This story contains moments of dark subjects/disturbing content.
Chapter 1: My Name Is Satozaki
"I don't wanna do this!" I protest.
"Mama's gonna be upset if you don't do what she says. Bad boys get punishment. Do you want to be punished?" he asks.
"N-No! Of course not!" I exclaim.
"Can't have it both ways. If you wanna avoid that then you'll do as you're told. That's how this works," he snickers.
"H-How could you laugh about this?" I ask, unnerved.
"Your words don't matter at all! Once you start, it will quickly become second nature! I look forward to how you perform, new brother of mine!" he cackles wildly.
What am I going to do?
The large woman who brought me here walks in with a big smile on her face.
"Boys! It's showtime!" she says excitedly, unlocking our cell door.
"C'mon brother! We have to get into our special costumes!" he says, grabbing my wrist and forcing me to come with him.
The woman dresses us in these weird clothes and makes the boy take me with him.
We stand before a big door.
"You're going to need this," he says, putting a knife in my hand.
My hand trembles heavily.
He suddenly lays a hand on my cheek, making me look at him.
"Follow my lead and we're sure to get those good boy points. Things will work out as long as you trust me," he smiles, his voice imitating whatever brotherly love sounds like.
His smile, whether genuine or fake, gives me a feeling that everything will be okay no matter what.
"O-Okay," I say.
The door before us slowly raises, revealing a circular arena.
In the arena stands a man, seemingly confused.
An announcer yells over the raging audience.
"That's our cue," he says, pulling out a knife for himself.
Without hesitation, he crazily runs out into the arena.
I… must go too.
Going into the arena, I watch him chase down the now frightened man.
He slashes the adult's legs up like it's nothing, bringing him to the ground while the masses cheer on.
Taking notice of my inaction, people start calling me out.
"What's that other kid supposed to be doing?! C'mon, let's see what you're capable of!" they shout.
Must I really participate?
The boy drags him across the ground to me, leaving behind a trail of blood.
He forces him to stand up on his knees.
"Make your move," he says.
"I-I beg of you! Please don't kill me!" the man weeps, fear prevalent in his eyes.
Something suddenly flips inside me.
Breathing heavily, I slowly raise the knife in the air, watching him desperately struggle to no avail.
"DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!" the people chant.
Looking at the boy for his answer, he nods excitedly in agreement.
My… hands are tied.
I must trust him.
"It's you or me," I say coldly.
Stabbing him in the right eye, he screams and writhes in extreme agony as the contents of his eye spill out.
Pulling the knife out, it yanks the eye straight out of his socket, stuck on the blade.
The audience roars.
Something about this… seems strangely right!
"How does it feel?" the boy asks.
"Good. Give me one of his hands," I answer, removing the eye from the knife.
"Here you go," he says with glee, letting me get a grip on a wrist.
"NO! PLEASE NO MORE!" the man yells.
Another bout of screams come out of him as I slowly cut into the skin between the fingers, getting my own hands dirty with blood as I mutilate his hand.
It's like I'm slipping away.
"You've gone quiet now. No more screams or pleading out of you?" I question.
He just looks at me, weakly panting.
Of no use anymore then.
With one swing, I slash his throat open, blood spraying all over my face and body as well as the boy's cheek.
What were once screams is now the gurgling of blood from a dying man, life draining away in his remaining eye.
For some reason, I can't help but crack a smile and giggle about it!
The boy seems pleased with me as well as the crowd.
Letting go of the body, he stands beside me and throws an arm over my shoulder.
"See? You're a natural at this!" he says.
We laugh together like we just heard the funniest joke of our lives.
"Seems our scrappers were warming up. How about we give them another?" the announcer suggests.
The crowd hypes up as an answer.
Just like that, another person is shoved into the arena.
Our playpen.
Looking at us, the new man tries to climb out of the arena to no avail, begging for mercy and to be spared.
"Ready?" the boy asks.
"Yes," I say.
Running across the arena towards our next victim, his panicked calls for help increase.
Being faster than me, he jumps on the guy and stabs him in the back repeatedly.
Catching up, I tackle the guy to the ground, both of us pinning him down while he squirms and pleads.
Taking our knives, we carve the back of his skull out and mash his brain like a potato, producing final shrieks of terror one would think impossible with us giggling all the while.
"How spectacularly brutal! Did you all enjoy the show?!" the announcer asks.
The crowd claps and raves.
Afterwards, we're taken out of the arena, cleaned up, and thrown back in our cage.
"That was an excellent show from the two of you," the woman compliments.
"Does that mean we get good boy points, Mama?" he questions.
"Of course! I'll be right back once I get your food for the night," she says, leaving the room.
It's strange.
As easily as things clicked, I feel normal again.
The things I did are slightly blurry in my mind but I know it was cruel.
Yet I'm still alive just as he said.
It's all necessary for survival.
However, I can't let that euphoric feeling rule over me or I'll lose myself.
I'll try to balance it out.
"Good job out there! I thought you were going to give your life up instead. That would have been disappointing," he says.
"Of course I wasn't going to do that. It should've been obvious," I say.
On his hands and knees, he creepily crawls towards me.
"What are you being so weird for?" I ask, scooting away from him with my back hitting the side of the cage.
"You gotta tell me how it felt! To kill for your first time!" he says, close to my face.
"I-I told you it felt good. W-What else can I say?" I stutter nervously.
"There's more to it than just that. Spill the beans," he insists.
"It was very… fun. Like something was taking over me," I explain.
"That sounds something like me! We're going to get along perfectly," he says.
"That's good to hear," I say.
"I just came up with a wonderful idea of my own design. You get good brother points!" he says.
How original.
"What are good brother points for?" I question.
"Playtime," he grins.
He jumps on me and attacks so I fight back, both of us starting to chuckle.
Tackling him, we wrestle around and he ends up pinning me down.
"Did you think you had a chance to beat me on your first try?" he laughs.
"No but it was a decent attempt at least," I snicker.
His smile fades a bit, giving way to a different expression.
Like he desperately wants something.
"You're going to be a really great brother," he says quietly, leaning closer and closer to my face.
"H-Hey! W-What are you do-," my words are suddenly cut off by his mouth.
What? What's this… other new feeling that's happening? I can't really breathe either.
As his face slowly pulls away, I can breathe again albeit heavily.
"Do you still trust me?" he asks.
"I-I do," I say.
I… I have to… especially when it doesn't feel like I have a choice in the matter.
He continues this… playtime with his hands running down my chest to my pants, tugging them down.
N-No! W-We shouldn't be doing this!
Pinning my wrists down by my side, he keeps bobbing his head while looking up into my eyes.
But yet it feels really good.
Too good.
Something quickly surges through me and I make a sound I've never made before, leaving me panting and body shuddering.
He swallows whatever just came out of me and twirls his finger at me.
I somehow pick up on what he's suggesting.
He lets me stand up and I nervously go over to the side of the cage, grabbing tightly onto it.
Looking back at him, he approaches and grabs my waist.
I yelp, feeling it slowly enter me as a confusing mix of emotions take hold in my body.
"K…," he grunts lowly but I can't hear his voice clearly.
"R-Rei!" I exclaim as he keeps bumping his waist against me.
"REI!" I suddenly wake up, yelling.
Breathing frantically, I quickly look around.
I fell asleep on the couch again.
Looking at my hands, I notice they're trembling.
The dreadful nightmares are returning yet again.
We're the same age, came from the same background, even grew up together and I'm supposed to be the more responsible and mature one.
So why the hell am I the only one with these problems and he seems to be better off?!
I hope one of the investigators kill that bitch for what she put us through!
Kill her myself if the opportunity arises!
And kill that traitorous bastard for what he did too!
I wish Rei and the others believed what I said about that asshole and why I attacked him!
What I wouldn't give to RIP THE GUTS OUT OF BOTH OF THOSE PIECES OF SHIT AND WATCH THEM DIE A SLOW AND AGONIZING DEATH!
I sigh.
Starting to sound like my old self again.
I need to calm down.
Rin wouldn't want me to do all of that even though I'm still pissed about it. So pissed about a lot of things.
I'm trying to respect her wishes and move on but it's just so hard to truly let go!
Grabbing the pill bottle off the coffee table, I quickly undo the cap and down a pill.
I really hate these fucking things.
Can't have another "incident" happen though.
They will definitely kill me if I lose my control again.
Like all the other bad moments I have from time to time, let's review myself.
My name… is Satozaki and I just wanna be happy and enjoy this much more normal life I've been given.
Nothing else.
See? Feeling leagues better already once again.
I hear knocking coming from the front door.
It's nighttime and sounds like it's even raining.
So just who could be visiting me?