Chapter Two: Family Lost
"I told you, I would be getting a job once I finish school. I can't handle working and school at the same time." I groan.
"I just need you to find something part-time, something to make a bit of extra money Ryker. I'm not asking for you to work forty hours a week." Mom pleaded.
We had been going back and forth about getting a job. Mom suddenly became really worried about money ever since I met her 'work' friend Damien a few weeks ago. I didn't understand why, I thought she made decent money, and that her work at the SDC was paying enough for our cost of living, but she seemed to think differently.
It practically came out of nowhere, only a week after my spat with Damien she began to start floating the idea of me getting a job. I should think about working so that I could help out with bills and also start saving up a nest egg for when I move away. Not out, but away. That's how she always worded it.
It didn't matter how many times I told her that I already had my hands full with school and that I mentally couldn't handle taking on any more projects. My class load was already heavy as I was enrolled in several university prep classes for my transition to getting my law degree. My evenings were spent finding the perfect university for me to attend and filling out scholarship applications. I was sixteen and would be finishing high school in only a year. The work was brutal but I managed it, even if I didn't quite find the same love and passion for it as my other peers in the same classes.
None of that seemed to matter, so many nights spent in screaming matches with my mom as she begged me to work and make money. Her reasonings for why are always changing. One moment it would be about how we were living paycheck to paycheck, to her wanting me to make sure that I had enough saved away to live comfortably on my own. I always tried to ask if that meant she was kicking me out when I finished school but she never answered and always deflected.
"Mom, I am not getting a job. I need to focus on school and it's already too much to do as is. I am not mentally capable of doing what you want me to do."
"Ryker, it's not about what you can do, it's what you have to do. You have to do this. You need to be self-sufficient. I'm not going to be around forever to pay your bills and keep the lights on."
"I don't get why you keep talking like you're going to kick me out. Did I do something wrong?" I ask the question making my voice hitch.
Mom seemed to deflate at the question, breaking the distance between us. The living room of our apartment suddenly felt a lot smaller than it usually did. She swept me up in a hug. "Of course, I'm not going to kick you out. Ryker I love you, you are my son. I just need you to be ready for life as an adult."
"But why now? The school year isn't even over for another few weeks and I'm not even in my senior year? Nobody my age is working right now. They are all focusing on school and will work during the summer."
I pulled away from her, Mom's face contorted into a mix of emotions I just couldn't understand.
"Just think about it. Please, Ryker." She begged.
I just groan, turning from her and heading to the door. "I will see you later, bye," I say waving over my shoulder as I open the door.
"I love you."
I stopped in the doorway, pausing at her words. "I know, have a good day at work," I call back, shutting the door behind me.
I wandered for a few hours, exploring the downtown district. The heart of the city always offers interesting places and people. I knew that by now my mom would have been at work for a few hours, the sun setting on Atlas bathing the city of Mantle in burnt orange light. I could head home soon, the walk clearing my head.
As I walked my stomach growling told me what I was gonna do before home, get food. Frankly, there was only a single place that would be able to bring my mood up. A noodle stand that mom had taken me to within the first week of her adopting me. The place was cheap and run down. The elderly cat faunus who ran it was old and closer to death than anyone wanted to admit. It made my heart ache just thinking about what would happen when he passed.
The trip to the stand was on the way home, easily spotting the bright candlelights of the stand, the smell of different meats and spices filling my senses. I approached the privacy curtain and pulled it aside, ducking my head in with a smile on my face. "Hey Mr. Meyama, mind grabbing me a bowl of my usual? extra shrimp please."
"Well look who it is, the little wannabe faunus. Ryker, how are you doing Little Cub? Is your mom with you?" Mr. Meyama jeered, his eyes twinkling with amusement as I took a seat.
"Na she's working tonight, just out on a late night walk. clearing my head."
"If you are out this late and she's not with you that must mean you two got into a fight again. That's the third time this month. You know, you should listen to your mother Little Cub. She just wants what's best for you."
I waved him off scowling but he just shot me an unimpressed look as he tossed his shrimp into the wok he was working on.
"I don't think shipping me off to anywhere but near her is what's best for me," I argue.
Mr. Meyama seemed to think for a moment, his face neutral and not revealing how exactly he felt about my statement. He sighed, his face losing a bit of that lightness that I always saw from him.
"Sometimes Little Cub, what's best for you, doesn't seem like it at the time. Sometimes what's best really hurts, and only once you make it out the other side can you look back and understand."
"I just don't see how losing the only family I have is what's best for me."
Mr. Meyama nodded, though chose to stay silent as he placed my bowl of food in front of me. The deep aroma of the noodle broth and shrimp warmed me up from the inside out. I grabbed my chopsticks and dug in, the moment the food hit my tastebuds I let out an embarrassing moan at the flavor. I couldn't help it, Mr. Meyama served heaven on a plate.
"How's your daughter? The one you said is training to be a huntress?" I ask, trying to make some sort of conversation that isn't focused on the elephant in the room.
"Kara? Oh, she's fine. She's making friends and passing her classes. Though she's being cagey on if she has any boyfriends yet. That girl, I swear if I didn't know any better I would think she was lesbian."
I choked on the broth, hot liquid going down the wrong pipe from the off-handed comment. "Why would you assume that? Maybe she just hasn't found anyone interesting yet. She's only a year older than me, and I have never thought about dating, so maybe she's the same."
This time it was Mr. Meyama who waved me off. "First of all Little Cub. My beautiful Kara has had boys drooling over her since she was thirteen, I have had to beat them off with a stick till she was able to do it herself after combat school. Second, You say you have never thought about dating but I have seen you ogle women before. You aren't sly."
My cheeks burned at the comment. I wanted to say that he was wrong but the real reason was pretty much worse in every way. I had not been 'ogling' women as he put it. I just had a bad tendency to stare. I was a people watcher, I watched everyone, and it was how I got better at telling how people felt just by facial expressions. Maybe I looked at women a little bit longer but not because I was checking them out. I was more caught up in their clothes.
Men all dressed so similarly. Pants, a shirt, and sometimes a coat. It was boring and frankly, they all tended to blur together. Women on the other hand had all sorts of things from dresses to tons of different types of shirts, skirts, leggings, and pants. Don't even get me started on the shoes. so many different types of shoes, from sandals to boots that went past their thighs. Women had so many more options than men! It made me jealous a lot of the time. It's why I tended to wear just baggy clothes with jeans and hoodies being my usual apparel.
I shake my head, trying to push those awkward thoughts into the back of my mind. Mr. Meyama looked at me with amusement once more.
"I do not ogle women." I hiss, Mr. Meyama holding his hands up in surrender.
"Whatever you say Little Cub."
I sigh, looking down at the now-empty bowl of noodles. I reached down to dig my wallet out of my jeans but Mr. Meyama just laughed.
"It's on the house this time. Consider it a gift."
"Thanks. Have a good night Mr. Meyama." I spoke standing from the shop stool and turning to leave with a wave.
I made it home in record time, the city quiet as I locked up the apartment and went to my room. Collapsing into the bed with a groan as I got dressed for the night, my clothes being thrown in the general area of my clothes hamper as I curled up under my covers.
Sleep was about to take me before I heard a knock at the door, the sound making me stiffen, a pang of fear coursing through me.
Who could that be?
I tried to ignore it, but then I cracked open my eyes slightly and my heart sank. Flashing red and blue lights showed through my window. The police were here, and they were knocking on my door.
The knocking continued, the banging growing louder as I moved through the apartment, my heart beating through my chest as I neared the door.
"Atlas Police Department, open up!" A muffled voice called through the door between knocks.
"C-coming!" I called back as I neared the door, my hand shakily reaching out and turning the deadbolt, grabbing the handle and turning it, pulling the door open. Two officers, a man, and a woman, both human, standing on the other side. "Can I help you?"
The woman cleared her throat, her face somber as she looked at me, but still composed. "Are you Ryker Thorn?"
I silently nod.
The man cleared his throat this time. "Your mother is Maria Thorn correct?"
I nod again.
The officers look at each other before the woman steps forward. "You are going to want to sit down." She commented, her hand ghosting over my shoulder as she turned me and led me into the living room like she owned the place, bringing me to the couch. I sat down as she prompted before she cleared her throat again. "Your mother's office was attacked tonight by the White Fang."
"Where's my mom?" I shouted standing up, the man placing his hand on my shoulder, keeping me from moving away from the couch.
"Son…Your mom was murdered. O-her w-n…es s- sh- pr…ed ….."
My ears rang, the sound of the officer's voice drifting away in the all-encompassing noise. The world fell away from me as my vision blurred.
Maria was dead?
Mom was dead?
A choked sob escaped me. I felt hands on me, guiding me down to the couch as my legs gave out.
My mom was dead, and the last time we spoke we were arguing and I didn't tell her I loved her. I didn't say 'I love you'. Her last words to me were 'I love you' and my last words were 'Have a good day at work'.
My heart broke as I let out a blood-curdling scream, my entire body feeling like it was releasing every bit of energy at once. Just as I felt like I was losing steam, just as it felt like every last drop of energy in my body was shouted out in a fatalistic cry of pain I felt a surge of renewed energy. My pain pushes the energy to heights I have never felt. It all built and built, all of it boiling over as everything just exploded. All of it all at once, like lightning striking the ground. It all went out into the air around me.
Electricity cracked and the world snapped around me.
As my vision cleared I heard the sound of electricity arcing. Thin blue tendrils snaking around my entire body before settling. I was in front of my door again, my key in the lock, no police in sight.
Like an anvil crashing down on me, my legs gave out as my mind swam, my body slamming hard into the ground, the side of my head bouncing off the concrete floor just outside my apartment. My eyes slid shut as I felt myself losing consciousness. I felt like I was dying.
Dying…
My moms dead.
I didn't tell her I loved her.
My eyes peeled open slowly. The room I was now in blinded me. White walls and bright fluorescent lights. I was in a hospital. The stiff bed groaned as I shifted a bit, my legs turning and dangling off the bed till I felt the cold tiled floor greet my sock-covered feet.
Wires attached to me popped free as I lifted myself slowly from the bed, loud annoying beeps and alarms sounding once the machines lost the purchase of me. Just as I was about to be fully standing, a small gasp sounded across the room. I lifted my head to see who made the sound. A woman dressed in scrubs looked at me in awe.
I tried to take a step, my knees immediately buckling from underneath me, as I smashed into the ground with a grunt.
"Doctor!" The woman's voice screamed out, footsteps smacking against the tile as I felt hands help me sit up. "Hey, don't try to move too much. Your body is extremely weak right now."
I nod numbly, confused about why I was in the hospital. Last I remembered I was…oh.
Mom is dead.
I don't process anything much after. The doctors say I'm in shock and need time to come out of it. I simply nodded and let them believe whatever they wanted. I vaguely remember them telling me why I was there. That I had been found by police on my doorstep in aura shock. My aura unlocked somehow and was immediately shattered to a near-fatal point. My very soul was torn to shreds by an unknown force. I was put into an aura-induced coma, it had been six weeks since I had been brought in.
Then they told me about Mom. They didn't have much of her to recover, but what they could recover was cremated. They promised that her urn would be dropped off a few days after they discharged me. It left me numb.
The doctor let me know that I was going to be talked to by police and that a representative from the SDC would be dropping by to discuss a settlement for the loss of my mom once I was released from care. They gave me instructions on how to rehab myself, pushing for me to stay in the hospital during my recovery but I shook them off. The walk home was quiet.
Climbing the steps to my apartment felt like climbing a mountain. Not because of the physical strain, but because the apartment would always be a reminder of what I had lost. My hand hesitated in front of the door, the key to the house shaking in my closed fist. Pressing it into the lock and letting myself in I felt it all hit at once.
This house felt like her, and it was painful. The tacky recliner she had claimed as hers. Her coffee mugs were still in the sink, dumb little sayings plastered across them. Her makeup was scattered across the dining room table, she always said the lighting in the dining room was the best for applying makeup. Her bass guitar leaning against the windowsill, she would always make it a point to play a few hours a week. A picture of her and me on my adoption day, I was so excited to legally be her kid.
Every square inch of the house reminded me of her. She haunted the house and in turn haunted me. Every moment of silence in the once cozy now suffocating apartment had me straining my ears, hoping I would hear her again. That she wasn't dead but instead she was just in another room, waiting for me to find her.
Opening the door to her room felt like opening a tomb. It was hers, and since she was gone it was meant to stay shut. Yet, I couldn't bear the thought of not going in, of not surrounding myself in the protection that her room offered me.
The door creaked open, my sniffles filling the room as thunder flashed through the apartment. Maria's room illuminates for a split second before falling into the darkness once more. A terrified squeak escaped my mouth as the thunder cracked a moment later.
"Ryker? Sweetie is that you?" Maria's sleep-addled voice sounded. The bear Faunus sat up, her eyes immediately landing on me. She took a single look at my tear-streaked face before she held open her arms for me. "Oh sweetheart, come here."
A sob escapes my lips as I run to her bed, practically leaping into her arms, burying my face into her chest as she pulls me into the bed with her. My body jolts when another flash and crack of the storm shakes the house.
"Oh little one, is the storm scary?" Maria asked. My face nodded but refused to pull away from her. She was the only thing that could protect me. "Yeah, it is pretty scary huh? That's ok though, you can sleep with me tonight. I will keep you safe sweetheart."
Maria leaned back, laying me down as she rolled us onto our sides, her arms wrapped around me. Her chin rested on the top of my head as I felt her grab the covers and pull them over us.
It took a while before my sobs slowly came to an end, the entire time she whispered to me about how much she loved me. How she would protect me from her dying breath.
"Did you know that bear faunus like me are territorial?" She whispered, her voice steady and warm.
"What does terry toreel mean?"
She giggled, pressing a small kiss to the top of my head. " It means that I don't like others in my spaces like my home and my room. It's mine, and everything inside of it is mine. You count as that, my precious little baby boy. So in the future, when you are scared when you don't feel safe. I want you to come to my room as soon as possible because in my room nobody and nothing could hurt you. You will always be safe with me." She murmured, her arms tightening for a moment to show me that as long as I was with her I was safe.
I climbed into Mom's bed, the sheets, blanket, and pillows still saturated in her scent. Tears ran freely as I curled into a ball, the sheets bunched up in my fists. I hadn't done this in years. The safety of her room was something that she introduced me to so young, and yet now it didn't feel safe at all, it felt empty. Like the rest of the apartment.
"I can't do this without you mom. I don't know what to do." I whisper into the pillow I had buried my face into. The world continued to move on when all I wanted to do was to turn back the clock. To get a single second more with her. Just one second would mean the world.