(July 9th, 2024)
I laid in bed until about eleven o'clock. I had to sleep in since my ears were ringing when I was trying to go to sleep last night. Even though the biker bar mission was a success, I don't find myself wanting to go back to a biker bar. I'm more of a Cafe de Springfield kind of cabbit. I sat up feeling like my usual happy self, but then I remembered what I did last night. I brutally murdered someone… and rage is the only reason I can give you as to why I did it. I hate what I did and why I did it. I felt like I was being eaten alive by guilt, so I made myself get out of bed. I sauntered down the hallway into the living room, where I saw the King playing video games on his vintage-looking box tv. Yu was sitting in an armchair in the corner. He saw me right away.
"Good morning, Brother." Yu said with a smile. The King paused his game and looked at me.
"Good morning, Mah boi." The King greeted me. "I trust you slept well."
"Once I actually got to sleep, I suppose I did." I answered. My stomach then growled since I didn't eat much yesterday.
"OAH!" The King interjected. "You need breakfast. Go to the kitchen and get a bowl of Munf-Munf cereal!" The King went back to his game as I headed to the kitchen. I was hungry. I felt a tap on my shoulder, so I turned to see Yu shaking his head 'no' violently.
"Do NOT eat the cereal." Yu whispered. "It is terrible."
"What am I supposed to eat?" I whispered back. Yu led me to the fridge.
"Just drink a bottle of ketchup straight. It's not that appetizing, but it's better than the King's cereal." Yu said with a frown. Just then the King came into the kitchen.
"OAH, mah boi, what are you doing with the bottle of ketchup?" The King asked. "Allow me to pour you a bowl of cereal." The King then motioned me to take a seat at the table, then he whipped up a bowl of cereal and slid it across the table to me. He stared at me with an excited look in his eyes.
"Don't keep it in your mouth for too long." Yu whispered to me. "Just swallow it as soon as it hits your tongue." I took a bite of cereal, and despite Yu's warning and my high suspicion, I allowed myself to taste it because I was just that curious. Yu had a look of dread as the spoon full of cereal made a crash course towards my mouth. The cereal was actually pretty good, it tasted like donut glaze… at first. Suddenly I was pierced by a taste that matched the sickening smell of a bathroom that was just used by someone who ate something that didn't agree with them… and then it was snowed on by what seemed to be the texture of skin flakes. That left me sitting there with the feeling that my throat was closing in a hopeful yet futile effort to stop the cereal from traversing further down my belly.
"How delicious did you think it was, mah boi?" The King asked me. I shakily held up a thumbs up as my mouth was still hanging open uncontrollably. The King looked pleased with himself. "See? Munf-Munf is delicious after all! I don't know what the FDA was thinking when they banned it." That only horrified me even more. I started worrying about my health. I thought breakfast would make me feel better…. It didn't.
—-
Yu and I ended up sitting on the couch watching the King play video games until around two in the afternoon. I was starting to get worried about Suomi since she hadn't gotten up yet. I knew she got sick last night, so I figured I should go check on her.
"Where are you headed?" Yu asked me calmly.
"I'm gonna go check on Suomi, see how she's doing." I answered.
"Bring her a glass of water!" Yu suggested. That was a good idea, so I got a glass of water and headed to the room Yu and I brought Suomi to, since she had passed out last night while we were chatting after dinner. I knocked on the door softly.
"Suomi? Are you awake?" I asked softly.
"Yeah… I'm up…" Suomi answered, still sounding very tired. I slowly opened the door. Suomi used her hand to shield her face from the light. "Could you close the door please? The light is making my headache worse."
"I brought you some water." I said quietly as I closed the door slowly. I brought her the water and she chugged it in a matter of seconds.
"Thanks Klonoa." She said as she was breathing heavily. "I'm sorry if I got a little tipsy during the mission, I just can't control myself around Koskenkorva."
"It's ok, there's nothing wrong with liking a beverage. Just try not to drink so much that you get a headache." I warned Suomi.
"Headache… dizziness, nausea, dry mouth…" Suomi moaned as she sat up a little bit. Wow, I should really watch how much juice I drink from this point on. I don't want to get all of that.
"Do you think you'll feel good enough later this evening to take the small town The King was talking about?" I asked Suomi.
"Small… town?" Suomi questioned with her head tilted. I suppose it makes sense that she wouldn't remember the conversation last night. After all, she was really tired after the bar fight.
"The King told us about a small resistance group hiding in a basement in a town that's under Neptune's control." I explained. "The plan is to go free the town and introduce ourselves, but I want to do it when you feel completely better."
"I think I should be okay in a bit. The water really helped, though. Thank you." Suomi said softly, giving a satisfied smile.
"Want me to get you some more?" I asked.
"I think I'll be ok." Suomi said. "You're really sweet for asking though." Suomi opened her arms for a hug, so I jumped right in. "Am I missing anything?"
"Yu and I are just watching the King play some sort of game where you run around and rob banks." I answered. "So not much. Anyway, I'll let you rest a bit more." As I headed to the door, I remembered some very crucial information. "By the way, Suomi… DON'T eat the cereal." Suomi looked at me with her head tilted again.
—-
Well, it was definitely more than "a bit" as Yu and I sat on the couch watching the King play this game called 'Great Theft Automatic,' or something like that. The game was about running around the city shooting people in the streets, robbing banks, stealing cars, you name it. You can even go to this really pink place where women take their clothes off. If I don't get a grip on myself… I'm worried that perhaps that will be me. I'm not worried about myself throwing money at bikini ladies, though. I sat there for a long time with my eyes glued to the TV while feeling a fear wash over me… A fear of myself. Yu nudged me softly and waved his hand in front of my face
"You ok, Brother?" Yu asked in a hushed tone. "You seem a little out of it."
"I'm fine." I answered while trying to sound normal. The King's brow furrowed in response.
"Want to play a little bit, mah boi?" The King asked with his controller-holding hand extended out to me. I obliged. The game was so lifelike. I could walk around the streets and give people compliments! They also had this really cool gun store I could look around in, and there was this one point where I was driving around in a car I bought from the store and at one point there was a woman standing on the side of the road needing a ride.
"I wouldn't pick her up…" Yu warned me.
"She needs to get somewhere, I should help her out." I retorted. The woman in the game wanted to go to a secluded place for some reason, then I got the option to pay her money. I figured giving her some money towards bus fare or something would be most helpful to her, after all I was pretty rich in the game. I gave her seventy-five dollars, then for some reason she sat on my lap and started moving up and down in my lap.
"What is she doing?" I asked in confusion.
"Did you ever receive 'the talk?'" Yu asked me.
"OAH! Mah boi, prostitutes are what all true warriors strive for!" The King said with his index finger sticking up.
"What the perkele did you just say?!" I turned to see Suomi standing in the hallway staring daggers at the King. She still looked a little bit wobbly.
"You ready to head out, Suomi?" Yu asked, sounding like he was trying to change the subject.
"Very much so." Suomi said without hesitation.
"OAH-HO!" The King said in excitement. "I have two things I want to offer you before you go! Follow me." The King got off the couch and headed towards the garage, so we followed him. When we got to the garage, the King pointed to a giant orange SUV.
"Whoa, that car is a beauty!" Yu exclaimed. He started to inspect the car from every angle while the King tossed me the car keys.
"You can take my car." The King said nicely. "You'll also be happy to know that mah boi Link will be accompanying you."
"Does he know how to use a weapon?" Suomi asked, still sounding at least somewhat tired.
"OAH, yes! Link has gotten great at the crossbow!" The King said excitedly. A crossbow will be perfect! It's quiet, accurate and it has great range. Only drawback is the fact that the user will have to get close in order to retrieve his ammunition. The King then poked his head back into the castle. "Link, mah boi! Come down to the garage, please." Link then came running and tumbling down the hallway and into the garage.
"What's up?" Link greeted.
"Mah boi, go get your crossbow. You will be helping these three begin the war against the infernal Neptune." The King informed Link.
"Great! I can't wait to snipe some simps!" Link said as he pumped his fist. The King then turned to me.
"Don't worry, Mah boi is a true warrior." The King said with confidence. "Contact me when you have freed the town, and I will send Fari over to pick Link up."
"I will do just that." I said as Yu and Suomi were getting into the car. "Hey, thank you so much for helping us out and giving us a place to sleep."
"This war must be won, mah boi." The King said as he put his hand on my shoulder. "I am happy to see other true warriors fighting the evil forces of Neptune. Anything else you need, I will be sure to aid you."
—-
We had been in the car for about an hour, and I have to say; this is the nicest car I've ever been in. I already love road trips with Yu and Suomi, but this car…? It's like someone put a mansion on wheels! It is so spacious, everything has a really smooth wooden finish and the seats are amazingly comfortable. At some point I want to just take a super long road trip with just the three of us. I mean Link is okay, but he's just kinda… eccentric, shall we say. Link will jump like a squirrel when he sees something that interests him, he'll randomly ask me if I want to fight the forces of evil in CWCistan, which I always answer 'yes' to, and at one point he asked Suomi for a kiss! He said it was for "luck" or something? I don't want to come across as judgy, but I'm not overly fond of Link. Anyway, we finally got close to this small town. We left the car and then walked the rest of the way, since we didn't want to draw attention to ourselves, and began getting the lay of' the land. Yu scouted the town using his scoped M14.
"This isn't working, I'm not getting a good view." Yu whispered. That was when I noticed there was a really tall building in the town.
"I know what we can do." I whispered back. "We can get you onto that roof in the corner of the town, then you'll be able to guide us through the town."
"That roof is way too high. The only way I'm getting on top of one is from the inside." Yu informed us. I stood there for a moment. I rubbed my head and suddenly then had an idea. It was a complicated plan, but if the three of us worked together, we could get it done. Link could have been a detriment to us three, since I didn't really trust him at that point. The first part of the plan would rely on Suomi.
—-(KP-31 Suomi)-(Step 1: bring us a uniform)-
Klonoa told me to find a store in town and acquire a burka so I could look like a civilian. I had to leave my konepistooli with Klonoa, Narukami and Link because civilians in that town apparently weren't allowed to carry weapons. I hid a knife in my shoe, because rules are made to be broken, as I always say! I also had to take off my coat because I'd surely pass out from the heat. None the matter, I was ready to bring back victory! Anyway, I couldn't get noticed by any guards, because I wasn't sure whether or not they would know who I was. I wanted to make sure I didn't fail. I got a few judgemental looks when I walked past civilians, because I'm pretty sure girls aren't allowed to wear skirts and tank tops around here. I kept looking around for some kind of store, and I eventually found one. I went in, but realized it was a flower store.
"Excuse me, can I help you?" I heard someone ask me. The owner of the store was a short blonde girl who wore a pink crop top over a long sleeve green shirt. I thought it was pretty interesting that she wasn't wearing a burka or anything of the sort.
"Actually, you can." I answered. She seemed nice enough, definitely not coming off as one of Chris's guards. "Is there anywhere around here I can get a burka? I'm new here, and I want to… you know… cover up." I motioned from my head to my skirt.
"Oh yeah, some people around here can give some pretty bad looks to a girl who doesn't wear a burka… not that I'd ever wear one." The girl causally answered. "There's a store that sells some about five doors down. When you walk out of my shop, just take a left. The store has a big yellow faded sign, it's hard to miss."
"Thank you so much!" I got my answer and was all set to continue the mission.
"Wait… you said you're new here?" The girl said as she came out from behind the counter. "Want to come for dinner sometime? I can make pasta or something." The girl seemed very outgoing. I think it would be enjoyable to spend time with her.
"That sounds like fun. I'll drop by when I'm free." I said.
"I can't wait. My name is Dew, by the way." She stood there smiling.
"I'm Suomi. I have to go now, but I'll see you around, Dew!" She gave me a friendly nod. I poked my head out the door to look around. I didn't need any trouble with anyone… For now. Klonoa's entire plan rests on my shoulders right now and I would not accept defeat!
"This is my duty." I whispered to myself. It looked clear enough, so I went out and hugged the buildings. A few guards came around a corner and I felt stunned. I made myself continue on with a steely but scared resolve, knowing if I stopped like a deer in headlights, that would make my situation worse. They walked past me keeping their eyes on me. I could see it through my peripheral vision. I turned a corner just so I could watch without looking straight at them. When I inspected from behind the corner, there was nothing. The guards had vanished! I think they were attempting to go around the buildings to arrest me without making too much of a scene. I had to out-maneuver them… Or I could create a distraction. I remembered what Klonoa taught me about throwing rocks at something close to the enemies to draw their attention away. I picked up a rock and threw it at the side of a house that was at the other end of the corner where I was, then I casually walked back out to the alley I was walking down before. I kept walking until I saw the store. Big faded yellow sign, just like Dew said. If the store I was looking for hadn't had the obvious sign, I would surely have gotten lost. Sometimes… I feel like I wouldn't be able to find my way out of a paper bag. I walked in and I immediately felt like I was sticking out like a sore thumb. All the women in the store were wearing their burkas, and there I was in my usual non-CWCstani garb. I mustered up the courage to stroll through the small store as if what I was wearing was normal. I picked out a normal black burka and brought it to the woman behind the counter.
"The guards hate it when women don't cover themselves…" The clerk whispered nervously. "How did you get in here showing that much of your body?"
"I had some tricks up my sleeve." I answered as I took the local currency out of my bandoleer.
"You're all set." The woman whispered. "Please put the burka on before you leave, I don't want you to be honor-killed by the guards…" I quickly put the burka on and tried my best to cover up my blonde hair.
"Is my hair covered?" I asked the clerk. She linked her index fingers together. I wasn't sure what that meant. "Is that a yes?"
"I can't see your hair. You should be ok, just try not to stare at the guards too much." I left the store. Now that I blended in, I had one more task; isolate a guard and bring him over to Klonoa, Narukami and Link. I had to think of something clever. So I walked around the town thinking about what to do… but then I realized; I need to bring them a uniform, not a guard. Luckily there were two guards talking to each other in an alleyway. It was secluded enough. I hid in an alcove, slipped my shoe off and took out the knife I hid. I slowly maneuvered over to them. One uniform had to be clean. I could stab one, but the other one had to be taken down in a clean way. "C'mon, KP, don't fail. Do your duty." The moment I lunged at them, I had mere seconds to get it done. I plunged the knife into one of the guards' throats and I ran at the other guy and grabbed the back of his head and his chin, and twisted it. I took a step back and made sure the two guards were in fact dead. I took the uniform I needed, dragged the bodies over to one of the houses that had a cellar, and I shoved them inside. Hopefully the resident in that house won't find those bodies. And even if they did… I hope it wouldn't be too disturbing to them. I hid the uniform under my burka and walked out to where Klonoa, Narukami and Link were. I handed Narukami the uniform, and he quickly put it on.
—-(Yu Narukami)-(Step 2: Visit the man with the biggest house)-
I put on the uniform Suomi brought me. It was a little small, but it would work. I call it a 'uniform,' but it was really just a black mask, some kinda green "man-dress" thing and a tan chest rig. Oh yes, I almost forgot to mention the CWC logo patch. I felt disgusting wearing that, but it was for the greater good. We were about to liberate the town and start a war with Neptune.
"Alright, I'm going in." I started. "I'll radio you when I've made it onto the roof."
"My life is in your hands, Bro." Klonoa put his hand on his chest.
"Don't worry about anything. You'll be fine." I said confidently. I strolled into the town like I owned the place and I knocked on the front door of the tallest house.
"Ba-ba, Ba-ba! A soldier is at the doooor!" That was a child's voice. The door then opened, and an older man was standing there, and he looked terrified.
"I've been asked to search your house…" I said gruffly. I had to sound like one of them, just in case one of the CWC guards were within earshot… which they were.
"W…W-We aren't hiding anything!" The man said, waving his arms around. "Please sir, it is just me and my children here." I barged into the house, just to continue the facade I had to play.
"What's going to happen, Ba-ba?" One of the kids asked their Father.
"I don't know, my love." The Man whispered. He held his child tight. I then made sure I wasn't in front of a window, then I took my mask off.
"Okay, listen to me." I whispered to the family. "Everything is going to be ok. I'm not one of them. My friends and I came here to free this town but I need to go up onto your roof in order to guide my friends through." Relief instantly came across the man's face.
"Yes… Allah bless you, good sir." The man said accompanied by a sigh of relief. He brought me upstairs and onto a balcony. "Here, I will boost you up." He got on his knee and put his hands together. He then boosted me up, and I was on the roof.
"Sir…" I called to him. "Keep yourself and your kids away from the windows until it is safe."
"I will. Thank you for wanting to help." The man said with glee. He went back inside, leaving me to survey the area. I didn't see very many good holdouts, so I figured the best course of action would be to evacuate civilians and start picking off guards.
"Suomi, do you copy?" I radioed.
"Yeah I hear you." Suomi answered. "Are we good to move in?"
"Do you still have the burka you bought?" I asked.
"I have it with me, but I just changed back into my coat." Suomi answered.
"I need you to put it back on, I have a plan." I started. "Suomi, you're going to be leading people out of the city and bringing them somewhere safe. Klonoa, I'll guide you through the city. Take out guards in Suomi's vicinity but stay hidden."
"Hey, what about me?" Link asked while not sounding offended whatsoever.
"Umm… youuuu…..huh…" I sat there pondering for a bit. I trusted Klonoa and Suomi wholeheartedly to finish the mission on their own… everything in Akechi's region proved their capabilities ten fold… Link however? I could have been risking the lives of my second family. I finally relented. The King said Link is a 'true warrior,' so I took his word, but I made myself slightly more comfortable with the knowledge that if any harm befalls Suomi, or especially Klonoa, I'd put Link down then go after the King myself. "Link, you're going to help Klonoa, stay hidden and stay smart. If I see you failing to do one of those at any time, I'll personally put you down." Actually I didn't say that last part, but I most certainly thought it.
"Alright, I'm going in." Suomi said determinedly. She then went into the town and started leading civilians out of the town right under the noses of the CWC honor guards.
"Klonoa, Link, go to the first building." I radioed after Suomi cleared the way enough. Klonoa and Link snuck over and stayed posted at the first house. I then saw one of the guards Suomi was talking to start walking towards the house where Klonoa and Link were. "Klonoa, go behind the building, Link, stay where you are and be ready to hide a body." The guard knocked on the door of the house but I figured I might as well take him out. Any opportunity to take out a guard would make the mission easier. The guard started talking to a woman at the door but I had to wait for a clean shot because the guard was standing right in front of the woman. I was worried my shot would go through the guard and hit the woman, luckily though it seemed my fears were short-lived. An arrow got shot through the guard's neck out of nowhere, followed by Link sneaking out of cover and hiding the body. "Link, I have to say it; good job." I said, trying my best to mask my surprise. Maybe Link actually could be of help?
"Thanks." Link said in his annoying little voice. Link may be an actual good warrior but his voice is just so aggravatingly annoying. We slowly kept moving forward with the plan. Not much happened besides me telling Klonoa and Link to take out a guard standing alone, followed by hiding the body afterwards. Suomi was still moving civilians to safety and taking out guards whenever she got the opportunity. There was this one point when Suomi was escorting this one girl out of the town. She looked very familiar to me, but I couldn't think of that at the moment. It was shortly after that event when things got bad. A few trucks rolled up to the West side, and they were PACKED with guards.
"Klonoa… Suomi… We've got trouble." I radioed.
—-(Klonoa)-(Step 3: SURVIVE)-
"What's going on?!" I radioed frantically.
"Five trucks just pulled up and tons of guards are headed into town." Yu warned me. "We might need to forget this town and fight another day."
"There are bodies here! Spread out and search!" I heard a guard yell. Suddenly they started firing at Yu! He quickly rolled away from the edge of the roof he was on to avoid enemy fire.
"Suomi, we have no choice now!" I radioed. "We have to fight!"
"We will defeat them together!" Suomi yelled as she ripped her burka off and started firing at the incoming enemies. Link and I made our way over to the house where Yu was. The guards' numbers were so strong, we nearly didn't make it over to the house. Suomi, Link and I were running as fast as we could while bullets seemed to fly in every feasible direction. Suddenly, an enemy fired an RPG at the house where we were, but he was aiming at Yu! The rocket veered slightly below Yu, but the explosion messed up the roof, causing Yu to fall off! There was another level below Yu that broke his fall. Suomi and Link fired at the guards as I went to help my brother back onto his feet. We quickly went inside the house quickly and Yu locked the door behind us.
"Surrender yourselves to almighty Chris-chan immediately or you will be beheaded!" One of the guards yelled in a thick accent.
"Well… I guess this is it…" I said sadly. I couldn't think of a way out.
"It can't end like this… I can't fail you, Klonoa… You're my duty." Suomi said sadly. She hung her head in complete defeat.
"Nanako… I'm sorry…" Yu said defeatedly.
"Wow… This guy has many delicious things in his fridge…" Link said happily, licking his lips. This was it. I had failed my family. I wasn't careful enough…
"We can fight to our dying breath or we can surrender ourselves and possibly survive." Yu said with a shred of hope.
"The choice is yours, Klonoa." Suomi remarked. I took a deep breath.
"They want us, so let's not give them what they want." I declared. I was ready to die but I wasn't ready for my family to die with me. That's something that no one can ever prepare themselves for. Things looked grim as we were preparing for our last fight, until we heard gunshots from further away.
"DIE, YOU LOL-COW-WORSHIPING NU-MALES!" We heard someone yell as they fired at the guards surrounding the house! Most of the guards fired back at them, but a few busted into the house. It was only a few, so we easily took them out and we were able to spread out and fire on their flanks.
"HEH HEH HEH! I'VE BEEN WAITIN' FOR A FIGHT LIKE THIS!" I heard someone else yell in a thick Southern accent. The enemies were getting cut down from both sides. They eventually tried to retreat.
"DON'T LET ANY OF THEM ESCAPE!" Someone yelled at us. We fired at the enemies that were trying to fight towards their trucks. They started throwing smoke grenades to cover their escape. The four of us ran through the smoke and polished off the last of the enemies. It was quiet. I stood there for a few moments. I thought today would be my last day.
"We… we made it, Brother…" Yu panted.
"We're okay!" Suomi shouted in delight as she hugged me tight. I was filled with a mix of happiness and fear… fear of what could have been. I hugged Suomi back.
"That was some awesome shooting back there!" I heard someone say. I looked over and saw a group of men standing on the other side of the now-dissipated cloud of smoke. Suomi and I ended our embrace, and the four of us walked over to meet the group.
"Are you the group that's been fighting Neptune?" I asked.
"We are now." A tall and muscular man wearing a yellow unzipped jacket with a lime-green undershirt said. He also had a very large and chiseled chin. "We've been wanting to fight, but we couldn't on account of tons of guards mixed in with civilians and no back up. I'm sure I can speak for all of us when I say; 'I'm glad you are here.' We were sitting in a basement waiting for an opportunity to get out of hiding. I was starting to think the day would never come, but then two dead CWC troopers were dropped into the cellar we were in, then we knew the fight was back on."
"Eh, I ain't glad about nothin!'" A blue Penguin holding a sawed-off shotgun yelled. "I don't trust Bluey and her rag-tag group of dudes to be as good of fighters as we are!"
"'Bluey?'" Suomi quoted with a scowl. "Seriously?"
"You'll have to excuse Dedede here, he can be a bit of a little female dog." Another guy said as he walked in front of the penguin in order to de-escalate the situation. This guy had brown messy hair and short facial hair. He was also wearing a blue t-shirt, khakis and had lots of tattoos on one of his forearms. I also think he's missing one of his ring fingers.
"How dare you?" The Penguin yelled at the blue-shirt guy. "If you call me one more name, I will order a monstah and have you clobbered until you can't even eat a bag o' dem chips!"
"Excuse me for being so rude, ladies," Another guy walked in between Suomi and the penguin. "But I think it would be a good idea to skip the insults, go straight to introductions and then go clear the surrounding areas before more nu-males come this way." This particular gentleman was possibly the oldest one in the group. He had black hair and some facial hair, but it was longer than blue-shirt's. He was wearing some sort of old army get-up like he was some kind of war veteran and had a green bandana around his forehead.
"Don't get your panties in a bind, Woods, I'll handle introductions." The yellow-jacket guy said. "I'm William J Blazkowicz, US Military but you four can call me 'B.J.'"
"B.J?" Yu asked in disbelief.
"What's wrong with that name?" I asked. B.J. then held up his hand.
"Moving on, before Frank here gets pissed again-" B.J. was cut off.
"Did I say we were on a first name basis… Billy?" The green-bandana guy snarled.
"That's Frank Woods, US Military." B.J. continued. "The blue Antarctic jerk over there is named Dedede-" Blazkowicz was once again cut off.
"Ay, I'm KING Dedede!" Dedede yelled. "Don't go around letting Bluey think she can call me just Dedede! It's KING Dedede! KING!"
"I think I'll just call you tomppeli." Suomi declared.
"'Tomppeli, huh?" Dedede scoffed at Suomi. "Bluey here thinks she can just make up words!" Suomi smiled at me with a 'get a load of this guy' look.
"I think we'll get through this quicker if we each step forward and introduce ourselves." A blue masked walking Spanish circle said. "I am Meta Knight, the masked swordsman."
"Wait, we get to say our names and a description?" The blue t-shirt guy asked in a somewhat mocking tone.
"In that case, I'm Jason Brody, the most athletic and sexy hecker of all time." Jason boasted. Jason didn't actually say 'hecker,' he said something worse.
"I am Inspector Gadget," A tall guy wearing a gray trench coat and hat said proudly. "The one with a robotic implant in his brain that lets him perform twelve-quadrillion calculations per second."
"I DON'T BELIEVE ANYONE ASKED, MAGGOT!" A man with a big chin and a helmet covering his eyes said. He then turned his attention to me. "YOU MAY CALL ME SOLDIER! YOU WANT SOMETHING BLOWN UP, SEND A REQUEST UP THE CHAIN OF COMMAND, PRIVATE FELINE!"
"Alright…" I said, feeling a little threatened. Not all of these guys made me feel uneasy, but the few that did… well they looked like they could bench press my dead corpse. I had to try and stay on their good side. I stood up straight and tried my best to salute. "Uhhh… ALRIGHT… SIR!" I yelled.
"NO SALUTING WHEN YOU ARE OUT OF UNIFORM, PRIVATE FELINE!" Soldier yelled as he clenched his fists and threw his head right into my face.
"I'm wearing a school uniform if that helps." Yu said nonchalantly. Soldier then exaggerated-marched over to Yu and got in his face.
"THAT DOESN'T HELP AT ALL, PRIVATE STICK!" Soldier yelled at the top of his lungs. Yu was taking it very well, considering Soldier was not only yelling in his face, but he was also slightly taller than Yu. They're so close in height, it's crazy. "ALL SCHOOL DOES IS TAKE AWAY FROM THE MILITARY'S YEARLY INCOME, CONSIDERING WE HAVE TO PAY FOR A FULL RIDE IN COLLEGE FOR EVERY MAGGOT THAT SIGNS OUR PAPERS! YOUR SCHOOL UNIFORM IS A SORE SUBJECT BETWEEN THE TWO OF US, PRIVATE! IS THAT CLEAR?" Yu simply stood there and nodded, not seeming to be shaken up at all. Soldier then turned his glance towards Suomi. "DO YOU HAVE ANY COMMENTS, MAAVOIMAT MAIDEN?"
"Nope, I'm good…" Suomi said with a tinge of nervousness in her voice. Who could blame her, Soldier is crazy. Another man stepped forward, this guy had very short black hair and stubble and was wearing some sort of yellow soccer jersey.
"You finished with your shouting match, loco?" He said in a calm voice. "My name is Dani Rojas, I was a soldier, now I am a guerilla. I fit in well here, since it seems like all of us are guerillas now." Woods walked over to Dani and put his hand on his shoulder firmly.
"I have my trusty colt commando, that's all I need." Woods said proudly. "I don't need to make a Wiley-the-Coyote-contraption to win a fight."
"I think you may end up eating those words someday, Sergeant." Dani retorted calmly. "Now, what are your names, amigos?"
"I'll keep it quick." I said as I stepped forward. "I'm Klonoa, this is Yu, this is Suomi, and this is Link." I said as I pointed at my friends respectively.
"Let's wrap this up, we have a few loose ends to tie up." Meta Knight butted in. "We must take the base closest to this town if we want to prevent another attack."
"He's right." B.J. said as he readied two shotguns, one in each of his hands. If I knew how he was able to do that, I certainly would use it all I could. We all got the evacuated civilians back into town and prepared for the worst case scenario by arming every person we could with the weapons of the eliminated guards. We then all got into the trucks post-haste and headed over to the base. We found a new group to help out. There are a few bad apples here, but I'm expecting to get to know these guys very well over the next few months.