would dissolve themselves within the next few weeks, meaning that Q wouldn't have to return for anyone to take them out. The downside was that they were known to leave scars, although as far as Q was considered, that wasn't really a disadvantage. It wouldn't be his first scar, and more than likely wouldn't be his last either, but he'd never been self-conscious about that sort of thing anyway so it didn't matter to him. He had also somewhat expected it, considering that Duncan had used his own personal first aid kit to stitch him up and it only made sense that the double-0s relied solely on dissolvable thread. It wasn't as if they had the time (or the desire) to drop into their local GP while jetting around the world from one dangerous mission to the next, after all.
So after a few minutes of poking and prodding and a few more minutes of filling out all the correct forms, he was let go with firm instructions to return immediately if he felt any pain or the wound reopened.
Q smiled and nodded and agreed and then immediately decided to go back to Duncan first instead.
Walking back through medical, he found his gaze drifting towards the long-term patients' rooms, and since he was here anyway…
Making a quick detour, he silently slipped into the hospital wing and walked down the corridor until he found the correct room. He knocked briefly on the door, waiting for the obligatory "come in!" before stepping inside.
R sat in a chair by the window and smiled when she saw him. Directly opposite her was a younger beta woman, and based on their matching rings, Q felt it was safe to assume that this was the alpha's wife.
She didn't look half as friendly.
"I hope I'm not interrupting?" he asked somewhat awkwardly, hovering just inside the door.
The beta remained silent but R continued to smile. "Not at all, Q! Come in, come in! How are you?"
"I feel like I should be the one asking you that" he replied dryly, pulling up a chair, "Any word of when you'll be let out of this place?"
"The doctors say it shouldn't be too long now" she said cheerfully, "There's nothing physically wrong with me after all, so as long as I take the pills they gave me I should be able to return to TSS by the end of the week".
"That's good to hear" he replied, meaning every word, "Things have gotten rather… hectic since you left".
The beta scoffed and turned back to the window, and R gave her a warning look. Q felt slightly miffed at the younger woman's cold reception. He had, admittedly, technically, caused his second-in-command's breakdown in an inadvertent way, but it wasn't as if he'd done it on purpose!
"They have me on anti-anxiety medication" R continued, "Apparently, the last few weeks have been a lot more stressful than I initially realised".
"For you and me both. 001 returned".
"Oh?" Her voice was almost deceptively light. "Is she… behaving?"
Q snorted. "Do any of them behave?"
"When they're around you, they do".
The beta abruptly stood up with a screech of chair legs on linoleum. She gave the omega a rather disgusted look before storming from the room. Q stared after her, more than a little bit confused before slowly turning back to R with raised eyebrows.
The alpha sighed. "My wife is… more than a little annoyed at my current… situation".
"That's… understandable, I guess".
R shook her head. "She's just being childish. I've spent the last ten years complaining about the double-0s, in as much as I could without revealing anything important, of course, and the fact that they never listened to me but now they listen to you… She's a bit annoyed about it, that's all".
Which… Yeah. Q could see why that might cause some… animosity.
"Are you?" he asked quietly, "Mad with me?"
"No, Q, I'm not". She reached out and took hold of his hands in both of her own. "I know you didn't do anything on purpose because you don't have a mean bone in your body. My god, look at you! You're literally wearing a cardigan!"
He glanced down at the soft green fabric, feeling somewhat self-conscious.
"You can't control how other people react to you" she continued, "You can only control how you will react to them. And god knows that you can't control how the double-0s feel about things! It's not your fault that they… like you or listen to you or- or actually try to appear human when they're around you… I'm just worried for you, that's all".
"You don't have to be" he replied firmly, "I mean it, R. They're… absolute terrors at the best of times, but… like you said, they listen to me. And I know that you don't consider that a good thing but…"
"But you do" she finished knowingly, and he flushed and ducked his head to avoid her piercing gaze. "Yeah. I do. And maybe that's incredibly stupid of me, but I don't care… The double-0s need someone in their corner too, and if they've all collectively decided that I'm the best person for that, then…"
"You won't try and dissuade them".
"Do you honestly think they'd act any differently even if I did?"
"Probably not" she admitted, "Stubborn bastards, the lot of them!"
Q huffed a laugh and twisted his hands so he could take hold of hers instead.
"I know why you're worried, and I'm grateful for that concern, but it's really not necessary anymore. The double-0s and I have… struck an agreement, of sorts, one that makes both of us happy. And besides, giving out a few hugs and explosions from time to time is a pretty small price to pay for world peace, don't you think?"
She smiled and shook her head in exasperation. "You know, if Boothroyd had realised just how they'd react to you five years ago…"
"I very likely would have been given the full-time position of human teddy bear, I know" he replied dryly, "But I think that it's good that it all happened this way. Not the explosion, of course, or all the deaths and Spectre and Nine Eyes and the whole lot of it, but without all of that-"
"-the double-0s would never have taken you seriously".
"Exactly". Q gently patted her hands once more before standing. "I'll let you rest and allow your wife to come back in. Is there anything you need?"
"Yeah" she replied dryly, "A holiday".
Q grinned and started to head towards the door. "Well, I can't make any promises, but I'll see what I can do".
Silently closing the door behind him, he headed back towards the elevators. This day had already felt like it had lasted a lifetime between the very-dead-fucking-body and the meeting with M and Alexis' startling confession, but it wasn't even ten yet. And he had a very interesting phone call with 006 scheduled soon that he needed to prepare for.
And if he was correct in presuming the next story that Eve had chosen, then he also needed to brush up on his tightrope walking skills…