I Really Hate Crowds

Hello everyone and welcome to the latest, and much earlier, chapter of I'm Too Sober For This! We got a bit of excitement this time around as the ratings games ceremony gets underway, or at least it tries too. But I'll let you read and find out what happens, and speaking of reading do check out my book, Plains Riders, on Amazon Kindle and Kindle Unlimited! And for those who read my Armory of the Forgotten Hero story know that the next chapter will be the last before a hiatus to let the manga get a bit further ahead. Now the last bit, I'd like to thank my beta reader, Steeler Steelix, Pyromania101 and Third Fang for their help with this chapter! So, with no guest review questions this week, let's dive on in!

The Next Day: King's Heights Arena

This would go down as one of the few times I had seen Serafall in sensible clothing that wasn't magical girl related. She sported a maroon colored blouse and black pants, though she had to straighten the former out a bit after falling asleep on the couch.

We were currently sitting in a viewing hall overlooking the massive King's Heights Arena where all the Ratings Games were held and where the preliminary round of the Young Devil's Gathering would take place. As one might expect, it had numerous seats capable of holding hundreds of people while still having room to spare.

At the moment, though, only five people, me and Serafall included, were in here. The other three present were Grayfia, Ajuka, and the king of the Underworld himself, Sirzechs. There were supposed to be two more, Falbium and Ajuka's Queen. The former was so enamored with his sin of sloth that nothing short of a national emergency could get him to do anything while the latter was more of a scientist who kept watch over Ajuka's laboratory while he was gone.

The two Devils hadn't been seen in public for over a decade so no one was surprised when they didn't show up for this event. As for the Maous present, they all sat in wooden chairs that were more reminiscent of thrones on an upraised platform, allowing them a good view of the "U-shape" which held seventy-two chairs and ornamental desks meant to seat the Elder Council who would be viewing the event alongside us. Said council members would be arriving shortly and pay their respects to the Maous before being seated. After that, all the Devils for the Young Devil's Gathering would arrive.

So while we waited, I wound up checking out a device Ajuka had worked on that analyzed one's personal stats and information known as the Codex Gigas. Unfortunately, I found it could only work on those with Evil Pieces in them.

So much for analyzing our guest.

We had easily been able to confirm that Issei was human as we didn't sense any Evil Pieces or holy power coming from him, save for that shroud wrapped around his right arm.

It became obvious after talking to him for a few minutes that he was familiar with quite a bit about the Devil, Angel and Fallen Angel factions. Or rather he was familiar with his versions of those factions.

The story he told us of his "Serafall" didn't match up with my mine, and there were a few other stories with similar inconsistencies, although roughly half were due to my appearance, and the other half seemed to be something that occurred in his world when he was a child that he wouldn't go into detail about other than "it probably all started when that asshole showed up". Nobody pressed for details.

It was quickly agreed that Issei should try not to talk to anyone here like he knew them to avoid any possible misunderstandings, or incidents.

I personally didn't know how much of what he said was true but one thing that seemed certain was that he was going to remain in his room for the duration of the event. It would be what we did afterwards that would require some thinking.

Not that it seemed to be much of an accomplishment. The alternate Sekiryuutei was more than happy to isolate himself from the rest of the world and pretend that said world didn't exist.

Too happy, in hindsight. For such an… overtly expressive individual, he was disturbingly hard to read at times.

For now, though, I put it out of my mind and focused on the ceremony as one of the oldest Devils in existence, Zekram Bael, had just entered and announced the preparations were complete. Sirzechs answered cheerfully to go ahead and let the council enter.

And shortly after they entered, all the other young Devils were allowed in as well, including Sona, Rias, and their respective Peerages. Thus began the most tedious part of the Young Devil's Gathering. I call it tedious because there were over a hundred Devils signed up for the gathering and more than a few of them had the same goal. I think I counted seven future Rating Game champions and that wasn't even halfway through.

And these weren't the shortest goal statements either since they took a few minutes. The participants had to walk up to the podium, announce their goals and then answer any questions from the Maous or the elder council. Said goals pretty much ranged from upholding their clan's honor, winning every Rating Game match, to becoming the head of their clan. That was pretty much it so things got so mind-numbingly boring that I distracted myself by looking around the room.

The most exciting thing we got so far was when Sairaorg Bael stepped forward and made a bold declaration: to redefine what it means to be strong and to become a Maou. It was a surprising declaration to some given that Sairaorg had been born without his clan's gift or even any magic to speak of. Instead, he had honed his body to its utmost and grown to be the strongest among the current generation of young Devils. But he didn't want to become just any Maou. He wished to one day challenge Sirzechs himself.

The king of the Underworld then quickly reminded everyone who he really was by flaring some of his aura and forcing the majority of the occupants in the room to their knees. I was one of the few to remain standing along with Sairaorg and the Nemean Lion in his Peerage, some of the elders, and a cloaked Pawn in Rias's Peerage. Then after a few more repeated declarations was Riser Phenex who declared his ambition was "women." While it was certainly different, it definitely wasn't the best declaration to be making to the brother of the woman one was engaged too.

But it definitely gained a better reaction than when Sona came up. Now this was something I paid attention to, even if she hadn't been the little sister of Serafall. Because unlike all the others, her ambition was less personal and more set about changing things for Reincarnated Devils like myself. She wanted to create a combat school for both Reincarnated and low-class Devils.

This idea was met with laughter and though she didn't flinch from it, keeping her emotionless mask up, I was one of the few who knew how angry she probably was underneath. Though that, and many other things would become a secondary concern very shortly.

Because someone else apparently knew about Sona's inner thoughts, and had already done something about it.

The Sitri clan heiress seemed to space out for a moment, but what was really happening was her vision was changing.

A sudden and strange power welled up inside of her before she blinked.

An image appeared that only she could see.

The image of a large, spherical room that was pitch-black, save for the numerous pinpricks of light all over it, giving the room the appearance of a starlit sky.

In the center of the room was a wooden chair that, while extravagant with a fine hue, was not repulsive in its decoration as a chair owned by an elite might be.

A hovering book floated above the chair which was the size of a regular encyclopedia, yet Sona was certain there were far more pages in it.

But what captivated her the most was the shadowed figure sitting on the chair.

She couldn't make him out well but he was clearly an older man with a beard. However, that would be all she saw of him for the moment.

He seemed to take notice of her and made a motion with his hand that caused the pages in his book to start turning rapidly.

The next thing Sona knew, she was back in the Rating Games ceremony with no one seeming to have noticed her temporary lapse into whatever vision she had just seen.

Perhaps because they were all preoccupied with the sudden appearance of a red magic circle right in front of her.

"What? That circle again?" She almost blurted out as a figure materialized within it lying casually on his back with legs crossed, one hand behind his head and another in front of his face holding a cell phone as though the individual had just been chilling on a bed.

An unfortunately familiar figure.

Hyoudou Issei.

And, unsurprisingly, given their earlier conversation, he was on his phone watching what was undoubtedly raunchy porn given the noises coming from his phone.

"For fuck's sake." He said in irritation as he clicked his phone off and stood up. "Can't a guy watch his porn in peace for more than an hour before…?"

He trailed off as he took in the scene around him. A hundred pairs of eyes were on him just from the gathered young Devils alone and that wasn't counting the scrutinizing, confused, and angry gazes coming from the members of the Elder Council.

Lastly, was a look of confusion from the Maous themselves.

Issei's mind slowly went blank as he felt his breathing quicken and his heart rate skyrocket. Rampant flashes of several traumatizing personal experiences half a decade ago that resembled the scene he was in smothered virtually every and any attempt to regain any form of self-control.

In the back of his mind, he vaguely remembered that this must be the Rating Games ceremony that had been mentioned earlier, but that still didn't explain why he had been teleported in the middle of the damn thing.

Someone in the crowd must've done it, but who?

He scanned the audience frantically but the longer people starred at him the more nervous he got.

'Which one did this? Which walking corpse knew how I'd react to this?!'

Every instinct he had was telling him to get the hell out of there, but where would he go? His Dragon Gate worked back in his world, but he didn't know this world's geography or marked points in this one to use.

"Serafall," came the voice of Sirzechs as Issei whirled around to look at the Maous, "Could you explain—?"

But before the Maou could finish, Issei lost it.

It wasn't so much a flare of power as it was the teen's very existence seemed to take on a different weight and fundamental definition.

All present stood in front of a massive cave that housed a monstrous beast hidden deep within its confines.

A monster that was no longer sleeping, because they were all too close.

"Presence" was something he learned from the outer dimensional being residing in his right arm. It was a peculiar ability. Not quite power. Not quite intent. Not quite aura. But a peculiar and meticulous mixture of all of that and more. Something that altered and enhanced one's "self-definition" and "position" in reality itself, used by many that jumped between worlds to better adjust if not outright reject the environments, natural laws, and sometimes even gods and ruling figures that they encountered.

In some circles, it was said to be a way to become "a god of oneself." To be the utmost authority of oneself and dictate what they could and could not do, and nothing more.

In other circles, it's considered one of the most conceptually narcissistic skills in existence.

The image and sensations it produced were nothing more than a facsimile, a silhouette of the nature of the individual at their very core. Said image could be anything. An idea. A vague concept. An animal. Harmless by itself, but then again, technically so was standing just a few inches away from the most dangerous animal or phenomenon without touching them. It didn't make the experience or instinctual knee jerk reaction any less overwhelming.

However, that wasn't to say that this ability did not come without drawbacks.

A trait founded in authority and definition was flawed when issues of self-control were present or took place.

Such as, for example, when deeply rooted severe childhood trauma was triggered.

Terror swept through most of the gathered young Devils in the stadium as several turned to flee while the Maous and the Elder Council all sprang to their feet. From their perspective, a wild beast had appeared in their midst, and it had no intention of taking prisoners.

Serafall wasted no time and made the first move, launching from her chair like a miniature jet taking off, her wand already weaving magic that threw up an ice wall behind Issei.

Ice spikes also shot up from the floor near him, but despite being a human, he quickly evaded them by jumping up just high enough to have them brush the underside of his sneakers while the magical girl Maou landed on the floor only a few feet away with her wand pointing at him.

Or at least it had been a few feet before the Red Dragon Emperor seemed to suddenly appear before her and grabbed her outstretched arm with glowing hands.

Eyes wide with alarm, the Maou instantly threw herself back, sliding back several feet as a block of ice fell apart that was covering where she had been accosted.

Behind the block of ice, she grimaced and moved her wand to her other hand, as the former was now tingling and hard to control. She'd be able to fix the issue in time, but dealing with this type of damage was more complex than conventional wounds.

"He's a battle medic! Be careful of his white magic!" She shouted in warning to the others so they wouldn't fall prey to their opponent's unexpected use of deceptively invasive magic.

"Oh you have got to be fucking—that shit title is a thing here too!?" The Sekiryuutei's maddened state slightly broke into something slightly more comical for a moment before sensing another, far more menacing entity behind him.

He instinctively swung his left arm around only for the vice-like grip of Sirzechs to close around it before yanking him off of his feet and swinging him towards the ice spikes conjured earlier.

"BOOST! EXPLOSION!"

The sound of Ddraig's voice echoed out through the chamber of spikes as Issei's body broke through the ice. Fortunately, the appearance of the red gauntlet that was his Sacred Gear seemed to be enough to convince the Maou to let go in mid swing.

Issei flew a few feet before landing and sliding even further before steadying himself.

'Increased my durability at the last moment.' He thought as the double helix-like coil around his irregular Sacred Gear started to condense and discharge like a spring several times. 'Not enough time for the full set of enhancements before they charge at me again. Have to go on the offense first for control.'

Sirzechs in turn looked at his hand and flexed it. The duration of their physical contact was brief, and the Maou's natural power was great, but the boy's power had still managed to invade his body enough to numb some of his nerves in that brief moment. Impressive. And dangerous. He'd have to be more cautious.

It was good for the Maou that he had that frame of mind when he noticed the Longinus wielder take a small step towards him…

…only to seemingly instantly warp right in front of his body with his hand heading towards his chest. Said Devil in turn already had his hand up with the black and red lightning of destruction crackling in his palm.

But it turned out to be a feint with Issei shifting his body with another subtle sidestep, and warping over to Serafall who had been moving to get back into the fight. Her eyes shone with surprise as the Red Dragon Emperor appeared in front of her and threw a hand reaching for her stomach.

'One down.' He thought before light flashed around Serafall's body, and his hand hit empty air. 'Damn, forgot she could do that.'

He whirled around with his left arm raised just in time to block a fireball, not an ice ball, a fireball aimed at his face.

It was supposed to be a beginner's spell known as Fire Shot, which was something even young Devils could learn with a little practice. But in the hands of a Maou like Serafall, even a beginner-level spell packed a punch and this one had enough strength to send Issei sliding back before it dissipated.

The fact that she used a fire-based spell on what she knew was a Sekiryuutei was not missed on either party.

Nor the fact that it did next to nothing to him, except make him stumble a step.

"Leviathan, this isn't funny." Issei growled, his image and tone warping into something far more primal, menacing, and malicious than the borderline comical porn clown he had portrayed himself as just a few minutes earlier. "Why the fuck did you summon me again? Unless you haven't figured it out yet, I was underselling the fact that I don't. Do. Fucking. Crowds."

"I didn't summon you." The magical girl Devil replied with narrowed eyes. "You popped up here on your own."

The Longinus wielder growled in a way that was distinctively not human, his burning temper already enflamed with renewed intensity if the rage in his eyes was any indication. "Did that array look like my Gate? Or any Dragon Gate for that matter? Did I look like I expected to show up here? You think I wanted to pop up here of all places while I was watching porn in peace on my phone? Did I do anything to anyone when I first showed up? Remind me again who was the hypocritical, shortsighted, mid-life crisis moron that threw the first punch?"

Serafall gritted her teeth and clenched her wand. As rude as he was, he had a point. She was the one that had poked the angry bear, or dragon in this case, to finally react. Still… "You proved to be a danger to everyone here. It's our duty to protect our people, like my sister, from threats, potential or otherwise."

"Hah." It was an ugly thing, that mocking and disappointed laugh. "No wonder your people can't get their act together with hypocrites like you in high seats. Different world, same bullshit. And for a moment, I thought you might have been different."

She didn't know why but his words hit and hurt far harder than they should have.

"Would someone like to fill me in on who this is and why he seems to know you, Serafall?" Sirzechs asked, though his stance didn't relax.

"The overaged magical girl over there summoned me on accident, or so she says." Issei replied. "And the same shit just happened here, and before I can get a word in you fuckers try to kill me. This is what I get for trying to be patient with Devils. Fuck this. Call Azazel. If he's anything like back home, I can at least entertain him enough to not try and kill me in my sleep and pretend that he's not being an idiot about it."

"Azazel? As in the Fallen Angel, Azazel?" Sirzechs replied with a raised eyebrow. "I doubt he had anything to do with this. If he really did create a Sacred Gear as powerful as yours, then he would've kept it for himself. What is yours, exactly?"

"He's the Red Dragon Emperor from another world." Serafall answered. "Not sure how, but I summoned him to my home by accident. I've got no idea why he's here now."

"Oh now she starts asking relevant questions!"

"If that's the case, then it would be best if we contain him to make sure he isn't teleported somewhere else." Sirzechs said. "It would be bad if two Red Dragon Emperors were to meet on the surface."

"I ain't going anywhere except to the nearest bedroom containing WiFi, a laptop, and class-eight security seals to keep you morons away from me," Issei growled as his Sacred Gear's green jewel glowed and the coil around his arm cocked itself with a sound not all that different to a shotgun pumping. "So unless you know where a spare one is, move before I show you what a real 'fisting' is. Again."

"And here I'd hoped to resolve this situation without destroying something. Sadly we don't have such facilities available on hand." The Maou said with a sigh, ignoring that 'again' comment, before raising his hand and cocking his fingers. "Come and try then."

Hyoudou didn't wait for any further invitation as he warped again with a left jab that sailed right by Sirzech's head, not doing much more than ruffling his crimson hair, and not at the Maou's chest as intended.

The Devil responded with a destruction-powered punch aimed at Issei's ribs which he blocked with his bandaged right hand, somehow remaining intact and not obliterated despite the redhead's powers. The ball of red and black also served as a barrier preventing the Sekiryuutei's white magic from causing any further damage.

'The hell was that?' The Red Dragon Emperor thought as he blocked and evaded Sirzech's punches in rapid succession while trying to land a few touches of his own. 'I stepped right at him and he didn't move until after I reappeared, so why was I off at an angle?'

It was a question he didn't have time to dwell on as he jumped and dodged a pair of ice spikes that shot out of the floor.

He looked down from where he was suspended in the air to see Serafall waving her wand to generate a widespread mass of shuriken-sized snowflakes that all swarmed towards him.

"As if." Issei said before inhaling and blasting a large jet of flame out of his mouth, evaporating the flakes and forcing the Maou to create a ten-foot tall, very thick ice wall to block the flames. The result was a mass of mist blanketing the area where Issei landed.

He leapt out of the way just as the black bolts of destruction erupted from the mist while putting his hands behind his back.

He pulled out a pistol, the type used by the church exorcists and applied his Boost to it, firing in the direction of his attacker. While the gun itself was pretty ordinary, the application of his Boost ability to the bullets accelerated them much higher than normal.

Or at least it was supposed to.

While the bullets did fly faster, they didn't go as fast as they should have, and were quickly disintegrated by Sirzechs' Power of Destruction. Which was odd because he had amplified the bullets enough to at the very least disrupt the charges a little before being obliterated.

'Now it's happening to whatever I'm Boosting in addition to my jumps. Someone's fucking with me.' He mentally groaned in frustration before whirling around to aim his gun at the opponent who had tried coming up behind him.

However, he was just the slightest bit too slow as Serafall grasped the firearm and froze it, forcing Issei to let go of the tool lest he risk getting frozen along with it.

Amazingly, Serafall had anticipated this possibility and reshaped some of the ice around the gun into a blade that she swung at the Longinus wielder.

"Seriously?" Issei cursed under his breath as he dodged the swipes from the improvised sword. "Why do you have to be more creative in this world?"

"Who says a magical girl can't be creative?" She replied with more than a little snark before suddenly blasting the weapon apart when it was close to Hyoudou's face.

"Says the you that's busy actually taking her job in politics seriously enough to bitch about the lack of free time." Issei leapt back while shielding his eyes with his gauntlet before jumping up and backflipping over Sirzechs' attempted punch imbued with his Power of Destruction.

In the few moments that he was in the air, he caught a flash of a green-haired figure still sitting on one of the thrones.

'Of course. Should have noticed it earlier.' Issei realized as he focused his vision and noticed a very large, green magic circle covering almost the entire stadium floor. 'Damn you and your Kankara Formula, Ajuka.'

The Red Dragon Emperor assumed the Maou's power worked similarly in this world as it did his own. Ajuka Beelzebub had what was known as Calculation Demonic Power: He could literally use equations and formulas to control phenomena and that included control over others' powers.

That's why Issei's warp ability from his Endless Crimson Horde had missed since the direction had been changed slightly when he had amplified the distance.

That's also why his Boosts were acting weird as if the limiters had been put back on at irregular times.

That wasn't to say he didn't have ways around it, but as pissed as he was, he'd rather not show his full hand just yet. It would only cause more headaches if he did.

'Well, let's see just how many quality phenomenon you can control at once.' Issei thought as he landed and breathed more fire out of his mouth. But instead of a regular jet of flames like before, the now deep crimson and black fire took on the shape of a European-style dragon that swiped at Sirzechs and Serafall, forcing them back before he warped a short distance away from them while the dragon started heading for the slightly curious Ajuka.

He then tilted his head to the side to dodge a small salvo of ice spikes that nearly impaled him.

"I'm really starting to hate this world, which is saying something considering the shit I've gone through back home." Issei stated with firm annoyance. "You assholes are gonna make me wreck more shit than I feel like payin' for."

"As grateful as we are that you are willing to financially reimburse us, you can always just surrender." Sirzechs pointed out. "It's not like I plan to let Ajuka use you as a lab rat."

"You and the other two factions made promises to me in my world, and then screwed me over by leaving me out to dry. Half-assed claims. Half-assed logic. Half-assed excuses. Half-assed efforts. So long as it isn't someone you're directly tied to, you pricks can and will shaft anyone without hesitation for petty short term gains." Issei replied with narrowed eyes. "Don't think I'm gonna let you make false promises to me in this world—"

BOOM!

Everyone's head turned to see the flame dragon that Issei had unleashed was blasted apart as a newcomer with a powerful orange aura, a bald head with a goatee, silver armor, and a purple cape stood in front of Ajuka.

"Damn all of you," the man or rather Devil said, "I've told you before that working means losing for me. Now who do I have to thank for the shit show here that made me get out of bed?"

"That's…Falbium." I said with some genuine surprise, finally setting Sona down in what I hoped was a safe location.

It hadn't been easy even with the ice wall that Serafall had conjured to protect them. I had to move in with the maximum speed of my reinforced limbs, dodge around the magics that were flying everywhere, grab Sona, and repeat said dodging process before finally ending up here.

"I believe so." The Sitri heiress replied, doing her best to remain composed while adjusting her glasses. "The situation must be far worse than I thought if Falbium decided to come down here himself."

"Honestly, I think it's all just a big misunderstanding." I offered while watching the now four Maous engage in fighting against the other-worlder. "I spoke with Sera while we were waiting for the ceremony to start, and she told me that Issei suffered some sort of trauma that makes him severely distrustful of others. Whatever's happening right now, I'm sure it's a result of it flaring up… and admittedly a poor initial approach to trying to get him to calm down."

"That monstrous aura from before did seem like it was raised as a defense mechanism." Sona agreed, slightly disturbed that there was a version of Issei Hyoudou of all people that possessed it. "So now the question is: how do we get him to calm down enough to listen to reason?"

I let out a long sigh at the question. Whether I wanted to or not, I was going to get in the middle of all this. Even if nobody was clearly going all-out, it wasn't everyday that someone was able to firmly hold their own against multiple Maous. Let alone just one.

"I'll stop him." I declared. "Before he's able to hurt anyone."

"Are you sure you want to go down there?" The Sitri heiress asked with a questioning gaze.

"Whether I want to or not, my King, your sister, is down there." I reminded her. "If nothing else, I at least have to do my job."

Sona turned her attention to the continuing battle below, likely wanting to say any number of things right now. But what she settled on was two simple words:

"Good luck." She finally said with a tilt of her head.

I nodded once before heading back down to the stadium. I need to do this carefully. Especially considering that ice, fireballs, energy spheres, destruction bolts, and debris were flying everywhere.

Issei was dodging at an extreme speed, using his warp ability whenever a pincer maneuver was attempted to evade, though it was risky with Ajuka still making minor adjustments to his course. He had almost run into ice spikes, debris, and Sirzechs several times in the past minute alone.

The teen had continuously traded blows with Sirzechs. The hyper-focused white magic in his hands clashed with Sirzechs' Power of Destruction repeatedly while each tried to land a single body blow that would end the fight right then and there.

Serafall moved in and struck whenever the opportunity presented itself, spawning ice spikes, throwing ice spears and shuriken-sized snowflakes, blasting fireballs and attempting to freeze him and impede his movements whenever she could.

Issei would react by firing off a blast of fire at her whenever he could, but she either teleported out of the way or Falbium moved in front of her and blocked the attack with his power of Absolute Defense.

'If this keeps up I'm gonna wind up killing one of them by accident. Or cause another shit show that will put the entire fucking world against me.' Issei thought as he kept trying to use his repository of stored Boosts to further amplify functions of his body as the fight continued.

His subspecies didn't have the hard built-in limits of the conventional variant, so he didn't know how many conventional Boosts his body could take before he killed himself (as what happened to prior owners of this subspecies). But, as a practitioner of white magic and medicine, he sure as hell knew what he could amplify nigh endlessly without any repercussions at all. The only issue was that he had to amplify them one at a time.

But as a result, even the Maou could tell that even with their numerical advantage and Ajuka's magic, their opponent was getting faster, sharper, and stronger as the fight dragged on. Prompting them to change tactics.

At one point, both Serafall and Sirzechs unleashed their powers at the same time. Strangely, their attacks seemed to divert around him, tearing up the floor or embedding ice spikes on the ground.

Then the magical girl Maou sent out another Fire Shot that moved erratically. Again, a manipulation of Ajuka's powers.

Issei quickly calculated that there was no need to dodge it or the other powers as he instead tried to figure out why they were boxing him in.

The reason became obvious when Falbium suddenly came up behind him, the numerous attacks from earlier striking against his Absolute Defense, right before he shifted it to Offensive Position. The force of all the attacks from earlier, Sirzechs destruction blasts and Serafall's ice, were released by his orange aura and further enhanced with Ajuka's Kankara Formula to be even stronger.

Issei just managed to whip up the strongest barrier of fire and magic that he could while simultaneously Boosting his durability. But it still hurt like an absolute bitch when the attack hit.

The blast shattered all of his magical defenses and sent him flying like a ragdoll into the stadium wall, cratering it to the point of practical collapse.

The Red Dragon Emperor let out a pained grunt after a few moments while shifting some of the rubble off of him. Meanwhile the cuts and scrapes he did get started to glow as his white magic started to treat them without any verbal spell or magic circle.

"What the absolute dildo-swinging, reverse cowgirl, horseshit fuck is going on?" He cursed under his breath. Several things weren't making sense at the moment.

In his world, he had stood up and fought the leaders of the Fallen Angels, Devils, and Angel factions and nearly killed them when he was thirteen. True he had access to his other Sacred Gear, and been in a blind psychotic episode-induced Juggernaut Drive at the time, but they knew his powers and tricks intimately by then. They knew how to fight and counter most of his abilities by that point, and had been going all out.

Even if this brawl was considered half-assed by comparison by all parties involved, he shouldn't be doing this badly against the four Maous with what he had now. At the very least, he should have managed to knock out one of them by now, even at the risk of forcing the others to take the fight seriously and escalate the situation.

There could be all sorts of reasons: His power was easier to influence here since it was not his original world, or these Maous were just stronger, though that couldn't be determined for certain unless they really started fighting in earnest.

It definitely didn't help his case that he had been a hikikomori for half a decade and was only just recently getting some hands on practice again. He probably would have noticed Ajuka fucking with him the moment he had set up the Kankara Formula far earlier if he wasn't so damn rusty.

"Why am I always putting up with bullshit like this?" He seethed more to himself than anyone else there, staring blankly at the ceiling. Despite his personality, he was not the sort that looked for trouble. It always came to him. And then he was left holding the bag in front of everyone. This disaster was no different as far as the general public would see it soon enough. "Is it not enough that I'm screwed over in my world already?"

The Maous were closing in now and their signature abilities pulsing around their bodies.

"Fuck it." He made a decision and picked himself up. "I'll just beat you all bloody and tear a hole back home at the same time. Someone else can clean up for once."

He then reached for the cloth wrap on his right arm, preparing to undo it and yank it off.

He was ready to unleash his second Sacred Gear. One that did not exist in any reality but his own.

But just as he was getting started, a massive cleaver-like stone sword with a large guard embedded itself on the floor between him and the Maous.

'That's Berserker's sword.' Issei recognized it after a moment.

The next thing he knew, a warm sensation came over him as a blanket was draped over his shoulders.

Looking up, Issei was greeted by none other than me, Emiya Shirou.

"My King." I said, turning to Serafall and giving a quick bow. "Honored Maous. Our sincerest apologies for this interruption. We had intended to tell you about the presence of a second Hyoudou Issei in our world after the ceremony had concluded."

"Do you know this person, Emiya Shirou?" Sirzechs asked, finally relaxing his stance. The other Maous did as well, and Falbium wasted no time flat-out sitting down.

"An accidental summoning brought him here." I explained. "My King, Serafall, was also present and can explain the matter in full detail. While she does that, I would kindly ask for your permission to escort this 'Issei' out of the stadium."

"You saw what just happened." Ajuka pointed out as he walked up next to the other Maous. "This Sekiryuutei is not incompetent. Are you certain that you can handle him on your own?"

"I don't think it will prove necessary for me to fight him." I replied. "Hyoudou trusts me more than anyone else in this world right now, and I believe that once he has a moment to calm down then we'll be able to sort this out in a more rational manner."

"I vote we just let them go." Serafall suggested, getting a couple of sideways glances from the other Maous. "Shi-chan isn't lying when he says that Issei trusts him, and I do have some things I need to clear up with all of you about his presence here in the first place. And as long as they don't go too far, we can just jump in and pick up from where we left off."

"So help me if that idiot shoots first and asks questions later again…" the Sekiryuutei growled under his breath, only to stop as I coughed slightly.

"Fine with me." Falbium said with a yawn. "Anything that involves less work at this point sounds good."

"Emiya Shirou has proven reliable in the past." Ajuka admitted. "And I've got plenty of data to analyze from this fight anyway so I suppose there's no reason to continue at this time."

"Very well." Sirzechs acknowledged the other three's choices. "But keep this 'Issei' away from my sister. That is a can of worms that none of us need to open right now."

"I'd rather not deal with two Weebs' worth of headaches either. You can keep yours." 'This Issei' grumbled in a dry tone.

"Believe me, I don't want to open it." I replied with a straight face before bowing again.

I escorted Issei out the nearest stadium exit.

For whatever reason, he seemed placated at this turn of events. So much so that he complied without any complaint.

At one point, I thought I heard him mumble something about being touched, but I decided to ignore that and have him sit down in one of the private guest rooms in the stadium. We sat on the nearest couch, and I made sure that the blanket was secure around him.

"Alright, that was a close one back here." I commented, trying my best to sound friendly. "How are you feeling? Anything hurting?"

He didn't answer. Instead, he stared ahead as if he was trying to figure something out.

'Maybe he's thirsty,' I thought, turning to see if there was a place I could find a drink for him.

As I turned to go, though, his hand shot out and latched itself onto my wrist.

I glanced down at him and his exhausted expression was telling me all I needed to know: right now he just needed a friend.

So instead of leaving, I sat down on the couch next to him and waited for what felt like a few minutes before he finally let out a shaky, calming breath.

"I'm too sober for this." He said.

It was quite the understatement. The world was about to shift, and I was caught right in the middle of it.

Back at the stadium, Rias Gremory was still reeling from the spectacle she had just watched (from a safe distance) when she felt a tug on her left sleeve. Turning, she saw her Pawn staring at the arena where the battle had commenced with an indescribable expression on his face.

"Buchou," he said nervously, "Was that… me?"

Kuoh Apartment Complex:

'Well that was something,' thought a middle-aged man with short hair that was half-black and half-blond as he finished watching the feed from the Underworld on his T.V. 'That Sacred Gear is so much like the one wielded by the Red Dragon Emperor and yet different too. Not many could hold out against the Maous for that long with their Gear in just their base form. Human or not.'

His thoughts were interrupted by a white magic circle suddenly appearing in the middle of his apartment before a tall teen with black pants and silver hair materialized into view.

"No, come right on in, who cares if I have pants on." The man said dryly to the newcomer.

"I didn't come here to talk about your wardrobe, Azazel." The teen replied in a flat business-like tone. "I came here to confirm something that an informant of mine passed along just now."

"You mean the one about the four Maous duking it out with a stranger?" Azazel grinned. "A 'human' stranger at that?"

"So it's true then." The teen said with the ghost of a smile coming to his lips. "What have you found on him?"

"Given that this just happened, nothing yet." Azazel replied as he picked up his T.V. remote and rewound the footage. "All I do know is that this guy bears a weird resemblance to one of Rias Gremory's new Pawns, Hyoudou Issei."

"A 'Pawn' wouldn't be able to stand up to four Maous at the same time." The silver-haired teen pointed out. "This human has no Evil Pieces within him. But that gauntlet on his left hand is quite dragon-like."

"If it is a dragon, then do you really think it's capable of taking on Vali Lucifer?" Azazel asked in amusement.

"We'll certainly find out." The now-named Vali replied with a smirk.

They and many others witnessed what happened in the Underworld that day, but no one truly realized just how far things really went.

The Presence of the second Red Dragon Emperor from another world was felt all over, even within the confines of a mysterious plane known as the Dimensional Gap.

Within that realm was a being resembling a short, dark-haired girl who suddenly looked up as she sensed something strange.

"Grandpa," she said silently, though it may as well have been a shout in the silence of the void she inhabited.

Well that didn't take long at all for things to go sideways. Who in the world's behind all this teleporting nonsense and what is their goal, I wonder? Guess we'll find out next chapter, in the meantime feel free to leave a comment or review about what you liked/disliked or if you've got any neat ideas for future chapters. And be sure to check out my book, Plains Riders, on Amazon Kindle and Kindle Unlimited! Do stop in next time as our heroes try to piece together this little mystery. 'Til then.