Afterschool Ass Whooping
Hello everyone and welcome to the latest chapter of I'm Too Sober For This! Took a bit longer than I meant too but I think you'll all find the wait was worth it. Once again I'd like to thank my beta readers: Steeler Steelix, Pyromania101, and Third Fang for their help in editing this chapter. And for those unfamiliar with Karasuba, I'll have a small explanation about her and her training at the end of this chapter. Also, do check out my book, Plains Riders, on Amazon Kindle and Kindle Unlimited! Now then, with no review questions this week, let's jump back into the madness!
Evening: The Hallways of Kuoh Academy
The two dragon emperors stared at each other for several moments, seeming to size each other up.
Karasuba's eyes then moved first, shifting over to Sona with an inquisitive look as the former finally broke the silence which had been permeating the hallway.
"So in your time of perceived crisis," the grey-haired girl began, "When your life potentially hangs in the balance, the one you call upon to protect you is… the worm?" She hung her head for a moment.
But only for a moment before suddenly bursting out laughing. "Oh that's hilarious!" She laughed while gripping her stomach. "It's always the quiet ones, isn't it? I took you for the serious academic type, but you're actually pretty damn funny!"
"This was," Sona managed to speak out, "Actually an accident."
The explanation only made Karasuba laugh harder as she fell to the floor on her back.
"Wouldn't be the first time someone said that about me." Issei sighed as though this was nothing new before giving the laughing teen a double take. "Are you serious?"
Karasuba's laughing fit had evolved into her rolling from one side of the hallway to another and showed no signs of stopping at the moment.
"Perhaps we should leave and hope she passes out from lack of oxygen." Sona suggested, only half-joking given the current state of the person on the floor.
"Doubt it. Fire-breathers like dragons have deceptively large natural hemoglobin ratios in our bloodstream to store extra oxygen. Takes us three times longer than most other species bare-minimum to suffocate, let alone pass out." Again, the alternate Hyoudou's supposed medical background reared its head at an unexpected time.
"No, no, I'm up." Karasuba's laughter subsided as she got back to her feet. "I just wasn't expecting this to be your last line of… hmm, there's something off here."
"Nice of you to finally notice." Issei dryly commented. "What's the Red Dragon Emperor doing at this school?"
"Now there's a real surprise." The grey-haired girl's earlier mirth was replaced with a sneer as her eyes opened slightly. "I never imagined the worm would talk back to me. You're not him, are you?"
"When you say 'worm', I'm guessing you're referring to your brother." Issei deduced tiredly. "No, I'm not him. Through a series of complicated fuckups and 'fuck yous' from a certain trolling vampire, I've found myself yanked out of my world and stuffed into this one like a used dildo. I'm about as welcome as one too, so far. Can't say I'm surprised."
"You're certainly as perverted as the little stain that passes for my brother." Karasuba observed. "But I've got no interest in you. I've come here looking for Emiya Shirou and… are you sure?" That last bit seemed to be directed at someone else entirely as the Sacred Gear holder paused. She seemed to be listening to someone, almost like she had a wireless earpiece on.
After a moment, she sighed before turning her attention back to the duo in front of her. "My Ddraig wants to talk to your Ddraig for a minute. He awake?"
Instead of answering, Issei shrugged before holding up his left hand. A green jewel seemed to grow out of his skin until it covered most of the back of his hand. It glowed as a voice echoed out of it.
"So we wound up meeting my counterpart from this world after all." Ddraig observed. "As much as Issei would like to blame the Sitri heiress for this particular turn of events, I can't say I blame her. Regardless of the reality, the apex of our kind is not to be taken lightly."
Karasuba didn't answer, instead sticking her left hand into her front pocket so that her arm was fully visible. The skin on her forearm split apart and was replaced by red dragon scales that glowed a slightly different shade of green when the entity housed within spoke. "We are dragons." Karasuba's Ddraig declared. "We are terrifying even at our most docile. All who enter our presence should tremble with fear and thank whatever deity they worship when we do not crush them immediately. Why is it that this one can call upon you like some form of lowly guard dog?"
"Our presence here was clearly not intentional." Issei's, or the rather more composed Ddraig replied. "We have only recently determined the dimension-traversing vampire sent us here by some means related to this girl. Why? We do not know yet, but I'm beginning to suspect it has to do with her magnetism to troubling events. You should be as aware as I how peculiar and frustrating those untethered to any one realm can be."
"Why haven't you dealt with her then?" Karasuba's Ddraig, who Issei was now naming Angry Ddraig due to his tone, hissed with fury. "Our binding in this Gear notwithstanding, we are no one's to command! If that girl is an annoyance then devour her!"
'I'm standing right here,' is what Sona would've said under ordinary circumstances. But in this particular instance she was just fine doing her best not to be noticed.
"With what mouth? I'm sure as hell not doing it." Issei deadpanned, not at all intimidated or even affected by Karasuba's dragon radiating murderous intent.
"Calm yourself." Laidback Ddraig told his counterpart in a more patient, even, unsurprised tone. "There is clearly more at work than just a few annoyances easily available to crush. For all we know, the child is the key back to our reality without a repeat of this nonsense, and you should know how vexing those that effortlessly travel between worlds can be. The Maous are already aware of our presence here on top of that, and they are much stronger than the ones we know. Both partner and I are more than capable of fighting them if actually needed, but that would only be a pointless battle with little to gain in our current situation. I would much rather tear and burn the one responsible for this annoying mess than set everything around me alight like some whelp having a tantrum."
"COWARD!" Angry Ddraig exclaimed as energy suddenly poured out of Karasuba's body. "You are the dragon of domination, you laugh at the infinite! Those mere Devils should be fearing for their lives, scrambling to fulfill your every whim to avoid having their civilization reduced to ashes! We have both done so for no less than our own boredom!"
"And look where that got us." Laidback Ddraig replied coolly. "Now we're stuck in some petty decoration that is effortlessly passed around from human to human like a cheap prostitute, and little changes between each iteration when we are awakened. Mere conquest has become dull and repetitive. Contesting with Albion over some feud that transpired so long ago that I have genuinely forgotten it has become embarrassing. My pride remains, of that I assure you, but I have long since realized that rampaging and breathing fire on everything doesn't always solve our problems or reflect what I am. My palette has diversified to desire and appreciate more."
There was a hungry edge to the ending of the otherwise calm dragon's proclamation. A selfish primal declaration that underscored more than what mere words would and should normally convey.
"Humph." Issei let out a knowing and amused snort. Clearly there was more to the statement than what everyone else could gather.
"Or, perhaps you've simply forgotten what it is to truly rampage, to fight!" Angry Ddraig responded. "It seems a little reminder might be in order, Karasuba!"
The grey-haired girl sighed as the scales retreated back into her arm and the dragon's aura retreated.
"You heard him." She added. "Let's go find a place to throw down for a bit."
"They talk about the glory of fighting and yet make us do all the dirty work. I feel like we're the kids of parents in their mid-life crisis trying to relive their younger days through us." Issei huffed. "You're really just gonna do what he says? Can't you just tell him no? He sounds like an asshole."
"You just answered your own question." Issei's Ddraig sighed, somehow rolling the gem on the teen's hand like an eye before it also retracted under flesh. It was abundantly clear this version of Ddraig was nowhere near as heated or even interested in what was to come as the other. If anything, he sounded like the oncoming fight was a foregone conclusion.
"Technically I could," Karasuba affirmed, "But he'll just keep pestering me about it like he pesters me about Albion. It's not like we can get rid of these guys, even if we chop our arms off. And besides, if I take you down in front of the demon girl here, it just might get Emiya's attention."
"You know you say that, but that slasher smile you have screams you just want to fight and or hurt me badly for the sake of it." Issei deadpanned as he noted increased magical energy outside. 'Looks like Shirou's preoccupied with something else at the moment. Best not lead a battle maniac his way and make things more confusing.'
"Just the smile?"
"Fine. Fine. Far be it for me to try and argue out of this with a battle junkie. Guess I'll just start this with an ancient technique of the Joestar family line." Just as Karasuba was about to ask who that was supposed to be, Issei turned and booked it down the hallway. "RUN AWAY!"
"Are you serious!?" Karasuba and Sona both exclaimed before the grey-haired girl gave chase.
Outside the School: A Few Minutes Earlier
"You have me at a disadvantage." I greeted the three newcomers. "I am Emiya Shirou, but I don't know you three."
"That's to be expected." The mage stated matter-of-factly. "The Khaos Brigade has gone to great lengths to conceal our movements, though not for much longer. But to answer your original question, I am Georg, and these are my compatriots, Jeanne and Heracles."
"Pleased to meet you." Jeanne smiled with a wave while Heracles simply grinned while crossing his arms.
"I wish I could say it's a pleasure," I frowned, "But that all depends on why you're here."
"A simple errand." Georg began. "We desire to locate Hyoudou Karasuba. Running into you was not the initial plan but from what I hear you are a strong individual. The type that Hyoudou-san would likely have an interest in."
"You think I know where she might be right now." I surmised. "Sorry, but I don't. Ironically, I was working on finding her myself when you three showed up. Of course, even if I did know, do you really think I'd tell you?"
"I suppose not," Georg admitted, "But that doesn't mean our visit here is entirely wasted. As I explained before, the time for us to hide is drawing to a close. What better way for us to demonstrate our strength then by bringing down the famed Queen of Swords?"
"Seriously? The Khaos Brigade is using that nickname for me too?" I asked with a sigh of frustration. "I really need to have a talk with Sera and Sirzechs about that."
"Don't worry." Jeanne assured as she drew her rapier and stepped forward. "If I beat you, then I can have the Queen of Swords title."
"That's not quite the solution I—" A sudden surge of magical energy drew my attention. My eyes flicked towards the school very briefly as I did my best not to give away that I'd sensed something. Unfortunately, it didn't work.
"Now that's odd." Georg noted. "Is that teleportation magic I'm sensing?"
"That," I pointed out while activating my Magic Circuits and letting the energy flow out from my body, "Is a far more immediate problem than you three. So sorry to say, but I can't really take my time being gentle here."
"Don't hold back on my account." Jeanne giggled while readying her rapier. "I'm stronger than I look."
She wasn't lying, either. As I read the history of her sword I found that her skill wasn't just high, it was on a practically divine scale. That was to be expected of one who housed the spirit of the Maid of Orleans, Jeanne D'arc.
"Remember you said those words." I remarked before projecting a sword I rarely used but found to be quite appropriate. It was a simple longsword with a loose wrapping around its cross-shaped guard that I held in a basic two-handed grip with the blade pointed out to the side. The two of us lowered our stances, analyzing each other for a moment before launching forward at the behest of some unheard signal. Were this a match of skill, I'll admit, Jeanne would probably be a worthy opponent.
Unfortunately for her, this wasn't a match of skill and as our blades met, mine passed through hers as she attempted to parry my blade. I passed by her as she walked forward a couple steps, staring dumbfounded at her now broken rapier. A moment later, a cut appeared on her lower abdomen as she collapsed to the ground. It wasn't a deep wound, but it was more than enough to put her down for the count.
Personally, she should count herself lucky. Most people that encountered the sword of Jeanne d'Arc the Ruler, even a projection of it, didn't usually live to tell the tale. But I didn't have time to focus on that as I advanced towards Heracles next. If he was upset about his comrade's quick loss, or even concerned about it, then he didn't show it.
Instead, he planted his feet and one hand on the ground similar to a football linesman as a manic grin crossed his face. I stopped my approach for a brief instant, dismissing Ruler's sword as I already had another in mind for this situation. In that short span of time when my next weapon began tracing, Heracles' body shined with a golden aura as he charged. It was like watching a mountain-sized cannonball racing towards me as my desired weapon gained form, the weapon of Berserker.
I might've smiled at the irony if the situation had been less serious, but again, I was in a hurry. So using my reinforcement magic on my legs, I spun out of the way of his grasp, shifting the weapon that was longer than I was tall over my head in the same movement and swung.
No sooner had my opponent's feet hit the ground than he was greeted with the full power swing of the original Hercules' special technique: Nine Lives.
Multiple small trenches were torn into the ground as if a giant beast had scratched it with their talons while Heracles was sent flying at a considerable distance, crashing into the trees on the edge of Kuoh Academy's grounds.
I dismissed the massive blade and slowly approached the last remaining member of the Khaos Brigade Trio, Georg, with an unhurried pace.
"I see." He hummed, not seeming to care that his allies were injured. "The weapons you summon aren't just simple magic constructs like the Church or the Devils would use. No, some of them contain incredible power. Power strong enough to best even Sacred Gears in some instances."
"I told you before," I reminded him as I stopped just a few feet away, "I don't have time for this right now. I left your comrades alive but they need medical treatment. If you leave and take them with you, I give you my word I won't try to pursue you."
"You're quite confident in your abilities," Georg noted, "But I'm not like Jeanne and Heracles. My Sacred Gear grants me just a bit more durability, you might say. And I can't help but wonder…" He raised his right hand up with his palm out and rapped on the air behind him as if it were a door. The surface of the air rippled like a lake as space tore open into a void that connected to another area with an incredible amount of magic energy. A few pinpricks of light formed in the air, growing into dozens of magic circles of such intricate detail that I couldn't even begin to decipher them. "…if your store of weapons is enough to handle this?"
He wasn't lying, he was different from his two comrades. The two of them clearly radiated magic power but Georg, I couldn't sense anything from him. Or rather, I sensed nothingness as if his whole body was connected to a void. The same could be said of the magic circles he was using. Instead of being charged by him, it was as if they were being fed by the void that he was connected to, filling them up almost instantly.
They began to spin in mid-air as the built-up energy was ready to be unleashed. "Now, let's see if your sword technique can deflect—"
CRASH!
Georg stopped speaking as a weapon came streaking through the air, destroying one of his magic circles. This seemed to confuse the magic wielder for a moment as he glanced at the now empty space in the air.
A few more weapons materialized out of nowhere and shot towards another section of magic circles, destroying them as well. Georg understood what was happening as he attempted to give the command to fire to his remaining circles. But no sooner did he try that than dozens of bladed weapons flew through the air and assaulted his mystical phalanx. In short order, the myriad of colors that had hung above Georg's head were wiped out before I closed the distance.
Any other attempted movement he tried to make was instantly halted as I traced and held a red-bladed spear up to his face. It was one I was intimately familiar with, especially given that I'd actually been stabbed by it once. The spear of Cú Chulainn that carries a curse to reverse causality, Gae Bolg. Its power was such that wounds inflicted by it would never heal so long as the spear remained in this world, making it effectively an immortal killer in a sense.
And Georg must've sensed this instinctively as sweat broke out across his face and forehead. "You have such a weapon." He managed to stutter out. "A weapon capable of killing immortals?"
"No," I corrected coolly, "I have 'weapons' capable of killing immortals. Just like I have weapons to nullify magic, bypass armor, and even some that can be used against dragons."
"I guess that means it wasn't a fluke then." Georg admitted nervously. "You really did bring Sirzechs to his knees with your abilities. There were more than a few that doubted that within the Khaos Brigade."
"Now you can tell them otherwise." I stated while pointing the spear closer to his face. "Immortality lost its meaning nineteen years ago. That's the only reason you three are leaving with your lives today. Bring that message to your leader and let him know what awaits him should he really be so foolish as to wage war with the Underworld."
"Well," Georg adjusted his glasses, "I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. We'll be on our way then." He lifted his foot and stomped lightly on the ground. Much like what had happened with the air, the ground rippled like a pond after a stone had been thrown in. I instinctively leapt back, anticipating a possible attack but relaxed a moment later when I realized the ripple stopped at Jeanne's unconscious form while also traveling back to where Heracles had landed.
Then, they all began sinking into the ground as if it had turned into quicksand. "It was a pleasure meeting you, Emiya Shirou, I'll be sure to pass your message along." And just like that, he was gone and the ripple in the ground disappeared as if it had never been there. I let out a breath as I dismissed the spear.
"At least that problem's taken care of." I muttered under my breath before remembering something exceptionally important. "Shit, Sona!"
I rushed towards the school, flinging open the door I saw her go towards before racing down the hall and up the nearest flight of stairs. I was personally glad I'd memorized the layout of the school and knew exactly which room I was looking for.
"SONA!"
I yelled upon reaching the floor.
The good news was I found her. She was standing in the hallway clearly a bit shaken, but otherwise seemed to be okay. She also seemed to be very confused until the sound of her name broke her from her trance.
"Wha... Shirou." The Sitri heiress drawled as she visibly relaxed. "You're alright."
"I'm the one who should be saying that to you. What in the world happened here? I felt you activate the Second Magic again."
"I didn't mean to," Sona began, "But she was here, Shirou, Hyoudou Karasuba was in the school. I don't know if she followed us or was waiting for us or—"
"We can worry about what she was doing here later." I stopped her before she could go any further. It was clear that, despite her best efforts, Sona was still pretty nervous. "Just tell me what happened and where she went?"
"Oh it's such a mess." She wrapped her hands on her head. "I got scared when I saw her and that damn teleportation magic activated. Now Hyoudou Issei, the perverted Red Dragon Emperor, is playing cat-and-mouse with his sister from another world—our Red Dragon Emperor!"
"Shit." I couldn't help but swear. "But we've still got a little time. Tell me which way they went and I'll take care of Karasuba."
Sona pointed down the hallway to a broken window at the very end.
'Well, that's a start at least.' I thought before reinforcing my legs and rushing towards the newly created exit. Let's hope they haven't gotten too far because I still suck at flying.
The Forest Around Kuoh Academy
"We should be far enough now." Karasuba called behind Issei. "You can stop pretending like you need to run away!"
"Counter proposal." Issei called back. "We both pretend we never saw each other, I go back to watching porn and you go back to whatever the fuck it is you do when you're not trying to pick a fight with anything and everything that has a pulse."
"I don't just start fights whenever I feel like it." Karasuba retorted. "Unlike some people, I have standards."
"I don't watch lame basement porn I find on the internet!" Issei shot back. "I am a certified elite-tier porn critic such that some of the best producers in the world, and Underworld, have requested my approval and review! My commissions come at a premium! I have a backlog… oh FUCK, my backlog! It's going to take forever to get through it all when I get back!"
"Yeah because it's so hard to sit at a laptop for hours and write about how hard you bust a nut!" The grey-haired girl mocked, though she was slightly annoyed over the fact that Issei was more worried about his supposed backlog than his current situation.
"I don't masturbate!" The otherworlder yelled on instinct as they continued to zigzag through the trees within the blink of an eye.
"You're still an unmotivated little shit." Karasuba spat. "You have a Sacred Gear and all you can think to do with it is enhance your porn-viewing ability. I bet you're still stupid enough to think that 'harems' are in any way 'awesome'!"
That comment got a reaction as Issei suddenly stopped running, digging his right foot into the ground and sliding for several feet before stopping.
"You really just had to push it, didn't you?" The Sekiryuutei asked with a vastly calmer tone to his pursuer, who stopped a few feet away.
Karasuba opened her mouth to reply, only for the words in her mouth to halt momentarily as the colossal beast in the back of the cave lifted its head and turned its attention to her. It was not impressed.
By the time she blinked her eyes and shook her head to get the image out of her head, she realized that Issei was looking at her dead in the eyes, clearly unamused.
He didn't seem to take note of her brief moment of distraction. "You want a fight that bad, fine, just don't whine like that Fallen Angel I gave a bad review to when you find your own performance lacking."
"You're the expert on bitching." Karasuba sneered as a nodachi sword seemed to basically appear in her right hand. "That's a fact that seems to be the same between you and my brother."
"And you and my world's Vali have something in common." Issei calmly stated as he summoned his Boosted Gear on his left arm in a blink of an eye. "You need to learn to pick your fights better."
Karasuba instantly noted the different appearance of the other Boosted Gear, with the spring-like coils running down its plated length and the near instantaneous speed it came out at. It wasn't concerning so much as it was different.
That said, the prospect of smacking the worm around in one form or another was too enticing of a prospect to ignore. Smirking, she raised her sword over her head. But in the short moment she readied her stance, Issei warped to right in front of her with his hand barely an inch from her stomach.
[Boost!]
Karasuba's Sacred Gear interrupted him as he found his fingers now swiping at empty air. The reason being his opponent was now a couple feet further back than she'd been before, a perfect distance to bring her sword down.
'Did she just…' Issei thought as he leapt back.
[Cancel!]
The distance shrunk back to normal and the blade, which had just been about to miss, left a cut on Issei's chest as his momentum carried him the rest of the way back.
'Interesting.' The otherworlder thought in mild annoyance at best while his wound began to glow and stitch itself back together. 'She learned she can Boost space and then return it to normal. I guess she really can fight after all. Might want to see if I can do that too later. Must be taxing though, Sacred Gear or not. Manipulating the raw space of the world is a bitch to pull off right, much less maintain.'
"You use white magic." Karasuba observed. "Good, that means you won't get put down by shallow wounds. This might be fun after all."
"Not really." Issei scratched his head with his right hand, paying little mind to the quickly healing wound on his chest. The dull bored look in his eyes had not changed in the slightest. "It just means I'm not going to be hurt when I put you down and you finally tone down your shit."
"Don't keep a girl waiting!" Karasuba chirped as she launched herself forward with a horizontal strike.
Issei then moved back just far enough to avoid it, and easily ducked the follow up strike.
He backed up with a nonchalant look while dodging the next couple of diagonal strikes by leaning his body out of the path of the weapon.
He turned on his heel to avoid a thrust which carried his opponent past him before dodging her back kick.
When she came in with another strike aimed at his neck, he deftly caught it with his left hand.
Chack. Chack.
The coil on his Sacred Gear and a flash of the gem on his left hand signaled that he had Boosted the sword beyond its limits in some way as it had shattered an instant later.
"I'm not into inter-dimensional incest." Issei stated in a dead and unamused tone as though he wasn't fighting for his life in the slightest. "And I'll—" He had to jump back as another nodachi was swung at his head.
"Don't bother destroying my weapon. I've got more than I know what to do with already." Karasuba pointed her blade directly at Issei. He felt the power of her Boosted Gear spike for a moment before moving his head out the way. It was none too soon as he felt some of his hair get sliced off by a now much longer blade, then dodged to his left as the blade was brought down where he'd just been standing. "And I'm quite adept at using it in conjunction with my Sacred Gear."
"And Bleach is your favorite fucking manga." He dryly remarked. "Seriously, it all makes sense now. You're actually Gin Ichimaru's secret love-child."
"Even if I was, I love the parents I have now." Karasuba retorted. "What about you? Get along with yours?"
Issei frowned deeply before closing his eyes and breathing deeply through his nose and mouth to calm himself down.
Karasuba took the opportunity to strike again, only to freeze as he held up his left hand, this time not radiating with white magic, but arcing with light magic.
Not in an attack, but his fingers in a snapping gesture.
Snap!
[Boost!]
BANG!
Once again, space was expanded around the grey-haired girl as she retreated from the overwhelmingly bright and loud improvised flashbang spell that sounded more like a bolt of lightning than a concussive explosion. A cheap but effective trick worthy of a clown that does nothing but run aw—
An unforgiving claw the size of barricades came down upon her like an avalanche.
"Shit!" Relying on her instincts more than her recovering eyes and ears, Karasuba leapt back while slashing out with her sword as fast as she could.
Wham!
"Ngh!" She slammed her back hard into a tree that she didn't notice in her hasty retreat.
"Pay attention, you oblivious child. He fooled your senses to play you like a fool. He has not moved from his spot!" The enraged dragon in her arm hissed in indignation.
Indeed, as her eyes and ears cleared up, Karasuba noticed that Issei had not taken a step from earlier. In fact, the only things that he had moved were the coil around his Boosted Gear coiling and uncoiling at a steady pace, and a freshly arched eyebrow as though to express his mild amusement in her embarrassing mistake.
"You wanted to play." He stated simply as though it was the most obvious thing in the world, tilting his head to the side as though playing innocent. "Well? I'm having fun."
Oh.
Oh the worm did not just say that to her face.
She didn't even bother to blink the spots out of her eyes before pointing her sword at him and extending it to run him through instantly in a single seamless movement.
Unfortunately for her, Issei didn't seem surprised in the slightest, leaping over her strike and adjusting his body in midair to avoid the extending blade. He pushed off it, shattering it with his Boost before landing back on the ground.
Karasuba already had another sword ready which she extended again, only this time as a slash. The long blade cut through the wood of the trees around them as if they weren't even there, nullifying the normal disadvantage of wielding a long weapon in a cramped space.
Issei ducked, jumped and dodged around the numerous blows until a good portion of the forest around and slightly behind him was reduced to little more than a huge mess of woody debris.
'Great.' Issei thought as the attacks suddenly ceased. 'This much damage in less than a minute. I'm probably going to get the blame for this. Should've gotten further away before letting the fight start. Probably still should now.'
Though before he could do that, he'd need to locate his opponent. Somehow she'd moved out of view in the middle of his last dodge and now he couldn't sense her. All of her killing intent was being concealed and even her magic was undetectable.
Actually, that wasn't quite right. He remembered something from his conversation with Shirou down in the Underworld before he left.
Apparently, in this world, the Hyoudou family had practically no magic in their lineage at all. It was some kind of genetic defect and the main reason why they'd been unable to identify Karasuba or her brother as possessing Sacred Gears for so long. In most cases, that would be a problem for someone stepping into a world full of mystical opponents. But for someone who'd mastered their Sacred Gear to a high degree there was one advantage: opponents used to sensing magic wouldn't be able to find them.
Not that he was in much of a better boat. He just had shit affinity to magic in general outside of fire magic, and his reserves weren't impressive either. Every spell and branch of craft he wanted to practice outside of fire he more or less had to "Rock Lee" it to show any gains.
Thank you bullshit Boosted Gear experience amplification over years of training. Now he was proudly barely above average in White and Lightning magic despite his next to zero affinity to either.
That said, his theoretical knowledge in magic… was notably less restricted.
'It's fine.' He thought. 'Let her play her cat-and-mouse game. Stretching this out only plays to my favor anyways.'
A sudden spike of energy and rippling in reality was his only warning as Issei moved his head out of the way just in time for his opponent's blade to go shooting by his head. It retracted almost immediately afterwards, so he couldn't touch it, not that it would've made a huge difference anyway.
Another attack came from the massive dust cloud around him and then another after that.
'One, two.' He tilted his head to the side to not get impaled.
'One, two.' He swayed his chest and leaned back to keep his heart without a hole.
'One, two.' His hips swayed to protect his kidneys.
Keeping track of time was a natural instinct for any and all experienced wielders of the Boosted Gear and Divine Dividing. The ten-second limit between individual charges was a detail that they always needed to keep track of exactly since their lives genuinely depended on it more often than not. Especially when fighting one another.
As was the basic math involving the "two powers" table.
'The typical nodachi's around two meters long. And the distance from the dust is around five before it hides everything. Two Boosts is more than enough to cover the gap.' He absently mused as he spun around another strike. 'A Boost a second. Not bad. She's a crazy bitch, but it takes more than talent to naturally break the ten second limiter on the Boosted Gear in the base state… ah.'
He almost faltered as the expected attack after two seconds didn't come and messed with his dance-like tempo, almost leading to him losing his legs below the knees as a swipe came from below. Fortunately, a quick hop and Boost combo of his own got him over it without issue. 'Looks like she's finally switching it up.'
Issei continued to evade the strikes from his concealed opponent, no longer finding any consistent interval or pattern to them. Even the two-second gap was no longer viable as she sometimes kept the blade long for a follow-up swipe after the first.
And yet his expressionless, near bored expression never changed.
'I could taunt her and trick her into revealing her location.' The Sekiryuutei idly mused while ducking under another attempt to decapitate him. 'Or just leave the area and head somewhere that she can't hide. Either way, it's getting to be about time to end this.'
Strangely, about the same time he thought, this was also the longest pause in his opponent's attacks.
Issei scanned his surroundings while bouncing on his feet, using his enhanced dragon senses to try and locate his opponent by smell this time, a byproduct of replacing his entire respiratory system with that of a dragon's early in his training, unlike, say, his arm. It didn't take long for him to catch her scent along with something else: the scent of fire.
Looking up, he saw Karasuba had jumped quite a distance in the air with her mouth open. A small flame was in front of her mouth, rapidly growing in size and intensity.
Certainly her magic was minuscule, but with the power of the Boosted Gear, it could be Boosted to incredible heights. In this case, it allowed her to unleash this powerful attack:
"DRAGON SHOT!"
It had grown to an enormous size by this point, close to the flame dragon Issei was able to manifest, and it moved fast.
Chack. Chack.
The coil around his left arm pumped itself once again. "Wrong move."
The massive sphere of flame impacted right on top of Issei and detonated like a military grade bomb, releasing a blast that scorched the entire area around them for at least a hundred feet if not more. The heat was intense and immolated everything in the vicinity indiscriminately.
Or at least Issei assumed that was the intent as he stood in the center of it all as though nothing was happening.
Funny thing about abstract traits like fire resistance. You could actually Boost it endlessly with next to no consequences or feedback so long as you also increased your organs' raw heat tolerance for good measure. Even standing on the Sun wasn't a problem so long as things like breathing weren't a factor.
Not that fire resistance was the only thing he had amplified in himself over the past minute.
Chack. Chack.
The coil discharged once again, pumping itself like a shotgun.
Nervous system. Neural system. Synapse response. Structural durability. Flexibility. Lactic acid half-life. Calorie processing. Systemic circulatory system. Pulmonary circulatory system. The human body was a cornucopia of functions and processes, and while a single Boost of the Boosted Gear and Twice Critical did conveniently amplify ALL of them, that also included the more detrimental ones that sapped energy with meaningless results.
What need was strength to someone that could simply overcharge or debilitate a target with a simple touch?
Boosting everything at once was horrifyingly inefficient to someone with a medical background and access to a repository of trillions of Boosts on a normal day.
When Issei boosted parts of himself, it was with dozens of individual charges at once. Bare minimum.
He was essentially micromanaging what he enhances in order to minimize his stamina drain.
That said, the biggest flaw with the approach was that he could only apply the overwhelming amplifications to one target at a time. It took a while to get through the whole batch.
But the results spoke for themselves as the attack ended and Issei remained in the middle of the inferno completely untouched.
And he had just finished.
He looked up at the now descending Karasuba. If she was surprised that he'd withstood the attack, she didn't show it, instead angling her body to bring her blade down on him as she continued falling.
If this was a normal fight, it would be over already.
But words had been said. And the pecking order needed to be made explicitly clear.
"My turn to play." Issei looked at her impassively.
Halfway through her downward strike, Karasuba realized he was barely a foot in front of her instead of on the ground.
The sword in her hands shattered like glass.
"I told you that won't—!" She snarled as another blade materialized in her grasp and—shattered as though it was the most brittle thing in the world.
She had barely seen his hand move.
The air above the crater was decorated with shards of metal as Karasuba tried seven more times to rearm herself, only for each weapon to shatter apart in her hand not even a second later without any effort.
She tried to Boost herself to the ground and escape, however before she could get a feeling for the floor beneath her feet, Issei was once again right in front of her face, the madness of an annoyed beast far greater than she focused on her entire being.
"Get away you perverted little—!" Her attempt to swipe at him with a new sword while Boosting the space between them was cut short as he grabbed her scale-covered left arm with his right, wrenched it above her head, and refused the whelp's bending of the world.
Karasuba could confidently say that she had never seen or experienced a Boost itself actually break, much less around her as her attempt to attack and retaliate failed spectacularly and caused everything from the ground to the air in their vicinity to literally crack.
For the briefest of moments, she thought she even saw a tiny sliver of the Dimensional Gap before the ruptures in the world fixed itself an instant later.
"The game is over, Gin-chan." He stated in a flat tone as he hit her stomach with his free left hand.
Karasuba's eyes widened in surprise that was quickly replaced with pain as she felt her opponent's white magic course through her body. For a split second, it was like receiving a grievous injury before having it mending back together again while simultaneously spreading fire throughout her nervous system. The grey-haired girl barely even noticed when she was dropped to the ground in a heap while Issei sighed and walked a few steps away from her.
"Agh." She groaned and hissed as the burning sensation in her ebbed away, but noticed that she couldn't move. "What did you do?"
"Bit of white magic. Bit of Ki. Bit of generic biology bullshit. It isn't permanent, but you won't be able to move for a bit. Or use your Sacred Gear." Issei shrugged vaguely.
"Well that's… annoying." Karasuba grunted as she stubbornly forced herself to roll upwards so that she could see the victor of the bout more easily. She hated to admit it, but she had been played with the entire time. "All that noise and Emiya didn't show up."
"Please don't tell me you're the kind of freak that let yourself get injured just so you could talk to Shirou." Issei questioned with a grimace.
"No, you beat me." Karasuba freely admitted. "Usually, it's only the monkey that can manage to one-shot me. How did you keep me from distorting space, anyway?"
"A trick I picked up from an asshole." Issei explained. "Stops most direct methods of screwing with my time-space. And other things. Doesn't prevent that annoying teleporting the Enabler's pulling off. That or I'm more rusty than I thought."
"Hmm." Karasuba mused from her position on the ground.
"My turn to ask a question: why did you decide to become a battle hungry maniac? Do you really think you have to fight Vali just because that cranky prick wants you to? The idiot's just desperate to relive his glory days in whatever kid he comes across. It's a waste of time in the long run."
Karasuba's response to this was to laugh mockingly as if she'd just been asked a ridiculous question. "A waste of time." She repeated when her laughter finally subsided. "You clearly didn't think it was a waste of time when you went and got as powerful as you are now. Don't you know the fighting doesn't just stop when you reach the top? When you become the guy to beat, then everyone wants a piece of you."
"And are you trying to become the one at the top?" Issei questioned further. "There's nothing up there but insane homeless people that do nothing but pick fights with the other insane homeless people ad nauseam. No one ever does anything productive when they do get up there other than keep their fellow crazies in check. It's a pointless goal that stops short of anything actually worthwhile or new."
"It doesn't matter whether I want to or not." Karasuba revealed with a hint of pity. "Perhaps the friends in each of your arms forgot to mention this but Sacred Gear holders are not destined to lead very happy lives. Us dragon emperors especially have hard lives, given that our very existence draws in other supernatural beings. So our choices boil down to fighting or dying. Given the look in your eyes and the fact that you're asking that question, though, I can't help but wonder if you thought you could get out of whatever tragedy befell you without fighting as hard as you could?"
The ground cracked several feet as Issei's Presence flared again, this time clearly meant for intimidation as he fully looked at Karasuba. "You don't know a damn thing." He growled quietly.
"I'll take that as a yes." She sneered, then gave an unimpressed snot when the pressure increased. "Oh cut out the theatrics. You'll scare away the one I'm waiting on."
"Then I hope you like speaking to him from a box."
One Minute Later
'Can't believe they got this far in the time it took me to get up the stairs and talk to Sona.' I thought as I finally arrived at the site of an apparent battle. I say "apparent" because I was surprised the rest of the forest was still standing despite the large crater and mass of wooden debris all over the place. Given how terrified everyone was of two Red Dragon Emperors clashing, I expected a lot more damage.
"Oh, you finally made it." The familiar voice of Issei was heard as I caught sight of him, sitting on a box of all things and reading… a book on advanced applied multi-dimensional theory?
"Issei," I began, "What in the world happened to Karasuba?"
A sudden rustling noise was my answer as said girl's voice emerged from the box. "In here." She called. "And is that Emiya Shirou?"
I quirked an eyebrow as my suspicions had indeed been confirmed. Hyoudou Karasuba, the Red Dragon Emperor of our world, was currently stuffed in the box that the otherworld Issei was sitting on.
"You won't try slicing either of us up if I say yes, will you?" I questioned. Issei seemed pretty confident in that box's integrity, but I wasn't planning on letting my guard down until I knew for sure we weren't going to have a fight on our hands.
"My body is a little sluggish right now." Karasuba answered from within the box. "I'll have to take a raincheck on dismembering you if that's alright?"
"Please, extend that raincheck as long as you like." I deadpanned before shifting my gaze to the other Boosted Gear holder. "Are you alright?"
"She caught me off guard once, but it was no big deal. She's the one in the box in the end." Issei shrugged carelessly as he drank from a water bottle he'd pulled out of nowhere while still reading the book. "But she still wants to fight you though for whatever reason."
"You two can work on figuring that out." Karasuba scoffed. "Can't go blabbing all of my secrets before a big date."
I let out a sigh at that. It looked like losing didn't deter her one bit.
"Sounds like you aren't roughed up too bad, Karasuba." I observed.
"Oh please." She almost laughed. "This isn't the first time I got shoved into a box after getting one-shotted. I was trained by a monkey, after all."
Wait, he one-shotted her?
"She's almost as incorrigible as the Vali back in my world." Issei sighed, just as blasé about the situation as Karasuba was. "I can show you how to house-train her if you want. It'll cost you a bit in international shipping though."
"That's alright." I interrupted quickly so I didn't have to hear the details. "I already got a plan of my own. I'm going to—"
RING! RING!
"Oh hold on, that's mine." Karasuba interjected as she answered her cellphone. What followed was an obvious conversation between parent and child as it turned out the one calling was none other than Karasuba's mother. We simply waited patiently until the conversation ended with a resounding 'fine' from the grey-haired girl. "Okay, so Emiya, it seems you've been invited over for dinner." As one might expect, Karasuba's mother was not the type to take 'no' for an answer.
Issei paused, looked down at the box, and then up at me. "... I'm not carrying her."
And that was how I genuinely became afraid of Karasuba for the first time.
I am the Kara in the box! Sorry, couldn't resist the song reference. Now before I forget, I promised some info. For those who don't know, Karasuba is based off the character of the same name from the anime Sekirei, at least according to Fahad's author notes. She was also trained by Sun Wukong, or the monkey as she likes to call him, from a young age after her sacred gear awakened. Obviously there's a bit more to tell but I don't want to give away too much at this point. So in the meantime feel free to leave a comment or review about what you liked/disliked or if you've got any neat ideas for future chapters. Don't forget to check out my book, Plains Riders, on Amazon Kindle and Kindle Unlimited either! Finally, be sure to stop in next time as Shirou adds a new member to his peerage! 'Til then.