.
.
Covenant
.
.
Synopsis: In a harmonious world, who takes the blame?
What sins are punished and who decides?
Does vengeance leave with the last of its enemies?
As society rebuilds itself, Sakura learns some things can't be restored.
Not all beginnings start anew—not every ending brings closure.
And sometimes, peace isn't always that peaceful.
.
.
3:2. An Objective
.
.
WHEN KAKASHI summoned her early the next morning, she contemplated ignoring it. She wasn't speaking to him, after all—and they would see one another at noon, regardless. Plus, Suna, the host of this Kage Summit, was a three-day travel away. Sensei had plenty of time to say whatever he wanted on the way.
But once she ate breakfast, showered, and packed a small travel bag for the trip, Sakura swallowed the immaturity and made her way to Hokage Tower.
Kakashi was the Hokage. She was a Konoha kunoichi. Mad or not, there were still roles to perform and rules to follow between them. Although she doubted Kakashi would ever reprimand her over something like this, it wasn't her place to snub him anymore. Not when he was officially summoning her.
The new Inuzuka Clan Head, apparent from his cheek tattoos and the lotus pin he wore marking him as a Council member, stood across from Kakashi when she pushed her way inside his office without knocking. Both men's gazes shot her way, shoulders tensing.
Startled, her feet froze under her in the doorway. Embarrassment flushed across her face as they looked at her.
Then Kakashi smiled under his mask, easing the tension. "Sakura!"
"Commander," said the middle-aged Inuzuka man, bowing slightly.
"Apologies for the intrusion." She cleared her throat and straightened her spine. "I should've knocked."
"No apology needed. I was just leaving."
"That's right. Our business was finished. We were merely catching up," Kakashi explained. "Will you find Shikamaru and send him here as soon as possible, though, Rintani?"
She was thankful Kakashi had spoken the man's name. He looked familiar, and she was certain she'd met him on the battlefield before, but couldn't for the life of her recall who he was.
But she did recall how he came about his spot in leadership.
During her hospitalization, the medics whispered about the woman who'd held the man's position throughout the entire war. The previous Inuzuka Clan Head survived five years of battle, eight months of hiding, and made it home. One of the lucky ones, some might say.
And after six weeks of being home, she'd taken her own life.
Such a fate was common in the cities now. No one had actually escaped the battlefield. None of them ever would.
Sometimes luck was the heaviest burden of all.
The man named Rintani dipped his head. "Yes, Hokage." His voice tugged her back into the room. As he swept out, he offered her a small grin. "Good to see you again, Haruno."
Either he or his predecessor was one of only three to vote against charging Sasuke. That was something she wouldn't forget.
So she dipped her head lower than her rank called for. "You, too… Thank you."
By the time she glanced up to see if he understood what she was thanking him for, he was already shutting the door.
"I wasn't sure if you'd come," Kakashi called from behind.
Me neither, she thought.
Aloud, she said, "Well. Here I am."
Turning back around, she studied him expectantly, waiting for an explanation of what couldn't wait until they saw one another at noon. Deep shadows darkened his visible eye. He appeared slightly more gaunt than she last remembered.
If it were a month ago, she would've asked him if he had trouble sleeping. Pestered him about eating properly and taking breaks.
She kept quiet instead, until he finally broke the silence.
"First, I need to apologize to you, Sakura." She raised a brow at that. "This position I hold puts me in a difficult position when it comes to you and Naruto. I'm aware of it and can't do anything about it. If I could tell you everything, I would. But there are some things I can't…for more reasons than simply being Hokage. Some things are—"
The words seemed to die in his throat. Mouth still open, his face scrunched for a beat. Then, sighing, he closed his eyes and rubbed his temple.
"Well, I haven't worked a way around some…barriers, but know the things I keep from you are because my hands are tied, and I'm trying to protect you. Not because I don't want to or don't trust you."
She wasn't stupid. She knew his position changed their dynamic. That didn't mean she couldn't be angered by it, however, nor did it require her to be the one to try to fix it.
"Okay. Apology accepted." Giving a shallow smile, Sakura nodded towards the door. "If that's all, am I dismissed?"
"I've been talking with Sasuke."
The abrupt statement gave her pause. Was he trying to bait her? Anger her into an argument? Annoy her so she'd give up the appeasement act?
Except those weren't typical ways Kakashi dealt with her. With Naruto, yes—but not her.
"Good for you. As you're well aware, I haven't," she ground out.
"And you can be mad at me about that if it makes you feel better."
"Tsk." With a scoff, her vision narrowed. Maybe he was searching for a fight. "...Can I leave, Hokage?"
"Not yet. Now you should know I didn't give those orders specifically to keep you out. I didn't know he wouldn't let you in. It wasn't about you at all, really. He's still a student of mine who I'm deeply fond of, and he's lost everything, Sakura. As I told you before, granting him this small power to choose visitors is the least I can do."
The orders themselves weren't the problem. Sakura agreed that Sasuke ought to decide who did and didn't have access to him. That she specifically couldn't get access was the issue—and because she wasn't stupid, she knew that wasn't Kakashi's fault, either.
But to the Hokage, it must've looked like she thought as much.
And now that she was thinking it—she must seem so petty and small before him now, bitter after two weeks of little contact. Those weren't traits she wanted her sensei to attribute to her, even more so when he was more than just her sensei.
So Sakura stepped around the chair before Kakashi's desk and sat down, forcing herself to have the conversation.
"If you've talked to him… Then has he… Do you know why he won't see me?" she whispered, stare dropping to her lap.
Other shinobi might find this open display unbecoming. She at least knew Kakashi wouldn't.
"He hasn't told me exactly. We don't talk about things he doesn't want to, which isn't much. But do you want to know my guess?"
Peeking up at him, she nodded.
"He's protecting you."
The proposition brought a quick chuckle to her lips. Under Madara's cruel watch, such behavior might've been necessary; in Konoha, Sasuke had no reason for that. He needed protection here.
"If you're going to say anything, sensei, think harder next time."
"Let me explain, then. To begin with, I couldn't guess what side you'd come out of the war on. I don't think anyone but Naruto knew. I figured you'd probably still wish to protect Sasuke like you always have, but—"
"I'll always side with Sasuke," she interrupted, annoyed at the accusation and that Kakashi was the one stating it. He should've known better. "How could you doubt that?"
"Put yourself in my shoes. While I was in hiding, when you were captured, the reports we were getting—they were awful, Sakura." The emotion on Kakashi's face was ghostly. "Whenever we received news about you, I'd go sleepless for days. I could barely live with myself during those months. If you'd been killed…"
"What sort of reports are you talking about?"
He hesitated before answering. "You were very publicly being kept as Sasuke's…personal prisoner. He and Madara made a spectacle of it. All the gatherers who got eyes on you said you were sickly and out of it. Possibly drugged or under the effects of a jutsu. You frequently showed signs of recent torture…and other things. Even as someone who knows both of you well, it was hard to hear. Extremely, extremely hard to hear."
"That was the only way. If Sasuke hadn't—"
"I know. I'm aware he was doing what he thought best. But he never explained his actions, we had no direct contact with you outside of reports, and with the state you came back in—"
"It wasn't Sasuke's fault."
Silenced, Kakashi regarded her with patience.
Perhaps she ought to be ashamed for how fast she was to defend him, after everything. After he so obviously wanted nothing to do with her in Konoha and hadn't bothered contacting her a single time in the five months he spent away.
Because—wasn't it Sasuke's fault she ended up in Madara's clutches in the first place? He hadn't warned her about the attack on Lightning. He hadn't come to save her in that wintery jungle. Even if he occasionally acted to keep her alive afterward, it still didn't counter the fact that none of it would've been necessary if he'd said something.
Anything.
If Kakashi thought similarly, he didn't say so.
"But I didn't know you felt that way when the war ended. Honestly, I still don't know. You never bring him up. You've never asked me about him, his whereabouts, if I knew anything about his movements. You could barely stand hearing his name when you first came home. Sometimes, I wanted to ask and stopped myself for fear of making you… Uncomfortable." He took his Hokage hat off and placed it on the desk between them. "The first real conversation you and I had about Sasuke was the day after he returned."
She ruminated on his words.
It was true that she almost never spoke on Sasuke. True that she'd had a hard time talking about him, or hearing others talk about him, when they first got back to Konoha.
But wasn't that just the war?
No one else was talking about it, either.
And without anyone bringing it up, it bled into the city like a poison. Everyone went about their days as shadows of their former selves, careful not to push too deep or touch upon it too hard. Cautiously ignoring their own pain and blissfully avoiding others'.
Was that the reason the Inuzuka still had to choose a new Clan Head despite their previous one surviving the war?
Was that why Kakashi, who'd always been so good at reading her, hadn't any idea what she was thinking after five months? Why he was afraid even to bring it up?
"I would've let him die if that's what you wanted," Kakashi continued when she never responded. "Although he's also my student, I intend to stand with you again, Sakura. You deserve that from me. Since I couldn't know for certain where you were on the matter, I tried to keep as neutral as possible."
The confession was shocking; reality, however, didn't match.
"Letting him get charged and arrested was you being neutral?"
He chortled. "You may be surprised, but yes. It wasn't until I saw you two together outside the gates that I somewhat understood what you wanted."
"Fine. I get it. I should've opened up to you, sensei. What does this have to do with him refusing to see me, though?"
"I would love it if you came to me with your troubles. But the point was—if things the Allies heard while in hiding were enough to plant doubt in his former sensei, you can imagine how others who already hated Sasuke took those reports. And you were steadily by his side all that time."
Of course she was by his side then. She was a prisoner. Where else could she have gone?
The Allies never came for her. Sasuke had been the only one she could stand by.
"And? So what?"
"In his mind, he's likely to be condemned to death. He's probably thinking something martyr-like down there—such acts run in his family, believe it or not. My crimes should die with me," Kakashi made finger quotes and rolled his eyes, "or something similar. You know how all-or-nothing he can be. You getting involved in the process might get you caught up in the mess he's thrown himself in. I'm worried about it, too."
"Are there people in the Council or any of the Kage who doubt me?" She held in the—After everything I went through for them?—that came after.
"No one doubts you. Everyone understands captives do what they must to survive. But people doubt Sasuke, and if you tie yourself to him any further now that you're free, I'm sure he thinks those negative feelings might harm you by association. Especially once he's executed."
The final word of his sentence emptied her brain.
"He won't be executed. And on that topic—he's got full pardons, Kakashi. I still don't understand how we're doing this to him after the promises we made."
"That's why I called Shikamaru. Since you've agreed to come to the Kage Summit, you should hear about some things that happened while you were gone. If you're comfortable discussing it, that is." Kakashi glanced behind him, out the windows. "Speak of the devil. He's walking in now.
"What's Shikamaru got to do with it?"
"He was the one working with Sasuke during that time. Sasuke refused to meet with me, and I wanted to send someone he knew and I trusted. Naruto couldn't go for obvious reasons, so that left Shikamaru."
Things were clicking into place. How Sasuke had known Shikamaru was alive. The little information he'd let slip about the Allies while she was a captive.
But—"How could Shikamaru make contact with Sasuke?"
"Do you remember that Sasuke has kamui?"
"Remember? I mean, I saw him use it while I was with Madara, yes."
His eyes slid back to her, contemplative. "Right. Well, I'd send Shikamaru into kamui, and Sasuke would send him back out. Sometimes, we'd arrange for them to meet at specific locations. It was all very touch and go."
"How did you alert one another that you wanted to meet?"
"Our summons were working together. Summons can freely visit other—" The Hokage's statement was cut short by a knock on the door. "Come in!" he called.
Shikamaru waltzed inside, head lowered. When he looked up, his gaze immediately landed on her.
They hadn't interacted much since the war ended. She wasn't sure whether it was her doing or his, or if it was simply the fate their relationship was always destined towards.
They were two people who understood each other's burdens deeply. They'd both been forced to make decisions that resulted in the deaths of hundreds—thousands of people, when they weren't Kage. When there were shinobi above them who should've been responsible for shouldering such choices.
And Sakura thought: Maybe such an understanding made it impossible to ever be close again.
Ino, Naruto, and Hinata would never understand. Just like she and Shikamaru could never understand the weight those three carried out of the war.
Everyone had their own traumas dragging them down. Chaining them back onto the battlefield.
"Sakura. Long time no see," he said, monotone as always. "What did you need, Kakashi?"
"Sit. It's time you explain some things to Sakura, here."
"...Oh." After a slight pause, Shikamaru made his way to the chair next to hers and sat.
"If there were things to explain, you should've done so months ago, Hokage," Sakura accused.
"As I said, none of us knew how you felt about the matter. If you wanted Sasuke to receive punishment, it was better to leave this untouched."
"She's right. You should've informed her a while ago. And if you want me to debrief everything, we'll be here all day. So is there something specific you've brought me for?" Shikamaru scratched the side of his head. "I have work I need to get back to."
"I want to know all of it." Her sights shifted between the two men.
"Yes, and you're free to hear it all when we return," said Kakashi. "Since we're leaving soon, we should focus on Sasuke's pardon issue for now. As you know, Shikamaru, Sasuke's in the dungeons."
"Yes."
The words were spilling out before she could catch them—"He's there because the Council you're a part of retracted the agreement."
Shikamaru sighed. "For the record, I voted against those charges."
"I heard. Thank you. But everyone else should've, too. Tsu—the Fifth Hokage granted him a clean slate if he worked with the Allies. Even if you weren't in the original debrief, I'm sure you were made aware." Watching Shikamaru for any reaction, she added, "All of the Council should've been made aware."
Shikamaru sighed again, noisier this time. "We were all aware. Sasuke gave up his pardon, though, so most of them didn't care."
"Then if you were all—" His confession belatedly sank in. "Wait, what?"
"He gave up his pardon," Shikamaru repeated, shrugging. "But the bargain he made wasn't appropriate for the Tsuchikage and Mizukage to demand in the first place, which is why I think it's invalid and why I voted not to charge him. Sasuke should absolutely receive his pardon. Especially considering his plan was successful."
It all fell like gibberish into her ears. "What bargain? What plan?"
"Yes, let's start there," Kakashi directed.
"Alright." Shikamaru rested his chin on his palm. "Around the time your traveling party entered Fire Country, when Madara had you, Sasuke sent us a demand that the Allies completely do away with the plans we'd laid out to kill Madara. Plans we'd been working on for months, mind you. He said our timeline was unacceptable. We'd decided to make our move in January."
"...You were going to leave me there until January?" Sakura eyed Kakashi in disbelief.
That she'd made it as long as she had was shocking.
But the Allies had expected her to last another five months with Madara? Either their opinion of her was far too high, their estimation of Madara's viciousness too low, or they truly hadn't thought of her well-being in the slightest.
She wasn't expecting any different from the other Kage. Sakura wasn't theirs. At least Kakashi and the other Konoha shinobi should've done something more, however…
Right?
"I wasn't. Eight months was too long already. One month was too long. I would never leave you, even though you—" Whatever Shikamaru wanted to say died in his lungs. His gaze flicked to the Hokage before he coughed and continued. "Anyway. I had no part in deciding the original plan. Regardless, Sasuke came and offered a better one. He said we should plant shinobi in certain bases, let them get caught, and feed into Madara's ego. He assured us he could convince Madara to amass most of those captured in the large prison on Hidan's base and that most would survive so long as they didn't cause trouble."
"The very plan we ended the war with," Kakashi summarized.
"Yes. It was all Sasuke, with some tweaking from myself and the Kage."
It sounded a little like the men were praising the last Uchiha.
"What about his pardon?" she asked.
"When he presented the plan, he gave the Kage only six hours to agree. That wasn't enough time to have any substantive debate on it. It was a brilliant strategy—but extremely high risk and with many variables. Since Sasuke wouldn't work with Kakashi, I stood in for Konoha and voted to accept the plans. Gaara agreed. The Raikage declined to vote."
Shikamaru counted the Kage off on his fingers. "The Mizukage and the Tsuchikage voted no. By then, Kiri Division had already lost significant numbers and didn't feel comfortable agreeing to give up more shinobi. Iwa… Well, they've always been difficult. And Sasuke threatened to stop working with us if we didn't accept his plan by morning, or agree to shorten the timeline into September with some new plan we might devise later."
Sasuke hadn't told her any of this. She wanted to pinpoint exactly when this meeting happened, but Shikamaru was explaining too quickly for her to think it over.
"But with only six hours, we couldn't convince the Raikage to vote either way, and the Mizukage and Tsuchikage wouldn't listen to reason. When he returned at his deadline and we hadn't reached a consensus… He said he'd take full responsibility for the matter, even if the plan was successful. The Tsuchikage and Mizukage asked if that meant he'd give up his right to a pardon if they voted for it." Shikamaru frowned. "Sasuke said he would."
"Why would they want that from him?" she quizzed, irked. "He was offering a better plan."
"It's impossible to know what plans will end well before they happen. That one was particularly dangerous. Gaara and I saw the vision, but we were only proven right because it worked. He was asking permission to tell Madara Classed information. Coordinates of hidden Allied bases. They argued he'd need to accept punishment for such high treason—and if he were punished for one thing, he would need to accept punishment for the rest."
"That logic makes no sense."
"I agree," said Kakashi. "It's clear they used it as a means to trap him. Neither the current Tsuchikage nor Mizukage held those positions when the Kage accepted the terms of Orochimaru's agreement. I believe they always intended to try revoking it. The Raikage mentioned they'd floated the idea to him before. Sasuke giving up troops and coordinates was the perfect way."
"But Sasuke wasn't the one giving up troops or coordinates. I was," she said, louder than necessary.
Kakashi and Shikamaru shared a dim look.
"He was feeding them to you. Right?" the Hokage prompted.
"He was, but they were still coming from my mouth." She kept to herself the secret that Sasuke nearly gave away coordinates when she'd hesitated the first time. That he probably would've given them all away himself if she hadn't cooperated.
"That's not something you should tell anyone, Sakura. Between us, it's fine." Kakashi leaned forward on his desk. "But you can't let anyone else know you were involved so directly."
Shikamaru nodded in her periphery. Her brows knitted.
"Didn't your reports say I was the one giving up the coordinates? Madara didn't keep it a secret."
"We… Managed those," the Hokage conceded, voice quiet.
"Listen, Sakura." Eyes wide, she turned to focus on Shikamaru, who leaned towards her, too. "The focus might be on Sasuke right now, but you're also in a tricky spot. The wariness directed at him can easily swing onto you if you aren't careful."
"It's for your sake," agreed Kakashi. "I'm doing what I can to help Sasuke, but I'll give him up to protect you."
"All of us will. With the way the Council acts, nothing's stopping them from coming for Ino, Naruto, Kakashi, and even me, despite the fact I'm on the same Council. All of us with any connection to him are at risk once they decide to go for you."
Leaning back into her seat, she ran cold fingers over the scars on her arm.
They were throwing a lot of information at her all at once. As if the two men had synced onto the same wavelength—they were talking so fast, and so hushed, it wasn't easy to process it all.
The last thing she wanted was to jeopardize her loved ones. Sasuke was precious to her, too, though. Kakashi and Shikamaru might be willing to scapegoat him, but she couldn't say the same. She shouldn't have to choose between Sasuke and everyone else.
Surely, Naruto would agree.
Sasuke had won them the war.
"Does Naruto know about any of this?" she wondered.
"We should probably tell him now that you know," Shikamaru muttered, a scowl crossing his face. "But you'll have to watch him. He's as nuanced as a typhoon."
Nodding, the Hokage snatched his hat and settled it back on his head. "Right. It won't do you, Sasuke, or any of us for that matter, any good if you or Naruto look overly compromised. We must work together now that we know our shared objective, which means keeping each other in check."
The oath she'd made Orochimaru whispered in the depths of her mind. I will cooperate with Madara Uchiha and disobey my superiors to the extent it protects his life. Had he known this would happen all along? Was the Sannin that many moves ahead of them all?
There was no way. That was months before the war ended—when Madara still held all the pieces.
But nonbinding contract or not, she was determined to save Sasuke.
"My objective is still to free him, sensei."
"Then that's what we'll aim for," Kakashi promised.
.
.
To no one's surprise, the Kage Summit yielded no results for Team Sasuke, as Naruto had dubbed them.
On their way to Suna, Kakashi had summarized the same briefing Shikamaru gave For Naruto, glossing over the reports on her he'd alluded to. His doing so hinted at the suspicion Shikamaru confirmed during their short conversation—
They'd left the jinchuriki in the dark about many things. Maybe more than they'd left her.
The difference was that Naruto seemed not to notice. Or, if he did, he'd left the matter untouched for one reason or another.
Naruto hadn't taken the disclosures with the same grace she had. He'd called the Tsuchikage and Mizukage every insult under the sun; deemed the Raikage a spineless bastard for refusing to vote.
And Sakura agreed with him. That wasn't the point, though.
They needed the Kage on their side. Criticizing and attacking them wouldn't win them any favor.
So Naruto was relegated to a support member during the meeting, while she and Kakashi tried to reason with the three holdouts. All the Kage thought favorably of Naruto, and if he'd been able to articulate what was needed, he would've been the better mouthpiece.
But as Shikamaru said, he had no nuance. And that's all politics were, to the detriment of Team Sasuke.
The authority inherent to a Kage might afford Naruto the power to ignore such things. Unfortunately, until he held the position, Naruto had to play by the same rules that Sakura did. And he simply wasn't as good at the game as she was.
While Kakashi had done his best, it was clear to her that the other Kage took his word on this matter with a grain of salt. Hers, too—but not nearly at the same level.
It made her wonder what Kakashi had done to warrant such distrust.
It made her a bit more trusting of her sensei.
Gaara was a gem, as always. He'd had her back at every turn, agreeing with her points and reprimanding the Tsuchikage when Kurotsuchi's comments were more personal than the conversation called for. Naruto had shaken his hand at the end of the meeting, welcoming him onto the Team.
Welcome as the Kazekage's support was, it wasn't enough. Team Sasuke needed one additional Kage to come to their side to drop the charges in the International Tribunal.
Sakura had hoped the relationship she'd fostered with the Raikage during the war would be sufficient to sway him. Yet, all she'd gotten was a vague statement that A might change his vote if Sasuke prevailed in the Konoha trial.
The Mizukage and Tsuchikage had held firm.
Chojuro, she could understand. Of all the five villages, Kiri suffered the worst during the war. Most of their best shinobi defected to Madara, and many who hadn't didn't survive. His reasons for opposing Sasuke, the top general of their enemy's army, made sense. The small populace of Kiri that made it home likely wouldn't accept him doing any different.
It was the Raikage and the Tsuchikage that Sakura couldn't accept. Both leaders lost many over the past five years—but not enough that their people wouldn't understand them fulfilling an agreement that bought them victory.
Their opposition felt more like personal vendettas than anything. They wanted their pounds of flesh and no less. Sasuke's compliance simply wasn't enough; they wanted him to suffer.
And nothing Sakura, Naruto, or Kakashi said could sway them. Konoha's delegation left the Summit empty-handed.
She'd anticipated as much, but the failure still stirred resentment within her.
As much as possible, Sakura tried not to think of her shishou. Memories of the woman always left her a mess if she dwelled too long. But she couldn't help wondering if Tsunade's presence might've changed anything.
If it was Tsuande demanding that they come around, would the Kage have listened?
Now, on their way back to Konoha, muted in defeat, there wasn't much to distract her from that train of thought. Of a bloody, snowy field. Of sad, honey eyes. Black stakes and wrinkled hands. Lightning and blade and screams and—
If not Tsunade, countless other things were nipping at her heels in the trees. Taunting her to turn and fall into them. Dead friends, broken promises, last smiles. Bodies falling into a split in the earth, bodies limping under her hands, bodies piling atop one another.
Something about the lifeless winter forest, the swell of her chakra, and the vast freedom in every direction had the ragged scars on Sakura's left arm burning.
It didn't matter that she was safe with Naruto and Kakashi now. Didn't matter that she was at full strength. There were no enemies nearby. No guards flanked around to stop her from running. No cloth kept her blindfolded.
The last time she was in these trees, she'd been a prisoner. She'd lost everything. Her body still remembered it all like a well-tuned instinct.
Since the war ended, the outer training grounds were the furthest she strayed from Konoha's gates. Her mission had occupied her on the way to Suna, but nothing kept the recollections at bay as they traveled home.
They sped past bases Madara had paraded her at. Camped near the same spots she and her guards had rested. Places where people she knew had disappeared forever. Where shinobi had given themselves up for her and never came back.
The memories fell out of the corners she shelved them in. Scattered about her mind in disarray, begging her to notice them, growing in number with every mile they ran. Loud and dark and nauseating.
Faces of captives slaughtered.
Her screams of agony.
Madara's wicked grin as he gave his speech.
Sasuke's warm lips and cold teeth.
More than once Naruto had called to her, asking if she needed a break. Wondering if she was okay.
But how could she ever share this sort of trauma with him? Even if he provided reassurance and settled her heart for the moment—it would only bandage the wound for today. Nothing he might offer could make it hurt any less tomorrow. Nothing he gave her would fix it.
He'd never understand. And if he looked upon her with pity, she might scream.
So she assured him she was fine every time he glanced back at her, worry in his gaze.
It was yet another brick in the wall between her and those she cared about. A reminder that they could never go back to who they used to be, no matter how close they were, or how much she wished they could.
The most twisted thing of all was how—maybe—they could. If she was willing to tear down the wall, acknowledgment might follow. Such a thing was easier said than done, though.
And she wasn't strong enough or ready to wield that sledgehammer yet.
Two hours from home, Kakashi fell back to her side, allowing Naruto to lead them. She inspected him, lips quirked, when he sidled closer than usual.
"Something wrong?" she asked.
"No. I've just been thinking."
"That's never good."
"Truer words have never been spoken." He paused as they landed on the next branch. "Were you planning to try your luck with Sasuke again when we get back?"
The question gripped her throat. "...I don't know. Maybe."
She'd considered it. But they said that insanity was doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results—and after the Summit, she was rather tired of meeting defeat.
Another minute of silence followed before he suggested, "You should. Tonight. Around ten."
"Oh? Ten?" she parroted, something swelling within her that she feared to name.
"Mhm… You might get lucky."
.
.
They got back to Konoha at five that evening.
Naruto wanted to get ramen together. Their sensei accepted the invitation, telling Naruto to bring Hinata along. As much as she would've liked to join, Sakura's guilt over shirking duties for the past week had her declining.
She headed first to the hospital, to check with Shizune that everything was in order.
Shizune was more than qualified to oversee everything, but Sakura was Head of Medical. That she'd dumped her responsibilities and ran off to a Summit that resulted in nothing didn't sit quite right. There were many capable medics and fewer patients than last month, but she still felt the mantle of obligation heavy on her shoulders.
No fires had ignited in her absence, Shizune assured her. So she finished up some paperwork she hadn't gotten to before the absence, checked in on a few shinobi in the critical ward, then went home to clean and shower.
It wasn't until nine forty-five that Sakura made her decision.
Despite experience roaring against it, she ventured out of her apartment and went to the dungeons.
One last time, she'd trust in her sensei. Kakashi wouldn't drop such a blatant comment in jest. He gained nothing from stirring her expectations without reason; and while she'd had doubts, the Hokage had steadfastly supported Sasuke's acquittal at the Summit as promised.
Still, to her dulled surprise, what—or rather, who—she found at the inner doors proved that faith worthwhile.
The owl-masked ANBU bowed as she approached, low and steady. "Haruno."
She couldn't hide the smile overtaking her face. "So it's you tonight."
"Per the Hokage's request." He straightened, posture eased. "I'm glad to see you. It's been a while."
"It has," she concurred. "Where have you been?"
"My orders keep me at the borders."
"And you've been well?"
"Yes. Very. I wanted to check in with you, but I'm not often inside the city."
Honestly speaking, with everything going on, she hadn't thought about this man. But he'd kept her safe through the later years of the war and was one of the few shinobi in Konoha she trusted with her life. Notwithstanding she had no idea who he was.
It genuinely was good to see him—even though her main objective had her craving to speed past this interaction.
"I'm always at the hospital. Come by for a check-up next time you rotate home. I'll be happy to do it personally."
"I'll do that." Amusement laced his tone.
Sakura motioned at him. "This entrance usually has two guards."
"I wouldn't know," he answered casually. "This isn't my typical assignment."
Hope churned in her like a sickness about to spew, dangerous as it was.
"Mm... That's true. Well, I'd like to enter. Can I go in?"
"Of course." Pushing open the door, he shuffled aside. "Who am I to deny my Commander?"
It took her almost ten seconds to register her victory.
Without another word, Sakura walked forward and entered before the ANBU changed his mind. She flew down the steps, knowing instinctively that they'd keep someone of Sasuke's notoriety at the lowest level. Further and further into the earth she plunged, the cold of underground pressing on her skin like ice. Head empty as a dead lake.
And then she was there. At the last cell.
Sakura moved slowly, a hunting cat who'd found prey. This floor of the dungeons was freezing—stifling in its stillness. There were no firelights on the ceilings. Every breath she took reverberated on the walls.
Since she hadn't allowed herself to expect anything, she hadn't prepared for what to say or how to act. She moved forward with no plan except to see him. No agenda but assuring herself that he was here, and well, and home.
It felt like a dream. Her lungs grew tight the closer she drew. Her fingers twitched with nervousness as she halted before the cell bars. Squinting into the darkness, she searched for a familiar figure on the other side, heart treacherously fast and stomach flipping.
Her right mind knew she ought to feel anger in this moment. Her intuition warned her that this meeting wouldn't be the sweetness other women gossiped about with their friends. Their seal was silent as a corpse—his doing.
Even so, she couldn't help herself. She missed him. Longed for him like she'd longed for a draught a week after the war's end, chained down to a hospital bed, shuddering and sweaty.
But she couldn't see anything.
"Sasuke, are you there?" she called quietly, voice shaking.
"Haa…" The low timbre sent shivers across her whole body. "Fucking Kakashi… I knew that new guard's chakra felt familiar."
.
hello good people!
there will be a break, potentially until the first week of December, unless I find the time to change that.
thanks for reading, as always.
and thanks to Leech for beta-reading