Burt Looked at his watch on an asteroid wearing suit protected by force field. "What in the Pigs—" Before he finished two Gromflomite ships landed next him "Galactic Federation! So how much did you come with?" They showed the billions of Blemflarck "Good, four billion as we agreed." He took the case and shoved the box toward them and they opened to see a frozen fart. Gromflomites mouth things rubbed against each other.

Next day burt was buying gold, lots of it, because he didn't trust space money. One moment you can live like a king, the next you're in a barrel wiping your eyes with worthless money paper, weirdest vacation of the century!

He the value of gold plummeted. "What the f*ck? How the f*ck did the value fall that fast?!" Three eyes alien with a tentacle mouth shrugged, only getting four bares for a billion.

He got back on earth, he was in the attic getting high and preparing his weapons. He went down to ricks room to ask for portal gun and then saw the card. "Micheal huh? Cheap two." He called him.

"Krombopulos Michael! Payed killer, you can pay with your planets currency I just, love killing!" Burt smiled.

"Good, I need you to kill a gaseous life form, you need a antimatter gun and it is kept in a federation research lab, I don't the location but," He sent the money. "A billion should be enough." He made weird aroused noises, with his mouth. "I sent it's last known location and don't lead them back to me." He came down to see Beth and Jerry making out.

Rick looked at burt. "Hey, Burt you missed the existential shit show." He VR looking goggles and turned a few times and sat on the arm chair. "What are you doing?" He asked worried at He had something in common with Beth.

"Watching ball fondlers." He said seeing a different version of himself watching tv. Rick pulled it off and switched the channel. "Oh yea, baby! better then that cat fishing show." They look at him. "It was literal, I watched it while i got into fly finishing and then Jerry ruined it." They watched ball folders, while Beth and Jerry climbed the stares to their room.

Burt was at the school grading papers and counting the days to burn this place. He came home walked to the garage and found rick scanning tacky brass microscope having converted a camera and the head of a few rays guns into a scanner. "Dad, please tell me you aren't going to war because some nitwit sold you a fake 19th century," he said getting a closer look, one scan from his watch confirmed it. "made in 2011, it has a odd radiation Though?" He asked and saw rick had taken his laptop.

Morty came int the garage. "Hey, Morty, lemme ask you a question real quick. Does evil exist, and if so, can one detect and measure it?" Rick asked wait for him to not have an answer.

Morty Scratched the back of his head not having an answer. "Um…" Burt gave him the answer by nodding.

Rick didn't let finish. "Rhetorical question Morty. The answer is yes, you just have to be a genius." The machine scans the microscope. A bar on the laptop marked "IQ" drops to close to 0. "Your sister's boss gave me a microscope that would have made me retarded." Burt looked at the scans and saw it would have turned him into a vegetable.

"Ooh, oh boy Rick, I don't think you're allowed to say that word, you know?"

Rick defended himself. "Uh, Morty, I'm not disparaging the differently abled. I'm stating the fact that if I had used this microscope, it would have made me mentally retarded."

"Okay, yeah, but I don't think it's about logic, Rick. I think the word's just become a symbolic issue for powerful groups that feel like they're doing the right thing."

Rick just looked annoyed"Well that's retarded." Jerry lifts up the garage door.

He looked angry "What are you guys talking about?

"Apparently nothing." Rick answered.

Burt gave an explanation. "About a microscope that leads unimaginable discoveries but turns the user into a vegetable." Jerry ignored Burt.

Jerry Started accusing morty. "You asked him if Pluto's a planet, didn't you?" Burt rolled his eyes.

Morty yelled "No!"

Rick just said. "It's not."

Jerry yelled "Shut up, Rick."

Rick "Whoa." he raised his hands shocked at Jerry's sudden show of balls.

Bur then added. "Jerry stop saying It's a planet or else you will get probed."

Jerry pouted. "I don't care what anyone says. If it can be a planet, it can be a planet again. Planet. Planet, planet, planet." He left angrily.

Rick looked annoyed. "Stay scientific, Jerry." Burt looked over the findings. "Who wants to help me screw the devil?" Rick asked Burt and Morty.

"I have to do my science project." Morty left and so did jerry with a smile.

Burt smoked one. "Sure, better then grading papers." After a few minutes they were done. "I hoped this would take longer." Rick shrugged and left, Burt thinking this was the story of his life. He looked through the old toys beth had, mostly the sociopathic ones. "I should place these on morty and dad's shoes." He pocketed four of the stickers and stood up once he heard a tractor beam. He sighed. "Huh, Jerry got carried away to a planet full of idiots... His finally back to his own kind. Morty! How about I help you with... shit they took him too!" He sat on the couch and watched house hunter where people literally hunted houses.

Beth came home tired. "Jerry, Morty I'm hone!" She looked around noticing the house emtpy. "Where are they?"

Burt thought how to explain this and decided to say one word. "Pluto."

"What?! Did dad—" She spoke getting irritated.

"No, Jerry said Pluto is a planet and the Plutonians took him most likely so he could feed into their propaganda. They're dummer then Jerry." Beth sat down next to him. "You think they will crown him king of the dumb planet?"

Beth chuckled. "Or "you're now the leader of Pluto now! Because you have tiniest confidence in the solar system!" Burt laughed at that. "His really insecure about everything! I had to tell Morty to have him help with his project."

Burt nodded. "Sound's like dad to me, but replace his confidence with fear." Beth looked at him confused. "He is afraid of everything, that's why he's always pissed off, no matter what he does and whatever new weapon he has, he can't control the universe and even when he runs he keeps getting trapped." Beth looked at Burt the somber expression.

"Is that how you feel? Trapped in a universe wishing you could go somewhere else?" Burt didn't say anything else, just shrugging.

"Sometimes. Other times it's a cage. I have traveled everywhere killed the prime specimen of every species of life in the universe and slept with half of them." Beth though about what he said.

"Wanna get drunk?" The next moment they were in the attic singing random shit. "I don't get it, can't you l-leave like dad?" Beth asked looking down bottle before throwing it away.

"I don't want to and can't, d-d-dad took a-a-all of this isotope and I ned T-to travel b-between w-world." He turned his computer on showing multiple shitty worlds." I f-found 7 octillion and one where everything is the same, except you're a human surgeon and married to dumb actor jerry, but also have Summer and Morty." He look through another few worlds. "One where Morty has a sister name Myra who is a genius like Rick and f*cked a space prince, got pregnant had a alien hybrid miss prim and perfect, or this one where you died, after having Morty, Summer doesn't exist in this one. This one with a witch and some girl who out matches rick with magic."

Beth stared at the maps. "Oh my god." Even if they were a few paragraphs explaining it, she was still horrified of some world.

"Yea, who names a twin Myra? Morticia sounds better for Morty's twin sister." He looked through the map, one where humans only sing, one where you die if you stop screaming, another one just said "**ck world." He then stopped at the gender bend world. "She's a bitch." he said to the hologram of himself as a woman.

Beth looked asking why does her brother look so ugly as a woman. "Would look better with longer hair and make up."

Burt laughed. "That's what Summer said." He turned it off and went down to find Summer and Rick training. "Woah we have some Corinna Everson and Lou Ferrigno, here." Rick and Summer showed of their muscles. Burt took his gun and shot rick which lead the bullet jump of hit a vase. "Awesome! Two Henry Cavills." He saw the many needles. "How many drugs are you on?" Rick punched the wall. "Ok where are we going?" Summer showed her phone. "Crap." Burt took his worm hole gun, opening a portal to Seattle. He left the portal and followed the two hulks to n33dful things conference. Taping the beat down laughing at the second rate demon as Rick and Summer spat on Mr needful.

He got them ice cream afterwards, hoping the effects of the drugs would wear off soon and then followed them around Seattle beating up Neo nazis, bullies after he got them home and then people who mistreat dogs, which Burt enjoyed watch.

Next morning.

"Urgh what happened." Summer asked Rick both having a drug crash after the day of training. Burt was in the work shop building some kind of gun.

Burt looked at summer. "You got into a rager, started beating up that second rate demon, then beat a bunch bastards and if you wanna watch here." He gave his phone. "Oh and rick was building so gun I can't figure out what it should be." He left smirking as he had tricked rick to a degree.

Authors note: This was mostly here to show Beth and Burt relationship. Showing Beth doesn't have the same fear like she has to Rick of leaving. Yea I threw a little sh*t at my fellow fanfic writers sue me.